All language subtitles for El.Test.2022.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX]

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There are over 7 billion people
in the world.

But only two types of people.

Everyone can be divided
into two groups:

those who tame their impulses...

and those who let themselves
be tamed by them.

Those who can wait
and those who can't.

Winners and losers.

Let's see the candy test.

THE TE$T

Look, I'll leave you

-a marshmallow here.
-Yes.

And option one:

you can eat it now.

Or you can wait, and when
I come back I give you two.

-Okay.
-I'll be right back.

Which am I of those two girls?

You'll be wondering right now,
of course.

Because all of us, all of us,

are one of them.

So identical, yet so different.

But how are they different?

One has three things
that the other does not:

self-control, self-control and...

self-control!

15 cents a cookie.

-25.
-25 cents? We agreed on 15.

I got them from the machine,
they cost more than at Lidl.

Give me a euro's worth.

-Hi.
-Hi.

-Where were you?
-In the bathroom.

We'll be late to meet Grandpa.
Diarrhea again?

Then the cucumber sandwich
is no good for you today.

Lucky I brought an apple.
Have it in Grandpa's office.

Let's go.

Alba Risco invited me to her Communion.
Can I go, Mom?

No, honey, you're going to Zoe's.
And it's got a vegan menu.

-Cool, huh?
-Yes.

See you.

Paula, honey,

are signing up Inés for
theater group or camp this year?

We've got no money,
I told you, Carmen.

Anyway, I'll add you to
the parents WhatsApp group.

Add me, then I'll leave it,
like I do every year.

Okay.

-'Bye, Paula.
-'Bye.

The helmet's not compulsory.

I look like a mushroom
and it really itches.

You know what itches?
20 stitches on your scalp.

Come on, the helmet suits us...

...to a tee.

Why can't I go to the Communion?

Don't talk on the bike,

all the pollution goes
into your mouth

and gives you cancer.

Fuck!

-Dad!
-Hey, squirt!

-How was school?
-Alba Risco invited me to her Communion.

-Can I go?
-Sure... you can't.

Alba Risco's Communion or Zoe's.

It can't be both,
it's a lot of presents.

Do you have shares in Iberdrola?
I'll turn it off.

No, the light attracts the clientele.
The what effect?

-"Mosquito".
-That's right.

-How many mosquitoes bit today?
-13.

13 drinks on a Friday?

Rome wasn't built in a day.
Was it?

No.

-C'mon, we'll be late.
-Yes.

-Since when do you chew gum?
-Since I quit smoking.

Put this on, we're taking the girl
to my dad's office.

A shirt, no, Paula,
we're going to Toni's place.

But it's a new house
and an adults' dinner.

Let's dress like adults, alright?

Honey, what's this?

It's not hard, is it?

-Glasses are made of... glass.
-Glass.

-Good.
-Sure, there you go.

-Shall we go?
-Yes, let's go.

-Let's go.
-Move it!

Okay, I won't go to Alba Risco's
or to Zoe's,

-but I'm having my Communion.
-No.

-Why not?
-Because you have to believe.

Grandpa believes, Dad does
and I do too.

You believe in presents, right?

What about theater and camp?

Not a word about Communion
to Grandpa, not a word.

Hi, Paco!

-"Grandpa", damn it, "Grandpa".
-How are you, Dad?

I'd be better if my daughter
wasn't so modern

and let my granddaughter
do her First Communion,

as your mother would've wanted.

I baptized her for my mother:
quota filled.

I'll make you a proposition:

I'll open an account for her,
€50 a month until she's 18,

-if you let her do Communion.
-No.

-100.
-70, not a cent more.

-14 payments.
-Agreed.

-Get yourself a suit.
-How's the bar? Crap, huh?

Feel like watching
the game with Grandpa?

-Not really.
-Well...

Dad, she's to drink lots of water,
she's got the runs, okay?

When you get home, make her
some rice and off to bed.

Okay.

She has to eat this apple.
Do you have rice at home?

Yes, but we're not
going to my place.

We'll watch the football here,

then you can pick her up.

No, you should go to your place,

we haven't seen Toni in ages
and we'll be late.

Yes, well...

-What are you doing?
-Nothing. What would I be doing?

Are you staying here
in your office again?

Why not?
This place is just fine.

I've got my iPad for the football
and it's close to work.

A bit too close.

Sure, Paco. Retire already.

You've paid your contributions...
since the Pleistocene? That's enough!

Héctor, who'd make my payments?
You and your bar?

Speaking of the bar,
I wanted to tell you...

Not there, please.
Sit on the sofa.

Listen, I wanted to tell you
about some renovations...

You listen, Héctor.

You don't feed the dead,
you bury them.

I did some numbers
and keeping the bar open

costs you 240 euros a week.

Say yes and I'll get you
a buyer this morning.

Dad, the bar's not your affair
and you're not sleeping here.

Thank you.

You know what it is?

I don't miss her so much here.

I know, but you have to get out
and get some air.

You're sleeping at home tonight.
When we pick up Inés, I'll take you.

We'll talk about it.
Give Toni this,

it's his revenue. He's to sign it,

and tell him it's important
that he buys Chinese debt.

-All day talking about money.
-Chinese debt...

Honey, take her the apple, please.

Look at this treat
I've got for you, sweetie!

-No.
-Yes.

400 euros.

-The bar's not for sale, I said.
-Listen, I did the numbers.

415 euros is the alimony
you'd have to pay Héctor

-if you divorce him.
-Again?

-Your mother would've wanted it.
-Don't blackmail me, not now.

I'll pay the alimony
and you come to work here.

You'd make three time
your wages at the NGO.

Héctor's the love of my life.

Is that so hard to understand?

Do you want an honest answer?

No.

Listen to me,

the girl only has 8 years
until she turns 18.

8 times 14 payments,

are 112 payments.

112 payments times €70...

It's a lot of money, Paula.

Grandpa! May I?

No, if your mom finds out
I gave you pastries, she'll kill me.

She'll kill you if you give me pastries,
she won't let you hold my Communion...

Stand up for yourself, Paco.

In exchange for wearing
a nice dress and enduring mass?

No, dress and mass, no,
in exchange for my principles.

No donuts,
for being a smartie.

Just like I won't have Communion
because she says.

-What are you trying to do?
-Get something out of tonight.

We could finally sign the girl up
for theater.

Now you want her to do theater?

I just thought,
maybe you can sell the bar,

and buy a theater just for her.

Here we go about the bar again.

Fuck.

Are you going inside with the cap?
Take it off.

-Are you sure it's here?
-Yes.

-What did he get for the attic?
-Don't you dare.

-What?
-Ask him how much it cost.

-Why not?
-You don't ask those things.

-Friends, you do.
-Friends even less.

Holy shit, what a mansion!

Calm down, it's only money.

Look at that.

-Paulita!
-Gorgeous.

-Dude!
-You big jerk!

-What?
-What?

-What?
-What?

So, what do you think?

-What do we think?
-Yes.

-What did you get for the attic?
-No.

It got me these cars,
and the rest...

I used my time in London well,
I sold some... shares.

Dude!

With your father I saved heaps.
He's a great money manager.

-This year I got money back.
-I don't believe it.

Can you imagine?

What do you think?

Well, with two motorbikes
and two cars...

-at least one could be a hybrid.
-You're right,

but the pool is sustainable,
it's salt water.

-Come on.
-Makes up for it, right?

It's amazing. Amazing!

This looks like a mall,
it's so big and white.

A mall!

Wow, dude. Look, look!

Look, one of those things
that cleans by itself.

-It won't fall in the water, will it?
-Come this way.

