Original subtitles

- ♪

- Dad, I'm so glad you and Mom invited Stuart and Uncle Clark

to come live with us.

- It's been forever since we've seen them.

I wasn't even potty trained yet.

- We share a bathroom.

You could still use some work.

- Well, since the Army sent Aunt Liz overseas,

your uncle Clark thought it might be nice for Stuart

to be around family.

And that's why we have to make sure this place is spotless.

- Can you please stop mini-vacuuming me?

- [knocking]

- BOTH: They're here!

- [knocking]

- ALL: Hey!

- IVY: Hey, Stuart! - Hey!

Remember our secret handshake? - You know it!

- BOTH: [grunting]

- I guess I don't know it.

- Yeah, me neither.

- Thanks for letting me and Stuart stay here, Lewis.

- Hey, anything for my baby brother.

- Oh, here, I found this broken mailbox in your driveway.

- You hit it with the car, didn't you?

- Well, maybe you shouldn't keep it outside where it can get hit.

- Oh, I made you guys

some of my word-famous seaweed raisin muffins.

- World famous? In what world?

- Hey, we brought you guys a gift.

- Oh, yeah, show 'em the gift, Son!

- Here you go.

- A drone! Thanks!

- Yeah, we opened it to play with it.

I-I mean, test it out.

- Here, I'll show you.

- Hey, Clark!

I just want you to know that our house is your house.

In our house...

we have just a few rules.

- And that's just book one.

- Don't worry, Lewis!

I promise, we'll be very clean, quiet houseguests.

- It'll be like we aren't even here.

- [drone whirring] - [clank]

- Whoa!

- Starting now.

- [vacuum whirring] - Phow!

- ♪

- Shoo, fly!

Go outside!

Be free!

- Aw, I'm digging those dance moves, Cuz.

- [fly buzzing]

- ♪ There's no music, but we're dancing ♪

- I'm trying to get this fly.

- Oh, here. I'll help you.

- No! I was trying to shoo the fly outside.

- Sorry. - [fly buzzing]

- Wait, he's not dead.

[gasps] Okay, he's dead now.

- Do you have anything to eat besides flies?

I'm starving.

- How about some wheatloaf?

It's like meatloaf, except made with wheat.

- Call me crazy, but I prefer my meat made out of meat.

Hey, do you wanna play Zombie Shredder?

- Sorry, but I don't like video games

where you kill things.

- Technically you're not killing anything

because zombies are already dead.

- Good point, but I'm super busy.

This animal sanctuary is closing tonight.

And I'm gonna do a livestream to get people

to adopt all the animals.

- Seriously, who's gonna watch that?

- Everyone.

My charity, Ivy Cares, has a pretty big following online.

- Like what? 100 people?

- Mmm...

more like 500...

thousand.

- Five hundred thousand followers? Wow!

You know what I could do with 500,000 followers?

Have them bring me something good to eat.

Aw, here's something I can eat.

Whipped cream!

- That's shaving cream!

My dad says it gives him a better shave when it's cold.

- That's fun to taste.

- ♪

- It's weird.

Me and Stuart used to have so much in common,

but I guess he's changed.

- [gasps] Want me to cast a spell on him?

Maybe I could change him back.

- That would be great, if you were actually a wizard.

- Sorry, I'm just so excited about going

to the "World of Wizards" convention tonight.

I mean, I've read all the books.

I've seen all the movies.

I even threw up on the ride.

- Hey, guys. - Hey, Stuart.

This is Millie. - Hi!

What do you get when you cross a coyote and a weasel?

- I give up. What's the joke?

- Oh, no, it's not a joke.

I just accidentally sewed this coyote puppet to this weasel one

and...yeah, I just don't know what to call it.

- The puppets are a part of our livestream.

- Nice.

I've been working on a little something myself.

Behold!

The automatic ice cream scooper.

It scoops your ice cream so you don't have to.

- That's cool, but does anyone really need

an automatic ice cream scooper?

- Nope.

But the trick is to make people think they need one.

I mean, anybody who's cool has got to have one of these.

- [gasps] I'll take one!

I'm cool.

