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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,068 --> 00:00:06,072 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP 2 00:00:17,751 --> 00:00:20,019 - IT'S ALIVE ! 3 00:00:38,905 --> 00:00:39,806 - YEP. 4 00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:40,740 [SIGHS] 5 00:00:40,807 --> 00:00:42,375 [DING DONG] 6 00:00:43,009 --> 00:00:44,210 - OH, WILL IT HURT? 7 00:00:44,277 --> 00:00:45,845 - ONLY IF GOD HATES YOU. 8 00:00:45,912 --> 00:00:46,980 - HEY, MAMA MIA! 9 00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:48,581 THE CANNOLI, EH, LASAGNA! 10 00:00:48,648 --> 00:00:52,051 - HEY, PASTA FAZUL, A SPICY MEATBALL! 11 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:57,257 [WHISTLING] 12 00:00:57,323 --> 00:00:58,258 [DING DONG] 13 00:00:58,324 --> 00:01:01,594 - DUDE, IT'S TIME TO PIMP YOUR SISTER. 14 00:01:01,661 --> 00:01:02,429 - OH, YEAH! 15 00:01:02,495 --> 00:01:03,196 MAN, I CAN'T BELIEVE-- 16 00:01:03,263 --> 00:01:04,364 YO, MAN, MY SISTER RIGHT IN THERE. 17 00:01:04,431 --> 00:01:06,566 COME PIMP THAT BITCH OUT! 18 00:01:09,269 --> 00:01:10,103 - WAIT! W-WAIT! 19 00:01:10,170 --> 00:01:12,071 WAIT! I HAVE HOMEWORK. 20 00:01:13,807 --> 00:01:15,074 - HEY, LADIES! 21 00:01:15,141 --> 00:01:17,076 - WE GON' PIMP YOU OUT! 22 00:01:17,143 --> 00:01:20,313 - GIRL, YOU GOT SERIOUS LIBRARIAN HAIR. 23 00:01:20,380 --> 00:01:22,682 - YOU EVER SEE A HO SHOP AT THE GAP? 24 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:25,485 - YOU GOT THE POSTURE OF A LAMP POST, GIRL. 25 00:01:25,551 --> 00:01:27,387 WE GOT TO GIVE YOU SOME PROSTI-TUDE. 26 00:01:27,454 --> 00:01:29,789 - IF WE GO WITH A LEOPARD PRINT TANK TOP, 27 00:01:29,856 --> 00:01:31,991 THAT'S A LITTLE TOO SOUTHEAST NEWARK. 28 00:01:32,058 --> 00:01:34,694 SO WE'RE GOING WITH MORE OF A CHEETAH PATTERN. 29 00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:37,764 - GARTER BELTS AIN'T JUST FOR WEDDINGS, HONEY CHILD. 30 00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:39,899 YOU CAN TUCK A WEAPON IN THERE. 31 00:01:39,966 --> 00:01:41,868 AT FIRST, I WAS PRETTY NERVOUS, 32 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:45,305 BUT THESE HOS ARE ALL ABOUT CLASS. 33 00:01:45,371 --> 00:01:48,475 - SOMETIMES A JOHN WILL WANT TO DO THAT WITH YOU, 34 00:01:48,541 --> 00:01:50,076 AND THAT'LL COST $10. 35 00:01:50,143 --> 00:01:50,910 - EWW. 36 00:01:50,977 --> 00:01:52,745 - THIS ONE--$50. 37 00:01:52,812 --> 00:01:53,646 - UGH. 38 00:01:53,713 --> 00:01:56,449 - AND THIS ONE GON' REQUIRE A CREDIT CARD. 39 00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:58,985 - AGAIN! - DON'T PLAY ME! 40 00:01:59,051 --> 00:02:00,253 - AGAIN! - DON'T PLAY ME! 41 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:03,556 - ALL RIGHT, ALEX, NOW WE AIN'T HAD A LOT TO WORK WITH HERE, 42 00:02:03,623 --> 00:02:05,625 BUT, YO, CHECK OUT YOUR NEW SISTER! 