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1
00:00:02,099 --> 00:00:04,301
You always said you'd
never leave Kansas City
2
00:00:04,335 --> 00:00:06,138
unless it was for something really big.
3
00:00:06,170 --> 00:00:08,439
Well, I just got an offer
from New York, darlin'.
4
00:00:08,472 --> 00:00:09,320
The Yankees?
5
00:00:09,328 --> 00:00:10,074
The Mets.
6
00:00:10,162 --> 00:00:11,019
Ohh.
7
00:00:11,122 --> 00:00:13,223
Yeah, I know, but I'd still
be the voice of New York.
8
00:00:13,257 --> 00:00:15,226
And you and I would finally
be the king and queen
9
00:00:15,258 --> 00:00:17,027
of a great city... of the city.
10
00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:19,029
Well, Kansas City's a great city.
11
00:00:19,063 --> 00:00:20,398
Yeah, for ribs, and that's it.
12
00:00:20,430 --> 00:00:21,633
And Memphis is better.
13
00:00:21,665 --> 00:00:23,968
Jim, we have neighbors.
14
00:00:24,002 --> 00:00:25,737
Watch your mouth.
15
00:00:25,770 --> 00:00:28,106
We've built a life for ourselves here.
16
00:00:28,139 --> 00:00:30,375
It's also small-time, is what it is.
17
00:00:30,407 --> 00:00:32,176
I'm... I'm a peacock, darlin'.
18
00:00:32,209 --> 00:00:35,179
I need to strut my stuff
out there on the world stage.
19
00:00:35,212 --> 00:00:38,249
I love you, Jim.
20
00:00:38,282 --> 00:00:40,517
And I want you to be happy.
21
00:00:42,319 --> 00:00:43,454
So...
22
00:00:45,250 --> 00:00:46,523
let's do it.
23
00:00:46,557 --> 00:00:48,193
- Really?
- Yeah.
24
00:00:48,225 --> 00:00:49,493
- New York?
- Yeah.
25
00:00:49,526 --> 00:00:51,395
Honey, I love you. I love you.
26
00:00:51,429 --> 00:00:52,731
Mwah.
27
00:00:52,764 --> 00:00:55,032
You know, the first
time you said that to me
28
00:00:55,066 --> 00:00:56,632
was 20 years ago today.
29
00:00:57,298 --> 00:00:58,447
Is today the 9th?
30
00:00:58,513 --> 00:00:59,187
Mm-hmm.
31
00:00:59,211 --> 00:01:00,538
Oh, how could I have forgotten that?
32
00:01:00,570 --> 00:01:02,172
- I'm sorry.
- Aww.
33
00:01:02,206 --> 00:01:03,475
You can make it up to me later.
34
00:01:03,507 --> 00:01:04,542
Oh-kay!
35
00:01:04,575 --> 00:01:05,576
All right.
36
00:01:05,609 --> 00:01:08,078
I might need a little
nap first, but yeah, yeah.
37
00:01:08,111 --> 00:01:09,279
Oh!
38
00:01:09,313 --> 00:01:11,549
- Love you, honey.
- I love you, too!
39
00:01:12,582 --> 00:01:14,051
Supper will be on the stove!
40
00:01:14,085 --> 00:01:15,153
Thank you.
41
00:01:31,201 --> 00:01:32,403
Bob Greenwald.
42
00:01:32,436 --> 00:01:35,272
You shut your mouth, you little bitch.
43
00:01:35,305 --> 00:01:36,640
Yes, Mistress L.
44
00:01:36,674 --> 00:01:38,543
Now, I want you to grab some nitrous,
45
00:01:38,576 --> 00:01:42,580
and you get your tiny dick to my house.
46
00:02:04,501 --> 00:02:07,805
How is it still on fire after a week?!
47
00:02:07,838 --> 00:02:10,175
It's like we're in hell!
48
00:02:10,207 --> 00:02:12,342
I feel that hell would
be more impressive.
49
00:02:12,376 --> 00:02:14,445
These FEMA assholes won't let us play
50
00:02:14,479 --> 00:02:17,215
just 'cause the ground
temperature is 157.
51
00:02:17,239 --> 00:02:18,397
They wear cleats, you know!
52
00:02:19,249 --> 00:02:20,752
I'm gonna take this.
53
00:02:20,784 --> 00:02:23,388
Okay.
54
00:02:23,420 --> 00:02:24,588
Joe Buck.
55
00:02:24,622 --> 00:02:27,258
Are we "randomly call each other
during the day" friends now?
56
00:02:27,290 --> 00:02:29,127
Mm, no, not quite.
57
00:02:29,159 --> 00:02:30,761
I've got you listed as
58
00:02:30,794 --> 00:02:33,764
Golden-Voiced Homeless
Man number 2 in my phone.
59
00:02:33,798 --> 00:02:36,102
Look, the way I see it,
60
00:02:36,166 --> 00:02:39,103
Musburger's turd means
I owe you a favor now.
61
00:02:39,136 --> 00:02:41,806
I've been making some calls, and I may
62
00:02:41,838 --> 00:02:44,141
have gotten you a job in baseball.
63
00:02:44,175 --> 00:02:46,544
Oh, Joe, I would kill up to five people
64
00:02:46,576 --> 00:02:48,680
for you if you could get
me the hell outta here.
