Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,123 --> 00:00:06,580
(thunder rumbling) (screaming)
ARCHER: Goddamn it, Ray. Are you drunk?
2
00:00:06,700 --> 00:00:09,229
RAY: No, dumbass, are you?
ARCHER: No.
3
00:00:09,359 --> 00:00:12,261
LANA: Although not for lack of trying.
ARCHER: Exactly, that's my
4
00:00:12,406 --> 00:00:16,009
whole point. (retching)
CYRIL: Oh, how can you drink
5
00:00:16,158 --> 00:00:19,894
rum with all this turbulence?
ARCHER: Oh, my God! That's my whole point!
6
00:00:20,043 --> 00:00:23,979
MALORY: Enough already! My God,
are you people paid by the word?
7
00:00:24,129 --> 00:00:28,032
It's bad enough I'm packed into this
flying boxcar with you... (gasping)
8
00:00:28,181 --> 00:00:31,951
...without all this incessant bickering.
It's like I'm stuck on a school
9
00:00:32,100 --> 00:00:36,470
bus with the worst driver on the planet!
(Ray muttering)
10
00:00:36,622 --> 00:00:39,957
What was that? ARCHER: It is
kind of like a school bus.
11
00:00:40,105 --> 00:00:43,207
LANA: When have you ever been on a bus?
ARCHER: No, from the movies.
12
00:00:43,353 --> 00:00:46,522
We've got the whole Breakfast Club in here.
I'm Emilio Estevez.
13
00:00:46,669 --> 00:00:50,238
Cyril's obviously Anthony Michael Nerd.
Mother, you're Paul Gleason.
14
00:00:50,386 --> 00:00:55,357
Krieger's the loose cannon, Judd
Nelson, and Lana, you're... um...
15
00:00:55,510 --> 00:00:59,981
LANA: Wait, seriously? Molly Ringwald.
ALL: Eh...
16
00:01:00,132 --> 00:01:02,967
LANA: Oh, my God. MALORY: What
the hell are you talking about?
17
00:01:03,113 --> 00:01:06,148
ARCHER: Mother, hush. Lana, come on, if any
of you ISIS women is Molly Ringwald...
18
00:01:06,294 --> 00:01:09,263
CYRIL: It's obviously Cherlene.
KRIEGER: Totally.
19
00:01:09,410 --> 00:01:12,245
LANA: What? ARCHER: Yes, she's
the rich one, she's a redhead...
20
00:01:12,390 --> 00:01:15,759
LANA: So, what, you think I'm Ally Sheedy?
MALORY: Are you all just
21
00:01:15,907 --> 00:01:19,409
saying random words? CYRIL: Ally Sheedy
would've been way more likely to get
22
00:01:19,558 --> 00:01:22,426
pregnant in high school. KRIEGER:
Had there been a sequel.
23
00:01:22,572 --> 00:01:25,240
ARCHER: God forbid. KRIEGER: Right?
CYRIL: And as for who's the
24
00:01:25,384 --> 00:01:28,787
hot one... LANA: Wait, what, of us?
I'm the hot one!
25
00:01:28,935 --> 00:01:32,204
ALL: Eh... LANA: Oh, my God.
CHERLENE: Oh, get over
26
00:01:32,351 --> 00:01:35,219
yourself! (muttering) PAM: Shh!
Will you shut up?
27
00:01:35,366 --> 00:01:37,966
CHERLENE: Oh, please. She knows
we're in here. PAM: She will if you
28
00:01:37,977 --> 00:01:41,146
don't shut up. MALORY (sighs):
Pam, I know you're in there.
29
00:01:41,294 --> 00:01:45,931
PAM: No, we're not. But if we are, which
I don't admit to, which Breakfast
30
00:01:46,082 --> 00:01:50,319
Clubber am I? ARCHER: Hmm, I guess
the janitor everybody thinks is
31
00:01:50,470 --> 00:01:54,607
gross but turns out to be cool. PAM: Aw.
CHERLENE (laughs): I love
32
00:01:54,757 --> 00:01:59,294
that you take that as a compliment.
(farts)
33
00:02:25,644 --> 00:02:35,467
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
34
00:02:38,688 --> 00:02:42,591
PAM: So, can we get out of the crate now?
MALORY: No, but as it seems
35
00:02:42,740 --> 00:02:47,577
we've arrived at a pause in the idiocy, let's
recap the plan for when we land in San Marcos.
36
00:02:47,730 --> 00:02:51,433
LANA: Yeah, because I'm curious how we tell
Calder?n we turned six million dollars'
37
00:02:51,582 --> 00:02:55,085
worth of cocaine into one million
dollars' worth of weapons.
