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Previously, on Royal Pains...
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- Paige Collins, will you marry me?
- Yes!
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You think you'll be able
to provide for Paige
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00:00:06,175 --> 00:00:08,175
in the style to which she is accustomed?
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00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:12,300
Maybe you should talk to someone.
6
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Wait... wait...
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Keep going...
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Das ist ihr nicht!
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What does that mean to you?
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Es ist nicht ihr... It's not her.
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My parents feel entitled to restitution.
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But parents cut me off, Raj.
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I can't even afford the gratuity on this!
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00:00:27,625 --> 00:00:28,825
Thank you again.
15
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Don't thank me. We need you around here.
16
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I want to grow Hankmed.
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I've heard these kinds
of suggestions before...
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And we're talking about
a whole new level here,
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I have a fully fleshed-out business plan.
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Is this about you wanting
a bigger business,
21
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or is this about you wanting
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00:00:41,903 --> 00:00:44,037
to make this a bigger business for Paige?
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No, thank you for hosting
such a lovely party.
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00:00:53,582 --> 00:00:55,582
Uh, wonderful, wonderful...
25
00:00:55,584 --> 00:00:56,583
Now, I'm going to...
26
00:00:56,585 --> 00:00:57,917
from looking at your home,
27
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it's a beautiful, exquisite home.
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I'm going to assume that you're
quite a wealthy man.
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00:01:02,257 --> 00:01:04,724
Would you agree to that?
30
00:01:04,726 --> 00:01:09,095
Now, I would like to guess the
exact amount of your net worth.
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00:01:09,097 --> 00:01:10,397
Hello, sir.
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Hello.
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What are you doing with these?
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I am promoting Hankmed
in an understated way.
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That's the way you prefer me
to do it, isn't it?
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00:01:17,939 --> 00:01:19,239
I guess, but...
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This promotion is so understated,
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no one even knows it's happening.
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It's total stealth marketing.
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God, this Pappy Van Winkle
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family reserve bourbon is so good.
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I told you.
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Oh, I added some footage
of the Jitney crash
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I found on YouTube.
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I am so grateful
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for that horrible, horrible accident.
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Evan...
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Just because, you know,
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we've gotten a lot of business out of it.
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This birthday party. Brand-new client.
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Found out about us because of the crash.
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That's great... now be quiet,
53
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'cause I want to watch the magician.
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I would like to borrow someone's watch.
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You, sir. May I?
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Yeah! Um, sure.
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Ah...
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If you don't mind me asking,
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how much was the box
of cereal that this came out of?
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00:02:00,048 --> 00:02:01,381
[Laughter]
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No, seriously,
what do you do for a living?
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I'm a... doctor.
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A doctor?
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With that watch. Wow.
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Apparently health care reform is working.
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00:02:09,958 --> 00:02:11,825
[Laughter] Ah...
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This is a watch.
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00:02:14,663 --> 00:02:16,596
Yeah, I'm not gonna let you
disappear this one, my friend.
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It was a gift from my girlfriend, so...
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It's really a lovely watch.
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- So, yeah, but you're not...
- Whoa.
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Now...
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Pl... just be careful, please.
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I will be gentle.
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I will be gentle.
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[Metal clanking] Unh!
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- Be careful, please.
- Let's see what happens.
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- What?
- Mmm.
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Mmm!
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[Smacks lips]
81
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The handkerchief.
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Okay.
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Now, that is a doctor's watch.
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[Applause] Thank you!
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Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
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It was wonderful being with you tonight.
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So thank you.
88
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And good night.
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[Applause] Oh, my God.
90
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That was totally amazing.
91
00:03:08,183 --> 00:03:09,816
Yeah, it was.
92
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Almost as amazing as you
trying to steal my watch.
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- Give it back.
- Wha...
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[Clanking]
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[Hyperventilating]
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Agh! Ah!
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Gah!
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[Grunting]
99
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[Breathing hard]
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[Jingling]
101
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Ladies and gentlemen,
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dinner is served.
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[Applause]
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Thank you.
105
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Thank you.
106
00:03:51,860 --> 00:03:53,059
Thanks.
107
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Are you really a doctor?
108
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Uh, watch and all, I'm afraid.
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Great trick.
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Thank you, thank you.
111
00:03:59,901 --> 00:04:02,569
Only it didn't go exactly as I planned.
112
00:04:06,073 --> 00:04:08,174
[Inhales sharply]
113
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I'm afraid that's not
the worst of my problems.
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[The Blue Van's Independence]
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♪ ♪
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♪ My independence went away ♪
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♪ I didn't listen when it said ♪
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♪ rely on yourself ♪
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♪ trusting someone else ♪
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♪ is a path for the silent ghost ♪
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Royal Pains 3x07 - Ta Da For
Original air date August 10, 2011
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Sync and corrected by atrn97g
www.addic7ed.com
123
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Um...
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is this okay?
125
00:04:42,337 --> 00:04:43,403
It's perfect. Thank you.
126
00:04:43,405 --> 00:04:46,739
Thanks.
127
00:04:48,942 --> 00:04:51,377
So... what got you into magic?
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00:04:51,379 --> 00:04:53,913
Uh, I thought it would impress the girls.
129
00:04:53,915 --> 00:04:56,015
Ah, the basis of so many things we do.
130
00:04:56,017 --> 00:04:57,350
Heh, I was wrong.
131
00:04:57,352 --> 00:04:59,886
Magic just made them think I was weird.
132
00:04:59,888 --> 00:05:01,687
- "Er." Weirder.
- Oh.
133
00:05:01,689 --> 00:05:03,222
Unfortunately, by the time
I figured that out,
134
00:05:03,224 --> 00:05:04,891
I had already gotten bitten by the bug.
135
00:05:04,893 --> 00:05:06,826
I thought butter was for burns.
136
00:05:06,828 --> 00:05:09,128
Common misconception.
137
00:05:09,130 --> 00:05:11,297
Butter traps heat in the tissue,
138
00:05:11,299 --> 00:05:12,665
which risks causing more damage
139
00:05:12,667 --> 00:05:14,167
and increases the chances of infection.
140
00:05:14,169 --> 00:05:15,802
Honey, on the other hand,
141
00:05:15,804 --> 00:05:18,137
has antiseptic qualities.
142
00:05:18,139 --> 00:05:20,273
It seems like you've been doing
magic tricks for a long time.
143
00:05:20,275 --> 00:05:21,774
Oh, since I was nine.
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00:05:21,776 --> 00:05:23,676
Not... not professionally,
of course, but...
145
00:05:23,678 --> 00:05:26,646
Two years ago,
I was doing magic part-time.
146
00:05:26,648 --> 00:05:28,681
While I was selling orthopedic shoes
147
00:05:28,683 --> 00:05:30,016
in Massapequa.
148
00:05:30,018 --> 00:05:31,317
Oof.
149
00:05:31,319 --> 00:05:33,586
And then, I started doing custom escapes
150
00:05:33,588 --> 00:05:34,620
at private parties
151
00:05:34,622 --> 00:05:35,922
for high-end clients.
152
00:05:35,924 --> 00:05:37,990
And then, you know,
business just took off.
153
00:05:37,992 --> 00:05:40,293
Rich people love custom.
154
00:05:40,295 --> 00:05:42,195
Ooh, yes, they do.
155
00:05:42,197 --> 00:05:44,063
- You on any medications?
- No.
156
00:05:44,065 --> 00:05:45,598
Well, a water pill.
157
00:05:45,600 --> 00:05:47,667
Helps me drop weight before a big escape.
158
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Okay, deep breath.
159
00:05:55,909 --> 00:05:57,143
Clear as day.
160
00:05:57,145 --> 00:05:58,177
You got lucky.
161
00:05:58,179 --> 00:06:00,213
I got unlucky.
162
00:06:00,215 --> 00:06:02,582
Magic is about rehearsal.
It's about practice.
163
00:06:02,584 --> 00:06:03,983
It's about planning.
164
00:06:03,985 --> 00:06:05,918
Everything was going according to plan.
165
00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:08,154
Then I started feeling weak and sweaty.
166
00:06:08,156 --> 00:06:11,324
I started getting panicky...
paralyzed by fear.
167
00:06:11,326 --> 00:06:13,159
It was like I was having a heart attack.
168
00:06:13,161 --> 00:06:16,262
Uh, m... maybe I'm just
getting older, I don't know.
169
00:06:16,264 --> 00:06:17,663
Maybe.
170
00:06:17,665 --> 00:06:19,699
But maybe something more is going on.
171
00:06:19,701 --> 00:06:20,900
No more water pills, okay?
172
00:06:20,902 --> 00:06:23,035
And let's do an EKG.
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00:06:23,037 --> 00:06:25,438
Okay. Okay.
174
00:06:30,477 --> 00:06:32,044
So I have been trying
to get time with Boris
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to discuss my memories of the crash,
176
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only I am having no luck.
177
00:06:34,883 --> 00:06:36,816
Well, he is a new father,
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and he is Boris.
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00:06:38,686 --> 00:06:41,954
And my calls do come with
a history of asking for money.
180
00:06:41,956 --> 00:06:43,556
You want I should set something up?
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00:06:43,558 --> 00:06:44,924
- Would you?
- Not a problem.
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Thank you.
183
00:06:48,496 --> 00:06:50,530
- Okay.
- Okay.
184
00:06:50,532 --> 00:06:51,931
[Typing on keyboard]
185
00:06:51,933 --> 00:06:53,933
- Any old business?
- Uh, yeah.
186
00:06:53,935 --> 00:06:55,768
Magic Andy's EKG came back clean,
187
00:06:55,770 --> 00:06:56,936
but as a precaution,
188
00:06:56,938 --> 00:06:58,170
I put him on a halter monitor,
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00:06:58,172 --> 00:07:00,106
which I'm checking later today
along with his burn.
190
00:07:00,108 --> 00:07:03,009
All right, anyone else?
191
00:07:03,011 --> 00:07:04,110
Any new business?
192
00:07:04,112 --> 00:07:05,478
A few follow-ups this morning.
193
00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:07,280
But then, if it's still right,
194
00:07:07,282 --> 00:07:09,215
I believe I have the afternoon off.
195
00:07:09,217 --> 00:07:12,118
Scheduled and scheduled, Divya.
196
00:07:12,120 --> 00:07:13,219
Big plans?
197
00:07:13,221 --> 00:07:14,654
No. No.
198
00:07:14,656 --> 00:07:15,821
Puttering, mostly.
199
00:07:15,823 --> 00:07:17,690
"Puttering." Very good.
200
00:07:17,692 --> 00:07:21,928
Well, uh, I have some new business.
201
00:07:21,930 --> 00:07:23,696
At the party yesterday,
202
00:07:23,698 --> 00:07:25,765
one of our Hankmed promotional DVDs
203
00:07:25,767 --> 00:07:29,468
somehow made its way into a VIPP.