65
00:02:48,712 --> 00:02:52,116
Atlanta's thinking about
making a change at play-by-play,
66
00:02:52,150 --> 00:02:54,152
but you make them nervous.
67
00:02:54,185 --> 00:02:57,421
So, here's the deal.
You got to go down...
68
00:02:58,855 --> 00:03:01,425
You got to go down to their
AAA club in New Orleans
69
00:03:01,459 --> 00:03:02,727
and work for a while.
70
00:03:02,759 --> 00:03:03,760
Oh, my God, that's incredible.
71
00:03:03,794 --> 00:03:04,796
And tell 'em not to be nervous.
72
00:03:04,829 --> 00:03:06,531
Tell 'em I don't drink...
73
00:03:06,563 --> 00:03:09,115
hard liquor between the
hours of 6:00 and 11:00 a.m.
74
00:03:09,234 --> 00:03:10,155
What about drugs?
75
00:03:10,187 --> 00:03:11,502
Oh, no, the cocaine, that's just...
76
00:03:11,536 --> 00:03:13,872
it's like little confidence
cups of coffee during the day,
77
00:03:13,904 --> 00:03:15,240
little bumps. That's all.
78
00:03:15,272 --> 00:03:16,508
Buddy, listen.
79
00:03:16,540 --> 00:03:18,376
If you can make it no booze
80
00:03:18,408 --> 00:03:20,711
between 6:00 a.m. and 5:00 p.m.,
81
00:03:20,745 --> 00:03:22,447
and coke only on the weekends,
82
00:03:22,479 --> 00:03:24,381
I think I can hook this up for you.
83
00:03:24,414 --> 00:03:25,917
All right, there, mommy.
84
00:03:25,949 --> 00:03:28,985
Okay, but either way, this
calls for a celebration.
85
00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:31,318
The only catch is you
have to start immediately.
86
00:03:31,350 --> 00:03:32,189
Ahh.
87
00:03:32,223 --> 00:03:33,661
What was that?
88
00:03:33,717 --> 00:03:34,659
What was that?
89
00:03:34,692 --> 00:03:37,185
- Who do you think you are?!
- Oh, oh, I gotta go.
90
00:03:37,256 --> 00:03:38,145
Thank you, Joe Buck.
91
00:03:38,375 --> 00:03:40,198
Let me know.
92
00:03:46,336 --> 00:03:48,338
This is crap.
93
00:03:48,372 --> 00:03:49,674
Who do you think you are?!
94
00:03:49,706 --> 00:03:51,675
You think you're such a
big shot, Mr. FEMA guy!
95
00:03:51,709 --> 00:03:53,444
- All right. Okay.
- You know who you are?
96
00:03:53,477 --> 00:03:55,513
You're just the orderly that's summoned
97
00:03:55,545 --> 00:03:56,813
when America shits itself!
98
00:03:56,847 --> 00:03:59,183
All right, easy there.
Hey, Jake LaMotta, easy.
99
00:03:59,217 --> 00:04:00,585
Hey, let him go.
100
00:04:00,617 --> 00:04:04,455
Come on, Jules. My
goodness, it's not his fault.
101
00:04:05,890 --> 00:04:07,258
I know.
102
00:04:07,290 --> 00:04:09,193
It's Pennsylvania Shale's.
103
00:04:14,814 --> 00:04:17,417
What the fuck do you think you're doing?
104
00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:18,636
I'm playing solitaire.
105
00:04:18,956 --> 00:04:21,093
Yeah, I got addicted to the
solitaire on my office computer,
106
00:04:21,126 --> 00:04:22,161
so I come in here...
107
00:04:22,194 --> 00:04:23,828
You set fire to my field?!
108
00:04:23,862 --> 00:04:25,564
I heard about the natural phenomenon
109
00:04:25,597 --> 00:04:27,500
occurring at the
stadium. That is a shame.
110
00:04:27,533 --> 00:04:28,867
I just want to assure you that we...
111
00:04:28,900 --> 00:04:30,502
Just be real for one God damn second
112
00:04:30,535 --> 00:04:32,004
and admit that you set fire to my field
113
00:04:32,037 --> 00:04:33,939
because you want my team to go under
114
00:04:33,972 --> 00:04:35,241
for some bullshit reason!
115
00:04:35,273 --> 00:04:38,744
I would never, ever
do anything like that.
116
00:04:38,776 --> 00:04:41,613
And even if I did, I
would never admit to it
117
00:04:41,646 --> 00:04:43,582
'cause I'm assuming you're recording me.
118
00:04:44,749 --> 00:04:45,750
What?
119
00:04:45,783 --> 00:04:48,286
Come on. Slide it over.
120
00:04:48,319 --> 00:04:50,021
Okay.
121
00:04:51,857 --> 00:04:53,292
Fine.
122
00:04:55,326 --> 00:04:57,161
Spy pen, please.
123
00:04:57,194 --> 00:05:00,499
The one just pokin' on out of the bag.
124
00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:03,868
That's good.
125
00:05:03,901 --> 00:05:06,938
All right.
126
00:05:06,972 --> 00:05:08,239
Wow, are you kidding me?
127
00:05:08,273 --> 00:05:10,242
You have a record
player in your boardroom?
128
00:05:10,275 --> 00:05:12,044
Shh, shh, shh.
129
00:05:12,076 --> 00:05:13,612
It just sounds warmer.
