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1
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Previously on no activity...
2
00:00:21,240 --> 00:00:22,140
What?
3
00:00:22,240 --> 00:00:23,580
Get off me!
4
00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:24,380
OH, NO. CHIEF: Janice!
5
00:00:24,480 --> 00:00:25,660
Oh, daddy likes that.
6
00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:26,980
Ooh, yeah, daddy does.
7
00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:28,780
No. I'm daddy.
8
00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:30,380
Then... who am I?
9
00:00:30,480 --> 00:00:31,820
You're daddy's baby girl.
10
00:00:36,680 --> 00:00:37,820
All units stand down.
11
00:00:37,920 --> 00:00:39,820
The raid has been canceled.
12
00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,820
Kyle is a gentleman that is
living with me and my wife.
13
00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:45,820
And, also, he's having sex with her.
14
00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,220
Fucking stinks in here. Oh, yeah.
15
00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:50,940
That's my softball
team's dirty laundry bag.
16
00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:54,140
That softball team is the
epicenter of police corruption.
17
00:00:54,240 --> 00:00:55,140
And we need you to find out
18
00:00:55,240 --> 00:00:56,460
how much he knows,
19
00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:58,420
how deep it goes, and who the leader is.
20
00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:00,180
Shit.
21
00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:03,020
Car 27, maintain position.
22
00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:04,940
Copy that. Remind
me, why are we still here?
23
00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:05,980
I don't know, Cullen.
24
00:01:06,080 --> 00:01:06,940
Take it up with your C.O.
25
00:01:07,040 --> 00:01:08,140
Dispatch out.
26
00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:15,020
Ooh.
27
00:01:15,120 --> 00:01:16,740
Yeah.
28
00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:18,740
Oh.
29
00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:21,860
Oh, yes.
30
00:01:21,960 --> 00:01:23,700
Could you turn the massage
chair off, please?
31
00:01:23,800 --> 00:01:25,500
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't...
32
00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:28,140
I forgot I was at work.
Uh-huh.
33
00:01:28,240 --> 00:01:30,220
Whew. Boy.
34
00:01:30,320 --> 00:01:32,420
Oh, hey. Do you need some,
uh, hand sanitizer?
35
00:01:32,520 --> 00:01:33,660
Uh, no.
36
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:34,860
No? Why would I need that?
37
00:01:34,960 --> 00:01:36,940
Oh, I just thought you might be dirty.
38
00:01:37,040 --> 00:01:38,540
Oh. Fucking rat.
39
00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:39,500
I'm sorry?
40
00:01:39,600 --> 00:01:40,540
Fucking rat out there.
41
00:01:40,640 --> 00:01:41,540
Where? No, it's gone.
42
00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:43,020
It was just there.
43
00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:44,820
For a second, I thought
44
00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:46,660
you were calling me a rat. Oh, really?
45
00:01:46,760 --> 00:01:48,460
That's funny.
46
00:01:48,560 --> 00:01:50,020
Why would I call you a rat?
47
00:01:50,120 --> 00:01:51,540
Is there a reason I
might call you a rat?
48
00:01:51,640 --> 00:01:53,820
I was born the year of the rat.
49
00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:54,620
Were you? Mm-hmm.
50
00:01:54,720 --> 00:01:56,060
Okay.
51
00:01:56,160 --> 00:01:58,260
Hey, how much was this, uh...
52
00:01:58,360 --> 00:02:01,420
Uh, my vibrating amethyst
massage chair cover?
53
00:02:01,520 --> 00:02:03,260
Right. Yeah. That
couldn't have been cheap.
54
00:02:03,360 --> 00:02:05,060
It was cheap. Very cheap. Oh, really?
55
00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:06,740
Yeah. 1,200 bucks.
56
00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:08,740
$1,200? $1,200.
57
00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:10,700
$1,200? Really? Yeah.
58
00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:13,020
Yeah. Seems like a lot to me.
I don't know.
59
00:02:13,120 --> 00:02:15,380
Well, you know, we spend
half of our lives,
60
00:02:15,480 --> 00:02:17,180
me and you, sitting in this car.
61
00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:19,600
Uh-huh. You got to think about the pps.
62
00:02:20,920 --> 00:02:22,300
Price per sit.
63
00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:24,300
Right. Of course. Yeah.
64
00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:25,980
I guess, for me, I'm just...
65
00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:27,900
I'm satisfied with a
standard-issue seat.
66
00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,100
You know, an honest
chair for an honest ass
67
00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:31,580
and an honest night's work.
68
00:02:31,680 --> 00:02:32,980
Ooh.
69
00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:35,940
That's my phone. I
should take this call.
70
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:37,820
No, take it in here. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Take it in here. It's fine.
71
00:02:37,920 --> 00:02:40,540
I don't want to bore you. You're not...
you'd be boring me by going outside.
72
00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:42,380
Oh... I'd fall asleep without you here.
73
00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:44,700
You are so silly!
74
00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:45,980
I am silly, aren't I? Shh!
75
00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:47,300
We're on stakeout. Okay.
76
00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:52,380
Hello?
77
00:02:52,480 --> 00:02:54,480
Yes?
78
00:02:57,520 --> 00:02:59,940
Right. Yes.
