Original subtitles

- Here you go, everyone.

Mushrooms, onions, tomatoes and peppers,

the perfect kebab.

- Oh, no, these are the perfect kebabs.

Meat, meat, meat and meat.

And for a little variety, meat!

- Ah, thank you, Stuart,

I'll put the tasty meaty ones on our side,

and the flavorless ones on Lewis's side.

- So, Mom and Dad,

where are you going for your anniversary this weekend?

- Actually, we decided to stay home this year.

- Yeah, you know, I've been on so many work trips lately,

I decided it's better to stay home and just

snuggle with my snuggle bunnies.

- Snuggle bunny needs air.

- We need to get my parents out of the house,

because I have the perfect anniversary gift.

They got married in Hawaii so we're gonna throw them

a surprise luau.

- I'm in! You know, I put the "wow" in "luau."

- Good to know.

Mom and Dad, you have to go away.

You always go away for your anniversary.

- Well, we couldn't, even if we wanted to.

Grandparents are traveling and there's no one

to watch you kids.

- Really?!

No one? What about me?

- Oh, yeah, we need someone to watch you, too.

- Lewis, if I didn't know you were kidding, I'd be insulted.

- I wasn't kidding. - I'm insulted!

- Lewis, be nice, Clark is very capable.

- Lewis, I am very dependable, I am alert, I am aware,

nothing gets past me.

- Your kebabs are burning. - Oh! I got it! I got it!

[coughs]

- Should we order pizza?

- [coughing]

- ♪

- [gasps] Remember when Clark

played the ukelele at our wedding?

- Yeah, no one asked him to.

- ♪

- What is this? - What's going on?

- I'll tell you what's going on!

You two are the next lucky contestants

on "Who Needs a Vacation?!"

Stuart, tell them how the game works.

- Our vacation experts will examine you both to decide

who needs a relaxing getaway the most!

Experts?

- Hey, it's me. The expert.

This "Need a vacation" detector will help me choose the winner.

- [detector squeaking]

- Hmm, in my expert opinion, the person who needs a vacation

the most is...the both of you! It's a tie!

- [cheering]

- Stuart, tell them what they won!

- An overnight staycation

at the nearby Rain Water Luxury Spa!

- Grand prize provided for, paid for by Clark!

With Lewis's credit card.

- Happy anniversary!

- Aww. You know what?

A spa staycation actually sounds kinda nice.

- Ha, and leave Clark in charge?

He's gonna flood the house. Or break the kids.

- We promise we'll be fine

and the house will be perfect when you get back.

- Yeah, your bag's already packed.

- Well, it is our anniversary.

- And you don't wanna spend it with your kids.

- Or your brother's kid.

- Okay, fine, we'll go.

Besides, apparently, we already paid for it.

- Now, get out of here, you lovebirds.

- Bye! - Love you!

- Love you, bye! Bye! See you, bye!

Okay, guys, it's luau time, we only have one day

to plan the best anniversary surprise ever!

- Ooh, I am so ready. I got my ukelele right here.

You know, your parents begged me to play at their wedding.

- ♪

- And I'm begging you to stop.

- ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, wee!

♪

♪ Hey, hey, wee! ♪

- ♪

- Wow, it's really starting to feel like Hawaii in here.

Check out the bride and groom coconuts I made.

- Which one is which?

Ah, now I see it.

- Oh, these decorations are not bad, guys,

but I think we can take this Hawaiian theme

to the next level.

How about transforming the living room

into a sandy beach?

- Ah, sand might get a little messy.

- Hey, how hard do you think it'll be to put in a waterfall

right over here?

- Okay, we need to find something to distract my dad

so he doesn't... destroy the house.

- Oh, I have an idea.

Uncle Clark, you know what?

We need someone to make the lava cake.

- Ooh! Yeah, I can do that.

I watch a ton of cooking shows.

- Great, but you have to keep the kitchen clean.