130
00:05:13,645 --> 00:05:15,014
My God, you're so sick.
131
00:05:15,047 --> 00:05:17,182
Look, this is nothing personal, Jules.
132
00:05:17,215 --> 00:05:19,751
I genuinely like you.
133
00:05:19,785 --> 00:05:22,554
You are very, very good-looking,
134
00:05:22,588 --> 00:05:24,790
but the forces you're
facing are bigger than me.
135
00:05:24,823 --> 00:05:26,792
They're bigger than Pennsylvania Shale.
136
00:05:26,824 --> 00:05:30,261
Someday, when everything
switches over to solar panels
137
00:05:30,295 --> 00:05:33,932
in a hundred years, or,
you know, God willing, 200,
138
00:05:33,965 --> 00:05:36,835
a guy like me is gonna be having
the exact same conversation
139
00:05:36,867 --> 00:05:39,338
with someone who owns the
best place to catch the sun.
140
00:05:39,371 --> 00:05:41,674
Or maybe it'd even
sound different, like...
141
00:05:41,706 --> 00:05:43,841
like that future
language in "Cloud Atlas."
142
00:05:43,874 --> 00:05:45,209
Oh, my God, I... Have you seen?
143
00:05:45,242 --> 00:05:49,348
That movie is wild.
144
00:05:50,915 --> 00:05:52,350
What were we talking
about right before that?
145
00:05:52,384 --> 00:05:53,985
All right, asshole.
146
00:05:54,018 --> 00:05:56,088
I thought that my revenge
was gonna be satisfying,
147
00:05:56,121 --> 00:05:58,991
but I guess I'll just
have to settle
148
00:05:59,023 --> 00:06:00,191
for petty.
149
00:06:00,225 --> 00:06:02,294
What... what do we got here?
150
00:06:02,326 --> 00:06:06,098
It's something from a
naturally occurring puddle
151
00:06:06,131 --> 00:06:07,333
inside the visitor bullpen.
152
00:06:07,365 --> 00:06:09,100
No, no. Don't, please, don't!
153
00:06:09,134 --> 00:06:10,669
- Ha!
- Not the vinyl!
154
00:06:10,701 --> 00:06:13,204
Oh, my God, the smell!
155
00:06:13,237 --> 00:06:16,307
Aah! Aah! Aah!
156
00:06:18,076 --> 00:06:22,147
Aaaaaaah!
157
00:06:22,179 --> 00:06:25,783
It burns! It's burning my eyes!
158
00:06:25,816 --> 00:06:28,954
Make it stop. It burns!
159
00:06:38,896 --> 00:06:41,666
What'd you decide, Jim?
160
00:06:41,699 --> 00:06:43,201
I'm torn, Joe Buck.
161
00:06:43,235 --> 00:06:46,852
I want the job, of course,
but the problem is Jules.
162
00:06:46,963 --> 00:06:49,367
I love her, and I'm terrified of her.
163
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:51,068
Probably in equal measure.
164
00:06:51,100 --> 00:06:53,269
Look, I think I've given
you the wrong impression.
165
00:06:53,302 --> 00:06:55,206
Uh, I just wanted to do you a solid.
166
00:06:55,239 --> 00:06:58,943
I didn't volunteer to be the
guy you come to for life advice.
167
00:06:58,975 --> 00:07:00,810
You ever mad eye contact with someone
168
00:07:00,843 --> 00:07:01,978
while they stuck a finger
169
00:07:02,011 --> 00:07:03,648
farther and farther up your butt?
170
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:05,815
And you don't know how
much more you can handle,
171
00:07:05,848 --> 00:07:06,983
but they do?
172
00:07:07,016 --> 00:07:08,752
I'm in the bathroom right now.
173
00:07:08,785 --> 00:07:10,220
Ah, just answer the question, Joe.
174
00:07:10,254 --> 00:07:11,884
I was born in Florida.
175
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:13,677
Of course I've had a finger in my ass.
176
00:07:13,683 --> 00:07:16,421
Then you know what it's
like to be in love, Joe Buck.
177
00:07:16,727 --> 00:07:18,162
I'm hanging up now.
178
00:07:18,194 --> 00:07:19,262
Hey...
179
00:07:20,864 --> 00:07:23,224
Fucking Brockmire.
180
00:07:23,256 --> 00:07:26,671
Hey! I have great news.
181
00:07:26,704 --> 00:07:29,706
Don't tell me those bastards
agreed to accept responsibility.
182
00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:31,074
No, they kicked me off their property
183
00:07:31,107 --> 00:07:32,231
and file a restraining order against me.
184
00:07:32,295 --> 00:07:33,342
But then FEMA called and said
185
00:07:33,378 --> 00:07:35,366
that the last fire finally
went out on the field.
186
00:07:35,845 --> 00:07:39,370
So we can re-sod the grass
and play our last game.
187
00:07:39,402 --> 00:07:40,985
Are you ready?
188
00:07:41,018 --> 00:07:43,220
I mean, I got nowhere else to be.
189
00:07:45,221 --> 00:07:47,323
So, we have to do
what to pay off your loan?
190
00:07:47,357 --> 00:07:49,827
I have to sell a week's worth
of concessions is one game,
191
00:07:49,860 --> 00:07:51,577
and we have to win to stay above .500.
192
00:07:51,672 --> 00:07:52,964
Forgive my negativity,
193
00:07:52,997 --> 00:07:54,831
but you're not gonna
sell that much in one day.
