Original subtitles

Here are pictures from the day when you arrived in Malmö.

I would like you to see if you recognize any faces.

If I recognise anybody...

I see my boat coming in... to Sweden and Malmö.

There were a lot of ships coming in, I don't know which one I was on.

I keep looking if there is anybody I recognise.

It was so exciting, everything. I'd never been on a big boat like that.

I was nine years old.

That's the parcels we were given for the journey.

Red Cross parcels...

But I didn't know what it was, I only knew that it was heavy.

And we had to walk a long way with this parcel.

And I found it so hard, I really wanted to throw it away.

And my mother said: "No, no, you have to carry it with you."

That was our provisions for the journey.

You see they're all carrying these parcels.

And giving us some sweets to welcome you here...

Oh, that was me!

That's me!

Gosh...

Oh, I didn't reckon with that...

I recognise the coat.

It was a beige woollen spring coat,

that I had on when we left Lodz ghetto.

I don't remember the blanket.

But that's me.

My mother should be somewhere here too.

I think that might be my mother, in the corner there.

Because I wouldn't be that far away from her.

That's definitely her.

When we first talked about being liberated,

I thought that was another story my mother told me to make me happier.

There I am again.

That's the first time I've seen that crowd smile.

Look at that...

We were together in Ravensbrück.

On the right, you see Sara Nowak. The second one I don't know.

The third one is my mother and the fourth one is Rusjka.

I remember her very well.

She did something she wasn't supposed to and she was beaten very severely.

I remember her screaming.

I remember that very vividly.

They look relaxed, don't they?

They're breathing out.

The worst is over.

I didn't know whether it was true or not.

I was four when I went into the ghetto and that's all I knew.

People were free and they walked around...

Everything was unreal, I didn't know what to make of it.

It was just a new world for me.

I saw that everybody seemed happy, so I decided to be happy too.

Oh, my God...

All those people!

I don't remember seeing all these people.

Then of course, we couldn't remember anything...

but just being happy.

We didn't have the crosses like that.

I have big shoes.

One was one colour, one was the other.

One was like a boot, the other was like a half-shoe...

And they had holes.

I had gotten them when I was in a camp, for a ration of bread.

Oh, my goodness, that's me over there.

See, somebody gave me a coat to put on and a scarf.

Oh, my gosh...

I know what I was feeling.

"Is this true?"

There I'm thinking: "Can this be true?"

I don't know who the other ladies are.

See, even that little girl, she's so happy.

When they gave us food to eat, we were crying and eating at the same time.

Because we couldn't believe that we're having something to eat,

that somebody could do that for us.

Smiles, which we didn't see at all anywhere.

Nobody smiled at us ever, you know, in the camp.

It was a huge mistake. It should have never happened.

That was a huge mistake.

I'm an Italian American, a Roman Catholic, born in New York City.

From the States I went to Italy, to visit my grandparents.

It was just a visit. My father stayed on because his parents were very ill,

so he wanted to take care of them.

This was in 1939.

When Italy came at war in 1941, we were stuck there.

We couldn't travel anymore.

And when the Germans advanced from the southern part of Italy to the north,

they came and arrested my father and I.

"Why are you taking us? Why are we being imprisoned?"

"We're Americans, we're visiting my grandmother."

I said that so many times: "I'm an American girl."

That's when my father said: "Don't worry, things will be better tomorrow."

"They know it's a mistake, they'll let us go free."

But it never happened.

The Nazis thought we were spies...

and they took us away.

We were put on the boxcars and taken to Auschwitz.

An unbelievable world...

There's one thing which I'm very curious about...

You sent this picture, how did you know where to find me?

Because in the list, I was written as an Argentinean.

You should have looked for me in Argentina.

- But I was not called Nurit Stern. - That's true.

Can I show you the archive film?

Not interested...

Because it's related to the war,

and I don't want to remember this.

The only thing I am willing to talk about is this moment of liberation.

That's the point I remember and I want to remember.

- Is this the ship we came on? - It might be.

This I know, this girl...

That's me. Here... That's me.

Waiting to go into the tent.

Here I am.

I was 14.

- You look very happy here. - Yeah. I probably was very happy.

I'm wearing a very expensive coat, some kind of duffel coat.

Which was very warm, it was pure wool.

Everybody looks happy there.

Even the lady in the background has a smile on her face.