204
00:07:29,470 --> 00:07:32,238
That's "Very Important Person's Pocket."
205
00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:33,239
Ah.
206
00:07:33,241 --> 00:07:35,007
And that person
207
00:07:35,009 --> 00:07:36,576
just happens to be...
208
00:07:36,578 --> 00:07:38,878
Matt Lauer.
209
00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:40,780
Ohh, you sucked up to Matt Lauer?
210
00:07:40,782 --> 00:07:42,248
I would have, but he left.
211
00:07:42,250 --> 00:07:44,183
However... thanks
to social networking sites,
212
00:07:44,185 --> 00:07:46,586
Us magazine, and
the freedom of information act,
213
00:07:46,588 --> 00:07:49,589
I learned that he has
a weekend place in Water Mill.
214
00:07:49,591 --> 00:07:53,559
He exercises at the Southampton
Swim and Racquet Club,
215
00:07:53,561 --> 00:07:54,594
and he can often be seen browsing
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00:07:54,596 --> 00:07:55,962
in M'Lady's Vestibule,
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00:07:55,964 --> 00:07:57,730
his favorite Hamptons antique store.
218
00:07:57,732 --> 00:07:59,799
Ah, well, as long
as you're not stalking him.
219
00:07:59,801 --> 00:08:02,802
Hank, I want to grow this business.
220
00:08:02,804 --> 00:08:04,136
For us.
221
00:08:04,138 --> 00:08:06,505
Evan... you wanna be on TV... for you.
222
00:08:06,507 --> 00:08:09,175
Why do you always
have to make it about me?
223
00:08:09,177 --> 00:08:10,309
It's not about me.
224
00:08:10,311 --> 00:08:11,644
It's always about you.
225
00:08:11,646 --> 00:08:12,778
All right, that's not fair
226
00:08:12,780 --> 00:08:13,779
and that's not true.
227
00:08:13,781 --> 00:08:15,414
Hey, so...
228
00:08:15,416 --> 00:08:17,016
Why didn't you tell Hank
229
00:08:17,018 --> 00:08:18,584
that you're doing shifts at the hospital?
230
00:08:18,586 --> 00:08:20,353
I was going to.
231
00:08:20,355 --> 00:08:22,154
But then I thought, why burden him?
232
00:08:22,156 --> 00:08:23,222
You know how he is.
233
00:08:23,224 --> 00:08:24,824
I mean, he'd want to help out.
234
00:08:24,826 --> 00:08:26,092
But then only way out of this
235
00:08:26,094 --> 00:08:28,461
is for me to pay back Raj's parents.
236
00:08:28,463 --> 00:08:30,029
Which is my problem, not his.
237
00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:31,130
I don't know how many
different ways I can say no!
238
00:08:31,132 --> 00:08:32,365
I can't believe you're refusing
239
00:08:32,367 --> 00:08:34,166
to do The Today Show.
240
00:08:34,168 --> 00:08:35,301
I'm not refusing.
241
00:08:35,303 --> 00:08:36,702
They're not asking.
242
00:08:36,704 --> 00:08:38,371
Which makes this
an argument about nothing.
243
00:08:38,373 --> 00:08:39,672
Okay, so if they did ask,
would you do it?
244
00:08:39,674 --> 00:08:41,140
What can I say that will
make you stop talking?
245
00:08:41,142 --> 00:08:43,676
- You can answer the question.
- Fine! Yes. Evan...
246
00:08:43,678 --> 00:08:46,579
if the real world somehow
collides with your world,
247
00:08:46,581 --> 00:08:48,648
and The Today Show wants Hankmed on it,
248
00:08:48,650 --> 00:08:50,016
yes, I will do it.
249
00:08:50,018 --> 00:08:51,717
Now, was that so hard to say?
250
00:08:51,719 --> 00:08:52,952
Yes.
251
00:08:52,954 --> 00:08:54,954
Look... it's your secret.
252
00:08:54,956 --> 00:08:57,323
And... I'll keep it.
253
00:08:57,325 --> 00:08:58,858
I just think that the longer I do,
254
00:08:58,860 --> 00:09:00,326
the more awkward things could get.
255
00:09:00,328 --> 00:09:01,527
It won't be forever.
256
00:09:01,529 --> 00:09:03,929
Just until I get my financial
house in order.
257
00:09:03,931 --> 00:09:06,432
And I give you my word,
it will not be awkward.
258
00:09:06,434 --> 00:09:09,402
What won't?
259
00:09:09,404 --> 00:09:12,071
Nothing.
260
00:09:49,342 --> 00:09:51,977
Oh, I'm so sorry, I'm s...
261
00:09:51,979 --> 00:09:53,112
[Sputters]
262
00:09:53,114 --> 00:09:54,647
Puh! I'm sorry.
263
00:09:54,649 --> 00:09:56,348
Oh, God, my stomach.
264
00:09:56,350 --> 00:09:58,150
- Gah!
- What the hell are you doing?
265
00:09:58,152 --> 00:09:59,752
I'm sorry. Okay, look.
266
00:09:59,754 --> 00:10:01,954
I just really want
to talk to you for two seconds
267
00:10:01,956 --> 00:10:03,622
about The Today Show, okay?
268
00:10:03,624 --> 00:10:06,692
Seriously? That's why
you're jumping on top of me?
269
00:10:06,694 --> 00:10:09,361
Yeah, k... kind of.
270
00:10:09,363 --> 00:10:10,863
Gee, I missed it this morning. All right.
271
00:10:10,865 --> 00:10:14,333
All right, tell me,
who was the musical guest?
272
00:10:14,335 --> 00:10:16,502
So... you're not Matt Lauer.
273
00:10:16,504 --> 00:10:18,604
No. And you're not Natalie Morales.
274
00:10:18,606 --> 00:10:20,372
That's it. We got that cleared up now?
275
00:10:20,374 --> 00:10:21,774
- Yeah.
- Can I finish my swim?
276
00:10:21,776 --> 00:10:23,576
Sure... sure.
277
00:10:23,578 --> 00:10:24,977
Have a good... lap.
278
00:10:32,586 --> 00:10:34,086
Andy?
279
00:10:35,889 --> 00:10:39,391
[Door creaks]
280
00:10:48,368 --> 00:10:49,835
[Chains jingling]
281
00:11:03,283 --> 00:11:04,450
Andy?
282
00:11:07,053 --> 00:11:08,220
Help!
283
00:11:08,222 --> 00:11:09,588
[Chains jingling]
284
00:11:09,590 --> 00:11:11,490
Andy?
285
00:11:11,492 --> 00:11:13,259
Okay... okay...
286
00:11:15,195 --> 00:11:16,495
[Grunts]
287
00:11:18,598 --> 00:11:19,665
Is there a key?
288
00:11:19,667 --> 00:11:21,133
No! No, there's not.
289
00:11:21,135 --> 00:11:22,401
All right, hang on.
290
00:11:22,403 --> 00:11:23,936
I'm gonna get you out of there.
291
00:11:26,740 --> 00:11:28,107
Good. Good.
292
00:11:36,750 --> 00:11:39,018
Are you okay?
[Gasping]
293
00:11:40,208 --> 00:11:42,642
Oh, my God. What is wrong with me?
294
00:11:42,944 --> 00:11:44,878
- What is wrong with me?
- I don't know yet.
295
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:46,646
I'm not seeing any arrhythmias
on your halter results,
296
00:11:46,648 --> 00:11:48,314
so it's probably not your heart.
297
00:11:48,316 --> 00:11:50,316
All you've got is a slightly
elevated heart rate
298
00:11:50,318 --> 00:11:51,751
while you were trapped.
299
00:11:51,753 --> 00:11:53,520
That's the thing.
I shouldn't have been trapped.
300
00:11:53,522 --> 00:11:55,188
I built this crate.
301
00:11:55,190 --> 00:11:57,323
I mean, it was like
I was in the chimney again.
302
00:11:57,325 --> 00:11:59,359
Paralyzed by fear.
303
00:11:59,361 --> 00:12:00,727
All right, well, then let's start
304
00:12:00,729 --> 00:12:02,562
by checking your reflexes. Here you go.
305
00:12:04,665 --> 00:12:06,066
Okay, lie down for me, please.
306
00:12:06,068 --> 00:12:08,701
All right.
307
00:12:08,703 --> 00:12:09,869
[Groans]
308
00:12:09,871 --> 00:12:12,005
[Sighs]
309
00:12:12,007 --> 00:12:13,173
Ooh!
310
00:12:13,175 --> 00:12:14,507
Oh ho. Whoa ho.
311
00:12:14,509 --> 00:12:16,076
[Chuckles]
Ooh.
312
00:12:16,078 --> 00:12:17,911
[Laughing]
That tickles.
313
00:12:17,913 --> 00:12:19,779
As long as it makes your toes flex.
314
00:12:19,781 --> 00:12:21,114
If they were to extend, it could indicate
315
00:12:21,116 --> 00:12:24,250
a lesion in your spinal cord
or cerebral cortex.
316
00:12:24,252 --> 00:12:26,419
Aren't you a big bag of sunshine?
317
00:12:26,421 --> 00:12:28,555
[Chuckles]
Lift your shirt, please.
318
00:12:28,557 --> 00:12:30,457
Yesterday, you mentioned
you take a diuretic
319
00:12:30,459 --> 00:12:31,825
to lose weight before an escape.
320
00:12:31,827 --> 00:12:33,560
I know, it's not a six pack.
321
00:12:33,562 --> 00:12:35,562
No, no, no, no. I didn't mean that.
322
00:12:35,564 --> 00:12:38,064
I need to test the quadrants
of your abdominals.
323
00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:41,234
All right, you can sit up now.
324
00:12:41,236 --> 00:12:43,269
What I'm getting at is,
325
00:12:43,271 --> 00:12:45,705
if you're feeling
the kind of pressure to perform
326
00:12:45,707 --> 00:12:47,607
that's got you taking water pills
327
00:12:47,609 --> 00:12:49,742
and freezing up in situations
you've rehearsed,
328
00:12:49,744 --> 00:12:53,079
then maybe what you have
is an anxiety disorder.
329
00:12:53,081 --> 00:12:55,148
Okay... yes, I...
330
00:12:55,150 --> 00:12:57,217
I have anxiety in my everyday life.
331
00:12:57,219 --> 00:13:00,186
But it's not supposed to spill over
332
00:13:00,188 --> 00:13:01,454
into my act.
333
00:13:01,456 --> 00:13:02,755
My act is rehearsed.
334
00:13:02,757 --> 00:13:04,157
There's no surprises.
335
00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:05,725
There's nothing to fear.
336
00:13:05,727 --> 00:13:07,560
I'm actually more comfortable
in front of an audience
337
00:13:07,562 --> 00:13:10,263
than I am one on one.
