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1
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I am not a prophet.
2
00:00:04,813 --> 00:00:06,950
But sometimes
I have prophetic dreams.
3
00:00:06,951 --> 00:00:09,954
Like the one where I was
at a garden party.
4
00:00:17,395 --> 00:00:19,430
Excuse me.
5
00:00:19,431 --> 00:00:22,200
Everyone, I have
a brief announcement to make.
6
00:00:22,201 --> 00:00:25,336
Jesus was black,
Ronald Reagan was the devil,
7
00:00:25,337 --> 00:00:27,138
and the government
is lyin' about 9/11.
8
00:00:27,139 --> 00:00:31,244
Thank you for your time
and good night.
9
00:00:31,878 --> 00:00:34,179
No!
10
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That can't be true!
11
00:00:43,190 --> 00:00:44,226
Unhand me!
12
00:00:44,826 --> 00:00:45,927
Hi-ya!
13
00:00:48,630 --> 00:00:49,697
He's on fire!
14
00:00:49,698 --> 00:00:50,733
Somebody get some water.
15
00:00:52,034 --> 00:00:53,302
Ow!
16
00:00:53,303 --> 00:00:55,136
Mm-hm. You havin' that dream
where you made
17
00:00:55,137 --> 00:00:56,672
the white people riot,
weren't ya?
18
00:00:56,673 --> 00:00:58,340
But I was tellin' the truth!
19
00:00:58,341 --> 00:01:01,110
How many times have I told you,
you better not even dream
20
00:01:01,111 --> 00:01:02,711
about tellin' white folk
the truth?
21
00:01:02,712 --> 00:01:03,647
You understand me?
22
00:01:03,648 --> 00:01:04,981
Shoot.
23
00:01:04,982 --> 00:01:07,084
Makin' white people riot.
24
00:01:07,085 --> 00:01:09,686
You better learn
how to lie like me.
25
00:01:09,687 --> 00:01:12,557
I'm gonna find me a white man
and lie to him right now.
26
00:01:14,460 --> 00:01:16,427
♪ I am the stone
The builder refused ♪
27
00:01:16,428 --> 00:01:18,329
♪ I am the visual
The inspiration ♪
28
00:01:18,330 --> 00:01:19,830
♪ That made lady
Sing the blues ♪
29
00:01:19,831 --> 00:01:21,700
♪ I'm the spark
That makes your idea bright ♪
30
00:01:21,701 --> 00:01:23,269
♪ The same spark
That lights the dark ♪
31
00:01:23,270 --> 00:01:25,271
♪ So that you can know
Your left from your right ♪
32
00:01:25,272 --> 00:01:27,540
♪ I am the ballot in your box
The bullet in the gun ♪
33
00:01:27,541 --> 00:01:29,076
♪ The inner glow
That lets you know ♪
34
00:01:29,077 --> 00:01:30,410
♪ To call your brother sun ♪
35
00:01:30,411 --> 00:01:31,712
♪ The story that just begun ♪
36
00:01:31,713 --> 00:01:33,079
♪ The promise
Of what's to come ♪
37
00:01:33,080 --> 00:01:34,314
♪ And I'm a remain a soldier ♪
38
00:01:34,315 --> 00:01:36,350
♪ Till the war is won ♪
39
00:01:36,351 --> 00:01:38,853
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
40
00:01:38,854 --> 00:01:41,522
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
41
00:01:41,523 --> 00:01:44,159
♪ Chop, chop, chop
Judo flip ♪
42
00:01:44,160 --> 00:01:45,428
♪ Chop, chop, chop ♪
43
00:01:46,896 --> 00:01:48,998
♪ Work it out, yeah♪
44
00:01:51,469 --> 00:01:54,037
♪ Everybody work that body
Move your body ♪
45
00:01:54,038 --> 00:01:56,073
♪ To the beat ♪
46
00:01:56,074 --> 00:01:58,743
♪ Everybody move that body ♪
47
00:01:58,744 --> 00:02:00,344
♪ Oh, yeeeaaah ♪
48
00:02:00,345 --> 00:02:01,612
♪ Yeah ♪
49
00:02:03,082 --> 00:02:05,784
Sorry, Billy Blanks,
but why buy the tape
50
00:02:05,785 --> 00:02:07,986
when you can get
the infomercial for free?
51
00:02:07,987 --> 00:02:08,989
Whew!
52
00:02:17,230 --> 00:02:19,900
What the hell?
53
00:02:19,901 --> 00:02:22,036
Boys!
