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1
00:00:03,588 --> 00:00:06,257
[SKYLIGHT CREAKS]
2
00:00:13,765 --> 00:00:15,058
Shh!
3
00:00:21,898 --> 00:00:23,608
Shh!
4
00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:30,657
[CELL PHONE PLAYING
HIP-HOP MUSIC]
5
00:00:30,823 --> 00:00:32,784
[GLASS SHATTERS]
6
00:00:32,951 --> 00:00:36,579
Ugh. Why the hell is your phone on?
- Because I have a social life.
7
00:00:36,746 --> 00:00:38,623
Hello?
- MALORY: Why the hell is your phone on?
8
00:00:38,790 --> 00:00:40,550
ARCHER:
Because I have a... Why did you call?
9
00:00:40,667 --> 00:00:43,253
Because this is important.
- LANA: Micromanagitis.
10
00:00:43,419 --> 00:00:46,548
MALORY: If we show San Marino
the flaws in their palace security...
11
00:00:46,714 --> 00:00:49,759
...they've agreed to hire us
as security consultants.
12
00:00:49,926 --> 00:00:51,928
And I'm sure I don't need to remind you...
13
00:00:52,095 --> 00:00:55,974
...that we haven't gotten one
of these jobs since your Uffizi fiasco.
14
00:00:56,140 --> 00:00:58,601
[ALARM BLARING]
15
00:00:58,768 --> 00:01:00,270
And yet, you always do.
16
00:01:00,436 --> 00:01:02,272
Because you learned nothing from it.
17
00:01:02,438 --> 00:01:05,233
ARCHER: I learned that flammable and
inflammable mean the same thing.
18
00:01:05,400 --> 00:01:07,485
Wait, what?
- Well, this time make sure you...
19
00:01:07,652 --> 00:01:11,239
Mother. Oh, my God, we've been
spotted they're shooting at us. Oh, my...
20
00:01:11,406 --> 00:01:12,574
[HEADSET BEEPS]
21
00:01:12,740 --> 00:01:15,326
Heh. Bet she's freaking out right now.
- Oh, my God.
22
00:01:15,660 --> 00:01:18,955
What shade is that? Crack Whore Red?
23
00:01:19,122 --> 00:01:22,750
You said they were tranquilizer darts.
- Ah, I merely implied that.
24
00:01:22,917 --> 00:01:25,753
Damn it. So I poisoned like,
five innocent security guards?
25
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:29,340
Would you relax? I'm pretty sure
San Marino has universal health care.
26
00:01:29,507 --> 00:01:31,134
So?
- So that's good for them.
27
00:01:31,301 --> 00:01:33,094
Because there's gonna be
some neurological damage.
28
00:01:33,261 --> 00:01:34,596
[LANA GROANS]
29
00:01:34,762 --> 00:01:39,601
Oh, my. Lana.
- Wow, that is one serious diamond.
30
00:01:39,767 --> 00:01:41,728
PAM:
But is it supposed to be brown?
31
00:01:41,894 --> 00:01:43,980
It's not brown, Pam.
32
00:01:44,147 --> 00:01:47,191
That color is called champagne.
- Mm-hm.
33
00:01:47,358 --> 00:01:50,111
And why do you have it?
- Because I...
34
00:01:50,278 --> 00:01:52,697
[WHISPERS]
...am gonna ask Lana to marry me.
35
00:01:52,864 --> 00:01:54,949
And you're gonna give her that
if she says no?
36
00:01:55,116 --> 00:02:00,163
Like a big "screw you
in your big Lincoln-Leggy fingers"?
37
00:02:00,872 --> 00:02:01,956
[BURPS]
38
00:02:33,821 --> 00:02:37,408
ARCHER: The last thing you hear me say is,
"Oh, my God, they're shooting at us"...
39
00:02:37,575 --> 00:02:39,661
...and you don't even call me back?
- Well...
40
00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:41,829
...I knew you weren't in any real danger.
41
00:02:41,996 --> 00:02:43,081
You know, with Lana there.
42
00:02:43,247 --> 00:02:44,707
Ha!
- Ha.
43
00:02:44,874 --> 00:02:46,751
And let's just knock off the giggling.
44
00:02:46,918 --> 00:02:51,547
I want game-faces on those heads
for our conference call with the prince.
45
00:02:51,714 --> 00:02:54,592
I thought he was a captain regent.
- Oh, whatever.
46
00:02:54,759 --> 00:02:57,095
All of San Marino could fit
in the South Bronx.
47
00:02:57,261 --> 00:03:01,933
The important thing is, they're loaded.
- Just shitfaced.
48
00:03:02,100 --> 00:03:03,768
Oh...
- About 15 freaking beers...
49
00:03:03,935 --> 00:03:08,356
...all that Sch?tzie. And holy shit,
did I honk down a bunch of absinthe?
50
00:03:08,523 --> 00:03:11,025
I don't know Pam,
but could you lower your voice?
51
00:03:11,192 --> 00:03:16,030
I must have. Cause I hallucinated
you had an engagement...
52
00:03:16,197 --> 00:03:18,825
[WHISPERS]
Not. Another. Word.
53
00:03:18,991 --> 00:03:22,829
And just what is this, I ask you?
- Hello, Cheryl.
54
00:03:22,995 --> 00:03:25,081
Cyril. Are you
cheating on me?