194
00:07:54,865 --> 00:07:57,735
Nobody's gonna eat 15 hot dogs.
195
00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:04,842
They might drink 15 beers.
196
00:08:04,874 --> 00:08:06,377
You know, we never did better business
197
00:08:06,410 --> 00:08:08,145
than when we forfeited the Butler game
198
00:08:08,177 --> 00:08:09,814
and everybody just stayed and drank.
199
00:08:09,846 --> 00:08:11,448
All right, so we get the entire stadium
200
00:08:11,482 --> 00:08:13,217
to get as drunk as humanly possible.
201
00:08:13,249 --> 00:08:14,384
I love that plan.
202
00:08:14,417 --> 00:08:16,720
♪ Swing the bat, hit the ball ♪
203
00:08:16,754 --> 00:08:18,422
- ♪ Knock it right over the wall ♪
- Ahh.
204
00:08:18,454 --> 00:08:22,191
♪ It's time to play a baseball game ♪
205
00:08:22,225 --> 00:08:26,196
♪ Step right to the
plate and take your aim ♪
206
00:08:26,230 --> 00:08:29,133
♪ See the home team score the winning run ♪
207
00:08:29,165 --> 00:08:31,735
Okay, so, I posted about
you doing a live podcast
208
00:08:31,768 --> 00:08:34,871
on your Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook.
209
00:08:34,904 --> 00:08:36,906
Maybe we could also
live stream it, right?
210
00:08:36,940 --> 00:08:40,344
Maybe one of those, uh, PayPal
donate buttons generate some,
211
00:08:40,376 --> 00:08:43,113
uh... What do you call it?
Some crowdsource money, huh?
212
00:08:43,147 --> 00:08:46,850
Yeah. That's a... a great idea.
213
00:08:46,884 --> 00:08:48,085
What can I say?
214
00:08:48,118 --> 00:08:49,320
I learned from the best, didn't I?
215
00:08:49,352 --> 00:08:50,987
All right, here we go.
216
00:08:51,020 --> 00:08:53,456
♪ Let's play a baseball game ♪
217
00:08:53,490 --> 00:08:55,931
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen,
to Morristown Stadium.
218
00:08:55,954 --> 00:08:57,827
We have got a heck of a ballgame
219
00:08:57,860 --> 00:08:59,330
planned for you here this afternoon.
220
00:08:59,363 --> 00:09:02,099
Now, in order to keep
the Frackers right here
221
00:09:02,132 --> 00:09:03,971
in Morristown where they belong,
222
00:09:03,984 --> 00:09:05,312
we have decided to hold
223
00:09:05,355 --> 00:09:07,090
a stadium-wide drinkin' contest.
224
00:09:07,282 --> 00:09:10,891
That's right, a stadium-wide
drinkin' contest.
225
00:09:11,108 --> 00:09:13,110
The rules of this game are simple.
226
00:09:13,143 --> 00:09:15,278
After every inning, drink a beer.
227
00:09:15,312 --> 00:09:17,815
After every run scored, drink a beer.
228
00:09:17,847 --> 00:09:20,350
Heck, after ever
strikeout, drink a beer.
229
00:09:20,384 --> 00:09:23,307
Oh, if the guy sittin'
next to you drinks a beer,
230
00:09:23,363 --> 00:09:24,759
you got to drink a beer.
231
00:09:24,823 --> 00:09:28,292
And drink a beer every time
you hear me say the magic words,
232
00:09:28,325 --> 00:09:30,613
"Hey, everybody, drink a beer!"
233
00:09:30,676 --> 00:09:34,398
So, good luck to us and
good luck to our Frackers.
234
00:09:35,865 --> 00:09:38,101
Are you gonna die?
235
00:09:38,134 --> 00:09:39,253
Probably not.
236
00:09:39,301 --> 00:09:42,172
But, hey, if somethin'
should happen, Charles,
237
00:09:42,206 --> 00:09:44,508
I just... I want to thank
you for all your assistance
238
00:09:44,541 --> 00:09:46,210
and your companionship. You just...
239
00:09:46,243 --> 00:09:48,445
believe it or not,
you're the best friend
240
00:09:48,477 --> 00:09:49,880
I have on this earth.
241
00:09:51,148 --> 00:09:53,384
That seemed to terrify you. Why is that?
242
00:09:53,417 --> 00:09:55,219
Well, it's 'cause...
243
00:09:55,251 --> 00:09:58,088
I could say the same thing about you.
244
00:09:59,452 --> 00:10:02,091
I really need to get my shit together.
245
00:10:02,124 --> 00:10:03,961
Oh, welcome to the
club, my young friend.
246
00:10:03,994 --> 00:10:05,396
Welcome to the club. I'll drink to that.
247
00:10:05,428 --> 00:10:07,096
To gettin' shit together.
248
00:10:07,129 --> 00:10:10,868
22 beers for the price of 21, guys.
249
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:12,969
Hi again. Whoo-hoo!
250
00:10:13,003 --> 00:10:15,406
Yep, okay. Good on you.
251
00:10:15,438 --> 00:10:17,473
More beer... we need more beer!
252
00:10:17,507 --> 00:10:21,312
Yoshi workin' on an 0-2
count to the leadoff batter.
