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1
00:00:08,975 --> 00:00:11,009
You're either a Michael,
a Fredo, or a Sonny.
2
00:00:11,011 --> 00:00:13,045
I'm going to mix us up
some things here.
3
00:00:13,047 --> 00:00:16,048
Oh! I love what you've done
with what's left of the place.
4
00:00:16,050 --> 00:00:17,383
I always thought
I was a Michael,
5
00:00:17,385 --> 00:00:19,785
but [Chuckles] clearly,
I'm a Sonny.
6
00:00:19,787 --> 00:00:21,253
I'm gonna mix us up
some things here.
7
00:00:21,255 --> 00:00:22,988
Smoking crack
on a marble floor,
8
00:00:22,990 --> 00:00:25,490
it just -- it adds
a "last days of Rome" vibe
9
00:00:25,492 --> 00:00:27,458
to the whole enterprise.
[Sniffs]
10
00:00:27,460 --> 00:00:28,995
Clearly, I'm a Sonny.
11
00:00:28,997 --> 00:00:31,830
I mean, I self-destruct,
I'm easily provoked,
12
00:00:31,832 --> 00:00:36,268
and can't handle the big job
because I cannot handle myself.
13
00:00:36,270 --> 00:00:39,004
I'm also always had a lot
of trouble at toll booths.
14
00:00:39,006 --> 00:00:41,006
[Glasses clink]
15
00:00:41,008 --> 00:00:42,741
What's your story anyway?
16
00:00:42,743 --> 00:00:47,012
It's the story of cruelty,
greed, and death.
17
00:00:47,014 --> 00:00:48,346
Yeah, that's gonna be
a hard pass.
18
00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:49,682
Only Dickens could make
19
00:00:49,684 --> 00:00:50,948
that kind of a tale amusing.
[Lighter clicks]
20
00:00:50,950 --> 00:00:52,484
You know what
the key was to that?
21
00:00:52,486 --> 00:00:53,885
Silly names.
22
00:00:53,887 --> 00:00:55,554
Abject poverty
in the Industrial Age
23
00:00:55,556 --> 00:00:56,888
goes down a lot smoother
24
00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:59,091
when it's happening
to Sweedlepipe Chuzzlewit.
25
00:00:59,093 --> 00:01:00,191
Shut up!
26
00:01:00,193 --> 00:01:01,293
Shut up!
27
00:01:01,295 --> 00:01:02,494
Shut up!
28
00:01:02,496 --> 00:01:04,629
[Bottle topper pops,
lighter clicks]
29
00:01:04,631 --> 00:01:06,565
Well...
[Chuckles]
30
00:01:06,567 --> 00:01:08,133
Fix -- Oh!
31
00:01:08,135 --> 00:01:09,635
[Blows landing]
Kick him in the dick!
32
00:01:09,637 --> 00:01:12,504
Kick him in the dick!
Kick him in the dick!
33
00:01:12,506 --> 00:01:15,040
You take things too far.
Do you know that?
34
00:01:15,042 --> 00:01:16,642
Are you tired of it?
35
00:01:16,644 --> 00:01:21,379
Tired of always calling a game
that you never actually play?
36
00:01:21,381 --> 00:01:22,348
[Scoffs]
37
00:01:22,350 --> 00:01:24,149
[Chuckling]
Oh!
38
00:01:24,151 --> 00:01:25,751
Batter up!
Batter up!
39
00:01:25,753 --> 00:01:28,320
Batter up!
Batter up, bitch.
40
00:01:28,322 --> 00:01:29,655
Whoo-hoo!
41
00:01:29,657 --> 00:01:30,856
[Laughs]
42
00:01:30,858 --> 00:01:31,923
[Bottle topper pops,
glasses clink]
43
00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:33,325
[Lighter clicks]
44
00:01:33,327 --> 00:01:35,093
♪♪
45
00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:38,797
I want you to fuck me
on the front row!
46
00:01:38,799 --> 00:01:41,266
And I want you
to lock eyes
47
00:01:41,268 --> 00:01:45,136
with the saddest dad
you can find --
48
00:01:45,138 --> 00:01:49,273
one that only has visitation
on the weekends.
49
00:01:49,275 --> 00:01:52,610
Oh, I really wish that hadn't
just gotten me hard.
50
00:01:52,612 --> 00:01:54,179
[Laughs]
[Chuckles]
51
00:01:54,181 --> 00:01:56,248
♪♪
52
00:01:56,250 --> 00:01:57,483
Papa Stinker:
There's nothing in the Little Bear League rule book
53
00:01:57,485 --> 00:01:59,251
that says skunks can't play baseball.
54
00:01:59,253 --> 00:02:01,620
Pipsqueak:
Papa Stinker's right! Play ball!
55
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:03,089
♪♪
56
00:02:03,091 --> 00:02:04,623
Jim: Boy, I really want
to find out
57
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:06,692
what happened at the end
of "Little Stinkers 2."
58
00:02:06,694 --> 00:02:08,960
They threw us out of there
before we could find out
who won the big game.
59
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,329
[Lighter clicks]
I mean, you assume
60
00:02:10,331 --> 00:02:11,997
it's going to be the Stinkers,
but you don't know.
61
00:02:11,999 --> 00:02:13,699
You know, they already
greenlit part three.
62
00:02:13,701 --> 00:02:17,002
I mean, uh, could be
an "Empire Strikes Back"
kind of a situation.
63
00:02:17,004 --> 00:02:19,237
This is a franchise
that takes chances.
