Original subtitles

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- And, of course, as starting quarterback, Bella Dawson.

- What, what!

Sorry, it's just still so exciting.

- Anyway, so that's our starting lineup for next week.

Newt, you are not starting.

- Who did that?

- All right, one more thing.

Last week's game ball.

Normally we award this

to the most outstanding player of the game.

But last week, we had two outstanding players.

I'm awarding the game ball to both Sawyer and Troy.

- My wide receivers.

What! What!

Promise, last time.

- You guys, uh, cool with sharing?

- Of course, my good man.

Indubitably.

Care for a spot of tea?

- Oh, wonderful.

- I knew I never should have turned you guys

onto "Downton Abbey."

Dawson, a word.

- Coach, I know what this is about.

And, yes, I promise to keep my "What! What!" under control.

Well, that's not why I brought you in here,

but I appreciate that.

Yeah, look, Dawson, when you first joined the team,

I wanted you to learn the game.

Now that you've done that, it's time you learn

the other part of being a quarterback--leadership.

- You can count on me, coach.

- Good.

Because leadership is much more than throwing touchdown passes.

You gotta guys keep these guys on their workouts

and practice schedules, make sure they stay out of trouble,

go to class, wash my car.

- Wash your car?

- All a part of being quarterback.

But the most important thing a leader does...

is keep the team together at all costs.

You gotta keep an eye out for a potential problems.

Little things can turn into big things

if you don't nip them in the bud.

- Coach, I was captain of the cheer squad.

Problem solving was like the job description.

One time, Taylor and Madison were arguing over

whether we should yell

"Hustle!" or "Dynamite!"

And I made them turn their feelings into--

- Oh, that's great. Girl power.

- Congratulations on the game ball, guys.

Maybe someday when I'm a starter I'll get one of those, too.

"Yeah, buddy, it'll happen."

- Oh, yeah, right. - Oh, yeah.

- Wow, thanks, guys.

- All right, so what do you think about storing

our game ball in my basement?

I know a nice spot right between the photo of me fist bumping

Obama and the computer I used to fake that photo.

- That's an interesting idea.

But I need something to throw at my rooster in the morning

when I wanna sleep in.

Rooster's don't have snooze buttons.

- Why don't you guys leave it somewhere you'll both see it

every day?

- Above the urinals in the bathroom?

- Oh, good call.

- Oh, man.

- No, dummies.

The locker room.

- That could work, too.

- I mean, I guess.

-

You won't find me in the bleachers

- Yeah, that girl is one of us

- I'm made of spice and sugar

- She's pretty and pretty tough

- And add a little glitter

- The yard's in a cloud of dust

- And you got, you got

- A game changer, a player maker

Take the ball, she'll see it there

- I'm on a dream like team like living

Like one of the boys

- She got it going, going

She got it going on

- I'm gonna play like, Friday night, kick it

Like one of the boys

- She got it going, going

She got it going on

- One of, one of the boys

-

- It's weird.

You not being a part of the cheer squad this year.

It feels like the end of an era.

- Well, you may not have me for the bake sale,

but you do have... my snicker doodles!

Doodles, doodles, doodles!

This bake sale is gonna be awesome.

You'll make enough money to pay for the whole cheer retreat.

I'll help you get started right now.

- Hey, that's a dollar.

- Mm, this is so awesome.

You need to buy like four of these.

- Bella owes one dollar.

- Excuse me.

- Or maybe not, she did make them.

- Excuse me, how much are these cookies?

- This is a good cause, and we need the money.

- Make up your mind.

I'm trying to buy something here.

- I wanna buy something, too.

Your silence.

- How mean.

- Can you believe that guy?

I am not mean.

Am I?

- No.

That guy is rude.

Telling me to make up my mind.

I have no problem making up my mind.

Or do I?

- No way.

Yo, which one of you cheapstakes wants to buy a sugar cookie?

- So, coach, if I keep drinking these and put on

20 pounds of pure muscle, grow 8 to 10 inches in a month,

you think I could be a starter for the Bulldogs?

You ever considered ping pong?

You certainly have the bone structure.

Oh, I mean I--

- Oh, look, the bake sale's starting.

Snickerdoodles here I come.

- Good to see everybody's

following their workout schedule.

If anyone has any questions,

I took the weight-room orientation class.

- Hey, Bella, you wanna spot me?

- QB at your service.

