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[ship's horn blowing]

[car horn honks]

I have a notion to say to him
you think it was a machine.

And the worst--

For $30 a week, he expects a Cleopatra,
a Mother Hubbard, and a speed record

all rolled into one.

Taxi!

Thirty-nine Riverdale.

Thank you, ma'am.

Good evening.

Mr. Stanton just asked about you, miss.

Oh, is he up?

Practically, miss.

Tally-ho. Nothing like
a good day's sleep, my lad.

Beg your pardon, sir?

Hmm? Oh, I was talking to myself.

Oh, good morn--
Uh, good evening, Miss Brenner.

Good evening.

I hope I didn't spoil your evening.

Oh, no. I enjoy coming here.

It's lovely.

The quiet, I mean.

Oh.

No.

What next?

A letter from Mrs. Henderson Hall.

You'll probably remember as Mrs. James.

She wants you to get her another divorce.

On what grounds?

She wishes to marry, um... Count Pesso.

That's a reason, not grounds.

- Make a appointment.
- Yes, sir.

[doorbell buzzes]

This is practically a duplicate.
It's from Mrs. Mona Cavanaugh.

- Yeah, and what are her grounds?
- The same.

What? They both want to marry Count Pesso?

Oh, no. Pardon.
Her reason is James O'Dell.

Oh.

When will these women realize that reason
has nothing to do with getting a divorce?

- Make an appointment for her.
- Yes, sir.

Probably use, uh, mental cruelty.

Check up and see what grounds
we used for her last time.

Yes, sir.

White versus White?

Yes. The case is called
for 10:00 tomorrow.

You've had one postponement.

Well, let's see it.

[chattering, laughing]

-[man] Uh, good evening, Gaylord.
- Hello, my lads.

Oh, you don't have to pretend
to work hard. We're not clients.

Don't you realize that only
very dull people work this time of day?

Or anytime of day.

I apologize for boring you with this,
but I've just started.

Thank heavens we're here in time
to save you from that old devil work.

Oh, I must do some work tonight.

What do you want us to do,
to sharpen pencils for you?

-[Gaylord] Impossible.
- Good evening.

- I hope I'm in the right place.
- Well, I don't know.

It, uh, says it intends to work.

What? Ah, gentlemen of the jury,
a lady is in distress.

Good. That's where most of them belong
only I spell it with an "H."

[laughs]

Gentlemen, the lady is young,
very lovely to look upon.

Ah, that's different. Very different.

Thank you, gentlemen.

What's her distress?

Her husband will fight her divorce action.

Mm, perhaps he has reasons to.

What difference does that make?

The lady shall have
her current heart's desire

-or I shall have to take down my shingle.
-[phone rings]

Hello?

[woman] Hello. Who is this?

This is Mr. Stanton's secretary.

Is Mr. Richards there, young woman?

I beg your pardon?

- This is Mrs. Richards.
- Oh. Uh, just a moment, please.

Uh, Mrs. Richards.

I'm not here. You haven't seen me.

I Want to speak to my husband
at once, do you hear?

Now don't tell me he's not there
because I know--

Oh, I know what she's saying.
By heart I know it. Tell her I'm not here.

-...or I'll come rush up there--
- Just a moment. Just a moment, please.

- Mr. Richards is not here.
- Oh, I know very well he is there.

I'm sorry, madame. Mr. Richards
is not here. I've not seen him.

I insist on speaking to him--

Mrs. Richards says--

I know. Don't tell me.
Can you imagine her calling me here?

I told her I wasn't coming here.
I told her 20 times I wasn't coming here.

- Have a scene?
- No, a brawl.

Well, you fellas would get married.

Well, it's the normal way to live. Finding
your way out of the house at night.

Everybody should get married once.

Mm. Just to find out
how really happy you can be... single.

- I know, so I don't have to prove it.
- You're both wrong.

- Get a wife such as I have.
- You only see yours once a month.

That's the point.
I'm in no danger. You are.

- Oh, I don't think so.
- A single man is always in danger.

A clever woman could get you
most anytime she wants.

[man] They don't always stay married.

Once a single man is named
co-respondent or even hinted at,

well, you know what happens.

Me? I'm married already
and have a great feeling of security.

But Richards here is married,
doesn't seem to have worked out for him.

He has the wrong kind of wife.
She's interested in him.

- Oh, and yours isn't?
- Not in the least.

Her life is peopled with flowers
and, uh, canary birds.

-[chuckles]
- Beautiful, isn't it?

But are you sure that's all
she's interested in?

Certainly.

I'm afraid you're not too sure.

You haven't any firsthand knowledge,
have you?

When I was a little boy,

I pulled the braids
of the coachman's daughter,

and I was severely punished for it.

I still like to play with girls.

Mm. With or without braids.

But I've learned not to play
in my own yard.

I might add that
I feel the urge to play seriously.

I'm sailing for Paris next week.

- I hope you have a rotten time.
- Thanks. You'd better come along.

It's the only life.

What do you do in New York, uh, hibernate?

I don't get involved.

Or have any fun?

Then, I don't spend much time in New York.

And I haven't a worry in the world.

Huh. Neither have I.

Not yet, anyhow.

- Uh-huh.
- Why "uh-huh"?

Uh-huh, nothing.

Unless she happens to want you,
which she probably doesn't.

But if she did, delicately,

with a tuba accompaniment,

tell the whole town that you've broken up
her home and then walked out on her.

That, my innocent, young friend,
is the new sin

and your luck will have run out.

I haven't the remotest idea
what you're talking about.

And besides, it isn't all luck.

Modest,

isn't he?

What do you think, Miss, uh...

- Brenner.
- Uh, Miss Brenner.

I'm sure it doesn't make
any difference what I think.

But I would like to know.

Well, Mr. Stanton says it isn't all luck
that has kept him single.

I was just wondering
who has the other half of the luck.

May I wait in the library?

Oh, certainly. I'm afraid
I shan't be able to work until later.