43 00:02:05,692 --> 00:02:06,893 - ALL RIGHT, LET ME SEE. 44 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:07,861 [GASPS] 45 00:02:07,926 --> 00:02:09,461 OH, DAMN! 46 00:02:09,529 --> 00:02:10,295 OH, YOU PUT THE HEELS-- 47 00:02:10,363 --> 00:02:11,731 AND, OH, YOU GOT THIS GARTER-- 48 00:02:11,798 --> 00:02:13,533 DAMN... 49 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:15,401 OH, DAMN! 50 00:02:15,468 --> 00:02:16,402 IT'S THE NEW ME-- 51 00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:20,673 NOT JUST ON THE OUTSIDE, BUT ON THE INSIDE, TOO. 52 00:02:20,740 --> 00:02:23,476 [ALL TALKING AT ONCE] 53 00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:25,311 - IT'S SO HARD WHEN THEY LEAVE. 54 00:02:25,378 --> 00:02:26,312 IT'S SO HARD. 55 00:02:26,379 --> 00:02:27,313 - HEY, Y'ALL! 56 00:02:27,380 --> 00:02:28,081 HEY, YO, MAN! 57 00:02:28,147 --> 00:02:29,315 YO, COME GET A PIECE OF MY SISTER! 58 00:02:29,382 --> 00:02:31,117 WHO WANTS TO GET UP IN MY SISTER'S ASS? 59 00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:33,820 - OH, HELLO, MR. JOHNSON. 60 00:02:33,887 --> 00:02:34,621 - HELLO, AMY. 61 00:02:34,687 --> 00:02:37,323 DO YOU TAKE CREDIT CARDS? 62 00:02:39,526 --> 00:02:41,828 - EWW. 63 00:02:42,428 --> 00:02:44,831 - WE'LL BE DEAD SOON. 64 00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:48,234 - OW. 65 00:02:48,301 --> 00:02:50,336 I'M TELLING MY DAD. 66 00:02:50,870 --> 00:02:54,007 - WELCOME TO "THE SURREAL LIFE." 67 00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:57,577 - COME ON, COME ON. 68 00:02:57,644 --> 00:02:59,078 GET DOWN. 69 00:02:59,145 --> 00:03:03,383 - LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT "THE SURREAL LIFE" GANG HAS BEEN UP TO RECENTLY. 70 00:03:03,449 --> 00:03:05,151 - WE WERE REALLY EXCITED TO PARTICIPATE 71 00:03:05,218 --> 00:03:07,220 IN THE IDITAROD DOGSLED RACE... 72 00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:10,857 TILL ONE OF THE DOGS FELL IN LOVE WITH MANNY MO. 73 00:03:11,190 --> 00:03:12,525 - HELP! THE DOG-- 74 00:03:12,592 --> 00:03:13,393 AAH! 75 00:03:13,459 --> 00:03:14,761 - LET'S SEE WHAT'S IN STORE 76 00:03:14,827 --> 00:03:17,030 FOR OUR "SURREAL LIFE" FOLKS TODAY. 77 00:03:17,096 --> 00:03:18,831 - WE HAVE TO TAKE THE ONE RING 78 00:03:18,898 --> 00:03:22,168 AND DESTROY IT IN THE FIRES OF MOUNT DOOM. 79 00:03:22,235 --> 00:03:25,038 - OOH! 80 00:03:27,874 --> 00:03:31,044 - WAIT, SOMETHING'S COMING! 81 00:03:35,915 --> 00:03:38,551 - AAH! 82 00:03:46,091 --> 00:03:47,927 - THERE'S NO WAY I'M DOING THIS. 83 00:03:47,994 --> 00:03:49,629 SOMEBODY BETTER GET ME A CAB 84 00:03:49,696 --> 00:03:51,564 BECAUSE I'M GOING-- 85 00:04:12,852 --> 00:04:14,520 - WE MUST HELPS THEM. 86 00:04:14,587 --> 00:04:16,289 THEY'S OUR FRIEND. 