All language subtitles for 2.Broke.Girls.S04E08.And.the.Fun.Factory.1080p.AMZN.WEBRip.DD5.1.x264-CasStudio_track3_[eng]

Thank you, everyone,
for staying late

to learn our new
iPad order system.

We had no choice, you locked
the door from the outside.

[Chuckles]
Either way, we're learning.

Han, why would we update
our order system

when our uniforms
are from the 1970's

and our paycheck
is from the 1800s?

Let's get to the tutorial.

Max, you and i
are going to role-play.

All right, you can be
the little bitch,

and I'll be me.

I don't need this lesson.

I'm very familiar
with the touch screen.

Let's just say
i put the "goo" in Google.

I'm going to pretend
I'm a customer,

and order a hamburger.

Hello, miss.
I'll have a hamburger.

Certainly, miss.
[Chuckles]

Would you like that
with or without salmonella?

Han, I got my first lesson
on the iPad from Steve Jobs,

and now I'm getting it
from han jobs?

Caroline, don't act like you
know more about gadgets than me.

Formerly rich doesn't beat
currently Asian.

Now, come on, everyone
look at their iPads.

What iPad?
I didn't see an iPad

what? No.

Did somebody say something
about an iPad?

What the hell is an iPad?

Where did they all go?

I'm guessing ebay.

I want them all back,
especially mine.

I'm in a casual flirtation
with a woman in Australia.

She's part aboriginal,
but has a great personality.

(peter bjorn and John)
* ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

[cash register bell dings]

* ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh *

here you go, Earl.

Max, what's wrong?
You seem happy.

I'm just still on a high
from this $10,000 bank loan

I got last week.

And from an almost certainly
laced pot brownie I ate in 2004.

I can't believe you and Caroline
got a bank loan

for your cupcake business,

and not a single hostage
was involved.

Max, you don't have $10,000.

You don't even have netflix.

This money is to pay a factory
to make our cupcake t-shirts,

and I've whittled it
down to three.

Hello.

Speaking of whittled.

Someone used my printer,
and I'm guessing it's Caroline,

'cause it's about business

and not another one of Earl's
Angela bassett collages.

What can I say, man?
I'm a bassett hound.

Oh, thanks, han.

These are the factories
I've been researching.

We want our t-shirts
to be American made.

I have an American maid,

and all she's good at
is eating my granola bars.

Look, Max, I found one
right here in Brooklyn.

"American Ace.
The founder, Ace hardwick,

is devoted to treating
his workers well,"

and not in a creepy way
like that American apparel guy.

So you're saying
none of these workers

have ever found
an Ace in their hole?

Look, I've worked
in a lot of factories.

I know what goes on.

I worked in a coat factory,

which is why my lungs
are coated in asbestos.

I worked
in an underwear factory,

where I was underpaid
for the fruits of my looms,

and worst factory of all,
the cheesecake factory.

Oh.

How about we do
a walk-through tomorrow

to make sure it's up to snuff?

Well, if they have snuff,

why are we waiting
till tomorrow?

Hey, everybody!
[Laughs]

Oh, hey.
Hi, great news!

I just got carded
at buffalo wild wings!

Really?
I got carted out of there once.

And more great news:

I'm starting
my own new business.

So girls, you know
how you have that $10,000?

Well, I don't want
to clean you out,

but how do you feel
about tossing me $9,500?

You two should invest.
Sophie's business is genius.

You know how a bunch of ladies
got their down-there-hair

permanently lasered off?

Yeah, that's when your waxer
gives you a Michael chiklis.

Yeah.

Well, Sophie's offering
a product

that puts grass
back on your field.

(Sophie)
Yeah.

That's not a business.
That's nobody's business.

Yeah, I don't do
any of that stuff.

I just throw a scrunchie
on mine and go.

Hey, there's a need for this.
Sometimes, in the fog,

my plane gets lost
without a landing strip.

We're out.

Oh, don't decide yet, girls.

You haven't even heard
the cute, little name.

"Sophie kuchenksi's
vagina wigs!"

Yeah, we're really out.

Oh.
But it's a quality product,

and it's real hair
imported from "va-China."

Yeah, never been further out.

And this is our main floor.

[Gasps]
Wow, this is amazing!

I feel like we're
in the Willy wonka factory.

I know, right?

The American Ace motto
is "work is fun."

Max was expecting
a different kind of factory.

More torture, less foosball.

I know, right?
Not at American Ace.

And what is your position here,
Peggy?

Are you the "i know, right?"
Person?

[Laughs]
I know, right?

No, I'm one of the owners.
Also, I dye t-shirts.

See, every employee gets
a percentage of the company

after six months, so the longer
you stay, the more it grows.

We've been at the diner
four years,

and the only thing we've seen
grow is Oleg's pants.

I know, right?

Well, Ace is expecting you.
Go ahead, go have fun!

[Laughs]

Hey, don't be fooled
by what's on the surface.

You look like you have money,

but I know your underwear's
in shreds.

Not shreds, Max, shred.

Just one, it goes
from front to back.

Um, hi, should we just come in?
The door is open.

Yep, always is.