And this is a... normal kitchen.

-Fuck, normal...
-You bastard!

Just like ours, right, honey?
The same.

What do you want me to say?
We're happy for you.

-Hey, it's your home.
-Thanks.

-Then give me a key.
-Piss off!

Come here...

-Hear that?
-What?

-Shit.
-How did it get up here?

I've got 6, two per floor.
One vacuums, the other wipes.

What's in there
that smells so great?

A leg, a shoulder... well, two.

Lamb. You'll love it
And for Pauli,

this "hunk of plaster",
is some tasty tofu.

-It's delicious.
-Totally.

This ham looks nice.

-Wait...
-Eh, Paula!

-No! What's this?
-Magic!

It's the previous owner's thing,

One clap turns it off,
two turn it on.

-No...
-I don't know how to disable it.

It's awesome!

-But...
-That's enough, eh?

Asshole!

300 a bottle. How much would
a glass be in the bar?

How's the bar going?

-A trainwreck.
-Getting by. Fuck, Paula...

-Weren't gin and tonic nights a hit?
-Terrific,

until a cocktail bar opened
across the street.

We're assessing a handover
in case anyone's interested.

No, we're not assessing anything.

When I do extensions,
the bar will bounce back.

I've told you over and over,
if you need money,

for the mortgage, the bar,
whatever, I'm here, please.

Thanks, but we'll make do. No.

No.

Hey, where's our flat,
more or less?

-Your flat?
-No, our flat,

-our home.
-Hey!

-It was Cruz St...
-Nº 22. Attic, no lift.

-There.
-83 steps.

-82.
-That's it, 82.

Give it to him.

-What? What's this?
-We got you this silly thing.

-There was no need.
-It's silly, for the house.

-Hold this for me.
-Yes.

-You'll freak.
-Let's see...

-Terrible, look at me. My God!
-What?!

You've always been gorgeous.
I look awful with short hair.

The backing vocals those chicks did
when we sang in the park...

That's why I noticed you guys.
Well, you, Toni.

-You always scored with that guitar.
-It didn't work with you.

Exactly.

What was that song
you were playing when we met?

Fuck, yeah. A great tune.

-To be happy, I want a truck.
-That's it.

Spitting on the humans,
feeling up my girl.

To be happy, I want a truck.

-25 years, just like that.
-Half a life, dude.

I gave you 25 pesetas
that day, remember?

Fuck, 25, with the hole in the middle.

-And look at you now.
-Well, it's not so...

-Listen, buddy. To you, champ.
-Yes, go on.

To us.

-Hey, "Be-bop"!
-Yes.

An asshole leaves a drop!
Let's go!

-You don't drink it like this. Anyway...
-Shall I open another?

No, I'll get the one upstairs.
The stairs are good for my butt.

You're so silly.

-Hey, put on some music.
-Got it.

-Alexa, music.
-Putting on music.

The robot can get that.

They're so bad, really.

Listen, Inés.

I'm pissed off that they won't
let you have First Communion.

-Mom's principles.
-No, I know.

Look what I've got here.

This medal was your grandma's.

She'd have loved you to have
Communion and given you this.

Like it?

Not as much as the cake I'd get,
but yes.

It you had First Communion,
you'd get a three-tier cake, but...

We renounce our will
for the principles of others.

Please tell me you read that
in some book, because...

-you're scaring me.
-On a book sleeve.

You read it on a book sleeve?
Just as well.

If your grandma saw you
so smart, so big...

Really, you're the same.
Two peas in a pod.

-Dad says I take after him.
-Your father's a dickhead.

Sorry, I mean, he has
different opinions. It's fine.

-Can I have some donuts now?
-No.

You can't imagine how much
I missed you guys.

We missed you.
Hey, what about her?

Huh?

Berta, did you miss her

all the time you were
in London alone?

Yes. Why?

No reason. It's just that
there's only one toothbrush.

One toothbrush?

When I went to piss,
there was only one toothbrush.

She's not moving in here, huh?

I've always been
straight-up with Berta.

You know I like living alone.
"Living apart together",

that's a basic concept for me.

No, seriously. But...

she said I bought this house to share.

Fuck that! Share it with me!

Hello!

-Yeah! Coming!
-Come up, I've got expensive wine.

Okay!

What are you doing?

-That "mambo" thing will...
-Fuck that. Pick it up.

Okay, relax. That's it.

When Berta comes,
not a word about moving in.

Not a word to Paula.

Disgusting, dude.

Taming your primary impulses

and keeping a cool head

when making major life decisions.

That's the key to success, that's it!

Five bins. Great.

One candy, two candies.

But now we'll go beyond.

This doesn't go here, it's plastic.
Plastic is yellow.

Are you ready to find out
what kind of person you are?

Always the same thing.

Are you ready to find out

what kind of person you are?

Yes!

No, no, no.

"Doctor Berta Celaya".

So important.

If you were given the choice,

what would you choose?

€100,000 now...

Come on!

... or a million...

in 10 years?

So...?

100,000 now, right now,

or a million in 10 years?

Neither, because I'm up to here
with talking about money.

But it's a game, a personality test.

Choose, it's a simple question.

-It's an indecent question.
-Indecent?

Measuring people on the basis
of money? Seriously?

Everyone wants money.

"Everyone wants money", no.
Everyone needs money.

There you go.
What do you say?

If I answer, if I choose
one of the two options,

you don't mention money
all night. Yes?

Yes.

Swear.

I swear.

100,000 would sort out my life.

I'd pay off debts,
and the mortgage, finally.

Extracurricular activities, my girl
could go to camp and do theater.

And I'd have some leftover
for a whim, a trip...

to Nicaragua.

Nicaragua?
Are there good beaches?

I'd go with the NGO.
It's my thing.

Well, the 100,000 then.

Yes.

No, no. I don't know.

-Toni, Berta's...
-It's like...

-Sure.
-Watch it.

I don't know. It's hard because
a million is a million.

That's for sure.
But 10 years is a long time.

That's the dilemma.
Berta says the key is self-control,

the ability to wait.

Guys, it didn't look like it,

but we're going to get a downpour.

-No shit.
-A big one.

Yeah, yeah.

-You don't have a dilemma, huh?
-Dilemma?

What do you prefer?
100,000 euros in your hand now

or a million in 10 years.

No fucking dilemma.
100,000, straight away.

You're a bird in the hand...

-And held hard, so it doesn't fly.
-That's it.

Berta's dilemma isn't an innocent
question, it's a personality test.

-Right, and?
-The test defines who you are.

Right, and?

Before answering, certain things
have to be assessed.

Assess what, Paula?

To start with, the main thing:
the origin of the money.

-Who's putting up the money?
-It's hypothetical money.

-Sure.
-Is it fair trade hypothetical money?

-Very fair.
-Okay.

It's not from a bank
or a savings bank, they both suck.

Please! Never.

Okay, nor does it come from
a speculator like you, right?

Jeez.

-She's such a pain.
-Paula, the money's clean.

-An altruist puts it up.
-Define "altruist".

Those who donate to
your NGO, for example.

You donate to my NGO
as a tax deduction.

-Or whatever.
-But you take his dirty money.

No, sorry. In my NGO
his money's anything but dirty.

Whatever. You accept money
from a speculator, me.

Why? Because we all have
a price. Full stop.

The typical capitalist, liberal,

asshole comment, forgive me.

-Thanks.
-You're welcome.

So if I won the lottery tomorrow,

you wouldn't accept the money, right?

The lottery is like Communion,

it's not about money,
it's about principles.

Look, honey, your principles

may fill the fridge with tofu
and seaweed, fine,

but making me miss out
on some fat cash...

