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1
00:00:01,263 --> 00:00:02,664
(THEME SONG PLAYING)
2
00:00:25,588 --> 00:00:28,323
We've come to you because
we have a very big problem.
3
00:00:28,391 --> 00:00:30,191
And who better
to come to than you?
4
00:00:30,259 --> 00:00:32,961
We had no idea planning a wedding
was gonna be so difficult.
5
00:00:32,996 --> 00:00:35,897
It's like riding a pogo
stick in a minefield...
6
00:00:36,032 --> 00:00:37,599
Boom! (SOFTLY) Boing.
7
00:00:37,667 --> 00:00:39,467
Boom! Boing.
8
00:00:42,638 --> 00:00:46,007
Come on, what's taking
you guys so long?
9
00:00:46,075 --> 00:00:47,709
Come on, come on, come
on, come on, come on!
10
00:00:56,252 --> 00:01:01,289
(SIGHING) Those are the
most beautiful dresses...
11
00:01:02,759 --> 00:01:04,225
I have ever seen!
12
00:01:05,028 --> 00:01:06,295
Oh, no.
13
00:01:08,264 --> 00:01:11,199
Topanga, do you think maybe
you're a little too emotional
14
00:01:11,267 --> 00:01:13,101
to make the right
decision about this?
15
00:01:13,169 --> 00:01:17,539
Those are the most
beautiful dresses I...
16
00:01:17,606 --> 00:01:18,907
Okay, okay, all right.
17
00:01:18,975 --> 00:01:20,309
Where's Morgan?
18
00:01:20,376 --> 00:01:22,211
I want to see how beautiful
my future sister looks.
19
00:01:22,278 --> 00:01:25,380
Hey, Morgan, come on out.
Share the joy.
20
00:01:29,552 --> 00:01:31,185
What are you, psycho?
21
00:01:32,655 --> 00:01:35,824
Morgan, you look
so beautiful.
22
00:01:35,892 --> 00:01:38,126
We look like clowns!
23
00:01:38,194 --> 00:01:39,494
Beautiful clowns.
24
00:01:39,562 --> 00:01:42,063
Cirque Du Soleil clowns.
25
00:01:42,131 --> 00:01:45,300
No, horn-honkin',
big-shoe-wearin' clowns.
26
00:01:46,001 --> 00:01:47,034
Honey...
27
00:01:47,102 --> 00:01:48,203
Shut up!
28
00:01:49,606 --> 00:01:50,671
I ain't wearin' it.
29
00:01:52,675 --> 00:01:56,278
Okay. So, you know,
just a little controversy
30
00:01:56,345 --> 00:01:58,914
over the bridesmaids'
dresses...
31
00:01:58,981 --> 00:02:01,482
But I really thought that if I
just expressed my feelings,
32
00:02:01,550 --> 00:02:02,984
everyone would
understand.
33
00:02:05,788 --> 00:02:07,055
See?
34
00:02:07,123 --> 00:02:09,090
They come with parasols!
35
00:02:11,327 --> 00:02:13,361
And the best part is
that after the wedding,
36
00:02:13,429 --> 00:02:15,897
you guys are obviously gonna
want to wear these dresses
37
00:02:15,965 --> 00:02:17,699
over and over again.
38
00:02:19,402 --> 00:02:20,735
(GRUNTING)
39
00:02:21,804 --> 00:02:23,805
Die, dress, die!
40
00:02:23,873 --> 00:02:25,940
Die! Die!
41
00:02:26,008 --> 00:02:27,909
Oh, my God!
Okay, honey!
42
00:02:27,977 --> 00:02:29,277
It's dead!
It's dead!
43
00:02:29,344 --> 00:02:30,946
It can't hurt
you anymore.
44
00:02:32,748 --> 00:02:36,318
(SIGHING) Okay.
Sweetie, how you doing?
45
00:02:36,386 --> 00:02:38,253
Good? You good?
You okay? Okay.
46
00:02:38,321 --> 00:02:41,490
Well, about these
lovely, lovely dresses...
47
00:02:41,557 --> 00:02:42,624
Maybe it's possible...
48
00:02:42,692 --> 00:02:44,025
That we are not...
49
00:02:44,093 --> 00:02:45,960
Lovely enough...
For them.
50
00:02:47,463 --> 00:02:48,697
Just cut the crap.
51
00:02:48,765 --> 00:02:50,632
At least Morgan was honest.