55
00:03:25,248 --> 00:03:28,668
No, just trying to get my muffin back.
- Oh, no, you're not.
56
00:03:28,835 --> 00:03:30,169
I'm not?
- Not like that.
57
00:03:30,336 --> 00:03:33,297
You gotta slug her in the
diaphragm with a forearm shiver.
58
00:03:33,464 --> 00:03:35,925
Oh. That's good to know. Heh.
- Do it.
59
00:03:36,092 --> 00:03:37,885
Um...
60
00:03:38,052 --> 00:03:40,304
[PAM GRUNTS THEN VOMITS]
61
00:03:40,471 --> 00:03:41,931
Wow.
- Ugh.
62
00:03:42,098 --> 00:03:45,977
And no muffin. See?
Time lost is muffin lost.
63
00:03:46,144 --> 00:03:47,937
Along with my appetite.
64
00:03:48,104 --> 00:03:51,691
For food, that is. Heh-heh.
- Ugh.
65
00:03:51,858 --> 00:03:53,317
Come see me.
66
00:03:53,484 --> 00:03:56,946
Wow. I am incredibly sorry.
67
00:03:57,113 --> 00:03:59,073
But that is my decision, Ms. Archer.
68
00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:03,077
And as captain regent of...
- I don't care if you're Captain...
69
00:04:03,244 --> 00:04:04,662
Crunch. No, wait, Beefheart.
70
00:04:04,829 --> 00:04:06,748
We had a deal.
- Kangaroo. Remember him?
71
00:04:06,914 --> 00:04:10,001
We pointed out every single flaw
in your cut-rate security system.
72
00:04:10,168 --> 00:04:12,837
And now not only
are you hiring another agency...
73
00:04:13,004 --> 00:04:14,338
...you won't even pay ISIS...
74
00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:17,300
...for that security probe.
- LANA: Which means no bonuses for us.
75
00:04:17,467 --> 00:04:19,594
Wait, what?
- Oh, now he cares.
76
00:04:19,761 --> 00:04:23,181
Those monies will go to medical care
for the palace guards they poisoned.
77
00:04:23,347 --> 00:04:24,640
What?
- Lana did that.
78
00:04:24,807 --> 00:04:26,893
And as for hiring ODIN...
- ODIN?
79
00:04:27,059 --> 00:04:30,855
Uh, skipper, if I could jump in here.
- Trexler.
80
00:04:31,022 --> 00:04:34,525
Oh, Malory. Even on...
What is this, 1080p?
81
00:04:34,692 --> 00:04:36,944
You look just as supple...
82
00:04:37,111 --> 00:04:40,364
...and sexy as the day
I first laid eyes on you.
83
00:04:40,531 --> 00:04:42,241
Where, in a wax museum?
- Sterling!
84
00:04:42,408 --> 00:04:46,120
That's no way to talk to your mother.
- Just who the hell do you think you are?
85
00:04:46,287 --> 00:04:49,791
Getting ISIS blacklisted at the UN?
- Had nothing to do with that.
86
00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:52,877
Embarrassing me in Berlin?
- The entire hotel was embarrassed.
87
00:04:53,044 --> 00:04:55,004
Stealing all my
prospective clients?
88
00:04:55,171 --> 00:04:57,048
Yeah.
- And no matter which way I turn...
89
00:04:57,215 --> 00:05:00,635
...you're butting in that big, fat, strong...
90
00:05:00,802 --> 00:05:03,221
...aquiline nose of yours.
- Wait, what?
91
00:05:03,387 --> 00:05:06,557
You said it was the nose of a Caesar.
- Ehh...
92
00:05:06,724 --> 00:05:08,476
Well, perhaps a lesser Caesar.
93
00:05:08,643 --> 00:05:11,729
No, no, now, I clearly
remember you said Augustus.
94
00:05:11,896 --> 00:05:16,859
And in vino veritas.
- The Chianti was definitely flowing.
95
00:05:17,026 --> 00:05:18,736
Ha, ha.
- Among other things.
96
00:05:18,903 --> 00:05:20,530
Mother.
- Hmm? Oh, uh...
97
00:05:20,696 --> 00:05:24,200
...this is the last time
you make me out a fool, Len Trexler.
98
00:05:24,367 --> 00:05:26,410
You wanna play me hard?
- Phrasing.
99
00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:28,663
You know I do.
- Well, then you better nut up.
100
00:05:28,830 --> 00:05:31,040
Phrasing.
- Because I've swallowed just about...
101
00:05:31,207 --> 00:05:33,751
...as much as I can take from you.
- Hey! Phrasing!
102
00:05:33,918 --> 00:05:35,419
And we'll see who's smirking...
103
00:05:35,586 --> 00:05:38,464
...when ISIS steals that diamond for real.
104
00:05:38,631 --> 00:05:41,259
Oh, you're a naughty girl.
- Right, then.
105
00:05:41,425 --> 00:05:45,555
Commence Operation
"Rub Len Trexler's Big Fat Nose In It."
106
00:05:45,721 --> 00:05:49,100
Sounds like you already have.
- You want to break back into the palace...
107
00:05:49,267 --> 00:05:52,103
...which now has the insane
amount of security we recommended?
108
00:05:52,270 --> 00:05:55,773
Plus God knows how many ODIN guys.
- Yes, so take more of that poison.