If it's dirty, I wouldn't take it,
even if I lived under a bridge.

Alright, Paula,

100,000 euros falls from the sky
and you wouldn't take it?

Toni, I devote my life
to fighting injustice

and it all has the same origin:
money

I'd never accept dirty money, ever.

I swear on my daughter.

It's easy to refuse money
that doesn't exist.

Why are we talking about
money again? Please, enough.

Where here for dinner, right?

-We're here for dinner...
-Yes, I'm hungry.

The dance the kids do.

Besides, you know it's useless.

It's impossible for someone
like you to understand me.

-Someone like me...
-Someone like you, yes.

You sleep soundly knowing
that your suit was made

by a kid in Bangladesh working
16 hours in semi-slavery,

for example.

Vietnam. And if I don't buy
this suit, the kid starves.

Fuck.

-No, it's...
-No, fuck.

You know what I hate
about that argument?

In the photo, when I gave you
25 pesetas, you were different.

That Toni was so different.

That Toni took too many
toxic substances.

-Lollipops!
-Yes, you got wasted,

but that Toni believed
in a better world.

All that Toni wanted was to get
into your pants and have fun.

You're right.

-Quite a comedown.
-Fuck. Cut it out, babe.

-Okay.
-You think you're better than me.

-No.
-Yes. A little.

-I don't think I'm better than you.
-I think you do.

The difference between you and me

is that I haven't forgotten
what kind of person I am.

Excuse me.
You have to let it breathe.

It's a gran reserva, it's been asleep
for 11 years. You have to wake it up.

The "Be-bop" was fun, but...

it's 1800 for a crate of 6.

Excuse me a moment.

-Did I go too far?
-Hey!

-The ham thing...
-We're adults, it's all on the table.

But you don't have to
always be sermonizing.

-He started it.
-No, honey.

Honey, it's fine.

What's this?

€100,000 in the name of
Paula Calvo Gijón.

Bullshit on a stick!

What are you doing, Toni?

Putting you in a dilemma.

€100,000 in your name.

You can deposit that check
right now at any ATM.

If that's what you prefer, of course.

You're kidding, right?

If I prefer it to what?

To waiting 10 years
and making a million euros.

What the fuck.
Tony, what the fuck...

-Why put me on the spot?
-What spot?

My money's beneath you.

Tear up the check,
we drink the bottle, the end.

I just swore on my daughter
I'd never take money

from someone like you, ever.

And you shove 100,000
in front of my face.

100,000 euros that'll
sort out your life, excuse me.

No one's going to die
because you take that money.

You bastard.

Well,

instead of insulting me,
you could thank me.

Bro, I'm grateful, deeply,

forgive me for going on
about it, but is this real?

It's totally serious.

However,

on one condition.

It's the least I can do.
Whatever you say, bro.

Paula decides.

You jerk...

Paula.

Paul, honey, look at this.
Read it: €100,000.

And tomorrow,
Inés signs up for theater...

What are you doing?
No, no, honey.

-Paula, damn it...
-Do you never skip your principles?

Never.

-You've never been to McDonald's?
-I don't know what they smell like.

The other day she found
a McDonald's receipt in my pocket.

She made me sleep on the sofa.

Héctor, you own a bar
and you eat at McDonald's.

-Tell me how we pay off the loan.
-The loan for the bar?

My money's no good for you,
but the bank's is?

An ethical bank.

-Eh?
-An ethical bank.

With the interest from my loan,
my savings bank creates housing.

-Ethical bank, honest profit.
-Shitty profit.

You know what I get
from my electric company shares?

-10,000 per trimester.
-Dishonest profit.

True, they set the prices,
boycott renewables,

they don't give a fuck
if the poor die of cold...

They're criminal, yes or no?

-Absolutely.
-What do you use at home, candles?

LEDs, they're more expensive,
but more sustainable.

Who lights up the LEDs,
the Holy Spirit?

"We are energy".

-"We are energy"!
-What?

"Green consumption co-op,
non-profit.

100% clean energy".

Great, very clean, very green,
but does it to this?

-Alexa, colored light.
-Putting on colored light.

-Fuck.
-Take that! Colored light.

-Colored light!
-Very nice.

-Alexa, normal.
-Putting on normal light.

The car, the car.

Héctor's Mustang, yes. What?

30 years and gas. The worst thing
for people and the planet.

-I sold it cheap to my father-in-law.
-No shit.

-The Mustang.
-Yes, obviously, because on foot,

bike or public transport
you can go anywhere.

You're ridiculous, Paula.

Well, a fantastic evening.

-Good night.
-Paula...

Toni, you went too far.
Paula... Where are you going?

To get Inés. Come if you want.

-Paula, honey, listen.
-And this? "I'll never get a mobile.

I swear on my daughter..."
To make these mobiles,

your Third World refugees
work in inhuman conditions,

all so that you can post
your photo eating paella

-and send a smiley face.
-Fairphone.

-What?
-Fairphone!

Fairphone. Fair, phone.

Together: "fair phone".

Zero coltan, responsible with
people and the environment.

All the men and women
who made my phone

did so in decent conditions
with a fair wage.

And it's certified.
Has it "woken up" yet?

Toni, listen, don't fight it.
She'll floor you. Throw in the towel.

We even have Internet access

from a co-op that, get this,

fights for sexual equality!

-So, it's....
-And?

Equality and that crap,
but try downloading a movie!

Sit and wait.

-Since when do you pirate movies?
-I don't pirate them,

I share with other users,
which is very different.

When do you watch these movies?

Downtime at the bar.

You must be
a fucking film buff by now.

That'll do, eh?

Before, I'm not paying off the loan

because of the bar.

Coming here, the girl
won't be doing theater

because of the bar.

Yesterday, the girl's not going
to camp because of my bar.

All the misfortunes of this family
are the fault of my bar.

You said it, now I don't have to.

You want the girl to do
extracurricular activities?

It's very easy: take the job
at your dad's consultancy.

You'd make triple what
you make at the NGO. Triple.

Open it, please, it's heavy.
It's a rich folks' door.

-It really is heavy.
-Sure, so the little lord

can keep his shitty bar,
I give up my principles, right?

That's the problem,
these fucking principles.

A little less of them and the girl
would do theater, go to camp

and she wouldn't have to
do afternoon snack deals...

-What?
-Nothing.

What?

What's this about afternoon snack?

Héctor.

-The meeting with the teacher...
-Yes, I couldn't go. What?

She said the girl spends her money

buying snacks from her friends.

But why? I take her a snack
every afternoon.

Sure, but the girl can't live
on spelt wheat, Paula.

I don't know why the teacher didn't
tell me, I talk to her every day.

The same reason she didn't
want you at the meeting.

Why didn't she want me
at the meeting?

Because there's no talking
to you, Paula.

That's why.

I'm going there to cry for a bit

and I'll be right back, okay?

-Berta?
-Amore, sorry.

Hi. It ran late, a line formed
for me to sign...

the books.
The director's happy.

The 9th edition is selling like hotcakes.
Can you image a 10th? OMG.

-Everything alright there?
-Uh-huh.

Really, I'll be here
maybe half an hour.

-I'll hurry there when it's over.
-Uh-huh.

How's Paula?
Has she changed her hair?

Uh-huh.

I told you, it's obvious,
Psychology 101.

Really, when it's over,
I'll hurry there.

-I love you.
-I love you loads.

Me too. Ciao, ciao.

Doctor, one second.
Can you sign...?

-Yes. Self-control, wait your turn.
-Yes, self-control.

-Thank you for coming.
-Self-control.

I'm already very tired.

Very tired.