52
00:02:50,700 --> 00:02:53,568
Well, that's it. If you guys
can't put on these dresses
53
00:02:53,636 --> 00:02:56,938
and get caught up in the magic
of my Southern-belle wedding,
54
00:02:57,006 --> 00:02:58,706
(CRYING) then
who needs y'all?
55
00:03:00,143 --> 00:03:02,477
You're from
Philadelphia, stupid!
56
00:03:04,513 --> 00:03:06,047
CORY: ASouthern-belle wedding...
57
00:03:08,517 --> 00:03:10,952
When, uh, when did
we decide on that?
58
00:03:11,020 --> 00:03:14,022
Every wedding has to
have a theme, Cory.
59
00:03:14,090 --> 00:03:15,657
For what reason,
my darling?
60
00:03:15,725 --> 00:03:17,558
Because it does.
61
00:03:17,627 --> 00:03:19,227
For what reason,
my darling?
62
00:03:19,294 --> 00:03:22,196
I want ours to be
Gone with the Wind.
63
00:03:22,264 --> 00:03:26,835
Well, frankly, my dear,
that's not the theme I want.
64
00:03:26,902 --> 00:03:29,504
Really?
What's yours?
65
00:03:29,571 --> 00:03:32,507
"Have a nosh
with Cory and Topanga."
66
00:03:32,574 --> 00:03:34,308
Do you see what I'm
dealing with here?
67
00:03:34,376 --> 00:03:36,377
Plus, we have
a guest list of 270.
68
00:03:36,445 --> 00:03:37,912
And a hall
that seats 80.
69
00:03:37,980 --> 00:03:40,015
But we're not panicking, because we
know a lot of people won't show.
70
00:03:40,082 --> 00:03:42,117
And many of the old
people have shrunk.
71
00:03:44,153 --> 00:03:45,887
(SOBBING) I miss
Grandpa Poppy.
72
00:03:45,955 --> 00:03:47,221
We all do, honey.
73
00:03:47,289 --> 00:03:50,125
No one should die
in prison!
74
00:03:50,192 --> 00:03:52,794
See, while everyone else may be
going crazy over this wedding,
75
00:03:52,862 --> 00:03:55,030
we, at least, have been
keeping it together.
76
00:03:56,732 --> 00:03:58,366
For our honeymoon...
77
00:03:58,434 --> 00:04:00,135
(IN HIGH PITCHED VOICE)
Honeymoon!
78
00:04:01,604 --> 00:04:03,171
I was thinking we can
go trekking in Peru,
79
00:04:03,239 --> 00:04:04,339
scuba diving
in the Caribbean,
80
00:04:04,406 --> 00:04:06,474
or river rafting
down the Colorado.
81
00:04:06,542 --> 00:04:08,877
(LAUGHING)
It's not necessary.
82
00:04:08,945 --> 00:04:10,345
Cory, I've made
a ton of suggestions,
83
00:04:10,412 --> 00:04:12,147
and you don't
like any of them.
84
00:04:12,214 --> 00:04:13,849
Well, that's because
you haven't mentioned
85
00:04:13,916 --> 00:04:15,651
the one place
that I want to go.
86
00:04:15,718 --> 00:04:17,419
Where's that?
You know.
87
00:04:19,188 --> 00:04:20,822
Cory!
I want it.
88
00:04:22,224 --> 00:04:23,725
Cory, I'm beginning
to think this wedding
89
00:04:23,793 --> 00:04:25,293
is just a prelude
to sex for you.
90
00:04:25,361 --> 00:04:27,796
That's brilliant, Sherlock.
91
00:04:27,864 --> 00:04:29,031
Oh, so you're
just marrying me
92
00:04:29,098 --> 00:04:30,632
so we can consummate
our relationship?
93
00:04:30,699 --> 00:04:32,834
Me and 900 million
other guys.
94
00:04:34,036 --> 00:04:35,737
Wait. I'm beginning
to think you'd be fine
95
00:04:35,804 --> 00:04:38,206
if we just spent our
honeymoon in any old hotel.
96
00:04:38,874 --> 00:04:40,008
Or in the road.
97
00:04:41,844 --> 00:04:43,177
Cory, that's sick!
98
00:04:43,245 --> 00:04:45,647
That's sick?
I'm sick?
99
00:04:45,714 --> 00:04:47,516
You know what's
sick, everyone?
100
00:04:47,583 --> 00:04:50,852
We have been in a
relationship for 17 years,
101
00:04:50,953 --> 00:04:53,989
and do you know what I've
gotten in all that time?
102
00:04:54,056 --> 00:04:55,690
Let me touch
something!