109
00:05:55,940 --> 00:05:57,441
And on top of that suck-salad...
110
00:05:57,608 --> 00:06:01,279
...you wanna sprinkle on the bacon bits
of "Let's tell them we're coming"?
111
00:06:02,113 --> 00:06:03,990
Well?
- Well, there's this new thing...
112
00:06:04,156 --> 00:06:05,783
...called the element of surprise?
113
00:06:05,950 --> 00:06:09,287
I'm so sorry I slammed you in the gut.
Jeez, that's how Houdini died.
114
00:06:09,453 --> 00:06:11,247
Houdini died of AIDS.
- No.
115
00:06:11,414 --> 00:06:13,958
Why do you always say that?
And that's the thing.
116
00:06:14,125 --> 00:06:16,335
I want to surprise Lana...
- Well, you nailed it.
117
00:06:16,502 --> 00:06:19,130
So this time I need you
to not be your normal...
118
00:06:19,297 --> 00:06:20,923
...compulsively blabby self.
119
00:06:21,090 --> 00:06:23,426
Wha...? When have I ever been blabby?
120
00:06:23,593 --> 00:06:24,927
[SOBBING]
121
00:06:25,094 --> 00:06:27,430
Guess who has breast cancer.
122
00:06:27,597 --> 00:06:28,806
[SOBBING]
123
00:06:28,973 --> 00:06:32,977
Just one of like, two dozen equally
appalling videos on your website.
124
00:06:33,144 --> 00:06:35,146
They're not all equally appal...
125
00:06:35,313 --> 00:06:38,649
And have I blabbed about you and Cheryl?
- She keeps seducing me.
126
00:06:38,816 --> 00:06:42,820
And you think you can make that unhappen
if you give Lana a tiny flake of brown mica?
127
00:06:42,987 --> 00:06:46,073
Cyril, look at it.
- But I spent two months' salary.
128
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:50,077
I know. But you make shit.
- Hey, I'm doing pretty well, thank you.
129
00:06:50,244 --> 00:06:53,581
Save that speech for the father
you continually disappoint.
130
00:06:53,748 --> 00:06:55,833
I'm head of HR, Cyril,
I know your take-home.
131
00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:58,419
Yeah, and I... I...
132
00:06:58,586 --> 00:06:59,921
I take home shit.
133
00:07:00,087 --> 00:07:01,339
Well, we all do.
134
00:07:01,505 --> 00:07:03,466
What's my father ever done
that's so great?
135
00:07:03,633 --> 00:07:05,927
School superintendent? Big whoop.
136
00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:09,013
There's only like 800 kids
in the entire county.
137
00:07:09,180 --> 00:07:11,265
K through 12!
138
00:07:11,891 --> 00:07:13,893
Wow.
- I'm sorry, you were saying?
139
00:07:14,060 --> 00:07:18,397
I were saying, we all make shit, so,
what we should do is unionize.
140
00:07:18,564 --> 00:07:20,858
Yeah. I'll get the raise I deserve.
141
00:07:21,025 --> 00:07:24,528
Then you can buy Lana a big-boy ring.
- She'll promptly agree to marry me.
142
00:07:24,695 --> 00:07:26,864
Then you take her home
to meet your dick dad.
143
00:07:27,031 --> 00:07:29,992
And then I shove his hawk face
right into her big brown boobs...
144
00:07:30,159 --> 00:07:32,495
...and scream,
"Look at those babies, old man.
145
00:07:32,662 --> 00:07:35,289
Didn't need a varsity letter
to get those, did I?
146
00:07:35,456 --> 00:07:39,126
So now who's a disappoint...?"
Oh, Jesus H. Jones, Pam.
147
00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:42,338
What?
148
00:07:44,757 --> 00:07:47,218
MALORY:
Carol? Carol?
149
00:07:47,385 --> 00:07:50,846
Oh, wait. Cheryl? Cheryl.
150
00:07:51,013 --> 00:07:52,390
Hello?
151
00:07:52,556 --> 00:07:54,183
Cheryl, I swear to God...
152
00:07:54,350 --> 00:07:58,646
...if I have to open my own
salad again I will freak out.
153
00:07:58,813 --> 00:08:01,065
Where the hell is everybody?
154
00:08:01,232 --> 00:08:04,318
Let's assume we can't access
the palace through that same skylight.
155
00:08:04,485 --> 00:08:06,821
Okay.
- But maybe we overlooked an air shaft...
156
00:08:06,988 --> 00:08:08,864
...or maybe even
some access below-grade?
157
00:08:09,031 --> 00:08:11,909
So let's pull up the palace schematics.
- Uh, okay.
158
00:08:12,076 --> 00:08:14,745
Maybe today, if that works for you.
- Hang on.
159
00:08:14,912 --> 00:08:17,373
Let me see. How about now? Anything?
- No.
160
00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:19,125
Uh, how about now?
- No.
161
00:08:19,291 --> 00:08:20,668
How about now? Anything?
- No.
162
00:08:20,835 --> 00:08:22,712
What are you doing there?
- I don't know.
163
00:08:22,878 --> 00:08:25,159
What, are you just hitting random keys?
- Well, obviously.
164
00:08:25,297 --> 00:08:28,092
Aw, damn it, we...
Where is the hobbit guy?
165
00:08:28,259 --> 00:08:30,886
Heh. A freaking hobbit works here?
