Original subtitles

[Reba] Now, previously on Reba...

- What did you call me? - Reba.

See, now that we're renters,

I don't think it's right for me to call you Mrs. H.

Oh, and I'm cuttin' down on my carbs, so keep that in mind. Okay, "Rebe?"

Barbra Jean said she saw you in bed with Dad.

What?

Hey, Barbra Jean.

I think we should talk.

See? Bye.

Yeah, I think so too.

But could you give me a minute with Reba first?

You want me to leave?

Okay, I'll leave.

But make it a good minute, Brock. Make sure that at the end of that minute,

you've figured out whatever it is you need to,

because I can't keep living like this.

Brock, go after her.

She thinks that you think you made a mistake

by leaving me and marrying her and everything.

- Go tell her she was wrong. - I don't think I can do that.

And why the heck not?

Because...

I do think I made a mistake.

What?

I said, I do think I made a mistake.

[sighs]

[chuckles] Oh, boy.

Yeah.

How long have you felt this way?

I don't know. I'm not sure what I feel.

You're not sure?

Well, do you feel this?

Ow!

What'd you hit me for?

You say marrying Barbra Jean was a mistake,

and you're not sure?

How can I figure out how I feel if I can't talk about it?

Well, I don't know. But you can't go around blurtin' stuff out

and then decide whether or not you believe it.

That's how you got in trouble with our wedding vows.

Don't you wanna know why I think I might have made a mistake?

No.

What if you're one of the reasons?

You know what?

I couldn't care less what your reasons are,

because whatever your reasons are, they come from you.

You know what?

I do care, and you knew I would.

- You're despicable, Brock. - I--

You talk about how much more sensitive you've become,

and everything you do causes chaos.

This is just another example,

how your selfishness is tearin' everybody else's lives apart.

So you wanna hear?

[gasps] Are you listenin' to me?

I do and I don't wanna hear. How much more clear can I be?

Okay, I've changed my mind.

I'm not gonna let you two decide my life

while I'm sittin' in the living room drainin' the hard-candy bowl.

- It's okay, Barbra Jean. We're done. - No, we're not.

- Yes, we are! - Oh, no, no, no, no.

You guys don't get to make the choice. I do.

And I've decided I'm leavin'.

- No, no, no. I'm leavin'. - I am.

- I am. - Rock, paper, scissors.

- Barbra Jean, I'm not gonna-- - One, two, three, shoot.

[sinister laugh]

Rock beats air. I win.

You didn't win. I wasn't playing.

Well, let's play now.

Okay, paper covers rock. Bye.

Reba, you get back here! You cheated!

What are you lookin' at, old lady? Huh?

Just walk your dog, okay?

Reba!

I'm not sure why I married either one of 'em.

[Reba] Ha, hey!

♪ My roots are planted in the past ♪

♪ Though my life is changing fast ♪

♪ Who I am is who I want to be ♪

♪ A single mom who works too hard ♪

♪ Who loves her kids and never stops ♪

♪ With gentle hands And the heart of a fighter ♪

♪ I'm a survivor ♪

I don't get it.

So I called your mom "Reba."

What is the big deal? Why did she have to get so mad?

I mean, sure, it's not the greatest name in the world, but...

I mean, it's better than, say, Mabel or Floyd.

Floyd? Floyd's a man's name, honey.

Oh, yeah? Tell that to my Aunt Floyd.

- Hey, maybe I could use her middle name. - It's Nell.

- Nell? - Uh-huh.

- Nell. - Yeah.

Nelly. Old Neller. [grunts]

[Cheyenne clears throat]

What?

We were trying to have a private conversation.

We're trying to figure out something important,

- if you don't mind. - Yeah, thanks.

The answer's "once."

You only have to lather, rinse and repeat once.

Why do you always cause trouble?

I know. I'm sorry. It's a real character flaw.

- Yes, it is. - Yeah.

And I wish you'd told me that three bottles of shampoo ago.

I'm just a little upset about Barbra Jean finding Mom and Dad in bed together.

What?

No way.

That's what Barbra Jean says.

Kyra, do not kid about this, okay?

Don't try and get us to overreact so you make us look stupid.

Honey, Kyra does not have that power over us.

Only we can make ourselves look stupid.

Mom. Hey, you're back.

Yeah. How's, uh, Mr. H?

"H" as in Mr. "Hot."

So, what... What happened?

I don't want to talk about it.

- Come on. - Let's go in.

Hey, Ma. So, uh, you were over talking to, uh... to Barbra Jean?