- And it's super easy to operate.

Here.

Put that in there.

- [machine whirring]

- Ooh! Uh, oops!

It just needs a small adjustment.

- Yeah, may need a bigger adjustment.

- ♪

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey

♪

♪ Hey, hey, woo

- ♪

- [laughs] So crazy!

- Hey, Uncle Clark.

Dad doesn't let us eat on the couch.

Snacking is for designated hard floor areas only.

- Well, I'm a grown-up and I say it's okay.

Have a seat. Let's hang!

[laughs]

- My dad only lets us watch educational programming.

- This is very educational.

It's a show about nature.

It's called "Are You Stronger Than a Gorilla?"

People go inside a cage and wrestle a gorilla.

- [gorilla growls] - [man screams]

- Ooh, he was not stronger than a gorilla.

Want a soda?

- My dad says soda's real bad.

- Bad? [laughs] Are you kidding?

It's delicious. Here.

- [heavenly music plays]

- ♪

- And...we're live!

- Hi, I'm Ivy.

Over the next couple of hours, we need to find homes

for 37 animals, including this adorable little piggy!

Cute, right?

Well, it won't be cute if it can't find a home

and ends up as a...

ham sandwich!

- [pig squeals]

- Now, here's my friend Alexander Lambilton

to tell you more.

- [British accent] Hello, I'm Alexander Lambilton!

My friends and I need your heeelp.

- I'm not sure why Alexander is British.

He didn't have an accent during the rehearsal.

Anyway--

- Oh, hey, Ivy, lamb puppet.

- Look, it's my cousin Stuart.

What are you doing here?

- I know you've both been working so hard finding homes

for all the animals.

I thought you might want to take an ice cream break?

Oh, but I just hate scooping ice cream.

There's gotta be a better way.

And now there is.

- This isn't the time to sell

your automatic ice cream scooper.

- You mean this one?

For only 29.95?

- The sanctuary is closing tonight.

And this is the last chance

to save all these poor animals' lives.

How did the pig get up on the ice cream?

- See, even pigs like the automatic ice cream scooper.

- [machine whirring]

- [clanking] - The pig!

- He's okay. - [pig snorts]

- Phew!

- But my tablet's not.

It's broken!

Now we can't get back online.

You ruined everything!

This is horrible.

- I know.

All I needed to do was sell two ice cream scoopers,

then I'd have enough to buy Zombie Shredder 2!

- That's what you're upset about?

A video game?

- It has stink technology.

You can actually smell the zombies.

- Because of you, 37 animals' lives are in danger!

- Wait, I-Ivy, I'm sorry.

I didn't realize-- - I got this, Ivy.

Horkum gorkum!

- What are you doing?

- I'm gonna make you disappear.

- Still not a wizard!

- ♪

- ANNOUNCER ON TV: Tonight on "So You Think You Can Burp"--

- MAN ON TV: [loud burp]

- Hey, we got a new mailbox!

[laughs] And it's bright yellow...

for extra visibility.

What are y'all watching?

- It's called "So You Think You Can Burp."

I never knew how great non-educational TV was.

- Is that a soda?

Leaf, you--you drank all these?

- I-I-I only gave him one.

- Well, you should've only gave him none.

- My tummy hurts.

- Well, yeah, your uncle ignored rule 83

and gave you a gallon of carbonated sugar poison.

- And chips. - Chips!

He gave you chips?

Clark...

if you're gonna live in my house,

I need you to follow our rules.

- Look, I know I'm your baby brother,

but I am tired of you always treating me

like I don't know what I'm doing!

- Because you don't!

- Oh, really?

Give me one example.

- How about the time you flooded the basement?

- I was trying to build us a swimming pool.

- And then what about the time you ate my goldfish?

- You said eat him. - I said feed him.

And the time you got Grandma lost in the corn maze.

- You have to admit, that was pretty funny.

- Yeah, it was.

- [laughing] - She was like,

[imitating Grandma] "Oh no, I can't see over the corn!"

- [laughing] She tried to eat her way out!

- BOTH: [laughing]

[sighing]

- The point is, I know what I'm doing.

