All language subtitles for Scrubs s09e08 Couples.eng

I didn't know we were
about to get nasty.

Why do you think none
of my horses are watching?

I truly dig how nuts you are.
(laughs)

Oh, hey, can I borrow your laptop

To do those endocrine system
slides for our study group?

What's wrong with yours?
It's super slow right now

'cause I'm downloading
every "golden girls" episode.

(laughs) man, those old chicks
are insane!

All right, there was this one episode...
(lucy) while I was pretending to listen,

I thought about how everyone
at the hospital

Seems to be coupling up.

There was drew and denise.

They were still
in their puppy love stage.

Ugh. Drew, if I wanted
to be with a girl, I could.

Save all the emotional crap
for your diary.

Then their was
our dysfunctional mom and dad.

How you holding up?
Fine. You?

All good. There's no way in hell
you're beating me

At "nds on a coma patient,"
so take your hands off. Quit. I don't quit.

I don't quit more.

(lowers voice) oh, no,
it's his grandson.

What are you doing
to my grandpa?

Nice try.
That's dr etten's kid.

Hey, you, next time try
dialing down the acting a notch.

Less is more.
Go on, get outta here.

Fake grandson?
That is some weak sauce.

Let me show you how the big boys
play. (whistles) todd!

Yah!
No!

(laughs)
(groans)

What the hell, todd?!
Well, I had no choice.

He found a picture
of adult braces todd.

I can't let that get out there.
"rock in a hard place" five?

And the winning streak
continues! Yes, sir!

Thank you for your help,
mr. Sawyer.

As a token
of my appreciation,

I'm gonna come back later
and smother you with a pillow.

Listen up, losers.

I'm tiof repeating
the same procedure to you guys

Over and over.

I want two sugars, one cream,

And only a splash--and I mean
a splash--of hazelnut.

Okay? Now get outta here.

You are
a wonderful teacher.

I'm getting better, right?
Mm-hmm.

Sorrys we's late.
Well, not "we."

We're not a "we."
(chuckles nervously)

I mean, I know, yes, we're both
late, but we're not, like,

Coming from the same place
or anything, right, cole?

I'm gonna go crush a scone.

She told me you two
were sleeping together.

Denise, that was girl talk!

You have broken a sacred bond
between sisters.

Oh, no.

Now I'm not goa get to wear
the traveling pants this week.

Look, I know that you've got

Daddy/food/body/
confidence/horse issues.

But cole? Really?

He's only a booty call.

It's just... I can't stop.

It's like having a scab you know
you're not supposed to pick at,

But you just can't help it
'cause you have to know

What's under
that pus-y filled mess.

Call me crazy, but I think
you kids might just make it.

You think?
(both) no.

That was fun.

Torturing her?
Yeah.

We should do more things like
that, you know, as a couple.

Yeah, this makes sense.

I know I do not see you
in my cart. Well, your cart

So she was just gonna move it
for you.

You can't just touch a man's
work equipment all willy-nilly.

Do you see me trying
to perform a tracheotomy

Just because I did security
for the tv show "er"?

He and eriq la salle
still go to the same church.

You know, the last guy
who mouthed off to me

Has to permanently sit down
when he urinates. Joke's on you.

Bottom line, touch the cart
again and you're going down.

Don't know who she thinks
she is. It's the captain's car.

This could be fun.

Yeah, I'm happy for us.

Now then, students,
our next patient is suffering

From a horrible diase

Known as "being dr. Cox's
bitch-itis."

You may ask yourself, how does
one catch such a disease?

Well, you do so
by losing a bet

Again and again
and again and again.

And again and again.

Until eventually, the disease
renders you helpless

To say only
the following phrase...

Dr. Coxy is hella foxy.

(laughter)

When I py,
I play for keeps.

Bank on it.

Our presentation
is at 7:00 a.M.

Cole's supposed to do
all the slides.

Lucy, where the hell is he?
Why are you asking me?

Maybe he's napping. Maybe he's
training to be a pastry chef.

I don't know
what his dreams are, drew. This is why

I'm sick of cole.
He's always running late.

And I'm tired
of him asking me

To hook him up
with russell crowe. Yeah, and he's always

For coming to this country
on a boat. Trang, your dad owns, like,

Get over it.
What up, nerds?

Cole, did you bring
the slides?

Oh, snap. No, no, look,
I was just about to start,

Then my boy boots called,
and he was all like,

"yo, cole, it's boots!
Let's go to seaworld."

Dudes, I got to swim
with a walrus!

You know what, cole? That's it.
You're out of study group.

What?