103
00:05:02,131 --> 00:05:04,365
Do you understand
that you owe me?
104
00:05:06,635 --> 00:05:07,669
Yes.
105
00:05:07,737 --> 00:05:09,137
Do you intend
to pay me?
106
00:05:09,939 --> 00:05:10,972
Yes.
107
00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:14,042
In the road?
Yes, in the road.
108
00:05:15,078 --> 00:05:16,945
And you'll call me
Don Francisco?
109
00:05:20,316 --> 00:05:21,816
Yes.
110
00:05:21,884 --> 00:05:23,518
Yes, who?
111
00:05:23,586 --> 00:05:25,554
Yes, Don Francisco.
112
00:05:26,722 --> 00:05:28,022
All right,
I'll marry you.
113
00:05:38,901 --> 00:05:40,568
But see, that was
only the beginning.
114
00:05:40,636 --> 00:05:42,637
Yes. Planning the wedding
got a lot worse.
115
00:05:42,705 --> 00:05:45,707
Because the next thing I had
to do was pick a best man.
116
00:05:45,775 --> 00:05:48,309
Now, obviously, the choice
came down to my brother...
117
00:05:48,977 --> 00:05:50,745
Or my best friend.
118
00:05:50,747 --> 00:05:53,681
Hey, Cor, listen, as far
as the wedding goes,
119
00:05:53,750 --> 00:05:54,883
I'm sure you're under
a lot of pressure
120
00:05:54,951 --> 00:05:56,451
about the whole
best man situation.
121
00:05:56,518 --> 00:05:58,586
Yeah, I wanted to talk
to you about that.
122
00:05:58,654 --> 00:05:59,687
I think you should
pick Eric.
123
00:06:00,489 --> 00:06:02,056
It's the right thing to do.
124
00:06:03,192 --> 00:06:04,292
My best friend,
125
00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:07,529
my absolute best friend
who I love...
126
00:06:07,597 --> 00:06:09,164
Cory, we get it.
Get on with it.
127
00:06:09,232 --> 00:06:12,634
My point is, he's the
greatest guy there is.
128
00:06:12,701 --> 00:06:14,636
You're the greatest
guy there is.
129
00:06:14,704 --> 00:06:17,138
Hey, it's no big deal.
I understand completely.
130
00:06:17,206 --> 00:06:21,076
Well, he's... He's family. He's blood.
He's your brother.
131
00:06:21,143 --> 00:06:22,944
No bond is more
sacred than that.
132
00:06:27,216 --> 00:06:30,117
You know he's gonna drop the
rings down the minister's pants.
133
00:06:31,620 --> 00:06:33,321
And dive right in
after them.
134
00:06:33,389 --> 00:06:35,623
With both hands, causing
the minister to freak.
135
00:06:35,691 --> 00:06:36,757
And cough.
136
00:06:36,825 --> 00:06:38,960
And cough.
137
00:06:39,027 --> 00:06:40,228
And then knock
over the candles
138
00:06:40,296 --> 00:06:41,696
and set the entire
church on fire.
139
00:06:43,031 --> 00:06:44,532
And here comes
the fire department
140
00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:47,034
with their hoses and axes,
chopping up everything in sight,
141
00:06:47,103 --> 00:06:48,436
and Topanga's
gonna blame...
142
00:06:48,504 --> 00:06:49,704
Me.
143
00:06:51,407 --> 00:06:54,242
And I don't get nothin'
on the honeymoon!
144
00:06:57,780 --> 00:06:59,014
Shawn, give me
one good reason
145
00:06:59,081 --> 00:07:01,516
I should pick Eric
as the best man.
146
00:07:01,583 --> 00:07:03,518
Because I'm bigger
than he is
147
00:07:03,585 --> 00:07:06,121
and stronger
than he is.
148
00:07:08,624 --> 00:07:09,957
So?
149
00:07:10,025 --> 00:07:12,260
So? So?
150
00:07:12,327 --> 00:07:13,695
So don't you want somebody
who's strong enough
151
00:07:13,763 --> 00:07:14,796
to lift you up
for the traditional
152
00:07:14,864 --> 00:07:16,764
"For he's a jolly
good fellow" dance?
153
00:07:16,832 --> 00:07:19,234
I've actually never heard of the "For
he's a jolly good fellow" dance.
154
00:07:19,301 --> 00:07:20,735
Oh, here, I'll show you.
No, I prefer that...
155
00:07:20,803 --> 00:07:22,337
No, you're gonna love it!
No, Eric, I...
