Original subtitles

How many talk shows invite somebody who has murdered 42 men and 26 women?

Ladies and gentlemen, America's favorite mystery novelist, Miss Ernesto Snoop.

Anesta, your sister, my aunt, happens to be our chief suspect.

Do you remember how it all started, Jean?

I was thinking more of how it all ended.

You don't really, you don't know.

Hurry. Geez, life may be in danger.

We're all new, Mr. Bates. We practice Kung Fu.

ref

Did you tell him we were yes?

Well, he's usually so always oh, I'm afraid we can't afford to wait. No, you'd better drive. I can't believe

Taxi

Follow that car

Not on your life, Matt

Taxi

Oh

One of them just isn't right what do you the bag doesn't compliment the jacket of the jacket doesn't complement the bag

I can't decide wait you look perfectly wonderful. I look reasonably wonderful. It's the bag and my jacket

I'm concerned about you bought the bag because it launched the jacket so well. That was last week last week the match perfectly

It isn't the bag of the jacket. It's me

Just a little nervous you always are before you do a television talk show extremely nervous

I don't know why I agree to do it. Why do I agree to do it? Because you're enough to do it. That's true

One of them just isn't right

Think I see a perfect parking space right you are dear

Wrong you are dear

Up ahead left-hand side perfect

Ladies ladies you left without me we didn't know where you went we couldn't be late

Ladies I went against the milk in case my stomach acted up and boy it sure has oh I have some marvelous tablets. I'll give you one

You have got to give me a word that you won't do what you just did no more

anymore

Alright alright. Thank you. I'll just go repark the car before you get it. We get another ticket

You ladies get into that room where they keep the guest stashed caged whatever until the show and stay there

Yes, finally. Yes, buddy. Wow. Why are you all right? Can we help you up?

We warn you mr. Bate we practiced Kung Fu. I'm glad you warned me

We had a falling out literally

May we I'm sorry. I'm blocking away

You block so well, oh you're basketball fan. Oh, she never misses a home game

You must be a nasty snoop. I'd be flattered you remember, but we've never met before now

That's where you're wrong. You see I spent many a sleepless night because of you

I'm a fan of yours and I read every book you've written. That's a lot of sleepless nights

Mr. Bates. This is my sister Gwendolyn G for short. I'm Willie for short my pleasure G

I'd like you to meet some people. This is very Wilson and

Teddy Green and that's a snoop in her sister G

And this is Chet Mariam and every players dream coach Rickovich

This is a nester snoop and a sister G and I already apologize for the behavior, all right?

Miss Snoop

You're gonna be a tough act to follow. I'm Ollie Robertson. I'm on the show too. Oh

Oh, introductions are unnecessary my sister collects you I have all your records. You're gonna get a new one in the morning

Miss Snoop yes the makeup man wants you

Oh the lug meeting you all good luck. Good luck. Oh

You

Karine what a

Hi lieutenant, what do you say Barney? You know you can get three to five for stealing a parking space, right?

Where my answer never inside you're gonna catch a show not only that part of it

They got monitors in there monitors see the side unless I find a parking space

Barney pay a dollar park the car in the garage the ladies will sell the car first

What kind of books do you write?

Mysteries oh

Mysteries are nice, but I'm into realism, you know reality reality is nice too

I'm thinking of having somebody write the story of my life. So soon. I'll be 24 next month. Oh, I see

finished

Well, it's really been fantastic talking to you. Isn't she fantastic isn't she bye?

Would you welcome Steve Allen hey

Thank you

Thank you very much break of its man we have been there and he's back

You've been there in back

You know whatever this crazy announcement is that you're gonna make not me you're not soon enough man

When it's too late. Oh no too late

Not gonna be too late when you don't even know what the man is gonna say

It's gonna be good. You mean Willie's gonna announce in the Steve Allen show that I've been promoted to general manager

Don't be any of you look record that you forget him something man now on the court. I listen to your rap off the ground

I don't have to you understand me. Oh, Willie

Now

What's the title of your new book?

Don't fret. I won't forget a promise. That's what you always promise and you always forget the masquerade murder

Oh, just keep repeating it yourself masquerade. Okay. I'll set masquerade

I do hope that Willie and his friends are all friends again

Wonder what the problem is and who's it is why?

Well, it's none of our business. No dear. No whatsoever

The same as Snoop

What did you say the name of your latest book is?

The masquerade murder

Don't we know each other I don't think so I could swear we did a gig together somewhere somewhere along the line

We have a musician were you ever taller on a basketball player?

No, oh

Again, yeah right on time. Listen. Give me one of them

Tabashees is it your stomach. How'd you know that? I told you I'm a fan fans know these things

Chat do you have the n-assa tablets I had them

They gotta be somewhere

I have some marvelous ones they really work except no substitute

Oh, I

Thought I was scrambling for a loose ball

Thank you my stomach will never forget you glad to help

Miss Snoop we're ready for you now. Well, sir

We got a lot to do today. So we're gonna get right down to work now

Our guest is a favorite of mine

How many talk shows invite somebody who has murdered 42 men and 26 women?