We just have two different parenting styles.

Lewis, I am a grown-up,

and you need to start treating me like one.

- Clark, you need to start acting like one.

- You need to start acting like one.

You're being a meanie!

- BOTH: I'm telling Mom!

- MAN ON TV: [burps]

- I give that burp an eight.

- ♪

- And I'm calling today because you are our grand prize winner.

You've won a goat!

You don't want a goat.

How about a raccoon?

Hello?

It's been three hours, and I haven't saved one animal.

- Look, I know I messed up, but don't worry.

I fixed it.

- What do you mean fixed it?

- [chickens clucking] - [cat meows]

- I believe the words you're looking for are thank you.

- More like, what have you done?

- I adopted all the animals.

I saved their lives.

- We can't keep them all here!

- Why not?

- LEWIS: Ivy!

- Oh, your dad.

- Did you see what your Uncle Clark

brought into our house?

We've never had to use this bin before.

- Well, I guess you should go back in the house, Dad.

- Or maybe go on vacation.

I hear Fiji's nice.

- Well, I have to install the new mailbox.

I gotta grab my tools from the garage.

- No, don't go in the garage!

I mean, you can't go in the garage because...

the side door's locked.

- Oh, hey, uh, uh...

- That's okay.

I got the garage door opener right here.

- No, no, no! No, no, no!

- I got it. - No, I got it.

- I got it. - No, I got it.

- I got it. - No, I got-- no, I got--no!

- I got it, I got it! [screams]

- I got it!

- Are you not seeing what I'm not seeing?

- ♪

- ♪

- Where did all the animals go?

- STUART: We left the door to the house open.

Whew, that was close!

Your dad almost saw them.

- But now they're in the house!

- Oh.

- Ooh, it smells like a zoo in here.

- Uh, uh, sorry.

I think it was the wheatloaf.

- You'll get used to it.

[chuckles] I'm gonna install the mailbox.

- Take your time!

Seriously.

- [sheep baas]

- [duck quacks] - [goose honks]

- [dog barks] - [cat meows]

- We're in deep doo-doo!

And I am not saying that because I just stepped in goat doo-doo.

- I'm pretty sure that's from the alpaca.

- Come on, help me get these guys back in the garage!

- Okay.

- ♪

- [goose honks]

- ♪

- [sheep baas]

- ♪

- How did you even get up there?

- [pig squeals]

- Why won't you move?

- [alpaca grunts]

- Oh.

- I'll be back for you.

- [dog growls]

- ♪

- Chicken coming through!

Give me that!

This is not a designated snack area.

- [pig squeals]

- You again?

How?

- Quack, quack, quack, quack.

Quack, quack, quack, quack. - [ducks quacking]

- [horse snorts]

- [calf moos]

- ♪

- [laughs]

- How many do we have left?

- I can't count!

They keep moving.

- LEWIS: Hey, Stuart!

- My dad!

- Everyone in the kitchen!

- Go, go, go, go, go!

Hey, Dad!

- Hey, what are you two up to?

- Nothing.

Just a whole lot of nothing.

- There's so much not going on.

- Guys wanna get some pizza?

Unless your dad has a no pizza rule.

- Hey, pizza sounds great to me. The usual?

Half sausage. - Half pepperoni.

- BOTH: And all meatball.

- [clears throat]

- Oh, right.

Well, thanks for offering to pick up the pizza.

You're the best dad ever!

- I thought we were both going-- - Okay, see you later!

- [sheep baas]

- [chicken clucks]

- Uh-oh! My dad's coming!

Everyone, back in the garage!

- Hey, Ivy, I've just installed the new mailbox.

Now it's time to celebrate

with a tofu turkey and alfalfa sprout sandwich.

Want one?

- No thanks, not hungry.

- Uh-huh!

Now, this is some real food, not like that processed garbage

your uncle brings into this house.

You know, your uncle has always been irresponsible.

- You guys are just different.

- [raccoon chitters]

- That is an understatement.

I always do things the right way.

And he always does whatever he wants.

Like the time we wanted to get bunk beds.

He insisted on putting it up himself.