64
00:02:19,239 --> 00:02:21,373
I mean, nobody saw
the death of Susie Stinker
65
00:02:21,375 --> 00:02:25,110
coming at the end of part one,
but, uh, they went there.
66
00:02:25,112 --> 00:02:27,979
Have to get something special
from the bedroom.
67
00:02:27,981 --> 00:02:29,581
Ooh,
if you want to go again,
68
00:02:29,583 --> 00:02:31,983
I'm gonna need
a little bit more downtime.
69
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,720
You know, anal really takes
the lead out of my pencil.
70
00:02:34,722 --> 00:02:36,054
And my Viagra contact
71
00:02:36,056 --> 00:02:39,825
moved back to, uh, uh, uh,
uh, um...
72
00:02:42,530 --> 00:02:44,295
I have something else
in mind.
73
00:02:44,297 --> 00:02:45,330
Oh.
[Chuckles]
74
00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:47,032
[Chuckling] What?
75
00:02:47,034 --> 00:02:50,001
Life is meaningless chaos.
76
00:02:50,003 --> 00:02:52,137
The only control
you ever have
77
00:02:52,139 --> 00:02:54,373
is when you create
some of your own!
78
00:02:54,375 --> 00:02:56,442
[Laughs]
Oh.
79
00:02:56,444 --> 00:02:57,409
Okay.
80
00:02:57,411 --> 00:02:59,879
[Laughs]
81
00:02:59,881 --> 00:03:01,981
[Chuckles]
82
00:03:04,285 --> 00:03:05,884
Uh-oh.
83
00:03:05,886 --> 00:03:07,520
You ready to go crazy?!
84
00:03:07,522 --> 00:03:09,155
I am.
85
00:03:09,157 --> 00:03:10,756
I just found
some random pills
86
00:03:10,758 --> 00:03:13,625
in the secret, little
drug pocket of my pants here.
87
00:03:13,627 --> 00:03:16,027
Boy, I have no idea
what these are.
88
00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:17,663
Well...
89
00:03:20,634 --> 00:03:22,434
[Exhales sharply, chuckles]
90
00:03:22,436 --> 00:03:23,602
You ready
for an adventure?!
91
00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:27,305
Yes.
92
00:03:27,307 --> 00:03:29,374
♪♪
93
00:03:29,376 --> 00:03:32,110
Oh, we are definitely not
on the same page
94
00:03:32,112 --> 00:03:34,179
about how to spend
this evening.
95
00:03:34,181 --> 00:03:36,648
Mnh-mnh.
Hmm.
96
00:03:36,650 --> 00:03:40,452
[Echoed booing]
97
00:03:40,454 --> 00:03:42,053
Okay, I'm about
as all-American as they come.
98
00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:44,589
I love baseball, hot dogs,
apple pie, rye whiskey.
99
00:03:44,591 --> 00:03:46,025
I never got into handguns,
though.
100
00:03:46,027 --> 00:03:47,459
-Let's play
Russian roulette.
101
00:03:47,461 --> 00:03:48,860
-Oh, my God. Jesus.
102
00:03:48,862 --> 00:03:50,295
I thought you were
gonna murder me.
103
00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:52,130
I mean, no,
you understand, right?
104
00:03:52,132 --> 00:03:54,066
You give off
a really murdery vibe.
105
00:03:54,068 --> 00:03:55,267
-[Inhales sharply]
106
00:03:55,269 --> 00:03:56,801
-Oh, God.
You know what?
107
00:03:56,803 --> 00:03:58,404
No.
I'm gonna say no to this.
108
00:03:58,406 --> 00:03:59,871
Come on.
109
00:03:59,873 --> 00:04:02,874
Because as much as I might
hate my life -- and I do --
110
00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:04,876
I don't really want
to end it quite yet.
111
00:04:04,878 --> 00:04:06,645
Don't you?
112
00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:08,747
I've watched you choose death
every day you've been here.
113
00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:11,150
I'm just suggesting
we pick up the pace.
114
00:04:11,152 --> 00:04:14,486
Yeah, this is -- this is fast
enough for me. Seriously.
115
00:04:14,488 --> 00:04:16,621
I mean, you know, my friends,
my family, they --
116
00:04:16,623 --> 00:04:19,391
Would what? What?
They'd be devastated?
117
00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:21,693
You think so?
118
00:04:21,695 --> 00:04:25,296
There's a reason
we ended up here together.
119
00:04:25,298 --> 00:04:29,501
We've burned
every possible bridge.
120
00:04:29,503 --> 00:04:33,772
I'm a burden to everybody
who's ever loved me...
121
00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:36,508
and I know
the same is true of you.
122
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:40,645
Yeah, it is.
[Chuckles]
123
00:04:40,647 --> 00:04:42,780
I mean,
don't you want to know?
124
00:04:42,782 --> 00:04:45,449
Uh, know what?
125
00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:50,255
If you pull the trigger
and it goes click,
126
00:04:50,257 --> 00:04:54,726
are you gonna feel
relief or regret?
127
00:04:54,728 --> 00:04:57,062
[Exhales sharply]
128
00:04:57,064 --> 00:04:58,530
Pbht.
129
00:04:58,532 --> 00:05:01,200
That is something
I'd like to know.
130
00:05:01,202 --> 00:05:03,202
[Exhales sharply]
131
00:05:07,274 --> 00:05:08,507
All right.
Here.
[Laughs]
132
00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:09,941
Shit.
