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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,240 --> 00:00:08,800 -Hi, Grant. -Hi, Linda. 2 00:00:08,840 --> 00:00:11,400 Er, Linda, can I have a raise? 3 00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:15,440 I have it on good authority that you've been stamping passports 4 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:19,240 with a Wild Bean Caf� loyalty stamp. Is that true? 5 00:00:30,840 --> 00:00:32,080 ? No doubt about it ? 6 00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:34,640 ? I'm on my way ? 7 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:36,400 ? Taking over ? 8 00:00:37,360 --> 00:00:39,160 ? I'm here to sta-ay-ay ? 9 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:40,880 ? We're teaming together ? 10 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:43,960 ? That's what I say-ay-ay ? 11 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:45,320 ? One way to do this ? 12 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:47,400 ? Taking over today! ? 13 00:00:49,520 --> 00:00:51,200 ? We're taking over ? 14 00:00:54,080 --> 00:00:56,280 ? We're taking over today ? 15 00:00:57,760 --> 00:00:59,360 Sir, sorry to keep you waiting... 16 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:01,160 It's a big day today at Northend. 17 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:03,320 They have interviews for a new border agent. 18 00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:05,200 Big day today at Northend. 19 00:01:05,240 --> 00:01:07,880 We have interviews for a new border agent. 20 00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:09,800 -Told you. -Some people absolutely hate 21 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:11,800 the interview process but I love it. 22 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:15,000 Gives me a chance to show them what I've got. [chuckles] 23 00:01:15,040 --> 00:01:17,960 -Clive! -Hey! Hey! 24 00:01:18,000 --> 00:01:20,720 I wasn't expecting to see you quite yet but, er, hi. 25 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:22,440 -Come here. -Good to see you. 26 00:01:22,480 --> 00:01:24,160 Oh, yes. 27 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:27,720 It's just a formality. They have to interview 28 00:01:27,760 --> 00:01:31,440 everyone and do it properly, erm... but... 29 00:01:31,480 --> 00:01:34,280 I'm pretty confident. 30 00:01:34,320 --> 00:01:36,560 It's just nice to be back in the building and... 31 00:01:36,600 --> 00:01:39,320 I'm a visitor this time. 32 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,320 But, er... 33 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:45,240 I might keep this thing for when I get my real badge back. 34 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:51,840 -Clive Hassler? -Mmm. 35 00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:54,960 But you can just call me Mr Hassler. 36 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:56,960 -[he laughs] -Right. 37 00:01:57,000 --> 00:02:02,240 OK, so it says on your CV that you have previous experience 38 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:05,760 as a border agent. Can you tell me a bit about that? 39 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:09,320 Erm, yeah, it was terrible. 40 00:02:09,360 --> 00:02:11,720 [laughs] Er, I hated it. 41 00:02:11,760 --> 00:02:15,640 [laughs] Erm, cos it was boring, 42 00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:17,960 and, er, stupid, 43 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:23,160 and my boss was this crazy woman. [laughs] 44 00:02:24,560 --> 00:02:27,000 So why did you leave the police force? 45 00:02:30,600 --> 00:02:33,360 Do you know the real answer? 46 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:35,560 Can I... 47 00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:37,920 have the gun? 48 00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:41,680 -Please? -No. 49 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,560 But it's my gun! 50 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:47,440 It was the thing about the gun, yeah. 51 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:52,160 So, listen, Clive, if it was up to me, I would let you start back today. 52 00:02:52,200 --> 00:02:54,600 -Great. Thank you. -But... Er, no. 53 00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:58,480 But you have to go online and fill in an official application form. 54 00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:00,720 Ah, er, really? 55 00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:04,040 Just cos last time I just did an interview. 56 00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:06,880 But, you know, things have changed, times move on, 57 00:03:06,920 --> 00:03:08,840 -more checks these days. -OK, got it. 58 00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:11,480 More checks. I understand. Well, I'll go and do that. 59 00:03:11,520 --> 00:03:14,600 -Alright? -Cool. I know you're not, erm... 60 00:03:14,640 --> 00:03:18,400 probably not supposed to say but what are my chances? 61 00:03:18,440 --> 00:03:22,120 Just fill in the application form, Clive, OK? 62 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:27,480 Sounds like a cricket. 63 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:31,160 While Clive hopes to get his old job back, 64 00:03:31,200 --> 00:03:33,880 two of the airports current employees, baggage handlers 65 00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:37,920 Mo Khan and Sujan Stevens, are hard at work. 66 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:42,680 Suj, you know, yeah? Your wife's good stuff is the goods. 