338
00:13:10,265 --> 00:13:11,965
- You okay, buddy?
- Hmm.
339
00:13:11,967 --> 00:13:14,300
It's funny. I'm the exact opposite.
340
00:13:14,302 --> 00:13:15,969
Yeah, most people are.
341
00:13:15,971 --> 00:13:18,972
But to me, that... that's the real magic
342
00:13:18,974 --> 00:13:20,006
of my act.
343
00:13:20,008 --> 00:13:22,275
That I can transform this...
344
00:13:22,277 --> 00:13:24,711
introverted ex-shoe salesman
345
00:13:24,713 --> 00:13:26,546
into the kind of polished performer
346
00:13:26,548 --> 00:13:29,015
that rich, successful people,
they clap for.
347
00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:30,583
Well, if it is an anxiety disorder,
348
00:13:30,585 --> 00:13:32,552
it can likely be controlled
with medication.
349
00:13:32,554 --> 00:13:34,787
What about side effects?
350
00:13:34,789 --> 00:13:37,123
Magic requires dexterity,
it requires focus.
351
00:13:37,125 --> 00:13:39,025
I can't take anything
that's gonna impair that.
352
00:13:39,027 --> 00:13:41,060
Look, I'm not prescribing anything yet.
353
00:13:41,062 --> 00:13:42,862
Let me take some blood.
354
00:13:42,864 --> 00:13:44,097
See if that gets us anywhere.
355
00:13:44,099 --> 00:13:45,398
And, in the meantime...
356
00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:47,033
no escapes.
357
00:13:48,569 --> 00:13:50,336
I have a huge show tonight.
358
00:13:50,338 --> 00:13:52,372
If I don't barely escape from that crate
359
00:13:52,374 --> 00:13:54,474
right before J. Turner Wellerbing
360
00:13:54,476 --> 00:13:56,075
drives his Aston Martin into it,
361
00:13:56,077 --> 00:13:57,377
he's not gonna be happy.
362
00:13:59,046 --> 00:14:00,880
Okay, I'm not saying don't do any magic.
363
00:14:00,882 --> 00:14:02,715
Just stick to turning handkerchiefs
364
00:14:02,717 --> 00:14:03,883
into Hermes scarves
365
00:14:03,885 --> 00:14:05,818
and quarters into krugerrands.
366
00:14:05,820 --> 00:14:07,187
You said rich people love custom.
367
00:14:07,189 --> 00:14:08,488
Isn't that what you said?
368
00:14:08,490 --> 00:14:10,390
Look, I will walk your blood
into the lab myself
369
00:14:10,392 --> 00:14:12,125
and try to work my magic.
370
00:14:12,127 --> 00:14:13,693
But until I know for sure
what's going on with you,
371
00:14:13,695 --> 00:14:15,495
I'm sorry, but Mr. Wellerbing
is just gonna have to drive
372
00:14:15,497 --> 00:14:17,197
his Aston Martin into someone else.
373
00:14:26,640 --> 00:14:28,007
[Cell phone rings]
374
00:14:31,412 --> 00:14:32,612
[Softly]
Yes?
375
00:14:32,614 --> 00:14:34,013
Hey, I need our billing number
376
00:14:34,015 --> 00:14:35,582
for the lab at Hamptons Heritage.
377
00:14:35,584 --> 00:14:36,583
Again?
378
00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:42,755
[Whispering]
"O" 8a7bgp732.
379
00:14:42,757 --> 00:14:44,524
Why is that so hard for you to remember?
380
00:14:44,526 --> 00:14:46,192
Hang on, let me get a pen.
381
00:14:46,194 --> 00:14:47,460
And why are you talking like that?
382
00:14:47,462 --> 00:14:48,828
Are you stalking Matt Lauer?
383
00:14:50,798 --> 00:14:52,899
[Whispering]
No, I am not stalking him.
384
00:14:52,901 --> 00:14:55,435
I am... observing him from a safe distance
385
00:14:55,437 --> 00:14:58,404
until the moment is right
for me to, uh, strike.
386
00:14:58,406 --> 00:15:00,073
Evan, that's stalking.
387
00:15:00,075 --> 00:15:02,642
Just call me when when you find a pen.
388
00:15:02,644 --> 00:15:04,210
Wait, I got one! Hello? Evan?
389
00:15:04,212 --> 00:15:05,411
- Uhh!
- Hey there.
390
00:15:05,413 --> 00:15:06,879
- Hey.
- Problem?
391
00:15:06,881 --> 00:15:09,382
I need Evan to give me
our billing number for the lab.
392
00:15:09,384 --> 00:15:12,085
"O" 8a7bgp732.
393
00:15:12,087 --> 00:15:14,020
How does he... how do you...
394
00:15:14,022 --> 00:15:15,054
one more time.
395
00:15:15,056 --> 00:15:16,289
[Laughs]
396
00:15:16,291 --> 00:15:19,325
Come here.
397
00:15:19,327 --> 00:15:21,127
"O" 8a...
398
00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:22,562
732...
399
00:15:23,564 --> 00:15:25,098
there you go.
400
00:15:25,100 --> 00:15:26,132
Problem solved.
401
00:15:26,134 --> 00:15:27,333
Thank you.
402
00:15:27,335 --> 00:15:28,468
Now can you get Evan to quit
403
00:15:28,470 --> 00:15:30,103
his Today Show obsession?
404
00:15:30,105 --> 00:15:31,237
I'm sure it's just a phase.
405
00:15:31,239 --> 00:15:32,438
Yeah, you thought him saying,
406
00:15:32,440 --> 00:15:34,307
"Evan R. Lawson, CFO of Hankmed"
407
00:15:34,309 --> 00:15:35,475
was just a phase too.
408
00:15:35,477 --> 00:15:37,477
Wishful thinking, I guess.
409
00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:39,279
- You know what I wish?
- Hmm?
410
00:15:39,281 --> 00:15:40,847
I wish there was a fake Today Show
411
00:15:40,849 --> 00:15:42,282
I could hire to interview him.
412
00:15:42,284 --> 00:15:43,716
Then he'd stop.
413
00:15:43,718 --> 00:15:45,151
You know, I have a friend
414
00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:46,986
in the Suffolk College Media Department...
415
00:15:46,988 --> 00:15:49,489
she might be able
to arrange something like that.
416
00:15:49,491 --> 00:15:50,857
But wouldn't that be cruel?
417
00:15:50,859 --> 00:15:51,924
Yeah.
418
00:15:51,926 --> 00:15:53,559
Yeah, it would.
419
00:15:53,561 --> 00:15:57,030
- Let's call her.
- Okay.
420
00:15:57,032 --> 00:15:58,965
[Coughing]
421
00:15:58,967 --> 00:16:02,101
- Are you okay?
[Loudly] - I'm fine, Hank!
422
00:16:02,103 --> 00:16:03,870
[Loudly]
Uh, okay... Jill.
423
00:16:03,872 --> 00:16:05,338
Uh, maybe have a sip of the tea.
424
00:16:05,340 --> 00:16:07,073
- Yeah. Okay.
- Okay.
425
00:16:07,075 --> 00:16:08,074
- Thanks.
- See ya.
426
00:16:14,715 --> 00:16:16,349
Hey, you're the new girl, yeah?
427
00:16:16,351 --> 00:16:18,318
Um, the new P.A., yes. Divya...
428
00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:19,752
I've written discharge papers
for bed four,
429
00:16:19,754 --> 00:16:21,421
but give him a road test first, will you?
430
00:16:21,423 --> 00:16:23,556
Road test?
431
00:16:23,558 --> 00:16:25,058
Make sure he's sober.
432
00:16:25,060 --> 00:16:27,160
Got it. What's going on with him?
433
00:16:27,162 --> 00:16:28,161
Well, for starters,
434
00:16:28,163 --> 00:16:29,395
he's uninsured
435
00:16:29,397 --> 00:16:30,930
and smells like cheap scotch.
436
00:16:30,932 --> 00:16:32,332
He wanted a shot of meperidine,
437
00:16:32,334 --> 00:16:35,301
but I just gave him some antacid
for his gastritis.
438
00:16:35,303 --> 00:16:37,337
Drug seekers are like cats, you know?
439
00:16:37,339 --> 00:16:40,673
You can't feed 'em
or they keep comin' back.
440
00:16:43,143 --> 00:16:44,510
Mr. Lauer, you let me know
441
00:16:44,512 --> 00:16:45,578
if there's anything I can help you with.
442
00:16:45,580 --> 00:16:47,280
Thanks, Bernice. I will.
443
00:16:54,655 --> 00:16:56,422
May I help you?
444
00:16:56,424 --> 00:16:58,558
Um, no. No, actually.
445
00:16:58,560 --> 00:17:01,060
I was just admiring
this, uh, this beautiful horse.
446
00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:02,328
It's spectacular, isn't it?
447
00:17:02,330 --> 00:17:03,329
Mm-hmm.
448
00:17:03,331 --> 00:17:04,864
It was carved in the 19th century.
449
00:17:04,866 --> 00:17:06,432
It was taken from the carousel
450
00:17:06,434 --> 00:17:08,935
that appeared in the film Mary Poppins.
451
00:17:08,937 --> 00:17:10,670
- Really? Mary Poppins?
- Mm-hmm.
452
00:17:10,672 --> 00:17:12,271
The bridle, I think, has been replaced,
453
00:17:12,273 --> 00:17:13,740
but the tail is original horsehair.
454
00:17:13,742 --> 00:17:15,241
Okay, excuse me.
Excuse me for one second.
455
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:17,777
- Sorry.
- Ohh! [Shrieks]
456
00:17:17,779 --> 00:17:18,945
Ohh!
457
00:17:18,947 --> 00:17:21,180
Look what you've done to poor Wilbur.
458
00:17:21,182 --> 00:17:22,715
- Wilbur?
- Oh, my...
459
00:17:22,717 --> 00:17:24,584
- Sorry, Wilbur.
- Um...
460
00:17:24,586 --> 00:17:26,552
- Here, let me just...
- No, no, sir...
461
00:17:26,554 --> 00:17:27,854
no, I can sew... I can shove it back in.
462
00:17:27,856 --> 00:17:29,188
Ju... ju... just stop it!
463
00:17:29,190 --> 00:17:31,257
Just... stop!
464
00:17:34,294 --> 00:17:36,229
Mr. Watkins... how are you?
465
00:17:36,231 --> 00:17:38,965
My head hurts. My stomach hurts.
466
00:17:38,967 --> 00:17:40,133
[Burps]
467
00:17:40,135 --> 00:17:42,201
I got gas shooting out both ends.
468
00:17:42,203 --> 00:17:43,536
Terrific.
469
00:17:43,538 --> 00:17:44,771
I hear that you have been drinking.