Of never making ends meet,
our backs against the wall,

checking the current account.
I'm sick of it.

This is our chance, honey.

-This fixes it all.
-Paula,

think that I'm returning a favor.

Without you, I couldn't have
gotten my inheritance.

You gave me what little money
you had to me to pay the taxes

and get my parents inheritance.

I owe it all to you...

Not all of it but, basically,
I owe it all to you.

Paula,

do it for the girl.

One question...

€100,000, what's that in pesetas?

16,638,000 pesetas.

-Fuck, how do you know that?
-I looked it up on my mobile.

With that money we'd pay off
the mortgage and have a bit left.

-Honey, don't joke about this.
-I'm not joking.

Maybe you're right, there's no need
to be militant 24 hours a day.

-No, but wait...
-I love you. No, I love you.

-I'm getting my jacket. I'm going.
-No, no. Where are you going?

To the ATM. Unless I see
those zeros tonight, I won't sleep.

What if I don't want this check?

It's crumpled,
the machine won't read it.

Do you have Bizum?

Honey, it's better to wait 10 years.

What? 10 years?
Are you listening to yourself?

Please, who can wait 10 years?
What are you doing?

Like you said, I'm thinking
about the girl.

She wants to do theater now.

In 10 years maybe she'll want
to start a haberdashery or...

-Toni, if I decide to wait 10 years,...
-Yes.

...what guarantee do I have
that you'll give me the million?

I'm a bit offended
that you doubt my word.

5 minutes ago I handed you

a check for 100,000 euros.

Exactly, the 100,000,
the check, is real.

-Do you want it in writing?
-I want a contract.

A contract?

-Yes?
-I need your help.

Remember I told you
about Berta's test?

Yes. "€100,000 now
or a million in 10 years"?

Exactly. Imagine it was
a real situation.

What do you mean, real?

Imagine that someone chose

to wait 10 years for the million,

but wanted a contract.
What would I have to put?

-Toni.
-Yes?

Did you offer my daughter
and Héctor a contract for a million?

Your daughter. But she's wary
and wants a contract.

Could you draft it for us?

A million in exactly 10 years.

It just needs your signature, then mine.

I can't waste 10 years
thinking that if I croak...

-I won't see the million.
-Not you, but the girl will.

No, the girl... What?

With a million she'll never need
to get a mortgage.

For her, that's half a life.

You'll make me
wait 10 goddamn years,

then throw away the million
on a flat for the girl?

Is that what you're saying?

Sorry, you mean our daughter?
Wash your mouth out.

-I'll wait in the kitchen.
-No, you don't have to go.

This is fucking awkward,
for me I mean. So...

We'll talk over there.

-Héctor, come.
-Paula.

I can hear just as well here.

The walls, the open concept,

you hear everything in this house.

Paula, this decision

can change our lives.

You should think about us.

I'll buy the place next door,
renovate it, the bar...

will bounce back and we're
out of the hole. Trust me.

We've had the bar for 3 years
and not one quarter in the black.

Trust you how?

The same way that you
asked me to trust you?

When what happened, happened,

you asked me to trust you,
didn't you?

Héctor, please.

Who cares?
Toni knows everything.

Toni.

-Héctor.
-Paula, please, honey.

Who else do you think
I drown my sorrows with?

With him, of course.

Friends, I don't want to witness
this conversation,

so, just as I came, I'm going.

When I told you that Paula
had cheated on me,

-what did I tell you?
-Don't involve me. Héctor.

When we were drunk as skunks,
what did I say about her?

-That you believed in her.
-Exactly.

I believed in you, Paula.

And you didn't...

give me many reasons.

You brought that refugee home.

I gave him a roof, food,
a bed, my trust.

It's fine. You told me
it meant nothing to you?

Then it meant nothing.

Well, now I'm asking you
to trust me.

Paula, honey, trust me.

Look, guys,

this is getting too complicated.

Berta will be here soon.
I want us to have a quiet dinner.

-A coin. I want a coin.
-No one's listening to me.

Heads, the 100,000,
tails, the million.

-What are you doing Paula?
-Yes, yes.

Toni, say something to her.

A coin for what?
I don't have any coins.

Paula, what are you doing?

If you leave something
this important to chance,

you can end up making
the wrong decision.

-Sure, but the coin's wrong, not me.
-Up to you.

-A big house, and one little coin...
-What's wrong with it?

Nothing.

Heads, 100,000,
tails, a million. Okay?

-Go on.
-I'm doing it.

-Aren't you getting it?
-Whoever tosses it, gets it.

-I don't believe it.
-Wait, stop.

-You klutz.
-Is my arm that strong?

Tails. Shit!

-Héctor, do you see it?
-No.

Alright then.

Fuck, what a night.

Didn't you see I'd stopped?

-Cars are going by.
-The shrink.

Now it'll hot up, you'll see.

-You should've crossed, miss.
-But it's not a Stop sign,

it's a Give Way:
"give way if you want to".

Sure, but no one was coming.
Your way was clear.

Exactly, to do what I felt like
and I felt like stopping.

-José, she's right.
-Berta!

-Are you alright?
-Fine. This officer...

-Good evening.
-Good evening.

... insists that I should've
jumped the Give Way.

Give Way signs
are made to jump, miss.

-José's right.
-Who are you, Jiminy Cricket?

Listen, I think...
No one's injured,

there's no major damage.
We'll fill in the form...

-No?
-He's to apologize to me.

Why not just fill out the form?

Officer,

have you ever wondered
why you became a police officer?

Berta, this isn't the clinic.

-Sorry.
-Amore... Let him answer.

Have you ever wondered

why you need such a big gun
in your belt?

How about we deal with this
like adults?

You're barking up
the wrong tree there.

That's it. Registration.

No, come on...

We've got a dinner here.

"Celaya".

Dr. Berta Celaya. From the radio?

Yes, and TV. 3 channels.

We listen to you every day.
Well, on patrol.

-You were fucking great today.
-Thank you.

Jose called you on the radio once,
to get some advice.

Do you remember?

-No. Obviously not.
-It was about a year ago.

-No, no.
-You changed my life.

Why? What did I advise you?

You'll laugh, but...
he left his wife for me.

OMG!

-Mind if we take a photo?
-Yes, of course.

-Do you mind...?
-No, sure. Delighted.

-Hold on. That's it, there.
-Let's see.

-ID card?
-Thanks.

-Alright...
-Lose the hat.

Oh, sure. Terrific.
With the car, wonderful.

There we go.

It's going to rain, we should...

-We also have to...
-Thank you so much.

We'll talk again.
We have outstanding issues...

Dinner...

No.

-Dinner.
-Dinner.

-You brought up the check, bro.
-Héctor... Please, man.

-She wants to meet you.
-I'd walk, eh?

Alexa, lights on 10.

-I'll get a bottle of wine.
-Putting lights on 10.

Amore.

-Yes?
-I'm staying overnight, okay?

You haven't moved in yet?

No. I think it's important

in a couple for everyone
to have their space.

There's space here alright.

Alright...

I'm going for a cig... You start.
I can't find my smokes.

You relax.

DON'T LISTEN TO HIM,
TAKE THE MILLION

Who is it?

Go on, eat. Don't wait for me.

It's work. I have to answer.

Goddamn...!

So, how are you doing?

-Super.
-Super?

-What did you do?
-Nothing, the mansion...

It looks nice, doesn't it?
He still has lots to do,

but it's really nice.

And really big.
You almost need a sherpa.

A sherpa, she says!

What's wrong?

You're all quiet, eyeing each other,
doing strange things...

-What happened?
-I don't know.