Hey, are they actually pissed
about this?

Whoa. (scoffs)

Even though cole had been
kicked out of the study group,

He seemed to be doing okay.
Too much work!

And I might have to study on
the weekend? That ain't right!

Hey.

Ballpark peanuts.
You know something I don't know?

I know a minimum of
9 million things you don't know.

Number 63--art's back.

Who's art?
Who's art?!

This... Is art.

(both imitating crowd roaring)

Hiya! (chuckles)

Art's been slinging peanuts
at the ballpark for 40 years.

He is a concessionary legend.

You should all bow down.

I'm serious. Bow down.

Now get out.

All right, who wants a key
to a golf cart?

It's right out front,
all juiced up, ready to go.

You can travel in style

Like an old couple cruisin'
the sad folks' home.

Hey, how many keys
did you make?

Mm, just a couple.
Oh, nice!

How did they not see us
stealing their cart?

Frank, that cloud
look like a cupcake,

And that one look like
a chili dog.

Man, I hate
being on a diet.

Lookit, that one
looks like a turkey leg.

Oh, a big turkey leg.

And a pie, a lemon pie.
Lemon meringue pie.

I will take a key,
thank you very much.

I would never willingly
give you anything

That was not some sort
of fatal virus.

Whoa. Did you see that?

I'm startin' to get a vibe

That drew doesn't
like me or something.

Oh, no. That's how friends
make jokes.

Nah, trust me.
I'm great at reading people.

Hey, that's why
you gotta ask him

About letting me back in
the study group. Or...

We could let him
come to us.

Abou then we'll beack in
in a position of power. Or...

You know, like,
your move, drew!

Nah, come on, please.
He listens to you.

You're smart and nice,
and you smell like the bea.

Okay, I'll do it.
Yeah, not like the kind of beach with dead fish

And homeless dudes camping
and that weird foamy stuff th--

Yeah, I got it.
Yeah.

Look at you guys...

Chief of medicine.
Chief of surgery.

It must be nice to have risen up
with each other, huh?

To work with someone
that's got your back.

Well, we get awfully busy...
There's not that much of that...

With some of the doctoring around here.
Around here.

I'll tell you what there, art.

Before we do take a look
at that shoulder,

We've been having
just a ton of good clean fun

With one thing in particular.

Dr. Turk,
you have anything to add?

I don't think it's, uh,
particularly appropriate

To discuss this
in front of a patient.

Approprio maximus.

(monitor beeping steadily)

Dr. Coxy is hella foxy.

(laughs)

(laughing)

I so am!

I bought a candle
to set the mood.

Work with me.
It's all they had. (closes door)

Oh, hey, what did drew say about
me rejoining the study group?

He said no.
Really?

Hey, did you remind him
I'm 1/18th american indian?

Are you?
I don't know, but I always tell people that.

Makes the white man
feel guilty.

Damn, this sucks.
I'm dyin' on my own.

Yeah, and I'm sad for you,

But we don't want to let this candle go to waste.
Come on, babe. I'm not in the mood.

(sighs)

(blows)

(blows)

(blows)

A trick candle?
I mean, who finds these funny?

(laughs) do it again.

Do it.

(blows)
yeah!

(laughing)

Once we get the c.T. Back ,

It's gonna show the best way for
me to handle it is surgically.

You would say that,
you slice-happy knife jockey.

Here's actually
what's going to happen.

We're going to heal him
through medication and p.T.

Right, physical therapy--
the miracle of stretching.

It sure beats cuttin' arthur
open like he's a pig at a luau.

Why do you always have to be right?
I don't have to. I just am.

Lets handle this like men.

First one to winston hall
gets to decide how we treat him.

You're on. And... Go.

(laughs) oh, yeah!

Whoo!
Ooh!

(whistling)

There she is.

You stole our cart.

Now come correct
about what you've done.

Don't make me
bring the thunder.

'cause once it's been brought,
it cannot be unbrought.

You think maybe
your cart wasn't stolen?

Maybe it just left on its own.
What in the name of larry holmes are you talking about?

We've seen the way
you treat that cart.

There are patterns of abuse there.
Yeah, I mean, the kicking, the insults.

Skipping maintenance checks.
Don't forget where your bread's buttered, frank.

Clearly, the cart is reaing
to an injustice,

Trying to correct an imbalance in the universe.
Cart-ma.

That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.
Is It?

(hn honks in distance)

What the hell?

You know, the "check engine"
light's been on since may.

Just sayin'.

(laughs)

Whoo!

Heads up, geezers!

(brakes screech)
oh, for god's sake!