54
00:02:25,407 --> 00:02:27,642
Would one of y'all like
to explain this?
55
00:02:27,643 --> 00:02:28,843
Uh...
56
00:02:28,844 --> 00:02:32,013
You mean, the orange juice
or the miniskirt?
57
00:02:32,014 --> 00:02:34,450
Which one of y'all drank
the last glass of orange juice?
58
00:02:34,451 --> 00:02:36,852
That's the last full day's
supply of vitamin C.
59
00:02:36,853 --> 00:02:38,921
What am I supposed to do
about my vitamin C now?
60
00:02:38,922 --> 00:02:41,892
Y'all need to start
appreciatin' your granddaddy.
61
00:02:41,893 --> 00:02:43,460
I went and spent
your inheritance
62
00:02:43,461 --> 00:02:45,862
on this beautiful house
in this neighborhood.
63
00:02:45,863 --> 00:02:47,397
And all I ask you to do
64
00:02:47,398 --> 00:02:48,733
is act like you got some class.
65
00:02:48,734 --> 00:02:50,501
Hey, what's class?
66
00:02:50,502 --> 00:02:52,270
It means don't act
like niggas.
67
00:02:52,271 --> 00:02:54,872
S-see? That's what
I'm talkin' about right there.
68
00:02:54,873 --> 00:02:56,776
We don't use the N-word
in this house.
69
00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:59,577
Granddad, you said the word
"nigga" 46 times yesterday.
70
00:02:59,578 --> 00:03:00,546
I counted.
71
00:03:00,547 --> 00:03:01,613
Nigga, hush.
72
00:03:01,614 --> 00:03:02,782
Now, you may not like it,
73
00:03:02,783 --> 00:03:04,984
but I moved y'all out here
74
00:03:04,985 --> 00:03:06,585
to expand your horizon.
75
00:03:06,586 --> 00:03:08,955
There's a new white man
out here.
76
00:03:08,956 --> 00:03:09,956
He's refined.
77
00:03:09,957 --> 00:03:11,758
For example, did you know
78
00:03:11,759 --> 00:03:13,927
that the new white man
loves gourmet cheese?
79
00:03:13,928 --> 00:03:14,895
Wait.
80
00:03:14,896 --> 00:03:17,632
I'm sorry,
did you say cheese?
81
00:03:17,633 --> 00:03:18,967
Yep, cheese.
82
00:03:18,968 --> 00:03:21,236
You give the meanest white man
a piece of cheese,
83
00:03:21,237 --> 00:03:22,938
and he turn into Mr. Rogers.
84
00:03:22,939 --> 00:03:24,606
Granddad,
that doesn't make sense.
85
00:03:24,607 --> 00:03:25,809
Don't you talk back to me.
86
00:03:25,810 --> 00:03:27,176
Granddad, you can't tame
87
00:03:27,177 --> 00:03:29,479
the white supremacist
power structure with cheese!
88
00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,113
Oh, yes, I can!
No, you can't!
89
00:03:31,114 --> 00:03:32,749
Yes, I can!
No, you can not!
90
00:03:32,750 --> 00:03:33,750
Cheese.
91
00:03:33,751 --> 00:03:34,818
How can somebody that old
92
00:03:34,819 --> 00:03:37,220
say somethin' that stupid?
93
00:03:37,221 --> 00:03:39,122
I know about white people too.
94
00:03:39,123 --> 00:03:40,492
Like, when they talk,
95
00:03:40,493 --> 00:03:46,331
they say the whole word, like this.
96
00:03:46,332 --> 00:03:49,668
Why'd he even move us out here?
97
00:03:49,669 --> 00:03:51,736
Probably did it
just to make us miserable.
98
00:03:51,737 --> 00:03:54,040
And white people take time out to study.
99
00:03:54,041 --> 00:03:55,843
I hate this place.
100
00:03:55,844 --> 00:03:59,546
And white people arrest you.
101
00:03:59,547 --> 00:04:00,780
Man.
102
00:04:03,619 --> 00:04:04,620
Hey!
103
00:04:07,556 --> 00:04:09,626
Looks like the feds.
104
00:04:18,436 --> 00:04:20,470
Who the hell could be
knockin' on this door
105
00:04:20,471 --> 00:04:22,071
this early in the mornin'?
106
00:04:22,072 --> 00:04:24,608
If it's a Jehovah Witness,
I'm kickin' his ass.
107
00:04:24,609 --> 00:04:25,643
Yes?
108
00:04:25,644 --> 00:04:28,045
I'm looking for Robert Freeman.