Doors create boundaries.
Boundaries are a bummer.

You know what else is a bummer?

Tall guys with small penises?

That you just missed the gelato
and designer coffee cart.

Espresso hazelnut praline?

We're not here for gelato.

[Chuckles]
We're not not here for gelato.

Awesome.
It's awesome to meet you.

I'm Ace hardwick.

Look, "Ace", we're not
about to give you $10,000

so you can take advantage
of a sad, underage girl worker

near the loading docks
'cause her boobs are crazy big

and she needs a ride home.

That's a "for instance."

I'm sorry?

See, Ace, Max has
some trust issues

when it comes to factories,
so, we're here today to...

You're pretty much
eating cardboard there.

You want me to get you another?

You should see her
with tuna cans.

Hey, I see the prosciutto cart.

Who wants imported ham?

Me!
[Laughs]

Well, we're not not here
for prosciutto.

Hey, you know what's cool?

Short guys with big penises?

[Laughs]
You're fun.

Your business
belongs here at American Ace.

Come on, let's go
meet the family.

That guy kind of creeps me out.

On the plus side,
i finally get to meet my family.

I had this space designed
for open energy

and open conversation.

What's up, other owners?

(All)
What's up, Ace?

Our sales, by 400%!

[All cheering]

Max, this is it.
This is our factory.

(Caroline)
The employees look
happy and successful.

So did the members of 'n sync.

But behind the curtain,
a veil of tears.

Hey, Caroline,
here's the prosciutto cart.

[Gasps]
Thanks, Ace!

Enjoy.
I'm just gonna get

a quick five-minute
chair massage.

Come on, let's slip out
while Ace has got his head

stuck in that chair's ass.

Hey, what's up?

Welcome to American Ace.
I'm rico.

You're, like, really,
really, really pretty.

Aw... oh!

So anyways, I'm part owner,
and I clean the bathroom.

Hmm, quick question:
Do you have a light cabernet?

Quicker question:

Where's the secret room
with the toddler slaves?

What's up? I'm Raul,
part owner and security guard.

Hey, you two want to grab
a drink sometime?

Fridays after work, we all hang
next door at tortilla flats.

Tortilla flat.
Wasn't that your stripper name?

You're just jealous
'cause mine's taller

and thinks I'm really,
really, really pretty.

Good luck with that
tall guy scenario.

Sorry we're late, but we were
busy with our other business,

the one we care about.

How can I be mad with that
Sincere, heartfelt apology?

Who wants to see
our sample t-shirts?

I want to see it, but I want
to see a lot of things.

With these damn cataracts,
the best I can do

is look towards it
and get a milky idea.

Hey, girls!

I want to show you
some of my new styles

for my "everybody's merkin
for the weekend" collection.

Sophie, what's a merkin?

It's a vagina wig.

Oh, that's dirty.

And han, I'm gonna need
your input,

because I'm working
on an Asian line.

Shouldn't han grow
some hair on his

before he starts
tossing out advice?

Han, I need to know
if I got the texture right,

so come over here.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, that feels nice.
Ohh.

Ohh.

Yeah, nice and thick
between my fingers.

Oh, yeah.

Slower.

Slower still.

This is like watching
your gerbil hump a pencil.

Not really sexual,
but still grosses you out.

Sophie,
i-i think you should stop.

I haven't felt this sensation
since third grade

when madam yi checked me
for head lice.

Remind me to pick up a
"what's happening to my body?"

Book for han tomorrow.

Oh, girls, I'll be over here,

working on my
african/american line.

Yeah, I can't decide whether
to call it a "vag-afro"

or a "pube-a gooding, Jr."

Max, look.
These shirts look amazing.

Well, I guess I was wrong
about the factory.

Like I was wrong about you

making it
through that first winter.

Look, there's a note in here.

Oh, it's probably from rico.
He's obsessed with me.

Yeah, it's not from him.

It says, "help us."

Underpaid workers are trapped
in that factory, I knew it!

Once again, I was fooled
by ice cream.

Yes, it's a note that says,
"help us,"

but if there's one thing
i learned in business school,

it's if you don't see it,
it doesn't exist.

Look, as much as we want to,
we can't just look away.

We need to talk to the workers.

Call the guy, the one
who thinks you're pretty.

I don't know who
you're talking about.

I only met a guy who thought

I was really, really,
really pretty.

We can meet them
at that Mexican place.

Ooh, a Mexican place!

I forgot about
the latina market!

Girls, when you're there,
find out if they'd be interested

in some hair
south of the border.

Didn't know if you ladies wanted
beers or margaritas,

so we got you beer-garitas.

It's five bucks,
but you're worth it.

I love a girl
with a healthy appetite.

Well, you're gonna be
getting down on one knee

before the end
of the appetizers.

So let's just dive right in.
How's factory life treating you?

Give us the skinny...
Which is what I hope you said

when you ordered
those beer-garitas,

'cause I cannot be poor
with a muffin top.

You know, I don't want
to talk about work.

Oh, are you saying you're not
allowed to talk about work?

Your words, we all heard you,
rico or Raul.

Hey, tell me, what do you girls
like to do?