I ask you and I'm not giving any points for near misses ladies and gentlemen

America's favorite mystery novelist miss Ernesto Snoop

You do mr. Allen so nice to have you with us. Yeah, it's like to see thank you

You know, there's something I've always wanted to ask you miss no

It would be alright if I called you or nester of course Steve unless you think people might gossip

I certainly hope so

Shoulder do I got an announcement to me. I'll say it one more time

You cannot reach me with money because money's not where I'm at you did what I'm saying. I got all the bread

I'll never need man

Anyway, they told me you've got a new book coming out pretty soon. Is it as scary as all the others?

I hope so. I know I was terrified

But you wrote it exactly you see I can write about murder, but I faint at the sight of blood

That funny I do too. Yeah, especially if it's my own

Anyway, listen Ernie by may why don't we just go right ahead and do an out-not plug for your book?

Why not my publisher would love you terrific. What's the title of it the

I like it so far

Nest a masquerade murder

What the heck was that one of your characters coming back to haunt you?

It is synchronous. I can never remember the title of my latest book

The title is the oh no the masquerade murders in case well if we can believe over that was

We'll get back to your book a little bit later one of my producers the sober one is trying to tell me we're running late

So we'll bring up next to go stop. That's okay

You know there are stars and there are super stars, but when you talk about basketball

And they mentioned the superstar you know you have to be talking about just one man ladies and gentlemen willy baits

Willy hey willy great to have you man

Now

All right now I know you're all upset about what happened and I won't keep you thank you for your patience and your cooperation

How we ladies?

With one small oversight

She didn't cooperate. Of course you did what could you possibly know about Willie Bates if the others don't she could have seen the argument

What argument the one but the water cooler wait a minute no one else mentioned an argument by the water

Exactly

All right, Willie had an argument no one else saw you see the man's face. What makes you think was a man

What's it a woman? No, it was a man

All right, did you see the man's face? Did you hear what he said? It was too far away? It's too dark

Oh, well, then you you couldn't identify him if you saw him again. Oh, yes, I could Steven by his walk

His walk chill him dear

Oh

No, the suspect was a limp that's a cliche. They're all kinds of limbs Steven

This was not a permanent limp the man favored his foot is that recovering from an accident?

All right

All right, I get the idea. We'll talk about this later later later. You're not coming with me to the hospital

Who said anything about the hospital you are going home with Barney? Where is Barney?

We send him on an air and he should be finishing about 20 minutes. Who's gonna take you home?

Barney he's going to meet us at the hospital

Oh

Oh

Oh

Look who I see it's been how many years over 25

I thought I would feel it's odd that you don't how do you feel odd?

Can anyone play what are we talking about?

Keith

Any news

This is a surprise

You're looking remarkably well the years have done you notice service well

They've been wind of both of you ages only made you more attractive. You're an incurable romantic. I

Was cured once

Can you find out what's going on with it? They won't tell us a thing. No, no, I don't know anything

I was 14 tonight got to 414 got to 414

He's recovering you'll be all right lieutenant Estraskin I see you

I'm afraid Willie's collapse wasn't the result of natural causes

He was poisoned no one else knows

Oh, come on apparently Willie's size save his life a smaller man would have died before he reached a hospital

Now everyone here with the exception of mr. Follett is a suspect. I'll need a formal statement from each of you

How's Willie he was poisoned poison poisoned

You mean he was poisoned by poison? Yes, but he's going to be all right. What's the steps ladies?

Barney tell us what you found out Barney tell us you're not telling us anything Barney I'm distressed oh

Here's one of those pills I promised you thank you

My distress is not only internal but external as well

You didn't tell me that Willie Bates was gonna be on this show tonight

Why you know how you are with temptation Barney, but that wasn't temptation. It was the opportunity

Yours not long ago Barney cost you ten years, but this is different

Willie Bates is not only the world's greatest. He's also the whole team

And if his knee hasn't healed and you found out you could make a killing on preseason betting

Which is illegal to say the least

So now that we've been honest with you tell us what you learned from your bookmaking friend

Hey, come on. I'd be jeopardizing my parole if I had bookmaking friends. Oh, well then tell us what you learned from your

accountants

Well, there's talk that

Willie was gonna say something on the show tonight that would affect the welfare of the team. What was that?