- I'll have your dinner served in there.
- Thank you.

Do you suppose she meant anything
by that, hmm?

Yes. Anything.

[laughs]

-[woman] Good evening, Martin.
-[door closes]

There's something about this place
that attracts me.

Yes, I can understand that.

- Can we stop here a moment?
- Certainly, madame.

- I'm going to announce you to Mr. Stanton.
- Please do.

Why doesn't Gaylord keep a maid?

- Criticizing your host?
- Why not if the criticism is constructive.

Who was that gal we passed in the hallway?

I imagine she's his secretary.

She has the look anyhow.

Comforting to have a plain girl
for a darling secretary, isn't it?

You know, I think Richards gets his
office girls from the Follies chorus.

-[laughs]
- Who said that?

Who hasn't said it at one time or another?

- Hello, darling.
- Hello.

- Hello, sweetie.
- Good evening, beautiful.

- Good evening.
- I hope so.

Ah, hello.

Isn't anyone going to say hello
or something to me?

I'm speechless. Lost in admiration.
You never looked so well.

I have a special reason, dear.

- Come along.
- We're coming.

- Do you approve of me, darling?
- Always.

And especially tonight.
What's the occasion?

Don't be curious about that.
Just about me.

I'm curious about everything you do.

That was sweet.

- Shall we go in?
- Yes, dear. Oh, Gaylord.

Who's the girl we passed in the hall?

Girl? Oh, my secretary.

I hoped she was a maid.

You should keep one, dear.

It would be, uh... nice.

Of course. I never thought of it.

I'll attend to it tomorrow. That's a dear.

Uh, the picture...

it, uh, fell down.

Never mind. I'll attend to it.

Thank you.

Oh, I'm not hungry.

You'd better eat.
He may keep you late again.

[sighs] I suppose.

- Uh, the picture.
- Yes?

It didn't fall. Uh, I knocked it down.

Yes, miss. Your dinner is served.

Well, if we expect to
see any of the first act, let's get going.

Oh, let's be very late.

So that you can tramp on everybody's toes?

Don't you love to hear them crunch?
Toes, I mean.

- Oh!
- Come on, come on. Let's go.

- Oh, I have a runner.
- Change?

- No, dear.
- Ahh.

You're a darling. And I'm terribly happy.

That's all that matters.

- Being happy?
- Mm-hmm.

I've some news.

My husband is filing suit for divorce.

- Ahh!
- Really?

And you, my angel, are the co-respondent.

Isn't that exciting?

You-You mean your husband
filing suit for divorce?

Yes, but that's just an incident.

The important thing now
is you and me, angel.

[no audible dialogue]

So I'm an angel.

- Aren't you thrilled?
- Oh, thrilled. [chuckles]

- Congratulations, dear.
- Thanks, darling.

- He actually filed?
- They're drawing up the papers.

- Suppose we get ready.
- Gaylord, you'll have to come now.

- Oh, uh, I'll join up later.
- But it's a celebration.

Let him work, dear. Come along.

Come on, girls. We're very late now.

[woman] Didn't Gaylord look cute
on his knees when you told him?

[woman 2] He's a dear.

- It was very neat, Grace.
- How do you mean neat?

Oh, come, darling. The way you hooked him.

If he doesn't get off the line.

He's been running around loose too long.

I've heard him boast about it.

I do hope everything
turns out all right, dear.

I got the last three without any trouble,
so don't worry too much.

Perhaps Grace wouldn't like
to have you drink so much.

Oh, yes, she would.

She'll make his life a beautiful dream,
until she marries him.

[chuckles] No such thing.

- Let's drink to the fallen angel.
- That isn't me.

But you had the life of one.
Now you've fallen. Or was pushed.

Say, quit kidding. This may be serious.

May be serious?
[chuckles] You quit kidding.

Can you just see Grace on the stand

coyly admitting to the world
that she is terribly in love with Gaylord.

- Oh, I don't believe it.
- Oh, yes, you do.

With just the exact number of tears

explaining how she couldn't resist
the dear boy.

[laughing]

And when the trial is over,
you'll have to marry her.

- Huh?
- To whitewash yourself.

I'll think of you
while I'm away enjoying myself.

- There's a way out.
- Mm-hmm. But it's a long way off.

I should say he'd be free as air
in about, um... four years.

Grace never stays married
longer than that.

[laughs]

Of course, uh, there's the alimony.

There's a way out.

- There always is.
- Sure. Shoot yourself.

- Get committed to an insane asylum.
-[laughs]

I've told you I have the only system--
married freedom.

- Too bad you didn't follow my advice.
- Ah, let him suffer. It'll do him good.

- Come along, infants.
- Already?

- Well, you guys look pretty good.
- Who's coming in my car?

- I am.
- See you later, Gaylord.

- Have you room for all of us?
- Aren't you happy?

Well, how can I be--
uh, you going to the theater without me?

- Then I'll stay, dear.
- Oh, no. No, I-I have some work to do.

Don't work too hard. And you be at
the Circle Club right after the theater.

Of course.

- We'll have fun, darling.
- Oh, I know we will.

Until 11:00.

- Grace.
- Coming.

- Bye-bye, dear.
- Hmm?

Oh.

[clears throat]

Oh.

- Sorry I'm so late.
- Oh, that's quite all right.

- You'll find everything here on the desk.
- Oh, thanks.

Won't take long.

Uh, what does this old fool
want to fight the divorce for?

Man hasn't a chance
with a woman like that.

Who? Mrs. White?

Who else?

Where are my notes?

Is it this?

Oh. Of course.

- Drink it. Do you good.
- No, thanks.

What's the matter?

There's nothing the matter with me

that calls for anything that strong.

Hmm?

Oh.

[sighs]

Expensive?

Uh, the stockings, I mean.

It depends on what sort you buy.

Hmm.

Well, I'd better tackle Mrs. White's
marital difficulty. [clears throat]

The case is open and shut.

