Original subtitles

Thanksgiving is a holiday that brought together two different cultures.

The pilgrims came here with the best intentions.

They decided to flee an oppressive people and move to a new land where they thrived.

And became an oppressive people.

You get certain people in the same continent. There's going to be a problem.

Pilgrims and Indians, Protestants, Catholics, my family, anybody else's family.

And bring the whole thing on!

I wanted with him nice, thanksgiving. I mean, he's going to be a guest!

Great thanksgiving to earn it to RSVP for Easter.

Dad, kill me!

I'm going to sweep my lanys for it to do.

Pilgrims, plug it up!

Help me, Dad! Help me, I'm so home on now!

Aaron wants the perfect thanksgiving, but the only tools I have to make that happen are her family and my family. So I'll bring them together and love and peace. If I have to squeeze their coat of pendant necks until their porous jinn.

I don't want anyone! I don't want anyone! It's a matter with your family,36!

Brückenbalnt checkin' with me, cuts and bruises, have a seat, I'll be with you in a minute.

Okay,etu, I'm glad you're here! That's so much pain I mean.

Your father called and said you showed there was dislocated. I know how excruci Filter each week is.

I had the do Pierceen have a Tkmuch and my father called me.

Thank god, the smell of blood makes you your people hungry.

It's a par.

It's okay, honey.

It's not broken.

It's just dislocated.

I want you to know we are never getting married.

No, pop it back in.

I'll be fine. I'm not the former.

No.

We don't belong together.

Our family's both suck.

So we both suck.

And I don't want to be with someone who sucks.

And I don't want you to be with someone who sucks.

Well, huh, and you're just in shock.

No.

I've never been more serious about anything in my entire life.

We are not getting married.

Did... did that hurt? Yeah. The woman I love more than anything just said she wouldn't marry me.

No, that.

What just happened? I just touched you on the shoulder like this. Don't.

I'm talking about Aaron. Oh. Well, before you could surprise her with the engagement ring, you got rejected!

I did not get rid of you. You got shot down. Dave? I'm from the runway. I just go in the out of flames. You right Dave, oh my god.

Dude, I'm just screwing with you. I know. Stop it. She just had a bad day. She's in shock and he just snapped right off his. Nothing clears a woman's head quicker than a huge diamond ring.

Huge? That's a nice size. You know, good cut, medium color. I don't make a lot of money back off.

Honey, I have something for you. Nothing I want from you. Please go away.

Honey, I just want to talk to you. You don't have to spend my entire life alone. I have to get a lot of cuts.

Take a minute. You're going to need a huge diamond.

Get in. Can we get something to calm Aaron down right now? When you get a second?

My shoulders below my nipple. Can you still do this? Yeah.

Then sit your ass down.

I think my hand is broken. I need some medical marijuana.

It's Aaron's sister. I can vouch for her. Oh, and some rolling papers or an aluminum can.

But we need to talk about this never seen me again thing. Look, I found it turkey.

Okay, let's start there.

Nora, can you help me with your daughter?

Your father's a foul mouth son of a bitch. Fun. Listen to me. Nice dinner. It's all I wanted. A perfect moment. So I could tell my parents that we were getting married. So they would finally say to me, we're proud of you, Aaron. A simple, beautiful moment that you ruined. I ruined. That's right. The big old problem. It's all tightest.

Oh, man. Creamy. White bean or dark bean.

Creamy. You are the one who invited Hitler.

Oh, I'm Hitler. Christopher and I are breaking up because of you. You're breaking up because of me.

I told everyone to behave. I didn't think I had to tell you. You are an instigator. I never liked you. You can't invite a normal guy into a room with 15 damage people.

Putting Tommy, near Aaron's brother Michael, is kind of like given a gazelle, a complementary past, a lion, country, safari.

The key to forgiveness is homemade bread.

I'll have some homo bread, homo.

They like to be called gay. I'm not gay. I choose women, but you had to make a choice. Okay, that's it.

What if homo do this? My bad. I should have used words instead of fists. You suck.

It's impossible that your ex-convict gun-toning brother maybe nudged Tommy into unleashing the loaf of fury.

Oh, sorry. Maybe we should think Tommy for showing us what a mistake we were making.

Quit saying that. You're the one who invited Tommy.

Daddy, drugs, Aaron, now. Come on in.

Can I get a little of the good stuff for the shoulder? Sure, come with me. Hello, chair.