109
00:04:28,046 --> 00:04:29,714
I'm Robert Freeman.
110
00:04:29,715 --> 00:04:31,917
I'm Ed Wuncler.
111
00:04:31,918 --> 00:04:34,154
From Wuncler's
Savings and Loan.
112
00:04:34,953 --> 00:04:36,755
Uh, so?
113
00:04:36,756 --> 00:04:40,026
I own the bank
that owns your house.
114
00:04:40,027 --> 00:04:41,027
Oh, well...
115
00:04:41,028 --> 00:04:42,361
Come in, sir.
116
00:04:42,362 --> 00:04:44,064
Welcome to your house.
117
00:04:47,936 --> 00:04:53,941
Robert, my family founded
Woodcrest over 170 years ago.
118
00:04:53,942 --> 00:04:57,779
I was born here,
and I still live here.
119
00:04:57,780 --> 00:05:00,849
I consider this place
to be family,
120
00:05:00,850 --> 00:05:03,118
and I'm very selective
121
00:05:03,119 --> 00:05:07,322
about who I allow
in to that family.
122
00:05:07,323 --> 00:05:09,292
You understand
what I'm saying, Robert?
123
00:05:09,293 --> 00:05:12,762
Hey, yes,
I totally understand.
124
00:05:12,763 --> 00:05:13,964
Would you like some...
125
00:05:13,965 --> 00:05:15,834
cheese?
126
00:05:16,701 --> 00:05:19,237
Did you just offer me cheese?
127
00:05:19,238 --> 00:05:20,239
Yes, I did.
128
00:05:22,073 --> 00:05:24,576
I'd love some cheese, thank you.
129
00:05:24,577 --> 00:05:25,778
Hm.
130
00:05:25,779 --> 00:05:27,179
Riley!
131
00:05:27,180 --> 00:05:28,780
Go get the fancy cheese.
132
00:05:28,781 --> 00:05:32,953
I'd like to ask some questions,
if you don't mind.
133
00:05:32,954 --> 00:05:36,623
Are you gay, and if so,
do you have a gay lover
134
00:05:36,624 --> 00:05:40,127
living with you in the house?
135
00:05:40,128 --> 00:05:42,997
Gay? No, I'm not gay.
136
00:05:42,998 --> 00:05:44,966
I mean, I happen to think
a man looks nice
137
00:05:44,967 --> 00:05:47,134
with good hair and a ponytail.
138
00:05:47,135 --> 00:05:49,470
But, no, mm-mm, I'm not gay.
139
00:05:49,471 --> 00:05:52,107
What's your position
on gay marriage?
140
00:05:52,108 --> 00:05:53,476
Well, first of all,
141
00:05:53,477 --> 00:05:55,645
I believe all marriage
is wrong.
142
00:05:59,082 --> 00:06:01,185
Good one, good.
143
00:06:01,186 --> 00:06:03,753
Uh, you don't look
like you associate
144
00:06:03,754 --> 00:06:06,190
with any Muslims,
Arabs, you know.
145
00:06:06,191 --> 00:06:08,694
People of terrorist descent?
146
00:06:10,363 --> 00:06:12,464
Uh, well...
147
00:06:12,465 --> 00:06:13,798
We got Kraft,
148
00:06:13,799 --> 00:06:15,535
and we got Velveeta.
149
00:06:19,105 --> 00:06:20,439
Your grandson?
150
00:06:21,608 --> 00:06:23,343
Afraid so. Ahem.
151
00:06:24,512 --> 00:06:27,180
You know, I have a grandson too.
He's...
152
00:06:27,181 --> 00:06:28,614
Is that right?
153
00:06:28,615 --> 00:06:29,684
Well, heh-heh-heh,
154
00:06:29,685 --> 00:06:31,518
this has been delightful.
155
00:06:31,519 --> 00:06:34,021
Well, it's really been
a pleasure, Mr., uh...
156
00:06:34,022 --> 00:06:35,255
I-Own-Everything.
157
00:06:35,256 --> 00:06:36,358
We should get together soon
158
00:06:36,359 --> 00:06:38,827
and have, uh...
more cheese.
159
00:06:38,828 --> 00:06:40,896
Like a nice Brie
or a G-Gouda...
160
00:06:40,897 --> 00:06:42,263
G-Gayda- Gouda.
161
00:06:42,264 --> 00:06:45,334
Heh. You know, you're
my kind of guy, Freeman.
162
00:06:45,335 --> 00:06:46,870
Old school.