- Uh, all right, I gotta warn you.

This is the get psyched portion of my workout so--

Ow!

Cardboard bruise.

- Troy, I might be awhile.

This machine will probably wear out before my arms do.

- Ah, no worries.

It'll give the Troy more time to practice my post-game interview.

I wanna come off as humble yet extraordinary.

- Yeah, 'cause nothing says humble like putting

a "the" in front of your name.

- This coming from a guy who wears a five-pound belt buckle.

We get it, you're from Texas.

We all are.

- Do they always argue like this?

- Well, they've always been competitive,

but things have gotten personal.

- I--I guess it makes sense.

Troy and Sawyer are both playing the same position.

And they both wanna be the number-one receiver.

I wonder if this is gonna be an issue.

You're a real funny guy, Troy.

Funny smellin'.

- I think you're smelling my butt,

because you're so slow, you're always behind me.

- So your butt smells?

- Yeah.

Wait.

You know what I mean.

- Whoa, guys, can we please just agree

that everybody's butt smells?

Now let's get back to getting buff!

- Okay.

I'm gonna do some sit-ups.

I think I'll do about 500.

- Wait, yeah, well, I'm gonna 501.

- Oh, man, this is gonna be an issue.

I've gotta do something about this.

- Bella, help.

- Oops, sorry, Newt.

- You saved my life.

But hurt my pride.

- On the other hand, if you want sweet and salty,

I'd go with the salted caramel brownies.

- Great, I'll have those.

- Then again...if you just want something salty, oh,

I'd go to the vending machine and get some barbeque chips.

- Ooh, barbeque does sound good.

Thanks.

- No problem.

What?

She just wanted some chips.

- Pepper, you just lost us a sale.

You keep giving customers 30 choices, including the option

to not buy anything at all.

You're completely indecisive.

- Well, you're mean.

You made that one girl cry.

- She was trying to pay with pennies.

- She was six.

- Oh my gosh, I am mean.

- You are.

And I kinda think I might be indecisive, maybe.

- No wonder we haven't been selling anything.

- We can't handle this at all without Bella.

I need a brownie.

Or a lemon square.

These flavors do not blend well.

- No, we can handle this on our own.

We just have to change our approach.

From now on, I'll be nice and you'll be--

- Mm, there's so many different things I could be.

A doctor, a lawyer.

The president.

- Pepper.

- Decisive.

I will be decisive.

- Hey, guys.

Thanks for coming.

So I was thinking maybe we could do some team-bonding exercises

I used when I was cheer captain.

- Okay, fine. - That's weird.

- Okay, Newt's gonna help demonstrate the first exercise.

This is a trust fall.

Before you fall, tell me one fear that you want to let go of.

I'm afraid of trust falls.

I feel so alive.

- All right.

Sawyer, you go first.

Troy, you catch him.

Sawyer, what's your fear?

- I'm afraid of the goat man.

- Yeah, I don't know what the goat man is,

but we're not doing that.

- I don't know, goat man sounds pretty scary to me.

- Newt, focus.

- All right, Sawyer, why don't you talk about another fear?

Maybe something team related, like--just a thought--

what y'all been arguing about all week.

- Arguing?

We haven't been arguing?

We're just kidding around.

- Yeah, Bella, we're bros.

It's what we do.

- Come on, guys, I think it's pretty obvious

what's going on here.

You're sharing the same position now, and you both wanna be

the number-one receiver.

- Why would I be afraid of that?

I've mean a great wide receiver for years,

and I've got the game ball to prove it.

- Uh, half the game ball.

And don't forget, I wasn't even a wide receiver

at the start of the season.

And I already caught up to you.

Next week, I'm gonna have that game ball all to myself.

Deal with it, Huggins.

- Well, what if I don't wanna deal with it?

- Hey, hey, can't we just go back to the trust falls?

I'm afraid this isn't working.

- I'm okay.

- Okay, uh...let's try another technique I used

when I was cheer captain.

Express yourself in the form of an "I feel" statement.

- Fine.

I feel Troy's a jerk, and I feel sick of him always

having to be the best.

- And I feel like somebody's a big baby,

just like at peewee sleepaway camp.

Sawyer pee-weed all up in his sleeping bag.

- At least I didn't cry myself to sleep every night

like Teary Troy the Blumper Boy.

- Use "I feel" statements.

- Fine, I feel like my fist belongs in your face.