156
00:07:22,404 --> 00:07:24,605
Eric, you're gonna
knock over the candles!
157
00:07:25,941 --> 00:07:27,642
For he's a jollygood fellow
158
00:07:27,710 --> 00:07:28,609
For he's a jollygood fellow
159
00:07:28,677 --> 00:07:30,245
(FIRE ALARM RINGING)
160
00:07:30,312 --> 00:07:32,447
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Look,
it's happening! (SIRENS WAILING)
161
00:07:32,515 --> 00:07:33,915
Eric! Look
what you did!
162
00:07:33,982 --> 00:07:35,149
Eric!
Oh!
163
00:07:35,218 --> 00:07:37,018
The curtainsare on fire
164
00:07:37,086 --> 00:07:38,719
The curtainsare on fire
165
00:07:41,056 --> 00:07:42,690
They're chopping upthe dorm room
166
00:07:42,758 --> 00:07:44,592
They're chopping upthe dorm room
167
00:07:44,660 --> 00:07:46,827
My brother is a moron
168
00:07:46,895 --> 00:07:48,996
Which nobody can deny
169
00:07:51,367 --> 00:07:52,434
(YELLING)
170
00:07:59,342 --> 00:08:01,008
And that's why
Shawn's my best man,
171
00:08:01,076 --> 00:08:02,344
and Shawn's my best man,
172
00:08:02,411 --> 00:08:05,480
and I don't want to hear
anything from anybody!
173
00:08:05,548 --> 00:08:07,382
(SIGHING)
You talk now.
174
00:08:07,450 --> 00:08:10,285
I've got, like, a rip
here, in my pancreas.
175
00:08:10,353 --> 00:08:12,920
He's always so tense.
I don't know why that is.
176
00:08:12,988 --> 00:08:15,457
No, but you know where
the shoe department is.
177
00:08:16,726 --> 00:08:18,226
Can we please talk about
something positive?
178
00:08:18,294 --> 00:08:19,927
What was positive?
179
00:08:19,995 --> 00:08:21,829
Well, how about those talks
you had with your father,
180
00:08:21,897 --> 00:08:24,733
how proud he is
of his little man?
181
00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:27,235
Yeah, Dad and I had
some talks, all right.
182
00:08:27,269 --> 00:08:29,270
You chose Shawn
as your best man
183
00:08:29,338 --> 00:08:32,040
over your own flesh and blood?
You're dead to me.
184
00:08:32,108 --> 00:08:33,808
What did I just hear?
185
00:08:33,810 --> 00:08:35,509
"You're dead to me."
186
00:08:35,577 --> 00:08:38,046
Your husband just said
that to your own son.
187
00:08:38,114 --> 00:08:39,347
Alan!
188
00:08:39,349 --> 00:08:41,182
Do you have any idea
how scarring that is?
189
00:08:41,250 --> 00:08:44,418
Alan! He chose Shawn
as his best man.
190
00:08:44,987 --> 00:08:46,220
You scum.
191
00:08:47,089 --> 00:08:48,490
Sit down.
192
00:08:48,557 --> 00:08:51,158
Yeah, sit down, scum.
193
00:08:51,226 --> 00:08:54,161
Let me tell you what
happened to this family.
194
00:08:54,229 --> 00:08:55,696
Your mother and I met,
195
00:08:55,764 --> 00:08:57,632
and we fell in love,
and we got married,
196
00:08:57,700 --> 00:09:00,267
and from that love,
we had a son.
197
00:09:03,505 --> 00:09:08,042
And we were a family,
your mother, me, and Eric.
198
00:09:08,109 --> 00:09:10,378
And yet,
there was a void.
199
00:09:10,446 --> 00:09:13,080
And Eric, more than anything
else, wanted a baby brother...
200
00:09:13,148 --> 00:09:15,416
More than anything else.
201
00:09:15,484 --> 00:09:17,218
I love you, Cory.
202
00:09:17,286 --> 00:09:21,990
And we had you, Cory,
and Eric had a brother.
203
00:09:22,057 --> 00:09:25,159
And the two of you could go
through the world together.
204
00:09:25,227 --> 00:09:27,828
Looking out for each other,
taking care of each other.
205
00:09:27,896 --> 00:09:29,063
Putting each other first.
206
00:09:29,131 --> 00:09:30,298
That's all I wanted.
207
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,102
Now, we haven't asked
much from you.
208
00:09:34,170 --> 00:09:36,537
But they're gonna
ask something now.