- No. He's just a...
166
00:08:31,053 --> 00:08:33,514
They're called little people, not hobbits.
167
00:08:33,681 --> 00:08:35,725
Will you... He's a hobbit enthusiast.
- Ooh.
168
00:08:35,891 --> 00:08:39,228
But he also knows how to work
all the computers and satellites and shit.
169
00:08:39,395 --> 00:08:41,230
But even though I do all that...
170
00:08:41,397 --> 00:08:43,607
...I gotta live with a roommate.
In Queens.
171
00:08:43,774 --> 00:08:46,694
MAN: That's disgusting.
- Thanks, Bilbo. Another example...
172
00:08:46,861 --> 00:08:49,739
...of how underpaid the ISIS
support staff really is.
173
00:08:49,905 --> 00:08:51,282
And I for one am fed up.
174
00:08:51,449 --> 00:08:53,451
Yeah, fed full
of muffins and denial.
175
00:08:53,617 --> 00:08:55,619
What's your problem, neck bones?
176
00:08:55,786 --> 00:08:59,123
My problem is I remember what
Ms. Archer did to the cleaning ladies.
177
00:08:59,290 --> 00:09:02,418
You sure, missus? ls plenty space.
178
00:09:02,585 --> 00:09:04,378
No. Gracias.
179
00:09:04,545 --> 00:09:06,797
Okay.
180
00:09:07,882 --> 00:09:10,384
[ELEVATOR THUDS
THEN WOMEN SCREAM]
181
00:09:10,551 --> 00:09:12,261
[ELEVATOR CRASHES]
182
00:09:12,428 --> 00:09:14,638
Ha. How's that for bread and roses?
183
00:09:14,805 --> 00:09:16,223
[ALL CHATTERING]
184
00:09:16,390 --> 00:09:17,475
That was pretty sad.
185
00:09:17,641 --> 00:09:20,644
What's sad is now nobody re-stocks
the machine in the bathroom...
186
00:09:20,811 --> 00:09:22,563
...so I have to make my own tampons.
187
00:09:22,730 --> 00:09:25,491
MAN: I don't know what that is.
- WOMAN: That's where my yarn's going.
188
00:09:25,649 --> 00:09:28,903
Exactly, and so I say, no union.
189
00:09:29,070 --> 00:09:30,654
MAN:
Yes, confederacy forever.
190
00:09:30,821 --> 00:09:34,408
No, wait, uh-uh. Don't listen to
the makes-her-own-tampons person.
191
00:09:34,575 --> 00:09:36,994
Listen to your hearts.
Because deep down...
192
00:09:37,161 --> 00:09:39,080
...you know they're exploiting us.
193
00:09:39,246 --> 00:09:42,333
But if we unite, we can put a stop to it.
194
00:09:42,500 --> 00:09:45,586
And that supply closet
is just packed with posterboard...
195
00:09:45,753 --> 00:09:48,506
...and markers,
and maybe even some glitter.
196
00:09:48,672 --> 00:09:50,591
So who's with me on that picket line?
197
00:09:50,758 --> 00:09:53,094
[ALL SHOUTING]
198
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:55,513
And me.
- Really?
199
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:57,765
You had me at "put."
200
00:09:57,932 --> 00:10:00,267
LANA:
Yes, we need a sound sensor. Duh!
201
00:10:00,893 --> 00:10:03,813
Where is that equipment guy?
And where the hell are the jumars?
202
00:10:03,979 --> 00:10:06,190
Yeah, I don't know,
this was all I could find.
203
00:10:06,357 --> 00:10:08,359
I'm thinking goggles, yes. Shovels...
204
00:10:08,526 --> 00:10:10,126
...I don't know how
or why we'd use them.
205
00:10:10,152 --> 00:10:11,862
Ugh.
- MALORY: Cheryl?
206
00:10:12,029 --> 00:10:14,865
She's not in here.
- Well, why are you in here?
207
00:10:15,032 --> 00:10:17,368
Is the San Marino diamond in here now?
208
00:10:17,535 --> 00:10:18,869
It might be, for all we know.
209
00:10:19,036 --> 00:10:20,704
We can't find any gear we need.
210
00:10:20,871 --> 00:10:23,290
We've got no sat-coms, no new Intel...
211
00:10:23,457 --> 00:10:26,710
...and so basically we are totally
unprepared for this mission.
212
00:10:26,877 --> 00:10:30,381
Unless it involves night-shoveling.
- Well, I want that diamond.
213
00:10:30,548 --> 00:10:35,052
Not to mention my rapidly-approaching-
room-temperature Cobb salad, so...
214
00:10:35,219 --> 00:10:37,429
Damn it, where the hell are all the drones?
215
00:10:37,596 --> 00:10:39,849
MAN: [CHANTING]: What do we want?
- ALL: Unfair!
216
00:10:40,015 --> 00:10:41,892
MAN: When do we want it?
- ALL: Change!
217
00:10:42,059 --> 00:10:45,646
Okay, so they're bad chanters,
but overall this strike's shaping up.
218
00:10:45,813 --> 00:10:50,151
How'? Nobody knows why we're striking.
- Well, we can't say "Hey, right upstairs...
219
00:10:50,317 --> 00:10:52,194
...is a top-secret intelligence agency."
220
00:10:52,361 --> 00:10:54,530
But it looks like we're
picketing the cleaners.