Uh, notes for the,
uh, direct examination of Mrs. White.

Uh...

How much do I pay you?

- What?
- What salary do I pay you?

Thirty-five dollars a week.

Isn't much, is it?

Five dollars more than the last place.

Well, isn't it difficult
to, uh, live on that sum?

Difficult perhaps, but I manage.

Hmm.

Uh, do you live at home?

No. I share a furnished apartment
with two other girls.

Well, how do you manage
to clothe yourself on your salary?

Many girls do it on less.

Dirty crowded basements,
bargain sales, make things yourself.

Mm. Presents, I suppose.

[chuckles] My Aunt Alice sent me
a nightgown Christmas two years ago.

Do you intend to get married?

I have no very definite ideas about it.

Well, the men who take you out...

You do have some friends?

I work very hard all day. Often at night.

My opportunities for meeting nice men
are very limited.

Sometimes, I doubt there are any.

And if I were interested in any man
I happen to know at the moment,

why... I'd hide that interest.

But your future?

It doesn't include a husband.

Good.

What did you say?

I have a proposal to make which may
brighten your future a little-- marry me.

What?

I said you could help yourself
by marrying me.

You're asking me to marry you?

Just that. You heard how Sheridan manages.

Well, I want some of the freedom
and security that he has.

And you'd have more money
than you have now, lots of nice clothes,

and a chance to travel.

Mostly travel.

Why, I thought perhaps
you'd like to travel.

So I would...

with my husband.

Oh, but you'd enjoy yourself.
You couldn't help it.

And you'd have all the lovely things--

That I've stood in front of shop windows
and wanted.

Exactly.

Well?

No, I can't do it.

A little while ago, I said I had no
definite plans about marriage,

perhaps I should have said
no one wanted to marry me.

Oh, now don't misunderstand me.

But I have an idea
of the sort of marriage I'd like.

I've thought about it often.

Oh, but this wouldn't be a real marriage.

It would be all the marriage I'd have.

And the marriage I've pictured for myself

doesn't start out with my husband
putting on a wedding ring with one hand

and handing me a railroad ticket
with the other.

Ah, I've hurt you.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I just thought that you'd look upon it as
merely... a better job.

I'm in an awful jam.

You would be doing me a great favor.

We can hardly take that into account.

It's getting late.
Won't you please finish your dictation?

[clears throat]

Oh, I can't work tonight.

I'll have to try
and get another postponement.

Well, then I'll go now.

- Good night.
- Good night.

Oh, uh...

sleep on it.

Perhaps you'll feel differently
in the morning.

I don't see how I can.

[sighs]

[yawns]

Did that guy keep you late again?

Not late.

It's midnight.

Yes, I know, but I've been walking.

Walking since 9:30.

Walking? Alone?

Yes. Trying to think.

Oh, what's the use?

None.

Did a man ever try and seduce you?

Good heavens! Sylvia, what happened?

Sylvia, what's happened?

Oh, don't get alarmed. Nothing's happened.

Then what are you talking about?

Something I had this morning
that I've lost.

My pride. My belief in myself.

[chuckles]
I knew I was no beauty, but I...

Wouldn't it be dreadful to be seduced?

Well, I've discovered
something infinitely worse.

Finding out that nobody wants to.

How did you find out that nobody wants to?

- I did.
- How?

- Stanton asked me to marry him.
- Oh!

He's in a jam.

And he took one look at me
and said I could travel... alone.

Well, what's wrong with that?

[chuckles]

If you ask me like that,
"What's wrong with it?" I don't know.

Hello, there.

Bobbie. Uh, Bobbie.
Stanton wants to marry Sylvia.

- What?
- Yes, it's on the level.

It isn't a pipe dream?

What do you think of that?

Gee, I'm glad somebody
around here gets a break.

Oh, Sylvia, it'll be a thrill
just thinking about you.

Buying clothes,
getting your hair and face fixed

so they look like something

and not worrying over the fact
that it costs half you make.

- But, Bobbie, I--
- Is he nice? Are you in love with him?

How'd it happen? Oh, say something.

What's the matter?

I used to think he was awfully nice.

He isn't.

No, I'm not in love with him.

And he's even less in love with me.

He just happens to need a wife.

What's the matter?
Is he going to become a father?

No. He wants to marry me
to keep from marrying someone else.

Oh, why can't I meet a guy like that?

He wants her to travel.
Live outside of New York, I suppose.

- Any strings?
- I don't think so.

He's not offering you marriage, deary.
He's offering you heaven.

Oh. Good morning.

Good morning, Mr. Stanton.

- I've been thinking.
- So have I.

Have you seen this?

Yes, I've seen it.

Well, are you going to help me out?

Well...

I can't see why you'd regret it.

Now, come. Sit down.

We'll draw up a sort of a rough contract.

Give us a better idea of what we're about.

We can do that.

Yes.

Um...

the, uh-- the marriage of Gaylord Stanton
and, uh, Sylvia Brenner...

is to stand for one year as per contract.

You see, you're not
tying yourself up for life.

Oh. Our marriage is to be different
from most.

[chuckles] Well, anyway, we won't have to
fight our way out of it. That's something.

Indeed it is.

Sylvia Brenner is to receive
$5,000 a year, paid in advance,

and may live wherever she chooses.

- Anywhere?
- Why not?

Sylvia Brenner will go by the name
of Mrs. Gaylord Stanton,

and, uh, will in no way blemish that name.

I know. Go ahead and say it.

It looked well in the contract.

Well, what do you say?

Yes?

Anything you want to add?

Well, there's-- there's just one thing.

It's rather difficult
to put in words. Well...

But, uh, this won't be a real marriage.

It'll be... Well, it's just a pretense.

I know.

We... You wouldn't expect, uh...

Well, uh, we'll be married in name only.

Oh, not in fact?

[laughs]
That's agreeable. [laughs]

- Why are you laughing?
- Oh, just at the way you put it.