253
00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:28,352
Oh, I haven't seen gas
like that from Yoshi
254
00:10:28,384 --> 00:10:30,420
since he played for the Yankees.
255
00:10:30,453 --> 00:10:32,989
That is the first strikeout
of the game, folks,
256
00:10:33,023 --> 00:10:36,125
and that means that we
are drinkin' a beer!
257
00:10:36,158 --> 00:10:38,995
Everybody drink a beer.
258
00:10:39,028 --> 00:10:40,865
Cheers!
259
00:10:46,981 --> 00:10:47,997
You know what?
260
00:10:48,068 --> 00:10:49,639
Folks, everybody burp with me.
261
00:10:49,672 --> 00:10:51,008
Everybody, one, two, three...
262
00:10:52,676 --> 00:10:54,378
I don't care if they puke.
263
00:10:54,411 --> 00:10:55,479
Just keep selling beer!
264
00:10:55,512 --> 00:10:57,648
Whoo! Move it!
265
00:10:57,681 --> 00:10:59,148
Next.
266
00:10:59,182 --> 00:11:00,217
That do?
267
00:11:01,652 --> 00:11:03,052
Here is your change.
268
00:11:03,086 --> 00:11:04,922
Ah-haha!
269
00:11:04,955 --> 00:11:07,391
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
270
00:11:07,423 --> 00:11:11,227
Move y'all big ass! Ha ha ha!
271
00:11:11,260 --> 00:11:13,329
Little pop-up to
the third-base side.
272
00:11:13,363 --> 00:11:16,367
Uribe giving chase. Does he have room?
273
00:11:16,399 --> 00:11:18,134
He does!
274
00:11:18,167 --> 00:11:20,004
That'll end the third,
275
00:11:20,037 --> 00:11:23,908
and that means that we are
drinkin' a beer, Morristown!
276
00:11:23,941 --> 00:11:26,410
Everybody drink a beer!
277
00:11:26,442 --> 00:11:28,678
Ha! Salute.
278
00:11:31,414 --> 00:11:35,018
No sipping, everybody.
Chugging only. Come on.
279
00:11:39,089 --> 00:11:42,326
Yeah, Pedro!
280
00:11:43,626 --> 00:11:46,296
All right,
bot... bottom of the fifth.
281
00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:48,198
Oh, here he comes.
282
00:11:48,230 --> 00:11:51,828
Folks, if you are feeling the
breeze out there in left field,
283
00:11:51,868 --> 00:11:52,970
that is coming from
the bat of John Elton,
284
00:11:53,003 --> 00:11:55,406
who has struck out
swingin' three times today.
285
00:11:55,438 --> 00:11:57,173
Hey! Shut up!
286
00:11:57,206 --> 00:11:58,708
Hey, you shut up.
287
00:11:58,741 --> 00:12:02,413
Just... just concentrate
on the ball for once.
288
00:12:04,547 --> 00:12:09,119
Oh! Somebody just set
that vacuum on blow!
289
00:12:09,152 --> 00:12:11,622
Home run for John Elton!
290
00:12:11,654 --> 00:12:14,223
That just made the score 1-0.
291
00:12:14,257 --> 00:12:15,292
My goodness!
292
00:12:15,325 --> 00:12:18,494
That means that we are drinkin' a beer!
293
00:12:18,528 --> 00:12:21,966
Drink a beer, everybody.
294
00:12:21,999 --> 00:12:23,667
Mmm!
295
00:12:23,700 --> 00:12:28,154
That is the unlikeliest
beer I have ever drunk.
296
00:12:28,208 --> 00:12:30,111
Home run for John Elton.
297
00:12:30,186 --> 00:12:32,408
Oh! Well, that's for you, too, son.
298
00:12:32,442 --> 00:12:35,078
That's for you. Congratulations.
299
00:12:35,111 --> 00:12:36,179
Mm!
300
00:12:41,717 --> 00:12:45,545
All right, now, it's time for
the seventh-inning stretch.
301
00:12:45,656 --> 00:12:47,784
Or you... you can just stay sitting
302
00:12:47,790 --> 00:12:49,465
if standing is too hard for you.
303
00:12:49,536 --> 00:12:50,694
Whoo!
304
00:12:50,726 --> 00:12:54,430
Anyway, mm, mm, mm.
305
00:12:54,464 --> 00:12:56,433
Ohh.
306
00:12:56,466 --> 00:12:59,036
Mwah!
307
00:12:59,068 --> 00:13:01,571
Hey, everybody. Hey, Morristown.
308
00:13:01,605 --> 00:13:04,541
Why do men do that at the urinal?
309
00:13:04,573 --> 00:13:08,077
Why do they lean their
head on the... on the wall?
310
00:13:08,110 --> 00:13:10,179
What's up with that?
311
00:13:10,212 --> 00:13:12,682
- Anyway...
- Keep 'em comin'!
312
00:13:12,716 --> 00:13:16,653
Guys, not throwing it, please.
313
00:13:16,686 --> 00:13:19,590
Oh, this microphone
feels cool on my head.
314
00:13:25,195 --> 00:13:26,663
Everybody...
315
00:13:26,696 --> 00:13:30,367
Ooh, hoo, everybody's feelin' it now.
316
00:13:30,399 --> 00:13:32,403
I know that I am.
317
00:13:32,436 --> 00:13:34,071
Whoa.
318
00:13:34,104 --> 00:13:36,639
M-Morristown, um...