38
00:02:55,232 --> 00:02:58,134
MALORY: That's the CIA's problem.
Calder?n doesn't care.
39
00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:01,649
It's all gravy to him. ARCHER: Yeah, Lana.
I was actually wondering that
40
00:03:01,797 --> 00:03:05,133
myself. MALORY: All that matters
is that Calder?n pays us for this
41
00:03:05,280 --> 00:03:09,350
shipment. Then we use the profits to
buy more weapons, which we sell to
42
00:03:09,499 --> 00:03:13,569
him to make more profits to buy
more weapons. Blah, blah, blah.
43
00:03:13,719 --> 00:03:17,856
CYRIL (scoffs): Lana, for God's sakes,
it's Econ 101. MALORY: Cyril, don't be
44
00:03:18,006 --> 00:03:20,875
shitty. ARCHER: Yeah, Cyril!
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER: Tower
45
00:03:21,020 --> 00:03:24,623
to unidentified aircraft, you are now
entering restricted San Marcos airspace.
46
00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:28,508
Identify yourself. RAY: Uh, guys?
ARCHER: Just tell them Slater
47
00:03:28,657 --> 00:03:31,559
sent us. LANA: You think that's a
good idea, flying into a war zone,
48
00:03:31,704 --> 00:03:35,741
telling them we're with the CIA?
ARCHER: If Slater even was CIA.
49
00:03:35,891 --> 00:03:39,193
MALORY: Now, he's the one who teabagged
you? (Pam growls suggestively)
50
00:03:39,341 --> 00:03:42,209
ARCHER (scoffs): Beanbagged. MALORY:
Oh, whichever. ARCHER: It's a fairly
51
00:03:42,355 --> 00:03:45,390
important distinction. LANA: Sorry,
can I be a nag for a second?
52
00:03:45,537 --> 00:03:48,505
ARCHER: Oh, my God, Lana, I've
had only, like, eight drinks.
53
00:03:48,651 --> 00:03:51,720
LANA: Okay, not that, but wait, really?
ARCHER: Yeah, I've totally
54
00:03:51,866 --> 00:03:55,936
cut back, and not that it's any of your
beeswax, but I've also cut back on... you know.
55
00:03:56,086 --> 00:04:00,690
MALORY: On what? Sterling, with you,
that could almost literally be anything.
56
00:04:00,842 --> 00:04:04,045
ARCHER: Anonymous sex, if you must know.
MALORY: Ew!
57
00:04:04,191 --> 00:04:06,859
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER: Beechcraft,
please identify. RAY: Guys?
58
00:04:07,005 --> 00:04:09,873
LANA: Really? ARCHER: I've totally,
relatively cleaned up my act.
59
00:04:10,019 --> 00:04:13,888
So maybe keep that in mind when you're
choosing godparents. (Lana laughs)
60
00:04:14,038 --> 00:04:18,108
LANA: I will, Archer. I really will.
AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER:
61
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:20,793
Beechcraft, identify. RAY: Guys!
ARCHER: Goddamn it, tell him
62
00:04:20,937 --> 00:04:23,506
Slater sent us. LANA: Wait, wait,
wait, wait. RAY: Tower, this is
63
00:04:23,650 --> 00:04:26,719
Beechcraft. LANA: Ray!
RAY: Uh, Slater sent us?
64
00:04:26,865 --> 00:04:29,867
(groans) AIR TRAFFIC CONTROLLER:
Beechcraft, you are clear for
65
00:04:30,014 --> 00:04:33,183
landing. LANA: Thank you
for hearing my concerns.
66
00:04:33,329 --> 00:04:37,465
ARCHER: Jesus, will you relax?
(gulping)
67
00:04:37,616 --> 00:04:40,818
(belches) (groans) (sighs)
What's the worst that
68
00:04:40,965 --> 00:04:44,100
could happen? (tires squealing)
TROOPS: Get on the ground!
69
00:04:44,248 --> 00:04:47,250
(indistinct shouting) ARCHER: Don't shoot!
Don't shoot!
70
00:04:47,395 --> 00:04:50,631
(shouting continues) LANA: Way
to go, Gilligan. (gunshot)
71
00:04:50,778 --> 00:04:55,282
CALDER?N: Silencio! Who is in charge here?
COMANDANTE: Se?or Presidente,
72
00:04:55,433 --> 00:04:58,568
I... CALDER?N: Not you,
you baboon-faced baboon.
73
00:04:58,716 --> 00:05:02,719
I am obviously talking to these gringos, and also,
if I am here, then you are obviously not in
74
00:05:02,868 --> 00:05:06,004
charge. COMANDANTE: I...