67 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,400 -I mean, like... -Are you gonna eat it all? 68 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:47,720 Of course I'm gonna eat it all. Did I win the bet? 69 00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:50,640 -Yes. -That means I eat it all. You know the rules, baby. 70 00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:53,160 But on a positive note, bruv, 71 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:55,320 you never have to buy packed lunch cos of this, innit? 72 00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:57,400 Well, you gotta save the pennies, haven't you? 73 00:03:57,440 --> 00:03:59,680 Cos of the pension cuts coming up, innit? 74 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:03,960 -It just got announced. -Pension cuts?! 75 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:07,120 Classic management trick, yeah? 76 00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:10,080 Making changes without informing us. 77 00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:12,160 Er, they emailed us. 78 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,400 Double classic management trick, yeah? 79 00:04:16,440 --> 00:04:20,120 Informing us using a system they very well know we don't use now. 80 00:04:21,880 --> 00:04:24,960 I'm strictly Snapchat. I only use Snapchat. 81 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,200 Er, I still use email. 82 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:30,640 Do ya? It's cos girls don't like opening the laptop, 83 00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:33,080 attaching nude pictures of themselves and sending the emails. 84 00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:35,880 Snapchat's like... Wow! Bam! There's my pum and that. You understand? 85 00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:37,720 So Snapchat's me. 86 00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:40,120 I still use email. 87 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:42,520 Although Proctor briefs the team every morning, 88 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:44,560 occasionally circumstances dictate 89 00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:47,320 she has to call them together at short notice. 90 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:50,520 OK, so I've called this emergency meeting. Clive? 91 00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:54,120 Clive, what are you doing here? 92 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:57,560 I just thought I'd sit in ahead of coming back full-time. 93 00:04:57,600 --> 00:05:00,440 -Are you? -Clive, Clive! 94 00:05:00,480 --> 00:05:02,880 There hasn't been a decision yet. 95 00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:04,760 Oh, yeah. 96 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:06,560 -OK, yeah, sorry. -Yeah. 97 00:05:06,600 --> 00:05:08,120 -Thank you. -Good luck with the... 98 00:05:08,160 --> 00:05:09,800 whatever the emergency is. 99 00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:11,800 I'm not supposed to know! 100 00:05:11,840 --> 00:05:13,200 Off you go. 101 00:05:13,240 --> 00:05:15,280 Now, Ebola. 102 00:05:16,400 --> 00:05:19,840 There has been a resurgence of the Ebola virus, 103 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:22,320 so we need to be particularly careful with passengers 104 00:05:22,360 --> 00:05:26,080 arriving from Guinea, Liberia and Sierra Leone. 105 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,800 -Just those countries? -At the moment, yes. 106 00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:31,440 OK, but isn't that going to make us appear a bit prejudiced? 107 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:33,200 They're all African countries? 108 00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:36,160 Well, that's where the Ebola outbreak is-- 109 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:38,520 Yes, I realise that, I just think-- 110 00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:40,680 I know what you're trying to do here, Andy. 111 00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:43,400 Trying to impress a certain someone. 112 00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:47,960 Yeah, yeah, people do keep going on about that thing. 113 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:52,000 But, you know, lots of things happened a year ago. 114 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:57,000 Grant broke his pinky, but it healed and then we don't bang on about it... 115 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:59,120 all the time. 116 00:05:59,160 --> 00:06:02,720 We're looking for unsteady on the feet, disoriented, 117 00:06:02,760 --> 00:06:06,400 -high temperature. -Oh, how do you check for high temperature then? 118 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:09,160 It's not like we can just shove a thermometer up their backside 119 00:06:09,200 --> 00:06:11,040 while they wait in line, is it? 120 00:06:11,080 --> 00:06:13,160 Oh, welcome to the UK. Voop! 121 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:14,880 -Thank you. -[whistles] 122 00:06:14,920 --> 00:06:16,640 -OK, thank you. -[clicks] 123 00:06:16,680 --> 00:06:18,920 OK, meeting over. Thanks very much. 124 00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:21,520 -[they laugh] -Erm, Tariq, Andy. 125 00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:24,120 -Can I have a quick word? -[whistles] 126 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:25,880 [clicks] 127 00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:27,920 [whistles] 128 00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:32,160 -Workplace romances. -Oh, no! 129 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,920 Now, I know where you're coming from, I get it. 130 00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:38,600 I've been chased round enough filing cabinets in my time. 131 00:06:38,640 --> 00:06:42,200 -But it's inappropriate. -Say something, Tariq! Tell her. 132 00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:44,040 Yeah, you've got it wrong, it's nothing... 