221
00:10:54,697 --> 00:10:56,323
No, it doesn't.
- Jesus!
222
00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:58,784
MAN:
Stop picketing the cleaners!
223
00:10:58,951 --> 00:11:00,369
You were saying?
224
00:11:00,536 --> 00:11:03,998
Why are people picketing the cleaners?
- I predicted this. It's curry fury.
225
00:11:04,165 --> 00:11:05,749
Holy shit, is that Cyril?
226
00:11:05,916 --> 00:11:09,211
ARCHER:
And Pam, Krieger, Carol. All the...
227
00:11:09,378 --> 00:11:12,923
Drones. They're not picketing
the cleaners, they're picketing ISIS.
228
00:11:13,090 --> 00:11:16,552
What's their beef?
- Oh, the same entitled crap as always.
229
00:11:16,719 --> 00:11:19,555
"I can't make ends meet,"
"I'm on food stamps."
230
00:11:19,722 --> 00:11:22,933
"My child died because I couldn't
afford new bone marrow."
231
00:11:23,100 --> 00:11:25,686
Just me, me, me.
- Jesus, whose kid died?
232
00:11:25,853 --> 00:11:28,105
Oh, who remembers.
Check Pam's blog.
233
00:11:28,272 --> 00:11:31,609
And done, but if you still want us
to steal you that gigantic diamond...
234
00:11:31,775 --> 00:11:35,112
Well, obviously.
- We're gonna have to cross their picket line.
235
00:11:35,279 --> 00:11:36,447
[CROWD SHOUTING]
236
00:11:36,614 --> 00:11:38,699
Screw that.
- Yeah, what's with all the bottles?
237
00:11:38,866 --> 00:11:40,868
It's like a trailer park Easter.
238
00:11:41,035 --> 00:11:43,954
MAN:
Lousy commies! Go back to Quebec!
239
00:11:44,121 --> 00:11:46,749
Jesus. Okay,
strike's over, everybody.
240
00:11:46,916 --> 00:11:49,627
No, hold that line. We deserve a raise...
241
00:11:49,793 --> 00:11:52,796
...and Lana deserves a real ring, so...
242
00:11:52,963 --> 00:11:54,203
Okay, so let's go out the back.
243
00:11:54,340 --> 00:11:55,341
[DOOR OPENS]
244
00:11:55,507 --> 00:11:57,134
Oh, my God.
- Ha, ha!
245
00:11:57,301 --> 00:11:59,470
Happy Easter, Cyril.
- Lana?
246
00:11:59,637 --> 00:12:01,931
Oh, baby. What happened to you?
247
00:12:02,097 --> 00:12:04,642
Well, see, I wanted to buy you a...
- Cyril.
248
00:12:04,808 --> 00:12:08,020
This is not that moment.
- And we don't talk to management.
249
00:12:08,187 --> 00:12:10,314
Or ham-flaked whores.
- What?
250
00:12:10,481 --> 00:12:11,815
Hmm?
- Yeah, no, they're right.
251
00:12:11,982 --> 00:12:14,818
What?
- No, not the whore part. Management.
252
00:12:14,985 --> 00:12:16,487
We're not technically management.
253
00:12:16,654 --> 00:12:18,656
But you make
shitloads more than we do.
254
00:12:18,822 --> 00:12:20,824
Even though you totally depend on us.
255
00:12:20,991 --> 00:12:25,162
On you? Hey, we're out
there risking our lives every...
256
00:12:25,329 --> 00:12:28,666
Many of the days.
- And so, yes, we get paid a little more.
257
00:12:28,832 --> 00:12:31,126
How much a little more?
- Well, it's complicated.
258
00:12:31,293 --> 00:12:33,796
No, it isn't, don't answer that.
- What with salary...
259
00:12:33,963 --> 00:12:35,798
...performance incentives, bonuses...
260
00:12:35,965 --> 00:12:37,800
Bonuses?
- Dump her, Cyril.
261
00:12:37,967 --> 00:12:40,010
Hey, crazy. Go macrame some tampons.
262
00:12:40,177 --> 00:12:42,680
Oh, you wanna hear
something crazy? Cyril...
263
00:12:42,846 --> 00:12:45,849
Thank you, Pam. Now look, Lana...
- Baby, "Take Charge" Cyril...
264
00:12:46,016 --> 00:12:49,853
...is totally doing it for me, it really is,
but we're on a vital mission here.
265
00:12:50,020 --> 00:12:52,856
Vital mission?
- Not on the master clipboard.
266
00:12:53,023 --> 00:12:55,693
So just how vital is it?
- MALORY: It's incredibly vital.
267
00:12:55,859 --> 00:12:58,529
Because if they don't
steal me that huge diamond...
268
00:12:58,696 --> 00:13:01,490
...I will literally die.
- A diamond?
269
00:13:01,657 --> 00:13:04,994
In this economy?
- You're stealing a diamond? For her?
270
00:13:05,160 --> 00:13:07,746
Oh, irony.
- And the rest of you, back to work.
271
00:13:07,913 --> 00:13:09,707
If that salad isn't open in the next...
272
00:13:09,873 --> 00:13:12,376
Get them!
- Oh, oh!
273
00:13:12,543 --> 00:13:14,044
Hey, whoa.
- Stop surging.