How... How... How... How is she?

- How is she? - Mm-hmm.

[chuckling] How is she?

She's married to Brock. Figure it out.

You know, we were just wondering, Nell...

What did you call me?

I know. It's not workin' for me either.

Did you need somethin'?

Mom, Kyra told us about you and Dad.

[imitates bedsprings squeaking]

Ow.

All right, all right, all right. Stop it, both of you.

That did not happen.

And I can't believe you would think anything could happen.

Why not?

It's Dad going through his whole mid-life crisis, part two.

Between him wanting to be a pro golfer and going to therapy,

and hanging around you all the time, Mom,

things have gotten a little weird lately.

That doesn't mean anything's going on between us.

- Good. - Right.

- What? - Yeah.

You and Dad getting back together would be horrible.

In fact, I think it's the worst thing that could possibly happen.

I'm neutral.

Look, Mom, I did want you guys to get back together originally,

but once you got over it, you were so much happier.

And now there's Barbra Jean, who I've actually grown to like.

Again, I'm neutral.

Mom, you may think this is just about you and Dad,

but it's not. Okay?

It would change things for all of us.

I don't want everything to fall apart again.

We may be from a broken home, but at least it is still intact.

Where are you going?

To clear things up with your father.

[door closes]

Man, she cannot stay away from Mr. Hot.

Hey, Brock, we need to talk.

Actually, I'm a little busy being selfish and causing chaos.

Okay, fine. I deserved that.

Yeah, no kidding. I was trying to tell you something important today.

Well, maybe I'm not ready to hear something important.

Maybe I'm not ready to hear you say that your marriage was a mistake

or that you still have feelings for me.

- I didn't say that-- - [yells]

I said I don't wanna hear it.

Look...

[sighs] I got a nice life going, Brock.

Everything used to be crazy, one fiasco after the other.

And I don't want to go back to that.

You're goin' through a lot right now.

You're what my grandma used to call "a little teched in the head."

[laughing]

[laughs sarcastically] I've been diagnosed as depressed, you know.

Just because you're depressed

don't mean you can't have a sense of humor.

- Are you done? - All right, all right.

All I'm sayin' is,

before you go blurtin' out anything else,

just remember that Barbra Jean loves you with all her heart.

There's no accounting for taste, but she does.

Yeah, well, I love her too, Reba. I'm just...

I'm goin' through something. But don't worry.

When Barbra Jean gets back, we'll sit down, have a nice long talk.

Good.

Now I'm sure in a day or two everything will be the same between you and her.

Lucky for you, the simple are forgiving.

[scoffs]

Hey, Jake, whatcha doin'?

Playing a video game...

and watching TV.

I'm multitasking.

Well, look. Since you're here, let me ask you somethin'.

Do you think things have been a little messed up around here lately?

It's not my fault. Van did it.

Did what?

Made a big mess in my room and didn't clean it up.

Stupid Van.

But that's it? Nothing with Barbra Jean and your dad?

You mean Mr... [imitates Van] Hot?

Go clean your room.

- Hey, Reba. - Hey.

I just came over to let you know

I'm at peace.

Good. What's that like?

I feel like I just walked through a portal

and left all my cares and concerns on the other side.

Hmm. Well, be sure and pick 'em up on your way out.

I don't want a lot of cares and concerns in my front yard. [laughs]

- [chuckles] Oh, you. - Yeah.

[sighs]

Well, you're really in a good mood. I guess you talked to Brock.

- Not yet. - I think you should.

- I don't need to. - You might.

I'm kicking him out.

[laughing]

Oh, you. [continues laughing]

I'm serious.

I know. I'm just laughin' at my life.

- So, you're really gonna kick Brock out? - Oh, yeah.

Bye-bye, blondie.

I hate to sound judgmental, but you know that's crazy.

[scoffs] No, Reba.

Spending last summer learning Portuguese, because it was going to be

the universal language of the future was crazy.

Trying to train bees to eat hamburger out of my hand was crazy.

Kickin' Brock out is a smart move.

[speaking Spanish]

I don't get it. This doesn't sound like somethin' you'd do.

I know!

Reba, I had a revelation.

I was driving around...

lonely and feeling sorry for myself...

when I went by this church.

And it hit me.

I wasn't alone in this world.

Yeah, I know. You're not.

So I asked myself,

"W.W.R.D.?"

What would Reba do?

[laughing] No, no, no, no, no, Barbra Jean.

No. No, no, no, no, no, no.

That's a bad question.

Oh, Reba. No, it's not.

