Original subtitles

[♪]

[MOE READING]

Whew. What a moniker.

We made it. Now we got a chance to finish the Buzzard,

the greatest plane ever made.

Nobody ever thought of inventing a plane like ours.

You said it. We're great inventors.

Robert Fulton, Thomas Edison, Alexander Graham Bell,

Domenici and us.

[CHUCKLES]

CHORTLES Okay.

Let's finish her up so a-flying we can go.

Da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da.

ALL: ♪ A-flying we will go ♪

BOTH: Da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da.

ALL: ♪ A-flying we will go ♪

Zoom-- Oh!

♪ A-flying we will go ♪ Oh!

♪ A-flying we will go ♪

MOE: ♪ A-flying we will go ♪ Da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da-da.

ALL: ♪ A-flying we will go ♪

♪ A-flying we will go ♪

Break it up. Ooh--! Ooh!

Boy, when we paint the Buzzard

with this quick-drying melted rubber,

it's be waterproof and iceproof.

Right!

Hup! Hup!

Hup, hup, hup.

Now, in this-- Oh!

[GRUMBLES]

Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck.

Why you...

BOTH: Oh!

Come on... Oh, don't do that.

CURLY: Don't do that!

Where's your vice? Vice?

I have no vice.

I'm as pure as the driven snow.

But you drifted.

Oh! Get out of here.

Get the vice.

Mm!

Hold that.

Hold that.

Here, roll me a cigarette.

[BUBBLING]

Hey, when I say "now," tighten this vice, will you?

You can depend on me.

Let me see.

Now, if I--

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!

Look what you're doing! Oh, oh!

I did what you said, and you said "now."

Oh!

Oh, ungrateful, eh?

[BARKS]

Oh, get me out of this.

Oh, oh, oh, oh...

Oh... Hey, Moe, it's stuck.

Hit it on top of the head.

Oh...

Ooh! Oh! Oh! Oh...

[WHIMPERING] Ooh! Oh! Oh! Oh...

[WHIMPERING]

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh...

Oh, he broke it, I hope.

No, he didn't. Oh!

Why you...

Oh! I'll murder you.

Oh, no, no, Moe, Moe! I'll murder you.

Moe, no, I didn't mean it. Please. Look out.

Get out of the way.

No-- No-- Moe!

Wait a minute, wait a minute!

Don't you dare hit me in the head.

You know I'm not normal.

I'll "normal" you.

Ow!

Ow!

Mm!

Oh.

Okay, Moe. Help me, Larry.

Mm!

Come on, Moe. There you are.

There-- There you go, there. Come on.

Come on, boy.

Get this rubber off of me, you idiots.

You know that self-sealing rubber don't come off easily.

This is gonna be a tough job.

Inflate this rubber thing with that hydrogen gas.

Then when the gas fills the suit,

it'll pull away from my body

then you can cut it off in strips.

Now my hands are caught.

Gas on.

[GAS HISSES]

[GAS HISSING]

How you coming? Okay.

Gas off. Gas off.

[HISSING DWINDLES]

Hey, hurry up, you guys.

Get a knife and cut this off of me.

Okay.

Hold still.

[SCREAMS]

Ah--

My, oh, my-- Oh, oh, oh, oh!

Hey, Moe, what are you doing up there?

It's the gas, you idiots.

Shall I get you some bicarbonate of soda?

Shut up and get me down!

Oh! Oh!

Get me down!

Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck-- Come here, gimme.

Ah-- Ah-- Ah-- Ah--

LARRY: Open your mouth

and I'll push you away.

Okay.

Ow-- Oh-- Oh-- Oh-- Ow!

Oh. MOE: Help me, you guys.

I got an idea. Get out of the way.

Wa-hoo!

[ULULATES]

[GRUNTS]

[MOE WHIMPERING] [GRUNTING]

Ah!

Get out of here, you--

MOE: Get me down!

[MOE WHIMPERS]

Come on.

Mm!

Be careful.

I'll murder you. Whoa!

[CHOKED SCREAM]

Wait a minute, wait a minute!

We're out of rhythm.

When I say "three," we'll both yank together.

One...

What comes after "one"?

Two. Ooh!

Mm!

Thank you.

One, two,

three. BOTH: Ooh!

We got him. Ha-ha!

Are you okay, Moe?

Talk to me. Say a few--

That ain't Moe.

Shut up, you splinter brain. He's still up there.

Ah--! Come on.

MOE: Whoa! Hey, what dummies we are.

We can jump up and pull him down.

BOTH: Right! Right! Hup! Hup!

Alleyoop. Alleyoop.

Hup! Whoo-ya!

Oh, you feather brains. I'll murder you.

Whew.

Success. Success.

Let's get the knives.

Oh, I'm floating!

Save me! Oh...

Ah--! Ah--! Ah--!

He's a free balloon.

Oh, I'm floating.

[COCKS GUN]

What are you doing with that rifle?

Don't you know any better than to use a rifle?

You might miss him.

Here. Use the shotgun.

Oh. Nyuck, nyuck.

Whoo-whoo-whoo.

MOE: Save me-- Oh!

There he is.

I'm floating away.

Hold still, Moe. I'll have you down in a minute. I'm floating away.

Hold still, Moe. I'll have you down in a minute.

[SCREAMS]

Ah--! Ah--! Ah--!

[SCREAMING]

CURLY: Whoo-whoo-whoo.

[LOUD SPLASH]

[WARBLES]

I'm through.

So am I. Right.

At last the Buzzard is finished. So am I. Right.

At last the Buzzard is finished.

Let's get it out. Yeah, the aircraft men

will be here any minute to watch our test flight.

Yes, go on. I'm palpitating. Shut up.