470
00:17:44,773 --> 00:17:46,272
Pff! A little.
471
00:17:46,274 --> 00:17:49,409
Hey, if you get away with it
on the job, right?
472
00:17:49,411 --> 00:17:51,310
You mind lifting up your shirt for me?
473
00:17:51,312 --> 00:17:53,980
You'll have to toss me some beads first.
474
00:17:53,982 --> 00:17:58,751
Kidding.
475
00:17:58,753 --> 00:18:00,686
Ahh.
476
00:18:09,830 --> 00:18:10,997
[Inhales sharply]
477
00:18:15,602 --> 00:18:17,069
What? What was that look for?
478
00:18:17,071 --> 00:18:18,337
[Sighs]
It means that your days
479
00:18:18,339 --> 00:18:20,406
of drinking on the job,
among other places,
480
00:18:20,408 --> 00:18:21,674
are over.
481
00:18:23,677 --> 00:18:25,678
The accumulation of fluid in your abdomen
482
00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:27,313
is called ascites.
483
00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:30,183
The paracentesis should
give you some relief.
484
00:18:33,454 --> 00:18:34,487
Whoa.
485
00:18:36,023 --> 00:18:38,224
Look at that.
486
00:18:38,226 --> 00:18:39,992
Jesus turned water into wine,
487
00:18:39,994 --> 00:18:42,195
and I turned whisky into beer.
488
00:18:42,197 --> 00:18:43,429
[Chuckles]
489
00:18:43,431 --> 00:18:48,034
Actually, you turned it
into peritoneal fluid.
490
00:18:48,036 --> 00:18:49,836
Your drinking has damaged your liver
491
00:18:49,838 --> 00:18:51,704
and you need to see a hepatologist.
492
00:18:51,706 --> 00:18:54,207
Still, it looks cool.
493
00:18:54,209 --> 00:18:55,508
Hmm.
494
00:18:58,812 --> 00:19:00,012
What are you doing?
495
00:19:00,014 --> 00:19:01,514
Paracentesis.
496
00:19:01,516 --> 00:19:02,715
I can see that.
497
00:19:02,717 --> 00:19:03,950
Where did you get the ultrasound?
498
00:19:03,952 --> 00:19:05,218
Oh, I grabbed it from down the hall.
499
00:19:05,220 --> 00:19:07,687
It reduces the risk of
intra-abdominal organ injury.
500
00:19:07,689 --> 00:19:09,288
I know what it does,
but you can't just go
501
00:19:09,290 --> 00:19:11,524
grabbing an ultrasound
because you feel like it.
502
00:19:11,526 --> 00:19:13,359
There's protocol.
503
00:19:13,361 --> 00:19:16,028
Does Dr. Van Dyke know you're doing this?
504
00:19:16,030 --> 00:19:17,296
Uh, no.
505
00:19:17,298 --> 00:19:19,031
Oh, impressive.
506
00:19:19,033 --> 00:19:22,034
You're going to get fired
after only two shifts.
507
00:19:29,874 --> 00:19:34,511
Andy?
508
00:19:34,513 --> 00:19:35,812
Andy...
509
00:19:35,814 --> 00:19:37,547
- Yeah.
- Aah!
510
00:19:37,549 --> 00:19:38,548
Look, I know you're a magician,
511
00:19:38,550 --> 00:19:39,549
but do you have to do that?
512
00:19:39,551 --> 00:19:40,984
- Do what?
- Just appear?
513
00:19:40,986 --> 00:19:42,953
I didn't just appear.
I came from the bathroom.
514
00:19:42,955 --> 00:19:44,488
Oh.
515
00:19:44,490 --> 00:19:45,722
Okay.
516
00:19:45,724 --> 00:19:46,890
Well, I have some news.
517
00:19:46,892 --> 00:19:48,692
Your symptoms aren't being caused
518
00:19:48,694 --> 00:19:49,860
by an anxiety disorder.
519
00:19:49,862 --> 00:19:51,828
They're from an elevated thyroid level.
520
00:19:51,830 --> 00:19:53,163
So why do I have that?
521
00:19:53,165 --> 00:19:56,500
If you don't mind...
522
00:19:56,502 --> 00:19:58,135
um... swallow for me.
523
00:19:58,137 --> 00:19:59,302
[Gulp]
524
00:19:59,304 --> 00:20:00,904
There it is.
525
00:20:00,906 --> 00:20:03,240
An adenoma on your thyroid gland.
526
00:20:03,242 --> 00:20:04,674
It's called a hot nodule.
527
00:20:04,676 --> 00:20:06,176
Hmm, terrific.
528
00:20:06,178 --> 00:20:08,011
The one part of me
that's hot's making me sick.
529
00:20:08,013 --> 00:20:09,412
I'm gonna give you some beta blockers.
530
00:20:09,414 --> 00:20:10,914
They need to build up in your system,
531
00:20:10,916 --> 00:20:12,215
but once they do,
532
00:20:12,217 --> 00:20:13,550
you ought to have some short-term relief.
533
00:20:13,552 --> 00:20:14,885
What about long term?
534
00:20:14,887 --> 00:20:17,053
Surgery to remove the adenoma.
535
00:20:17,055 --> 00:20:18,321
It's pretty minor.
536
00:20:18,323 --> 00:20:19,656
And after a few weeks rest,
537
00:20:19,658 --> 00:20:20,857
you'll be good as new.
538
00:20:20,859 --> 00:20:23,860
So I know what's going on with me now.
539
00:20:23,862 --> 00:20:25,595
Ta-da!
540
00:20:25,597 --> 00:20:26,763
- Don't do that.
- What?
541
00:20:26,765 --> 00:20:28,398
Never do "Ta-da".
542
00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:31,168
- Why not?
- It says your magic is weak.
543
00:20:31,170 --> 00:20:32,936
I... I... it speaks for the moment
544
00:20:32,938 --> 00:20:34,671
when the moment should speak for itself.
545
00:20:34,673 --> 00:20:35,705
Ohh.
546
00:20:41,012 --> 00:20:42,379
- Hey.
- Hey.
547
00:20:42,381 --> 00:20:43,814
I thought your shift was over.
548
00:20:43,816 --> 00:20:45,081
It is.
549
00:20:45,083 --> 00:20:47,050
I had some patients to follow up on.
550
00:20:47,052 --> 00:20:48,218
Yeah.
551
00:20:48,220 --> 00:20:49,920
The guy with the ascites you drained...
552
00:20:54,192 --> 00:20:55,792
Did the duty nurse come running in here
553
00:20:55,794 --> 00:20:57,360
like the sky was falling?
554
00:20:57,362 --> 00:20:58,895
No, but...
555
00:20:58,897 --> 00:21:00,096
Honestly, Jill, the way she went on
556
00:21:00,098 --> 00:21:02,232
about protocol.
557
00:21:02,234 --> 00:21:03,667
How I could be fired.
558
00:21:03,669 --> 00:21:05,502
You'd think that I was
somehow killing this man.
559
00:21:05,504 --> 00:21:07,604
Divya.
560
00:21:07,606 --> 00:21:10,640
She was right.
561
00:21:10,642 --> 00:21:12,943
Okay.
562
00:21:12,945 --> 00:21:15,879
Welcome to a hospital.
563
00:21:15,881 --> 00:21:18,548
You can't do things how
you'd want to when you want to.
564
00:21:18,550 --> 00:21:20,116
Hey, Van Dyke barely looked at the guy.
565
00:21:20,118 --> 00:21:21,651
He totally missed the ascites.
566
00:21:21,653 --> 00:21:22,919
I'm not arguing that the patient
567
00:21:22,921 --> 00:21:24,888
didn't need a procedure.
568
00:21:24,890 --> 00:21:26,656
But you should have told Van Dyke first.
569
00:21:26,658 --> 00:21:28,758
It wasn't brain surgery.
570
00:21:28,760 --> 00:21:29,993
It doesn't matter.
571
00:21:29,995 --> 00:21:32,262
Divya, I love having you here,
572
00:21:32,264 --> 00:21:34,297
and I was happy to help you
with this job.
573
00:21:34,299 --> 00:21:36,433
But now, I need you to help me
574
00:21:36,435 --> 00:21:38,134
by following the rules.
575
00:21:38,136 --> 00:21:42,105
Because, while it's nice that
they protect my doctors' egos,
576
00:21:42,107 --> 00:21:44,307
what's really nice...
577
00:21:44,309 --> 00:21:46,643
is they protect the patient's health.
578
00:21:50,481 --> 00:21:52,148
Ahh.
579
00:21:52,150 --> 00:21:53,483
Yeah.
580
00:21:53,485 --> 00:21:55,018
[Exhales]
581
00:21:55,020 --> 00:21:57,854
What the hell is that?
582
00:21:57,856 --> 00:21:59,089
This? What is it?
583
00:21:59,091 --> 00:22:00,590
It's an antique carousel horse.
584
00:22:00,592 --> 00:22:01,925
Hmm.
585
00:22:01,927 --> 00:22:03,293
Originally carved in the 19th century,
586
00:22:03,295 --> 00:22:06,263
it also appeared in the film
Mary Poppins.
587
00:22:10,868 --> 00:22:12,702
And you have it because...
588
00:22:12,704 --> 00:22:13,904
Uh, no reason.
589
00:22:13,906 --> 00:22:15,372
Just don't touch its tail.
590
00:22:15,374 --> 00:22:16,806
Okay.
591
00:22:19,677 --> 00:22:23,413
So, Ev, uh...
592
00:22:23,415 --> 00:22:25,282
you're not gonna believe this.
593
00:22:25,284 --> 00:22:27,517
The Today Show actually called.
594
00:22:27,519 --> 00:22:29,319
They want to interview us.
595
00:22:29,321 --> 00:22:30,587
What?
596
00:22:30,589 --> 00:22:31,688
What?
597
00:22:31,690 --> 00:22:34,124
Hold on.
598
00:22:34,126 --> 00:22:35,458
- What?!
- I know!
599
00:22:35,460 --> 00:22:37,394
Are you kidding me?
600
00:22:37,396 --> 00:22:38,662
Oh, my God!
601
00:22:38,664 --> 00:22:40,397
I told you that DVD was a good idea!
602
00:22:40,399 --> 00:22:41,698
I guess I can't argue.
603
00:22:41,700 --> 00:22:43,133
They'll be here on Friday at 9:30.
604
00:22:43,135 --> 00:22:44,868
[Laughing]
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
605
00:22:44,870 --> 00:22:46,002
Yes!
606
00:22:46,004 --> 00:22:48,271
Oh, my... ohh.
607
00:22:48,273 --> 00:22:52,609
[Cell phone chimes]
608
00:22:52,611 --> 00:22:54,477
[Over speakerphone]
Hey, Hank, it's Andy.