Well, then, everything's settled.

Now, let's see, what are my engagements?

I'd like to make it today.
Would that be all right?

Yes.

I want to get out of town tomorrow.

Oh. I should dine at the Laceys' tonight.

Well, I can break away early.

Uh, suppose I pick you up,
uh, say, 10:30 tonight?

- Anything you say.
- Good.

Well, uh, I'll go now. Y-You don't mind?

No, no. Of course not.

Oh, uh, you better call up the agency
and get me another secretary.

- And, uh, stay and show her what to do?
- Mm-hmm.

I know a very confident girl
who might like the job.

Good.

Oh, uh, stop at city hall
and pick up a marriage license.

10:30 tonight.

Do you, Sylvia Brenner, take
Gaylord Stanton to be your lawful husband?

[Sylvia] I do.

And do you, Gaylord Stanton, take
Sylvia Brenner to be your lawful wife?

I do.

The ring, please.

Vested with authority,
I now pronounce you husband and wife.

And I wish you a long
and happy married life.

[mouthing words]

Thank you. Let's go.

[sniffling]

I'm sorry.

- I didn't mean to cry.
- Oh, that's all right.

Well, what are you going to do now?

Do? Why?

I suggest that you go abroad.
Say, to Paris.

- Paris?
- Mm.

Is, uh, that what you'd like?

Yes.

Why... I'd love to go to Paris.

I'm sure I'd be very happy there.

I'll arrange your passage
first thing in the morning.

- Don't trouble.
- Oh, it's no trouble at all.

You just call up my club.
They'll attend to it.

Thank you.

Drop me a line sometime.

Oh, uh, that contract.

Of course, it wouldn't mean anything
in a court of law.

It's merely our word of honor.

Don't worry. I won't trouble you. Ever.

I hope you'll be very happy. In Paris.

[music plays]

- You looking for a table?
- Yes. Please.

[mouthing words]

[music continues]

-[music stops]
-[applauding]

[new song begins]

[both speaking French]

Would you like to dance?

- Why, Mr. Durant.
- Well, this is splendid. Really splendid.

- I didn't know you were on the boat.
- Didn't you?

Do you remember where you did see me last?

At, um... Certainly. Um, at Stanton's.

Well, I'm a little surprised
that you do remember.

To forget you would be
an unpardonable sin.

- Shall we dance?
- Yes.

Pardon me.

Steward, find out the name of the lady
I'm dancing with. Quickly.

Yes, sir.

Shall we?

- Traveling alone?
- Yes.

[music plays]

Alone at last.

It's pretty noisy tonight, isn't it?

- Like to slip away?
- Mm, don't think we should.

I do. I've some things to talk over.
You know, legal things.

It'll wait.

I don't want them to wait.

- I'm going to get the divorce.
- Well, let's celebrate.

- Are you still happy?
- Yes.

I've something to celebrate myself.
My wife--

My wife sailed for Europe last night.

Well, isn't that grand.

Yes, I thought you'd be glad to know.

- What are you talking about?
- My wife, she sailed.

- Your what?
- Yes.

She'll be gone for months.
Isn't that swell?

Gaylord, are you joking?

About her sailing? Oh, no.

Not her sailing, her.
How could you have a wife?

Oh, didn't you know?

Where have you been keeping her?

Oh, um, she's been in, uh,
sanitariums and things. She's an invalid.

I don't know what to say.

About, uh, wives and husbands
and things like that?

Well, why talk about them?
They're not important.

Oh, no.

Tonight, there's just you and I and a
barrel of fun that's waiting to be tapped.

And perhaps tomorrow a headache.

Well, there's always a headache tablet.

[music ends]

[chattering]

Another bid for the last bottle?

[man] 175.

Do I hear 80?

-[man 1] 180!
-[man 2] 190!

Thank you. Another bid?
This is a lucky bottle.

200!

225!

250!

-[murmuring]
- Another bid?

-[raps]
- Sold to Mr. Durant for 250.

-[applauding]
-[chattering]

That's a lot of money
for a bottle of champagne.

Not when I'm assured
that you will help me drink it.

Thank you, madame.
You are very kind and generous.

- He should have thanked you.
- What fun would that have been for him?

- Fun?
- Yes.

When he said "kind and generous,"
he was thinking...

"Isn't she lovely?"

And so, the "kind and generous" was said
warmly, as if they were important.

- Well, aren't they?
- They should be.

But few people know other people
well enough to find out things like that.

You know what I mean?

Indeed I do.

To the lady who has made this
a lovely voyage.

May it continue after we disembark.

I have no comparison to make,
but I've enjoyed it.

Most women wouldn't be content for
the sort of... honeymoon you're having.

Why, I didn't mean to say just that.

How did you discover I was Mrs. Stanton?

I asked the steward.

He doesn't know the answers
to the other questions.

- Too bad. You've asked me millions.
- I'm sorry.

And very difficult questions.

I'm very sorry. I shan't ask you any more.

Look here. Why are you traveling alone?

Is it so unusual?

[chuckles]
That's a question, not an answer.

Once you intimated that you expected to be
in Europe indefinitely, alone.

Yes, I think it is unusual.

Certainly, if you were my wife,
it couldn't happen,

and Stanton isn't any cripple either.

Mm, you wouldn't have a wife.
Not under any conditions.

Think of the precautions you take
to ensure your freedom.

Is that your answer to getting married
and taking a boat trip alone?

To give Stanton some sort of protection?

He believes in married freedom.

And what does that mean exactly to you?

Another question.

I don't know the answer
to that one myself.

Now you're being mysterious.

I don't mean to be.

And, after all,
I am simply a married woman.

So were Helen of Troy and some others.

Why are you going to Paris?
[laughs] Oh, I didn't mean--

Oh, yes, you did.

I'm going for one thing.
The thing I go for every year.

Adventure.

And with eyes like yours,

you must know
there's only one sort of adventure

that adds very much to the total
of one's pleasant memories.