The talk didn't know but the odds according to the accountants

Was that whatever he had to say was not good for the team and the poison even the odds

You want some tea before bed I don't think so dear being a suspect even technically

It's an exhausting

Stephen

And would you say worried worried? Yes with an undercurrent of reluctant duty

Stephen you're worrying too much working too hard at least we'll get to my problem later and gee

This is very difficult for me. Yeah, but I must warn you dear

No, no, thank you. No tea and gee

I must warn you that anything you say can and will be used against you

Stephen you must have some tea. Yes. It's my special brew. No wait a minute and gee and Esther you you're not listening

Yes, I am you said I must warn you anything you say can and will be used against you

And I said have some tea. I don't think that can be used against me

And Esther your sister my aunt

Happens to be our chief suspect. That's impossible. Is that the right color for you? Yes. I know it's impossible

You know it's impossible, but unfortunately in front of witnesses you gave Willie the poison that almost killed him

Oh, I think I gave Willie was a man tested tablet sugar dear. No, no, and gee

I I know that but it wasn't an acid tablet. It was 50 milligrams of cyanate

One or two lumps

According to witnesses Willie hadn't eaten anything earlier and our chief pathologist estimated the poison was ingested between 10 and

15 minutes before he collapsed. Oh my I suppose that means the next order of business is grilling the poor dear

Question and Esther. It's questioning from your side of the desk Stephen from our side. It's grilling

You're not drinking your tea dear

That's upset shall I get you an antacid tablet?

Mr. Nicholson yes

I know ten McDonald's oh, I'm Stevens and gee and this is my sister or mr.

Nessa we've heard so many nice things about you from Stephen the admirer work tremendously

And I hope you don't mind if we call you earnings wait a minute

Which one of you is the suspect we both are actually, but I'm just a general suspect. I'm the prime suspect

this way please

Just imagine how many real criminals have sat in these very chairs

Show we get down to business

As you know, I'm conducting this preliminary questioning because of your relationship with Lieutenant Ostrowski. You've been a prize of your rights

Yes

Had you ever met Willie Bates before

No, then why did you give my tablet containing the lethal dose of cyanote cyanate Ernie?

It's a crystallized extract of all right all right cyanate

a lethal dose to an unsuspecting man, mrs. Nicholson isn't that correct let the record show that Gwendolyn Snoop Nicholson refuses to answer the question

On the grounds that it implies willful knowledge and intent what?

Let the record show that Gwendolyn Snoop Nicholson refuses

Wait a minute. What's going on here?

What do you think you are a lawyer?

I'm sorry Ernie. I thought you knew

I'm not Ernie. I am a lawyer lieutenant

You have to have a degree to be a lawyer Miss new I have a degree

I got one 28 years ago when I was researching my first book your second year. Are you sure I thought it was the first ladies ladies?

Can we get back to business?

Now witnesses have stated that you apparently were very familiar with mr. Bates's stomach problems. Is that correct?

Every basketball fan is

Naturally and you just happen to have your own head-assed tablets handy at the exact moment that mr. Bates needed one

Yes

All right. I think that will be all for now. Oh, you forgot to ask one question lieutenant

I did you forgot to ask the suspect why she voluntarily supplied a tablet to mr

Bates when he was surrounded with people who would normally furnish them to him

Yes

Why did you voluntarily supply the tablet and when mr. Bates was surrounded by people who normally furnished him to him?

Well, I she refuses to answer

That's it ladies. That's it. Thank you lieutenant. Is anything wrong?

If it's your stomach

Try one of these

Goodbye. Goodbye. Thank you

Don't worry darling you were marvelous in there a real tough cookie

Thank you, Ernesto. What a lovely thing to say. I don't believe those cops

I don't know you they don't know you at all. How do they think you did it? I'm giving willy a fantastic tablet

You mean like the one you gave me yes, well, where'd you get that thing? You know drugstores make mistakes a lot. Oh

I gave one to Steve and one to lieutenant but Donald

Good wipe out the whole force. I even had one myself earlier. Oh

Okay

Really one thing is certain I

Know the killer is obviously someone who knew really well enough to know that he uses his antacid when he's upset

That means that person might deliberately have provoked the conflict and then planted this signate tablet in your purse

Or somehow switched the tablet

I'm still the number one suspect. Well, yes, the police have established an opportunity

You did give the antacid tablet to willy

But no one could accuse you of having a motive and they never arrest anyone without a motive

There's one person in our group of suspects who might say I had a motive

But that was such a long time ago

Still you're right

This must be the one to help me so

Oh

An excellent job Harry oh boy, they took a hook line and sinker

Willy Bates

Hospitalized with virus attack and this what I like willy fell by flu

How about Bates battles bug?

Well this is in surprise. Well, how nice to see you. I thought it was Harry Goldman my public relations back

Come on sit down here. I'm nice to see you

What about some tea now? Oh no, no, would you like a cocktail?

I hear that willy continues to improve isn't that wonderful news?

Do you realize what the loss of willy baits would have done to our attendants?

Oh, who I hate to think about it, and I don't want to talk about it. Let's talk about something flat

Remember the good old days

Do you I remember them?

Gee is so it we yesterday. That's what we were afraid of

Huh? There's a problem. You see I'm a suspect in the attempt on Willy's life

You isn't it silly?

Well, it's ridiculous. I'll call the police right now and tell them just how no just how could be the problem

What only if you think is the police do which of course the police do

Excuse me ladies, but

Just what are we talking about well

No romance romance our romance

Do you remember how it all started gee? I was thinking more of how it all ended

When gee broke off the engagement and you threatened to sue me for breach of promise all the publicity and that statement

I made that you weren't fit to inhabit the earth what has all that got to do with your being a suspect?