609
00:22:54,479 --> 00:22:56,279
Hey, I just want to say thanks.
610
00:22:56,281 --> 00:22:59,115
These pills already
have me feeling 100% better.
611
00:22:59,117 --> 00:23:01,184
Good, good.
[Car revving over speakerphone]
612
00:23:01,186 --> 00:23:03,053
Okay, I gotta go. Bye.
613
00:23:03,055 --> 00:23:06,289
Man... think I sweat out like ten pounds
614
00:23:06,291 --> 00:23:09,326
lugging that thing in here.
615
00:23:09,328 --> 00:23:11,161
Andy said he always takes a water pill
616
00:23:11,163 --> 00:23:12,562
before an escape.
617
00:23:12,564 --> 00:23:14,230
Water comes in pills?
618
00:23:14,232 --> 00:23:16,533
Dude, I'd swallow, like,
10,000 of those right now.
619
00:23:16,535 --> 00:23:17,867
No, no, water pills are diuretics.
620
00:23:17,869 --> 00:23:19,469
They make your body lose water.
621
00:23:19,471 --> 00:23:21,805
Then I would not swallow any of them.
622
00:23:21,807 --> 00:23:23,707
Evan, do you know where
the Wellerbings live?
623
00:23:23,709 --> 00:23:26,076
Yeah, it's the biggest house
on Georgica Pond.
624
00:23:26,078 --> 00:23:27,644
I've been trying to sign
those guys up with us
625
00:23:27,646 --> 00:23:29,612
since last summer... why?
626
00:23:29,614 --> 00:23:30,981
'Cause I need to get there now.
627
00:23:30,983 --> 00:23:33,083
There's more to Andy's condition
than I realized.
628
00:23:33,085 --> 00:23:34,684
He wasn't paralyzed by fear.
629
00:23:34,686 --> 00:23:36,987
He was paralyzed by paralysis.
630
00:23:36,989 --> 00:23:39,689
[Crowd cheering]
631
00:23:39,691 --> 00:23:41,191
Now, now...
632
00:23:41,193 --> 00:23:44,094
once I am securely locked
inside the crate,
633
00:23:44,096 --> 00:23:46,496
Mr. Wellerbing will crush me
634
00:23:46,498 --> 00:23:48,698
at 60 miles per hour
635
00:23:48,700 --> 00:23:51,468
with his Aston Martin DBS,
636
00:23:51,470 --> 00:23:54,671
one of the most expensive cars
in the world.
637
00:23:54,673 --> 00:23:56,072
Now, Mr. Wellerbing,
638
00:23:56,074 --> 00:23:57,340
you know that if this doesn't go well,
639
00:23:57,342 --> 00:23:59,376
your car could get pretty messed up.
640
00:23:59,378 --> 00:24:00,877
Are you sure you don't want to use
641
00:24:00,879 --> 00:24:02,545
one of those cheap
Lamborghinis that you have?
642
00:24:02,547 --> 00:24:03,747
[Chuckles]
No? All right.
643
00:24:03,749 --> 00:24:04,748
How long do I have?
644
00:24:04,750 --> 00:24:07,217
Zero to 60 in 4.7 seconds.
645
00:24:07,219 --> 00:24:09,252
Mr. Wellerbing,
please take your position.
646
00:24:09,254 --> 00:24:12,555
I need two volunteers. Two volunteers.
647
00:24:12,557 --> 00:24:14,958
Ah, lovely lady in the back,
please come forward.
648
00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:17,594
And you, miss,
would you please step forward?
649
00:24:17,596 --> 00:24:19,529
If you don't mind opening the crate,
650
00:24:19,531 --> 00:24:21,965
I would greatly appreciate it.
[Car revs]
651
00:24:21,967 --> 00:24:23,733
Thank you very much.
652
00:24:23,735 --> 00:24:25,902
Now...
653
00:24:25,904 --> 00:24:28,905
I bid you adieu.
654
00:24:41,619 --> 00:24:42,585
[Car engine revving]
655
00:24:42,587 --> 00:24:43,953
All: Five!
656
00:24:43,955 --> 00:24:45,255
Four!
657
00:24:45,257 --> 00:24:47,090
Three! Two!
658
00:24:47,092 --> 00:24:48,258
- One!
- Stop!
659
00:24:48,260 --> 00:24:50,760
Stop the car!
[Tires screech]
660
00:24:58,135 --> 00:24:59,769
[Cheers and applause]
Whew.
661
00:25:03,941 --> 00:25:05,742
[Clatter]
662
00:25:07,178 --> 00:25:08,912
Oh!
663
00:25:08,914 --> 00:25:10,680
[Cheering continues]
664
00:25:16,353 --> 00:25:18,721
You can't move, can you?
665
00:25:18,723 --> 00:25:19,789
[Weakly]
Ta-da.
666
00:25:23,243 --> 00:25:24,877
You took a water pill, didn't you?
667
00:25:24,879 --> 00:25:26,212
Yeah.
668
00:25:26,214 --> 00:25:27,613
What, now I'm gonna die?
669
00:25:27,615 --> 00:25:30,216
No. This is temporary.
670
00:25:30,218 --> 00:25:33,186
Your hyperthyroidism
combined with the dehydration
671
00:25:33,188 --> 00:25:36,222
from the water pill
dropped your potassium so low,
672
00:25:36,224 --> 00:25:40,727
you went into thyrotoxic
periodic paralysis.
673
00:25:40,729 --> 00:25:42,228
So all those times I was feeling weak,
674
00:25:42,230 --> 00:25:43,696
is this what was happening then too?
675
00:25:43,698 --> 00:25:45,765
If I were a betting man,
I'd put money on it.
676
00:25:45,767 --> 00:25:47,967
And didn't I tell you to stay
away from confinement tricks?
677
00:25:47,969 --> 00:25:49,936
[Sighs]
678
00:25:49,938 --> 00:25:52,438
Magic is my life, Hank.
679
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:56,309
I can't go back to selling
corrective insoles.
680
00:25:56,311 --> 00:25:58,144
Damn it!
681
00:25:58,146 --> 00:26:00,346
All that planning, all that rehearsal.
682
00:26:00,348 --> 00:26:01,347
And I blew it.
683
00:26:01,349 --> 00:26:02,515
What? Are you kidding me?
684
00:26:02,517 --> 00:26:04,083
You did it half-paralyzed.
685
00:26:04,085 --> 00:26:05,918
I mean, that's...
that's even more amazing.
686
00:26:05,920 --> 00:26:07,120
No. No.
687
00:26:07,122 --> 00:26:08,087
It didn't go as planned.
688
00:26:08,089 --> 00:26:09,288
There was no big finish.
689
00:26:09,290 --> 00:26:10,623
Just a bunch of broken glasses
690
00:26:10,625 --> 00:26:11,858
and people that think I'm pathetic.
691
00:26:11,860 --> 00:26:13,359
Oh, my God, I swear to God.
692
00:26:13,361 --> 00:26:14,827
This is like high school again.
693
00:26:14,829 --> 00:26:17,230
A... actually, in that waiter's outfit,
694
00:26:17,232 --> 00:26:20,032
I don't think most people here
even know it's you.
695
00:26:20,034 --> 00:26:21,134
Thank you.
696
00:26:22,636 --> 00:26:24,871
You're honey and plastic wrap, right?
697
00:26:24,873 --> 00:26:26,539
Actually, I go by Betty.
698
00:26:26,541 --> 00:26:28,040
[Chuckles]
699
00:26:28,042 --> 00:26:30,276
I've worked a lot of the same
parties out here as you,
700
00:26:30,278 --> 00:26:33,079
and that was the coolest
illusion I've ever seen.
701
00:26:33,081 --> 00:26:35,948
And not just of yours. Of... of anyone's.
702
00:26:37,217 --> 00:26:39,152
Thanks, Betty.
703
00:26:39,154 --> 00:26:40,186
I'm Andy.
704
00:26:41,955 --> 00:26:45,992
I'd shake your hand, but I'm
kind of paralyzed right now.
705
00:26:45,994 --> 00:26:47,727
Are you sure this is gonna wear off?
706
00:26:47,729 --> 00:26:50,329
Positive.
707
00:26:51,365 --> 00:26:52,565
Oh, I'm so sorry.
708
00:26:52,567 --> 00:26:53,633
I did not know that you were busy.
709
00:26:53,635 --> 00:26:55,368
I'm not. Close the curtain.
710
00:27:01,375 --> 00:27:02,775
You asked to see me?
711
00:27:02,777 --> 00:27:04,010
How are your eyes?
712
00:27:04,012 --> 00:27:05,545
- Good.
- Not you, Danny.
713
00:27:05,547 --> 00:27:06,913
They're fine.
714
00:27:06,915 --> 00:27:08,281
Top of this patient's chart,
715
00:27:08,283 --> 00:27:11,317
what does it say
next to the word "physician"?
716
00:27:11,319 --> 00:27:13,386
It says "Van Dyke."
717
00:27:13,388 --> 00:27:14,987
Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
718
00:27:14,989 --> 00:27:16,756
Dr. Van Dyke, I wasn't trying
to flout your authority.
719
00:27:16,758 --> 00:27:18,191
- I was merely...
- Okay, this isn't a discussion.
720
00:27:18,193 --> 00:27:21,060
So I don't need explanations, apologies,
721
00:27:21,062 --> 00:27:22,528
or excuses.
722
00:27:22,530 --> 00:27:24,297
You thought I missed
the ascites, didn't you?
723
00:27:24,299 --> 00:27:25,932
- Yes.
- Well...
724
00:27:25,934 --> 00:27:27,500
his presentation didn't warrant
725
00:27:27,502 --> 00:27:30,069
immediate paracentesis.
726
00:27:30,071 --> 00:27:32,104
What he needed was
a trip to the free clinic.
727
00:27:32,106 --> 00:27:34,373
So... next time you get the urge
728
00:27:34,375 --> 00:27:37,109
to go sticking needles into my patients,
729
00:27:37,111 --> 00:27:38,778
consult me first.
730
00:27:38,780 --> 00:27:41,347
I will.
731
00:27:41,349 --> 00:27:44,417
Now... breaches of protocol aside,
732
00:27:44,419 --> 00:27:46,519
his peritoneal fluid
came back from the lab
733
00:27:46,521 --> 00:27:48,054
positive for SBP.
734
00:27:48,056 --> 00:27:50,289
Spontaneous bacterial peritonitis.
735
00:27:50,291 --> 00:27:51,924
He's been admitted.
736
00:27:51,926 --> 00:27:54,126
Turns out, you probably saved his life.
737
00:27:54,128 --> 00:27:56,128
Or, since my name's on his chart,
738
00:27:56,130 --> 00:27:57,530
I did.