163
00:06:47,838 --> 00:06:49,238
What are you doin' tomorrow?
164
00:06:49,239 --> 00:06:50,506
We're throwin' a garden party
165
00:06:50,507 --> 00:06:52,242
for my grandson.
166
00:06:52,243 --> 00:06:54,345
He just got back from Iraq.
167
00:06:54,346 --> 00:06:57,648
You should stop by,
meet some of the neighbors.
168
00:06:57,649 --> 00:06:58,950
Bring the kids.
169
00:06:58,951 --> 00:07:00,952
Sounds like a splendid idea.
170
00:07:00,953 --> 00:07:02,087
I'll see you tomorrow.
171
00:07:02,088 --> 00:07:03,388
Uh, thanks for stoppin' by.
172
00:07:03,389 --> 00:07:05,190
Cheers.
173
00:07:08,695 --> 00:07:10,462
Huey!
174
00:07:10,463 --> 00:07:12,098
This damn thing looks real.
175
00:07:12,099 --> 00:07:13,901
Can I have my gun back?
176
00:07:15,669 --> 00:07:16,770
Son of a-!
177
00:07:17,738 --> 00:07:19,406
A garden party?
178
00:07:19,407 --> 00:07:20,608
Yeah, boy.
179
00:07:20,609 --> 00:07:22,210
I might buy sandals
and new underwear.
180
00:07:22,211 --> 00:07:24,278
Oh, you shot me!
181
00:07:24,279 --> 00:07:27,048
Granddad tried
to assassinate me.
182
00:07:27,049 --> 00:07:30,286
Boy, what did I tell ya?
This is the new white man.
183
00:07:30,287 --> 00:07:32,320
He's distinguished.
184
00:07:32,321 --> 00:07:35,391
Granddad, I do not sip tea
with the enemy.
185
00:07:35,392 --> 00:07:37,093
You could force me to go,
186
00:07:37,094 --> 00:07:39,629
but you cannot force me
to be someone I'm not.
187
00:07:39,630 --> 00:07:42,064
The hell I can't!
188
00:07:42,065 --> 00:07:44,135
You gonna go and you're
not gonna embarrass me
189
00:07:44,136 --> 00:07:46,471
in front of my new neighbors,
or I'm gonna beat your ass.
190
00:07:46,472 --> 00:07:49,707
Why can't we be ourselves, huh?
Why can't I be me?
191
00:07:49,708 --> 00:07:51,610
Are you ashamed of us?
Very.
192
00:07:51,611 --> 00:07:53,111
We never asked to move here
193
00:07:53,112 --> 00:07:55,581
with your precious
new white people, Granddad.
194
00:07:55,582 --> 00:07:56,548
Didn't ask?
195
00:07:56,549 --> 00:07:57,650
Well, you didn't ask for us
196
00:07:57,651 --> 00:07:59,284
to be attacked
by dogs and fire hoses,
197
00:07:59,285 --> 00:08:00,987
so you can live here,
but we did it anyway.
198
00:08:00,988 --> 00:08:03,923
Oh, here he go again with
the dogs and the fire hoses.
199
00:08:03,924 --> 00:08:06,460
Shoot, we were attacked
by dogs and fire hoses.
200
00:08:06,461 --> 00:08:07,896
Were you attacked?
201
00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,931
I-I don't know what difference
that makes.
202
00:08:10,932 --> 00:08:13,000
Because it's like
the whole generation
203
00:08:13,001 --> 00:08:15,770
tries to take credit for
what happened to some people.
204
00:08:15,771 --> 00:08:17,672
That's ridiculous.
205
00:08:17,673 --> 00:08:19,342
Now, see-
Well, you know...
206
00:08:19,343 --> 00:08:21,143
Uh, what had happened was...
207
00:08:22,846 --> 00:08:24,647
Get out of here.
Go, go, go!
208
00:08:24,648 --> 00:08:26,650
Come on, get out of here.
209
00:08:26,651 --> 00:08:28,152
Aw, man.
210
00:08:28,153 --> 00:08:30,453
I missed it.
Was it bad?
211
00:08:30,454 --> 00:08:32,322
Did they do the thing
with the fire hoses?
212
00:08:32,323 --> 00:08:34,258
What do you think, chump?
213
00:08:34,259 --> 00:08:35,927
Damn, what's eatin' you?
214
00:08:35,928 --> 00:08:37,962
A goddamn German shepherd,
that's what.
215
00:08:37,963 --> 00:08:38,930
Where was you?