209
00:09:36,605 --> 00:09:40,541
It's your decision, but if
it means anything to you,
210
00:09:40,609 --> 00:09:43,644
we would like your brother
to be your best man.
211
00:09:45,781 --> 00:09:48,682
Yeah. Fine, good.
Whatever you want.
212
00:09:48,750 --> 00:09:51,586
Yeah! Eric Matthews, best man!
213
00:09:51,653 --> 00:09:53,588
(CHUCKLING) I accept,
my brother!
214
00:09:53,655 --> 00:09:55,223
Hey, you know something, I kind
of knew that was gonna happen.
215
00:09:55,290 --> 00:09:57,492
Had a little
feeling, so...
216
00:09:57,494 --> 00:09:59,294
I think this calls for
a celebration, hmm?
217
00:09:59,361 --> 00:10:00,361
(CHUCKLES)
218
00:10:00,429 --> 00:10:01,696
Watch this.
219
00:10:04,199 --> 00:10:08,035
This is the eternal flame
of the love of the Matthews.
220
00:10:08,103 --> 00:10:09,170
Hot!
221
00:10:09,238 --> 00:10:10,605
(SIZZLING)
222
00:10:19,148 --> 00:10:20,348
(FIRE ALARM BEEPING)
223
00:10:20,415 --> 00:10:21,783
He's out!
Shawn's in!
224
00:10:21,851 --> 00:10:24,519
Somebody save the baby!
Somebody save the baby!
225
00:10:28,857 --> 00:10:30,692
Sparklers are fun!
226
00:10:35,130 --> 00:10:39,700
So, anyway, I have my best
man, and I'm very happy.
227
00:10:39,768 --> 00:10:41,469
I'm not.
Yes, but I am.
228
00:10:42,405 --> 00:10:45,806
And I am Don Francisco.
229
00:10:45,874 --> 00:10:49,811
I mean, I know it was supposed
to be an honor and everything,
230
00:10:49,879 --> 00:10:51,980
but, come on.
231
00:10:52,047 --> 00:10:56,584
(SIGHING) Come on, what's
taking you so long?
232
00:10:56,651 --> 00:10:59,721
Come on, come on, come on,
come on, come on, come on!
233
00:11:08,463 --> 00:11:11,599
Oh! Will you look at that?
234
00:11:11,667 --> 00:11:14,135
My wedding dress
fits you perfectly!
235
00:11:19,374 --> 00:11:21,709
I mean, I don't
want to offend anyone,
236
00:11:21,777 --> 00:11:25,480
and my family's feelings are the
most important thing to me,
237
00:11:25,547 --> 00:11:26,881
but if she thought
I was getting married
238
00:11:26,949 --> 00:11:27,949
in that
freaking monstrosity,
239
00:11:28,016 --> 00:11:29,984
she must have been
hitting the sauce.
240
00:11:30,819 --> 00:11:32,520
Very nice.
241
00:11:32,588 --> 00:11:34,722
I want you to know
that this gown
242
00:11:34,790 --> 00:11:37,292
has been in my family
since the Civil War.
243
00:11:39,295 --> 00:11:42,363
Musty little devil,
ain't it?
244
00:11:42,430 --> 00:11:45,466
Every woman in my family history
that has worn this dress
245
00:11:45,534 --> 00:11:47,802
has had a long
and healthy life.
246
00:11:47,869 --> 00:11:51,038
In fact, except
for the engagement ring,
247
00:11:51,106 --> 00:11:53,507
which I already
gave to you,
248
00:11:54,977 --> 00:11:57,879
there is no more important
possession that I own.
249
00:11:57,946 --> 00:12:01,983
So, please do me the honor
of being married in it.
250
00:12:04,319 --> 00:12:05,719
Oh...
251
00:12:06,755 --> 00:12:08,022
Pooh.
252
00:12:10,126 --> 00:12:13,094
(IMITATING TOPANGA) That is
the most beautiful dress
253
00:12:13,162 --> 00:12:16,264
I've ever seen!
254
00:12:16,331 --> 00:12:19,901
Oh, you're happy for your new sister.
That is so sweet.
255
00:12:19,969 --> 00:12:22,069
Yep. I think she
deserves that dress.
256
00:12:24,273 --> 00:12:25,540
Bite me!
257
00:12:28,243 --> 00:12:30,178
I don't know.
258
00:12:30,245 --> 00:12:31,913
I just lashed out.
259
00:12:32,915 --> 00:12:34,015
It was as if
I was possessed
260
00:12:34,082 --> 00:12:35,983
by the ghost
of your Nana Boo Boo.