739
00:27:57,532 --> 00:27:58,698
Danny, stop wiggling,
740
00:27:58,700 --> 00:28:00,433
unless you want a crooked eyebrow.
741
00:28:01,535 --> 00:28:04,003
So...
742
00:28:04,005 --> 00:28:06,873
in spite of the ass-backward
way you went about it,
743
00:28:06,875 --> 00:28:11,177
you made me look good,
and I'd like to say thank you.
744
00:28:11,179 --> 00:28:12,445
Well, you are welcome...
745
00:28:12,447 --> 00:28:13,913
I'd like to say thank you...
746
00:28:13,915 --> 00:28:16,482
by buying you dinner.
747
00:28:16,484 --> 00:28:17,717
So...
748
00:28:17,719 --> 00:28:21,020
I'll let you know where and when.
749
00:28:23,457 --> 00:28:24,824
You can go now.
750
00:28:24,826 --> 00:28:28,060
Not you, Danny.
751
00:28:30,964 --> 00:28:34,100
Almost done.
752
00:28:40,274 --> 00:28:41,474
[Crash]
Whoa!
753
00:28:41,476 --> 00:28:44,343
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- Oh, my...
754
00:28:44,345 --> 00:28:45,511
It's you.
755
00:28:45,513 --> 00:28:46,946
Yeah, it's me.
756
00:28:46,948 --> 00:28:48,948
Ben Affleck.
757
00:28:48,950 --> 00:28:50,349
Oh!
758
00:28:50,351 --> 00:28:52,585
Isn't that crazy how... how, sometimes,
759
00:28:52,587 --> 00:28:53,886
when you stop looking for something,
760
00:28:53,888 --> 00:28:55,588
it just pops up in front of you?
761
00:28:55,590 --> 00:28:56,789
I guess.
762
00:28:56,791 --> 00:28:57,757
Right now, I'm just looking
763
00:28:57,759 --> 00:28:59,358
for a little cowboy rub.
764
00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:01,060
You're looking for what?
765
00:29:01,062 --> 00:29:02,161
Yeah, that sounded weird.
766
00:29:02,163 --> 00:29:03,729
It's, um, it's a spice blend.
767
00:29:03,731 --> 00:29:06,732
I like it on my meat.
768
00:29:06,734 --> 00:29:08,534
That sounded weird too.
769
00:29:08,536 --> 00:29:10,369
It's, uh... look.
770
00:29:10,371 --> 00:29:12,171
Grilly Man Cowboy Rub.
771
00:29:12,173 --> 00:29:13,172
See? Not weird.
772
00:29:13,174 --> 00:29:14,740
Cool.
773
00:29:14,742 --> 00:29:16,309
So I'm... I'm really looking forward
774
00:29:16,311 --> 00:29:18,678
- to our interview on Friday.
- What?
775
00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:19,912
Um, our...
776
00:29:19,914 --> 00:29:21,480
oh, do you not recognize me?
777
00:29:21,482 --> 00:29:24,016
I'm Evan R. Lawson, the CFO
of Hankmed, from the DVD.
778
00:29:24,018 --> 00:29:27,086
My brother and I, we're talking
on the show on Friday, 9:30.
779
00:29:27,088 --> 00:29:28,854
He's the former E.R. doctor
780
00:29:28,856 --> 00:29:30,323
turned house call physician to the rich
781
00:29:30,325 --> 00:29:31,657
and not-so-rich.
782
00:29:31,659 --> 00:29:32,725
Wait a minute.
783
00:29:32,727 --> 00:29:34,260
Did you watch the DVD?
784
00:29:34,262 --> 00:29:35,661
Can I be honest with you?
785
00:29:35,663 --> 00:29:37,697
I don't have a clue
what you're talking about.
786
00:29:37,699 --> 00:29:39,599
We don't have
a doctor interview on Friday.
787
00:29:39,601 --> 00:29:40,967
This is baby animal week.
788
00:29:40,969 --> 00:29:44,537
Al got the polar bears. I got turtles.
789
00:29:44,539 --> 00:29:46,806
Ooh, turtles. That sucks, for both of us.
790
00:29:46,808 --> 00:29:48,874
Listen, Matt... can I call you Matt?
791
00:29:48,876 --> 00:29:51,110
- No.
- Mr. Lauer...
792
00:29:51,112 --> 00:29:52,445
you wanna get out of this turtle thing?
793
00:29:52,447 --> 00:29:53,813
I have a perfect replacement
794
00:29:53,815 --> 00:29:55,681
that not only fits
into your occasional series
795
00:29:55,683 --> 00:29:57,550
on the changing face
of health care in America,
796
00:29:57,552 --> 00:29:59,518
but also features home video
797
00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:01,854
of a brutal, multi-car accident
798
00:30:01,856 --> 00:30:05,191
with a daring medical rescue at the end.
799
00:30:05,193 --> 00:30:06,459
Evan, right?
800
00:30:06,461 --> 00:30:08,260
Yes.
801
00:30:08,262 --> 00:30:09,795
Evan, take a walk with me.
802
00:30:09,797 --> 00:30:12,331
I need a little sugar.
803
00:30:12,333 --> 00:30:15,301
Why does that keep happening?
804
00:30:25,345 --> 00:30:28,047
I understand you've
regained some memories
805
00:30:28,049 --> 00:30:29,782
from the night of the accident.
806
00:30:29,784 --> 00:30:30,816
I have.
807
00:30:30,818 --> 00:30:32,451
At the time,
808
00:30:32,453 --> 00:30:34,220
I recalled smelling cigarette smoke.
809
00:30:34,222 --> 00:30:36,355
So there was someone else there.
810
00:30:36,357 --> 00:30:38,557
The driver who fled, presumably?
811
00:30:38,559 --> 00:30:40,059
Mm, a second person.
812
00:30:40,061 --> 00:30:42,361
- You saw them?
- No.
813
00:30:42,363 --> 00:30:44,897
But I heard something that would
only really make sense
814
00:30:44,899 --> 00:30:46,899
if one person were talking to another.
815
00:30:46,901 --> 00:30:48,167
Which was?
816
00:30:48,169 --> 00:30:49,502
Das ist die nicht.
817
00:30:49,504 --> 00:30:52,772
"Das ist sie nicht"?
818
00:30:52,774 --> 00:30:54,240
"It's not her."
819
00:30:54,242 --> 00:30:56,575
So whoever that was was expecting to find
820
00:30:56,577 --> 00:30:58,044
someone else in your car.
821
00:30:58,046 --> 00:31:00,312
Hmm.
822
00:31:00,314 --> 00:31:01,347
So your theory, then,
823
00:31:01,349 --> 00:31:02,848
is that these persons
824
00:31:02,850 --> 00:31:04,383
deliberately created an accident
825
00:31:04,385 --> 00:31:05,785
to get to Marisa?
826
00:31:05,787 --> 00:31:07,687
Yes.
827
00:31:07,689 --> 00:31:09,422
The smoke you smelled,
828
00:31:09,424 --> 00:31:11,257
could it not have been a damaged engine?
829
00:31:11,259 --> 00:31:13,292
I don't think so, but...
830
00:31:13,294 --> 00:31:14,760
What does your therapist
say about all of this?
831
00:31:16,997 --> 00:31:18,764
You know I'm seeing a therapist?
832
00:31:18,766 --> 00:31:21,100
You're a member of the medical community.
833
00:31:21,102 --> 00:31:23,436
You sustained head trauma. I assumed.
834
00:31:25,238 --> 00:31:26,372
Right.
835
00:31:29,242 --> 00:31:31,277
I'm sorry, what did you ask?
836
00:31:31,279 --> 00:31:33,746
If your therapist feels
these are memories
837
00:31:33,748 --> 00:31:36,582
rather than fabrications?
838
00:31:36,584 --> 00:31:40,119
Are you saying that you think
that I'm imagining all of this?
839
00:31:40,121 --> 00:31:41,420
Well, I think...
840
00:31:41,422 --> 00:31:45,825
our minds seek to order
and explain our experiences...
841
00:31:45,827 --> 00:31:48,194
to give reason to events
842
00:31:48,196 --> 00:31:50,396
which otherwise would seem
random and meaningless.
843
00:31:50,398 --> 00:31:52,298
Well, if that's the case,
844
00:31:52,300 --> 00:31:54,867
then I have wasted your time
and the police's.
845
00:31:54,869 --> 00:31:56,902
The police?
846
00:31:56,904 --> 00:32:00,239
What did they think of your theory?
847
00:32:00,241 --> 00:32:02,942
They said they'd look into it.
848
00:32:04,611 --> 00:32:06,746
- Boris, I'm sorry if I've...
- Please, don't be.
849
00:32:06,748 --> 00:32:10,349
You were concerned
for someone else's safety.
850
00:32:10,351 --> 00:32:12,852
To allay any lingering fears you my have,
851
00:32:12,854 --> 00:32:15,621
I'll share your concern
with Galil, my security chief.
852
00:32:15,623 --> 00:32:18,824
Okay.
853
00:32:18,826 --> 00:32:20,259
Thank you for your time.
854
00:32:20,261 --> 00:32:21,460
Of course.
855
00:32:27,100 --> 00:32:28,300
Take care of yourself.
856
00:32:28,302 --> 00:32:30,503
[Softly]
Thank you.
857
00:32:31,872 --> 00:32:33,339
Dieter.
858
00:32:33,341 --> 00:32:35,007
Find Marisa, find my son,
859
00:32:35,009 --> 00:32:36,442
and get me Galil.
860
00:32:36,444 --> 00:32:38,010
[Speaks german]
861
00:32:48,321 --> 00:32:50,322
[Glass clanks on table]
862
00:32:55,595 --> 00:32:58,130
Andy?
863
00:32:58,132 --> 00:33:00,166
[Rattling]
864
00:33:01,234 --> 00:33:02,735
Hang on, Andy!
865
00:33:02,737 --> 00:33:04,603
I'm gonna open the safety latch!
866
00:33:04,605 --> 00:33:05,771
[Muffled]
Hank! Just...
867
00:33:05,773 --> 00:33:07,173
- Hank!
- Calm down!
868
00:33:07,175 --> 00:33:08,874
What are you... what are you doing here?
869
00:33:08,876 --> 00:33:11,243
Oh... you're okay.
870
00:33:11,245 --> 00:33:12,678
Yeah.
871
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:13,913
I... I was in the neighborhood.
872
00:33:13,915 --> 00:33:14,880
I thought I'd check up on you,
873
00:33:14,882 --> 00:33:16,081
take your blood pressure,
874
00:33:16,083 --> 00:33:17,349
see how the medication's working.
875
00:33:17,351 --> 00:33:18,684
Yeah, great, great.
876
00:33:18,686 --> 00:33:19,819
I'm fine.