- Oh, yeah?

Well, I feel like my foot belongs

somewhere it's not polite to talk about.

- I feel like I'm gonna puke.

- Argh!

- Guys, stop!

You're teammates, stop it, break it up!

- Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Break it up!

Troy, Sawyer, get in my office now!

- But, coach--

- I don't wanna hear it!

- What are you gonna do to them?

- I'm suspending them from the team.

- Does anyone have an extra toothbrush in their locker?

-

- Coach, let me explain.

It was a misunderstanding.

- I know what I saw.

This is a no-fight zone.

- Come on, coach, they were working out a thing,

and it got a little out of hand.

But they were over it by the time you came in.

Right, guys?

- Uh, yeah.

I'm totally over it, coach.

- I was over it even before he was over it.

- Oh, yeah, well, I feel--

- Anyway...coach, you put me in charge.

So why don't you trust me on this and let me lead?

Also I can wash your car for you later.

- Well, I mean, it would be a shame to suspend

my two best receivers for a little--

- Thing that will never happen again.

I personally guarantee it.

Trust me.

Show 'em.

Hug it out.

See?

Okay, that's enough.

- Get out, get out.

Get out, before I change my mind.

Dawson?

It's the white SUV.

It has a bumper sticker "I brake for snickerdoodles."

- That was close.

But at least I got you guys out of that mess.

Now let's work this out.

- Look, I've already worked it out.

If you don't make me the number-one receiver tomorrow,

I quit.

- And if you don't make me the number-one receiver,

then I quit.

- What?

I--I can't choose between you.

- Come on, Newt, we're going to the Starcade.

- No, Newt, come with me.

We'll play video games at my house.

- Newt, you're coming with me, right?

No, he's coming with me.

- Newt!

- Newt!

- Oh, no, I already have divorced parents.

I can't have divorced best friends.

Who's gonna get my on Christmas?

- Oh, whatever, Newt.

- Look, this isn't ideal, but don't worry, I'm gonna fix this

just like I did at cheerleading camp.

- No offense, Bella, but this isn't cheerleading.

You can't just wave some pompoms around and then abra-caba-sho-ba

and everything's fine.

- Look, you have no idea what I dealt with on cheer.

How's this for a problem?

Seven teenage girls and one Katy Perry ticket.

I solved that, and only one girl got stitches.

Look, you can barely even see the scar.

The point is, I can handle this.

- I hope you're right.

I don't have anything left to barf.

Maybe I do!

-

- Right, I can do this.

I'm nice.

Hey, welcome to the bake sale.

Buy a cupcake.

They're pretty sweet, just like...

you.

- Mm, what do you think I should get?

- A brownie.

- I don't know, I'm kinda feeling--

- I've decided.

You'll have a brownie.

- No, but I think maybe--

- That'll be one dollar.

- I gotta get to class.

- I didn't hear the bell ring.

- Yeah, neither did I.

- I don't get it.

We're being the opposite of ourselves,

and the sale is even more of a disaster.

- The sale's almost over.

And the only thing in that cashbox

is a receipt for the cashbox.

We won't be able to go on the retreat.

- The girls won't be happy.

They'll replace us as captains because we'll be responsible

for the first-ever bake sale fail.

- We can't fail.

We have to try harder.

We can do this.

I have an idea.

Buy a cupcake, get a free hug.

- Sophie, that's a headlock, not a hug!

-

- There he is, all-star receiver

Troy "The Wonder Boy" Dickson.

- What do you want, Bella?

- I know you were mad yesterday fighting with Sawyer.

But I also know you love football more than anything.

So why don't you put this silly fight aside

and come back to the team?

- Are you gonna make me number-one receiver?

- Yah, you're gonna be number-one receiver...

every other day.

See, I made a schedule.

Monday's Troy, Tuesday's Sawyer, Wednesday Troy again.

Sawyer, look what I got you.

A new belt buckle.

- Oh, it has a number one on it.

Does that mean I'm the number-one receiver?

- You're the number one receiver...of this belt buckle.

- I'd admit, you are good, Bella.

- Does this mean you're coming back to the team?

- No, it means I have a hat that'll look great with this.

- Troy, I've decided.

If you come back to the team,

I'm making you the number-one receiver.

- I don't think you're telling the truth.

- Why?

- Because your fingers are crossed behind your back.

- Fine, walk away.

I'm not gonna beg you.