You're the woman Brock respects most in this world,

next to Jennifer Garner of Alias.

No. No, no.

No. But, Barbra Jean, I would not kick Brock out.

And if I were in your position,

I would march right over there, apologize and make up to my husband.

- Oh, no, you wouldn't. - Yes, I would.

- No, you wouldn't. - [chuckling]

Maybe.

Reba, you would kick Brock out until he gets his head on straight.

And then maybe, just maybe, you'd take him back.

Yeah, but I've got anger issues.

Look, Reba, I love my husband, and I don't wanna lose him.

But I'm not gonna settle for "he might want me."

I'm not gonna take whatever he decides to give me.

I deserve better than that.

Yeah, you do, Barbra Jean.

Thank you.

See?

- I do know you. - Mm-hmm.

I'm in your head.

You know what you're gonna do next, don't you?

Ask you to leave so I can go lie down?

Nope. You're gonna give me a hug.

- No. No. - Yeah. Come on.

- [groans] - Come on.

Okay. Okay.

It was then they realized that neither of them needed a man.

Oh!

You guys, guess what.

I'm kicking Brock out.

Barbra Jean!

Well, they're gonna find out eventually.

Yeah, but they shouldn't know before Brock does.

[scoffs] See?

I knew you'd say that.

- She's not really kicking him out, is she? - I don't know.

She could. I mean, you know how the old saying goes.

"If you love something, set it free."

Or cripple it so it can't get away.

Knock, knock!

Hey, Kyra, you're doing the dishes.

Hey, Van, you're bothering me.

No, it's just... you're doing a chore.

I never thought of you as the type that helps.

So, you're doing this whole "cleany-uppy thingy"

'cause of all the tension?

No, I just want to soak in this detergent so my hands will be youthful again.

Oh, Kyra. Sweet, sweet, vulnerable Kyra.

[sighing] Clean dishes won't keep Daddy at home.

Nope.

What is wrong with you, specific to this moment?

Are you sayin' there's no tension here?

Barbra Jean didn't just come back and kick Dad out?

What?

Yeah. She was just over at Reba Nell's.

She was screaming and throwing stuff,

swearing she was gonna set him free or cripple him.

- Really? - Oh, yeah.

It was pretty dramatic.

Well, I haven't seen Barbra Jean in a couple hours.

- Do you think that's a good sign? - I don't know. Maybe it is.

Maybe she just needed time to think about it.

She'll come back when she feels better, and Dad will never find out.

- Find out what? - Dad!

Van, Cheyenne. So what happened? Did she do it?

- Did she do what? - [gasps] Brock!

- [laughs] - Something is obviously going on,

but they won't tell me what it is.

[sighs] Brock, I don't think I should be the one to tell you.

'Cause it's big, man.

It is big.

Reba, if it's big, and it involves who I think it might,

you know, a little advance warning might help me to prepare.

[chuckles]

Oh, boy.

Reba, please?

Okay, fine. I'll tell you.

But one of these days, I'm gonna get remarried.

I'm gonna stick you in these situations.

[chuckling] Okay.

[mouths, inaudible]

Reba.

Barbra Jean came over earlier, and she said...

[sighs]

she's gonna ask you to leave.

- What? - Yeah.

Why would she say that? That doesn't sound like her. That--

That sounds like you.

I know it! I can't help it! She's in my head!

Ah, all right, let's just hold on a second here.

I mean, did you ever stop

and think that maybe she was just trying to impress you?

Maybe this is just the kick in the pants that we need

to start addressing our issues.

There you go.

Barbra Jean just needs to know that I still wanna work on our marriage.

Everything else will take care of itself from there.

Dad, Barbra Jean's at home. She said she wants to see you.

She does?

Oh, well, that's great.

You know what? This... This silliness has gone on long enough.

- Did y'all get all that? - Yep.

And you know what? I think Dad's right.

He's gonna talk to her, and everything's gonna be okay.

Yeah, I mean, who wouldn't want to be married to Mr. H?

Oh, yeah. My bad.

[mouths, inaudible]

[knocking on door]

- Well? - It was great.

Yeah. Yeah, we sat down, had a long heart-to-heart,

and then she kicked me out.

Well, you're a strong man. You'll get through this.

You did with me.

I'm sorry. You okay?

- Well, I will be. - Come on in.

- I'll get a couple of beers. - Thanks, Reba.

They're for me.

You can't drink. You're gonna have to drive to a cheap motel.

I still don't know why I married either one of 'em.

[theme music playing]