877
00:33:19,821 --> 00:33:22,121
Good, so no attacks, no cramping,
878
00:33:22,123 --> 00:33:23,656
no heart issues?
879
00:33:23,658 --> 00:33:24,957
Nope. Nope.
880
00:33:24,959 --> 00:33:26,358
Okay, what about muscle weakness?
881
00:33:26,360 --> 00:33:30,162
Uh...
[Woman giggles]
882
00:33:30,164 --> 00:33:31,630
Is there another person in there?
883
00:33:31,632 --> 00:33:33,032
No.
884
00:33:33,034 --> 00:33:34,700
[Both laugh]
No, I...
885
00:33:34,702 --> 00:33:37,136
I do a little, uh, ventriloquism.
886
00:33:37,138 --> 00:33:38,737
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
887
00:33:38,739 --> 00:33:40,139
No, he doesn't.
888
00:33:40,141 --> 00:33:42,208
Oh! Hello.
889
00:33:42,210 --> 00:33:43,809
[Giggling] - Hi.
- Betty, right?
890
00:33:43,811 --> 00:33:46,378
Right, uh, Betty's my new assistant.
891
00:33:46,380 --> 00:33:49,014
I figured if I ever got trapped again,
892
00:33:49,016 --> 00:33:49,982
it would be good to have one.
893
00:33:49,984 --> 00:33:51,584
You know, for safety.
894
00:33:51,586 --> 00:33:52,885
- Right!
- Right.
895
00:33:52,887 --> 00:33:54,653
Although, in that instance,
896
00:33:54,655 --> 00:33:56,889
one of you might want to stay
outside the crate.
897
00:33:56,891 --> 00:33:57,957
You know, for safety.
898
00:33:57,959 --> 00:33:59,058
Yeah! Good idea.
899
00:33:59,060 --> 00:34:00,192
[Laughing]
Yeah.
900
00:34:00,194 --> 00:34:01,760
Okay.
[All laughing]
901
00:34:09,736 --> 00:34:11,804
[Humming]
Where have you been?
902
00:34:11,806 --> 00:34:12,872
I got you up over an hour ago.
903
00:34:12,874 --> 00:34:13,939
What are you doing?
904
00:34:13,941 --> 00:34:15,374
Just tell me you read the note cards
905
00:34:15,376 --> 00:34:16,442
I left on your desk.
906
00:34:16,444 --> 00:34:17,509
Of course I read them.
907
00:34:17,511 --> 00:34:19,411
- I need coffee.
- Good, get it.
908
00:34:19,413 --> 00:34:22,147
Dr. Lawson, Noelle Cook,
segment producer.
909
00:34:22,149 --> 00:34:23,449
Here's coffee.
910
00:34:23,451 --> 00:34:24,850
Let's get you miked and powdered.
911
00:34:24,852 --> 00:34:26,318
Uh, wow. Thank you.
912
00:34:26,320 --> 00:34:28,087
Everyone looks so professional
913
00:34:28,089 --> 00:34:29,788
and so old.
914
00:34:29,790 --> 00:34:32,358
[Chuckles]
And good morning to you too.
915
00:34:32,360 --> 00:34:33,459
No, no, no. No, I'm sorry.
916
00:34:33,461 --> 00:34:35,561
I just meant, uh...
917
00:34:35,563 --> 00:34:38,130
[Mumbling indistinctly]
918
00:34:38,132 --> 00:34:40,332
Oh, never mind.
Right, right. That was great.
919
00:34:40,334 --> 00:34:42,501
Hey Noelle, uh, should I have
worn a tie, do you think?
920
00:34:42,503 --> 00:34:44,203
Would that have said CFO more?
921
00:34:44,205 --> 00:34:46,105
I'm sure you'll say it plenty
without a tie.
922
00:34:46,107 --> 00:34:47,539
- That's... heh.
- You're up next.
923
00:34:47,541 --> 00:34:49,108
So take a seat.
924
00:34:49,110 --> 00:34:50,776
Just relax.
925
00:34:50,778 --> 00:34:52,011
- Yeah.
- Have fun.
926
00:34:52,013 --> 00:34:53,145
- Yes, fun.
- You'll be great.
927
00:34:53,147 --> 00:34:55,514
That's great. Okay, uh...
928
00:34:55,516 --> 00:34:57,716
Let's do this.
929
00:34:57,718 --> 00:34:59,318
♪ The Today Show ♪
930
00:35:00,720 --> 00:35:02,121
Ahh!
931
00:35:06,359 --> 00:35:07,359
Mm!
932
00:35:09,329 --> 00:35:10,329
These guys are brothers.
933
00:35:10,331 --> 00:35:11,664
Is that it? Okay.
934
00:35:11,666 --> 00:35:13,499
Which town are they in?
935
00:35:13,501 --> 00:35:14,934
Evan, that's The Today Show.
936
00:35:14,936 --> 00:35:16,735
- Thank you.
- Yes, Hank.
937
00:35:16,737 --> 00:35:18,037
Yes, it is.
938
00:35:18,039 --> 00:35:20,272
But... how... how... what... what...
939
00:35:20,274 --> 00:35:21,674
what's going on?
940
00:35:21,676 --> 00:35:23,542
Uh, you mean why
is The Today Show actually here
941
00:35:23,544 --> 00:35:25,711
as opposed to some slipshod
prank you cooked up?
942
00:35:25,713 --> 00:35:27,546
Yes.
943
00:35:27,548 --> 00:35:29,081
Funny story about that.
944
00:35:29,083 --> 00:35:31,784
I, uh, I ran into Matt Lauer
at Citarella.
945
00:35:31,786 --> 00:35:34,687
And we got to talking about the DVD
946
00:35:34,689 --> 00:35:36,488
and the Jitney crash,
947
00:35:36,490 --> 00:35:39,391
and I realized that you
were totally shining me on.
948
00:35:39,393 --> 00:35:42,027
Fortunately, Matt enjoys
a good practical joke,
949
00:35:42,029 --> 00:35:43,996
also thought that we'd
make a good interview.
950
00:35:43,998 --> 00:35:46,532
Thus allowing me not only
to promote our business,
951
00:35:46,534 --> 00:35:49,401
but also to exact my revenge upon you.
952
00:35:49,403 --> 00:35:52,037
- Heh.
- So two birds...
953
00:35:52,039 --> 00:35:55,841
One Today Show sized stone.
954
00:35:55,843 --> 00:35:57,042
[Gulps]
955
00:35:57,044 --> 00:35:58,544
I don't like this.
956
00:35:58,546 --> 00:36:01,080
And we're on in five...
957
00:36:01,082 --> 00:36:02,381
- All right.
- Four...
958
00:36:02,383 --> 00:36:03,882
Three...
959
00:36:06,653 --> 00:36:09,021
We're joined now by Hank and Evan Lawson,
960
00:36:09,023 --> 00:36:10,356
two brothers from Passaic, New Jersey,
961
00:36:10,358 --> 00:36:13,092
who run a concierge medical practice
962
00:36:13,094 --> 00:36:14,393
out in the exclusive Hamptons.
963
00:36:14,395 --> 00:36:15,894
Guys, good morning to both of you.
964
00:36:15,896 --> 00:36:17,096
Good morning to you, Matt!
965
00:36:17,098 --> 00:36:18,597
Uh, thanks a lot for having us.
966
00:36:18,599 --> 00:36:19,999
Yes, for having us.
967
00:36:20,001 --> 00:36:21,433
Well, thanks for being here.
968
00:36:21,435 --> 00:36:23,869
So tell us exactly
what is a concierge doctor?
969
00:36:23,871 --> 00:36:25,404
Ah, yes.
970
00:36:25,406 --> 00:36:28,007
Uh, concierge...
971
00:36:28,009 --> 00:36:29,641
- Camera's right there.
- Camera's right there.
972
00:36:29,643 --> 00:36:33,412
Uh, doctors, are, by and large, people.
973
00:36:33,414 --> 00:36:35,514
Basically, it's a private
medical practice in which...
974
00:36:35,516 --> 00:36:36,715
It's a private medical practice.
975
00:36:36,717 --> 00:36:37,816
- ...uh, we come to you...
- Come to you...
976
00:36:37,818 --> 00:36:39,585
...whenever and wherever you need us.
977
00:36:39,587 --> 00:36:41,220
Wherever you need us. You need us.
978
00:36:41,222 --> 00:36:43,622
Let's go to some recent footage, guys.
979
00:36:43,624 --> 00:36:45,758
This is you two in action,
980
00:36:45,760 --> 00:36:47,726
and you're responding
to a traffic accident out there.
981
00:36:47,728 --> 00:36:49,061
Let's take a look.
982
00:36:49,063 --> 00:36:50,095
- Good.
- Very good.
983
00:36:50,097 --> 00:36:53,632
That's good.
984
00:36:53,634 --> 00:36:54,666
- I can't do this.
- Yes, you...
985
00:36:54,668 --> 00:36:56,035
you agreed to do this.
986
00:36:56,037 --> 00:36:57,669
Yeah, because I never
thought it would happen.
987
00:36:57,671 --> 00:36:58,704
I... I don't know what to say.
988
00:36:58,706 --> 00:37:00,005
Just stick to the talking points.
989
00:37:00,007 --> 00:37:01,106
What talking points?
990
00:37:01,108 --> 00:37:02,908
- On the note cards you read.
- I...
991
00:37:02,910 --> 00:37:04,877
- That you didn't read.
- No.
992
00:37:04,879 --> 00:37:06,245
- Here, take mine.
- Okay.
993
00:37:06,247 --> 00:37:07,279
Read them really quick, right here.
994
00:37:07,281 --> 00:37:09,248
Just read some right now.
995
00:37:09,250 --> 00:37:10,315
Just memorize a couple of them.
996
00:37:10,317 --> 00:37:11,483
- Okay.
- Please, quick.
997
00:37:11,485 --> 00:37:13,485
We have become... we're... okay.
998
00:37:13,487 --> 00:37:16,121
It's ok... it's fine.
Just take a deep breath.
999
00:37:16,123 --> 00:37:17,956
- Hank, it's okay, all right?
- Okay.
1000
00:37:17,958 --> 00:37:20,526
- Okay. Okay.
- It's all right.
1001
00:37:20,528 --> 00:37:23,095
That, I have to say,
is, uh, pretty impressive stuff.
1002
00:37:23,097 --> 00:37:24,663
So, Dr. Lawson, let me ask you,
1003
00:37:24,665 --> 00:37:28,267
how would you say your life
has changed since then?
1004
00:37:28,269 --> 00:37:29,535
It cha... well, um...
1005
00:37:29,537 --> 00:37:30,636
[whispering]
Just read the cards.
1006
00:37:30,638 --> 00:37:31,937
- How did that, uh...
- Just read.
1007
00:37:31,939 --> 00:37:33,505
- These... I don't know.