261
00:12:36,051 --> 00:12:40,154
(CRYING) Nana Boo Boo!
I miss you!
262
00:12:41,323 --> 00:12:42,323
Is Nana Boo Boo dead?
263
00:12:42,390 --> 00:12:44,625
No.
No. Good, good.
264
00:12:44,693 --> 00:12:46,760
And so it was
at this crucial point
265
00:12:46,829 --> 00:12:48,196
of the chaos
which is our wedding,
266
00:12:48,263 --> 00:12:51,498
that we... We finally
decided to regain control
267
00:12:51,566 --> 00:12:55,937
and call in...
A professional.
268
00:12:56,005 --> 00:12:58,306
When Judy Haberfeld
plans your wedding,
269
00:12:58,373 --> 00:13:00,942
Judy Haberfeld
is there for you.
270
00:13:01,944 --> 00:13:05,246
From guest list
to guest last.
271
00:13:05,314 --> 00:13:09,150
(CHUCKLES) From first
dance to grand finale,
272
00:13:09,217 --> 00:13:13,220
there is no detail too
small for Judy Haberfeld.
273
00:13:13,288 --> 00:13:15,656
We've heard wonderful things
about you, Miss Haberfeld.
274
00:13:15,723 --> 00:13:19,794
Aw. Please, call me
Judy Haberfeld.
275
00:13:21,430 --> 00:13:23,731
Oh, hi, I'm so sorry we're late.
276
00:13:23,799 --> 00:13:24,965
Yeah, I hope we didn't
miss any of the planning,
277
00:13:25,033 --> 00:13:26,233
but you couldn't
be too far in
278
00:13:26,301 --> 00:13:28,603
because my wallet doesn't
feel any lighter.
279
00:13:29,905 --> 00:13:31,572
(MIMICKING ED MCMAHON)
Hey-oh!
280
00:13:31,640 --> 00:13:33,040
(CHUCKLES) Oh, my.
281
00:13:33,108 --> 00:13:35,142
All right, well,
that's enough.
282
00:13:36,144 --> 00:13:38,479
Um, about the guest list,
283
00:13:38,546 --> 00:13:41,683
I understand
this hall seats 80,
284
00:13:41,750 --> 00:13:44,585
but I can't possibly
fit more than 65
285
00:13:44,653 --> 00:13:47,921
with the theme
our bride has in mind.
286
00:13:48,590 --> 00:13:49,957
But we invited 270.
287
00:13:51,493 --> 00:13:52,627
(LAUGHS)
288
00:13:53,729 --> 00:13:56,597
All right, now,
I understand
289
00:13:56,665 --> 00:13:58,232
that the father of the groom
290
00:13:58,299 --> 00:14:00,935
has agreed to pay for the
beverages and the music,
291
00:14:01,003 --> 00:14:03,303
and with the budget
you have allowed me,
292
00:14:03,371 --> 00:14:07,341
I have assembled your musical...
Choices over there.
293
00:14:15,183 --> 00:14:16,517
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
294
00:14:19,221 --> 00:14:21,588
Cruise business
a little slow, boys?
295
00:14:21,656 --> 00:14:22,790
ALL: Yeah.
296
00:14:24,359 --> 00:14:25,893
Don't worry, Cor,
I got you covered.
297
00:14:25,961 --> 00:14:27,828
Hey-oh!
298
00:14:27,896 --> 00:14:29,296
Come on in!
299
00:14:29,364 --> 00:14:30,899
(TRUMPET PLAYING)
300
00:14:40,209 --> 00:14:41,241
Oh, yeah!
301
00:14:45,180 --> 00:14:47,448
Do you have any idea
how hard it is...
302
00:14:47,516 --> 00:14:48,983
To keep a smile
on your face...
303
00:14:49,051 --> 00:14:51,318
Under these
circumstances?
304
00:14:53,054 --> 00:14:54,655
Isn't it wonderful, Cory?
305
00:14:56,224 --> 00:14:57,992
George and his jazz group
have agreed to be the band
306
00:14:58,059 --> 00:15:01,195
at your reception
for free!
307
00:15:01,263 --> 00:15:03,998
Consider it my present
to the bride and groom.
308
00:15:06,535 --> 00:15:08,669
A blender would have
been just lovely.
309
00:15:10,505 --> 00:15:12,406
Now, if I can just figure out
how to water down the drinks,
310
00:15:12,474 --> 00:15:15,109
I could get out of this whole
thing for about 70 bucks!