[Chamber clicks]
133
00:05:09,943 --> 00:05:11,610
What do you --
How do you start
something like this?
134
00:05:11,612 --> 00:05:12,745
Um...
Jesus Christ.
135
00:05:14,415 --> 00:05:15,547
Alright,
easy with that thing.
136
00:05:15,549 --> 00:05:17,749
Okay.
We let the gun decide.
137
00:05:17,751 --> 00:05:19,484
Okay, we let the gun --
Hey.
138
00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:20,952
Oh, I see.
Alright.
139
00:05:20,954 --> 00:05:22,287
[Objects clatter]
140
00:05:22,289 --> 00:05:23,822
Oh boy.
[Grunts]
141
00:05:23,824 --> 00:05:26,091
Alright. Okay. You know what?
142
00:05:26,093 --> 00:05:27,959
L-L-Let -- Let me --
Shh, shh, shh, shh,
shh, shh, shh!
143
00:05:27,961 --> 00:05:29,928
[Sighs]
144
00:05:31,365 --> 00:05:34,566
It does seem to be pointing
generally in your direction.
145
00:05:36,270 --> 00:05:38,303
So, I figure,
got a 1 in 6 chance, right?
146
00:05:38,305 --> 00:05:40,906
That's -- what is that --
That's 16.66 percent.
147
00:05:40,908 --> 00:05:42,775
Uh, definitely faced
worse odds in my life.
148
00:05:42,777 --> 00:05:44,576
You probably have, too.
149
00:05:44,578 --> 00:05:46,178
Plus, if you factor in
gravity,
150
00:05:46,180 --> 00:05:47,546
the bullet is likely
to have settled
151
00:05:47,548 --> 00:05:48,580
towards the bottom
of the chamber there,
152
00:05:48,582 --> 00:05:49,581
so that means that, uh,
153
00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:50,716
your odds are more like --
154
00:05:50,718 --> 00:05:52,084
[Gunshot]
Oh, sh--
155
00:05:52,086 --> 00:05:53,518
[High-pitched ringing]
156
00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:56,121
Oh, shit.
157
00:05:56,123 --> 00:05:58,457
Oh, sh--
Oh!
158
00:05:58,459 --> 00:06:01,960
Oh.
Oh, my God.
159
00:06:01,962 --> 00:06:03,862
Oh, come on!
160
00:06:03,864 --> 00:06:06,731
Oh, shit.
Oh, my God.
161
00:06:06,733 --> 00:06:08,132
♪♪
162
00:06:08,134 --> 00:06:09,668
Ugh!
163
00:06:09,670 --> 00:06:12,037
♪♪
164
00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:13,071
[Bullets clinking]
165
00:06:13,073 --> 00:06:16,074
[Laughs]
166
00:06:16,076 --> 00:06:17,209
You're alive?!
167
00:06:17,211 --> 00:06:18,811
Oh, my God.
168
00:06:18,813 --> 00:06:20,345
Look at your face.
169
00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:23,048
[Laughs, coughs]
170
00:06:25,017 --> 00:06:27,353
[Monitor beeping steadily]
171
00:06:27,355 --> 00:06:29,388
[Exhales sharply]
172
00:06:31,425 --> 00:06:33,091
Hi.
173
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:35,427
[Scoffs]
You took me to the hospital?
174
00:06:35,429 --> 00:06:37,195
Pussy.
175
00:06:37,197 --> 00:06:39,231
Alright, now, the doctor says
you're gonna be just fine.
176
00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:40,632
You were very fortunate.
177
00:06:40,634 --> 00:06:43,101
The bullet just grazed
your scalp.
178
00:06:43,103 --> 00:06:44,670
Hey, e-easy there.
Suicide watch.
179
00:06:44,672 --> 00:06:46,938
It's gonna be like that
for the next 24 hours.
180
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:49,040
You just let me know if you need
me to get you a sip of water
181
00:06:49,042 --> 00:06:52,110
or to scratch an itch
or go down on you.
182
00:06:52,112 --> 00:06:54,046
Always said I'd do that
anytime, anyplace,
183
00:06:54,048 --> 00:06:56,648
and this would definitely
put that to the test.
184
00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:58,917
Can't believe I flinched
like a little bitch.
185
00:06:58,919 --> 00:07:00,919
Well, apparently,
it's very normal to flinch
186
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:03,321
when a gun is pressed
to your temple.
187
00:07:03,323 --> 00:07:06,858
Yeah, foolproof is right here,
underneath the chin.
188
00:07:06,860 --> 00:07:08,126
Just remembered
189
00:07:08,128 --> 00:07:10,062
the doctor told me
not to share that with you.
190
00:07:10,064 --> 00:07:11,930
God damn it.
I think -- Whoa.
191
00:07:11,932 --> 00:07:13,598
I think those --
192
00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,134
I think the pills I took
are starting to kick in.
193
00:07:15,136 --> 00:07:16,801
How are you still here?
194
00:07:16,803 --> 00:07:19,604
Uh, it is after visiting hours,
but having scurvy
195
00:07:19,606 --> 00:07:21,339
makes you somewhat
of a medical celebrity
196
00:07:21,341 --> 00:07:22,608
with special privileges.
197
00:07:22,610 --> 00:07:25,410
No, stupid, why didn't
you drop me off and leave?
198
00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:28,346
Well, I had to know,
God damn it.
199
00:07:28,348 --> 00:07:30,482
I mean, you pulled the trigger,
and you lived.
200
00:07:31,885 --> 00:07:33,419
You feel relief or regret?