319
00:13:36,672 --> 00:13:38,241
Jim, we did it!
320
00:13:38,274 --> 00:13:39,709
We did it!
321
00:13:39,743 --> 00:13:41,278
We made more than enough
to pay off the loan.
322
00:13:41,311 --> 00:13:43,480
- You can stop drinking.
- Oh, that's so good.
323
00:13:43,513 --> 00:13:45,416
That's so good!
324
00:13:45,448 --> 00:13:47,183
Oh, my God!
325
00:13:47,216 --> 00:13:49,086
What are you doing? Stop!
326
00:13:49,119 --> 00:13:52,321
I'm celebratin'. Come
on, you got to celebrate.
327
00:13:52,355 --> 00:13:53,757
We'll still have to win the game.
328
00:13:53,789 --> 00:13:56,092
Uh, wha...
329
00:13:56,125 --> 00:13:59,629
We're not winnin'? Come
on. What's the score?
330
00:13:59,663 --> 00:14:01,498
Pfft!
331
00:14:01,531 --> 00:14:04,101
I'm drunk.
332
00:14:04,134 --> 00:14:05,768
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm drunk.
333
00:14:05,802 --> 00:14:07,104
God damn it, I'm drunk.
334
00:14:07,137 --> 00:14:09,106
Jim, we're up by a run,
335
00:14:09,139 --> 00:14:10,841
but the bases are loaded with no outs
336
00:14:10,874 --> 00:14:12,308
in the top of the ninth.
337
00:14:12,341 --> 00:14:15,142
- Oh, that is not good.
- No.
338
00:14:15,269 --> 00:14:16,499
- So I am drinking a beer.
- Don't...
339
00:14:16,682 --> 00:14:18,648
- No, no, no, stop, stop.
- Stop, please.
340
00:14:18,682 --> 00:14:22,619
Jules, when'd you get here?
341
00:14:22,652 --> 00:14:25,254
Hey, how we doin'... doin' on money?
342
00:14:25,288 --> 00:14:26,789
Oh, dear God.
343
00:14:26,822 --> 00:14:28,458
I gotta pee. Oh, my...
344
00:14:28,491 --> 00:14:29,526
Ah, pfft!
345
00:14:36,006 --> 00:14:37,041
Come on.
346
00:14:37,074 --> 00:14:38,342
Ah!
347
00:14:38,374 --> 00:14:40,309
Oh, shit.
348
00:14:40,343 --> 00:14:42,713
He finally snapped.
349
00:14:46,717 --> 00:14:48,352
Time-out.
350
00:14:48,385 --> 00:14:49,787
Time, time, time.
351
00:14:49,819 --> 00:14:51,121
Announcer's time.
352
00:14:51,153 --> 00:14:52,388
Bring it in.
353
00:14:52,421 --> 00:14:54,123
Frackers.
354
00:14:54,156 --> 00:14:55,858
Come on, bring it in, move it!
355
00:14:55,892 --> 00:14:58,395
Whoo. All right.
356
00:14:58,427 --> 00:15:00,129
How you doin', Yoshi?
357
00:15:00,162 --> 00:15:02,198
All right, good. Yo, hustle it up.
358
00:15:02,232 --> 00:15:04,401
Good hustle, good hustle.
359
00:15:04,434 --> 00:15:06,203
Ohh.
360
00:15:06,236 --> 00:15:10,174
You guys are great. You, I love. Mwah!
361
00:15:10,207 --> 00:15:12,109
Mwah!
362
00:15:12,142 --> 00:15:13,710
Oh! You sweaty.
363
00:15:16,780 --> 00:15:19,216
Why is Brockmire sobbing,
telling us that he loves us?
364
00:15:19,248 --> 00:15:20,718
Because I do love you!
365
00:15:20,751 --> 00:15:22,486
Because you guys, you play the game...
366
00:15:22,518 --> 00:15:23,920
Wait.
367
00:15:23,954 --> 00:15:25,723
... that you all fell
in love with as kids.
368
00:15:25,756 --> 00:15:28,192
And that's... it's beautiful.
369
00:15:28,224 --> 00:15:29,959
That's beautiful.
370
00:15:29,992 --> 00:15:31,194
It's beautiful, right?
371
00:15:31,228 --> 00:15:33,363
Yeah, we'll just all gently agree
372
00:15:33,396 --> 00:15:35,031
with whatever he says, okay?
373
00:15:35,065 --> 00:15:38,301
Hey, look. It's your pal, Charles.
374
00:15:38,334 --> 00:15:39,836
- Charles.
- Charles.
375
00:15:39,869 --> 00:15:41,971
- What are you...
- Go get him.
376
00:15:42,005 --> 00:15:44,108
Life is hard for you
'cause you're black.
377
00:15:44,141 --> 00:15:45,476
- Oh.
- And that's... that's insane.
378
00:15:45,508 --> 00:15:47,243
- It's crazy, man.
- Come on.
379
00:15:47,276 --> 00:15:48,444
It's wrong. Let's go.
380
00:15:48,478 --> 00:15:50,113
What year is it?
381
00:15:50,146 --> 00:15:52,516
It's... it's... it's the
current year that... that it is?
382
00:15:52,549 --> 00:15:54,050
- Absolutely.
- That's not right.
383
00:15:54,084 --> 00:15:55,285
That's right, come on.