133 00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:47,160 I understand. I know how these things happen. 134 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:51,440 First, it's the longing glances over the desk. 135 00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:54,160 Then you're noticing wherever he is in the room. 136 00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:56,720 Before you know it, you're in the ladies' loo 137 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:59,280 with two in the pink and one in the stink. 138 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:02,000 -Oh, wow! -I draw the line there! 139 00:07:02,040 --> 00:07:03,960 -I draw the line there! -Yeah, thank you. 140 00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:06,480 Chief Inspector Proctor is not the only team member 141 00:07:06,520 --> 00:07:09,160 able to handle tricky issues with such delicacy. 142 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:13,600 Charlotte...like the potato. Next! 143 00:07:13,640 --> 00:07:16,360 Down at passport control, Agent Brodie is checking 144 00:07:16,400 --> 00:07:18,320 the temperatures of arriving passengers 145 00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:20,560 using a marginally less intrusive method 146 00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:22,680 than the original suggestion. 147 00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:24,640 Just, er... 148 00:07:24,680 --> 00:07:26,320 I'm just going to... No, no, it's OK. 149 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:29,440 I just need to check your temperature. 150 00:07:30,640 --> 00:07:33,800 And just like that. You're absolutely good to go. 151 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:37,000 Thank you. Next, please. Oh. 152 00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:40,440 Grant, management has said we can't eat or drink anything 153 00:07:40,480 --> 00:07:42,160 -ever again. -Did they? 154 00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:44,280 No, they said they're cutting our pensions. 155 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:46,200 They said that as well. 156 00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:49,000 Well, what do you want me to do about it? 157 00:07:49,040 --> 00:07:51,840 Well, you're the union rep, blood, so you know... 158 00:07:51,880 --> 00:07:56,000 OK, so how did you know that? 159 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:02,600 When I volunteered to be union rep I thought it would be like 160 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:05,680 doing fun things like weekends away doing paintball 161 00:08:05,720 --> 00:08:09,080 or crazy golf or singles darts. 162 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:12,360 But it's just not like that at all. 163 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:16,600 You think people are nice. It's a bit like Twitter, everyone's a cunt. 164 00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:19,320 We need you to step up to the plate, baby. Now's your time to shine. 165 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:22,200 -We need a fire brand. -We need a fire bandit. 166 00:08:22,240 --> 00:08:27,160 -Fire brand. -How about this, how about I speak to management about this? 167 00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:29,080 -Natural-born fire band, bruv, you know. -Fire brand. 168 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,840 Fire band the shit out of them, yeah? 169 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:34,800 -Salaam-Alaikum. -My guy, you know. Look at this guy. Thank you, madam. 170 00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:36,400 Fire brand! OK. 171 00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:38,960 Ah, next. Thank you. 172 00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:42,400 Ah...what a day. 173 00:08:42,440 --> 00:08:44,640 Step forward, just a touch. 174 00:08:44,680 --> 00:08:47,240 Ah, there we go, and... 175 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:51,160 So, Clive, thank you for your official application. 176 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,240 You're welcome. 177 00:08:53,280 --> 00:08:56,960 Your psychometric test results, they're a bit, erm... 178 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,880 They're a bit off. 179 00:08:58,920 --> 00:09:03,920 You've actually tested as a psychopath. 180 00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,200 [laughs] 181 00:09:06,240 --> 00:09:07,800 Really? 182 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:09,840 -Yeah. -[laughs] Wow. 183 00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:13,200 In general, how do you deal with conflict? 184 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:17,520 Oh, erm, well, I close my eyes, count to ten and walk away. 185 00:09:17,560 --> 00:09:21,280 But here you've written, "I would smash them in the face." 186 00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:25,200 I would count to ten and then punch them in the face. [laughs] 187 00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:28,160 It's a joke, a joke. I was trying to make you laugh. 