Well, I hope you find
what you're looking for.

I think I will.

Where do you intend stopping in Paris?

I don't know.

Is there a Martha Washington hotel?

[chuckles] No, I'm afraid not.

Let me reserve you rooms at the Cléon.

I'm sending a wireless for myself tonight.

- Well--
- Oh, you'd better.

It may be late when we get in.

And, if you wish,
you can change the next day.

All right.

[horns honk]

-[whistle blows]
-[horn honking]

[whistle blows]

[knocking]

Entrer?

[door opens]

Oh.

Good evening.

Tired?

Perhaps.

But I'm so excited I can't even notice it.

Are you pleased with your rooms?
They look comfortable.

Oh, they are comfortable. And beautiful.

They're not for me. Oh, yes.

Oh, no. You see,
I haven't very much money.

But your husband--

I know enough about him
to know that he can afford them.

I was his secretary.

[chuckles]
It isn't what you were, it's what you are.

Well, I'm still more or less
an employee of his.

He's increased my salary
but not enough for this.

Are you in love with him?

No.

- And don't ask me any more questions.
- I'm sorry.

- That's all right.
- You're tired tonight.

Tomorrow, you'll feel very differently.

I know, tomorrow,
you'll spend the whole day in shops,

beauty parlors and--

Oh, not that you need to.

But I know you will. It will give you
a feeling of courage, power.

Power.

Will you dine with me tomorrow?

Gladly.

And during the day, what?

You know what.

[speaking French]

But they're all so expensive.

Oh, no, madame.

Just have them on
when you show your husband the bill.

- All right, I'll take them.
- Oui, madame.

The stockings are
very superior quality, madame.

All right,
will you give me six pairs, please?

Of course, madame.

They make your feet much more interesting.

Not that they aren't, actually.

Of course.

- Oh, I like this one all right.
- Oui, madame.

[speaking French]

[women speaking French]

Madame, we should put a little more here.

- There?
- Oui, madame.

I am doing wonders for you, cheri.

Won't your husband be pleased
when he sees you?

[Sylvia] My husband is blind.

Well... he can feel.

But wherever are we?

In a nice, little villa
that I hope you will like.

- Little?
- Mm-hmm.

- Monsieur?
-[speaking French]

Merci.

- Shall we?
- Yes.

Oh, isn't it lovely?

I'm glad you like this room.
I hope you like the rest too.

I generally live here when I'm in Paris.

But this year I've decided not to.
I've made other plans.

Too bad.
The, uh, memories here will miss you...

even if you don't miss them.

Oh, I don't mean
that they shall be lonely.

Won't you live here while you're in Paris?

And, um, become a memory too?

But all pleasant memories.
And you can become what you choose.

Suppose I should become a...
an unpleasant memory?

You wouldn't. Not if you're happy here.

[sighs]

Sometimes, when you're not conscious
of anyone looking at you,

there's a look in your eyes
that is... positively sad.

I think I know why.

But you won't be forever on a honeymoon
that might as well be spent in a nunnery.

It hasn't been unhappy, this honeymoon,
as you insist upon calling it.

You could be happier. So much happier.

Well, so could most everyone.

Oh!

I'd love to live in a house like this.

I could do without the memories.

But this would be too expensive.

- How do you know?
- Well, wouldn't it?

It costs me nothing to let you live here
since I don't want to myself.

- Nothing?
- Practically nothing.

I have to keep it up in any event.

Is there any other reason
why you shouldn't live here?

There undoubtedly is.

But I can't think of it.

[tango plays]

[chattering in French]

[cheering, murmuring]

You're bringing me luck.

[man speaking French]

Won't you play for me?

Yes.

[speaking French]

[man speaking French]

[music plays]

[applauding]

[music continues]

[music ends]

[drumroll]

May I take a picture?

Is, uh, this to be sent home?

- Surely. It's for an American magazine.
- Do you mind?

No. On the contrary.

One moment.

[Grace] Indeed. Very ill.

Am I supposed to wait for her to die?

Let me tell you,
if Durant has her under his wing,

she's no invalid and you know it.

- Look at that.
- I am looking.

She looks very well.

Where have I seen her?

What difference does it make?

None.

Except, I suppose
she spends her spare time laughing at me.

I'd like to hear her just once.

[sighs]

Haven't you mooned
over that picture long enough?

You know what she looks like.

I wonder.

- When are you divorcing her?
- On what grounds?

Surely there's no harm in watching
an automobile race, even with Durant.

That's the only thing
that isn't grounds then.

Besides, they don't spend all their time
looking at automobile races.

-[man singing in foreign language]
-[piano playing]

[man] Very beautiful.

You've never been in better voice.

I'm sure you know why.

It takes two to create a love song.

You helped tonight.

The perfume of your hair,
the warmth of your eyes.

But more important still,
the unseen cup that passed between us.

I want to drink deeply. I want--

You should really write poetry.

I could... now.

You seem to know all the words.

Perhaps.

One can never discover you alone.

Could we step out for a moment and talk?

- Can't we talk here?
- Oh, I am not at ease here.

Are you sure I'd be at ease there?

- Je suis désolé.
-[laughs]

Sylvia, dear, before I forget it,

won't you come and spend July
with us at Biarritz?

- Well, I hadn't--
- I'll persuade you.

I have a pleasant surprise for you,
I think.

Good. Thank you.

She just asked me to stay with her in
Biarritz. I think she'll invite you too.

- She'd better, or I'll cut her heart out.
-[laughs]

Sylvia, can't we have
a moment alone together tonight?

- Why?
- Oh, don't ask me why.

Well, I don't suppose anyone would notice
if we stepped out in the garden a moment.

[piano plays]

[piano and violin continue]

Whatever in the world is the matter?

You see me alone most every day.

I know.

Has something happened?

Yes. An important something, or I
shouldn't have been so urgent about it.

I've thought about it often.

But tonight I heard someone say
something that...

crystallized my ideas on the subject.