384
00:15:55,318 --> 00:15:56,386
Wait, I forgot to tell them one thing.
385
00:15:56,419 --> 00:15:57,454
- No, no, it's fine.
- No.
386
00:15:57,487 --> 00:15:58,454
They'll be fine. They'll be fine.
387
00:15:58,488 --> 00:15:59,622
- They'll be fine without it.
- All right, easy.
388
00:15:59,656 --> 00:16:02,291
Yoshi's running on fumes,
so somebody has to step up.
389
00:16:02,324 --> 00:16:04,127
Come on, guys, I signed you all
390
00:16:04,161 --> 00:16:06,130
'cause I saw that you all had something.
391
00:16:06,162 --> 00:16:07,897
Or had something left.
392
00:16:07,930 --> 00:16:10,166
Danny, I watched you turn
a gorgeous double play
393
00:16:10,199 --> 00:16:11,868
at a juco in upstate New York.
394
00:16:11,901 --> 00:16:13,970
Uribe, a scout sent me
a link to your highlights
395
00:16:14,003 --> 00:16:14,805
in the Venezuelan league.
396
00:16:14,838 --> 00:16:16,473
I tracked you down that night.
397
00:16:16,506 --> 00:16:20,144
And, John Elton... John Elton.
398
00:16:20,176 --> 00:16:22,812
Honestly, that was a mistake.
399
00:16:22,845 --> 00:16:25,448
I asked an agent for Juan
Eltun, and he misheard me.
400
00:16:25,482 --> 00:16:26,517
But...
401
00:16:26,550 --> 00:16:28,819
Actually explains a lot.
402
00:16:28,852 --> 00:16:30,454
But you just hit the go-ahead home run.
403
00:16:30,487 --> 00:16:31,921
- Yeah.
- Yeah. -Yeah.
404
00:16:31,954 --> 00:16:33,389
If he can do that,
405
00:16:33,422 --> 00:16:35,792
just imagine what the
rest of you are capable of.
406
00:16:35,825 --> 00:16:37,026
- Yes!
- All right.
407
00:16:37,060 --> 00:16:39,829
I know this wasn't
your dream to be here,
408
00:16:39,863 --> 00:16:41,031
but it is mine.
409
00:16:41,064 --> 00:16:43,433
So please, someone get out
there and make a God damn play!
410
00:16:44,935 --> 00:16:47,170
- Let's go!
- Uno, dos, tres...
411
00:16:47,204 --> 00:16:49,573
Frackers!
412
00:16:49,606 --> 00:16:51,308
For you, Miss Jules! For you!
413
00:16:51,340 --> 00:16:53,409
Where'd you get that?
414
00:16:53,443 --> 00:16:54,912
I don't know.
415
00:16:54,944 --> 00:16:56,914
I just looked down, and there it was.
416
00:16:56,946 --> 00:16:59,515
Tell you what... I feel naked,
417
00:16:59,549 --> 00:17:02,520
uh, watching the game without
a microphone in my hand.
418
00:17:04,621 --> 00:17:05,823
How's this?
419
00:17:05,855 --> 00:17:07,123
Where'd you get that?
420
00:17:07,157 --> 00:17:08,425
I don't know.
421
00:17:08,458 --> 00:17:09,559
I just looked down, and it was there.
422
00:17:09,593 --> 00:17:12,528
- You're a prodigy. God damn you, prodigy.
- Thank you.
423
00:17:12,562 --> 00:17:14,298
All right, hey.
424
00:17:14,331 --> 00:17:16,433
Drunken idiots of Morristown...
425
00:17:16,466 --> 00:17:17,868
Yeah, hello.
426
00:17:17,901 --> 00:17:20,137
Turn your attention to the field.
427
00:17:20,170 --> 00:17:22,206
You will see the greatest victory
428
00:17:22,238 --> 00:17:24,507
in the history of Morristown right now.
429
00:17:24,540 --> 00:17:26,276
Come on, Frackers!
430
00:17:29,179 --> 00:17:31,247
From your lips to
Willie Stargell's ears.
431
00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:33,916
Come on now, Frackers!
Come on, cheer 'em.
432
00:17:33,949 --> 00:17:35,885
- Go, let's go!
- Oh, Yoshi.
433
00:17:35,919 --> 00:17:37,120
You got this, mang.
434
00:17:37,152 --> 00:17:38,555
Joo got this.
435
00:17:38,587 --> 00:17:41,424
Go, Yoshi.
436
00:17:41,458 --> 00:17:43,026
Come on, Yoshi!
437
00:18:04,314 --> 00:18:06,316
Oh, nice grab by Uribe.
438
00:18:07,277 --> 00:18:08,345
Round the horn.
439
00:18:20,363 --> 00:18:21,465
Out!
440
00:18:26,068 --> 00:18:28,938
Triple play! Triple play!
441
00:18:28,971 --> 00:18:31,307
Whoo!
442
00:18:32,374 --> 00:18:34,944
Yeah!
443
00:18:34,978 --> 00:18:37,346
We did it!
444
00:18:37,380 --> 00:18:38,681
I never seen it!
445
00:18:38,715 --> 00:18:41,184
I never seen a triple
play to win a game!
446
00:18:41,217 --> 00:18:44,153
Baseball lives in Morristown!
447
00:19:03,006 --> 00:19:04,641
Whoo!