201
00:07:37,357 --> 00:07:38,824
No.
202
00:07:38,826 --> 00:07:40,491
You didn't play the game.
203
00:07:40,493 --> 00:07:42,127
You don't get to know.
204
00:07:42,129 --> 00:07:43,428
Well,
I tried to play the game.
205
00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:44,762
No, you didn't.
206
00:07:44,764 --> 00:07:47,098
You were just a tourist getting
your kicks off my misery.
207
00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:48,634
And you think you're broken
208
00:07:48,636 --> 00:07:50,768
because your wife
cheated on you
209
00:07:50,770 --> 00:07:53,438
and your daddy
didn't love you?
210
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:57,776
[Voice breaking]
I know real pain.
I know real pain.
211
00:07:57,778 --> 00:07:59,445
Now get the fuck
out of here!
212
00:07:59,447 --> 00:08:00,778
[Sobs]
213
00:08:00,780 --> 00:08:03,449
[Sighs]
214
00:08:05,719 --> 00:08:07,652
[P.A. system beeps]
215
00:08:07,654 --> 00:08:09,053
Jim...Brockmire?
216
00:08:09,055 --> 00:08:11,290
Oh, God.
What? What?
217
00:08:11,292 --> 00:08:13,591
The doctor said that you were
the one who brought her in.
218
00:08:13,593 --> 00:08:15,326
I just wanted
to say thank you.
219
00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:16,762
Oh, yes, I did.
220
00:08:16,764 --> 00:08:19,097
Um...
221
00:08:19,099 --> 00:08:20,765
was it an accident?
222
00:08:20,767 --> 00:08:22,267
Hmm?
Oh, God, no.
223
00:08:22,269 --> 00:08:24,135
No, she wanted to go.
[Sighs]
224
00:08:24,137 --> 00:08:25,737
She did.
But, you know, sh--
225
00:08:25,739 --> 00:08:30,275
Doctor says she's, um --
she'll be alright.
226
00:08:30,277 --> 00:08:32,877
Yeah, I know.
227
00:08:32,879 --> 00:08:36,748
Don't you want her
to get better, man?
228
00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:40,619
I did...
the first five times.
229
00:08:40,621 --> 00:08:42,553
Now I just want it
to be over.
230
00:08:42,555 --> 00:08:45,557
Eh, well, she did say
231
00:08:45,559 --> 00:08:49,361
that she was a tremendous
burden on everybody --
232
00:08:49,363 --> 00:08:51,029
whoever loved her.
233
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:53,765
Nice to know we still
agree on something.
234
00:08:53,767 --> 00:08:56,768
She was the CEO
of her own company.
235
00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:58,103
[Monitor beeping echoes]
236
00:08:58,105 --> 00:09:00,973
It's hard
to come back from --
237
00:09:00,975 --> 00:09:03,208
[Grunts]
238
00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:04,876
What are you doing?
Are you dancing?
239
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:07,112
This looks bad, I'm sure.
I'm so sorry.
240
00:09:07,114 --> 00:09:09,714
I, um,
I took some mystery pills
241
00:09:09,716 --> 00:09:11,416
before she pulled out
the gun earlier.
242
00:09:11,418 --> 00:09:13,117
Oh, boy,
it must've been MDMA
243
00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:14,286
because, whoa,
244
00:09:14,288 --> 00:09:15,854
I'm vibing
on that heart monitor.
245
00:09:15,856 --> 00:09:18,290
You hear that?
Stop now.
246
00:09:18,292 --> 00:09:20,325
[Echoing beeping continues]
247
00:09:20,327 --> 00:09:23,194
I'm sorry. I'm sure this --
Oh, this is disrespectful.
248
00:09:23,196 --> 00:09:25,264
God damn it. I'm so sorry.
I just --
249
00:09:25,266 --> 00:09:27,799
My body, it just
has to talk right now.
250
00:09:27,801 --> 00:09:29,667
Ugh.
[Chuckles]
251
00:09:29,669 --> 00:09:31,069
What is wrong with you?
252
00:09:31,071 --> 00:09:34,139
So much!
Just so, so much.
253
00:09:34,141 --> 00:09:35,874
Just --
254
00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:37,809
[Echoing beeping continues]
255
00:09:37,811 --> 00:09:40,478
Idiot, Brockmire.
256
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:42,547
You're such a stupid idiot.
257
00:09:42,549 --> 00:09:44,282
[Sighs]
258
00:09:44,284 --> 00:09:47,485
[Echoing beeping continues]
259
00:09:47,487 --> 00:09:49,888
[Door closes]
260
00:09:49,890 --> 00:09:51,623
[Exhales sharply]
261
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:54,826
[Beeping normalizes]
262
00:09:58,966 --> 00:10:00,632
Oh, shit.
263
00:10:03,904 --> 00:10:06,838
[Telephone rings]
264
00:10:08,842 --> 00:10:12,110
[Indistinct chatter]
265
00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:17,749
[P.A. system beeps]
266
00:10:17,751 --> 00:10:20,084
Man:
Doctor on call to room 374.
267
00:10:20,086 --> 00:10:22,721
Doctor on call to room 374.
268
00:10:26,860 --> 00:10:31,262
♪ You'll be swell ♪
269
00:10:31,264 --> 00:10:32,864
♪ You'll be great ♪
270
00:10:32,866 --> 00:10:36,134
♪ Gonna have the whole world
on a plate ♪
271
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:39,738
♪ Starting here, starting now ♪
272
00:10:39,740 --> 00:10:45,276
♪ Honey, everything's
coming up roses ♪
273
00:10:45,278 --> 00:10:47,411
Oh, I see a lot
of new faces here,
274
00:10:47,413 --> 00:10:49,213
so I'm gonna introduce myself
again.