188 00:09:28,200 --> 00:09:31,920 Yeah, but the problem is, Clive, it's not just me reading these. 189 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:37,720 Oh, yeah. There are other people, very important people. 190 00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:41,160 And also I'm being leant on from above, you know, 191 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:43,480 on the whole diversity issue. 192 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:46,800 I can be diverse. I can be diverse. 193 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:49,480 Can you? Can you be a woman? 194 00:09:53,760 --> 00:09:55,960 [Clive] How did it go? Erm... 195 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:00,600 Er... 196 00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:06,560 It's... It was good. 197 00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:10,280 Clive, I'm really sorry but we've gone with someone else. 198 00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:15,840 I'm sorry that I became a policeman. 199 00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:20,880 Do you want a cuddle? 200 00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:24,760 Yes. 201 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:27,680 She's made her decision, 202 00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:31,880 but there's, you know, there's still... 203 00:10:31,920 --> 00:10:35,720 Just gonna go home... 204 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:42,360 and work on being more diverse! 205 00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:52,440 At Northend Airport, Agent Grant Brodie is having a difficult day. 206 00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:54,720 As the union rep, he has to deal with complaints 207 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:56,320 about the upcoming pension cuts, 208 00:10:56,360 --> 00:10:58,560 whilst as a border agent staying vigilant 209 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:00,680 for any arriving passengers showing symptoms 210 00:11:00,720 --> 00:11:03,080 of the recent Africa Ebola outbreak. 211 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:07,840 Mr Martins, yeah. Sorry, it's a little thing, if you wouldn't mind... 212 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:10,800 Ah, yeah. Oh, how are you doing today? 213 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:13,640 Actually, I'm not feeling that great actually. 214 00:11:13,680 --> 00:11:18,600 Are you a little disorientated, slightly unsteady on your feet? 215 00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:20,520 A little. 216 00:11:20,560 --> 00:11:23,040 And where is it you've travelled from? 217 00:11:23,080 --> 00:11:27,120 -Sierra Leone. -Leone, OK. Sir, if you wouldn't mind stepping this way 218 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:29,360 and just coming with me? 219 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:32,480 -I haven't got much time. -Yeah, probably less than you actually think. 220 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:34,600 If you wouldn't mind coming this way, please? 221 00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:38,040 [Andy] That can be more dangerous cos your hands can freeze. 222 00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:39,342 So you'd have to wear gloves? 223 00:11:39,422 --> 00:11:42,120 You can but when are you gonna find gloves if there's a fire? 224 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,920 -Yeah, and it would take a while to... -Yeah, exactly. 225 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:48,080 Ahem, ladies loo. Proctor is so awkward. 226 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:50,920 Oh, right, yeah. You wanna talk about that? 227 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:55,520 -No. -Cos I've actually spent all morning repressing that memory. 228 00:11:55,560 --> 00:11:57,240 -That's smart. -Yeah. 229 00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,760 I think that's, I think that's about it. 230 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:03,160 -I do actually need to go, so... -Yeah. No, go... 231 00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:05,840 -Don't follow me in and fuck me. -No, er... 232 00:12:05,880 --> 00:12:09,000 I won't. Not gonna do that. 233 00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:11,840 Andy, I love her to bits. 234 00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:14,240 She's really cool. We get on really well. 235 00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:17,880 We're good mates. You know, some things just don't work out 236 00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:22,880 the way you thought they would, but she's cool, I'm cool and... Yeah. 237 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:25,240 Following emergency protocol, 238 00:12:25,280 --> 00:12:27,320 it's vital that Agent Brodie isolates 239 00:12:27,360 --> 00:12:30,040 the suspected Ebola victim as soon as possible. 240 00:12:30,080 --> 00:12:34,120 Absolutely. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Don't fucking die on me, Mr Martin. 241 00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:37,320 I don't know how to deal with, erm, fucking dead people. 242 00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:42,000 Jesus Christ! Oh, I'm gonna have to...gonna have to... 243 00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:50,040 Are you OK there, yeah? OK, don't go anywhere. 