87 00:04:16,356 --> 00:04:19,192 THEY HATES MANNY MO. 88 00:04:19,257 --> 00:04:22,428 NO, THEY LOVES US. 89 00:04:22,495 --> 00:04:26,332 IF THEY DIES, WE GO GET PIZZA. 90 00:04:26,399 --> 00:04:29,268 AAH! AAH! 91 00:04:29,869 --> 00:04:32,472 [SINGING INDISTINCTLY] 92 00:04:32,538 --> 00:04:33,573 [URINATING] 93 00:04:33,640 --> 00:04:35,274 - AHH. 94 00:04:37,909 --> 00:04:40,079 [ROARING] 95 00:04:40,146 --> 00:04:42,281 - AAH! 96 00:04:44,183 --> 00:04:48,588 - BACK TO THE FIRES THAT FORGED YOU, EVIL TRINKET! 97 00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:49,589 WHOA! 98 00:04:49,656 --> 00:04:51,290 - OH! 99 00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:59,132 - COREY, YOU SAVED ME, BRO. 100 00:04:59,198 --> 00:05:00,166 - YOU CAN BURN IN HELL. 101 00:05:00,233 --> 00:05:01,501 I JUST WANT THE RING. 102 00:05:01,567 --> 00:05:02,902 - COREY, NO! 103 00:05:02,969 --> 00:05:03,903 [SPLAT] 104 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:04,704 OH, BRO! 105 00:05:04,771 --> 00:05:07,974 - OH, FRIENDS, REMEMBER ME FONDLY... 106 00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:12,378 IN "STAND BY ME" AND IN "THE LOST BOYS"-- 107 00:05:12,445 --> 00:05:13,346 ONLY THE FIRST HALF. 108 00:05:13,413 --> 00:05:16,049 WAIT, AND "FRIDAY THE 13th" WAS PRETTY GOOD-- 109 00:05:16,115 --> 00:05:18,351 - NEXT TIME ON "THE SURREAL LIFE"... 110 00:05:18,418 --> 00:05:23,222 - WELL, RON AND I HAD TO CHECK OUT A SUSPICIOUS METEOR. 111 00:05:23,289 --> 00:05:25,091 [BEEPING] 112 00:05:25,158 --> 00:05:27,326 [ROARS] 113 00:05:32,331 --> 00:05:33,199 - BOO ! 114 00:05:33,266 --> 00:05:36,002 HEH HEH HEH. 115 00:05:38,938 --> 00:05:40,073 [SCREAMING] 116 00:05:40,139 --> 00:05:44,844 - YOU DIDN'T THINK IT'D BE THAT EASY, DID YOU? 117 00:05:45,478 --> 00:05:48,347 CHOCOLATE CHICKEN EGGS FOR EVERYONE! 118 00:05:48,414 --> 00:05:49,615 - 1, 2, 3, 4! 119 00:05:49,682 --> 00:05:51,884 WE LOVE IT WHEN OUR PLAYERS SCORE! 120 00:05:51,951 --> 00:05:53,286 5, 6, 7, 8! 121 00:05:53,352 --> 00:05:54,954 DOUBLE ENTENDRES ARE REALLY GREAT! 122 00:05:55,021 --> 00:05:58,157 - I WANT TO GO TO DALLAS, BUT I DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY. 123 00:05:58,224 --> 00:05:59,425 - WE'RE SUCH GOOD FRIENDS, 124 00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:01,928 WE'LL HAVE SEX WITH PEOPLE FOR MONEY 125 00:06:01,994 --> 00:06:03,129 AND GIVE IT TO YOU. 126 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:03,796 - YEAH! 127 00:06:03,863 --> 00:06:05,665 - OH, BEST FRIENDS FOREVER! 128 00:06:05,732 --> 00:06:10,503 - WE'RE SOAKING WET FROM WASHING YOUR CAR, MR. THRUSTBONE. 129 00:06:10,570 --> 00:06:13,439 - IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE WE CAN DO FOR YOU? 130 00:06:13,506 --> 00:06:17,343 - I'LL GIVE YOU $20 FOR ALL OF US TO GO CRAZY. 