Just remember, if we flop, we're drafted.

We've got to make good.

Hey, wait a minute. Who's gonna fly the Buzzard?

We don't know anything about flying.

Neither did the Wright Brothers, but they flew.

Anything the Wright Brothers can do,

the Wrong Brothers can do.

Right? Right.

Wrong... Brothers.

All right, we gotta get the Buzzard out.

Hey, wait a minute.

We can't get the Buzzard out. The door's too small.

Why take it out? Let's fly the garage with it.

[LAUGHS]

LARRY: Yeah, sort of a cabin job.

[ALL LAUGH]

Oh! Shut up.

I'll get you out of this. Wait a minute.

We got a cutting job to do.

Get some saws.

Let me see.

Hey, you nitwit.

Mm! Don't saw the wings.

You saw the garage.

I see the garage but I don't saw the garage.

You are speaking incorrectly.

You are "moidering" the king's English.

Et cetera.

See? Saw... see? See--?

Yeah, shut up!

You saw one side and Larry will saw the other.

Oh, I see. I saw.

Ow!

Not like that. Like this.

Oh! Oh!

[SQUEALS]

Oh! Oh!

Oh, look.

[WHIMPERING]

Come on. We gotta warm the plane up.

Hey, porcupine, get in the cockpit.

Contact!

Oh!

I'll murder you. Contact!

Contact!

Hey, wait a minute.

I want a contract too.

You can't get away with this.

Okay, okay.

You'll get a contract.

Step right on the dotted line.

Contact! Oh, boy, I'm gonna get--

Oh! Oh-ho! Oh!

Come on, get over here.

Contact.

LARRY: Contact.

[SPUTTERS]

Now, contact.

Contact.

Oh!

Whoa!

Moe!

Here we go again.

All right, get up.

You know, I never thought the Sky Aircraft Company

would watch a test flight of three screwballs

like the Wrong Brothers.

Hm. They're either miracle men or they're insane.

There they go. [AIRPLANE ENGINE WHIRRING]

Hey, quit waving bye-bye. I'm getting seasick.

Shut up.

Oh!

Boy, isn't this Buzzard a honey?

We ought to get a contract for a million of them.

Hey, move it, will you? You're on my leg.

Well, easy now. I told you-- Move over--

Quit shoving. Ow, my leg.

LARRY: You're on my leg. CURLY: Well, easy now.

LARRY: Move over. MOE: Shut up.

What was that? That isn't anything.

Just some little old wire broke loose

from some little old lever.

That was our rudder, you idiot.

Now we can't get our plane where we want it to go.

Is that important? Are we going anywhere?

Yeah, to the Army if this plane fails, you dope.

That wouldn't be bad. I wouldn't mind being a general.

Hup! Hup! Oh!

[PLANE SPUTTERS]

We're losing altitude.

We gotta get rid of some weight.

What are you looking at me for?

Is there any gas left?

I don't know. The arrow points halfway.

I don't know if it's half empty or half full.

Why...

Throw out the clutch.

Ah--!

But Moe, if I throw out the clutch--

Do as you're told.

Throw out the clutch.

I guess he knows what he wants, I hope.

Hey, roll me a cigarette.

Right. There you are.

[SPITS]

Here.

Oh, thanks. Whew.

Hey, I couldn't find the clutch,

so I'll throw out the gear-shift lever.

See? Whoa!

You idiot, I ought to kill you.

Take the controls.

I'll fix the rudder cable.

[SCREAMS]

Why you...

mutton head.

CURLY: Hey, what do I do next?

Oh.

[SCREAMING]

Hey, are you two guys going steady?

Get out of-- Whoa!

MOE: Whoa!

We're turning over.

My stomach's in my mouth.

[ALL SCREAMING]

Oh!

[LOUD SPLASH]

Oh! Oh!

[GRUMBLES]

Oh, boy. A bench.

[CHUCKLES]

What a life.

Nothing to do but live off the fat of the land.

And eat and sleep.

Attention!

Right shoulder, arms!

About face!

Oh!

Attention!

Present arms!

You dumbbells.

Oh.

Oh, a duck.

Look at mine.

But I missed.

Oh.

A duck for my tapeworm.

[ALL LAUGH]

Drop those ducks and follow that line!

Hey!

Don't go away.

Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck.

Now, get this.

I'm gonna make soldiers out of you guys

if I have to kill you.

And that goes for you too.

Attention!

Right shoulder, arms!

Right face!

By twos, forward march!

Nyuck, nyuck, nyuck.

Hey, don't look now but I think we're going the wrong way.

To the rear!

March!

Company, halt!

What do you guys think you're doing?

Playing Hippity-Hop at the Barbershop?

Now, snap into it and march like soldiers.

And that goes for you too.

About face!

I won't do it. He don't pay my salary.

It's a guy with a beard.

I would-- I-- Ah--!

About face.

Forward, march! About face.

Forward, march!

Company, attention!

Fall in on that line.

Fall in!

Now, listen,

one more break out of you guys and I'm gonna hang you.

All three of you.

Now, I'm gonna teach you how to be soldiers

whether you like it or not.

Right shoulder, arms!

Left shoulder, arms!

Right shoulder, arms!

Forward, arms! Inspection, arms!

Right shoulder, arms!

Arms, arms, arms, arms, arms, arms, arms!

Arms! Left shoulder, arms!

What do you think you're doing?

I'm gonna show you how to do the Manual of Arms.

Forward, arms!

Present arms!

Now, do it just like I did it.

Forward, arms! Present arms!

CURLY: Ooh! MOE: Ah--! Ah--! Ah--! Ah--!

CURLY: Whoo-whoo-whoo.

[♪]