It's foolish of course, but the police conceivably might interpret that statement and the commotion that went before it

as a motive the idea being that killing willy would be an effective way of hurting you

But how could the police possibly believe that you would wait what for 25 years?

Well, they're mostly men. They might think a woman couldn't make up her mind. Oh, yes, yes, I see

Well, I assure you ladies this secret will just remain in this circle right here

Thank you. Leave. No, wait a minute. You're not leaving now. Yes. You just got here. I know

But we must can I get you something? No, really. Are you all right? Oh, I just pulled a

Muscle scheme last weekend

You want to see me on those slopes? I'm a real tiger

Imagine

Well, I hate to assure you right now. See you just get in turn around and I'm sure

Bye, kie, bye

Are you positive that his limp was the limp absolutely?

He's the man who was talking to willy

Then he was in the building. How many suspects do we have who might have switched the pill

Including you

There's Keith now

Chet

Ollie Robertson and all of those basketball players about whom we know so little

Mm. Shall we know more?

There that's probably where the team holds its meetings

No, that's not where the team holds its meetings right dear

Yo, let's just take an easy way out man. You did

Excuse us. We didn't mean to interrupt. That's all right. Just say my day. You can have

Heroes you're nothing but a bunch of overgrown overpaid kids with stomach problems

Listen, you think willy's tummy kiss bad. You should try to live with mine

But everybody knew about willies. You know if I had a seizure during the middle of a ball game and willy

Semic was upset they'd probably walk over my body to give him his tablet

I'm surprised he didn't carry his own

Oh, why should he when you're as famous as willy is people just love to carry things for you

You don't talk as if you liked willy very much

Like him. I like winning and willy wins. You're almost lost yesterday

Now look I have no idea who poisoned him. That's what you're getting at

Certainly not we just thought you might know what announcement he was going to make ladies

A coach is like a man whose wife has been cheating on him. He's always the last to know

The next me to Barney

Oh

Willy's announcement is the crux of everything. It seems that only willy knows what he will going to say

Oh

Hello Barney I was just putting this in. Mm-hmm. That's what it's for Barney

Angie by Stephen how lovely I hope you still feel that way when we finish talking

Oh Stephen it's only a parking meter surely I won't have to go to court

I wish that's all there was to it

Angie we know all about your relationship with Keith followed

You predicted it and they'll probably give it credence

My superiors consider this very incriminating

What do you mean she predicted it dear what you're talking about took place 25 years ago

Now surely a woman can't be held responsible for what she said 25 years ago

After all why didn't she do something about it before this

Well my superiors feel that very often women can't make up their mind

Minds

They feel they feel that it tends to uh establish motive

Of course Stephen you're looking very worried

Is there anything you're trying to tell us?

Angie I'm afraid you're under arrest

Oh my

So predictable

This is extraordinary I don't don't

Surely you just flew to

I'll take her on as part of it

No one don't get excited

I'll get to you in a minute Gwendolyn

Do you and the district attorney seriously mean to press this

You're a reigning your own arm

It's not me your honor it's the district attorney

And he's perfectly right

I object your honor

New object

Something's very wrong here

Your honor

Well your honor please

Your honor will move on

My hey I have a little quiet in my court

Please

The nature of this case demands that I have a little confidence with my

The accused in private

Good afternoon

Good afternoon George

Your honor

Please now your young man

Do you want to be arrested for loitering

Dear me dear me

Serious allegations here

G quite serious

Norman you still haven't ruled on my objection

Oh for hip and sake

What was it?

I forgot

Overroaled

Exception

Note it

Now what are we going to do about this little business

I tell you what

I'll call a long recess

And we'll talk about it over that

Objection

Dear you don't have a law degree

I know but I always wanted to say that

Well I'll take this under submission

In the meantime G

I'm releasing you on your own recognizance

That's lovely of you Norman

But I can't accept a favor like that

Set it right in the paper

A bad day for their goals

And let me see

Let me see Lois Bale

No it's possible

But ah here we are

Nevada versus Gelson

25 dollars

Dear I only have 15

Don't suppose you take a check

Ladies

Permit me the finest moment of my day

A small loan

There

That makes it 25

Just give it to the bed

Hey, nice doing business with you both

Lovely seeing you again Norman

Oh I feel so foolish saying this

But don't leave the city

Please

Hey, babe

Of course I don't mind you coming

Glad of the company

Though I don't think I can be much helping answering any of your questions

Please

Sit down

What exactly is it that you do for Willie

I'm the expert on Willie's correspondence

Well

What about his business affairs?

Finance

I have nothing to do with those

Any other questions?

Yes one

How do I get out of this chair?

Oh dear

Oh dear

Oh dear

What nearly devoured you

Yes

I don't think it's been fed lately

All right

Thank you

They are lovely

All of them

That's the question in reverse

You're a very bright young woman

Honest one too

There is no love affair between Willie and me

Just friends

Girls came and went in the parade

Willie's a big man with big appetites

I never could settle for just being an hors d'oeuvre

That's his private line

Excuse me

Hello

Yes I hold

Yes I hold

It's the hospital

Please

Make yourself comfortable

I hope it's good news

Oh be positive there

Of course it's good news

Dear

Oh isn't this whole still now

I'll reel you in

Are you all right?