Nearly everybody in that house

believes that you and I...

Well, that we're...
we're having an affair.

My dear, and you're afraid
I'll be hurt if I find out?

Don't worry.

My reputation isn't very important.

I'm sorry, of course.

But as long as it's sort of in other
people's minds and not in yours and mine,

I shan't be unhappy.

Now you've made it utterly impossible
for me to tell you

what I came out here to say.

And I thought I couldn't wait
another minute.

You'd better go in.
I'll follow after everyone else has left.

All right.

[piano continues]

I thought you'd forgotten me.

The others have been gone a long time.

You know I'd not forgotten you.

Sylvia.

Yes?

You know what I've made up my mind
to do tonight?

Ask you to become my...

What do you suppose
I think about when I leave here

night after night?

Oh, I can't pose as one of the Rover Boys.

I had only one regret
about the thing I heard tonight.

I regretted the fact that it wasn't true.

I may as well be truthful,
don't you think?

Yes.

I felt so restless lately
and, at times, positively useless.

I felt like that sometimes too.

Useless to myself and everyone else.

I'm sorry. I can't be different than I am.

Sylvia...

will you marry me?

I'm in love with you.
I have been for a long time.

Things can't go on like this.
Tell me, dear.

Tell me, what do I mean to you?

Oh.

Oh, what can I say?

You've made me very happy.

Happier than I've ever been in my life.

I could make you even happier.

Don't doubt me.

Oh, it isn't you I doubt. It's myself.

Well, let me worry about that.

That wouldn't be quite fair.

Let me be as fine to you
as you've been to me.

Let me think, and you think too.

Perhaps if I go,
you'll be very glad you're free.

Oh, Sylvia, don't, please.

You forget, my friend, I know you.

I've changed, almost as much as you have.

Have I changed so very much?

Only someone who hasn't seen you since you
left New York could realize how much.

Start getting a divorce tomorrow.

No. I'll start for New York tomorrow.

There's someone there I must see.

It can't be Stanton.

Sylvia, have you--

Have you a lover in New York?

One would hardly call him a lover.

Though I was terribly in love with him.

Are you now?

I don't know.

I must find out.

And the only way is to see him once more.

[horn blows]

[shouting, chattering]

[chattering continues]

Well, here we are in New York.

-[horn honks]
-[mouthing words]

- Annie!
- Sylvia!

- Sylvia, how are you?
- Oh, I'm so glad to see you.

Well, what's happened to you?
You're gorgeous!

That's not a happening, darling,
that's an accomplishment.

Tell me, are you glad to see me?

Gee, am I? But ought I to call you Sylvia?

Why not?

Well, you're not quite like her.

Don't be too sure.

- Tell me, how is, um...
- Oh, him?

Well, he's all right
if you like that type.

Shall I tell him you're here?

Sylvia-- Oh, Mrs.--
Mrs. Stanton, she's outside.

- Mrs., uh...
- Stanton. She's back.

Oh, show her in.

Go on in.

I hope you don't mind
my dropping in on you like this.

Mind? I'm tickled to death.

- Won't you sit down?
- Thank you.

- Well, when did you return?
- This morning.

Oh, why didn't you let me know?
I would have come down to meet you.

I hardly thought you would.

Oh, come now.
I was very busy when you went away.

Anyway, it's nice, your coming
to see me the day you arrive.

I have some things
I want to see you about.

Good.

I'm thinking of getting married.

What? But you are married.

Well, at least your year isn't up yet.

Oh, I see. Well...

I'll wait until the end of my year.

Oh, I didn't mean just that.

If you want a divorce, certainly.

It's just that, well,
I was rather taken by surprise.

Surprise?
Surprise that someone's in love with me?

Of course not.
It's just that I was sort of counting on--

But you're right. Your own happiness
is all that should matter to you.

You don't need me
for anything else, do you?

I do. Rather badly.

Don't tell me you've developed
too much sympathy for another woman

whose husband doesn't understand her.

It's the same one.

Mrs. Lawrence?
You are being very constant.

And a little ridiculous.

She says she's moving in to my apartment.

And you could move out.

Well, it would be very inconvenient.

And besides, nobody'd really
believe that I moved out.

And then there will be a row,
and I'll be in a mess again.

And if I don't get shot,
something worse. I'll have to marry her.

What? Again?

Do you really want to get rid of her?

I do.

Will you help me?

I have to, don't I?

No, you don't have to.

And I won't let you unless
you say... "I want to."

I want to help you.

Well, uh...

it'll be very simple.

You just arrived,
move your things into my apartment,

and take your lawful place beside me.

Just what do you mean by
my "lawful place" beside you?

Well, they'll all be there
for dinner tonight.

And you shall be there
as my adored and adoring wife.

And then, after they've gone--

I can return to my hotel.

Surely... if you insist.

There'd be no point in my staying.

- May I invite someone for dinner?
- Certainly.

Reginald Durant. You know him.

Yes. I've heard a great deal
about him lately.

No doubt. He does very interesting things.

Well, I'll be there by 6:00.
I hope everything works out all right.

It will when Grace sees
how lovely my wife is.

I'm sure.

Particularly, if we convince her
that we're very much in love.

I'll try very hard to be convincing.

W-Where did you stop
when you were in Paris?

Durant loaned me the sweetest little villa
you've ever seen.

- I haven't seen it.
- You must. Sometime.

We expect to live there.

Why are you marrying Durant?

Is there any reason why I shouldn't?

Have you noticed the ring he gave me?

- Don't you like it?
- No.

Besides, it hides your wedding ring.

Oh, I think the poor little wedding ring
has always wanted to hide.

I think it feels sort of useless.

Don't make a joke of our marriage.

Mr. Stanton, my almost former husband,
used to have a sense of humor.

- What's happened to it?
- Please call me Gaylord.

- Gaylord.
- Thank you.

You know, husbands and wives are supposed
to know each other's first names.