Middle of the night, the bed fell right on me.

He left out seven screws.

Did he follow instructions?

No.

He slept through the whole thing.

You took a bite of my sandwich?

- Uh...yes, I said I wasn't hungry,

but then I realized I am actually hungry.

- Well, finish it.

I'll make another one.

I used that goat cheese you love.

- You can really taste the goat.

Well, thanks for the sandwich!

- We did it!

- This is no time for a high five.

We still have a huge problem.

- I'm sorry, Ivy.

I've only been here for one day, and I've ruined everything.

Usually it takes me at least a week.

I just really wanted that video game.

- Is that smelly zombie game really that great?

- My mom and I have been waiting for that game to come out.

I just wish she wasn't overseas so we can play it together.

- Well, hey, she won't be gone forever.

By the time she gets back,

there will probably be an even better version.

You'll be able to taste the zombies.

- Look what I found in my room!

Whoa, animals!

So many animals!

- [horse snorts]

- 37 animals.

- You can't tell anyone.

We need to get them out of here.

- Not Arthur!

I named him Arthur.

- How did the pig get in your bedroom?

- [phone ringing]

- Hey, Milly. Can't chat right now.

- Okay, I just called to tell you

the wizards convention is amazeballs!

They're even selling amazeballs!

[coughs]

That's spicy.

Thankfully, I have some brickle brew!

- Isn't that just lemonade?

- Yeah, they probably just call it brickle brew

to get wizards to buy it.

Wait.

That's it!

I know how I'm gonna fix this.

- ♪

- [indistinct chatter]

- [Renaissance music playing]

- Everyone knows that brindle spawns

are known for their independence and intelligence.

- So your wizard animal...

is a cat. - [cat meows]

- Aww!

I feel my power surging already.

- This brickle brew is amazing!

- Thanks for getting all the wizards here.

- Now let's convince them they all need pets.

- You convinced me!

I'm taking the rat.

- Uh, we didn't have any rats.

- Whatever.

We've already bonded.

- Oh, aren't you adorable!

- Yes, I am.

And don't touch my pig.

- This was a brilliant idea, Stuart.

- I couldn't have done it without you.

The animal costumes you made look awesome!

- And we made a ton of money selling brickle brew.

I can get a new tablet.

- And I can get my video game.

After all these years, we still make a great team.

- What is going on here?

- Ooh, I had nothing to do with this.

Is that a sheep with wings?

- ♪ Woo ♪

- ♪

- And that's why there were wizards

shopping for pets in our garage.

- I guess that explains the rat in the laundry room.

- Okay, I think you might have a rat problem.

- Look, I'm not gonna lie.

This whole living together thing has gotten off to a rocky start.

- Huh, finally, something we can agree on.

- Come on, it's only been one day!

We can make this work.

I know we have our differences, but we're family.

- Yeah, we all just need to try a little harder.

I'll start by not bringing 37 animals into the house.

- [laughs] That's my boy!

And I'll start by getting rid of all these donuts.

- And I guess it wouldn't kill me to lighten up a bit.

- Yup. - No kidding.

- Tell me about it.

- Does this mean I can keep Arthur?

- What are you doing with a pig?

Pigs are dirty and stinky, disgusting--

- Is this you lightening up?

- Fine.

The pig can stay.

- Yeah! - Yes!

- Thanks, Dad! Come on, Arthur.

Let's go fill the bathtub with mud!

- [pig squealing]

- Whoa, hold on, hold on, hold on!

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!

No mud in the house.

- Since I'm gonna be more responsible,

I wanna responsibly let you know

that I drove over the mailbox again.

- What?

- I was trying to go around a wizard on an alpaca, you see?

And that's just not normal.

It was dark--

- I'm glad I'm here.

Me and you are gonna have a lot of fun together.

- I know we are. - I got a lot of big ideas.

The two of us living together, we can do anything.

- Hey, we did find homes for all those animals.

- Yeah.

Except one.

- [raccoon chittering]

- BOTH: [yelling]

- ♪

- ♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey

♪

♪ Hey

♪

♪ Hey

♪

♪ Wee ♪

- ♪