Are you all right?

We almost floated way on the time

Hello

Yes Chet

Oh thank God

Is this your?

What did they say?

That's wonderful

Does he want anything?

Okay

Give him my love

Tell him how glad we are

You were right

It's good news

Willie is okay

That was Chet

He was almost crying with relief

But that's natural

They're so close aren't they?

They've been best buddies for a lot of years

Ever since the fight

The fight

I don't know about the fight

I told you about Willie's appetites

He has a temper to match

Well a long time ago

He and Chet played on opposite teams

Got into a hassle under the basket

Got out of hand

And Chet was badly hurt

Now remember the story

He had to quit basketball after that

Because of the injury

Willie's paid it back a hundred times over

Is there anything else?

Willie mentioned some numbers

While he was delirious

What?

Four?

Fourteen

I really don't know

Well you've been very helpful

You really must be going

Yes

Please

But they know where

They're good friends of his

Just go on

Didn't look very encouraging from here

You should have heard it up close

Well his mother couldn't get into Sam

Lieutenant's orders

Well it's urgent we talked to Willie

And find out what his announcement was going to be

Different friends I done my best

Not quite

Do you remember when we worked here

As grey ladies?

Yes

There

Barney dear

I'm going to tell you exactly what you had to borrow

And where to find it

Are you listening?

Like my life depended on it

Because I know it does

I think this will work to you

Trust me

That's what the clergyman used to say

To the condemned man in the old movies

Must be run there

Spritely, sprightly, now

Nurses always move quickly

Nurses quickly emergency get in here

Nurses get in here

But only if you don't think of the sight of blood

Or if they get in your main states

What happened?

Oh don't tell me I remember

Now dear I think you should just lie here

Quietly nonsense

We have to get to Willie's room fast

Oh man

Just taking off the suit

Normal hospital procedure

Yes ma'am

Just telling me how a seven foot man disappears

I'm telling you I went right out the window

Like he said he's seven feet

He's his own moderate

As cute

As cute

I'll put that in the report

Why didn't you notice he was gone?

A few minutes ago

These two nights little nurses came up

Said they wanted to look inside

I'm going to get out of here

I'm going to get out of here

I'm going to get out of here

I'm going to get out of here

I'm going to get out of here

I'm going to get out of here

Inside regular floor nurses

Or little ladies but this high

Yeah

Real little and cute too

For older types

Yeah

Adorable

Get me an aspirin

What?

Get me an aspirin

Yes sir

Why would Willie disappear?

Probably didn't feel safe even in the hospital

I've got my friend on the phone

He says he won't do it

But Barney we only want to look at Mr. Follett's books

Ladies explain something

I can understand about the others

But how do you figure Follett for a suspect?

Quite simple

He could have dropped that poisoned pill

Into Willie's cup of water at the drinking fountain

Barney

Your friend

We still want to see Mr. Follett's books

But ladies you're talking about stealing

Not stealing

Microfilm

Would be lovely

What?

Oh

Hey they just want pictures

Yeah

He says okay but he wants more money okay

Okay

Yeah right

Fine

He says he'll see somewhere tonight

Good

You know what I don't understand

Is why would the owner of a ball club

want to kill his star player?

Not necessarily kill him

Just silence him for that particular time

Silencing?

Supposed to hear the announcement

Willie was going to make on Mr. Allen's show

Was that he was going to

If Keith really wanted to sell the team

Without Willie

What would it be worth?

It'll have incense

All right

Keith is in deep financial trouble

The worst kind

He don't have to be a CPA to figure out what he's been doing

Eight companies

All of them hanging on the ropes

And he keeps juggling money into each one as it's needed

No question

The team is his only real asset

And he has to sell it

Before his money juggling act catches up with him

Well at least it takes him out the suspect list

I mean um

I mean how can he sell the team

Without Willie alive and kicking

Can't argue that

Think of it this way though

Say it's still Keith behind it

But he wasn't trying to kill Willie

Only by time

Remember

It was an underdose of poison

Yes you said

Keith was just trying to silence Willie for a few days

But that only works

Here if there's someone trying to buy the team

And there's only one man who can come up with that information

Barney

Call a friend

Well I'll tell you later I'd like to help you

But I have no idea where Willie is

Yeah well Chuck there must be someplace he goes

When he wants to uh

Peace and quiet

When he wants to hold up you know

Well

You don't know Willie

He likes to play the field

He's no loner yeah

Yeah

Lieutenant

Ollie Robertson is on the phone

Oh excuse me sure

What do you say Ollie?

Hey good fuzz how goes the basketball caper

Man your words ain't making it with Bach in the background

Oh yeah yo hand-spashing himself

You got a pretty good ear

You make good sounds

You have there's no market for it

That's why Oliver Osborn Robertson is

Ollie Robertson

Yeah any idea why the two of you called

Yeah I just remembered something I thought might interest you

Hey Ollie we're bar 32

Yeah coming

Hey Lieutenant

Do you think Brahms?