Remember what we promised Uncle Lewis.

- Ah, please, I got this under control,

even if Lewis is always saying I'm so irresponsible.

- Clark is so irresponsible.

- Honey, I am sure everything is fine,

just put the cucumber slices on your eyes and relax.

- You're right.

I need to relax with vegetables in my eyes.

- Oh, I know what will put your mind off things.

Let me tell you about my expedition to the Galapagos.

The water was swirling--

- [laughing]

- LEWIS: I gotta get home.

- And then a dolphin swam up, right up to us.

- This is relaxing, just keep talking.

Don't leave out a single detail.

- Okay.

- ♪

- This is a great dinner you made, Dad.

- Thanks.

- Would you please pass the broccoli?

- LEWIS: Clark made them broccoli?

- Arthur, don't forget to use your napkin.

- Where's the flood? Where's the mess?

Am I at the right house?

- After dinner, Arthur and I are going to practice

our hula dance for the luau.

- LEWIS: Aw, they're planning a surprise for our anniversary.

Charlotte's gonna love this.

- [ding] - Oh, that's the cake.

Everyone, grab your dishes.

- LEWIS: I bet that kitchen's a mess.

- Wow, that looks amazing.

- It's a Clark "originale."

A lava cake shaped like an actual volcano.

- Can we have some? - Is it your anniversary?

Then, no.

- You should've said it was.

- Let's grab some decorations from the garage.

- Yeah, yeah, mm-hmm.

- LEWIS: A-ha! This kitchen is--hmm, spotless?

Ooh, cake!

Mmm, that smells amazing.

Ooh, hot, hot, hot, hot!

Oh, no! Not the couch! What have I done?

Oh, no, no, no!

No!

- Come on, we still have lots of work to do.

- Yeah.

- LEWIS: Please don't see me, please don't see me.

How did they get this floor so clean?

- LEAF: Side, side, left, left, right, right.

No, Arthur, you need to swing your hips more.

Do you even have hips?

Hey, Dad. - Hey, son, how you doing?!

Um, you didn't even see me here.

- And you didn't see me teaching Arthur how to hula dance.

Bye, Dad.

Up, left, left, up, left--

- Oh, no! What happened to the cake?!

- You tell me, this was supposed to be

a tall and majestic volcano,

does it look tall and majestic to you? Does it?

- Okay, well, I might've taken a tiny taste with a toothpick,

but it can't have caused that!

- It's a volcano, Stuart,

you could've caused an internal eruption.

Now I gotta start from scratch.

- Well, you did it once, you can do it again.

Uncle Clark, you've got chocolate on your pants.

- What?! Aw, man!

I must have gotten cake batter all over them.

- And you got it on the couch, too!

- No, no, no, no, no! - My dad's gonna be so mad!

- Okay, alright, okay.

Okay, let's get our story straight, alright?

We'll just say somebody snuck into the house,

put the cake on the couch, snuck it back to the kitchen

and then snuck back out.

- Seriously?! Who is gonna believe that?

- Okay, we'll just say Stuart did it.

- ♪

- Okay, rubbing a stain can make it bigger.

Did not know that.

- Okay, off to big volcano cake number two.

How's the stain looking? - Oh, better, so much better.

- How's the stain? - Worse! So much worse!

- That is worse, but don't freak out.

- I'll try, but, I'm not making any promises.

- I found some old furniture cleaner in the garage

and it's even environmentally friendly.

Come on.

Apparently not couch friendly, it's turning green!

- Is it okay to freak out now?

- Sure, I'll join you, but let's keep it quiet

so your dad doesn't hear us.

- [whispered yelling]

- No one as sure what it was,

but I knew right away what it was.

- What was it?!

- CHARLOTTE: A Galapagos marine iguana.

- Wow. Who knew?

- [chuckles] I knew.

- You were right about the spa, I'm so relaxed,

I'm not even worried about the kids anymore.