131 00:06:17,410 --> 00:06:18,044 - WOW! 132 00:06:18,111 --> 00:06:21,180 $20 IN 1978 DOLLARS IS A LOT. 133 00:06:21,247 --> 00:06:22,215 - YEAH! UH-HUH! 134 00:06:22,281 --> 00:06:23,649 UNH! UNH! UNH! 135 00:06:23,716 --> 00:06:24,584 - YEAH! 136 00:06:24,650 --> 00:06:26,285 OH, YOU LOOK JUST LIKE MY DAUGHTER'S FRIENDS. 137 00:06:26,352 --> 00:06:27,320 OH, YEAH. 138 00:06:27,386 --> 00:06:28,187 OH! OH! 139 00:06:28,254 --> 00:06:30,490 - WATCH OUT FOR THE ICING. 140 00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:31,357 DANG IT. 141 00:06:31,424 --> 00:06:32,692 - WE RAISED $39. 142 00:06:32,759 --> 00:06:36,729 - THAT'S EXACTLY ENOUGH TO GET TO DALLAS. 143 00:06:36,796 --> 00:06:37,430 YAY! 144 00:06:37,497 --> 00:06:40,533 I'M FINALLY IN DALLAS. 145 00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:41,433 - MOO. 146 00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:45,738 - OH, I WONDER HOW MUCH IT IS TO GET BACK. 147 00:06:55,548 --> 00:06:58,317 - I'M STEPPING DOWN THE LADDER AND-- 148 00:06:58,384 --> 00:06:59,652 UH-OH! OH. 149 00:06:59,719 --> 00:07:01,721 UH-OH, I'M FALLING. 150 00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:02,588 YEAH. 151 00:07:02,655 --> 00:07:04,223 YEAH, I'M FALLING ON THE MOON. 152 00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:09,095 YES, I'M FALLING ON THE MOON. 153 00:07:10,129 --> 00:07:11,898 [THUD] 154 00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:13,599 - AAH! 155 00:07:15,034 --> 00:07:19,806 OK, UH, HAILING FREQUENCIES ARE OPEN. 156 00:07:19,872 --> 00:07:22,608 [ALL TALKING AT ONCE] 157 00:07:25,812 --> 00:07:27,613 [TALKING STOPS] 158 00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:31,951 [ALL SHOUTING AT ONCE] 159 00:07:35,454 --> 00:07:36,055 [SIGHS] 160 00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:37,790 - IS HE GOING TO DO IT AGAIN? 161 00:07:37,857 --> 00:07:39,558 - WRONG, YOUR RESERVATIONS ARE. 162 00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:41,027 FOR US TO LISTEN TO RAY GRIFFITHS, 163 00:07:41,093 --> 00:07:44,263 THE ACTOR WHO PLAYED THE POWER DROID IN "EPISODE IV," 164 00:07:44,330 --> 00:07:45,665 THIS IS ROOM IS SCHEDULED. 165 00:07:45,731 --> 00:07:46,532 - I RESERVED ROOM A-2 166 00:07:46,599 --> 00:07:47,800 TO WATCH THE "STAR TREK" BLOOPER REEL 167 00:07:47,867 --> 00:07:50,203 WHERE DeFOREST KELLEY GRABS MAJEL BARRETT'S CHEST. 168 00:07:50,269 --> 00:07:52,572 THE PRIME DIRECTIVE DEMANDS THAT YOU LEAVE THE PREMISES. 169 00:07:52,638 --> 00:07:54,340 - THE PRIME DIRECTIVE SUCKS. 170 00:07:54,407 --> 00:07:56,475 - YOU SUCK, YOU NERF HERDER! 171 00:07:56,542 --> 00:07:58,711 - OOH, SEVEN OF NINE... 172 00:07:58,778 --> 00:08:00,446 - I HEARD ONE WILLIAM SHATNER 173 00:08:00,513 --> 00:08:03,282 IS GOING TO DO A GUEST SPOT ON "ENTERPRISE" 174 00:08:03,349 --> 00:08:04,884 AND NOT AS KIRK! 175 00:08:04,951 --> 00:08:05,685 [GASPING] 176 00:08:05,751 --> 00:08:06,953 - YOU TAKE THAT BACK! 177 00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:10,656 [MAKING SWOOSHING SOUNDS] 178 00:08:10,723 --> 00:08:11,791 - GENTLEMEN, GENTLEMEN, 179 00:08:11,858 --> 00:08:15,161 WE COULD DISCUSS THIS LOGICALLY. 