216
00:08:38,931 --> 00:08:40,864
I-I had to go back
to the apartment
217
00:08:40,865 --> 00:08:42,100
'cause I forgot my raincoat.
218
00:08:42,101 --> 00:08:43,602
You went to-? You-?
219
00:08:43,603 --> 00:08:46,205
This nigga went to get
a motherfuckin' raincoat.
220
00:08:46,206 --> 00:08:47,706
I can't believe you.
221
00:08:47,707 --> 00:08:49,675
We all been watchin'
the same news.
222
00:08:49,676 --> 00:08:52,177
The police been doin'
this fire hose thing all week.
223
00:08:52,178 --> 00:08:54,014
I just assumed
we'd all wear our raincoat.
224
00:08:54,015 --> 00:08:55,215
Damn it, Robert.
225
00:08:55,216 --> 00:08:57,218
Who the hell comes
to a march with a raincoat?
226
00:08:57,219 --> 00:08:58,519
Bet you wish
you had a coat now.
227
00:08:58,520 --> 00:09:00,388
You son of a bitch!
228
00:09:00,389 --> 00:09:03,156
Remember what Dr. King said!
229
00:09:03,157 --> 00:09:05,561
Who actually got hit with
the fire hose ain't important.
230
00:09:05,562 --> 00:09:06,828
Now, we goin' to this party,
231
00:09:06,829 --> 00:09:09,631
and your black asses
are gonna behave.
232
00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:13,135
If I'm lucky, I'll find myself
a nice white woman
233
00:09:13,136 --> 00:09:16,005
with a flat booty
who'll listen to my problems.
234
00:09:27,086 --> 00:09:29,954
Now, the word for the day is "behave. "
235
00:09:29,955 --> 00:09:31,556
H-E-A-V-E.
236
00:09:31,557 --> 00:09:32,591
Behave.
237
00:09:32,592 --> 00:09:33,793
I'm comin', I'm comin'.
238
00:09:33,794 --> 00:09:36,229
Excuse me. Out of the way,
Kunta Kinte! Yes, sir.
239
00:09:36,230 --> 00:09:38,397
How can I help ya?
240
00:09:38,398 --> 00:09:39,966
Excuse me?
241
00:09:42,203 --> 00:09:45,439
Oh, Lord have mercy.
Security. Security.
242
00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:47,040
We got a Code Black.
243
00:09:47,041 --> 00:09:49,377
Code Black at the main gate.
244
00:09:49,378 --> 00:09:51,178
Ruckus, what the hell
245
00:09:51,179 --> 00:09:52,646
is a Code Black?
246
00:09:52,647 --> 00:09:54,215
There are some hungry-lookin'
247
00:09:54,216 --> 00:09:56,218
niggas at the front gate.
248
00:09:56,219 --> 00:09:57,553
What y'all doin' here?
249
00:09:57,554 --> 00:10:00,022
Deliveries are in the back.
250
00:10:00,023 --> 00:10:01,422
Well, my name is Robert Freeman,
251
00:10:01,423 --> 00:10:03,593
I was invited here
by Ed Wuncler.
252
00:10:03,594 --> 00:10:07,063
Well, I'm Ruckus.
Uncle Ruckus, no relation.
253
00:10:07,064 --> 00:10:09,299
And I work for Mr. Wuncler.
254
00:10:09,300 --> 00:10:10,734
And you slick niggas
255
00:10:10,735 --> 00:10:13,571
ain't gonna fast-talk your way
into this here party.
256
00:10:13,572 --> 00:10:15,539
Ruckus, what the hell
are you doing?
257
00:10:15,540 --> 00:10:16,474
Uh, Mr. Freeman,
258
00:10:16,475 --> 00:10:19,011
I'm sorry.
Please, come this way.
259
00:10:19,012 --> 00:10:20,245
See, boys?
260
00:10:20,246 --> 00:10:22,515
And you thought we'd be
the only black people.
261
00:11:08,368 --> 00:11:10,035
Robert!
262
00:11:11,904 --> 00:11:15,007
Glad you made it, Robert.
This is my grandson, Ed III.
263
00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:16,175
How are you?
264
00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:17,744
Whassup y'all, what's good?
265
00:11:19,213 --> 00:11:22,148
Uh... so I understand
you just got back from Iraq.
266
00:11:22,149 --> 00:11:23,217
For real?
267
00:11:23,218 --> 00:11:24,618
Yo, what's it like?
268
00:11:24,619 --> 00:11:26,920
What's it like?
269
00:11:26,921 --> 00:11:28,421
What I supposed
to say to that?