- Oh, the kids, you're right, I should probably call them.

[sighs]

- Hi, Mom! - Hi, Ivy.

How's everything going?

- Everything's great, Mom!

- And Uncle Clark is taking really good care of you guys?

- Yeap, great care, so much care,

he couldn't care more-- - Hey!

- Shh, don't scream, Ivy's on the phone with her mom.

- I really gotta go, Mom.

We're watching an exciting nature show.

Oh, no, a kangaroo and a wildebeest are fighting,

gotta go, Mom, bye, love you!

- [screaming]

- A kangaroo and a wildebeest

do not live on the same continent.

Ivy knows that.

[sighs] My mother's intuition is telling me

that she is hiding something.

- Well, my father's intuition tells me that

everything is just fine.

- CHARLOTTE: He doesn't know what he's talking about.

I gotta get home.

You know what, honey?

Why don't you put one of these soothing hot towels

on your face?

- LEWIS: Ow! Ooh! Hot!

- That's what makes it so soothing.

Now, tell me about your last court case.

And don't leave out any details.

- ♪

- Here's a thought, how about I just sit in this spot

and never get up? Ever.

- I have a solution.

Ivy had some fabric paint in the garage.

- Perfect, that's my boy.

- That's used to paint T-shirts, not couches.

- Yeah, son, use your head!

- Don't worry, Uncle Clark, we'll think of something.

Why don't you just focus on the cake?

- I'd like to, but I used all the baking powder

on the last cake.

- My mom keeps extra in the pantry, I'll show you.

- I will defeat you, stain.

Nothing's going to distract me-- Ooh, a quarter!

- CHARLOTTE: Oh, Ivy's fine.

They're just...baking a cake?

Ha, I guess I overreacted, but at least no one saw me.

- Oh, come on, Mom.

Can't kids plan a surprise without their parents

trying to ruin it--oh!

- A surprise? Oh, no wonder Ivy was acting weird on the phone.

[chuckles] Oh, you, uh... didn't see this.

- You didn't hear me give away the surprise.

- How did Arthur get in the paint?

- Shh, don't startle him.

Arthur, don't. Move.

- CHARLOTTE: Ah! Stupid circuit box!

Let go of my bracelet!

- [groans] He moved.

- CHARLOTTE: Oh, no, this thing is stuck.

- Hey, the power just went out.

I'll go check the circuit braker.

- CHARLOTTE: Clark will fix it. Yeah.

And meanwhile, I'll just run away from my own home.

- Dad, where are you?

- Out here trying to get the power back on.

I'm gonna hit the switch. - Okay.

- [electric beater whirring] - [batter splashing]

- Well, the good news is the power's back on.

- Aw, no! The kitchen is a disaster!

- [gasps]

- And so is the living room.

- [groans]

- Whoa, this is what a luau looks like?

Arthur, you did a good job painting.

- What are we gonna do, Dad?!

- Don't worry, before Lewis and Charlotte come home

we have plenty of time. - Yeah.

- To make a run for it, I'll grab our suitcases!

- So what happened to you?

- ♪

- Well, since we didn't wanna leave the country

like I suggested,

I guess we gotta clean this mess up.

- This is gonna take us all night.

- I found the answer to all of our problems.

- Are we going to hide in those buckets?

- No, I crowd-sourced the best cleaning solutions

and everyone says that this formula will clean anything!

Paint, chocolate, even tiger poop!

They use it at the zoo.

- Then what are we waiting for? Let's do it.

I'll finish the kitchen and remake the cake,

Ivy and Stuart, you all clean up the living room

and finish setting up the luau decorations.

- What about me? - Give that pig a bath!

- You heard him, Arthur, bath time!

- [snorting]

- Whoa, I told you this stuff works great.

- Whoa! It's getting out the paint stains too.

This stuff is awesome. - But it smells horrible.

- Yeah, did they say it cleans tiger poop,

or it's made of tiger poop?