275
00:10:49,215 --> 00:10:51,216
My name is Jimmy,
and I work here.
276
00:10:51,218 --> 00:10:54,352
Now, you've joined us during
a very, very special week.
277
00:10:54,354 --> 00:10:56,755
This is our tribute
to Ann-Margret.
278
00:10:56,757 --> 00:11:00,291
Now, yesterday, we watched Ann
say hello to the world
279
00:11:00,293 --> 00:11:01,426
in "Bye, Bye, Birdie."
280
00:11:01,428 --> 00:11:02,894
Tomorrow, we're gonna see her
281
00:11:02,896 --> 00:11:05,464
get just covered in baked beans
in "Tommy."
282
00:11:05,466 --> 00:11:08,433
But right now, boy, I think
this is her best performance.
283
00:11:08,435 --> 00:11:11,502
This is 1971's
"Carnal Knowledge,"
284
00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:14,372
Mike Nichols' cynical
and incisive deconstruction
285
00:11:14,374 --> 00:11:17,175
of repression, sexuality,
and monogamy.
286
00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:19,310
Also, you totally get to see
her yabbos,
287
00:11:19,312 --> 00:11:22,447
so [Chuckles] enjoy.
288
00:11:23,650 --> 00:11:25,116
♪♪
289
00:11:25,118 --> 00:11:26,885
Hey, Jimmy.
290
00:11:26,887 --> 00:11:29,888
♪♪
291
00:11:35,327 --> 00:11:37,062
Why didn't you call me?
292
00:11:37,064 --> 00:11:39,398
Oh, Charles,
I wanted to, I did,
293
00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:43,868
but, uh, well, at first,
I wasn't sure I'd be okay.
294
00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:47,205
And then, after I did
pull myself together, I --
295
00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:49,607
well...
296
00:11:49,609 --> 00:11:52,110
I wasn't too sure
you'd like the new me.
297
00:11:52,112 --> 00:11:55,480
Of course I'd like you.
298
00:11:55,482 --> 00:11:58,283
Everything great in my life
299
00:11:58,285 --> 00:12:01,053
is as result of what you and I
built together.
300
00:12:04,157 --> 00:12:05,457
I-I love you, Jim.
301
00:12:08,695 --> 00:12:11,630
[Crying]
302
00:12:15,002 --> 00:12:18,070
I-I love you, too, Ch--
I love you, too.
303
00:12:18,072 --> 00:12:21,172
I think this is the first time
I've seen you cry
304
00:12:21,174 --> 00:12:23,341
without being drunk
or watching "Field of Dreams."
305
00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:26,110
[Chuckles]
I'm ju-- I'm sorry.
306
00:12:26,112 --> 00:12:28,780
I'm, like, a newborn baby.
I cry all the time now.
307
00:12:28,782 --> 00:12:30,849
[Sniffles]
Oh, man.
308
00:12:30,851 --> 00:12:33,719
Yesterday, I watched
a hummingbird eat at a feeder.
309
00:12:33,721 --> 00:12:37,255
I sobbed so hard, I gave myself
the hiccups all day.
310
00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:40,124
Well, um, listen, man.
311
00:12:40,126 --> 00:12:42,560
I came with some good news.
312
00:12:43,997 --> 00:12:48,766
Oakland wants to bring you on
as their fill-in announcer.
313
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:52,603
You'd be back
in the big leagues...finally.
314
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:54,005
[Exhales sharply]
315
00:12:54,007 --> 00:12:55,873
How the hell
is that possible?
316
00:12:55,875 --> 00:12:57,809
Well, I told them
you were in rehab,
317
00:12:57,811 --> 00:12:59,410
and they flipped out.
318
00:12:59,412 --> 00:13:02,414
They want to sell it
as a redemption story.
319
00:13:02,416 --> 00:13:04,482
[Exhales sharply]
320
00:13:05,486 --> 00:13:08,553
Doesn't half the country
still hate my guts
for calling Art a racist?
321
00:13:08,555 --> 00:13:11,356
I mean,
what the hell changed?
322
00:13:11,358 --> 00:13:13,558
Well, Art was caught
323
00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:15,960
putting cameras
in the girls' bathrooms
324
00:13:15,962 --> 00:13:18,230
at every Uncle Art's
Chicken Shack.
325
00:13:18,232 --> 00:13:22,633
That and he was paying his black
employees 30 percent less,
326
00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,169
but that story got
a lot less traction.
327
00:13:25,171 --> 00:13:28,473
Huh.
328
00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:33,511
I-I just -- I can't believe
that I keep getting
329
00:13:33,513 --> 00:13:36,847
chance after chance like this,
can you?
330
00:13:36,849 --> 00:13:40,985
Well, yeah.
It's white privilege.
331
00:13:40,987 --> 00:13:43,321
[Sighs]
332
00:13:43,323 --> 00:13:45,323
So, is that a yes
to Oakland?
333
00:13:45,325 --> 00:13:47,859
Oh, Charles, I don't know.
334
00:13:47,861 --> 00:13:50,061
I mean, I figured out
how to live here.
335
00:13:50,063 --> 00:13:52,263
Out there's an entirely
different story.
336
00:13:52,265 --> 00:13:54,132
You can't hide forever,
Jim.