Oh

That's our next session

Why don't you come on up

57th and 6th

One flight up banner studios

I got it

Be there Piper

Good I'll see you

Oh ladies

Ladies have I got some hot information

I just talked with Charlie

Charlie

Ooh

Don't matter it's not his real name

Anyway I could have said Fred

Tony that's his real name

What is the hot information?

Well you were right

Someone is trying to buy the team

A big financial type out of Chicago guy named Coltrane

Very interesting

Gets better

You know that other player on the team of guy named Jim Saunders

Yes

Word is he is real close to this Mr. Coltrane

Ollie

Hey Ollie

I'm Robert's undead

How dreadful a sudden illness?

A sudden murder

Why did you know him?

Well we only met him on the Steve Alomshaw

Though we always enjoyed his records

Well did you see or speak to him after the show?

No

No

You sure?

Why absolutely

Why Steven?

I don't know

I'm just looking for some kind of a connection

I get the feeling Ollie was murdered to prevent him from telling me something

About Willie

I don't know

Why what could he possibly know about Willie that would make someone real?

I don't know that either

That's what I'm trying to find out

Um

And why I'm finding out

What's up?

They have yourselves

We might even do better than that

Because of what we know about

That gentleman from Chicago and Jim Saunders

Exactly

Good

Hi, sweet Jim

I swear to work at work at work

Hold and slow and I come on, choose some air

Get up there

Two in a row again man

Go

Go

Yeah

Jim

No street choose lady

Oh Jim

I suppose congratulations are in order

Congratulations about what?

Well that nice friend of yours from Chicago wants to buy the team

Now where did you hear a thing like that?

First straight source

You don't look happy Jim

Why with so powerful a friend you might wind up being a coach instead of just a player

And I wonder what Willie would say to that

Now ladies please

I get the very unpleasant feeling you're trying to tie me in with what happened to Willie

We'll just take a 180 degree turn and hit west

I don't have nothing to do with that, Ness

Oh

Well what do you think I am? Some kind of a clank hit or something?

Alright suppose what you're saying is true

My friend is trying to buy the team

Much as I'd hate to admit it

Willie would be a great big part of that deal, wouldn't he?

I ain't a wiz kid or nothing like that but on the other hand

I'm hardly stupid enough to go and shoot down a deal like that

Just because I don't like Willie

No no

But you must remember dear

That Willie was deliberately given an underdose of poison

Just enough to keep him quiet for a few days

Can we try a 414 to 414 moment?

Jim what is a 414?

A 414

What's a what?

A 414 what is it?

It's a fast break

Nice break

Fuck you

OK, OK.

Here we go.

Here we go.

Get on.

Get on.

Get on.

Get on.

OK.

Go around.

Knock it.

Get on.

Over here.

Get in.

Here.

Get it.

Get it.

Hey, shoot!

Get.

Get on.

Get on.

Get on.

OK.

OK.

Come on.

Get on.

Over here.

Get in.

Get in.

Get it.

Right.

Right.

Right.

Get it.

Get on.

Get it.

Get it.

OK.

Hold it.

Whoa.

Give it a ball.

Wow.

You guys come charging like somebody to drop 10 bucks across the street.

Now speed is important, but you've got to be able to control the ball also, right?

I don't want to play anymore.

Why don't you do some of your magic trick?

Yeah!

Yeah!

All right.

All right.

OK.

One more.

Hold it.

Ready?

OK.

Now what is my hand my right hand?

The dog.

OK.

I don't have anything in my left hand, do I?

No.

OK.

Now you see the dime.

Yeah.

Good same my left.

Bye, Golly.

There it is.

Hi.

Hi.

That's enough.

That's enough.

Right to the game.

Come on.

There it is.

How are you?

You know, you don't belong in my court and those clothes.

That was very kind of you to take the time to help those youngsters.

Well, they're great kids and I have a lot of spare times.

I don't mind a bit.

We were watching another basketball practice today.

Oh?

Yes.

There was a number.

What was that number?

414.

Right.

Fast break.

Imagine my forgetting that.

That's the number that Willie said to you in the hospital.

It was?

Where on the doctor said he was delirious, right?

But we know better, don't we?

He was frightened and he'd want his best friend to help him.

And he didn't get out of that hospital alone.

Now if you were to mention to us where he is, knowing we certainly aren't going to hurt him.

And we might be able to talk to him and even help him.

Oh, shit.

We know you're trying to protect Willie, but maybe you're trying too hard.

Too hard.

What do you mean?

Well, maybe he should move someplace else now.

After all, we figured out your code other people could too.

Yeah, you're right.

He's over in Jersey and that place a friend of ours owns.

There's no phone, but would you like for me to draw your map?

Please.

Okay.

Hey, Harry, can I use the pen?

Okay.

Go over the fridge.

And don't go to Nia.

Right?

Morning, Tom.

Morning, Lieutenant.

That boy's all finished?