(gunshots)
75
00:05:06,150 --> 00:05:11,722
(gun clicking) (gunshot)
CALDER?N: And to repeat,
76
00:05:11,878 --> 00:05:16,115
who is in charge here? ARCHER: That would
be... CALDER?N: Because they are to
77
00:05:16,265 --> 00:05:19,634
blame for this shipment of weapons being
late. ARCHER: Her, that older woman
78
00:05:19,782 --> 00:05:24,786
down there with the more or less permanent
scowl. MALORY: Se?or Presidente, it
79
00:05:24,939 --> 00:05:29,810
is such an honor to meet you. I'm
Malory Archer. CALDER?N: Wow.
80
00:05:29,963 --> 00:05:34,333
MALORY (chuckles): Well, thank you.
Anyhoo, hello?
81
00:05:34,485 --> 00:05:39,055
CALDER?N: So, the stories are true.
KRIEGER: What stories?
82
00:05:39,207 --> 00:05:42,209
I... no, not what, huh? Damn
it, man, I was sleepwalking.
83
00:05:42,355 --> 00:05:45,857
CALDER?N: Eh? (muttering in
agreement) KRIEGER: Hey, what's
84
00:05:46,006 --> 00:05:48,908
going on? CYRIL (sighs):
Maybe you're their god.
85
00:05:49,053 --> 00:05:51,888
(gasps) CALDER?N: Okay,
all but him, arrest.
86
00:05:52,034 --> 00:05:55,336
(indistinct talking) MALORY: Without
even checking the merchandise?
87
00:05:55,483 --> 00:05:59,486
(snapping) (groaning)
Although not that particular
88
00:05:59,637 --> 00:06:03,273
merchandise. (Pam and Cherlene
shouting) (guns clicking)
89
00:06:03,421 --> 00:06:07,558
(speaking Spanish)
(shouting) (gunshots)
90
00:06:10,656 --> 00:06:15,660
CHERLENE: Goddamn it! Who the hell drilled
my box?! ARCHER: So, we're just done
91
00:06:15,813 --> 00:06:18,982
with phrasing, right? That's
not a thing anymore? (gasps)
92
00:06:19,128 --> 00:06:21,997
I know, right? CALDER?N: Cherlene.
CHERLENE: What?!
93
00:06:22,143 --> 00:06:24,678
ALL: Wait, what?! ARCHER:
Yeah, seriously, what?
94
00:06:24,823 --> 00:06:28,392
CALDER?N: "Outlaw Country," "Hoochie Coochie
Coochie Man," "Travis County Limitado."
95
00:06:28,539 --> 00:06:32,609
I am... I am your biggest fan. Please,
we go to the presidential palace?
96
00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:35,762
PAM: I'm fine, too, by the way.
ARCHER: Oh, great.
97
00:06:35,908 --> 00:06:38,610
LANA: That's good. CALDER?N: Please, come,
come. Come, come, come, come, come.
98
00:06:38,755 --> 00:06:41,557
ARCHER: So, phrasing's just dead then?
LANA: What is your...?
99
00:06:41,702 --> 00:06:44,704
Wait, are you drunk? ARCHER
(scoffs): Please. Off 12 drinks?
100
00:06:44,850 --> 00:06:48,152
CALDER?N: Viva Cherlene! Viva Cherlene!
TROOPS (chanting): Cherlene!
101
00:06:48,300 --> 00:06:51,635
Cherlene!
LANA: Wait a minute, you said eight drinks!
102
00:06:51,783 --> 00:06:55,452
(chuckles) ARCHER: I lied.
I mean, yes, eight.
103
00:06:55,601 --> 00:06:58,035
TROOPS: Cherlene! Cherlene!
104
00:07:03,690 --> 00:07:08,594
PAM (laughing): Holy dickballs!
I mean, I mean, I mean, just
105
00:07:08,747 --> 00:07:11,616
holy....
LANA: Dickballs. Yes, Pam, I got it.
106
00:07:11,762 --> 00:07:14,897
CALDER?N: Are you sure? The room is okay?
CHERLENE: Yeah, it's fine, whatever.
107
00:07:15,044 --> 00:07:17,912
CALDER?N: I-I cannot believe
it is actually you.
108
00:07:18,058 --> 00:07:21,427
Here in my palace, I mean... CHERLENE:
Yeah, it's blowing your mind, huh?
109
00:07:21,574 --> 00:07:25,444
CALDER?N: Boom! (laughing): Yeah.
Can I please bring you anything?