311
00:15:17,479 --> 00:15:19,080
(SINGSONG VOICE)
Georgie?
312
00:15:22,351 --> 00:15:26,087
Georgie Feeny,
is that you?
313
00:15:26,154 --> 00:15:28,356
Oh, please, no.
314
00:15:28,423 --> 00:15:32,460
Georgie, it's me, Judy
Haberfeld, Judy Haberfeld!
315
00:15:34,696 --> 00:15:36,798
Judy!
Haberfeld!
316
00:15:38,333 --> 00:15:39,933
You know,
I was gonna call...
317
00:15:40,001 --> 00:15:44,071
(STUTTERING) I was, but I moved...
Out of state.
318
00:15:44,139 --> 00:15:46,540
Uh, mission
for the government...
319
00:15:46,608 --> 00:15:48,576
Espionage.
320
00:15:48,644 --> 00:15:50,177
All very hush-hush.
321
00:15:51,079 --> 00:15:53,013
(IMITATES TELEPHONE RINGING)
322
00:15:54,516 --> 00:15:56,116
What do you got
for me, Chief?
323
00:15:58,620 --> 00:16:02,289
North Korea... Damn!
I'll be right there.
324
00:16:10,499 --> 00:16:12,132
Do you know,
they all do that...
325
00:16:13,902 --> 00:16:16,637
Every stinking one of them.
326
00:16:17,539 --> 00:16:20,341
But I plow on.
327
00:16:20,408 --> 00:16:23,844
Hey, Feeny just jumped over a
wall and landed in the pool.
328
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,683
Tell me, who is this person?
I'm Judy Haberfeld.
329
00:16:28,750 --> 00:16:30,618
Yeah, that's the name
he was screaming.
330
00:16:31,953 --> 00:16:33,320
What's up, guys?
331
00:16:33,388 --> 00:16:35,590
I don't know, we're
overbooked by, like, 1,000,
332
00:16:35,657 --> 00:16:36,757
and Dad's trying
to save money
333
00:16:36,825 --> 00:16:38,726
by using Feeny
as the band,
334
00:16:38,794 --> 00:16:40,828
and Topanga's left eye
is beginning to twitch.
335
00:16:40,896 --> 00:16:42,229
It is not!
336
00:16:45,033 --> 00:16:47,868
Well, Topanga, have I
got a surprise for you.
337
00:16:47,936 --> 00:16:49,036
Please, no.
338
00:16:49,104 --> 00:16:51,872
Ladies,
front and center!
339
00:16:52,607 --> 00:16:53,974
Let's go, come on!
340
00:16:55,143 --> 00:16:57,378
Huh? (CHUCKLING)
341
00:16:57,445 --> 00:16:59,013
Okay, who wants to go first?
342
00:17:02,750 --> 00:17:05,253
I totally love
my bridesmaid's dress.
343
00:17:06,688 --> 00:17:09,323
I totally love
my bridesmaid's dress.
344
00:17:12,894 --> 00:17:15,596
I feel like a delicate
Georgia peach in this dress,
345
00:17:15,664 --> 00:17:18,198
and I'm thrilled
to wear it. Thank you.
346
00:17:20,969 --> 00:17:23,437
I was very selfish and
inconsiderate yesterday.
347
00:17:23,505 --> 00:17:26,106
This is your wedding and I'm
going to tell you the truth.
348
00:17:28,843 --> 00:17:30,244
Your friends
are stinking liars!
349
00:17:30,312 --> 00:17:31,512
Shawn paid them
50 bucks each,
350
00:17:31,580 --> 00:17:33,481
and I wouldn't use this
dress to wipe my...
351
00:17:47,663 --> 00:17:50,063
Hello, everyone.
352
00:17:50,131 --> 00:17:52,833
Okay, don't do this. Look at me.
I'm begging you.
353
00:17:52,901 --> 00:17:53,967
Quiet, half-breed!
354
00:17:55,837 --> 00:17:57,238
There are some
people in this room
355
00:17:57,305 --> 00:18:00,374
who shall remain nameless,
Cory and Mommy and Daddy,
356
00:18:00,442 --> 00:18:03,344
that don't think
I'm best man material.
357
00:18:03,411 --> 00:18:06,114
Well, I'm sorry I have
to do this, Cory.
358
00:18:07,315 --> 00:18:10,084
Look, rethink this, all right?
It's a bad move.
359
00:18:10,151 --> 00:18:11,252
(TALKING GIBBERISH)
360
00:18:13,488 --> 00:18:15,189
You know something,
Topanga?