244 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:53,080 I'll be back very, very, very shortly. 245 00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:55,920 Grant, where have you been? We've been looking everywhere for you, bruv! 246 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,600 Yeah, I'm having a little bit of a nightmare right now. 247 00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:01,000 Yeah, everyone's having a nightmare, bruv. They've cut everything! 248 00:13:01,040 --> 00:13:03,080 -We've lost flexible working. -Flexible's gone. 249 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:05,080 -Reduced holiday. -Holidays are gone now. 250 00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:07,840 -No more final salary pension. -Final salary pension gone. 251 00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:11,360 Do you know what? I'll speak to management in a little bit. 252 00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:16,480 You have to give me a chance and I'll get back to you ASAP, OK? 253 00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:18,400 [groans] 254 00:13:18,440 --> 00:13:20,480 Feels like you're having a lickle pussy moment now. 255 00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:22,760 No, no, no, I'm not having a lickle pussy moment, no. 256 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:24,960 Looks like a two, two pussy moments at the moment. 257 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:26,400 I'm not having a two, two pussy moment. 258 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:28,080 Three, three pussy moments. 259 00:13:28,120 --> 00:13:30,640 There's no three, three pussy moment. 260 00:13:30,680 --> 00:13:32,480 -[groaning] -Right, OK. 261 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,400 Who's the guy that saved Scotland? 262 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:36,960 -Oh, what, Mel Gibson? -Yes, Lethal Weapon guy. 263 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:41,320 I'm Lethal Weapon. I'm Mel Gibson. I'm just going to deal with... 264 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:44,280 -You're that guy? -Let's get out of here. 265 00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:47,067 Let's get the fuck out of here, lightning! 266 00:13:47,147 --> 00:13:48,680 Right out of here now, OK? 267 00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:51,000 We are going on strike. 268 00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:53,200 -[Linda] This is regrettable. -[Grant] I'm sorry. 269 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:57,960 I feel like a double agent. But we're cool? 270 00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:00,400 -Yeah, oh, yeah. -Good. 271 00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:02,040 Er, oh. 272 00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:05,480 Erm, one more thing. 273 00:14:05,520 --> 00:14:08,960 There's a guy in the hold. Er... 274 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:14,720 Mr Martin, er... I think he's got Ebola. 275 00:14:16,400 --> 00:14:20,240 Agent Brodie's improvised picket line may be keeping the staff away from Ebola, 276 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:23,720 but as they don't know this, they seem slightly underwhelmed. 277 00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:25,840 What is that now? 278 00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:28,640 It's a brazier. You've got to have a brazier on a strike. 279 00:14:28,680 --> 00:14:30,960 -That ain't no brazier! That's a bin. -It's a brazier. 280 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,880 -Think you'll find that's a bin. -It's a bin but there's a fire. 281 00:14:33,920 --> 00:14:36,240 -Might be a brazier. -Thank you. It's a brazier. 282 00:14:36,280 --> 00:14:38,560 Whoa, my sister! Where are you going? 283 00:14:38,600 --> 00:14:41,120 Oh, I'm... I'm cold, so... 284 00:14:41,160 --> 00:14:43,800 If you cross that line, that makes you a scab. 285 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:46,120 T, can you have a word with your girl, please? 286 00:14:46,160 --> 00:14:48,200 -She's not my girlfriend. -That ain't what I heard. 287 00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:51,240 Well, what you heard is wrong, so stop it. 288 00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:53,960 It's what they said about Lady Di and Dodi as well, you understand? 289 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:57,080 -What a weird reference. -Grant, you're meant to be the fire brand here. 290 00:14:57,120 --> 00:14:59,520 -Can you get like a chant going or something like that? -All right. 291 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:01,960 -Well, what would Bob Crow do? -You, back to the protest. Thank you. 292 00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:05,920 [Grant] Together united, we'll never be divided! 293 00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:09,800 [all] Together united, we'll never be divided. 294 00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:13,360 -Oh! Oh! Oh! -Together united, we'll never be divided. 295 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:17,040 Together united, we'll never be divided. 296 00:15:17,080 --> 00:15:20,920 -Feel the ting, T! -Together united, we'll never be divided. 297 00:15:20,960 --> 00:15:23,080 Together united... 298 00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:25,160 No, I don't have a problem with protests. 