110
00:07:25,593 --> 00:07:28,829
A freshly squeezed juice, a cocktail,
a sandwich of your own choosing?
111
00:07:28,976 --> 00:07:31,845
CHERLENE: Don't you, like,
have a war to go to? (scoffs)
112
00:07:31,990 --> 00:07:35,693
CALDER?N: It's in the mountains far, far
away where we will crush the communist rebel
113
00:07:35,842 --> 00:07:40,045
dogs! Especially now that we are
once again receiving weapons.
114
00:07:40,196 --> 00:07:44,633
MALORY: Yoo-hoo! And about that, I was
hoping that you and I could discuss
115
00:07:44,785 --> 00:07:49,021
our terms? CALDER?N: I... but Cherlene?
MALORY: Is exhausted.
116
00:07:49,172 --> 00:07:53,975
As is my drink. (sighs)
CYRIL: Why do we always have
117
00:07:54,129 --> 00:07:58,532
to share a room? RAY: The sinister gay
cabal, Cyril, you have fallen victim to
118
00:07:58,683 --> 00:08:01,918
the sinister gay cabal. CYRIL: Okay,
you know... RAY: I don't know why we
119
00:08:02,066 --> 00:08:06,636
always get stuck together. But I kind of
don't mind it. CYRIL: Hmm, actually I don't
120
00:08:06,788 --> 00:08:11,859
either, now that I think...
RAY: Queer! (laughs)
121
00:08:12,013 --> 00:08:17,617
(rhythmic zipping) (rhythmic
shaking) ARCHER:
Apache
122
00:08:17,774 --> 00:08:21,043
Helicopters We should sell
those 'Cause I'm a ropper.
123
00:08:21,189 --> 00:08:24,758
(laughs) Ropper...
Wow, that's awful.
124
00:08:24,907 --> 00:08:28,242
But so far, being an international
arms dealer is not.
125
00:08:28,390 --> 00:08:32,994
I could get extremely used to this.
Matt, Joel, hi, shut up.
126
00:08:33,146 --> 00:08:36,181
Let's set up lunch with Adnan
Khashoggi, I... (knocking)
127
00:08:36,328 --> 00:08:40,898
(door opens) Whoa, whoa, uh, uh, oh,
I ju... oh, ah, I just... (chuckles)
128
00:08:41,050 --> 00:08:46,821
I... oh, got a, I got a... whoa,
ho, ho, ho, oh, ho, ho, oh, no!
129
00:08:46,978 --> 00:08:49,080
(metal clanging)
130
00:08:53,676 --> 00:08:57,278
(clears throat) Uh, may I help you?
MAID: I'm sorry to bother
131
00:08:57,427 --> 00:09:01,230
you, sir. ARCHER: No, no, you didn't,
aren't, or rather you couldn't,
132
00:09:01,379 --> 00:09:06,350
or still haven't, I... MAID: I
thought you might need more towels.
133
00:09:06,503 --> 00:09:11,474
ARCHER: Oh, uh, no. I-I think
I'm okay for right now.
134
00:09:11,627 --> 00:09:15,063
(buttons popping) Although that being
said, it's better to be safe than
135
00:09:15,212 --> 00:09:19,215
sorry, at least with regards to towels.
(buttons popping)
136
00:09:19,364 --> 00:09:24,001
But only towels. KRIEGER:
Hey, are there more towels?
137
00:09:24,153 --> 00:09:28,257
Hey, are there more towels? Hey, are
there more...? CYRIL: You realize this
138
00:09:28,407 --> 00:09:31,309
isn't a hotel, right? LANA: And even if
it were, that is not how you'd go about
139
00:09:31,454 --> 00:09:35,691
getting towels! PAM: Who are you,
Princess... hang on... Lana?
140
00:09:35,842 --> 00:09:38,711
LANA: Well played. PAM: I've got crate lag.
LANA: And where are you
141
00:09:38,856 --> 00:09:41,725
going with that? PAM: Ice machine.
CIL: Ooh, hey, I could use
142
00:09:41,870 --> 00:09:44,739
some ice. KRIEGER: Oh, and if you see
a housekeeping cart, can you grab
143
00:09:44,884 --> 00:09:48,554
me some towels? PAM: Yep!
KRIEGER: You're not going to,
144
00:09:48,703 --> 00:09:51,705
are you? PAM: Nope!
KRIEGER: Goddamn it.
145
00:09:51,851 --> 00:09:55,653
Ha, hee, cold, cold, cold... LANA:
And there, but for the grace of...
146
00:09:55,803 --> 00:10:00,306
Hey, get me fizzy water!