-Tell me.
-Héctor,

come with me to heat up the tofu.

Honey, tofu takes a second
in the microwave.

Come along, I need the bathroom
and I don't want to get lost.

-Come on.
-The bathroom. Okay...

-the bathroom.
-Amore.

Yes?

It's fine. Well, something
is always happening.

Life is things happening.

You know, we've got
several copies of your book...

You know very well,
I like giving away your book.

We had one in the kitchen
and they found it.

We started talking...
I don't know,

and I offered a check
for 100,000 euros,

but she may prefer the million.

Daddy again?

-Honey, it's a million!
-Sure, I know.

Maybe I went a bit nuts.
I don't know what I was thinking.

I know what you were thinking.

You do too,
even if it's unconsciously.

Hey, I stopped being
your patient some time ago.

Don't treat me as if
I still am, because...

When you realize why
you offered them all that money.

What? Never mind.

What? What?

Paula said something before...

that really hurt me.
A lot, really.

I'm here, talk to me,
I'm your partner.

She told me that when we met,

-when I played on the street...
-Played what on the street?

Music. Hector and I played together
on the street. It's how we met her.

She told me that 25 years ago
I was better than I am now.

How cute.

What?

She said that 25 years ago

I was better than I am now.
It got to me.

Anyway... You know?

Here he is again! Calling again!
But don't forget one thing...

Here... you decide.

Not... You.

"Raise ravens..."

Paula will choose what he says.

"Submissive meets sadist",
it's textbook stuff.

Héctor won't stop until
she chooses the 100,000.

He's already doing it,
he brought up the refugee.

-Emotional blackmail.
-It was ages ago.

It'll end badly,
and it'll be my fault.

It wouldn't do them any harm
in the end.

I'm the only one who thinks
they'd be better apart.

Paula will never be happy
with Héctor, ever,

because Paula could be happy
with only one person.

Please, not this again, Berta.
That's enough!

When you lived together, sparks...
I was your psychologist!

-Well...
-I know all about you.

So you should know that those sparks
went out over 20 years ago.

"Where there was fire..."

25 years ago Paula chose Héctor
because at the time

you didn't want any commitment.

Paula chose the easier option,
she chose the 100,000,

and she unconsciously regrets
not choosing the million.

Long term investments
are the ones that are worth it.

I love you, you know?

Me too.

Now relax and go back inside
subtly, elegantly,

-when we see they're not talking...
-Hey!

Are we having dinner or what?

Come here. Come here.

Gesture or shout,
you don't have to do both.

Please, let's have a quiet party.
Please.

-I'm fine, but we'll see about him.
-Come on.

Yes.

-Things are to go smoothly, please.
-No, I'm fine. I'm fine.

I love you, eh? Don't forget it.

Here I have...

a first-rate beluga caviar,
they're eggs.

You don't... Well...

You have salad.
Shall I bring you the tofu?

No, I'm fine, I can wait.
I'll eat some bread.

Paula, new hairstyle?

Well, it's...

bangs and longer hair.
You barely notice it.

You do notice it, a lot.
Isn't that right, amore?

You change your hair a lot.
Why?

Do you go to the hairdresser much?

I don't know. The usual, I guess.

You got a perm at Christmas.
Weren't they curls like...?

Like pubic hair, yes.

And then red, shoulder length.

-Straight and red.
-Like a Playmobil.

And it was long.

-Like the urban legend girl.
-It looks good. I like it.

-Thanks.
-But you change a lot. Why?

Berta, honey.

Give it a rest.
Life isn't a couch.

Yes, it is, amore.
Much more than you think.

What's it going to be,
the 100,000 or the million?

-Who won?
-Forgive me.

Well...

It's best to get it over with
once and for all.

Well?

What did you decide?

No-thing, because this
is getting out of hand.

-You didn't decide anything?
-I decide to not decide.

-Are you sure?
-Yes, Toni. We've come...

-For dinner.
-... for dinner...

-and to spend time together...
-Terrific.

And that's what we'll do.
So, please serve the dead lamb.

I'll get your tofu first.
Do I microwave it?

-Microwave, never.
-Terrific.

How long do you leave tofu?

Alexa, music for happy gatherings.

-Music for happy gatherings.
-Finally, the lamb,

which I think looks fabulous.
Please, make room.

-Yes.
-And the aroma... Anyway...

Poor thing. It has a mother.

-How's yours?
-You worked hard on it.

Thanks.

Let's take it easy.
Give it a minute and...

go for it. Enjoy.

-Man, I didn't tell you...
-Yes? What?

They're opening a metro station
near the bar, almost in front.

-Seriously? That's great.
-Cut it out, okay? It's over.

What? I'm talking to my buddy,
telling him normal stuff...

Sure, but...

Paula's right, the bar's doomed.

Without the renovations
I have in mind,

it's doomed, kaput.

Shall I get some wine?

There's wine here.
I don't want any more.

Sure.

The place next door, now that's

right in front of the metro.
Right in front.

Héctor, stop, okay?
I'm not taking that check.

That ship has sailed.

-I think the ship's still there.
-Didn't you want a quiet dinner?

-Yes, as well.
-Then leave the ships alone.

-Maybe there are two ships.
-As well.

Paula, feel free.
Choose the course you want.

-I do feel free.
-The check...

Is the best thing, Paula.

The best thing?
Didn't you say that

when you signed the mortgage
in yen instead of euros?

-True, I did say that.
-He said that.

Because you knew that the euro
was going to plummet, right?

-Berta, that was bad luck.
-Bad luck, eh?

The mortgage was bad luck,
the cocktail bar in front...

It's all bad luck.

Berta, we're having dinner,
chatting, exchanging ideas...

-Sure.
-It's all good, it's great.

What are you insinuating, doctor?
Enlighten us.

You chase your luck.
If I were you, I'd run faster.

Paula and I are carrying
a heavy pack, you know?

You try running with
a 10-year-old girl in your arms.

Héctor's right, the check is better,
we really need that money.

-Honey, you're shitting me.
-Really, forgive me.

I thought you'd come for dinner.

I did too, but your book appeared

-and it ruined the evening.
-No, great, really.

-That's it, no more dilemma.
-That's it.

-It's over.
-Bravo.

-Bravo!

-Drink.
-Hey, let's toast!

-No, I don't want any.
-No, come on... Forgive me.

It's all sorted.

Toast. Toast with me, bro,
for God's sake.

Come on.

-Toni.
-Berta.

Hello.

Did I ever tell you the parable
of the identical twins?

Fucking hell!
Does this girl never give it up?

No.

No, let's have dinner.

Yes, Berta, keep those parables
for the radio,

people love them.

The parable will help Paula
to decide which ship to get on.

-I want to hear the parable.
-You do? Let's hear it.

In the 9th edition

we expanded this chapter
as a nod to the readers.

We also changed the look a little,

with more photos of you
on the front, the back, inside...

It goes: "Once upon a time...

Sorry, I'm taking the lamb away
because it's better...

-when it's hot.
-Good idea.

"Once upon a time there were
identical twin sisters,

three years old, the same.

Both had the same education,
the same family affection,

the same opportunities.
They were exactly the same.

One day the parents agreed
to participate

in a psychological experiment:

a personality test."
The candy test.

This test is very simple,

but it's very effective,

you confront a little girl
with her greatest desire:

a candy.

-Hence your test idea.
-Exactly, because I thought:

"What is the most irresistible
candy for an adult?".

-Sex.
-Money.

€100,000 now or,
if you know how to wait,

10 times that in 10 years.

What did the identical twins choose?

One succumbed...

and the other resisted.

Failure and success, right?

Well...