337
00:13:54,134 --> 00:13:57,002
Yeah, sure I can.
I probably should, too, Charles.
338
00:13:57,004 --> 00:13:59,571
I mean, I'm an alcoholic,
and I'm a drug addict.
339
00:13:59,573 --> 00:14:01,807
And a baseball man.
340
00:14:01,809 --> 00:14:03,475
That's where
you'll always belong.
341
00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:08,279
Well...
342
00:14:08,281 --> 00:14:10,248
does this mean
you'd be coming with me?
343
00:14:13,153 --> 00:14:14,419
No.
344
00:14:16,156 --> 00:14:17,289
I've built something
in New Orleans.
345
00:14:17,291 --> 00:14:20,458
I have to stay.
346
00:14:21,494 --> 00:14:24,295
But I'll always
be in your life.
347
00:14:24,297 --> 00:14:28,032
I know you've lost
a few friends,
but I haven't.
348
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,935
I'm not gonna let you ruin
my perfect record.
349
00:14:32,506 --> 00:14:34,539
[Sobs]
Thank you, Charles.
350
00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:35,674
Alright.
351
00:14:35,676 --> 00:14:38,242
[Crying]
352
00:14:38,244 --> 00:14:40,044
Sorry.
353
00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:42,246
Geez.
354
00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:43,648
I'm ridiculous. I'm --
It's a lot.
355
00:14:43,650 --> 00:14:46,318
I'm fine.
Just pretend I'm not crying.
356
00:14:46,320 --> 00:14:50,522
Seriously.
Pull yourself together.
357
00:14:50,524 --> 00:14:52,257
This -- This--
This is a lot.
358
00:14:52,259 --> 00:14:53,592
Sorry.
[Sobs]
359
00:14:55,462 --> 00:14:57,728
But, uh, I think
I've found someone
360
00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:59,964
to help you get settled
in Oakland.
361
00:15:03,337 --> 00:15:04,502
Oh, come on.
362
00:15:04,504 --> 00:15:05,971
Hi.
[Chuckles]
363
00:15:05,973 --> 00:15:07,405
[Laughs]
364
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:09,808
Hey.
Hi.
365
00:15:11,411 --> 00:15:12,577
You look great.
366
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:14,679
No, you look great.
367
00:15:14,681 --> 00:15:16,514
[Heel clacks]
Thank you.
368
00:15:16,516 --> 00:15:18,283
[Laughs]
369
00:15:18,285 --> 00:15:19,917
Hey,
did I hear that the Frackers
370
00:15:19,919 --> 00:15:21,119
won the pennant this year?
371
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:23,187
-They did.
-Oh, my God.
372
00:15:23,189 --> 00:15:24,823
My God, Jules,
congratulations.
373
00:15:24,825 --> 00:15:26,891
I also did
some consulting work
374
00:15:26,893 --> 00:15:29,426
for Scranton Wilkes-Barre
last season.
375
00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:30,962
That's the Yankees'
AAA team.
376
00:15:30,964 --> 00:15:33,031
Oh, come on.
That's big time!
377
00:15:33,033 --> 00:15:34,898
I'm --
I'm very impressed.
378
00:15:34,900 --> 00:15:37,903
Oh, boy.
Congrats, Jules.
379
00:15:37,905 --> 00:15:39,904
Thank you.
380
00:15:39,906 --> 00:15:41,873
Alright, look, um...
381
00:15:44,244 --> 00:15:45,777
...I do want
to tell you something.
382
00:15:45,779 --> 00:15:48,480
Hey, I thought there were
going to be tits in this movie.
383
00:15:48,482 --> 00:15:50,581
There will be.
There will.
384
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:52,984
So far, it's just a whole lot
of Art Garfunkel.
385
00:15:52,986 --> 00:15:54,552
Well, it's also
a young Mike Nichols
386
00:15:54,554 --> 00:15:56,187
growing as a visual artist
387
00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:57,656
and a very restrained
performance
388
00:15:57,658 --> 00:15:58,857
by a young Jack Nicholson.
389
00:15:58,859 --> 00:16:00,391
But maybe your junky ass
390
00:16:00,393 --> 00:16:01,525
don't see so good
anymore, huh?
391
00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:02,460
Is that the problem?
It's okay.
392
00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:03,995
Huh?
Get -- Get out of here!
393
00:16:03,997 --> 00:16:05,196
Hey, hey, hey.
Go on!
394
00:16:05,198 --> 00:16:06,598
-Hey! Hey!
-No, they can't be --
395
00:16:06,600 --> 00:16:07,665
Sorry. Sorry.
Calm down.
396
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:08,933
I'm sorry!
I'm sorry.
397
00:16:08,935 --> 00:16:10,268
[Clicks tongue]
398
00:16:10,270 --> 00:16:12,137
Is there some place private
we could talk?
399
00:16:12,139 --> 00:16:13,604
Yeah, of course.
I'm sorry.
400
00:16:13,606 --> 00:16:15,907
Just go right --
right in there.
401
00:16:20,746 --> 00:16:22,613
Well, this is my room.
402
00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:24,082
[Both chuckle]
403
00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:27,051
Got kind of
a lot of down time here,
404
00:16:27,053 --> 00:16:28,352
so I work
through some of that
405
00:16:28,354 --> 00:16:30,655
by kind of
compulsively painting.
406
00:16:30,657 --> 00:16:34,025
I see that face in my dreams
every single night.
407
00:16:34,027 --> 00:16:36,227
I figure it's got
to mean something, right?