79
00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:02,040
I can do...
80
00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:05,160
What do you got, tolbeck?
81
00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:09,820
What do we got here?
82
00:03:09,920 --> 00:03:12,100
A second phone.
83
00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:14,180
Are you fucking kidding?
84
00:03:14,280 --> 00:03:17,180
Okay. Okay, shit.
85
00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:19,180
Shit. Shit.
86
00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:21,660
Shit.
87
00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,280
Okay.
88
00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:32,860
Okay, okay.
89
00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:34,380
I can do that, I can do that.
90
00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:36,220
I'm gonna do that. Okay.
91
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:42,380
You fucking little rat bitch.
92
00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:45,260
You are going down.
93
00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:20,340
Hey, it's me. Did you
get the request I put in
94
00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:22,140
for the surveillance van? Helen: Yeah.
95
00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:24,900
And why do you need it?
Because I do, Helen, okay?
96
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,060
I need it for my investigation.
97
00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:29,460
God, why is everything such a
thing with you? Oh, my god.
98
00:04:29,560 --> 00:04:30,540
Take the fucking van.
99
00:04:32,080 --> 00:04:35,560
Okay, daddy, what are you doing now?
100
00:04:45,560 --> 00:04:47,740
What are you doing?
101
00:04:47,840 --> 00:04:49,740
Ooh, daddy.
102
00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:53,980
Aw.
103
00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:58,240
That, that is great.
104
00:04:59,840 --> 00:05:00,740
Yes.
105
00:05:00,840 --> 00:05:03,340
Fuck yes.
106
00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:06,940
What? Who this?
107
00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:08,740
This is my wife.
108
00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:12,380
Oh, god.
109
00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:14,540
I could call her.
110
00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:16,540
Come on. Whoo-ee.
111
00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:18,060
Like a one-minute phone call.
112
00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:19,980
I'll be in... I'll be in a rush.
113
00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:21,420
Holy cow.
114
00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:23,340
This is stupid. What am I doing?
115
00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:27,620
Hi.
116
00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:28,940
Hey.
117
00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:29,940
Hi.
118
00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:31,420
Uh...
119
00:05:31,520 --> 00:05:33,220
What are you doing?
120
00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:35,020
I'm just doing, like, totally normal...
121
00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:38,580
...cool, cool stuff.
122
00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:41,820
Car 27. No activity.
Where's Janice?
123
00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:43,540
Janice is taking some time off.
124
00:05:43,640 --> 00:05:45,540
I got a new guy starting today.
125
00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:46,820
Copy that.
126
00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:49,340
You must be Fatima.
127
00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:50,940
I've heard a lot about you. Hi,
I'm Mike. I'm the new guy.
128
00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:52,540
The new bloke, if you're British.
129
00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:53,980
Are you British?
130
00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:55,220
No.
131
00:05:55,320 --> 00:05:56,780
Nice to meet you, Mike.
132
00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:58,260
I'm sorry. I can't keep this up anymore.
133
00:05:58,360 --> 00:05:59,580
Keep what up?
134
00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:00,820
I'm pranking you.
135
00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:02,140
My name's not Mike.
136
00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:04,420
Never has been. Never will be.
137
00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:07,940
My name is... drumroll, please...
138
00:06:08,040 --> 00:06:10,040
No.
139
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,060
My name is Zach.
140
00:06:14,840 --> 00:06:16,500
I don't get the joke.
141
00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:19,100
You're probably sensing
that I'm a scientologist.
142
00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:21,340
Correct. Don't worry.
143
00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:23,660
Don't sweat it. I'm one of
the chill scientologists.
144
00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:26,000
Probably the chillest
scientologist you'll ever meet.
145
00:06:27,360 --> 00:06:28,700
I d... i...
146
00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:30,540
It's okay. I'm cool.
147
00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:32,620
I'm chill. I'm hip.
148
00:06:32,720 --> 00:06:34,100
I got hbo.
149
00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:36,100
I've seen going clear.
150
00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,660
Wow. Okay. That's progressive.
151
00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:40,460
I hate it. I hate that movie.
152
00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:42,660
The cinematography is so bad.
153
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:46,140
Yeah, that's-that's what got
me about that movie, too.
154
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:48,620
It's like, "go to film school.
Learn from the masters."
155
00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,820
Well... Is
that fly bothering you?
156
00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:52,460
'Cause I'll kill that fly.
157
00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:53,500
Fly is dead.
158
00:06:53,600 --> 00:06:54,740
It's gone.
159
00:06:54,840 --> 00:06:56,540
No one will ever see it again.
160
00:06:56,640 --> 00:06:58,900
It could wind up in the
pine barrens of New Jersey.
161
00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,620
You throw a body in a
river the right way,
162
00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:02,940
it floats into the sea.
163
00:07:03,040 --> 00:07:05,820
I'll keep you posted.
164
00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:08,420
Do I have your permission
to use the restroom?
165
00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:09,640
You don't have to ask
me to use the bathroom.
166
00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:11,220
Actually...
167
00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:12,700
No, I don't need to go anymore.
168
00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:14,420
My body reabsorbed it.
169
00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:16,420
Must've needed those
nutrients after all.
170
00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:18,700
Body's crazy, how it can do that.