(Pam farts, laughs) Thanks!
147
00:10:00,458 --> 00:10:04,194
MALORY: I'm sorry? CALDER?N: Tanks?
MALORY: For?
148
00:10:04,343 --> 00:10:08,847
CALDER?N: Hmm. Hmm...
Maybe to start?
149
00:10:08,998 --> 00:10:14,970
MALORY: I... defer to you? CALDER?N:
Then yes, I think to start.
150
00:10:15,127 --> 00:10:18,463
(cork pops) Yes? MALORY: Oh.
151
00:10:18,611 --> 00:10:23,615
Yes, please. CALDER?N: But
soon I think more, no?
152
00:10:23,768 --> 00:10:29,640
MALORY: Well, I should hope so.
Or is that not...?
153
00:10:29,797 --> 00:10:32,832
CALDER?N: No, please, of course, I
am willing to do whatever it takes.
154
00:10:32,979 --> 00:10:37,416
Anything. MALORY: Well,
then that makes two of us.
155
00:10:37,567 --> 00:10:43,739
CALDER?N: Wait, really? Anything?
MALORY: Yes?
156
00:10:45,236 --> 00:10:49,039
CALDER?N: Gas? MALORY: I'm sorry?
CALDER?N: You have gas?
157
00:10:49,188 --> 00:10:52,148
MALORY: Wha...? No! CALDER?N: Oh, my
God, oh, my God, oh, my God, sorry, I'm
158
00:10:52,169 --> 00:10:55,038
sorry, I'm sorry, I thought you...
MALORY: No! For the... No!
159
00:10:55,183 --> 00:10:58,085
CALDER?N: I misunderstood. I apologize.
MALORY: And well you should!
160
00:10:58,231 --> 00:11:01,100
CALDER?N: And well I do! Please forgive me.
MALORY: I mean...
161
00:11:01,245 --> 00:11:04,448
PAM: What a frickin' clip joint.
KRIEGER: No towels.
162
00:11:04,595 --> 00:11:08,131
PAM: No ice machine. (Cherlene
screams) CHERLENE: No towel machine?!
163
00:11:08,278 --> 00:11:11,180
PAM: Yeah, right? CHERLENE:
What is this-- Escape Fro..?
164
00:11:11,327 --> 00:11:14,195
Wait, are we still in New York, or...?
CYRIL: What?
165
00:11:14,341 --> 00:11:17,943
No, we're in Central America.
(gasps) CHERLENE: Oh, my God!
166
00:11:18,092 --> 00:11:21,828
We did it! We're free!
PAM: Do...?
167
00:11:21,976 --> 00:11:25,179
CHERLENE: Outlaw different
country woooooo!
168
00:11:27,235 --> 00:11:30,103
PAM: Sometimes I worry about her.
CYRIL: Eh.
169
00:11:30,249 --> 00:11:33,284
KRIEGER: Ooh, hang on, maybe this is it.
PAM: I don't know.
170
00:11:33,431 --> 00:11:36,700
It looks kind of... KRIEGER: Ugh, Pam,
they can't leave valuable towels and ice
171
00:11:36,847 --> 00:11:41,718
just lying around. Hotel
profit margins are very thin.
172
00:11:41,870 --> 00:11:48,109
(gasps) Oh, oh, oh...
(muffled yelling)
173
00:11:48,267 --> 00:11:52,971
(screams)
(all crying)
174
00:11:59,186 --> 00:12:03,356
Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. CYRIL:
Krieger? What'd you, see a ghost?
175
00:12:03,506 --> 00:12:06,408
PAM: Oh, my God, please say yes.
ARCHER: All right, is
176
00:12:06,554 --> 00:12:10,457
that happy hour I smell? CALDER?N:
Yes, Mr. Archer. Please join us.
177
00:12:10,607 --> 00:12:13,909
Your mother and I are drinking wine
that belonged to Benjamin Franklin.
178
00:12:14,056 --> 00:12:17,425
MALORY: We are? CALDER?N: And discussing
a shipment of four American tanks.
179
00:12:17,573 --> 00:12:21,576
MALORY: Oh, tanks! ARCHER: Thanks.
Tanks? MALORY: We do tanks!
180
00:12:21,725 --> 00:12:25,228
We can do anything, as long as you're
willing to pay. CALDER?N: Me... me pay?
181
00:12:25,376 --> 00:12:28,245
MALORY: Good, then it's settled.