A hidden smile, but a smile.

This is Rosetta, who was a very dear friend of my mother in the camp.

But I am looking for my mother,

who is supposed to be beside me, but I can't see her.

That's me again, in the background.

I was very upset that I had to get rid of my clothes.

Because I bought it for my bread.

For a portion of bread, I bought my dress.

I bought my coat for bread, otherwise I would have frozen to death.

Everybody had his little package of private belongings.

Most of them we had to burn,

together with all the clothes we were wearing.

Oh, here she is. That's my mother.

Smiling and happy.

Very relieved, because she really was afraid.

She didn't want to go.

I nearly left her behind in the camp,

because I was determined to go.

You told me you don't want to remember. Does this mean you have the memories...

- But you don't want to talk about them? - Right.

- Are they never coming up? - I try not to let them come up.

I am fighting them.

What else do you want to know?

Now I've been able to put your name on a face.

It's okay...

It's your contribution.

I'm glad I contributed to it.

That's you!

- I'm putting my glasses on... - You were very cute.

Here is where... That is me, and there is you.

Yes. See how happy we look?

We just look like cute little children

that were coming home or they were meeting somebody.

It looks to me like I'm somewhere in-between happy and frightened.

A mixture of hope, a mixture of relief,

and a mixture of "can I trust this?" and some fear.

Looking at Anita, she seems more clearly hopeful and happy.

Look at that face! I think I was happy, just plain happy.

I was just ashamed that I didn't have any hair.

Why do these other women have hair?

- I don't remember you not having hair. - They shaved my...

That was the first thing they did when we got to Ravensbrück.

Funny, I don't remember you without hair.

We were together all the time throughout the war.

In Krakow, when the Nazis marched in,

Mother and Father decided that we should flee,

and they sent us away.

After that, it was just a personal escaping all the time.

Hiding, escaping, not being visible.

We separated ourselves consciously. We kept to ourselves.

We didn't communicate much with anybody else.

There's a magical belief which is not unique to me, it's what children believe,

if you don't see somebody else, then that person doesn't see you.

And to be seen during all those years in the war, was deadly.

I spent years dressed as a girl.

Because it was very dangerous that people would see that I was not a girl.

- That you were a Jewish boy. - No other boys were circumcised.

He was so cute! He looked like Shirley Temple.

She was Aneta Ziemiańska and I was Bernadeta Ziemiańska.

Then that was the state I lived in from the year of three.

I did not think at all about "where are my parents, why are they not with me?"

I was not yearning to see them.

I did not know what it would mean if they were living.

I didn't know what it would mean to be with them.

They were lost.

So it was a surprise to me to discover

that magically, both my parents were living.

They came to Sweden... 1947.

I remember at the sanatorium, because I was in bed,

they wouldn't let me out of bed...

And the people there, the nurses and staff and so on, knew about this,

so they were gathering around to see this passionately emotional reunion...

None of us reacted that way. "Who are these people?"

My parents didn't react that way. "Who is this child?"

To be seen, to be looked upon, was a new experience.

It was an odd and really disturbing experience.

I did not want to see that they saw me.

So when I look at my face, I see exactly that.

I was very focused on not looking like someone who was confused

and didn't know anything. For of course I didn't, I had no idea where I was.

I didn't know where I was for a long time.

I have no idea what this is.

I think you're entering the sanitation tent.

No, we didn't...

Is that... that's me!

That's me. Oh, my God...

My heavens...

Oh, jeez, I didn't know that...

He's checking on everything...

I don't like to be touched

because I had a bad experience with the doctors over there.

See, I was reluctant. I didn't like the idea that he's touching me.

You see?

I didn't want to be touched.

We got underwear.

And shirts.

Oh, my gosh...

They're checking our numbers, you see.

I thought many times, "why am I here?"

It's something I couldn't figure out. "What am I doing here?"

"I am the only American girl in Auschwitz."

All that time I kept on saying to myself:

"I will survive. I will be free."

"You will not break me."

I kept on saying that, trying to believe it.

"I'd like to see my mother, my parents... I want to see Toni again."

Toni was my fiancé.

We were engaged to be married.

We met because I lived in Lussinpiccolo,

and Toni went to school there.

After, they would be sitting at the café.

And I would have to pass by.

Sometimes they would whistle at me.

Or Toni would get up

right away and join me, to go back home.