And as for sense of humor,

my former secretary,
Miss Brenner, wasn't especially gifted.

- I think you'd better call me Sylvia.
- Sylvia--

And it's really too bad you couldn't
have known some of the things I thought.

- They were quite funny.
-[doorbell buzzes]

That's probably Reginald.
He's generally early.

Well, you needn't be
so obviously glad to see him.

Why not if I am?

Oh, Sylvia, I wish nobody
were coming tonight.

- Just you and I.
- Yes?

I'd like to-- to...

to talk to you.

Good evening.

- I hope I'm not too early.
- Oh, no. No, indeed.

Glad to see you, Gaylord.

I missed you at tea this afternoon.
[kiss]

That's what love does to you.

It makes you terribly lonely,
no matter where you are...

if she isn't there.

[Gaylord] So I've heard.

I don't think you'd better
talk about love to Gaylord.

Men so dislike discussing things
they don't understand.

Will you excuse me a moment?

If she does marry you,
I hope she makes you very uncomfortable.

Thanks, but she won't.

She's the most gracious,
most charming, the best humored--

Yes, I know. I know.

I'm quite sure you don't,
but it doesn't matter.

But it was nice of her to come all the way
back here to settle things fairly.

Huh. You mean, uh, just to see you.

- Well, put it that way if you want.
- Well, she didn't.

She returned to New York to see someone
that she was once in love with.

She wasn't in love with anyone
when she married me.

Are you sure?

- Quite.
- I don't believe it.

- So let me tell you--
- I'm not interested.

You're not capable of knowing
anything about a girl as decent as Sylvia.

Ha! When did you turn angelic?
I married Sylvia, and as long--

[chattering, laughing]

While Grace is here, Sylvia is playing
that she's very much in love with me.

- Now, don't mess it up.
- Oh, well, I won't help you any.

Darling.

- Well, why so solemn?
- Oh, it's nothing. Nothing.

And look who's here.

Ponce de León and the Modern Crusader
rolled into one has returned.

- Just like old home week.
- Quite.

- Hello, Reggie.
- Hello.

- When did you get back?
- This morning.

- And you hurried right up to see papa?
- Yes.

Gaylord, does he know
they still print magazines?

- Hello, prodigal. Glad to see you back.
- Well, Richard.

[chuckles]

- He's not the main prodigal.
- What do you mean by that?

- Ah, it's a surprise.
- I don't like surprises.

Congratulations, dear.

Uh, thank you. What have you been doing
with yourself, Sheridan?

Don't bother him. He's suffering.

- With gout?
- No, mental cruelty. His wife left him.

[laughs] I thought her life was filled
with flowers and canary birds.

Uh, one of the canaries started to sing.

[all laughing]

Too bad, Sheridan. Too bad.

Yes, I guess you'd have to marry me now.

And a dirty shame.
It'll bust up a swell romance.

[all laughing]

Darling, what's the matter
with you tonight?

Oh, nothing. Nothing important.

Something's happened. I--

I'm sorry I was late dressing for dinner,
darling.

- Am I forgiven?
- Oh.

I only returned this morning. I can't
resist kissing him every now and then.

But, angel,
I don't know some of our guests.

Oh, of course. This is Mrs. Lawrence,

Miss Munson, and this is Greer.

[together] How do you do?

- Uh, Mr. Sheridan, I--
- Yes, I know Mr. Sheridan.

- Good to see you again.
- And Mr. Richards.

How are you and dear Mrs. Richards?
Well, I hope?

Unfortunately.

Hello, Reggie.

- You don't have to kiss him.
- Are you sure?

You seem to have recovered
your health, Mrs. Stanton.

Uh, yes, I, uh--

I'm sure it's a great relief to Gaylord
to know you're quite well again.

It must be--

I told Grace
all about your, uh, illness, dear.

- Oh, I see. You--
- He didn't say just what the trouble was.

Uh, well, um...
I suffered from, uh, heart trouble.

Is it curable?

Oh, yes. I had excellent care... in Paris.

Well, I think, dear, you could have been
taken care of just as well here.

Do you really think so?

Are you staying in New York long,
Mrs. Stanton?

[Sylvia] I'm not certain.

I needn't ask you,
because you'll have to go when she does

if you're to continue
to get into all the pictures.

He is bold coming here, don't you think?

Either that or just a bit foolish,
don't you think?

- I haven't thought.
- Well, you should. You really should.

I'd like to choke her, Gaylord.
Did you hear what she said to me?

- Hmm? About her health?
- Never mind her health. You heard her.

- Look at her. Well?
- Well, uh, what are you trying to tell me?

You expect me to know a woman like that,
you're mad.

- Is she married to you?
- Certainly.

You expect me to associate with a married
woman who's openly having an affair with--

Now, how do you know?

Whether she's your wife or not
is beside the point.

- What's she grinning about?
- I really--

- Have you told her you're divorcing her?
- I have no grounds.

Don't say that again. You tell her now.

I can't stand to see that silly grin
another minute. I want her to realize--

- All right, all right.
- You tell her before dinner.

All right.

Did you hear her?
"I don't know our guests."

Have you ever met such nerve?

"And how is dear Mrs. Richards?"

- She spoiled my whole evening.
-[laughs]

She hasn't spoiled mine yet.

Well, she will. That's what wives are for,
to spoil other people's evenings.

Why did you drag me into this alcove?

- Don't you see?
- No.

I've done everything I'm supposed to do.

I've pretended to be a loving wife and...

Oh, I wish they'd go home
and then we could discuss the divorce.

- Well, I won't divorce you.
- Then I'll divorce you.

Shh.

Look in the mirror.

- Oh, kiss me.
- I won't.

Please. You must.

Well, look as though you enjoyed it.
You promised.

[music plays]

Music.

Yes. Just to drown out my words

in case I happen to tell you
what I really think of you.

I just want them to see, not hear.

- Oh, they can see all right.
- They're staring.