(turk) I'm gonna win!
No, no, no, no!

(laughs)

(golf cart approaching)
no! No!

No!
(tires screech)

Ya know, it's almost gotten to the point...
No!

Where I don't enjoy
beating you anymore.

That's not true! I love it.
Right, fellas?

Oh, hey, guys. What's up?

You out here
scopin' the ladies?

I hear rebecca b. Has sex
with multiple partners.

(high-pitched voice) what?

(normal voice)
that's how guys talk, right?

Not at all.

Actually, we were just talking
about how you told cole

That I said he couldn't
get back into study group,

But you never asked me that.

I didn't?

Nope, and since the only thing
I hate more

Than entitled little pukes
who don't pull their own weight

Is when people put words
in my mouth...

Cole, you're back
in study group.

Hells, yeah.
The boys are back. Mnh.

By punishing her,
I punish myself. Such is life.

What the hell, luce?

Sometimes there are no words.

Weuietly do what we can.

And hopefully,

No one comes along and says
what we don't wanna hear.

Whoa. Whose tumor is that?

Art's.

That sucks.

Yeah.

How you holding up, art?

I've been better.

Dr. Cox tells me
there's a surgical option.

I'm interested in that.

Okay.

Okay, um...

Just give me a second
to talk to dr. Cox, all right?

What are you doing?
This surgery is risky

For a patient half arthur's age
and healthier.

Listen to me.
This could buy him some time.

If we don't do it,
he is dead in six months.

It's worth a shot.
It's too risky.

I'm right, you're wrong,
and I'm not doing it.

No, I'm right,
and you are wrong,

And you damn sure are doing it
because I am your boss.

You're pulling rank on me?

I am. Now if you would,
please say it.

No! I'm too pissed off!
Those aren't the rules.

(sighs)
dr. Coxy is hella foxy.

Good effort.
Do well in surgery.

Okay, hopefully all that stuff
with cole and drew

Has just blown over and we can
all get back to normal.

Lucy, lucy, lucy.

If you wanna be in this study
group, you gotta show up on time

'cause you're lettin' us
all down. Right, drew?

Dude, I'm just trying
to learn about mucous.

Can we finally
talk about the fact

That you and cole are sleeping together?
Thank you, t-bone. I would love to talk about that.

No, t-bone! I don't think
study group is the proper place

To be discussing
who slept with who.

Trang slept with me.
Never called me back. Stuff came up.

Crazy idea--how about we just
who study in study group?

Uh, no can do.

I gotta take a walk
to clear my head,

Maybe grab a fruit roll-up.
I don't even know right now.

(lowered voice) drew!

Why would you tell everyone
about me and cole?

There has never been anything
in the entire world

I care less about, except maybe
this moment and "american idol."

Cole told us. He's been
bragging about it for a month. What?!

We are never going to learn
anything about medicine.

(pencil drops to floor)

(panting) you okay?
I just got your message. I'm fine.

You said you were attacked.

Oh, yeah. That was a lie.
Look at these two.

(speaks indistinctly)
they're totally falling apart, turning on each other.

Okay, I think it's time
to wrap this operation up.

I need you to go find out
who has the cart.

(panting)
you said you were stabbed.

How come you never get my jokes?
Now go. Chop-chop.

(chuckles)

You said you were stabbed.

(monitor emitting continuous tone)
we're losin' him.

Art, hang in there, buddy.

Start the neo-synephrine drip.
Somebody call cardiology!

Don't say anything.

Please.

I don't think I have to.
You'll beat yourself up.

(brakes screech)

Damn, girl! You can't just jump
in front of golf carts.

That's how gardeners die.
Why are you such an ass?

You think it's so cool

Just to brag to everybody
about how you slept with me?

Do you know how embarrassing that is?
You know what's embarrassing?

That you're ashamed
to be with me. Maybe I am.

Cole, you call my butt
nicknames in public.

What are you talking about?
"boomtown," "lenny" and "the fart zone"?

Plus, you abbreviate
everything.

News flash--
pb&j is already abbreviated.

You don't nice to call it
"peebers and jazz."

Oh, like you're so great?

Okay, you're wishy-washy,
you're obsessed with horses,

And there's
that weird role-play

Where you make me pretend I'm black.
Is this coming from cole or deshaun?

Both. Look, I know
what people think of me,

And I know I act
like an ass sometimes.

But I thought
you saw through that.

Okay? And I didn't brag about
sleeping with you to seem cool.

I did it because I'm proud
that a girl like you

Would wanna be
with someone like me.

Boom, outta here.

(brakes screech)
yeah, you're done.