Left a couple of minutes ago, Lieutenant.

One over every inch gave it the works.

Yeah, well, when things are going, it'll probably add up to zero.

Nothing's been changed, huh?

Just like you ordered, sir.

Thanks, Tom.

You're welcome.

The farmhouse should be just around that bend, Barney.

Now, Willie, don't blink, Chet.

We made him tell us where you were.

This is Barney.

He works for us.

Hi.

Hi, honey.

Listen, no sweat.

Come on in.

I was going stir crazy anyway.

Well, a friend's Herbie. He's a my good friend's a snoop, sisters.

Herbie Thomas is old man owns this place.

Hello, Herbie.

Hi.

You and his kids fantastic.

It's beating me six straight.

Sometimes I cheat.

I don't have to, with Willie.

Oh, I don't have to, with Willie.

You're going one of these.

Get out of here.

Willie, isn't it about time you came back?

Listen, after reading about Arlie, I may never come back.

Are you that farm of Chez?

Well, I am fond of living.

That is, if you call this living.

But it doesn't have to be this way, Willie.

Just tell us the announcements you were going to make.

It's real simple, Anaster.

I was going to say, Willie Bates.

Ex-Basker-Boster.

You are quitting, then.

That's right, Gee.

Listen, when my knee is one bad fall,

I could be living the rest of my life.

Then what will you do, Willie?

Well, I'm going to stay right here into the police kester,

hopefully.

Have you thought of this, Willie?

If Gee and I could find you, so could someone else,

this seems a dangerous place to be.

Well, it's a lot safer than leaving it.

So I'm going to count on you, ladies.

Not to tell where I am.

OK?

And then it goes for you two.

Who are you?

I never met you before in my old life.

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Steve, how lovely.

Maybe. Maybe not.

And, Gee, you told me the one time you met Ali was at the show.

Is that what you said?

Of course.

And you never spoke to him again.

You had no contact with him.

You'll tear none.

OK.

Then just tell me how he got this.

What is it?

Why?

It appears to be my name and our telephone number.

In Ali's handwriting.

And your number is unlisted.

Any explanation?

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Anyone?

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And, Gee, don't you understand?

The circumstantial evidence keeps piling up against you.

We haven't been able to uncover anything against the other suspects.

Jim, Chet, Mary, Rakovich, and Fallip.

There's not a decent mode of among them.

Decent or indecent there is a motive.

It's just not visible yet.

I'll say it isn't.

Which brings us back to Ali having your phone number.

He didn't have anyone else's.

That you know of?

That anyone knows of, including the district attorney.

He wants to question you.

No.

Well, doesn't he have anything else to do with his time?

Really? Come on. We're ready.

No, no.

I'm sorry he was very emphatic about that.

About what?

But you not being present.

I'm her attorney.

Adonessa, you got a law degree, but you never bothered to take the bar exam.

You're not licensed to practice. The DA checked.

My, but he's a stickler.

Shall we?

It's all right, dear.

If they charge me with murder, I'll just ask that the trial be postponed till you can pass the bar.

If she's really being arrested, why didn't you tell us, Tarski, you know where Willie is?

We gave our word.

You know what? I think you're being used.

I think somebody is sending you around in all wrong directions. You're shell-king.

Oh, confusion by misdirection. The hand is quicker than the eye.

You know it.

The old technique of con artists and magicians.

Magicians?

Well, this magician got to do it.

That's what we've got to find out.

Get the car. Barney, hurry.

If I'm right, Willie's in worse danger than he ever was.

Hi there. You want to play?

Not just now, thank you. I'll give you a rook and two pawns.

That's very tempting, but not right this minute.

Where's Willie?

He left.

When?

About a half hour ago.

Where'd he go?

I don't know. I was just coming to the house when I saw him leaving with somebody.

Could you recognize who was driving the car?

It was too far away.

Where's the nearest telephone?

At the gas station on the main road.

How about a night, two pawns at a bishop?

I'm home. I think I beat the rap.

Having trouble?

I can't get Stevens.

Lieutenant Dostrovsky, please.

When do you expect him?

This is Ernesto Snowpisant.

Would you please tell him to meet me at home in half an hour?

Thank you. And tell him it's urgent.

What's wrong?

Everything.

Stevens not in his office.

Gee's not at home.

Now don't start worried.

I am worried.

Do you realize that someone who drove Willie away could very well be the killer?

Good chance.

Gee is the prime suspect.

Ridiculous, but true.

If anything happens to Willie, that's bad enough.

But if the killer lures G away from the house and she has no alibi...

Hello?

Yes, is she?

Who?

Oh, of course I didn't recognize your voice.

Yes, I'm quite alone.

Why?

Are you sure?

Well, when?

I see.

Oh, yes. Of course.

I'll come right away.

Would you repeat that?

Yes, I've got it.

Oh, yes. Don't worry.

I'll leave right away.

Bye.

Barney, can't you go any faster?

Not in the key for wheels on the ground.

Try Barney, try.

You see, aren't things bad enough as it is?

For cop stuff, we've had it.