270
00:11:28,422 --> 00:11:30,791
It was cool, there was bitches?
271
00:11:30,792 --> 00:11:32,793
Okay, there was bitches,
but a lot of them had,
272
00:11:32,794 --> 00:11:34,429
you know, they was covered up
273
00:11:34,430 --> 00:11:36,330
in them curtains and stuff
they be wearin'.
274
00:11:36,331 --> 00:11:38,667
But I digress.
275
00:11:38,668 --> 00:11:40,302
It was war!
276
00:11:40,303 --> 00:11:41,804
It was war, basically.
277
00:11:41,805 --> 00:11:43,205
War, you know what that's like?
278
00:11:43,206 --> 00:11:44,773
Motherfuckers be,
like, shootin':
279
00:11:47,478 --> 00:11:48,879
Bombs blowin' up.
280
00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:50,380
And, you know,
the shit scared me.
281
00:11:50,381 --> 00:11:51,648
It scared the shit out of me.
282
00:11:51,649 --> 00:11:54,219
Matter of fact, I shit on myself
over a dozen times
283
00:11:54,220 --> 00:11:57,288
and ran out of toilet paper
after the second time.
284
00:11:57,289 --> 00:11:59,624
So you know
what that meant, right?
285
00:12:00,861 --> 00:12:03,763
I had to use the thumb, man.
It was kind of nasty.
286
00:12:03,764 --> 00:12:05,397
But, you know,
the good thing about it
287
00:12:05,398 --> 00:12:07,167
was they stopped taking me
out on patrol.
288
00:12:07,168 --> 00:12:08,768
'Cause my name
became "Stink Bomb. "
289
00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:10,036
You know what I'm sayin'?
290
00:12:10,037 --> 00:12:12,205
They said, you know,
I was giving away our position
291
00:12:12,206 --> 00:12:13,606
because of the shit smell.
292
00:12:13,607 --> 00:12:15,609
That was fine with me,
you know what I'm sayin'.
293
00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:17,111
They- They wanted
to leave me back.
294
00:12:17,112 --> 00:12:18,846
And I was like:
"Well, fuck y'all.
295
00:12:18,847 --> 00:12:21,415
"Y'all go ahead on 'cause
I don't need y'all anyway.
296
00:12:21,416 --> 00:12:23,553
I'm rich, bitch. "
297
00:12:27,190 --> 00:12:29,259
The fuck y'all looking at?
298
00:12:29,260 --> 00:12:31,128
Hey, li'I man.
299
00:12:32,696 --> 00:12:33,797
Like guns?
300
00:12:33,798 --> 00:12:35,265
Yeah!
301
00:12:35,266 --> 00:12:37,034
C'mon.
302
00:12:37,035 --> 00:12:39,270
Come on, let's get that drink.
303
00:12:46,111 --> 00:12:48,713
Well, you should definitely see The Passion.
304
00:12:48,714 --> 00:12:50,482
It's a very important movie.
305
00:12:50,483 --> 00:12:52,485
Couldn't see it.
White Jesus.
306
00:12:52,486 --> 00:12:54,120
Excuse me?
307
00:12:54,121 --> 00:12:55,354
Come on, man.
308
00:12:55,355 --> 00:12:58,391
It's supposed to be
all historically accurate,
309
00:12:58,392 --> 00:12:59,626
and they still have
a white man
310
00:12:59,627 --> 00:13:00,860
playin' Jesus?
311
00:13:00,861 --> 00:13:03,730
That's some old bullshit.
312
00:13:03,731 --> 00:13:06,201
Young man, you speak so well.
313
00:13:10,739 --> 00:13:11,673
Well,
314
00:13:11,674 --> 00:13:13,508
la-di-da-di-do.
315
00:13:13,509 --> 00:13:15,643
Look like we got us the winner
316
00:13:15,644 --> 00:13:18,914
of the Lucky-Nigga-of-the-Year
award.
317
00:13:20,516 --> 00:13:21,651
Ah.
318
00:13:21,652 --> 00:13:25,488
They must think
the sun shine out your ass.
319
00:13:25,489 --> 00:13:27,824
Mr. Wuncler's
been very nice, yes.
320
00:13:27,825 --> 00:13:31,028
They must think you
Sidney fucking Poitier.
321
00:13:31,029 --> 00:13:32,296
Well,
322
00:13:32,297 --> 00:13:34,865
I been workin'
for Mr. Wuncler for 20 years.
323
00:13:34,866 --> 00:13:37,703
I ain't never got invited
to the party.