274
00:13:14,211 --> 00:13:15,379
Archer, do something.
275
00:13:15,546 --> 00:13:17,881
I am doing something.
What are you doing?
276
00:13:18,048 --> 00:13:19,591
[ALL COUGHING]
277
00:13:19,758 --> 00:13:21,593
ARCHER:
Lana, out the back. Move.
278
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:23,262
Hey, Cyril.
279
00:13:23,429 --> 00:13:24,888
Cyril.
280
00:13:25,055 --> 00:13:26,307
Cyril!
- CYRIL: What?
281
00:13:26,473 --> 00:13:31,145
ARCHER: I'm saving Lana. As usual.
- CYRIL: Hey, shut up.
282
00:13:36,150 --> 00:13:38,990
ARCHER: Freaking ODIN. I can't believe this.
- LANA: How many are there?
283
00:13:39,069 --> 00:13:40,487
ARCHER: About a jillion.
- LANA: Damn it.
284
00:13:40,654 --> 00:13:42,948
A jillion gay little copycats.
- What?
285
00:13:43,115 --> 00:13:45,159
I didn't invent the turtleneck, Lana.
286
00:13:45,326 --> 00:13:48,746
But I was the first to recognize
its potential as a tactical garment.
287
00:13:48,912 --> 00:13:50,789
The tactical turtleneck, Lana.
- Archer.
288
00:13:50,956 --> 00:13:52,416
The Tactleneck.
289
00:13:52,583 --> 00:13:54,585
Can you please focus?
- Not really.
290
00:13:54,752 --> 00:13:57,171
Don't think these goggles
were properly calibrated.
291
00:13:57,338 --> 00:14:00,424
Ditto the sound sensor.
And the stupid code-cloner.
292
00:14:00,591 --> 00:14:03,344
All the gear those sweaty
tech-dweebs normally... Oh!
293
00:14:03,510 --> 00:14:07,014
Do we take the drones for granted?
- No. No, no, Lana.
294
00:14:07,181 --> 00:14:08,932
Do not make this about them.
295
00:14:09,099 --> 00:14:12,561
MALORY:
No, no, no. That is utterly unacceptable.
296
00:14:12,728 --> 00:14:16,231
It's just a cost-of-living adjustment.
- MALORY: It's strong-arm robbery.
297
00:14:16,398 --> 00:14:19,234
Come on, Ms. Archer.
You've been in there ten hours.
298
00:14:19,401 --> 00:14:21,945
Meet us halfway,
and Krieger will let you out of there.
299
00:14:22,112 --> 00:14:25,240
Or else he'll crank up the heat again.
- CHERYL: I love...
300
00:14:25,407 --> 00:14:28,952
...that you know how to do that.
- And I love that I have an erection...
301
00:14:29,119 --> 00:14:30,996
...that didn't involve homeless people.
302
00:14:31,163 --> 00:14:34,541
And you're cool with Krieger
shucking your side-corn?
303
00:14:34,708 --> 00:14:36,752
Yeah, that is a huge win-win for me.
304
00:14:36,919 --> 00:14:38,295
You hear that, Ms. Archer?
305
00:14:38,462 --> 00:14:41,298
We're all on board
for the big win-win out here.
306
00:14:41,465 --> 00:14:43,926
MALORY:
Well, I'm not. Do your worst, Krieger.
307
00:14:44,093 --> 00:14:46,470
Okay.
- Oh, my God, yes.
308
00:14:46,637 --> 00:14:48,764
MALORY:
Yes, go ahead. Crank up the heat.
309
00:14:48,931 --> 00:14:51,100
I'm as naked as the day I was born.
310
00:14:51,266 --> 00:14:52,267
[ALL GROAN]
311
00:14:52,434 --> 00:14:54,354
KRIEGER: Oh, yes.
- MAN: That is not something...
312
00:14:54,436 --> 00:14:56,438
Naked or not.
- Well, don't keep saying it.
313
00:14:56,605 --> 00:14:58,816
You can't stay in there forever.
314
00:14:58,982 --> 00:15:02,778
MALORY: Ha! I'll outlast you.
I'm naked and I've got half a lime...
315
00:15:02,945 --> 00:15:04,113
...and almost...
316
00:15:04,279 --> 00:15:05,322
[LIQUID SLOSHES]
317
00:15:05,489 --> 00:15:07,491
...nearly two-thirds of a half-gallon of...
318
00:15:07,658 --> 00:15:09,576
[GLASS SHATTERS]
319
00:15:09,743 --> 00:15:11,620
MALORY: Shit.
- Now we got her.
320
00:15:11,787 --> 00:15:14,873
MALORY: Ha! I'll suck it straight
off this grimy linoleum...
321
00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:16,959
...before I give in to you belly-achers.
322
00:15:17,126 --> 00:15:21,505
You've got nothing!
- No code-cloner, no GPS. Argh!
323
00:15:21,672 --> 00:15:23,757
We've got no thermal imaging.
- Lana...
324
00:15:23,924 --> 00:15:25,509
...we don't need gadgets.
- Really?
325
00:15:25,676 --> 00:15:28,846
Machines are gonna fail.
Then the system's gonna fail...
326
00:15:29,012 --> 00:15:31,765
...and then it's
"Who has the ability to survive?"
327
00:15:31,932 --> 00:15:35,102
And that's the game, Lana.
Survival.