448
00:19:04,673 --> 00:19:06,542
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
449
00:19:06,575 --> 00:19:08,377
Yeah, baby!
450
00:19:16,052 --> 00:19:18,455
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
451
00:19:19,522 --> 00:19:21,058
Oh, my God! Yeah!
452
00:19:33,769 --> 00:19:36,105
Well, good morning, sunshine.
453
00:19:36,139 --> 00:19:38,308
Hey.
454
00:19:40,826 --> 00:19:42,521
Uh...
455
00:19:44,459 --> 00:19:45,861
I'm sorry.
456
00:19:49,084 --> 00:19:52,355
Atlanta wants to audition
me to be their new announcer.
457
00:19:52,389 --> 00:19:55,693
They want me to finish off
the season at AAA New Orleans.
458
00:19:58,128 --> 00:19:59,295
Look, you know
459
00:19:59,328 --> 00:20:00,663
that if I have a path to The Show,
460
00:20:00,697 --> 00:20:03,534
I just... I have to take it.
461
00:20:04,093 --> 00:20:05,795
I know.
462
00:20:05,827 --> 00:20:09,164
Jules, come with me.
463
00:20:11,507 --> 00:20:13,744
You know I can't.
464
00:20:15,511 --> 00:20:18,315
I'm not going to abandon my team.
465
00:20:18,347 --> 00:20:19,382
Why not?
466
00:20:19,415 --> 00:20:21,350
God, you have this fantasy
that if you save the team,
467
00:20:21,383 --> 00:20:22,518
you're gonna save the town.
468
00:20:22,552 --> 00:20:25,355
But you're plugging a dam
with a dozen other leaks in it.
469
00:20:25,388 --> 00:20:28,125
How do you think this place
got to be the way it is?
470
00:20:28,158 --> 00:20:30,995
Anytime anybody made
anything, then they just left.
471
00:20:32,461 --> 00:20:34,096
If you really wanted me to come,
472
00:20:34,130 --> 00:20:35,732
you wouldn't have packed
your bags before you asked.
473
00:20:35,765 --> 00:20:38,468
Oh, screw the... hey.
Screw the bags, okay?
474
00:20:38,500 --> 00:20:40,603
- I want you with me. I love you.
- No!
475
00:20:40,636 --> 00:20:43,039
You don't get to say that while
you're walking out the door.
476
00:20:43,073 --> 00:20:46,509
Ah, see? This is why I did
not want to get involved, okay?
477
00:20:46,543 --> 00:20:48,210
- I didn't want get...
- Trapped?
478
00:20:48,244 --> 00:20:49,613
I wasn't gonna say "trapped," all right?
479
00:20:49,645 --> 00:20:51,313
I was gonna use a different
word than "trapped."
480
00:20:51,346 --> 00:20:53,517
A-a nicer word.
481
00:20:53,549 --> 00:20:55,084
Uh, enmeshed.
482
00:21:00,757 --> 00:21:02,324
I've never trapped a man in my life.
483
00:21:02,357 --> 00:21:03,626
You want to leave? Leave.
484
00:21:03,660 --> 00:21:05,171
Wha...
485
00:21:05,235 --> 00:21:07,363
I don't wanna leave. I
have to leave, Jules.
486
00:21:07,397 --> 00:21:08,068
I...
487
00:21:08,179 --> 00:21:10,334
Yeah, I know, sure.
488
00:21:15,138 --> 00:21:17,174
Take care of yourself.
489
00:21:22,679 --> 00:21:23,680
Wait.
490
00:21:27,549 --> 00:21:28,651
About a year from now,
491
00:21:28,684 --> 00:21:30,853
you're gonna realize the
colossal mistake you just made.
492
00:21:30,886 --> 00:21:32,521
You're gonna come crawling back.
493
00:21:32,555 --> 00:21:34,123
You're gonna want to fix it.
494
00:21:34,157 --> 00:21:36,660
You're gonna try to sweet-talk me.
495
00:21:36,692 --> 00:21:40,463
Let me save you the time
and tell you right now.
496
00:21:40,497 --> 00:21:42,690
Go fuck yourself.
497
00:21:42,754 --> 00:21:46,190
You're dead to me.
498
00:21:46,669 --> 00:21:48,205
Now you can go.
499
00:21:54,443 --> 00:21:56,105
Can I just... can I grab my bag?
500
00:21:56,111 --> 00:21:57,113
Leave!
501
00:22:00,150 --> 00:22:02,352
- Please?
- Now!
502
00:22:19,536 --> 00:22:21,371
Where's your luggage?
503
00:22:26,034 --> 00:22:28,344
I am going to get drunk and pass out.
504
00:22:31,547 --> 00:22:33,583
Wake me when we get to Louisiana.
505
00:22:33,615 --> 00:22:36,452
Sure thing.
506
00:22:45,495 --> 00:22:48,465
So, this, uh... this apartment
you're getting in New Orleans,
507
00:22:48,497 --> 00:22:49,900
I'm assuming it's a two-bedroom
508
00:22:49,932 --> 00:22:52,401
'cause I don't know if I
can handle a Bert and Ernie,
509
00:22:52,434 --> 00:22:54,303
twin-bed situation.
510
00:22:54,336 --> 00:22:57,406
I actually understood that reference.
511
00:22:57,447 --> 00:23:01,514
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- www.addic7ed.com -
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