I can't believe you're making me beg you.

Come on, Sawyer, come back!

Walk away, see if I care.

This team will be fine without you.

And hut!

-

- Uh.

I got it.

Uh.

-

- Ugh!

Injury.

Time out, time out.

- Time out?

That didn't even hit you.

- I can't play receiver.

I've gotta put on 20 pounds of muscle.

And I still got 22 pounds to go.

- We're going to survive without Troy and Sawyer.

I'm gonna make you a starter, and the Bulldogs will be fine.

What's wrong?

This is what you wanted.

- Well, yeah, I've always wanted to be a starter,

but not like this.

Troy and Sawyer won't even talk to each other.

I'm stuck in the middle.

Oh, no.

Who's got me this weekend?

- I've tried everything to get them on the team.

But it's impossible.

Those guys are such stubborn, competitive boneheads.

- It's not about football, Bella.

It's about friendship.

They've been inseparable since the first day

at peewee football camp.

- You're right.

I've been looking at this the wrong way.

If I want to save the team, I've gotta save the friendship.

- Do it fast, Bella.

Ever since they broke up, I've been having nightmares

about the goat man.

His hairy legs, his horns

and his hoofs and--

- We've barely sold anything.

We're even worse at selling as other people

than we are as ourselves.

- All right.

Let's round up a hundred to-go boxes and call it a day.

- Hi, Katie.

- Hey, do you guys have any blondies?

- Yep, we have those.

But we also have five other options that are all so good.

I can't even decide what's best.

- Sounds good.

I'll give you five bucks for one of each.

- Six.

I know what you get for allowance, princess.

- Fine.

- Did that just happen?

- We made a sale.

And we did as our old selves.

- We didn't need to change.

We just needed to be totally flawed together.

- Hey, you look like you're in the mood

for some peanut butter balls.

Or perhaps some butterscotch cookies.

Or salted chocolate squares.

- They all sound great.

Do you have change for a ten?

- Nope, have a nice day.

- Thank you.

- Bye-bye now.

-

- All right, guys, I understand that only one of you

can be the number-one receiver.

And the other will never play on this team again.

I'm deciding who stays and who goes through a test

of mental strength and endurance.

Whichever one of you can keep his hand on the ball the longest

will be my number one.

- This is how you're choosing?

- This is so lame.

- The challenge starts now.

You're going down!

- Man, this is gonna be easy.

And when I win, I'm gonna do my victory dance.

Here's a little preview.

Go, Troy.

Go, Troy.

Go, Troy.

- Calm down, Beyonc?.

Here's what a real touchdown dance looks like.

The Huggin Shuffle.

- Is that a dance or are you just trying

to pull your pants up?

- Don't get mad 'cause you got served.

- What?

Oh, no, you got served.

What's up?

Bring it.

- Okay.

While you guys are serving and whatnot, I'm gonna set up

a little visual presentation.

It starts at the peewee football camp where you first met.

- Look, there's you peewee sleeping bag

BP--before pee-pee.

But actually, Troy, your mom, who I got these pictures from,

told me that when Sawyer had his accident,

you shared your sleeping bag with him.

- My mom is a liar.

- And when all the other campers were making fun of Troy,

calling him "Teary Troy the Blumper Boy,"

there was only one person who stood up for him.

- Oh, no, no, I--I got that because I got in a fight

with the local...bear.

- Bella, give it up, okay?

You're not gonna trick us into getting over this

by showing us some sappy pictures from our childhood.

- Oh, okay.

Then I guess there's no point in showing you this last picture.

- That was the day you asked me to be your best friend.

- And that was the day you said yes.

- See?

What's more important?

Being number-one receiver or this beautiful bromance?

I think you know the answer.

- Um, Bella--

Bella, I'm not saying

that this worked or anything, but could you please

step outside so I can say something to Sawyer?

- Take all the time you need.

Look, I'm sorry, bro.

You're my friend.

And football shouldn't get in the way of that.

- No, I'm sorry.

You just started playing receiver,

and you're already awesome at it.

I was just jealous.

- It's all good.

Hey, you're top drawer in my book, chap.

Likewise, governor.

- I knew this would work.

Oooh!

Happy to be of service, old governors.

-

Pheeeeeeh.

Uh!

Uh, I did it!

I'm buff.

I'm finally buff.

Wait, what do I do now?

Oh, oh.

No, no, no, no, no.

Ow!

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