ARCHER: If you say so,
182
00:12:28,390 --> 00:12:31,292
Mother. CALDER?N: No, no, no, I'm
sorry, I-I thought this was why
183
00:12:31,438 --> 00:12:35,941
the CIA was buying my cocaine. To sell to the
American black people, to make the money to buy
184
00:12:36,094 --> 00:12:39,496
the weapons to give me to fight
the comunistas. MALORY: Exactly.
185
00:12:39,644 --> 00:12:42,512
ARCHER: Wait, what? Why wouldn't they
just...? MALORY: Sterling, shut up
186
00:12:42,658 --> 00:12:45,693
and let me handle this. Because the
problem, Gustavo... CALDER?N: Ooh.
187
00:12:45,839 --> 00:12:48,741
MALORY: I'm sorry, may I call you Gustavo?
CALDER?N: No.
188
00:12:48,887 --> 00:12:54,959
MALORY: The problem, Se?or Presidente,
the problem, you see, the problem is...
189
00:12:55,117 --> 00:12:58,953
is the White House has lost faith
in your ability to win this war!
190
00:12:59,102 --> 00:13:02,022
CALDER?N: Ooh. MALORY: And so, if you
want any more weapons, you'll have to
191
00:13:02,117 --> 00:13:04,985
pay for them in cash. CALDER?N: Ooh!
MALORY: Starting now.
192
00:13:05,131 --> 00:13:08,066
CALDER?N: No, no, but I cannot afford
to do this! MALORY: Oh, please.
193
00:13:08,211 --> 00:13:11,480
Look at you, drinking Ben Franklin's
wine like it's Kool-Aid, surrounded by
194
00:13:11,628 --> 00:13:16,165
priceless art... Not this one obviously,
but... CALDER?N: Oh, no, this one
195
00:13:16,317 --> 00:13:19,353
cost 40 millions. MALORY AND ARCHER: What?!
CALDER?N: Yes, it is an Ivan
196
00:13:19,498 --> 00:13:23,334
Blitko. So we have, in this area,
these very geometric shapes, in these
197
00:13:23,484 --> 00:13:28,187
very bold colors here, and then the thick black
lines are coming here, always drawing the eye to
198
00:13:28,340 --> 00:13:32,610
here, and then, over everything... just
white. Just layer after layer after
199
00:13:32,761 --> 00:13:37,632
layer of pure white. Until you can
see nothing of the painting below.
200
00:13:37,785 --> 00:13:41,521
Not even with an infrared camera.
MALORY: So... what's the
201
00:13:41,670 --> 00:13:45,973
point? CALDER?N: The point? What
is the point of a beautiful
202
00:13:46,124 --> 00:13:51,436
woman? And speaking of!
JULIANA (chuckles): Hello, darling.
203
00:13:51,576 --> 00:13:56,187
CALDER?N: My wife.
(Archer grunting)
204
00:13:58,884 --> 00:14:02,754
(gulps)
(burps)
205
00:14:04,814 --> 00:14:09,384
MALORY: Sterling! Where are your manners?
ARCHER: Probably in my room,
206
00:14:09,536 --> 00:14:11,601
so I should go there right now and
find them. CALDER?N: No, no, no, no,
207
00:14:11,720 --> 00:14:17,427
no, please stay. Mi amor, may I present to you
Sterling Archer, and also his charming mother Malory.
208
00:14:17,569 --> 00:14:21,028
JULIANA: Juliana Calder?n.
MALORY: A pleasure to meet you, Juliana.
209
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,393
JULIANA: Oh.
MALORY: I'm sorry, may I call you...
210
00:14:23,522 --> 00:14:26,454
JULIANA: No. CALDER?N: Uh,
darling, how was your afternoon?
211
00:14:26,586 --> 00:14:29,426
JULIANA: Exhausting.
ARCHER: Mmm.
212
00:14:29,571 --> 00:14:33,708
JULIANA: So hot and sweaty. To
be honest, I'm ARCHER: Mmm.
213
00:14:33,858 --> 00:14:36,727
really quite sore.
CALDER?N: You see?
214
00:14:36,872 --> 00:14:40,341
This is why I disapprove. Juliana sometimes
goes among the servants, pretending to be a
215
00:14:40,489 --> 00:14:44,125
maid, or working in the laundry, even
one time helping to carry some rocks?
216
00:14:44,273 --> 00:14:47,475
MALORY: Oh, how... JULIANA:
Inspiring, really. MALORY: Mmm.
217
00:14:47,623 --> 00:14:50,543
CALDER?N: I was just showing them the
Blitko. JULIANA: Do you like what you
218
00:14:50,670 --> 00:14:55,340
see, Mr. Archer? ARCHER: You know,
so much that... I-I'm gonna go write
219
00:14:55,493 --> 00:15:02,199
about it in my art journal! CALDER?N: She
is going to bring us some tanks, so that we
220
00:15:02,359 --> 00:15:07,196
may crush the rebel dogs. Did
they tell you what is for dinner?