If you eat the candy,
you'll be a fucking loser.

Those that show greater self-control,

make better decisions
and end up winning.

Look,

babe,

if when you put out the candy

you're hungry,

you scoff it down.

If, on the other hand,
you've had a snack,

you wait.
An infallible fucking test.

It's pure statistics.

The one who eats the candy
has no education,

when they're grown up
they get worse jobs, if any,

and their personal relationships are...

...lacking.

You know what? I think
I would've scoffed the candy.

No one doubts that.

But check this out...

I have the job I always dreamt of.

-Right, buddy?
-Sure.

I have an incredible wife
and daughter.

And my parents and siblings...
we're thick as thieves.

And I'm educated.

-Two terms in Business, right?
-And a half.

Yes. Four years and a master's.

You and Toni are
the two sides of my test.

This is such a nice dinner.

-I feel like some chorizo.
-Because my test works.

Look at Toni. He's a winner.
Do you know why?

You know why Toni's a winner?
He knows how to wait.

When he got his inheritance,
he took his time,

he invested time in finding out
how to capitalize on that money.

What would another man have done?

He wouldn't have waited,
he'd have lived off the interest

or squandered the inheritance

on some tumbledown bar.

This girl's great, I love her.
But you know what, honey?

Without Paula's and my savings,

your winner here,
my soul brother,

couldn't have invested his inheritance
in anything. You know why?

Because he wouldn't have had
the money to pay taxes to get it.

-That's right, exactly.
-No, you triumphed, amore,

because you knew how to invest
in the long term, or not?

This is like a Christmas dinner
at Citibank,

-all this investment, money...
-"Long term"?!

He put it all in bricks and mortar.
30% annual profit!

-What a long wait.
-Easy money.

-Why don't we talk about me?
-Look, Berta,

your parable doesn't hold water.

-Otherwise, your twins...
-What about my twins?

They're handy for your
little book, aren't they?

Identical twins on the outside,
but different on the inside.

-But you have no idea.
-Héctor, stop, stop.

-What don't I know?
-What happened to them.

Or do we have a second part
of the twins story?

Maybe the one who ate the candy

has a fucking great life now.

-Stop, Héctor.
-The one who held herself back,

maybe she's a lowlife
living under a bridge.

The twin who waited
is now a successful psychologist

with an established relationship
who can't ask for anything more.

Her sister lost her job,
her family and, to top it off,

she lost her life
when she got in the bath

with a glass of wine
and 30 pills too many.

Okay, that example doesn't work.

I'm so sorry, honey.
We didn't know.

Berta,

my apologies. I didn't...
My condolences.

Well, I think it's alright
if we go straight to dessert.

I bought some delicious
chocolate coulants

and a lactose-free yogurt.
We can eat up,

say a nice goodbye
and everyone goes home.

Berta.

Are you alright?

-Yes, yes.
-Careful with those pills.

It's Impulsin, It's very mild.

What the hell.

Inés. Come on, wake up,
we have to go, it's important.

Come on, quickly, up.

I can't, I have to sleep
a minimum of 8 hours.

God...

I can't let my family
miss out on this dough,

you have no First Communion

and no extracurricular activities,
which are very important.

I'll let you eat all the donuts.

-Paco, I'm tired...
-"Grandpa", damn it.

Come on, down the donuts
and sleep in back.

Is this Dad's car?

Yes, apart from you, the only
good thing your dad's given me.

Get in, miss. Here we go.

It's amazing. Delicious.

Paula, you decided a while ago.

Finish this, you finish it.

Both options have their problems.

Here the only problem is...

The million is right for you.

If not for him,
you would've signed the contract.

Anyone for coffee?
I mean, to keep things moving.

Long black, two sugars.

American-style with the V60.

A matcha tea
with a dash of soy milk.

No idea, but I'll look it up
on the Internet and bring it.

Hey, Berta...

Have you ever been
to a fortune taller?

Answer. Have you had
your Tarot cards read, or...?

-That's rhetorical, I assume.
-Not at all. I have.

-It changed my life.
-You went to a fortune teller?

When the three of us flat-shared.

What did the fortune teller say?

I asked her...

if I had any chance with you.

I didn't have the balls then
to make a move on you.

So we're together because
a fortune teller said to go for it.

-Yeah.
-Yeah?

And she didn't just predict
that we'd end up together.

-You don't say!
-You heard me.

She also said I'd have a bar.

She predicted that I'd achieve
my goals, that I'd triumph.

So the Tarot predicts the future
better than a psychological test

confirmed over decades.

No, honey,

the Tarot doesn't predict shit,
but neither does your test.

If I'm with Paula,

it's because in a time
of doubt and insecurity,

someone gave me the confidence

to show some balls with her.

Tarot and all that shit

influences people just like

the candy test influences those kids.

No, my test doesn't influence
their future, it predicts it.

No, honey.

If you're told from when
you're very small

that you're a fucking star
with a bright future,

you believe it.

If you're told the opposite,
that it's hopeless,

that you'll be a fucking failure
all your life,

you believe that too.

You're fucked, you'll be
a piece of shit your whole life.

You don't predict the future of
those kids, Berta, you cause it.

My test and the Tarot
have no connection.

Sure they do, both of them
play with people's lives.

And you know what?
It's not right.

Are you saying that
I play with people's lives?

-No, he didn't mean that.
-Yes, he did, Toni.

-Sure.
-Take it back, please.

She shits on me all night,
telling me I'm a failure

because I don't want to wait
10 years, and I have to retract it?

I'm not saying you'll be a failure
because you can't wait 10 years.

You are a failure because
you can't wait 10 years.

Berta...

-Paula, Paula.
-What?

Have you never wondered why
you change your hairstyle so much?

-Don't start, we were doing fine.
-I didn't start anything.

I want to finish this!
Why change your look so much?

Are you charging us for this?
I mean, so I get my wallet.

Changing hairstyle means
changing her life, and you.

If we ever want a consultation,
we'll call your secretary.

Paula, look at me. Why do you
change your hairstyle so much?

Because my cousin's a hairdresser
and doesn't charge me.

That's the conscious reason.

Are you ready to find out
the unconscious one?

Really, honey.
You're ridiculous.

Sorry, babe, forgive me,
but you're a joke.

The book again, come on.

Down here, read.
"When a person..."

-I read it?
-Yes.

"When

a... person...

does not... master..."

Imagine I couldn't read
and I read like that?

"When a person does not master
any aspect of their life, then..."

Seriously?
"...then they need to feel

that they control something
and external appearance

is an element that a woman
can control completely:

clothes, makeup..."

"Clothes, makeup or hairstyle

are the refuge of these women,

given that they can only
decide on this."

Bravo, bravo. You're a star.

People pay you big bucks
to say this bullshit, right?

Héctor, do you like Paula's hairstyle?

-What?
-No, tell me.

Do you like how Paula's hair, or...

would you prefer another style?

He likes it short, short.
Like when we met, you know?

-I had this meerkat face.
-Paula the meerkat.

-So you like it short, short.
-Short, short.

How long has it been since
she had it short, short?

Why? Why is she so set on
always having it

any way except exactly,
exactly the way you like it?

You know what? I'm not
set on anything. I like to vary it

and these are just extensions
my cousin put in for some reason.

If you want...

I can pull one out,
because it's just hair.

Someone else's hair, in fact.

This can't say anything
about me, it's dead hair.

Okay, you like to vary it,
but as long as

the new hairstyle isn't
what Héctor likes.

You're right. My wife won't cut
her long hair to spite me. Happy?

It's the only thing she can do!

That's why she'll choose the 100,000
instead of the million.