171
00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:22,500
Couldn't just get a normal white guy?
172
00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:35,500
Hey. Guess what I did the other day.
173
00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:36,900
A personality test.
174
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:39,780
Oh! I wanted to guess what you did.
175
00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:42,100
Maybe we could do it together.
It's a Myers-Briggs test.
176
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,580
And it's really fun. And you
find out all about yourself
177
00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:47,100
and your personality and you
find out who else you're like,
178
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:49,020
you know, including
fictional characters.
179
00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:51,580
And I'm an exact match for Sansa stark.
180
00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:53,220
Ooh! I know.
181
00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,140
Who is that?
182
00:07:55,240 --> 00:07:57,020
From game of thrones.
183
00:07:57,120 --> 00:07:59,620
Fun! Yeah, I know. I know.
184
00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:01,620
I've never heard of that before.
185
00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:02,520
You never heard of game of thrones?
186
00:08:02,600 --> 00:08:03,780
No.
187
00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:05,220
Oh, is it the show about castle?
188
00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:07,620
No, that's castle.
189
00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:10,540
Castle. Castle. Anyway,
why don't we do this?
190
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:12,740
It's really fun, and I think
you'd get a lot out of it.
191
00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:16,100
So, question one, um, you find
a bag of money in the street.
192
00:08:16,200 --> 00:08:18,300
Return it?
193
00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:21,420
Keep some of it but
return most of it?
194
00:08:21,520 --> 00:08:24,900
Keep it all and silence
anybody who's ever seen it?
195
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:26,780
Oh, this is wasted on me.
196
00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:28,300
Why's that? 'Cause I don't have one.
197
00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:29,580
One what?
198
00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:31,220
A personality.
199
00:08:31,320 --> 00:08:33,180
What are you talking...?
Everybody has a personality.
200
00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:35,380
No, you're wrong. Two
percent of the population
201
00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:37,180
does not have a personality.
202
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:39,260
I read an article on it.
I'll send it to you.
203
00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:41,300
No, tolbeck, everybody
has a personality.
204
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,300
No, I'm telling you, it's not like that.
205
00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:45,300
It's like, you know how
some people can't tell
206
00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:47,300
the difference between red and green?
207
00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:48,620
I mean, there's a lot of people like me.
208
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:50,100
You know? Usher.
209
00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:52,900
Jennifer Lawrence. Justin Timberlake.
210
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:54,500
You wonder why you
haven't seen all of us
211
00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:55,900
at a dinner party together?
212
00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:57,060
'Cause you're not famous?
213
00:08:57,160 --> 00:08:59,420
No. Because it would be boring.
214
00:08:59,520 --> 00:09:01,620
"Hello, Justin Timberlake."
215
00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:03,460
"Oh, hi, officer tolbeck.
216
00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:05,180
What are you doing?"
217
00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:06,460
"Oh, nothing.
218
00:09:06,560 --> 00:09:07,820
"Hey, look who's over there.
219
00:09:07,920 --> 00:09:09,420
It's Jennifer Lawrence."
220
00:09:09,520 --> 00:09:11,060
"Hi, officer tolbeck.
221
00:09:11,160 --> 00:09:12,420
"It's me, Jennifer Lawrence.
222
00:09:12,520 --> 00:09:14,580
What do you guys want to talk about?"
223
00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:16,940
So, are you at a dinner party? Yes.
224
00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:19,540
Why do you say "over there" when you
talked about Jennifer Lawrence?
225
00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:21,900
As if she just walked through the door.
Oh, I see.
226
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:26,380
Oprah. I'm telling you, she and I
have something very much in common,
227
00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:29,700
which is we don't have that
part of the cortex in the brain
228
00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:32,100
that creates personality. That
actually does feel right.
229
00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,060
Mm-hmm. Now that you mention it.
230
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,160
You know what? I have to
send you that article.
231
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:36,340
Mm-hmm. I mean...
232
00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:37,780
I have to send you that...
233
00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:40,300
Okay.
234
00:09:40,400 --> 00:09:41,860
Send me the article. I'll read it.
235
00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:44,060
Oops.
236
00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:45,740
Oh, I got to take this. Take it in here.
237
00:09:45,840 --> 00:09:47,500
Tolbeck, take it in here. It's fine.
238
00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:49,060
What's with all the secret calls?
239
00:09:49,160 --> 00:09:50,460
I got to go. You mind?
240
00:09:50,560 --> 00:09:53,780
You know, secrets metastasize.
241
00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:55,940
You know what I hate?
When people ask you to use
242
00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:57,860
a coaster on, like, some bullshit table
243
00:09:57,960 --> 00:09:59,540
that's not even that nice.
244
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:01,740
Yeah, I know. Exactly. It's,
like, why are you protecting
245
00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:03,740
random surfaces, you
fucking garbage person?
246
00:10:03,840 --> 00:10:04,900
You're worthless.
247
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:07,340
I love boobs.
248
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:08,300
Oh, you're fun.
249
00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:09,300
You're very fun.
250
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:12,060
I like talking to you.
251
00:10:12,160 --> 00:10:14,160
♪ Metoo.
252
00:10:14,960 --> 00:10:16,660
I think I had a dream
about you last night.
