Original subtitles

Ah.

(Anders exhales)

- What are you saying? - It's impossible to get through here.

- 35 Hours and 30 minutes total time so far.

(chuckles)

Oh.

- [Team Member] If you snack well, and then...

My right knee is so fucked.

(Anders exhales)

(Anders exhales)

I've been having troubles with the knee

for now a month and a half.

And there's only one month until we take off.

So that, I mean, I have to do everything to fix it.

(physical trainer speaking in foreign language)

- In November and December, those were tough months.

So I think my parents saw that

and then they saw that as, you know, am I,

you know, am I taking care of myself?

Am I healthy through this process?

You know, I just clearly remember

that conversation in my apartment.

Why does it have to be now? I could just postpone it.

Yeah, I think I would see like 2% on, you know,

just breaking completely.

(family conversing in foreign language)

- So New Year's Eve,

home.

I can't remember since I had a long bike ride

because of the troubles with my knee,

you know, having a night like this,

we really just

(exhales deeply)

wanna relax,

party

like everyone else.

(conversing in foreign language)

(speaking in foreign language)

- I could feel the amount of pressure,

the amount of risk that my brother had taken.

Some frustration that I experienced

was this somewhat fear of the unknown.

It'll be fine.

- I love you. - Love you too.

- And I was worried for his knee.

Two, three months before, I'm not seeing him move.

And that worries me.

I was worried that we would get there,

and he would not be able to run.

(strong winds blowing)

(strong winds continue blowing)

- [Anders] We were 36 and a half hours into the Iceman,

which meant we had passed the weather window.

The team knew that.

But I wasn't really focused on that at all.

In my mind, I just wanted to finish it.

(strong winds blowing)

- How many kilometers? - 7.5.

(strong winds blowing)

(strong winds continue blowing)

I kind of lost track of time.

I forgot to have some patience and to take care of myself.

I found myself making bad decisions

and I had to tell him I need to sleep.

And in my mind I was just like,

"You're fucking not leaving me, now."

If Anthon tells me I need a break,

then Anthon really needs a break.

(pensive music)

Being in that state, being tired yourself,

we had to go back to our tent.

This is 500 meters away.

This was dark heavy winds. You couldn't see anything.

We had to rely on our GPS.

I had this realization where I was like,

"This is too dangerous to be out."

(wind howling)

(strong gusty wind blowing)

We decided that I was just gonna walk,

and everybody else would go back to their tents for safety.

And so I walked with Oli for seven kilometers.

It was pitch dark.

You couldn't see two meters ahead of yourself.

I was getting dizzy.

It was difficult for me just to walk.

We quickly went through

the pros and cons of continuing at the point,

it wasn't a race anymore.

It was basically just survival.

(gusty wind blowing)

- [Cory] Anders. - Yeah.

- [Cory] Can you give us an update?

- We have this blizzard,

and I will start walking with Oli,

and we decided to,

postpone it three hours until everybody is more rested.

'Cause right now, time is not,

time doesn't matter anymore now,

just now it's just important for me to finish this

and yeah, we would just be risking it,

if we kept on going just two of us.

- Anthon, Anthon, this is Cory.

Do you copy?

It's not good that they have radio silence. I don't understand that.

They should be...

- ahead of things. - Yeah.

It's been a long time since we heard from them.

(wind whistling)

- It could be because... - They could've run out of batteries.

Yeah, or their tent could be covered in snow.

- [Cory] Yeah. I don't think we're getting a hold of them.

(wind blowing)

(shovel thumping)

- [Team Member] I remember waking up at one point

being completely like fixated

by the weight of snow on top of the tent.

(shovel continues thumping)

So Cory had to dig the snow from the tent.

You just hear the shovel and in the meantime,

you know that if he hits like the tent,

just scratches it,

it's game over.

(snow squelching)

(strong winds blowing)

Where's Herman?

- I think it was day two,

around eight o'clock in the evening,

Greg and I got back to the boat,

and I started dumping all the footage

before I need to go off to reach you guys again.

I tried calling Phil and I got no answers

and then suddenly I just hear like scratches.

(imitates radio noises)

Like no solo travels, not safe.

And to give a little context,

we had the boat anchored up in a bay

where we had six safety ropes to all angles

holding the boat in one place.

- Holy fuck! - What?

- The white line is nearly about to snap. - Oh no.

What do we do?

- And then one of the rope snaps.

It was just panic on board.

Greg's tried to scramble some ropes

and see how can we solve this problem.

And while he's outside in winds

way over a hundred kilometers an hour,

this rope snaps.

(loud bang)

I could see the fear in both Cath and Greg's eyes

because now it's serious trouble.