I still don't know what I want.

You'll choose the check because
you always do what he says.

Paula's a big girl and she'll choose
whatever the hell she wants.

She'll choose the 100,000 because
you're blackmailing her emotionally!

Fine, she can listen you,
you're so lucid with your advice.

You've had two Xanax
and two glasses of wine.

Impulsin! It's mild, very mild!

And smoking so much
doesn't show much self-control.

Enough!

Sorry, it stressed me out.

Fuck...

-I'll see if I can fix it.
-Okay.

Fuck.

Who's that now?

It sounds like my car.

Holy shit, it's my car!

Look at him, look.

He's unbelievable,
he's got no boundaries.

-Goddamn it!
-Let's see what he has to say.

-Take it easy.
-Take it easy, she says.

Fuck.

It's romantic with candles, isn't it?

If it weren't such a horrible,
dark, dismal night,

it'd be wonderful.

Alright, go.

Aren't you drinking a lot?

I'm retiring and closing down
the consultancy.

Congratulations, it's about time.

I wanted to tell you
that I'm moving back home...

and the consultancy will be vacant.

I'm giving you the flat
where I have the consultancy.

You can sell it,
pay off your mortgage

with some money left over
to renovate and expand the bar. So...?

Now tell me you wouldn't wait
another 10 years.

It's better, we all win.

And you?

What's in it for you?

A future for my daughter
and my granddaughter.

Yes, they deserve it.

The trap, Paco.
There must be a trap with you.

There's no trap.
He wants to help us. That's all.

And the change of ownership?
Will my name be on the deed?

Of course. And if you want,
I'll put it in capital letters.

And we sell it,

do what we want with the money,

and you won't interfere?

-But...
-Ah...

-With you there's always a 'but'.
-Wait, wait...

But the girl has her
First Communion, that's all.

That's it?

Yes, because my mother
would've wanted it.

Oh, yes, sorry.
One more thing...

Before I put my flat
in your name,

I want to see Paula sign
the contract for the million.

How little you trust me.

Don't worry, Paco.
With these conditions,

I could wait 20 years.

How many pills have you taken?

-Fewer than usual.
-Well...

Done. Paula signs the contract

and the flat is yours. Deal?

-A done deal.
-Now will you rip up the check?

-Terrific.
-Toni! Toni, the contract.

Coming.

Dinner, some drinks and home.
It was so easy.

The check's fucking useless now.

This sucks.

The contract.

Turn around.

-Héctor, the pen, please.
-Oh, yes.

What?

-What's wrong?
-I'll tell you in a sec.

It came up tails.

Like it did before, right?

That's why you hid it.

No, no.

Dad, I'm going to sign
this contract, okay?

But you're not giving us anything.

No, Paula, Paula, Paula...

I'm very grateful, but you're not
selling anything for us.

You're going to dump it all
over this crap? Really?

-Dad, take the girl. See you soon.
-No, no. Paco...

-No, take her.
-Paco.

Paula... Paula.

Fuck.

Look, the light's back. At last.

It looks... really pretty.

Are you a fool?
You spend the money

on these shitty lights?

You spend it on this,
after what it cost us?

-They're options, Paco.
-Options, come on.

By the way, is that Berta,
the psychologist?

-Yes, Berta, my girlfriend.
-The book girl...?

-Yes, on its 9th edition.
-Really?

And the twin sister who...?

She can hear you.

-Who?
-You're speaking loud. She's...

-I'm not. Am I speaking loud?
-Yes, you are.

-I'm not speaking that loud.
-Pretty loud, you know?

Fine. Did she hear me?

-Can we please...?
-Yes, I'll do as she says.

-What?
-Take the girl.

-Alright.
-Good night.

Berta.

Come on.

Paco, when you see each other
at home, mum's the word,

-you've done enough tonight.
-Yes, yes.

What happened?
I mean: What have I done?

-You haven't done anything.
-Right.

Héctor, right?
It's always Héctor.

I told my daughter:
"You're making the wrong decision".

When she told me she was
going out with a flatmate

and I found out it was Héctor,
who's a nutcase,

I said:
"You've got the wrong flatmate".

"You've got the wrong flatmate".

My word, how it turned out,

a dinner with friends

who met up to have a laugh,
some jokes...

It's turned to shit.

Honey, listen to me.

-10 years is a long time.
-I know.

A lot of things can happen
in 10 years.

In 10 years a lot of things

can happen again.

Do you trust me so little
that you think

-you'll never see this million?
-Three months, Paula.

Three!

Living it up, night and day.

Trips to the beach
and weekends included.

And it happened
right under my nose.

He's using emotional blackmail again.

And you ask me to trust you?

-Héctor.
-What?

Please, I want to share
this money with you.

-How can I make you believe me?
-Put it in writing.

What?

Tell Toni to put my name
on the contract.

Hey, you're sure

that in 10 years you'll share
this money with me, right?

Perfect, add my name
as beneficiary to the million

and I'll be as sure as you.

Write the name.

Pauli...
Pauli, you're doing it again.

Toni, Toni.

Paula, what Héctor's asking,
do you want it?

Add him, add him, yes.

Just with a pen?

With a pen, a pen.

You're making the biggest mistake
of your lives.

Fuck, girl. Berta, really.
Holy shit, girl.

Cut it out. Look, that's it.
It's signed, no going back.

You still have time to rip it up.

Rip up a million euros?

Didn't we talk about
mixing pills and wine?

That contract is like
people who get married,

sign a mortgage or have kids

when they know very well
that they should split up.

It's another sentence,
10 more years of living together.

Toni, really. You stop her
or I will, but someone has to.

Héctor, I'm telling you
for your own good.

That contract won't
bring you happiness

-and divorce will.
-That's a bit cheeky, eh, Berta?

No more issues. No.

Today it's money,
divorce, maybe another day.

It seems we're incapable today

of sorting out relationship problems.

Pauli...

-Divorce is good for you.
-The pot calling the kettle black.

Honey, I think you've got
all you wanted now

and we should go,
because my dad's waiting.

You know what?
I want to be with my dad.

Hold on, your dad can wait.

I can give advice too, you know?

-What do you mean?
-Hey,

you know very well
what I mean, Berta.

I swear I don't.

Consciously, no,

but unconsciously...

I put your name on the contract.
Please, what more do you want?

No, let him enlighten me.

Tell me, doctor, do you have
a toothbrush in this house?

Seriously, this more like
astrology than psychology.

Please, I've had it.

-I don't get what this is about.
-Do you have...

a toothbrush in this house?

Did you have a toothbrush
in the attic?

-No?
-No, I carry one in my bag.

-The unconscious!
-I forgot it today.

Héctor, I beg you, go.

But, bro, we're just talking.

I won't say anything that Berta doesn't
already know. She was your shrink.

She must know that you always
go out with younger girls

due to a fear of commitment.
You do know that?

Did hit your head, or what?

Two years together
and the guy was going nuts

thinking he should leave you,
and I kept quiet. Why?

Because I'm his friend.
Not like some other people.

When I told him Paula cheated on me,
he advised me to leave her.

No, seriously. Enough!

Don't drop me in it,
I wasn't at that conversation...

I don't...

You told him to leave me?

Yes.

I did.

All I wanted was...

for you two to be happy.

Like who?

Like you and Berta,
the picture of happiness?

-Now the other one.
-Exactly,

because we have
an established relationship.

I think what's happened tonight
has been fabulous,

because it's the first building block

of a much stronger relationship
for everyone.

I love this girl.

Forgive me, Berta.

-Forgive me.
-Why?

You too,

forgive me.

What's going on here?

You were right.

Right about what?