Haven't found
your cart yet, huh?

Nope.
The school assigned us scooters.

I don't have the core muscles
to ride that bitch.

Well, maybe if you just
apologize to the cart,

It'll come back.

I'm not apologizing
to no cart.

What would it hurt,
captain?

(whispers)
the truth is out there.

Fine, frank. I'll apologize.

I'm sorry, cart.

I'm sorry I scuff you up.

I'm sorry
I take you for granted.

But if you come back,
I promise I'll treat you better.

Happy?

Oh, hallelujah!

I'm gonna take these.

I feel a lot closer to you.
Me, too,

But I need to keep this messing
with people vibe going, so...

Hey, annoying girl.

My fault. Too general.
Blondie.

Girl blondie.
Why do you look so sad?

It's this thing
with me and cole.

Don't tell me. Tell drew.
He's a great listener.

Why?
If you saw your face, you'd understand.

(scoffs)
have fun.

Drew, I'm really sorry
I lied about the study group.

It's just this thing with cole
is messing with my head.

I know he's a tool, but then
how come I feel so horrible?

Because you're
a needy, sad, crazy person

Who constantly makes
bad decisions?

Just my first thought. I'm still working out the rest.
Lucy, can I ask you a few questions

About your douchey boyfriend?

Um, does he ever
say sweet stuff to you?

(chuckles)

Man, I never noticed what
a beautiful smile you have.

Yeah, kinda.
And when you guys hang out, is it fun?

Does he make you laugh?

(laughing)

Maybe.

Think about cole right now.
How does he make you feel?

You're smiling.

Oh, crap.

I like him.

Yes, you do. You like him.

You like him, you crazy white girl.
But it's cole.

And as sad
as that may be for you,

This hospital is so brutal that
if you actually find someone

That can help you
get through it, you're lucky.

Because here,

Everyone needs someone
to watch their back.

Right, dr, turk?

Absolutely.

(laughs) I don't like cole.
Yes, you do.

Damn it!
I feel for you.

(sighs deeply)

Came to get your licks in, huh?
I get it.

I damn sure deserve it.
You may... Fire at will.

Actually,
I came to say thank you.

You showed a lot of stones int.
Making that hard call for art.

It was the right choice.
I was just scared to take it.

It cost him his life.

We stole six months from that guy.
You and I both know

That he would've spent most
of that time in this hospital,

Just waiting to die.

You pushed me
to give him a chance.

You had my back on this one,
and I want you to know

That you can always
count on me to have yours. I appreciate you saying that.

Now I know
exactly what it feels like

To be in a morgan freeman movie.
(sighs)

Hey. Come here.

To art.

(clink)

(indistinct conversations)

Cole, can I talk to you?

Out in public like this?

Don't be crazy.
There's people around.

Excuse me for a second,
everybody.

I just have something
I wanna say.

This is cole aaronson,

And, yes,
he's a bit of a jerk,

And, yes, he's probably
screwed over every one of you,

And, yes,
he loves dane cook.

But none of that
matters to me

Because I know it just
started out as a hookup,

I've realized that
I actually really like him.

And so if it's cool
with him,

I'd like to introduce you all
to my boyfriend.

Nice speech. Nobody cares.

Some couples just work

No matter how odd a pairing
they seem to be.

The common denominator
is being there for each other.

Technically, I was right
about arthur,

So I'm-a need you
to give me what's mine.

Let me hear it.

All right, but just because
I'm a man of honor. Ahem.

Ladies and gentlemen...

Toot, toot, tootie...

Dr. Turk's a cutie.

(laughter)

Yes, I am.

In the end, you just can't
be afraid to move forward.

You're my number one shorty,
yo.

Yeah, that actually
leads perfectly

Into what I wanted
to talk to you about.

All ears, boo.

See, now that we're
officially a couple,

We're gonna have to start...
Well, changing you.

Okay, boo?
(chuckles) wait, what now?

Man, this is so hard! How am I
supposed to remember all this?

Ile you're my boyfriend,
please refrain from using

The following words
and phrases--crushing "it,"

Ghostriding the whip,
hunting the big dawg,

Redonkulous, wrangle dangle,
shtoops,

The "donk" show, gittin' right,
homeskillet,

Broseph, brosephine
and sexting.

On the serious?
There's another one.

Also, substituting your name

For words that sort of sound
like your name--

Stone cole, cole war,
pi?a cole-lada...

You know what I'm saying.

Girl, I can't give this all up
cole turkey.

Why don't we just
call it a day?

And we'll, uh, start fresh in the morning.
Sizzle.

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