253
00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:17,940
♪ Timesup. Share that dream.
254
00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:19,780
You were drowning in the ocean,
255
00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:22,180
and I was trying to save
you from inside the kayak
256
00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:24,140
with these big, giant, like, arms,
257
00:10:24,240 --> 00:10:27,100
but the arms were kind
of like wooden oars.
258
00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:28,980
Does that make sense?
259
00:10:29,080 --> 00:10:31,740
I dreamt that we shaved
your beard, and underneath,
260
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:35,100
there was nothing but open
sores all over your face,
261
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:36,500
and then I pulled down your pants,
262
00:10:36,600 --> 00:10:37,900
and where your dick usually is,
263
00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:39,780
there was just a giant, laughing clown.
264
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:41,100
Well... I'll be honest,
265
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:42,660
I haven't shaved in a long time,
266
00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:43,780
so who knows what's in there.
267
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:45,940
You know? Could be...
268
00:10:46,040 --> 00:10:48,780
A bunch of live sores, I guess.
269
00:10:48,880 --> 00:10:50,580
But who cares? Right?
270
00:10:50,680 --> 00:10:52,700
We're all gonna be dead anyway.
271
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:54,900
You know, the sun is gonna
completely engulf the earth
272
00:10:55,000 --> 00:10:56,460
and burn everything up, right?
273
00:10:56,560 --> 00:10:59,340
Any Dave Matthews Band song
that you love is gone.
274
00:10:59,440 --> 00:11:01,500
God, I love
how stupid you are.
275
00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:03,860
Everything will be gone.
I mean, the last person
276
00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,140
who knows Shakespeare will be dead.
277
00:11:06,240 --> 00:11:08,260
I hate Shakespeare. Why are
we still doing his plays?
278
00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:09,940
You know what we should be doing?
279
00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:11,500
The plays of Stephen king.
280
00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:13,300
He is easily
281
00:11:13,400 --> 00:11:14,940
the Shakespeare of our time,
282
00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:16,940
if not better than
Shakespeare, actually.
283
00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:20,260
This was... this was fun.
284
00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:22,220
It was fun. I'm glad you think so, too.
285
00:11:22,320 --> 00:11:24,220
Daddy's got to go to work now.
286
00:11:24,320 --> 00:11:25,340
You know?
287
00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:27,140
He can't afford to be late.
288
00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:28,860
Can't afford to lose
that health insurance.
289
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:31,780
Daddy's diabetes has been
flaring up again, you know.
290
00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:35,660
Well, I... I guess I didn't
realize daddy had diabetes.
291
00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:37,780
That's got to be hard.
292
00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:39,780
They keep cutting off
pieces of daddy's foot.
293
00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:41,620
Soon he's only gonna
have wheels for feet.
294
00:11:41,720 --> 00:11:43,460
But he'll still be able to zoom around
295
00:11:43,560 --> 00:11:44,940
with his little baby girl.
296
00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:46,540
God, you make me proud.
297
00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:48,180
Okay, I have to go now.
298
00:11:48,280 --> 00:11:49,220
Uh... oh.
299
00:11:49,320 --> 00:11:51,320
Bye.
300
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:54,780
Okay.
301
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,660
All right, that went good.
302
00:11:56,760 --> 00:11:58,180
Hey, Steve.
303
00:11:58,280 --> 00:12:01,580
You ever dated a straight-up freak?
304
00:12:01,680 --> 00:12:03,620
Mm-hmm. Yeah! I bet you did.
305
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,720
You're a legend.
306
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:09,660
Car 42, maintain position.
307
00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:11,060
Over and out.
308
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:12,660
I am nailing this job.
309
00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,860
This job is easy.
310
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:17,340
Fatima, I thought of an
icebreaker question.
311
00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:18,620
Cool.
312
00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:20,720
Fatima, icebreaker question.
313
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:25,040
How do you feel about your life?
314
00:12:26,360 --> 00:12:28,260
Um...
315
00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:30,500
You don't love your life?
316
00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:32,420
Tell me why. Tell me everything
that's wrong with it.
317
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:33,620
Get it out.
318
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:36,460
Um, well...
319
00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:38,300
I have these upstairs neighbors,
320
00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:41,460
these college kids, that blast
321
00:12:41,560 --> 00:12:43,740
the worst music all day and night.
322
00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:46,420
Yeah. Yeah. And you said
they live above you?
323
00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:48,520
Yeah. Got it.
324
00:12:50,920 --> 00:12:53,620
Wha... are you gonna...
325
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:56,700
I mean, are you gonna do
something with this information?
326
00:12:56,800 --> 00:12:58,960
What? No.
327
00:13:00,560 --> 00:13:02,740
Why are you smiling like that?
328
00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:04,840
Am I? I'll stop.
329
00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:08,020
I don't know... Please
don't do anything.
330
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:10,500
I don't know if you are, but just forget
331
00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:12,020
I said anything.
332
00:13:12,120 --> 00:13:13,940
I'm just making conversation.
333
00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:15,900
Okay. We're good.
334
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:17,700
Yeah. Okay.
335
00:13:17,800 --> 00:13:19,800
Great. I'm gonna take
my lunch break now.