- Just say something.
1008
00:37:33,507 --> 00:37:35,674
Uh, there... there... uh...
1009
00:37:35,676 --> 00:37:37,676
- Ah, umm. Aaah.
- You know, Matt,
1010
00:37:37,678 --> 00:37:39,211
the business has definitely changed.
1011
00:37:39,213 --> 00:37:40,879
We haven't changed that much at all.
1012
00:37:40,881 --> 00:37:43,348
We're still the same patient-focused
1013
00:37:43,350 --> 00:37:45,217
private practice that we've always been.
1014
00:37:45,219 --> 00:37:46,885
- ...Private practice that we've always been.
- And... and we're just...
1015
00:37:46,887 --> 00:37:48,687
- we're more popular.
- Yeah, we're more popular.
1016
00:37:48,689 --> 00:37:50,355
- Yeah.
- More popular.
1017
00:37:50,357 --> 00:37:52,891
In a day, an age when we go to the doctor
1018
00:37:52,893 --> 00:37:56,128
and sometimes we feel
more like numbers than people,
1019
00:37:56,130 --> 00:37:58,297
I have to say it's nice
to see that you guys
1020
00:37:58,299 --> 00:38:00,532
are flipping that on its head.
1021
00:38:00,534 --> 00:38:01,900
- We are. We are. We are.
- Yeah.
1022
00:38:01,902 --> 00:38:04,903
And, you know what?
We're really flipping...
1023
00:38:04,905 --> 00:38:06,105
good.
1024
00:38:06,107 --> 00:38:07,906
Yeah, we're f... flipping good.
1025
00:38:07,908 --> 00:38:09,641
That sounds like a new catchphrase.
1026
00:38:09,643 --> 00:38:12,010
So, um, Hank and Evan,
we'll stop it there.
1027
00:38:12,012 --> 00:38:13,212
Thank you for joining us.
1028
00:38:13,214 --> 00:38:15,180
- Thank you.
- Thank you, Brian.
1029
00:38:15,182 --> 00:38:17,649
[Sighs]
And we're clear.
1030
00:38:19,319 --> 00:38:20,352
Who's Brian?
1031
00:38:20,354 --> 00:38:21,620
That's Brian.
1032
00:38:21,622 --> 00:38:22,921
Hank, no, that's Matt Lauer!
1033
00:38:22,923 --> 00:38:24,389
[Whimpers]
That's Matt Lauer.
1034
00:38:24,391 --> 00:38:25,491
Hank, what the...
what... what just happened?
1035
00:38:25,493 --> 00:38:27,025
I don't know! I got... so I got...
1036
00:38:27,027 --> 00:38:29,261
I got a little...
I got a little... nervous.
1037
00:38:29,263 --> 00:38:31,330
You got a little ner... look at you!
1038
00:38:31,332 --> 00:38:32,564
Dude, you're melting!
1039
00:38:32,566 --> 00:38:33,866
Yeah, maybe that's because
you just sprang
1040
00:38:33,868 --> 00:38:36,902
a nationally televised
live interview on me!
1041
00:38:36,904 --> 00:38:38,837
Oh, that... that wasn't live.
1042
00:38:38,839 --> 00:38:41,573
We were pre-taping to use
at some point in the future.
1043
00:38:41,575 --> 00:38:42,774
- What?
- What? Wait, wait.
1044
00:38:42,776 --> 00:38:43,642
So no one... no one saw that.
1045
00:38:43,644 --> 00:38:44,977
Nope!
1046
00:38:44,979 --> 00:38:46,145
And to be totally honest with you,
1047
00:38:46,147 --> 00:38:48,113
I'm not super-sure that anyone ever will.
1048
00:38:57,056 --> 00:38:58,390
[Softly]
You promise?
1049
00:39:07,376 --> 00:39:13,081
Okay, so at the risk
of stealing your motto...
1050
00:39:13,083 --> 00:39:15,016
I have a confession to make.
1051
00:39:15,018 --> 00:39:16,551
[Crunching]
1052
00:39:16,553 --> 00:39:18,920
I am terrified of public speaking.
1053
00:39:18,922 --> 00:39:20,589
You don't say?
1054
00:39:20,591 --> 00:39:23,058
Ever since my ninth grade
production of The Wizard Of Oz.
1055
00:39:23,060 --> 00:39:24,626
Oh, when you played the scarecrow.
1056
00:39:24,628 --> 00:39:25,694
And forgot all the words
1057
00:39:25,696 --> 00:39:27,195
to If I Only Had A Brain.
1058
00:39:27,197 --> 00:39:28,330
Yes, I remember that.
1059
00:39:28,332 --> 00:39:29,564
I do. It was very ironic.
1060
00:39:29,566 --> 00:39:30,732
It's hard to imagine something
1061
00:39:30,734 --> 00:39:32,534
more embarrassing than that.
1062
00:39:32,536 --> 00:39:34,269
[Crunching]
These pretzels are so good.
1063
00:39:34,271 --> 00:39:35,270
I told you.
1064
00:39:35,272 --> 00:39:37,539
So can we just...
1065
00:39:37,541 --> 00:39:38,740
get something straight.
1066
00:39:38,742 --> 00:39:41,243
Just wanna understand something.
1067
00:39:41,245 --> 00:39:43,678
Cutting people open... that's easy.
1068
00:39:43,680 --> 00:39:45,113
Right?
1069
00:39:45,115 --> 00:39:49,484
Talking... scary to the point of
1070
00:39:49,486 --> 00:39:51,119
sweating out half your body weight?
1071
00:39:51,121 --> 00:39:52,988
What can I say?
1072
00:39:52,990 --> 00:39:54,422
I'm more at home one on one
1073
00:39:54,424 --> 00:39:55,757
than I am in front of an audience.
1074
00:39:55,759 --> 00:39:57,158
You're being really honest about it.
1075
00:39:57,160 --> 00:39:59,227
It's making it really hard
for me to gloat.
1076
00:39:59,229 --> 00:40:02,130
Just please, don't ever
make me do that again.
1077
00:40:02,132 --> 00:40:03,965
Believe me, had I known,
1078
00:40:03,967 --> 00:40:06,401
it never would have happened.
1079
00:40:06,403 --> 00:40:07,736
Really?
1080
00:40:07,738 --> 00:40:09,738
You'd have passed up The Today Show?
1081
00:40:09,740 --> 00:40:11,573
What? No, I wouldn't have passed it up.
1082
00:40:11,575 --> 00:40:13,074
I just wouldn't have allowed you
1083
00:40:13,076 --> 00:40:15,143
and your amazing waterfall
armpits near the camera.
1084
00:40:15,145 --> 00:40:16,177
That's all.
1085
00:40:16,179 --> 00:40:17,746
Look, I only agreed to do it
1086
00:40:17,748 --> 00:40:20,282
because I never believed
you could make it happen.
1087
00:40:20,284 --> 00:40:22,217
Yeah, you pretty much
don't believe anything
1088
00:40:22,219 --> 00:40:25,854
I say I can do.
1089
00:40:25,856 --> 00:40:29,090
It's funny.
1090
00:40:31,994 --> 00:40:34,763
You're right.
1091
00:40:34,765 --> 00:40:36,064
Hmm?
1092
00:40:36,066 --> 00:40:38,767
You're right.
1093
00:40:38,769 --> 00:40:41,836
You talk and I roll my eyes
1094
00:40:41,838 --> 00:40:44,005
at your ideas, your dreams,
1095
00:40:44,007 --> 00:40:45,707
and your schemes,
1096
00:40:45,709 --> 00:40:47,542
just because they're yours
and I think you're crazy.
1097
00:40:47,544 --> 00:40:49,077
Hmm.
1098
00:40:49,079 --> 00:40:51,913
Only now I realize you're not just crazy,
1099
00:40:51,915 --> 00:40:54,683
you're fearless.
1100
00:40:54,685 --> 00:40:56,818
I just don't give up
when I know what I want.
1101
00:40:56,820 --> 00:40:59,854
Not the first time, anyway.
1102
00:40:59,856 --> 00:41:02,824
Which is why, in spite
of your objections, Henry,
1103
00:41:02,826 --> 00:41:07,162
Hankmed must expand.
1104
00:41:07,164 --> 00:41:09,931
Look, I know that's your plan.
1105
00:41:09,933 --> 00:41:12,300
But what if it's not my plan?
1106
00:41:12,302 --> 00:41:14,035
What if I'm comfortable
the way things are?
1107
00:41:14,037 --> 00:41:15,403
Um, the way I remember it,
1108
00:41:15,405 --> 00:41:16,905
you were comfortable back in Brooklyn
1109
00:41:16,907 --> 00:41:18,106
in your boxer shorts,
1110
00:41:18,108 --> 00:41:19,641
watching Jerry Springer reruns,
1111
00:41:19,643 --> 00:41:21,743
drinking beer at 10:00 in the morning.
1112
00:41:21,745 --> 00:41:24,980
You sure as heck didn't plan to
be a concierge doctor, either.
1113
00:41:24,982 --> 00:41:27,682
Or to live here.
1114
00:41:27,684 --> 00:41:29,718
Or to call it Hankmed, even.
1115
00:41:29,720 --> 00:41:32,020
That was all me, Henry.
1116
00:41:32,022 --> 00:41:35,256
That's true.
1117
00:41:35,258 --> 00:41:36,992
Okay. Okay.
1118
00:41:36,994 --> 00:41:38,226
This round goes to you.
1119
00:41:38,228 --> 00:41:39,394
Hmm.
1120
00:41:39,396 --> 00:41:41,529
But...
1121
00:41:41,531 --> 00:41:42,964
our battle isn't over.
1122
00:41:44,166 --> 00:41:45,667
Bring it.
1123
00:41:45,669 --> 00:41:48,503
You're not turning this
into "McMedicine."
1124
00:41:48,505 --> 00:41:49,537
Fine.
1125
00:41:49,539 --> 00:41:50,839
How 'bout Medbucks?
1126
00:41:50,841 --> 00:41:53,041
- Okay.
- Hank-Mart? Doc In The Box?
1127
00:41:53,043 --> 00:41:56,277
Look, Henr... all I want to do
is add one doctor.
1128
00:41:56,279 --> 00:41:58,747
One doctor to expand our service area.
1129
00:41:58,749 --> 00:42:00,115
That's it.
1130
00:42:00,117 --> 00:42:02,117
But...
1131
00:42:02,119 --> 00:42:03,551
eventually...
1132
00:42:03,553 --> 00:42:05,153
[Knock on door]
1133
00:42:05,155 --> 00:42:07,188
Hi. We're here from The Today Show.
1134
00:42:13,329 --> 00:42:14,696
Hi.
1135
00:42:14,721 --> 00:42:24,721
Sync and corrected by atrn97g
www.addic7ed.com
77303
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