And then another rope snaps.

(loud bang)

Cath picks up the radio and calls in mayday.

Like mayday is the last, last thing.

We're slamming against the rocks.

And then Cath tells me, with the straightest face,

"Herman, stop filming.

I need you to jump on land.

We need this rope that we have used to block the ice.

I need you to go up on land and toss it to me."

I tell Cath,

"I'm not sure I can do that, handle that task."

We get a small glimpse of a bit slower wind.

At that point I was like, "Fuck it, I need to try."

So I jump in the Zodiac, pull myself across.

I just basically had to jump from the Zodiac onto land.

So I was soaked. I started crawling along the land,

because of the wind, there was no chance to be able to walk.

And I start untying this rope and it's so tight.

While I was reaching the rope,

my hat and my mittens blew off.

Finally, I kind of thought just slowly with one hand

loosening the rope, and then pause it

while laying on the ground,

and I start crawling back to a big rock

where I could shelter.

I was so scared. And this was the first point

where I actually feared for my life.

And I lay there for what felt like an eternity.

(wind howling)

(strong winds blowing)

- I don't know how I made it through that bike ride.

I've never been so broken in my life,

both physically and mentally.

(wind flaps tent noisily)

Anthon, do you copy?

Anthon, Anthon, this is Anders.

Do you copy?

(tense music)

(strong wind blowing)

- Anthon, Anthon. This is Cory.

Do you copy?

We ran out of food,

and we had a ice cave that we built early on

as a surplus for us if we ever needed to go,

and gather more food.

(strong winds blowing)

I remember just looking around and then looking back at you

and being like, is this where it is?

Is this it?

I realized that there was no way that we're gonna get it.

- I do have something I wanna say.

There was a moment with Anders and I

that I will never forget.

As an independent artist,

I was going through a really hard time,

and (chuckles softly)

I was coming home for Christmas.

It was a very dark time for me,

and a lot of thoughts about giving up or is it all worth it?

And I hadn't really said much that,

that those days up until Christmas Eve.

But someone asked me like, "How are you?"

And then we started talking and then in our family

it's instantly like,

"This is what you should do. This is the plan.

We can work this out. And we'll..." you know,

or Anthon will always have the good questions

and like, "But you don't need this.

Why do you need this?"

And I keep thinking like,

you know, I have to have the good argument.

I have to defend myself in my case.

And as I was doing that, I just totally like lost it.

I started like, I got a panic attack basically.

And I remember,

I just remember being on my couch and like had,

I remember thinking like, "You're about to pass out."

So I like, I put my head between my legs,

and I remember like the whole room just froze

and no one knew like what to do.

And Anders just like runs over and grabs my shoulders

and just shakes me and be like,

and he starts crying and like just,

I've never seen Anders like that.

I just felt like he just understood. (sniffles)

He just understood.

He keeps telling me that what I'm doing is so much harder,

because to him what he's doing is he's the only one.

But what I'm doing is like, there's millions of us.

So for me to stand out and do my thing

is a completely different Iceman as he says.

(radio beeps)

- [Anthon] Cory, Cory, Anthon, Anthon.

Anthon, Anthon, this is Cory.

- [Anthon] How is Anders doing?

He's all right.

- [Anders] What luxury do you guys have over there?

- How are you guys doing?

We're good. We've all peed in the same water bottle

and now Jan is cooking some porridge for us for dinner.

- Sounds like brotherhood.

Happy to hear that. (radio beeps)

- The storm was gone,

and then suddenly nobody was doing anything.

And then I felt we cannot wait anymore.

The time is 2:32.

We've been here for about...

... 27, 28 hours.

But we made it. The weather is calm. We can trust the weather now.

(radio crackling)

I just told Anders,

"15 minutes, you're gonna meet out here

and then we're gonna finish this."

I think he was caught up in the struggle at that moment

running on a glacier.

And I realized that you don't see what we see right now.

And what we are seeing is that you have 10 kilometers left

on something people thought was impossible,

and you need to realize that yourself as well.

You show that it's fucking possible!

You show that you live out your message!

You show that you are what you fucking say!

You're doing it, Anders!

You're fucking doing it!

(snow squelching)

That's it! That was already 1 km. That was 1 km!

- [Team Member] He needed that.

- In that moment, I had this feeling of just

finding my purpose there.

(snow squelching)

- Something in me just says

that Anders shut down for these years

probably to figure out when am I gonna press that button.

And that happened in Antarctica.

It started as a calm morning and it ends with a calm morning.

(snow squelching)

(calm ethereal music)

(team cheering)

(Anders and Anthon sniffling softly)

I want to be the first person... I will be the first person

doing an Iceman in Antarctica.