299 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:28,920 I've been on loads of marches. I just have to be a bit careful, 300 00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:34,240 cos I can get a bit caught up in the moment. 301 00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:36,080 -Hey, hey! -Ho, ho! 302 00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:38,000 -Corporate greed! -Has got to go! 303 00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:39,600 -Hey, hey! -Ho, ho! 304 00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:41,640 -Corporate greed! -Has got to go! 305 00:15:41,680 --> 00:15:43,240 -Hey, hey! -Ho, ho! 306 00:15:43,280 --> 00:15:45,200 -Corporate greed! -Has got to go! 307 00:15:45,240 --> 00:15:47,240 Rah, you know. 308 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:49,720 Is she bashing at everything she does like that, yeah? 309 00:15:49,760 --> 00:15:53,400 -She's not my girlfriend. -I bet she wind on the cookie. 310 00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:56,520 -No, she's not my girlfriend. -"Ah, Tariq!" Come on now, T. 311 00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:58,920 Yeah, I think she does that as well. 312 00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:02,480 Left alone and unaware of the serious medical situation, 313 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:05,040 Clive is desperate to be useful. 314 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:08,280 -Chief! Hi! -I don't have time for this at the moment, Clive. 315 00:16:08,320 --> 00:16:11,760 My pass is for the whole day, but I heard there's a strike, 316 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:14,520 and I thought maybe I could help because I'm here. 317 00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:18,000 I doubt that. We have a situation, a seriously ill man in holding. 318 00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:20,720 Well, have you called an ambulance? 319 00:16:20,760 --> 00:16:24,480 Yes. He'll be more than an hour. He'll probably be dead by then. 320 00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:27,520 Actually, could you take him to hospital? 321 00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:32,040 It would be my privilege. 322 00:16:32,080 --> 00:16:34,720 Meanwhile, it's becoming clear to Agent Brodie 323 00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:39,200 that he and his strike colleagues may not necessarily be on the same page. 324 00:16:39,240 --> 00:16:41,640 -What do we want? -Pensions. 325 00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:44,000 -And when do we want them? -65. 326 00:16:44,040 --> 00:16:46,280 -Come on! What do we want? -Pensions. 327 00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:48,640 -When do we want them? -I want mine now! 328 00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:51,160 -When we're 65! -I want my pension now! 329 00:16:51,200 --> 00:16:54,360 -Gimme my pension now! -You won't get anything. 330 00:16:54,400 --> 00:16:56,840 -Is that not how it works? -You build up a pot. 331 00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:59,040 I think if we all say "now", we might get them now. 332 00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:01,400 -When do you want pensions? -When we're 65. 333 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:04,720 Back inside Proctor, like all good leaders, 334 00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:06,760 knows when to delegate. 335 00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:09,160 [groaning] 336 00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:14,440 -Ebola? -Shh, shh! 337 00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:19,080 -Why can't you take him? -I can't take him. 338 00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:22,400 I'm running every department here today. I'm snowed under. 339 00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:25,640 But I'll die. I don't even work here and I'm gonna die. 340 00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:30,720 Has he stopped breathing? Oh, God! Don't tell me he's stopped breathing! 341 00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:34,520 Ahh, we've got to get him to the hospital because... 342 00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:37,720 because we have to do the right thing and... 343 00:17:37,760 --> 00:17:40,560 That's what working at the border means. 344 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,680 It's about putting the welfare of people 345 00:17:43,720 --> 00:17:46,320 before our own, er... 346 00:17:46,360 --> 00:17:48,280 [mutters] 347 00:17:48,320 --> 00:17:50,720 -475, 475. -Clive! 348 00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:54,600 [groaning] 349 00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:59,440 [all] Together united, we'll never be divided! 350 00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:03,160 Together united, we'll never be divided! 351 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:11,800 Hi. I need your, I need your mask. Official business. 352 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:15,120 Well, I don't actually work here. 353 00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:18,520 I'm unemployed at the moment, trying to get my old job. 354 00:18:18,560 --> 00:18:20,880 I used to work here but they've given it to someone else. 355 00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:22,840 Something to do with I didn't tick the form. 356 00:18:22,880 --> 00:18:24,920 I just need one. That's great. Thank you. 357 00:18:24,960 --> 00:18:28,280 [all] Together united, we'll never be divided! 