324
00:13:37,704 --> 00:13:40,906
Shoot, he don't even let me
use the front door.
325
00:13:40,907 --> 00:13:42,474
But you wouldn't know
about that,
326
00:13:42,475 --> 00:13:45,745
now, would ya, Mr. Tibbs?
327
00:13:45,746 --> 00:13:47,546
Oh, yeah.
328
00:13:47,547 --> 00:13:49,916
They must think
your shit smell
329
00:13:49,917 --> 00:13:53,554
like spring daisies
and cinnamon.
330
00:13:54,588 --> 00:13:56,223
Check this out.
331
00:13:56,224 --> 00:13:57,291
Wow.
332
00:13:57,292 --> 00:14:00,461
Are those real?
333
00:14:00,462 --> 00:14:02,130
Real?
334
00:14:02,131 --> 00:14:03,798
Put it this way:
335
00:14:03,799 --> 00:14:07,202
if I pick one up
and put it to your face,
336
00:14:07,203 --> 00:14:09,739
pull the trigger,
will you be dead?
337
00:14:16,046 --> 00:14:17,214
And all I'm saying is,
338
00:14:17,215 --> 00:14:19,551
Ronald Reagan was the devil.
339
00:14:19,552 --> 00:14:23,388
You are such
an articulate young man.
340
00:14:23,389 --> 00:14:24,955
I'm tryin' to explain to you
341
00:14:24,956 --> 00:14:26,858
that Ronald Reagan was
the devil.
342
00:14:26,859 --> 00:14:28,794
Ronald Wilson Reagan.
343
00:14:28,795 --> 00:14:31,062
Each of his names
has six letters.
344
00:14:31,063 --> 00:14:32,731
Six-six-six.
345
00:14:32,732 --> 00:14:34,500
Man, doesn't that offend you?
346
00:14:34,501 --> 00:14:37,003
I love this kid.
347
00:14:37,004 --> 00:14:39,172
Stop that.
What are you doin'?
348
00:14:39,173 --> 00:14:40,508
Stop clappin'.
349
00:14:42,778 --> 00:14:44,111
Having a good time, Robert?
350
00:14:44,112 --> 00:14:45,780
I-It's, uh...
351
00:14:45,781 --> 00:14:48,282
Come on,
have a drink with me.
352
00:14:48,283 --> 00:14:50,452
You look nervous.
353
00:14:50,453 --> 00:14:54,723
Do I make you nervous,
Free-man?
354
00:14:54,724 --> 00:14:56,726
Nervous? No.
355
00:14:56,727 --> 00:15:00,462
I was just, uh, keepin' an eye
out for the boys.
356
00:15:00,463 --> 00:15:02,565
This is a lovely party.
357
00:15:02,566 --> 00:15:04,868
The only joy
I get from these parties
358
00:15:04,869 --> 00:15:07,737
is standing around,
telling mean-spirited jokes
359
00:15:07,738 --> 00:15:09,873
at other people's expense.
360
00:15:09,874 --> 00:15:11,643
I do that too.
361
00:15:11,644 --> 00:15:13,111
Check out that guy.
362
00:15:13,112 --> 00:15:17,548
Why is his face
all twisted up like that?
363
00:15:17,549 --> 00:15:20,052
Looks like he jacks off
with Icy Hot.
364
00:15:23,089 --> 00:15:26,126
He looks like
he just shit a gerbil.
365
00:15:30,265 --> 00:15:31,232
A gerbil.
366
00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:35,036
Sorry, I'll be right back.
367
00:15:37,606 --> 00:15:38,839
Tell me this,
368
00:15:38,840 --> 00:15:40,776
why was all the video recordin'
369
00:15:40,777 --> 00:15:43,011
of the Pentagon attack
seized by the FBI
370
00:15:43,012 --> 00:15:44,613
and never seen again?
371
00:15:44,614 --> 00:15:46,748
He speaks so well.
372
00:15:46,749 --> 00:15:48,084
He's adorable.
373
00:15:48,085 --> 00:15:49,352
Are you even listenin'
374
00:15:49,353 --> 00:15:51,187
to what I'm sayin'?
375
00:15:51,188 --> 00:15:52,822
Nigga, if you ruin
this party for me,
376
00:15:52,823 --> 00:15:55,659
I'll put my-
Ruin the party? They love me.
377
00:15:55,660 --> 00:15:57,328
These people aren't worried
about us.
378
00:15:57,329 --> 00:16:00,230
They're not worried
about anything. They're rich.