- [Camera Person] 30 Seconds, 30 seconds.

Come on, come on.

- I just have to remember that I can do so much fucking more

than I think I can, that I allow myself to believe.

- This was just as much a project to test himself

of how much he could believe in himself

when nobody else did.

He now know that that voice comes from a truth.

(gentle upbeat music)

72 hours and 54 minutes.

(Anders sighs)

We fucking did it. (team applauds)

(team cheers and whoops)

- Good morning to you.

(Anders whoops)

- Let's go!

(Anders whoops)

- Anders is giving people a gift.

He's giving people the gift of hope,

and his willingness to suffer intentionally

gives people hope on their journey

where they're not suffering intentionally.

That's the greatest gift you can give anybody.

Well done, Anders.

A new beginning.

(Anthon sighs)

You've finished what you started.

- I'm proud of you. - I'm proud of you too.

- I love you. - Love you too, bro.

(calm uplifting music)

- We get contact with base,

they're telling us to stay calm and they will get people

and come help us.

The marine guys were like,

"Okay, this is not safe for you anymore.

All of you guys need to come back to the base."

We wait there while the divers do their job

and attach on new ropes

and try to pull the boat slowly back.

Greg ended up being swam back to the boat with the divers

because our skipper Cath, she refused to leave the boat,

which was eventually pretty heroic thing to do.

I get back to the base and I was just sitting there alone.

I was so in shock still, I think.

So I just ate, got a room and I just laid down.

It was the first time in over 48 hours

where I could actually sleep.

So I wake up unnaturally early in the morning,

like 6:00 or something, and as I walk out the door,

I turn around the corner and I just see Anders

suddenly I just hit me. I was like, "Oh, fuck."

Because then I realized also

you guys have been on the glacier

when this whole thing has happened down by the boat.

And you guys probably needed to be rescued as well,

was my first initial thought.

So I was just, "Oh fuck, you guys got rescued"

I mean, does that mean the whole race was just canceled

and stuff?

And I was asked, I just asked Anders plain,

"What happened, dude? Are you okay?"

And he was like, "Yeah, I just finished the race."

(everyone chuckles)

And I was like,

"The fuck you mean you just finished the race?"

And I was so confused,

but at the same time I was so relieved

that kinda he was safe and he was like,

"Yeah, the rest of the guys are kind of in the food area."

And I walked out and saw the whole gang

sitting in the dinner area,

and it was just the most surreal moment.

Everyone was just safe.

Everyone's smiling.

I you got something which ended up

with my bag coming home from the expedition.

And that is the tag from the Chilean base you got

when you finished the race.

- Huh!

And it's been two years now, I've had this.

I haven't said anything to you,

but I've always had this to bring you

so we finally meet again,

and this belongs to you.

- Crazy.

- Yeah.

(Anders exhales)

(speaking in foreign language)

- You know, it all came from it being ironic

that, you know, during the Iceman and you know,

going out and doing speaks at primary schools

and to young kids,

I'm telling them to pursue their own Iceman in life

when the fact is I've not pursued my own Iceman in life.

- [Interviewer] Here you go.

- Yeah.

So project 30.

- [Interviewer] What's project 30?

- Project 30 is pursuing my childhood dream

of becoming a professional football player.

- [Interviewer] And what's 30?

- 30 is the age I'm restarting my football career.

(gentle music)

♪ I'm 'bout to do this shit ♪

♪ Sick of sitting here ♪

♪ Only got a couple years before I disappear ♪

♪ I don't know, just a man ♪

♪ But there's more inside me than these people understand ♪

♪ Oh, I think this time I went and found ♪

♪ A way ♪

♪ I'm looking for something different ♪

♪ To clear my mind ♪

♪ I'm headed to someplace distant ♪

♪ That I might not find ♪

♪ And I know ♪

♪ That you're worried ♪

♪ I won't make it, but ♪

♪ No ♪

♪ Don't worry ♪

♪ I'm gonna make it home ♪

♪ I could die ♪

♪ I'ma do it though ♪

♪ Hope my life becomes a symbol of what's beautiful ♪

♪ Take it there, make it back ♪

♪ All these people think I'm crazy ♪

♪ I'm okay with that ♪

♪ Oh, I think it's time ♪

♪ I went and found a way ♪

♪ I'm looking for something different ♪

♪ To clear my mind ♪

♪ I'm headed to someplace distant ♪

♪ That I might not find ♪

♪ And I know ♪

♪ That you're worried ♪

♪ I won't make it, but ♪

♪ No ♪

♪ Don't worry ♪

♪ I'm gon' make it home ♪