221
00:15:07,349 --> 00:15:10,851
CYRIL: Clones? KRIEGER: Yes, clones!
My God, it was like looking
222
00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:14,802
in... several mirrors! PAM: Oh,
man, oh, man, oh, man, oh, man...
223
00:15:14,952 --> 00:15:19,789
KRIEGER: Archer! ARCHER: What?!
KRIEGER: Ow, ah, hang on...
224
00:15:19,942 --> 00:15:23,411
gotta stitch... oh... ARCHER: Damn it, I
don't have time for... wait, Pam, did you
225
00:15:23,559 --> 00:15:27,696
find an ice machine? PAM: Huh-uh.
Ow, hang on... (groans)
226
00:15:27,846 --> 00:15:30,381
ARCHER: Goddamn it... PAM: Clones!
ARCHER: What?
227
00:15:30,525 --> 00:15:33,060
CYRIL: Krieger says-- ow, hold on...
ARCHER: Goddamn it!
228
00:15:33,205 --> 00:15:36,307
CYRIL: Krieger says he saw a bunch
of clones! ARCHER: Of what?
229
00:15:36,453 --> 00:15:38,921
KRIEGER: Of me! We're running to find them.
PAM: Wait, what?
230
00:15:39,066 --> 00:15:42,335
I thought we were running away from them!
ARCHER: Hang on, shut up,
231
00:15:42,481 --> 00:15:46,584
hold that thought. KRIEGER:
Guys, come on, let's go!
232
00:15:46,735 --> 00:15:49,437
PAM: Not without a bunch of garlic and
some wooden stakes. KRIEGER: What...?
233
00:15:49,582 --> 00:15:52,984
They're clones, not vampires! PAM:
It doesn't matter to the stake!
234
00:15:53,132 --> 00:15:55,800
KRIEGER: What're you... we can't kill them!
PAM: Well, not now.
235
00:15:55,946 --> 00:15:59,014
We wait till morning and then murder
them in their coffins. Cyril?
236
00:15:59,161 --> 00:16:02,396
Thoughts? CYRIL: I just really wish
I hadn't come on this stupid trip.
237
00:16:02,543 --> 00:16:09,849
But since I did... KRIEGER: Taaaaanks!
You jerks.
238
00:16:10,012 --> 00:16:11,879
(muffled scream)
239
00:16:14,734 --> 00:16:17,803
(muffled scream) (Lana sighs)
LANA: Don't even want to
240
00:16:17,950 --> 00:16:20,952
know. ARCHER: Lana! Lana!
241
00:16:21,097 --> 00:16:24,766
Oh, my God, you gotta help me! LANA: Oh,
for the... there is no ice machine!
242
00:16:24,916 --> 00:16:28,285
ARCHER: Okay, not that, but A) a palace
this big definitely has an ice machine,
243
00:16:28,432 --> 00:16:31,668
maybe not in the hall, but it's not
like they make ice with trays.
244
00:16:31,814 --> 00:16:34,216
B)... LANA: "B" is hey, shut up,
because I want to talk to you
245
00:16:34,360 --> 00:16:37,760
about that thing where you said you're cleaning
up your act. ARCHER: Which I'm actually
246
00:16:37,843 --> 00:16:41,780
pretty serious about, by the way, but right
now I want to talk about this other thing
247
00:16:41,929 --> 00:16:46,900
where I just banged Calder?n's wife.
Lana?
248
00:16:47,053 --> 00:16:51,023
LANA: Uh, hang on. Okay.
(clears throat)
249
00:16:51,173 --> 00:16:56,077
Why would you do that?! ARCHER: I...
I'm sorry, do you mean where?
250
00:16:56,230 --> 00:16:59,999
LANA: No, Archer, I mean why! What
happened to no more anonymous sex?
251
00:17:00,149 --> 00:17:03,017
ARCHER: It wasn't anonymous, Lana.
I thought she was the maid.
252
00:17:03,163 --> 00:17:06,198
LANA: Why would you think that?!
ARCHER: I'm sorry, do you
253
00:17:06,344 --> 00:17:09,814
mean why? LANA: Wh... Yes! Why?!
254
00:17:09,962 --> 00:17:13,331
ARCHER: Uniform, towels, the usual maid
stuff! LANA: The... whoa-whoa-whoa-
255
00:17:13,479 --> 00:17:16,747
whoa, back up. What is your
definition of anonymous sex?