328
00:15:36,019 --> 00:15:37,771
Just watched
Deliverance again, huh?
329
00:15:37,938 --> 00:15:40,441
I mean, is Burt Reynolds
not the man in that?
330
00:15:40,607 --> 00:15:44,361
On the raft? With the vest?
331
00:15:45,028 --> 00:15:47,698
Huh? You know he did all his own stunts.
- I know!
332
00:15:47,865 --> 00:15:49,616
Shh!
- He did his own stunts!
333
00:15:49,783 --> 00:15:51,785
ARCHER:
Keep your freaking voice... Aah!
334
00:15:51,952 --> 00:15:54,705
God! Sweet Jesus, the goggles!
335
00:15:54,872 --> 00:15:56,331
Intruders. Get them.
336
00:15:56,498 --> 00:15:57,541
[ALARM BLARING]
337
00:15:57,708 --> 00:16:01,837
Aah, Lana! Lana, I'm blind. I'm blind.
- Yeah? Should I go on without you?
338
00:16:02,004 --> 00:16:05,215
What? No, carry me,
monster-hands.
339
00:16:09,386 --> 00:16:11,305
Ow, ow, ow!
340
00:16:11,472 --> 00:16:13,223
Jesus. Quit bouncing my eyes.
341
00:16:13,390 --> 00:16:16,560
Shut up. I'm trying to get us
an evac but nobody's answer...
342
00:16:16,727 --> 00:16:19,062
Oh, holy shit, are they still on strike?
343
00:16:19,229 --> 00:16:22,232
Hey, Eugene Debs,
it's only been about ten hours.
344
00:16:22,399 --> 00:16:24,485
All right?
- So you'd rather die in there...
345
00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:27,738
...than give us a cost-of-living
adjustment?
346
00:16:28,363 --> 00:16:31,200
MALORY: Yes.
- Well, I can arrange that.
347
00:16:31,366 --> 00:16:32,701
Crunch!
348
00:16:32,868 --> 00:16:34,661
I love that you know how to do that.
349
00:16:34,828 --> 00:16:36,705
Well, now you're trapped.
Happy?
350
00:16:36,872 --> 00:16:37,915
[PHONE RINGING]
351
00:16:38,081 --> 00:16:40,417
MALORY: Yes.
- Ugh! Laundry.
352
00:16:40,584 --> 00:16:42,044
Oh, wait, are we open?
353
00:16:42,211 --> 00:16:43,754
What? Sir, you have to slow...
354
00:16:43,921 --> 00:16:45,756
Jeezy Petes, get a load of this guy.
355
00:16:45,923 --> 00:16:49,259
LANA [OVER SPEAKER]: We're taking heavy
fire and we need an extraction, dumb-ass!
356
00:16:49,426 --> 00:16:50,552
Lana?
357
00:16:50,719 --> 00:16:54,014
ARCHER: Ha! She thought you were a man.
- LANA: Shut up. Cyril, baby...
358
00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:56,016
...we're pinned down, okay?
We need a... Aah!
359
00:16:56,183 --> 00:16:57,768
Lana!
- MALORY: What's going on?
360
00:16:57,935 --> 00:17:00,103
LANA:
We need evac. A helo, a jump-jet.
361
00:17:00,270 --> 00:17:02,272
ARCHER:
At this point, really anything.
362
00:17:02,439 --> 00:17:05,400
MALORY: Don't just stand there, idiots.
- Yeah, come on. Get them out of there.
363
00:17:05,567 --> 00:17:08,028
Uh, we need the sat-com link to do that.
364
00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:09,947
So?
- So it's upstairs.
365
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:13,450
And, uh, someone broke the elevator.
366
00:17:13,617 --> 00:17:17,037
And Miss Fire Hazard in there
bricked up the only stairwell.
367
00:17:17,204 --> 00:17:19,206
MALORY:
Don't talk to me about fire hazards.
368
00:17:19,373 --> 00:17:23,001
All you people did in there was smoke.
- LANA: Oh, God, I'm hit.
369
00:17:23,168 --> 00:17:25,796
ARCHER: Lana!
- Will somebody please do something?
370
00:17:25,963 --> 00:17:29,132
ARCHER: Like what, Cyril? I'm blind.
- No, us. Here.
371
00:17:29,299 --> 00:17:30,759
ARCHER: Oh.
- Krieger, Bilbo.
372
00:17:30,926 --> 00:17:32,636
Come on,
can't you guys do something?
373
00:17:32,803 --> 00:17:34,846
Wha...? No.
374
00:17:35,514 --> 00:17:36,890
Oh, wait, I meant yes.
375
00:17:37,057 --> 00:17:38,976
[KEYBOARD CLACKING]
376
00:17:39,142 --> 00:17:41,728
Roger that, Zebra-Two. Stand by.
377
00:17:41,895 --> 00:17:44,856
Helo's 10-4, just needs you
to upload their GPS coordinates...
378
00:17:45,023 --> 00:17:46,233
...into his HUD.
379
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:49,027
Which I will do
with these cell phones.
380
00:17:49,194 --> 00:17:51,154
Holy shit,
you geeks are bad-ass.
381
00:17:51,321 --> 00:17:53,949
We couldn't have done it
without an electrical insulator.
382
00:17:54,116 --> 00:17:56,618
So thank Cyril
for the tiny brown diamond.