361
00:18:15,257 --> 00:18:17,358
If I can't be
the best man...
362
00:18:18,293 --> 00:18:19,993
Then I'm gonna
be the groom.
363
00:18:24,966 --> 00:18:26,167
Topanga, I love you.
364
00:18:27,902 --> 00:18:29,870
I've always loved you,
365
00:18:29,938 --> 00:18:33,007
ever since I saw you through
that peephole in the bathroom.
366
00:18:37,646 --> 00:18:40,615
And I know how you've secretly
longed for me as well.
367
00:18:42,584 --> 00:18:45,819
So, Topanga, let's just
drop this charade.
368
00:18:49,825 --> 00:18:52,059
Topanga, marry me,
and let's make nick-nick.
369
00:18:53,895 --> 00:18:55,196
Get him.
370
00:18:55,263 --> 00:18:57,064
(SCREAMING)
371
00:18:57,132 --> 00:18:59,367
TOPANGA: So, I'm afraid that
all of our horrible experiences
372
00:18:59,434 --> 00:19:00,968
have brought us here.
373
00:19:01,036 --> 00:19:03,237
We knew that planning a
wedding was gonna be tough,
374
00:19:03,305 --> 00:19:05,039
but I don't think
any of us
375
00:19:05,107 --> 00:19:06,640
are gonna survive
this engagement.
376
00:19:06,708 --> 00:19:08,675
There's no way we'll
make it until June.
377
00:19:08,743 --> 00:19:10,444
There's just no way.
378
00:19:10,512 --> 00:19:12,713
I'll do something
very bad to Eric.
379
00:19:13,415 --> 00:19:14,615
I will.
380
00:19:16,684 --> 00:19:18,719
Honey...
I know! I'm twitching!
381
00:19:19,221 --> 00:19:20,787
Back off!
382
00:19:20,855 --> 00:19:23,957
(SIGHING) Please, we're
asking you to understand.
383
00:19:24,026 --> 00:19:26,027
This wedding is the most
important day of our lives.
384
00:19:26,094 --> 00:19:31,598
But you people have turned this sacred,
beautiful event into a freak show.
385
00:19:31,666 --> 00:19:32,966
We all mean well,
we just don't think
386
00:19:33,035 --> 00:19:34,201
we're gonna be
able to survive
387
00:19:34,269 --> 00:19:35,569
an eight-month
engagement.
388
00:19:37,305 --> 00:19:39,040
We want to get
married next week.
389
00:19:39,107 --> 00:19:41,075
No wedding hall,
no fancy planner,
390
00:19:41,143 --> 00:19:43,511
just our friends
and family.
391
00:19:43,578 --> 00:19:45,046
All the people
who care about us
392
00:19:45,113 --> 00:19:47,581
right here, next
Friday night, 8:00.
393
00:19:47,649 --> 00:19:48,916
7:00 Central.
394
00:19:50,185 --> 00:19:51,718
FEENY: Uh, one question.
395
00:19:53,088 --> 00:19:54,655
Mr. Feeny?
396
00:19:54,722 --> 00:19:57,391
You're gonna go through with
it this time, aren't you?
397
00:20:20,148 --> 00:20:21,515
Okay, we're
finally doing it.
398
00:20:21,583 --> 00:20:22,950
We're getting married.
399
00:20:23,018 --> 00:20:25,352
And we want you to be there,
this time, next Friday night.
400
00:20:25,420 --> 00:20:26,987
You're gonna look
so cute in a tuxedo.
401
00:20:27,055 --> 00:20:28,222
Yeah, it's powder blue.
402
00:20:28,289 --> 00:20:29,824
No, it's not.
403
00:20:29,891 --> 00:20:31,658
Well, all our friends are gonna
be there, too, including you.
404
00:20:31,727 --> 00:20:32,893
It wouldn't be the
same without you.
405
00:20:32,961 --> 00:20:34,561
So please RSVP
to our web site...
406
00:20:34,629 --> 00:20:35,930
coryandtopanga...
One word.
407
00:20:35,997 --> 00:20:38,232
Dot com. See,
coryandtopanga, one word,
408
00:20:38,299 --> 00:20:40,667
is sort of like
a symbol of our unity.
409
00:20:40,736 --> 00:20:42,036
No, it's
a computer thing.
410
00:20:42,104 --> 00:20:44,739
Unity!
coryandtopanga.com.
411
00:20:44,806 --> 00:20:46,273
See you at our wedding.
412
00:20:46,323 --> 00:20:50,873
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