336
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:22,420
Okay. Well, now?
337
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:24,140
It's not for a few hours.
338
00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:26,540
That's what they would love us to think.
339
00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:28,020
I was very rude.
340
00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:29,540
Do you have any questions for me?
341
00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:31,780
I am an open book. Yeah, okay.
342
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:33,820
Why did you get into scientology?
343
00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:36,980
Don't... Ever ask me that again.
344
00:13:37,080 --> 00:13:39,780
You cannot ask that. I
cannot answer that.
345
00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:42,340
You cannot ask that.
No one can ask that.
346
00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:44,540
Never, ever ask me that again
347
00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,220
in your life.
348
00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:47,940
I'm kidding. But I can't answer that.
349
00:13:48,040 --> 00:13:49,340
Any other questions?
350
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:50,220
Nope.
351
00:13:50,320 --> 00:13:52,500
Lunchtime it is.
352
00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:54,500
Cool.
353
00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:56,900
Well, you're never gonna
get there at that pace.
354
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,540
Yeah. I'll pick up the pace,
if that's what you want.
355
00:13:59,640 --> 00:14:01,680
Don't come back!
356
00:14:03,280 --> 00:14:04,620
Okay.
357
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:06,720
Yeah. Yeah.
358
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:19,960
Don't open that!
359
00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:22,900
What the fuck?
360
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,900
Silk boxers?
361
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:26,700
Oh, my god, what...
362
00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:28,700
$86 a pair?!
363
00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:30,460
Yeah. How many are here?
364
00:14:30,560 --> 00:14:33,020
Seven. Seven pairs. They're
days-of-the-week boxers.
365
00:14:33,120 --> 00:14:34,820
It was a gift for you.
366
00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:36,580
Really. I wanted to get this for you,
367
00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:38,980
because I was hoping that
it would ease the blow.
368
00:14:39,080 --> 00:14:40,860
"Ease the blow"?
369
00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,300
I don't want your dirty,
filthy boxers on my junk.
370
00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:45,020
What is going on with you?
371
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:46,620
The French cuffs. The new shoes.
372
00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:48,260
The suit. The cigars. The hair dryer.
373
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,180
The secret phone calls.
374
00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:52,300
Okay, look, I can explain
all of that, okay?
375
00:14:52,400 --> 00:14:55,020
Oh, yeah, okay, well, I'm all ears.
376
00:14:55,120 --> 00:14:57,980
Don't look at me, okay? Can you just
look out the window, look away? Okay.
377
00:14:58,080 --> 00:14:59,860
Yeah. Let's do that.
378
00:14:59,960 --> 00:15:03,420
This is not easy to tell you, but...
379
00:15:03,520 --> 00:15:06,700
You remember three months
ago, after the raid?
380
00:15:06,800 --> 00:15:09,300
You remember the raid, right?
Yeah, I remember the raid.
381
00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:12,060
Well, after I got home that evening,
382
00:15:12,160 --> 00:15:15,260
Lisa asked me for a divorce.
383
00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:17,540
The phone calls are to
my divorce attorney.
384
00:15:17,640 --> 00:15:20,260
Great. And?
385
00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:22,700
That's it. That's it?
386
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:25,180
No, that's not it. That is not it.
387
00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,180
Because the "it" is that you're dirty!
388
00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:28,860
You're part of haldeman's dirty ring.
389
00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:30,860
You're a dirty little piggy.
I know that.
390
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:33,500
And you're the worst kind of dirty...
you're the kind of dirty
391
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:34,940
that doesn't include his partner.
392
00:15:35,040 --> 00:15:37,140
What are you talking about? Oh, come on!
393
00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:41,100
Leon told me everything. I know the
softball team is dirty. I know it all.
394
00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,380
The team is dirty? Oh,
don't play dumb, tolbeck.
395
00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:45,340
I know everything. It's obvious.
You're busted.
396
00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:47,580
I'm busting you. This is me busting you.
397
00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:49,380
And what about your, uh...
398
00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:51,580
Oh, what about your second phone?
399
00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:55,100
Yeah, that's right. I found that.
400
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:57,900
Okay, look, I'm not proud of this, okay?
401
00:15:58,000 --> 00:16:00,340
Mm-hmm. Do you remember Kyle?
402
00:16:00,440 --> 00:16:01,980
Kyle?
403
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:03,660
Your wife's lover, Kyle?
404
00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:05,140
Yes.
405
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:07,300
Well, we're all on the
family plan together,
406
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:08,860
and I bought the extra phone,
407
00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:10,940
because I wanted to run down our data,
408
00:16:11,040 --> 00:16:13,220
especially Kyle's data.
409
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:15,020
You bought another phone... Mm-hmm.
410
00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:17,340
So Kyle has less data? Yeah.
411
00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:19,820
I mean, I know we all suffer, but...
412
00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:23,820
You know, he's the only gamer,
so he suffers a little bit more.
413
00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:26,060
But that doesn't explain why
you're throwing your money around
414
00:16:26,160 --> 00:16:27,620
like you're, like you're staying
415
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:29,460
in Richard gere's hotel
room for the week.
416
00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:32,380
Look, so that Lisa can't spend it, okay?
417
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:34,340
When her attorney gets done with me,
418
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:36,060
she gets half of everything.