383
00:17:56,785 --> 00:17:58,785
LANA: What?
- ARCHER: Wait, did we get the diamond?
384
00:17:58,829 --> 00:18:01,748
LANA: What? No. But Cyril,
why did you have a diamond?
385
00:18:01,915 --> 00:18:05,335
Oh, uh, just my ear-stud.
You know, from college.
386
00:18:06,378 --> 00:18:07,698
LANA: Really?
- ARCHER: Called it.
387
00:18:07,838 --> 00:18:11,091
And, again, you do realize it'll be
totally destroyed in the process.
388
00:18:11,258 --> 00:18:12,884
Yes, just hurry up. Please.
389
00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:17,014
Okay, uploading GPS coordinates.
390
00:18:17,180 --> 00:18:19,641
Wait a second.
- LANA: Damn it, we don't have a second.
391
00:18:19,808 --> 00:18:21,560
ARCHER:
Lana, I'm sure we have one second.
392
00:18:21,727 --> 00:18:24,771
But seriously, it does sound like
we're about to be overrun, so...
393
00:18:24,938 --> 00:18:28,275
MALORY: Get my son out of there.
What the hell are you people waiting for?
394
00:18:28,442 --> 00:18:31,778
A goddamn cost-of-living adjustment.
- LANA: What?
395
00:18:31,945 --> 00:18:33,530
Hey, yeah
- No!
396
00:18:33,697 --> 00:18:36,783
Krieger, this is not the time for this.
- It is exactly the time.
397
00:18:36,950 --> 00:18:38,869
So, what's it gonna be, you harpy?
398
00:18:39,036 --> 00:18:41,788
You ever wanna see your son again?
399
00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:44,374
MALORY:
Not at the number you quoted me.
400
00:18:44,541 --> 00:18:46,181
ARCHER: Mother!
- That number is pegged...
401
00:18:46,209 --> 00:18:47,711
...to the consumer price index.
402
00:18:47,878 --> 00:18:50,213
MALORY:
Where? The People's Republic of Canada?
403
00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,924
LANA: Jesus, take it out of our bonuses.
- ARCHER: What?
404
00:18:53,091 --> 00:18:55,218
Mother, no, listen to me. Aah!
405
00:18:55,385 --> 00:18:57,679
I'm hit. I'm hit and I'm blind.
406
00:18:57,846 --> 00:19:00,891
Jesus, Ms. Archer, your child is dying.
407
00:19:01,058 --> 00:19:04,186
MALORY: Oh, all right.
If they'll give up their bonuses...
408
00:19:04,353 --> 00:19:06,271
ARCHER: Mother!
- MALORY: ...you can have your lousy...
409
00:19:06,438 --> 00:19:07,814
...cost-of-living adjustment.
410
00:19:07,981 --> 00:19:09,358
[ALL CHEER]
411
00:19:09,524 --> 00:19:10,984
Something good's happening.
412
00:19:11,151 --> 00:19:13,195
And you can have your dick son back.
413
00:19:13,362 --> 00:19:16,156
[DEVICE POWERS UP
THEN REGISTER CLICKS]
414
00:19:16,323 --> 00:19:17,532
[ALL GASP]
415
00:19:17,699 --> 00:19:19,576
MALORY: What's going on?
- ARCHER: I hear a helicopter.
416
00:19:19,743 --> 00:19:21,411
Oh, yeah.
- ARCHER: Holy shit...
417
00:19:21,578 --> 00:19:25,415
...my other senses are already heightened.
- Hey, this time I saved Lana.
418
00:19:25,582 --> 00:19:29,753
But... Oh, God, Pam. Two months' salary.
- Cyril.
419
00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:32,255
You can't put a price on good pussy.
420
00:19:32,422 --> 00:19:35,926
Roger that, Zebra Two.
Hey, the helo's got them. They're safe.
421
00:19:36,093 --> 00:19:37,893
ALL [APATHETICALLY]: Hooray.
- MAN: Way to go.
422
00:19:38,011 --> 00:19:40,597
MALORY:
Then get me out of this sweat-box!
423
00:19:44,601 --> 00:19:47,729
Because I am officially out of gin.
424
00:19:49,815 --> 00:19:52,776
Oh, come on, Archer, not now, I'm serious.
425
00:19:52,943 --> 00:19:54,277
Hey, I'm serious!
426
00:19:54,444 --> 00:19:56,196
Look at me, seriously, Lana.
427
00:19:56,363 --> 00:19:59,658
Forget the eye bandage,
but the hair, the strong jaw line.
428
00:19:59,825 --> 00:20:01,368
Who do I remind you of?
- Nobody.
429
00:20:01,535 --> 00:20:02,994
Say it.
- Don't make me do that.
430
00:20:03,161 --> 00:20:05,122
Say it. Say it!
- Ugh.
431
00:20:05,288 --> 00:20:07,582
Burt Reynolds in Deliverance.
432
00:20:07,749 --> 00:20:10,877
No! Not in Deliverance.
Ha, ha.
433
00:20:11,044 --> 00:20:12,921
In Gator.
- Ugh.
434
00:20:13,088 --> 00:20:14,631
Right?
435
00:20:16,466 --> 00:20:18,385
How can you not see that?
436
00:20:58,592 --> 00:20:59,593
[English - US - PSDH]
437
00:20:59,643 --> 00:21:04,193
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