You're right, of course.

Oh, dear.

What now?

I see.

I guess all my hope he stays home.

Okay, Chef, what's this all about?

You didn't bring me down here to make one last pitch, did you?

I did.

You can't quit playing ball, Willie.

You're at the height of your career.

And that's the time to quit when you're on top.

If you're not in the way of playing ball,

you're not in the way of playing ball.

You're in the way of playing ball.

You're in the way of playing ball.

You're in the way of playing ball.

So you get to quit when you're on top.

If you can afford it, I know I've had some good years,

so I can afford it. Listen, it's a while for the same.

You dig?

Come on, Willie.

We've been friends for too long, there's a lot more involved here than money.

You've got a chance to become a legend.

A Joe Lewis. A Henry Iron.

You quit now and you throw all that away.

Chef, you saw the x-phase.

What did the doctor say?

One bad friend of mine wanted me to walk around and lip and the rest of my life.

Do you think I want that?

Well, I don't.

I got your message. What's up?

Oh, forget my message.

Gee is missing.

What? I thought she was with you.

No. And Willie's missing, too.

Well, I know Willie's missing.

Yes, but he's more missing than ever now.

What? I'll explain it on the way.

On the way, where?

That's what we have to figure out.

Gee took directions on that pad,

and there's a little faint imprint left.

Does that suggest anything to you?

Well, this is insane.

I mean, is this all we've got to work with?

No. She wore her green pumps,

and she used an ample amount of trellis.

Oh, now wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Slow down. I...

A large room.

What?

Trellis is a heavy, musky kind of a perfume.

Gee would never use it unless she was going someplace

open and spacious.

And the shoes, of course.

Of course. They're her highest heels.

She's going to meet Willie and Chet.

Chet, how did he get into this?

Oh, that's part of what I'll have to explain later.

Where would she be going to meet them in a gym?

A gym? No, no. Wait a minute.

Wait a minute. This could be the interior of the arena.

Steve, and you're a genius.

Hurry. Gee's life may be in danger.

Her life may be in danger.

Why did you say so?

I'll explain later.

No chance, huh?

Well, you should know that, chair.

I mean, if all the cats man, you should know.

Yeah.

Well, I just wanted to give it one more chance before...

Before what?

What's your problem, Chet? What's a gun for?

It's the only way I know it's stopping you, Willie.

Stop me from what? What's the matter with you?

Look, man, I'm just going to retire.

You dig it and spin some of this bread I got and just lay back.

Brad, you hired? Right now you're flat broke.

The last time I checked the books, I was a rich man.

Not your trouble, Willie.

You didn't check the books often enough.

You were too busy leading a super life of a superstar.

I trusted you, man.

Trest doesn't have anything to do with it.

Five years ago, you damn near killed me in one of your rages.

Sure, you paid all the bills.

And everything healed, right?

Wrong.

My broken elbow didn't heal.

Now, we've been through this a thousand times, man. A thousand times.

Now, I made your partner my company.

And I did everything, man. Everything I could have make up for that.

I don't want to talk about it no more.

Nothing you could ever do would make up for what you took away from me.

I could have been just as good as you, Willie.

I could have.

What'd you do with the money?

I spent it.

On what?

Bad investments.

Stock market, land.

I blew it.

You're the one who poisoned me, right?

That's right.

You see, I'm a lot smarter than people gave me credit for.

No, you're not, Chad. You are not smart, man.

You know what you are? You are just sad.

You're forgetting about the half a million dollars that you're insured for.

Now, I'm not going to be sad when I collect that.

I'm going to be a happy man.

And I am smart, Willie.

And the one suspect is coming up in that elevator right now.

You see, she's the one that's going to be charged with your murder.

Come on. Check your cards.

Ernesta, I mean it.

Stay right where you are.

Why can't we just, I mean, listen.

Forget it. I mean, like, forget it.

Please.

Willie!

I want you all right.

Come on, left.

Steve, I didn't get it.

You all right?

I'm fine.

No!

Hey, Ernesta.

No, Ernesta, get the gun.

The gun, Ernesta, I'll get it.

Yeah, the hose, get back there. I'll get the gun.

Get the gun.

Hey!

Women! Close the water!

Oh!

Hey,

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Listen, I'll drag that by one more time.

The whole thing about the magician and the... I don't understand that.

If you were a chess player, you would take a real magician to be able to switch the poise

and for the antacid right in front of everybody.

Yes, you see, Ollie must have played in a band on the same bill with Chet when Chet was performing as a magician.

I think that's what Ollie was calling to tell me.

Unfortunately, Chet was in my office when Ollie called.

Well, I guess I owe my life to you people.

Tip four thing like that. Hey, men, that's my job.

There is one thing you can give us.

What's that?

Permission to write a book about our experiences.

That'd be very flat to be in a book of yours, Anestia.

Oh, but dear, do you think it... Yes, I do.

Oh, you're quite right, dear. One exception.

Have to change the ending.

But, of course, no one would believe that the hero overcame the villain with a fire, Ollie's.

LAUGHTER

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