-Toni, what is it?
-What? No.

-I don't know.
-No, it's just...

-Maybe... I don't know.
-Okay.

-Well, that's it.
-Right about what?

When you said before that...

it happened under your nose,

it did happen under your nose,

but maybe not with
the person you think.

You're joking.

Of course he's joking...

Imagine him and me... fucking.

-What?
-This is killing us.

It's dumb, right?

Yes.

Is it bullshit?

It was only once.

How thoughtful.

Thanks, bro, for fucking
my wife only once.

But not once, once...
No, just once.

What?

Did it mean anything to you?

I told you that day

and I'll tell you again.

It didn't mean anything to me.

Sure, but at the time
you forgot to mention

that the one you'd fucked
was my best friend.

Tell me the truth, Paula.

Did it mean anything to you?

No.

And you?

Did what went on between you
mean anything to you?

-Keep your distance.
-Okay.

Tell me the truth, Toni.

Did it mean anything to you, yes...

...or no?

Paula...

has meant everything to me
for 25 years.

Fuck your mother
and the priest who baptized you!

-No, no!
-And the jerk gets all poetical!

Honey, please,
don't do anything stupid!

Look, it's lucky that
your dad got in ahead

-and worked it out for us.
-Worked out what?

Hey!

The alimony you'd give me until
I get half of that contract.

What? Come on.

-What?
-What what?

What? Watch it with me!

What? What?

What? What? What?

Héctor, please, we're friends.

Héctor, don't leave me.
Don't leave me, please.

Paula, don't humiliate yourself.

You can't stay with him
out of remorse.

I'm not with Héctor out of remorse!

Good, because he's never had it!

This night is unbelievable.

-What?
-Fuck, Toni.

Can you think of any other way
to blow out my night, bro?

Paula.

Listen to me, honey. Listen.

It sounds like a cliche,
but it's not what it seems.

-It is what it seems!
-I'll bust your head, you jerk!

-What? What?
-Honey...

What is it?

I was fragile, vulnerable,
very bitter.

Come here, you!
Here I come! Don't move!

All this time feeling like shit,

and who were you with?

I don't know, I don't remember!
It was night, in a bar!

-I don't even remember her name!
-"Their" names.

-God damn you!
-Their names? How many?

He felt bitter several times.

God damn you!
I'll rip your head off, you jerk!

Fuck!

Are you assholes, or what?

-Textbook, both of them.
-Assholes. I've had it!

-You have no sensitivity!
-Take some salt water!

Or finesse!

My chakras is really out of
alignment right now.

You fuck one woman your own age

and it has to be mine!

Excuse me, I'm not yours
and I'm not Toni's age.

Stop, stop. Stop.

This is a great chapter
for the 10th edition:

"Fragile masculinity...

fighting for..."

Well, I'll think it over.

You had it all, man.

Money, partner, mansion...

You had to have... her too.

I feel like I don't care
about anything,

like a snail on a mirror,
it all slides off.

Four, Paula.

-This is a nightmare.
-There were four.

And I don't remember
any of their names

because they didn't mean...

anything to me.

Let's go home, please.

Yes, let's go. Let's go.

-Alright, alright, slowly.
-My hernia.

Fucking lumbago.

You wouldn't have a robe?

I'll send it to you by...

What a night it's been.

Amore,

you shouldn't have stopped
being my patient.

Alexa, order a taxi.

Ordering a taxi.

My test works

and my book is hot shit.

No homeopathy, please.
Normal medicines.

No, no, it's heavy.

-So heavy.
-Paula.

At least let your daughter know
who her real father is.

Just kidding,
it's chronologically impossible.

We're going through
a lot of tension.

-You're an asshole.
-I could kill you.

I'm sorry, I don't know
why I did that.

You know...?

Honey, it's wet, from the pool.

I understand what
you're trying to do

and, symbolically, it's beautiful.

As she says, it's...

It's easy to turn down
a million in 10 years

for someone who can't wait.

Let's see if you can
turn this down.

Let's see, let's see.

-Fuck, he never stops.
-We're never leaving.

What are you doing, Toni?

Putting you in a dilemma.

Goodbye, bro.

A million euros
in your name instantly.

I'm going to kick the shit
out of that fucking robot.

Honey, let's go, my dad's
waiting for us at home.

It's mine?

Yes.

For me?

I can deposit it in any machine...

right now.

If it's what you prefer, of course.

Prefer to what?

To Paula.

What?

What the fuck are you doing?

What are you doing?

Let's get out of here, right now.

A million, a bird in the hand.

Fuck!

Paula...

It's the best thing, Paula.

The best for whom?

For everyone.

The only winner was Héctor.

No, we all win.

I've just lost my husband...

and you've lost Berta.

And you've lost a million.

No, I didn't lose the million.
I've invested it.

I wasn't going to leave you
in the dark, eh?

Paula!

Leave me alone, please,
this is really slippery.

Paula.

Paula

And open the door for me, please.

-Alexa, open the door.
-Opening the door.

-The other one.
-Yes, I'll say it now.

You can't open two doors at once.

Sometimes I say one thing
and Alex understands another.

You know?

Paula,

there's one way I haven't changed.

I'm very much in love with you.

You know? You chose Héctor,

I chose to wait.

I'm still waiting.

Open it up, please.

Alexa, open the outside door.

Opening the outside door.

Well...

the house.
What did you think of the house?

Your house is tacky.
It's too big,

too white, it's...

It's like a deserted mall.

Oh, one thing.

You do know that lentils exist,
and tabouleh,

apples, potato chips...?

One plate of tofu...

for me?

I'm leaving here hungry,
just saying.

I'm sorry.

Well...

WHAT WOULD YOU CHOOSE? €100,000
NOW OR A MILLION IN 10 YEARS?

-The girl?
-On the sofa. And the million?

-No million, no Héctor.
-What?

We've split up.

DEPOSIT

Inés!

Mom...

-Were you asleep?
-Yes.

Oh, sorry. I didn't realize.

2 MONTHS LATER

The new generations
of rock 'n' roll!

I've got your Communion present,
now I need to get yours.

Mom, when can we have the cake?

Right now, as soon as you cut it.

-Are you having fun?
-Yes.

-You look nice.
-So do you.

Tito!

Hi, honey.

How are you?
Look, I brought you this.

Hope you like it.

What?

I hope it has no sugar,
or my mother will kill you.

You're welcome.

Hello, good evening.

Welcome, everyone,

to this magnificent day

when my daughter, Inés,

has her First Communion.

I also want to thank Toni.

A big hand for him!

Thank you, Toni!

Without you, this would
never have been possible.

To be happy, I want a truck.

To be happy, I want a truck.

-Having fun at the Communion?
-Yes.

Great.

And the cake? Three tiers,
like I said. Three tiers.

To be happy, I want a truck.

To be happy, I want a truck.

To spit on the cops,
to feel up my girl.

To be happy, I want a truck.

-I'm going to Mom.
-Okay, see you later.

To be happy,
I want a million.

To stop worrying so much,
so the bank adores me.

To be happy,
I want a million.

He's an idiot. He's a nutcase.

To be happy,
I want a million.

To stop worrying so much,
so the bank adores me.

-What's up, Mom? Are you sad?
-A little, yes.

We'll go shopping later
and it'll pass.

Sure, shopping.

To stop worrying so much,
so the bank adores me.

To be happy,
I want a million.

One day I'll rip his head off.
God damn it to hell and back!

To be happy,
I want a million.

A million.

A million.

A million.

I'll try to speed up
the divorce proceedings

so my daughter finally
divorces this guy.

A million.

A million.

A million.

A million.