419
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:39,000
And so I figure, half
of nothing is nothing.
420
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:44,460
So you believed Leon?
421
00:16:44,560 --> 00:16:46,580
You thought that I was dirty?
422
00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:49,140
Well, n-no. No, not really. I mean...
423
00:16:49,240 --> 00:16:52,460
Wow... No...
424
00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:54,540
Don't look like that.
425
00:16:54,640 --> 00:16:55,980
It was... I'm...
426
00:16:56,080 --> 00:16:58,380
Hey, hey, I was trying not to.
427
00:16:58,480 --> 00:17:00,020
Wow. And he's really... Please, tolbeck,
428
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:02,220
don't shake your head like that.
429
00:17:02,320 --> 00:17:04,940
He's really scary, and it
was, it was so hot in there.
430
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:06,380
I'm so sorry.
431
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:07,980
Of course you're not dirty.
432
00:17:08,080 --> 00:17:09,660
I'm an idiot. Please?
433
00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:11,580
Please? I'm sorry.
434
00:17:11,680 --> 00:17:13,860
Tolbeck, don't... Please
look at me again.
435
00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:15,940
Please? The way you used to? No.
436
00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:18,460
I wish I could
kiss the living shit
437
00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:20,020
out of your face right now.
438
00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:21,540
Oh. Wow. Really? Yeah.
439
00:17:21,640 --> 00:17:23,220
I wish I could...
440
00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:25,420
Kiss you, too.
441
00:17:25,520 --> 00:17:27,220
How dirty?
442
00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:28,540
I want you to talk
443
00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:29,740
so fucking dirty to me,
444
00:17:29,840 --> 00:17:30,940
you give me an ear infection.
445
00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:34,460
Sorry, I didn't think it
was gonna get this dirty.
446
00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:36,340
It's fine.
447
00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:38,140
You want to know what I'm wearing? Yeah.
448
00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:39,940
Tight blue jeans and a black shirt.
What are you wearing?
449
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:41,300
I'm wearing, like, you know,
450
00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:43,460
you know, dark jeans and a...
and a black shirt
451
00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:45,740
and, like, a... like, a
collared shirt over it.
452
00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:47,220
It-it's a pretty good look.
453
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,820
I want to unzip those jeans,
454
00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:51,740
and I want to soap up
that big-ass penis.
455
00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:54,940
Oh, okay. Well, you know,
just be careful, I guess.
456
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:57,820
I will be, but you know
who won't be? Who?
457
00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:00,420
Daddy. Oh, boy.
458
00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:02,340
Hey, you think daddy should
get a little undressed?
459
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:06,300
Uh... yeah, yeah, sure.
460
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:09,000
Well, now daddy's
unbuttoning her top button.
461
00:18:11,320 --> 00:18:13,300
Your shirt has buttons?
462
00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:15,220
Yeah. Are you sure?
463
00:18:15,320 --> 00:18:16,540
Yes, I'm sure.
464
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:17,980
And now the second button.
465
00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,700
And now all of the buttons.
466
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,020
Uh-oh. She's not doing any of this.
467
00:18:23,120 --> 00:18:24,820
Yes, uh-oh.
468
00:18:24,920 --> 00:18:26,220
Now daddy's shirt is off.
469
00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:28,880
- What about you? You holding it?
- Oh.
470
00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:33,420
Y-yeah, yeah. No, it's-it's out.
471
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:35,980
I'm-I'm holding it. It's-it's
flopping all over the place.
472
00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:37,620
Don't worry about it. I-I'm just...
I'm not doing anything.
473
00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:39,620
Uh-oh.
474
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:41,300
Now your big, strong, stoic father
475
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,220
is cupping her ass with both hands.
476
00:18:43,320 --> 00:18:44,740
What does my baby girl think of that?
477
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:45,780
Wait a minute, what?
478
00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:47,540
What?
479
00:18:47,640 --> 00:18:49,220
Wait, are you really doing this?
480
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:50,980
Why are you fucking interrogating me?
481
00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:52,780
It just doesn't sound like
you're actually doing
482
00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:54,420
any of the stuff you're
saying you're doing.
483
00:18:54,520 --> 00:18:56,580
I mean, I don't fucking know, Marco.
484
00:18:56,680 --> 00:18:58,340
I mean, like, I'm at work.
485
00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:00,620
You know, my fingers are
touching dirty-ass money.
486
00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:03,300
I don't want to put those
fingers inside me.
487
00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:04,780
Well, no, you shouldn't.
488
00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:06,700
Wait, was there any question
489
00:19:06,800 --> 00:19:09,020
that you were gonna put money
inside of you during this?
490
00:19:09,120 --> 00:19:11,420
- All money has traces of urine on
IT, SO, YOU KNOW... - Oh, no.
491
00:19:11,520 --> 00:19:13,380
It's so much worse than that.
You know, they've tested
492
00:19:13,480 --> 00:19:15,100
every single piece of currency
493
00:19:15,200 --> 00:19:16,660
that's come through the treasury,
494
00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:19,860
and almost all of it has
human fecal matter on it?
495
00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:21,980
You told me that.
496
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,380
It's silly. We could have
just spent this time talking.