And he would escort me to my home.

He was dark, he had green eyes.

Dark lashes and dark wavy hair.

Tall. Very intelligent.

Very kind.

Everything a young girl would want in a man, in a husband.

I know he must have been thinking about me, he didn't know where I was.

We didn't know where we were, neither one of us.

I later found out he was on a ship, he was captain on a ship.

And the ship was torpedoed. I think two or three times, they told me.

They found them in the water.

He was only 22.

I think about him a lot.

I do.

I think of what it could have been, and what it was at one time.

I hadn't met anybody that I... since then... or until then

somebody that I really cared for.

Okay, Mr Jackson... This is Malmö, April 28, 1945.

Malmö... It's arrival in Sweden.

- Yeah? - Yes.

There's absolutely no reason that I should know somebody in there.

I mean, it's a mix of very different groups arriving.

And this is the Norwegian group.

And here's a new group.

That's my mother.

So how does it feel to see your mother in this film?

It's interesting.

- How does she look? - As she did at that time, I can't tell you...

In that situation, what can you read in her face?

Nothing.

It's not the obvious happiness of being liberated.

No.

At that time she didn't know what had happened to her husband and to her son,

she had no great reason to rejoice... yet.

The three of us should have been killed all three,

because we were active in the resistance network.

We were involved in Intelligence in Paris,

and we have been rather highly decorated under the French military,

which is also the case of my being here, you see.

That is with the medals.

Legion of Honour, Croix de Guerre and Médaille des Déportés.

Both my mother and I are officers of the Legion of Honour,

which is quite a high French decoration.

My mother probably knew it was dangerous, but she accepted to do it.

I did not realise the full scope of the danger.

That at the other end there was a death camp.

I was 15.

- When she's here, where are you? - With my father, in Lübeck.

We were prisoners.

And we were embarked on the Thielbek on May 2.

The Germans shoved about 1,000 people fore, and 1,000 aft.

The ship was bombed with rockets and machine-gun fire, and sank.

Very few, including myself, escaped.

My father was probably killed or wounded by a bomb or a rocket.

Or he survived out of the ship and got exhausted from swimming.

I will never know. It's not important.

He's dead since May 3, 1945 and nothing will change it.

For several days I went along the beach to see if I could find his body.

I never did. There were so many bodies anyway, it was hopeless.

Did you ask your mother what she went through?

I don't remember, but I don't think so.

- Did she ever talk about it? - No.

She knew that we had done things probably not the same, but quite parallel,

so it was useless, several years after, to discuss them.

- Why was it useless? - What the hell would the use be!

- But sometimes... - Useless means "no use".

I'll tell you another story. I had a son.

Who, at the age of 19, contracted leukaemia,

which is one of the worst forms of cancer.

One day I was travelling with him in my car and he said:

"Father, do you think about death?"

Well, at first I took it as a blow...

"What am I going to tell this young fellow

who knows that he is condemned by his leukaemia?"

"What in the hell am I going to tell him?"

I tried to reason as quickly as I could. I said: "You know, Olivier..."

"For me, I have lived with death over one year in camp."

"I had death in the morning, in the night, in the day. I had death all the time."

"Death for me is an old friend, an old mistress."

"I've gone to sleep with death so many times that it doesn't affect me."

"So death for me is commonplace. Just something that's going to happen."

He pondered for a while and said: "I think about death all the time."

What can you tell a boy of 19 who knows he's going to die?

Difficult...

Let's go down, we must go now...

Oh, my God...!

There I am again. See that?

Oh, my God...

When I saw all the water coming down...

I was happy.

Do you see me?

Oh, my God...

To have the water coming down on you was beautiful...

I was so happy washing and I was happy with the water falling on me.

To be clean...

That was a wonderful feeling!

"I'm a free spirit."

"I can go where I want, do what I want."

"Nobody will tell me what to do anymore." That's how I felt.

"Here I am, and I'm free!"

Oh, what a beautiful day!

This is really the moment of my liberation.

It's so... I don't know how to describe anything, it's so unbelievable.

You know, you can't think this would ever happen.

That one day I would be seeing this on film and talking about it.

I had no idea that pictures were taken.

I don't even remember seeing anybody.

I just happened to be looking around

and seeing all the people knowing that we're free.

Knowing that we are human beings.

That we are somebody.

Someone with hearts...

and with names.