408
00:16:36,229 --> 00:16:37,762
[Sniffs]
409
00:16:37,764 --> 00:16:39,697
That's Pete Rose.
410
00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:41,099
No, it's not!
411
00:16:41,101 --> 00:16:44,369
[Chuckles]
412
00:16:44,371 --> 00:16:46,437
Holy shit.
That's Pete Rose.
413
00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:47,438
Yep.
414
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,041
Shit!
415
00:16:50,043 --> 00:16:52,843
Well...
not doing that anymore.
416
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,178
Fricking hate Pete Rose.
417
00:16:54,180 --> 00:16:55,780
[Chuckles]
418
00:16:55,782 --> 00:16:58,516
Not funny. I spent a lot
of time on this shit.
419
00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:01,252
[Chuckles nervously]
420
00:17:01,254 --> 00:17:05,322
So, you.
[Chuckles]
421
00:17:05,324 --> 00:17:08,059
Yeah, hey.
422
00:17:08,061 --> 00:17:09,260
If you went through
all 12 steps,
423
00:17:09,262 --> 00:17:12,263
how come I never got
my amends?
424
00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:14,933
That's the best part of having
your friends get sober --
425
00:17:14,935 --> 00:17:16,467
the apology tour.
426
00:17:16,469 --> 00:17:18,069
Right.
Hey.
427
00:17:18,071 --> 00:17:19,937
Hey, you can start
428
00:17:19,939 --> 00:17:21,406
with the time
you pissed the bed
429
00:17:21,408 --> 00:17:23,208
and tried to convince me
I'd done it.
430
00:17:23,210 --> 00:17:26,611
Oh, shit.
I couldn't produce
that much urine in a week.
431
00:17:26,613 --> 00:17:27,945
[Laughs]
432
00:17:27,947 --> 00:17:29,147
I'm gonna call that,
but it sounds like me,
433
00:17:29,149 --> 00:17:31,282
and I do apologize
for that.
434
00:17:31,284 --> 00:17:34,019
But thing is
that the program dictates
435
00:17:34,021 --> 00:17:35,753
we're not supposed
to make amends if doing so
436
00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,355
would cause injury
to others.
437
00:17:37,357 --> 00:17:39,423
So, you know,
I figured if you were
happy and everything,
438
00:17:39,425 --> 00:17:41,425
I wouldn't reopen
old wounds.
439
00:17:41,427 --> 00:17:42,694
You know.
440
00:17:42,696 --> 00:17:46,297
Please.
I am the toughest guy you know.
441
00:17:46,299 --> 00:17:48,299
-[Exhales sharply]
-Hit me with your best shot.
442
00:17:48,301 --> 00:17:52,236
Give me
your most dangerous apology.
443
00:17:52,238 --> 00:17:54,105
[Inhales deeply]
444
00:17:54,107 --> 00:17:56,173
[Sighs]
445
00:17:56,175 --> 00:17:57,475
Alright.
446
00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:03,181
Well...
447
00:18:03,183 --> 00:18:04,915
[Sighs]
448
00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:06,851
You know,
it took me coming here
449
00:18:06,853 --> 00:18:09,687
to understand the truth that
you just kept trying to tell me,
450
00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:12,657
that life is a series
of choices.
451
00:18:12,659 --> 00:18:14,525
And ultimately,
I really didn't have
452
00:18:14,527 --> 00:18:17,262
the power to make
different ones.
453
00:18:17,264 --> 00:18:20,665
You know, the moments that I
beat myself up over the most --
454
00:18:20,667 --> 00:18:22,933
and not the dark ones,
455
00:18:22,935 --> 00:18:25,870
those just led me
on the path to sobriety.
456
00:18:25,872 --> 00:18:27,538
No, it --
457
00:18:27,540 --> 00:18:29,207
What keeps me up at night
458
00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:32,143
is every single time
I walked away from you.
459
00:18:32,145 --> 00:18:33,478
Now, every choice I made
460
00:18:33,480 --> 00:18:35,914
that took me in the opposite
direction of you,
461
00:18:35,916 --> 00:18:38,316
[Slaps thigh]
that was the wrong one.
462
00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:42,420
Jules...
463
00:18:42,422 --> 00:18:44,955
I'm so sorry I couldn't
be a better man to you.
464
00:18:44,957 --> 00:18:46,290
I am.
465
00:18:46,292 --> 00:18:51,496
I mean, in a life
so full of regrets,
466
00:18:51,498 --> 00:18:53,231
you'll always
be my biggest one.
467
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:04,542
That's what
you were afraid to tell me?
468
00:19:05,979 --> 00:19:08,979
Shit.
469
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:12,050
Just wish I had recorded it so
I could have it for my ringtone.
470
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:16,654
Well, I'm glad that my words
could bring you some comfort,
471
00:19:16,656 --> 00:19:18,122
but...
Thank you.
472
00:19:18,124 --> 00:19:21,792
...we are supposed to back up
our words with positive actions.
473
00:19:21,794 --> 00:19:24,195
So...
Oh.
474
00:19:24,197 --> 00:19:27,899
...Jules, if there's anything
I can do for you
475
00:19:27,901 --> 00:19:32,003
to make it up to you,
anything,
476
00:19:32,005 --> 00:19:34,472
I want you
to let me know, okay?
477
00:19:34,474 --> 00:19:36,040
Okay.
478
00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:42,413
[Exhales sharply]
479
00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:44,949
I-I want you to say healthy.