You are might want to bite your wallet. My wallet.

Tie this as places turn to freak me out. Did you hear that little girl screaming?

Yeah, what's her deal? Aaron's finally calm down. You should give it to her now. Give it what? Nothing. She's not ready for what? Nothing. Oh, I know what it is. I'm going to get one from my mom. An engagement ring? Oh my god, Dave. He's gonna marry his mom!

A woman dreams a special moment. For first kiss, meeting Mr. Ride. Hello.

And telling her parents she's getting married.

Everybody, everybody. Christopher and I haven't announced.

Today is about more than just Thanksgiving. You are here because you are the important people in our lives. Right, honey?

You're gonna live. People? They're finally picking God's forgiveness for living in sin.

All right, got it. Gonna take that call.

Proud and snitch.

Peter. I'm not even stir-engaged. Oh, my god. I bet you wanted to say that.

Oh my god, what did you go back in time and tell her there's no Santa Claus?

I think we were going to stay. We should give her the ring. Put it in a pie.

She doesn't want the ring. She wants a perfect moment. It was supposed to be Thanksgiving dinner.

And we're gonna do it here. What? Yeah, I finished what I start. Damn right. You take merit, I'll take Nora. She's wierry.

No fighting. Erin doesn't want fighting. She wants eating. We are having Thanksgiving dinner right here. Here, Erin will be happy today.

There's no turkey. There's no star-rever one. Well, he is happy.

There's a cafeteria and there's vending machines. Hey, it's a hornau plenty.

Then it's payback Nora. Yep, yep.

Takes a lot of strength. And an interstil forged by years of painful memories to stare truth in the face and go

No, no, no, no. The work for the Protestants, we'd all be living in T.P. Don't you think it's going right? Why? Because no one's gutted anybody yet? Don't be silly. They love the corn. What part of you, Ed? Your mother is hammered abusive. She's celebrating. Your father beat your brother like he's a rental. He was ignoring my corn. You're druggy sister sold my druggy brother drugs. She's starting our own business. Michael has called Tommy a home of so many times.

I think he wants to date him.

Is it Michael handsome?

Huh? You're going to have to face these North-Fans losers and tell them what you think of them or you'll live this nightmare of the rest of your life.

Don't be so negative. Come on. Let's tell them we're getting married.

Okay. Whatever you want.

Everybody, Christopher and I have an announcement.

I got a tablecloth for the table. I know. Perfect. As long as you didn't get it off some dead guy.

He didn't need it. Hey, kitty cat. I told you they'd be bloody. It's all right, Daddy brings the sugar.

All right. Did you give her the ring yet? Tommy? World spinning. Can't focus.

Don't ruin this. This is important to me.

First marriage always is. Honey, your family and my family. Thanksgiving dinner. The kind you eat. Not the kind you throw.

Wait. I got to stand up. There we go.

How come the new Indians? First-side their differences. And she heard a quiet meal. They came together and love, peace, harmony, and corn. Well, the Indians call them maids. But we corrected them with our fire sticks.

I'm fine. So, can I hear your tie in the knot? What are you going for the record? Nora, that's not Thanksgiving talk. Think like a pilgrim.

Can't they remember six? That's one way for each glass of rubbing alcohol you've had tonight.

That's corn. But Tommy likes corn. Is that me? It's going great. That water.

This is water. All right. Listen up, everybody. We are going to eat like a family. I swallow a lot of blood. I'm full. Look, I'm asking you to help me with your daughter. I'm not asking you to come over to my shop at midnight and cobble some shoes.

I like this guy. Is anyone to pull? You showed me what luscious you all are. Honey. No, that's what you said. I love him. But they're loose. Honey, please.

You're right. You're right. Kim has problems. She's had a hard life, but she did what she had to do. Drugs. Men, men for drugs.

She's like, woo! Honey, I have something for you. This proves I love you because I realize that I can't live without you.

So, are you married me and accept this as a token of my love?

Oh. And empty, velvet box. It's a metaphor for our relationship.

That's what I gave my third wife.

Where's the ring? There's a ring, too.

Michael.

Do you give it the ring yet?

Michael, I picked out a high school for stealing. He got put in jail for stealing. He was with these guys. He used to break into houses. He stole from them. The guys at feet.

Well, the hell's my fork?

Hey, my baby, I'm baby!