- ♪

- Okay, guys, let's grab a quick breakfast

and get into luau mode.

- Does anyone else smell that? - Pee-yew!

- It's hurting my nostrils. - That is unpleasant.

- I thought the smell was supposed to go away.

- It smells like it moved in... and died.

- Oh, here we go,

in the comments, people say there's a lingering odor,

but it goes away...in five days.

- Five days?! Your parents are gonna be here

in a couple of hours!

- Oh, here we go, another comment says

if you put a fan on it, it goes away in one day.

- Ivy, we don't have that much time.

- Well, maybe they won't notice the smell.

- ARTHUR: [snorting]

- Okay, maybe they will notice the smell.

- Wait, if a regular fan can get the odor out in one day,

then a monster-sized fan

can probably knock it out a lot faster.

- I can rent one from the hardware store,

I'll pay for it myself,

luckily I still have Lewis's credit card.

- Whoa, I didn't know they made fans this big!

- Are you sure this isn't too powerful for what we need?

- Just to be safe, I'll set it on low.

- Yeah. - Yeah, that's good.

- Ooh! Ooh! - ALL: [screaming]

- [indistinct yelling]

- Turn it off!

- ALL: Turn it off! Turn it off!

- [chuckles] Good thing I set it on low.

- Hey, the smell's gone.

- So is most of the stuff that was in the living room.

- Do it again, do it again!

- I don't suppose we can clean this up

before Mom and Dad get home. - Yeah.

- Nope!

- Ah...surprise? - Happy anniversary?

- Did you guys enjoy the spa? You don't look very relaxed.

- You were right, Lewis, you left me in charge

and I destroyed the house.

- It wasn't my dad's fault, Uncle Lewis, it was my fault.

- Actually, it was our fault, we were trying to clean

a cake stain off the couch and we just made it worse.

- Stain on the couch?!

- And things got even worse when the power went out.

- [clears throat] The power went out?

- [chuckles] You know what's funny?

Both of those things happened around the same time

Mom and Dad came home.

- Mom and Dad came home? - You spied on us?

- I am appalled!

- When did you come home?

- I was worried, so I thought I'd sneak home

and check on things,

and I may have picked up a hot cake pan and...

tossed it on the couch.

Wait, you came home too?

- Yeah, and I may have tripped the circuit beaker

and caused the power to go out.

- So this really wasn't our fault.

- It sure wasn't Arthur's fault.

- And most importantly, it wasn't my dad's fault.

- None of this would've happened if we would've...

trusted Clark.

- Thank you, Lewis, I appreciate that.

- And for the record,

I wasn't the one who didn't trust Clark.

- Thank you, and I hope you trust that I always trusted you

to trust me to be trustworthy.

- I did.

- So, just wondering,

the next time we mess something up

or do something wrong...

- Which you know is gonna happen.

- We will get a free pass, right?

- Nope.

Now, let's say we clean up that mess

and have ourselves a luau.

- Yeah!

- ♪ - Arthur, hula time!

- ♪

- That's it, Arthur, just like I taught you.

- This is exactly like our wedding,

except we didn't have a dancing pig.

- BOTH: [chuckle]

- And you really got the stain out of the couch cushion.

You can't even tell.

- And now say "Aloha" to my dad's special lava cake.

- Clark, that is beautiful. - The cake was our idea.

- But I took it to the next level.

Watch as the lava gently oozes down the side

of the volcano.

- [gasps] - Wow.

- STUART: That's awesome. - ALL: Ooh. Ahh.

- I made that, I made that.

- [lava splattering] - IVY: [screams]

- Ooh! Ooh!

This is not quite how I pictured it.

- I know a smelly stain remover we can use.

But we're gonna have to leave the house for a week.

- How about a vacation? I hear Hawaii is nice.

- ♪

- ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey

♪

♪ Wee!

♪

♪ Hey!

♪

♪ Wee! ♪

- ♪