480
00:19:44,951 --> 00:19:47,018
That's what you need
to focus on right now, okay?
481
00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,352
Okay.
Alright.
482
00:19:48,354 --> 00:19:50,287
Oh, I --
You ready to go to Oakland?
483
00:19:50,289 --> 00:19:52,890
Oakland?
No. God, no.
484
00:19:52,892 --> 00:19:55,693
You know, I mean, I'll try
my best and go anyway, but --
485
00:19:55,695 --> 00:19:57,161
Yeah, you will.
486
00:19:57,163 --> 00:19:58,596
Yeah, I will.
487
00:19:59,899 --> 00:20:01,032
There's one thing
I'd like to do
488
00:20:01,034 --> 00:20:02,267
before I get out of here,
though.
489
00:20:02,269 --> 00:20:04,034
[Insects chirping]
490
00:20:04,036 --> 00:20:06,571
So, how's it going, Charles?
How's Yvonne?
491
00:20:06,573 --> 00:20:09,507
She's good.
492
00:20:09,509 --> 00:20:10,742
Yeah, really good.
493
00:20:12,245 --> 00:20:13,978
Um...
494
00:20:13,980 --> 00:20:17,848
she cheated on me,
uh, with my friend Dave,
495
00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:20,651
and, well,
they're in love now,
496
00:20:20,653 --> 00:20:23,721
and she's pregnant.
497
00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:25,656
And somehow,
they convinced me
498
00:20:25,658 --> 00:20:29,127
it would be a good idea
for them to live in my house.
499
00:20:29,129 --> 00:20:32,330
So, every day's
a waking nightmare.
500
00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:37,868
Charles, you were forced
at a very young age
501
00:20:37,870 --> 00:20:39,403
to do some very adult
things,
502
00:20:39,405 --> 00:20:41,339
not the least of which
was taking care of me.
503
00:20:41,341 --> 00:20:42,607
Which you did very well,
by the way.
504
00:20:42,609 --> 00:20:44,074
But you know what?
505
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:47,078
You still got a lot
of growing yet to do.
506
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:49,747
Your best is yet to come.
I promise you.
507
00:20:51,051 --> 00:20:53,017
Thanks, Jim.
508
00:20:53,019 --> 00:20:54,219
[Pats back]
509
00:20:55,955 --> 00:20:57,622
Hey.
510
00:20:57,624 --> 00:20:59,690
Gents.
511
00:20:59,692 --> 00:21:01,593
Oh, man.
512
00:21:07,567 --> 00:21:09,166
Well, you can't expect
me to stay sober
513
00:21:09,168 --> 00:21:11,168
in a place
this depressing.
514
00:21:11,170 --> 00:21:12,337
[Liquid pours]
515
00:21:12,339 --> 00:21:13,838
[Scoffs]
516
00:21:19,512 --> 00:21:21,912
So, the suspense
is killing me.
517
00:21:21,914 --> 00:21:24,315
What made you finally
pussy out and get sober?
518
00:21:24,317 --> 00:21:26,250
[Chuckles]
519
00:21:26,252 --> 00:21:29,787
I just got tired of being such
a burden on all my loved ones.
520
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,922
And I realized that my death
was probably not gonna be
521
00:21:31,924 --> 00:21:33,924
a solution to that problem.
522
00:21:33,926 --> 00:21:37,328
If anything, it was just gonna
make it more permanent.
523
00:21:37,330 --> 00:21:40,331
No, if I wanted to undo
all the damage that I had done,
524
00:21:40,333 --> 00:21:42,934
I was gonna have to become
a sober, responsible adult
525
00:21:42,936 --> 00:21:44,468
for the first time
in my life.
526
00:21:44,470 --> 00:21:46,904
And maybe, just maybe,
if I did that,
527
00:21:46,906 --> 00:21:49,606
I'd be fortunate enough
to get to do things
528
00:21:49,608 --> 00:21:52,677
like spend time
with you two again.
529
00:21:56,416 --> 00:21:58,416
My guess
was gonna be heroin.
530
00:21:58,418 --> 00:22:00,151
No.
531
00:22:00,153 --> 00:22:02,353
No drug could have ever gotten
me to that place of truth,
532
00:22:02,355 --> 00:22:03,755
believe me.
533
00:22:03,757 --> 00:22:06,023
I think you're wildly
underestimating heroin.
534
00:22:06,025 --> 00:22:07,090
[Chuckles]
535
00:22:07,092 --> 00:22:08,359
I just want to do
536
00:22:08,361 --> 00:22:11,396
all the things I never
had time for before.
537
00:22:12,899 --> 00:22:14,999
Like watch this sunset,
for example.
538
00:22:18,905 --> 00:22:20,305
Okay, how long
do I have to do this
539
00:22:20,307 --> 00:22:22,106
before I'm able to say
that I did it?
540
00:22:22,108 --> 00:22:25,710
-Most people wait 'til
it's actually completely set.
541
00:22:25,712 --> 00:22:26,911
-[Sighs]
542
00:22:26,913 --> 00:22:28,179
♪♪
543
00:22:28,181 --> 00:22:30,314
Well, Jesus Christ.
Is it even moving?
544
00:22:30,316 --> 00:22:31,849
["Everything's Coming Up Roses"
plays]
545
00:22:31,851 --> 00:22:35,919
-Was there a time
when this was fun?
546
00:22:35,921 --> 00:22:40,325
-♪ Everything's
coming up roses ♪
547
00:22:40,327 --> 00:22:44,495
♪ For me and for you ♪
45258
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