My parole, I'm not dead.

Hey, how's that stabbing garbage, but inside of the freeway thing going?

Funny. Michael, give Christopher back, it's wallet. All right. Get a chain.

You are so hot. Nice scream, Penelope. That's what a godman. If you don't give me that ring back, I am going to kick your ass.

Oh, no. I never came up against anything like you and Maximum security prison.

LAUGHTER

Well, you know what they don't have in Maximum security prison? What?

Dad!

LAUGHTER

He stole Aaron's ring. No. Yeah.

Do you have the ring? LAUGHTER You know, I never hit my boys. Instead, I took years to destroy their self-esteem and mold them into upstanding citizens. With you, I don't have that kind of time.

It's a little bit too much.

Dad never believed in hurting his kids. He believed in threatening to hurt his kids, which was effective because we never

stopped being afraid that Dad might forget what he believed in.

LAUGHTER Hey, who the hell do you think you are going after my kid? Yeah. Shut up!

LAUGHTER Why don't you teach him to be a man?

Hitting him on his inches him to be a drunk, can I really lose her?

LAUGHTER Sorry, we didn't know he stole your ring. Don't apologize to the wussy. If you had half a brain, he wouldn't have jumped a guy in front of two cops.

You see that? That's emotional, Dad. I mean, that's much more powerful. LAUGHTER

Here. Go throw your life away. Thanks, Dad. Aaron. Hunt. I know things didn't go exactly like we planned today. But here. You bought me a ring? Huh?

No. Well, that's the drug stock. They've worn off. Can we get her some more drugs? No. No. Chris, I can't marry you. Look at my family. I love you too much to drag you into this. Come on, my family's way more screwed up than yours. Exactly. No way. Your family's pretty screwed up. Your mom's a tweak. LAUGHTER There's no such thing as a perfect moment. The birth of a kid, screaming,

and then goo, first kiss. It's your aunt.

LAUGHTER I'm probably going to meet the woman that you're going to spend the rest of your life with.

And her family is alive.

LAUGHTER I'm only reading my point of jail. It's because the judge was a Protestant fool!

Protestants, burn them all.

LAUGHTER

Keep an eye on your dad so you know how we can get it.

My dad. Chris, you forgot, please. This thing's giving us to be perfect. I need some help here.

So no Protestants. LAUGHTER Mommy? Can I get you something? Oh, no. Honey, mommy has her water. LAUGHTER

That tweak, as you put it, could be the grandmother of our tweaky child. And that child is going to have the blood of alcoholics, drug addicts, and us.

Sure, he'll be able to build a car and he'll be pretty.

LAUGHTER Stop it. Stop being a baby. Oh, deduce, ruined. Everybody's bleeding. Oh, oh, oh, kids get to be a mutant.

LAUGHTER What's not ruined? And everybody's scabbing up?

LAUGHTER And you suck. And I suck. And our family's suck. But who fits better into your life than me?

Huh? I mean, who better to handle this and them? Better than me? I am the only one who can protect you.

It's a proposal, not a telecom.

LAUGHTER And you can protect me, right?

LAUGHTER OK, let's try this again. Aaron?

You're marrying me. I know. That's beautiful, man.

LAUGHTER Hold on!

LAUGHTER Oh, my goodness! Everybody over here! Right now. Thanks, Skidding.

This smells like a dead guy. Be quiet.

Oh, oh!

I expectations were burn you every time.

See, all you really can do is pick a future that you love and drive towards that.

Aaron is my future, and I love her.

Especially when she starts pimpslapin' her family.

That's my parents. What are you doing?

Putting the burn unit on speed dial.

Oh, the first stop it. It's going to be a perfect Thanksgiving.

Tommy's making his bread.

Thank you, God, for this food. We will eat it, not throw it.

Puck each other, not hit each other. Love the ones we can tolerate and screw the rest.

Christopher and I are getting married. Amen.

I said amen.

Ah, ah. Ah, ah. Ah, ah. Ah. It's perfect. Thanks. Giving is a holiday that brought together two different cultures.

And things may not always work out like you think they should, but they always work out. I'm thankful that the world's in perfect harmony at all times.

The pilgrims had it tough, but now we live in the strongest, most prosperous country in the world.

And the Indians?

Well, you know.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

I'm the funny one. No, I'm the funny one. No, I'm the funny one. I'm the funny one. Okay.

You