358 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:32,000 -Oh, yeah! -Together united, we'll never be divided! 359 00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:36,120 Together united, we'll never be divided! 360 00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:39,440 Together united, we'll never be divided! 361 00:18:48,360 --> 00:18:50,280 [groaning] 362 00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:53,040 Without any access to proper protective clothing 363 00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:55,800 or suitable transportation, Clive, nevertheless, 364 00:18:55,840 --> 00:18:58,888 shows great initiative in his bid to rush Mr Martin 365 00:18:58,968 --> 00:19:00,880 to hospital as soon as possible. 366 00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:03,880 Together united, we'll never be divided! 367 00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:06,160 Together united, we'll never be divided! 368 00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:09,000 Together united, we'll never be divided! 369 00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:12,880 [beeping] 370 00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:22,160 Er, that guy, he, erm, he has Ebola, so... 371 00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:27,720 Ah! Together united... 372 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:32,440 Telling Clive that he didn't have the job was, like, 373 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:36,120 punching a puppy repeatedly in the face. 374 00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:40,880 But he showed real initiative today and I'm not a monster. 375 00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:45,400 Maybe this outfit needs a Clive. 376 00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:49,600 And he's already got the uniform, so... 377 00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:52,920 -[Andy] You saved his life then? -[Clive] Yeah, I guess I did. 378 00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:56,000 Saved his life. I saved someone's life! [laughs] 379 00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:57,840 -[mobile ringtone] -Oh, sorry. 380 00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:01,560 Oh, it's Proctor. Sorry. 381 00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:03,840 Er, Chief? 382 00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:06,280 Really? 383 00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:10,480 Er, yeah, yeah, of course! 384 00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:13,320 Of course. What? Now? 385 00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:18,280 Yeah, OK, I'll be right there. Thank you. 386 00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,680 Oh, my God! I got my job back! 387 00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:23,520 [cheering] 388 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:27,200 [cheering and laughter] 389 00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,360 -Scab! -What? 390 00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:33,400 -Scab! -[all] Scab! Scab Scab! Scab! 391 00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:36,760 Scab! Scab! Scab! Scab! Scab! 392 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:40,320 As a delighted Clive Hassler re-joins the borderline team, 393 00:20:40,360 --> 00:20:43,480 he sheds some light on the mysterious Ebola victim. 394 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:46,960 Turns out it wasn't Ebola. Just food poisoning. 395 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:51,720 I can't tell you which airline, of course, 396 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:53,800 but, erm, 397 00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:57,120 just avoid travelling on any... 398 00:20:57,160 --> 00:20:59,440 Has someone changed my log-in? 399 00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:04,040 It's not Sweetguy88 any more. 400 00:21:04,080 --> 00:21:06,560 Sweetguy... 401 00:21:06,600 --> 00:21:09,040 It's good for the team to be back together, 402 00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:12,320 as the job vacancy has been occupied by its previous owner. 403 00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:14,720 Though Clive may never know just how close he came 404 00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:18,640 to getting his position filled by two surprising contenders. 405 00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:22,440 -Hello, Proctor. -Wagwan, my G. 406 00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:25,440 Yes, we're here about the job. 407 00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:29,120 Oh, what as border agents? 408 00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:30,880 [both] Yeah. 409 00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:33,560 OK, well, it's quite hard work. 410 00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:35,640 Can do that. Yeah, it's fine. 411 00:21:35,680 --> 00:21:38,280 -Night shifts? -We can do that, yeah. 412 00:21:38,320 --> 00:21:41,360 Dealing with the public. Strip and search, rectal examination. 413 00:21:41,400 --> 00:21:43,960 Fuck that! I ain't doing no rectal examination. 414 00:21:44,000 --> 00:21:46,240 I ain't putting my thumb in anybody's bum hole. 415 00:21:46,320 --> 00:21:47,720 I'm telling you this now, Suji! 416 00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:51,160 Suj! 417 00:21:51,210 --> 00:21:55,760 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 33695

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