497
00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:26,860
I know, but... I just wanted
498
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:29,300
to, like, keep that other
stuff alive, you know?
499
00:19:29,400 --> 00:19:31,500
Yeah, but if I'm being honest...
500
00:19:31,600 --> 00:19:33,900
You know, this is the kind
of stuff that I really like.
501
00:19:34,000 --> 00:19:35,580
What, talking like a little bitch?
502
00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:37,780
Connecting, talking, being
honest with each other.
503
00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:40,260
Okay. Yeah, me, too.
504
00:19:40,360 --> 00:19:42,420
I mean, like, yeah, I-i kind of loved
505
00:19:42,520 --> 00:19:44,380
that you called me on my shit.
506
00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:47,020
It-it was hot. So sue me.
507
00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:49,220
Oh, yeah? Well, you're really hot.
508
00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:51,100
And full of shit.
509
00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:53,220
Oh, fuck. Now I'm
touching my nipple. Shit.
510
00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:56,180
Wait. Really?
511
00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:59,420
Whoa. Uh...
512
00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:02,100
Uh...
513
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:04,980
Okay, okay, okay. Give me a second.
514
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:07,460
Hey, hey. Get the fuck out of here.
515
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:09,860
Get out of here. Give
me, like, five minutes.
516
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,960
Give me, like, seven minutes.
517
00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:18,620
Come on, man. Please?
518
00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:20,860
Tolbeck. Hey, buddy? You're my buddy.
519
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:21,980
You're getting a divorce?
520
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:23,700
That's terrible. What happened?
521
00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:25,820
I'm all ears. I'm-I'm here for you.
522
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:29,780
Lisa and Kyle wanted to
close up the open marriage.
523
00:20:29,880 --> 00:20:31,220
Oh, buddy, I'm sorry. Okay?
524
00:20:31,320 --> 00:20:32,820
They really want to be together,
525
00:20:32,920 --> 00:20:34,820
and I don't want to
get in their way. No.
526
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:36,580
I should be furious, right? Right.
527
00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:38,060
But I'm not. No.
528
00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:40,260
I'm just happy for 'em, you know? Yeah.
529
00:20:40,360 --> 00:20:43,500
You should see 'em together.
They're-they're really cute. Are they?
530
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,620
Yeah.
531
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:47,700
I'm... buddy, I'm just sorry
532
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:50,500
you-you didn't think you could
talk to me about this before.
533
00:20:50,600 --> 00:20:52,060
Honestly, I di...
534
00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:53,860
I didn't want you to blame yourself.
535
00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:56,220
Why would I blame myself?
536
00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:58,900
I know how you look up to me and Lisa
537
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:00,580
when it comes to
marriage and everything.
538
00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:02,020
Are you drunk?
539
00:21:02,120 --> 00:21:03,620
You put us on a pedestal,
540
00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:04,980
and I just didn't want you to think
541
00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:07,300
that any of this was your fault.
542
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:10,100
'Cause it's not. I know it's not.
543
00:21:10,200 --> 00:21:13,580
Cullen, it's not your fault.
544
00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:15,660
The more you say it's not my fault,
545
00:21:15,760 --> 00:21:18,500
I feel like maybe you think
it is a little bit my fault.
546
00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:21,300
It is your fault.
547
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:23,340
Well, what's with all the
"it's not your fault"?
548
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:24,740
I just don't want you to
think it's your fault.
549
00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:26,140
How is it my fault?
550
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:28,500
Because you put us up on a pedestal,
551
00:21:28,600 --> 00:21:31,980
and I can't live under that pressure
552
00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:33,740
of being perfect all the time.
553
00:21:33,840 --> 00:21:35,300
Uh-huh. And so,
554
00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:37,740
because of the pressure you put on me,
555
00:21:37,840 --> 00:21:40,060
it caused our marriage to fall apart.
556
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:41,740
I see.
557
00:21:41,840 --> 00:21:45,300
But don't let that be on your head.
558
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:46,300
Okay? Okay.
559
00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:47,540
It's not your fault.
560
00:21:47,640 --> 00:21:49,860
Thanks.
561
00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:52,260
And I apologize for the part I played
562
00:21:52,360 --> 00:21:53,660
in the breakdown of your marriage.
563
00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:55,260
Finally.
564
00:21:55,360 --> 00:21:56,500
Huh? Hmm?
565
00:21:56,600 --> 00:21:57,700
What?
566
00:21:57,800 --> 00:21:59,800
I was just... saw a rat.
567
00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:06,980
Yeah, um, thank you for letting me know.
568
00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:09,780
Yeah.
569
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:11,660
I am so sorry.
570
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:13,420
I know I'm a few minutes late.
571
00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:15,540
I did not intend to be one
second longer than an hour,
572
00:22:15,640 --> 00:22:18,540
but I wound up behind this
motorcycle that spun out.
573
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:20,540
Waited for the paramedics to come,
574
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:22,660
and now it has caused me to be...
575
00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:25,180
I'm, like, three minutes late. And
I know that's not okay. Yeah.
576
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:27,420
I understand that's not okay. Um, Zach.
577
00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:30,260
Uh, that was my landlord on the phone.