379
00:16:00,231 --> 00:16:01,465
No matter what happens,
380
00:16:01,466 --> 00:16:03,868
these people will
just keep applaudin'.
381
00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:10,742
Ahem. Attention please.
382
00:16:10,743 --> 00:16:14,013
My name is Uncle Ruckus,
no relation.
383
00:16:14,014 --> 00:16:18,518
I want to sing y'all a brand
new song I just wrote called:
384
00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:21,388
"Don't Trust Them New Niggas
Over There. "
385
00:16:21,389 --> 00:16:24,290
Sing along
if you know the words.
386
00:16:29,031 --> 00:16:33,302
? Don't trust them new niggas
Over there?
387
00:16:33,303 --> 00:16:37,506
? Leavin' they nigga essence
In the air?
388
00:16:37,507 --> 00:16:40,477
? Them happy
Nappy-head niggas?
389
00:16:40,478 --> 00:16:42,145
? With their fingers?
390
00:16:42,146 --> 00:16:43,546
? On the triggers?
391
00:16:43,547 --> 00:16:46,751
? Don't trust them new niggas
Over there?
392
00:16:48,053 --> 00:16:51,655
Are you sure that vest'll stop
this shotgun?
393
00:16:51,656 --> 00:16:55,027
Man, I'm like the Terminator
in this vest.
394
00:16:56,496 --> 00:16:58,997
? What the hell They doin' here anyway??
395
00:17:00,033 --> 00:17:02,134
What? You don't believe me?
396
00:17:02,135 --> 00:17:03,836
Go ahead!
397
00:17:03,837 --> 00:17:05,105
Pull the trigger.
398
00:17:05,106 --> 00:17:07,840
Now, are you sure that-?
399
00:17:07,841 --> 00:17:09,410
I said pull that trigger now!
400
00:17:09,411 --> 00:17:11,345
You wanna play rough?
401
00:17:11,346 --> 00:17:12,613
Okay.
402
00:17:12,614 --> 00:17:16,952
? Don't trust them big nostrils
Over yonder?
403
00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:21,790
? They'll suck up so much air
It'll make you wonder?
404
00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:23,926
? Don't trust them new niggas?
405
00:17:23,927 --> 00:17:26,963
? With their squatty little
Nigga-figures?
406
00:17:26,964 --> 00:17:30,466
? Don't trust them new niggas?
407
00:17:30,467 --> 00:17:33,137
? Over there?
408
00:17:37,108 --> 00:17:40,546
I think the N-word is okay,
as long as they say it.
409
00:17:43,515 --> 00:17:44,882
See?
410
00:17:44,883 --> 00:17:47,721
Say hello to my little friend.
411
00:17:59,900 --> 00:18:01,202
Fuck y'all lookin' at?
412
00:18:19,890 --> 00:18:22,326
Hey, you think we in trouble?
413
00:18:22,327 --> 00:18:24,461
You shot his grandson
out the window.
414
00:18:24,462 --> 00:18:25,629
What you think?
415
00:18:27,899 --> 00:18:28,966
I don't know.
416
00:18:28,967 --> 00:18:30,234
I didn't want to move here,
417
00:18:30,235 --> 00:18:33,071
but I don't really want Granddad
to lose his house.
418
00:18:33,072 --> 00:18:35,507
He worked his whole life
to get here.
419
00:18:35,508 --> 00:18:39,278
Man, I like that house.
420
00:18:39,279 --> 00:18:42,014
Oh, well, I shot a nigga!
421
00:18:46,354 --> 00:18:48,154
Mr. Wuncler,
422
00:18:48,155 --> 00:18:52,159
I'm... sorry about
the whole, you know,
423
00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:54,329
my grandson shooting
your grandson
424
00:18:54,330 --> 00:18:56,798
out of the window thing.
425
00:18:56,799 --> 00:18:57,866
Are you mad?
426
00:18:57,867 --> 00:18:59,969
In 30 years,
427
00:18:59,970 --> 00:19:04,406
that boy will be the president
of the United States.
428
00:19:04,407 --> 00:19:06,910
And he'll still
be a fucking idiot.
429
00:19:06,911 --> 00:19:08,912
Whew.
430
00:19:08,913 --> 00:19:11,748
Now, are we gonna have
that drink or what?
431
00:19:13,350 --> 00:19:15,753
Glad you were able
to make it, Robert.
432
00:19:15,754 --> 00:19:17,088
To the old school.
433
00:19:17,089 --> 00:19:18,890
To the old school.
434
00:19:18,940 --> 00:19:23,490
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