My goodness. You know,
Grace looks funny with her mouth open.

- Oh, forget her.
- She's why we're here.

- Let's talk about ourselves.
- That would be interesting.

Did you think about me when you were gone?

No.

I never wanted to see you again.

Liar.

Ow!

Perhaps you're right,
but I love to stick you with pins.

I'm glad you're back.

Even with pins.

- Sylvia, darling.
- No, don't say anything.

Oh, I wish she'd go home. I'm tired.

Oh, Grace, what in the world has happened?

-[Richards] Calm yourself.
-[Grace] I'm sorry.

Don't get so excited. Please.

What's the matter?

I'm sorry. I'm-I'm nervous.

- It was an accident.
- Oh, it's quite all right.

[Martin] Dinner is served.

Shall we?

Could we wait just a minute?
I'd like to powder.

Certainly. Uh, ten minutes.

Very good, madame.

Will you come with me?

Please, don't trouble.
I know my way about.

I have no doubt.
But I've moved the powder.

Aren't you overdoing it a little?

You're making Sylvia very uncomfortable.

She's married to me.

You might remember
that I'm in love with her.

[music ends]

It does seem changed somehow.

I thought you'd notice.

- Lovely, isn't it?
- Very.

Isn't Gaylord thoughtful?
You know, when I came home,

he had all sorts of powder
and things here just for...

persons who happen to drop in.

Very thoughtful.

- You want there?
- In a minute.

By the way, what did you do
with the things you found here?

- Threw them out.
- You wouldn't?

But I would.

We'd better understand each other.

Do you know, I thought we did.

Are you going to divorce him?

No. On the contrary, I've forgiven him.

I think we have an excellent chance
to be very happy.

You've forgiven him.

Has he forgiven you?

You've been playing around with Durant.

I've heard things, I've seen pictures.

It isn't improper to be seen
in a picture with a gentleman.

I'm not ashamed. I don't care. I love him.

And I love him.
And I can keep you just where you are.

You'll never marry him because
I'll never let him divorce me.

Never! Do you understand?

Um, do you wish powder?

- I'd like gun powder.
-[chuckles] You'd like it perhaps.

But you're not fool enough
or courageous enough to use it.

I'm leaving!

I'll take everyone with me.
I'll ruin your triumphant dinner.

You know, I was hoping you would.

- Get my things and take me out of here.
- Oh, what's happened?

Plenty. Are you going to
take me out of here?

Oh, uh, Sylvia,
uh, Grace wants to know if we're taking--

Oh, if you do that, I'll-- Ohh!

Mrs. Lawrence,
haven't you forgotten something?

No!

[door closes]

I believe Mrs. Lawrence
did forget something.

She wished you all to leave with her.

- What?
- Not you.

After all I've meant to you,
if you had one spark of manhood--

- What's happened?
- None of your business.

Oh, you probably coached her.

I haven't the remotest idea
what you're talking about.

So she's an invalid. Huh!

- Are you coming?
- No.

Then you'll never see me again.

- Well, I'll try and bear up.
- Ohh!

-[Richards] Can you imagine?
- What's the matter?

Why, uh, Mrs. Stanton said that Grace
wanted us to leave with her.

So I do.

Mrs. Stanton wishes a nice, quiet evening
at home with her husband and her lover.

Sap!

This has all the earmarks

of a very pleasant evening
spent at home with Mrs. Richards.

Come on, dear.

You seemed to have accomplished
your purpose. Let's get out of here.

- Yes, but we haven't had dinner yet.
- Plenty of places for that.

I know, but, uh,
I have some packing to attend to.

Do you want to stay?

A little while.

You see, I have some things
I must talk over with my husband.

- Will it take long?
- No, not long. You send Gaylord to me.

- What about dinner, madame?
- Uh, later.

- Oh, you're still here.
- So are you.

Uh, we may not be dining for some time.

- In fact, we may call dinner off entirely.
- Indeed.

- We, uh, hate to inconvenience you though.
- Oh, how thoughtful of you.

There's some really charming restaurants
quite nearby.

Uh, yes. So Sylvia said. Thank you.

When she's put a few things together
and told you just what she thinks of you,

we'll dine in one of them.

[whistling]

[door slams shut]

-[door closes]
-[footsteps approaching]

- Sylvia.
- Yes?

- Sit down.
- No.

I have an awful lot I want to tell you.

I'm not so sure I want to hear.

Sylvia, do you love Durant?

I don't ask you whom you're in love with.

I'm going to tell you anyhow.

[Gaylord] It isn't strange at all.
It's very true and very real.

Why do you doubt me?

I can't help it.

Why?

You don't love Durant.

Are you in love with anyone?

Yes, I'm in love.

With me?

If I were in love with you,
it wouldn't be because you had a new suit.

- Oh, Sylvia, I--
- That's what it amounts to, isn't it?

You say you love me. How do I know you do?

Before I went to Paris, you...
Well, certainly, you...

- Were you in love with Grace?
- No. Nor she with me.

Why, love never even entered into it.

It's what you think of as love.

No, my dear, there was a time, but...

Oh, don't you see?

What you think of as love
is nothing more or less than...

well, an emotional hurdle race.

And what do you win?

You're the last hurdle.

And as long as I live,
you'll be the prize.

Will you please tell
Mrs. Stanton I couldn't wait?

I have a boat for Paris to catch.

Something I missed over there last trip.

- Beg pardon, sir?
- No, nothing. Nothing.

It's curious how attractive
a girl can be on a honeymoon

without a husband. [chuckles]

I must remember that.

- I know I shouldn't trouble you, but--
- What?

I was wondering about dinner, sir.

Oh. Oh, I shouldn't bother them tonight.

But, uh, they'll need a hearty breakfast.

I'm going to hold you closer
than you've ever been held before.

I've never been held close at all.

As far as my life is concerned,
it's been... been--

- Empty?
- Yes.

Sometimes I've been very lonely
and regretted it.

But tonight, I'm glad.