256
00:17:16,894 --> 00:17:19,329
ARCHER: I don't know, bird masks?
LANA: What?
257
00:17:19,473 --> 00:17:22,008
ARCHER: Or a woman you literally
bump into on the train.
258
00:17:22,153 --> 00:17:25,421
Or the ferry. Or in a port-a-john
at the Preakness that time, but not
259
00:17:25,569 --> 00:17:28,571
somebody who works directly for a
president, I can tell you that.
260
00:17:28,716 --> 00:17:32,586
I mean, we're talking major security clearance,
so you got to assume there's a pretty
261
00:17:32,735 --> 00:17:38,574
thorough vetting process for... that...
you know... LANA: You done?
262
00:17:38,731 --> 00:17:42,534
ARCHER: Hang on. Yes?
LANA: Okay. So.
263
00:17:42,683 --> 00:17:49,856
Here's my advice. (grunts,
moans) Do with it as you will.
264
00:17:50,018 --> 00:17:57,491
(Archer moans, coughs) (groaning)
CHERLENE: Hey, are you going
265
00:17:57,653 --> 00:18:03,224
to this dinner? (retches)
Or did you already eat...
266
00:18:03,381 --> 00:18:07,617
crayons? JULIANA: Should
we not just start?
267
00:18:07,768 --> 00:18:10,636
(clears throat) CALDER?N: Not
until the guest of honor arrives.
268
00:18:10,782 --> 00:18:13,484
CHERLENE: Woooooo-hoo! (Calder?n
gasps) CALDER?N: Yes, yes, yes, yes,
269
00:18:13,629 --> 00:18:16,390
yes, yes, come, come, come, come,
come, come, because I am pulling out!
270
00:18:16,409 --> 00:18:19,744
CHERLENE: Phrasing, boom!
ARCHER: Thank you. (moans)
271
00:18:19,892 --> 00:18:22,493
LANA: How's the balls? ARCHER: Ruined?
I'm pretty sure?
272
00:18:22,638 --> 00:18:25,206
CALDER?N: Okay, you sit there.
Uh... you.
273
00:18:25,351 --> 00:18:28,187
Up. MALORY: I beg your pardon?
CALDER?N: Get up.
274
00:18:28,332 --> 00:18:31,652
Come on, move it, up, up, up! MALORY: Well,
of all the... CALDER?N: Please, Cherlene.
275
00:18:31,782 --> 00:18:37,220
Everyone, raise a glass, and join me to toast
Cherlene! Because-- and I happen to know
276
00:18:37,374 --> 00:18:42,745
this for a fact-- her debut album has
now officially sold one million copies!
277
00:18:42,901 --> 00:18:45,435
(Malory shrieks) (others
cheering) CYRIL: Yay!
278
00:18:45,580 --> 00:18:48,181
CHERLENE: How? It came out,
like, yesterday. CALDER?N: Yes!
279
00:18:48,326 --> 00:18:50,861
Amazing! A toast. CHERLENE:
No, like literally
280
00:18:51,005 --> 00:18:53,874
yesterday. CALDER?N: And
now it is platinum.
281
00:18:54,019 --> 00:18:57,455
A toast! CHERLENE: I just
don't see how it's possible.
282
00:18:57,604 --> 00:19:05,277
(forklift beeping) (many forklifts
beeping) CALDER?N: It doesn't matter
283
00:19:05,440 --> 00:19:08,275
how! A toast! PAM: Hear, hear!
284
00:19:08,421 --> 00:19:12,991
(murmurs of agreement) CALDER?N: And also
let us not forget my brave soldiers, yes,
285
00:19:13,144 --> 00:19:17,947
out there, fighting those rebel dogs,
far away! PAM: And plus that one right
286
00:19:18,100 --> 00:19:21,636
there. COMANDANTE: Se?or Presidente!
The rebels have broken through
287
00:19:21,784 --> 00:19:24,653
our lines!
They...
288
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:31,816
They are now within mortar range!
(screaming)
289
00:19:31,966 --> 00:19:34,834
CHERLENE: Oh, my God! It's starting!
MALORY: What is?
290
00:19:34,980 --> 00:19:39,784
CHERLENE: Cherlenemania! LANA: It's
a mortar attack! CHERLENE: I know!
291
00:19:39,937 --> 00:19:43,973
How frickin' outlaw country
is that?!
292
00:19:44,191 --> 00:19:46,058
I'll burn it down
293
00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:47,934
I'll burn it down to the ground
294
00:19:48,421 --> 00:19:54,849
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
295
00:19:54,899 --> 00:19:59,449
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
30040
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