180 00:08:15,728 --> 00:08:16,662 [ALL SHOUTING] 181 00:08:16,729 --> 00:08:18,865 - EXCUSE ME, I'M RAY GRIFFITH. 182 00:08:18,931 --> 00:08:20,832 OH, MY FACE! 183 00:08:21,868 --> 00:08:22,869 - YOU KIDS STOP. 184 00:08:22,935 --> 00:08:23,736 NO FIGHTING. 185 00:08:23,803 --> 00:08:24,770 OH, GET OFF ME. OW. 186 00:08:24,837 --> 00:08:25,705 MY NECK, MY SPINE. 187 00:08:25,771 --> 00:08:28,507 OH, NO, NOT LIKE THIS. 188 00:08:31,010 --> 00:08:33,279 - EXCUSE ME, BUT ARE YOU GENTLEMEN 189 00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:35,147 ENGAGED IN A GAME OF LARP-- 190 00:08:35,213 --> 00:08:36,315 LIVE ACTION ROLE-PLAYING? 191 00:08:36,381 --> 00:08:38,351 I HAPPEN TO BE AN OLD HAND AT IT. 192 00:08:38,417 --> 00:08:39,652 AAH! 193 00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:42,054 LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! 194 00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:42,889 FIRE--FIRE-- 195 00:08:42,955 --> 00:08:45,358 - EXCUSE ME, THAT'S IMPOLITE. 196 00:08:45,424 --> 00:08:47,159 OW! 197 00:08:47,226 --> 00:08:49,028 STOP! 198 00:08:49,095 --> 00:08:51,864 OH, THAT'S IT! 199 00:08:53,165 --> 00:08:55,534 - ALL SYSTEMS READY. 200 00:09:04,110 --> 00:09:05,678 - DON'T WORRY, MR. SCHUMACHER, 201 00:09:05,745 --> 00:09:07,146 WE'LL GET YOU OUT OF HERE. 202 00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,147 [GASPS] 203 00:09:08,214 --> 00:09:10,783 - JOEL SCHUMACHER IS HISTORY'S GREATEST MONSTER. 204 00:09:10,850 --> 00:09:11,717 - GET HIM! 205 00:09:11,784 --> 00:09:12,585 LET'S GET HIM! 206 00:09:12,652 --> 00:09:15,621 [ALL SHOUTING AT ONCE] 207 00:09:15,688 --> 00:09:16,622 - GOT HIM! 208 00:09:16,689 --> 00:09:18,391 I GOT HIM! 209 00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:20,426 - KEEP IT COMING. 210 00:09:20,493 --> 00:09:21,427 - OK, GOT IT. GOT IT. 211 00:09:21,494 --> 00:09:24,063 - GET ANOTHER ONE. GET ME ANOTHER ONE. 212 00:09:31,771 --> 00:09:32,705 - SHAME ON YOU. 213 00:09:32,772 --> 00:09:35,708 YOU'VE ALL FORGOTTEN THE TRUE MEANING OF FANDOM. 214 00:09:35,775 --> 00:09:38,444 WE SHOULD TAKE JOY IN OUR LOVES, 215 00:09:38,511 --> 00:09:41,347 NOT ARGUE ABOUT THEM. 216 00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:42,214 [LAUGHS] 217 00:09:42,281 --> 00:09:44,483 SON OF A BITCH! 218 00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:47,086 [GUNSHOTS] 219 00:10:11,844 --> 00:10:14,547 CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP 220 00:10:14,613 --> 00:10:18,250 CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org-- 221 00:10:18,317 --> 00:10:22,188 [CHICKENS CLUCKING THEME SONG] 13158

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