Mm, I like to watch waiters
make guacamole at my table.

When's that gonna happen?

[Sighs]

So about work...
Yeah, okay.

Hey, let's go see what's
going on in beer-garitaville.

What are we gonna do?
I can't get any information

out of rico.
He's so preoccupied

with how pretty, pretty,
pretty I am.

Oh, hi, Peggy.
How are you?

Would you like to join us
and talk about work?

Why don't we talk
about you two skanks

gettin' the hell outta here?

And I thought we were
bad waitresses.

This is Carmen.
She works at the factory too.

We're bffs, and she's
one of the owners, like me.

Yeah, and she's a 100% owner
of rico, so hands off.

We seen you two
sittin' over here

like you're god's friggin' gift.

I know, right?
And not for nothing,

but rico's pit bull
doesn't like other girls.

I'm guessing
that's his pit bull.

And you, hands off Raul.

We have a love
that is deep and real,

and when he finds out about it,
it's gonna be magic.

Yup...
Exactly what I expected.

Upstairs
is Willy wonka's factory,

and down here, they're
waterboarding oompa loompas.

Yo, what's up?
We just comin' here to work

in the dye room
right there as per usual.

Yeah, no biggie.
What yous twos lookin' at?

That was a really good accent.

Thanks.
I played Rizzo in grease.

Should have been Sandy,
but I let

the girl with the limp have it.

Come on, we have to put these on
and go into the dye room,

'cause I'm guessing
that's where it all goes down.

The dye room, I'm not surprised.

I always knew we'd dye together.

Okay, we'll just pretend
to be working here,

like we do at the diner.

Well, well, look who it is,

stuck-up and stuck-up two:
The legend returns.

Max, we gotta go.
My life can't end wearing grey.

What up, ladies?

Last night, you're hanging
with the homies,

and today, boom, you just happen
to be working here.

That's friggin' convenient.

I know, right?

Very friggin' convenient.

I know, right?

We just have to show them
who's boss.

You know, like we do
with the mouse

who lives in our toaster.

So, what, we're gonna scream
and then spray windex at them?

Yo!
See this scar?

Knife fight
with five catholic schoolgirls

over a slushie.
So unless you want

some of what I gave Virginia,
Stephanie, laquetia, latoya,

and the one in the wheelchair,
I'd stay clear.

This is just a misunderstanding.

Rico's not interested in me.

Well, he seemed
pretty into you last night.

Huh, yeah, but that's
before she talked.

Come on, we are not interested
in your men at all.

Not at all.
I mean, come on.

What's that mean?

You're saying
something's wrong with them?

No, she's not saying that
it's just...

It's just what?

We're lovers.

You two are lovers?
'Cause you don't seem...

We don't seem what?
Gay?

No.
Hot enough.

[Scoffs]
Well...

Not hot at all.

I know, right?

Look busy, keep your eyes open.

I think we're in the belly
of the beast.

You talkin' about me?

(Both)
No.

(Caroline)
Max, what do you think's
behind that locked door?

I knew it!
Toddler slaves.

Those kids are in horrible
danger of becoming... Me.

Come on, let's go over there.

What the...
You hit me!

Sorry, so sorry.
Accident!

You throw like a girl.

See, I knew it,
you two aren't gay.

Yous are after our guys!

No, I'm not!
Rico just thought I was

really, really, really pretty.

Oh, hell no!
Leave my lover alone!

Oh!

It's on!

(Caroline)
[Whimpers] No! No!

It's... no, no, no, no, no!
It's not on.

This is silly.
We're not after anyone.

We're here to help
some of those work...

Oh, yeah.
Now, it's on!

Oh!
I warn you!

[Both whimpering]

Oh, hell no!

Back off, bitch!

Who you calling bitch, bitch?

Honey?
You're getting carried away.

[Whimpers]

Now you're really getting
carried away.

Oh, no!
Don't put me in the dryer!

I used to be rich,
I'm dry clean only!

[Strains]

(Both)
Oh! Oh!

That was a big friggin' mistake!

Respect.

You two are a lot tougher

than those girls
from Saint Bridget's.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!
What's happening?

We're busting you.
We know what's happening here.

What, profit sharing
and healthcare?

We found a note in our box
with "help us" scrawled on it.

How do you explain that?

Did you read the back?

Heh heh heh.

"Help us..

"Help you...

To your full potential
at American Ace."

We put one in every box we ship.

I have got to start reading

more than the first sentence
of stuff.

I'm sorry, this is all my fault.

I guess I just wanted to believe

some kids were having
a worse childhood than I was.

Max, don't feel bad.
You thought someone needed help,

and you cared, and that
makes you a good person,

and I'm proud of you.

I said I was sorry.
You don't have to be mean.

Hey, everybody!

I just got my first shipment
of wigs.

Sophie, why are you
walking like that?

Well, I'm not just
the president,

I'm also a client.

Sophie, I think you dropped
something,

unless we have those
giant persian roaches again.

Even a milky version of that
was too much.

You know, Max, maybe someday,
someone like you will come

into this salmonella factory
and rescue us.

What are you writing
on those checks?

"Help us."

We work here.
The "help us" is implied.