578
00:22:30,360 --> 00:22:34,340
He just told me that, uh, my
frat cock neighbors upstairs
579
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:36,940
just decided to move out.
580
00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:39,140
Wow. It's a real wowie.
581
00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:40,740
Uh-huh.
582
00:22:40,840 --> 00:22:42,580
It's because of a death threat?
583
00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:46,380
A very graphic death threat
is what he said, actually.
584
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,860
It was placed under a
tub of animal blood?
585
00:22:48,960 --> 00:22:50,860
Yeah. Wow.
586
00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:53,180
Just ever so subtly.
587
00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:55,280
Would you know anything about that?
588
00:22:56,360 --> 00:22:58,540
No.
589
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:00,220
Not at all.
590
00:23:00,320 --> 00:23:04,060
It sounds like a real
crazy person did it.
591
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:05,460
Sounds like whoever
did that probably had
592
00:23:05,560 --> 00:23:08,140
a real righteous cause that
they believed in, though.
593
00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:09,460
Probably they were inspired to do it
594
00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:10,940
by someone who they find
595
00:23:11,040 --> 00:23:12,860
really inspiring.
596
00:23:12,960 --> 00:23:15,420
Did the landlord call you personally?
597
00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:16,460
Yeah.
598
00:23:18,360 --> 00:23:21,300
He was told not to do
that, I would imagine.
599
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,300
And now he will pay, I am certain.
600
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:25,820
No. No.
601
00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:28,340
You can't terrorize people on my behalf.
602
00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:30,140
That's insane.
603
00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:33,100
Okay, fine. Moving forward,
604
00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:35,620
I promise I will not terrorize
anyone on your behalf,
605
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:37,460
unless, of course, I sense
that that is what you want
606
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:39,460
despite what you say. No.
607
00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:42,620
I'm-I'm saying please do not do that.
608
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:47,020
I cannot believe you would
do those things for me.
609
00:23:47,120 --> 00:23:49,620
Because in the short time
that we've known each other,
610
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:51,340
I've gotten a sense of
your morals and values,
611
00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:53,020
and I believe that
they're really on point,
612
00:23:53,120 --> 00:23:54,900
and I want to support them,
and I want to support you.
613
00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:57,300
Oh.
614
00:23:57,400 --> 00:24:00,020
You really would do
anything for me, huh?
615
00:24:00,120 --> 00:24:02,120
Anything short of murder.
616
00:24:04,920 --> 00:24:06,860
Oh, boy, it feels
so good not to lie to you
617
00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:09,460
- about my divorce anymore.- Oh, my god, yes.
618
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:11,940
I got to tell you, I was
really nervous, man. Really?
619
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:14,420
I had this whole elaborate plan
on how to break it to you. Oh.
620
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,620
So, I figured we would
go out for ice cream.
621
00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:19,140
You know? Yeah. What else?
622
00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:20,740
That's it.
623
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,100
Oh, just ice cream? 'Cause I
thought that'd be a better way
624
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:25,540
to break the news to you.
Man, I'm relieved. I was...
625
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:27,020
I was certain I was gonna
have to turn you in.
626
00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:28,300
No! I know.
627
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:29,980
Believe that shit?
628
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:32,740
That's crazy. I know, man. I know.
629
00:24:32,840 --> 00:24:35,500
I feel free, man. I
feel lighter, you know?
630
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:37,300
I feel like I could fly.
631
00:24:37,400 --> 00:24:39,340
You think Oprah feels
like she wants to fly?
632
00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:42,700
I think I could fly! Fly!
633
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,700
Pretty good. Hey, give
me a hug, buddy. Yeah.
634
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:46,820
All right, hug. I'm sorry I doubted you.
635
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:49,500
Aw, you're so sweet. I'm
sorry I doubted you.
636
00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:51,540
That's...
637
00:24:51,640 --> 00:24:53,620
Mm. And that bag is another thing.
I was...
638
00:24:53,720 --> 00:24:55,420
I was convinced after
Leon got in my ear.
639
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,100
I thought that...
640
00:24:57,200 --> 00:24:59,020
That you were laundering
dirty money with that bag.
641
00:24:59,120 --> 00:25:00,740
Like Al Capone or something.
642
00:25:00,840 --> 00:25:02,380
That is ridiculous. Oh, my god.
643
00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:04,740
I was just... Dirty
money in a laundry bag.
644
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:06,180
I know. I know, I'm sorry.
645
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:07,980
That is funny, though. Yeah.
646
00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:10,220
Yeah.
647
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:12,960
Shoot, I never even looked in that bag.
648
00:25:21,160 --> 00:25:23,160
What?
649
00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:27,580
I'm gonna open it.
650
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:29,220
Okay.
651
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:30,660
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
652
00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:31,820
Let's not even open it.
653
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:34,820
Maybe it's better we don't know.
654
00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:37,100
I'm opening the bag.
655
00:25:37,200 --> 00:25:39,300
Ready? One, two,
656
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:41,460
three. Oh, fuck. Wait, wait, wait.
657
00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:43,620
Do you want to open it?
658
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:45,580
No, you do it. Go ahead, you're right.
You do it. You do it. Okay.
659
00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:48,240
Three, two, one.
660
00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:37,500
Guh-doosh.
46520
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