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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
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The new firewall
has Hypervisor-Protected
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Code Integrity
and the OS 11.6 update has
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virtualization-based security
and automatic two-factor identification.
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Okay, well, sounds like
you have it under control.
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So a few of us were looking up
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Payne's political
contributions recently.
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Everyone is doing this dance.
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Some of the politicians we donate to
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are super conservative
on women's issues.
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Yeah, politics are so weird.
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How do you turn this thing?
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A lot of us think
that we shouldn't be supporting
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- people like that.
- Oh, there you go.
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Just have to hit that lock turn thing.
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We believe abortion rights
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are directly tied
to women's equal participation
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in society, and we think it's important
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for you to start upholding those values.
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Oh! Is it done?
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Great. Thank you so much.
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Um...
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I'm so sorry.
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Am I supposed to tip you?
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Lemme grab you something.
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- Synced and corrected by synk -
- www.MY-SUBS.com -
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I'm just sayin', all the buzz about this
has got me freaked out.
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Sack up. Access to safe, legal abortion
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is a human right.
It's as simple as that.
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- Right, Sade?
- Yes.
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I honestly can't tell if you're
screwing with me right now.
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I'm not. Why is that so hard to believe?
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Maybe because of who you are.
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All the things
you've ever said and done.
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- Okay.
- Look, Wesley's brush
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with humanity aside, we're being asked
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to take a position on
a very controversial situation.
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- Yeah.
- Who's asking for what now?
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- You didn't see the email?
- Mm.
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Went out company-wide this morning.
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- Mm-hmm.
- It's an open letter
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from some of our employees with requests
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regarding our abortion policies.
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"Requests" is not the word.
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They are demanding
that we develop protocols
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to provide abortion access
in pro-life states,
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stop donating to pro-life politicians,
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and that you personally disavow
those donations and apologize.
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"We require review, expect solutions,
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insist on an apology"?
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This reads like a ransom note.
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I get where they're coming from,
but the tone is a little harsh.
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It's generational, you know?
They're all entitled.
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They act like they're in charge
and they all know exactly what's right.
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And they're all bisexual,
but they barely have sex.
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It's like going
to an all-you-can-eat buffet,
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but you're on a diet.
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Do we donate to pro-life politicians?
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'Cause if we do, it's kind of weird.
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I don't know who we donate to.
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I don't make these decisions.
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Our lobbyists handle all that.
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So how do you think we should respond?
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Well, we can't just roll over.
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I mean, what happens when
our pro-life employees
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decide to write a different letter?
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I agree. This is a business.
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We can't run it like a democracy.
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I just worry that if we don't respond,
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the narrative will be
that Katherine Hastings
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doesn't support women.
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- I don't support women?
- I'm not saying that.
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I'm saying that the narrative
would say that.
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- Headlines, gossip.
- It would probably go
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on your Wiki under "Controversies."
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"Katherine Hastings
is famously anti-woman."
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Fine, I guess it doesn't hurt
to show them what
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our out-of-state protocols are.
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Elliot, what is our policy, by the way?
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Post-Dobbs, uh, well,
our official policy
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is, um, we need to formulate
an official policy.
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- I'll write it.
- God no.
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You're [bleep] with us, right?
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Well, let me just try a first draft.
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This thing is very complicated, okay,
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but if you send me your thoughts,
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I'll format them and proof them
and then throw them
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- in the trash and I'll give...
- Ugh.
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You something sensible this afternoon.
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Great, then maybe we could,
I don't know, try to sell a car.
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Wouldn't that be crazy?
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The annoying thing is,
I am probably more pro-choice
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than any of these people.
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I mean, my generation fought
for those rights.
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I remember how it was before Roe.
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- Weren't you, like, five?
- I mean,
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people have memories
from when they're five.
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Yeah, but just cartoons and stuff.
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All right, Katherine,
here's your Green Detox.
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I added bee pollen for $4,
so that's $4 worth of bee pollen.
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Great. Thank you, Dori. Oh, Dori,
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if anyone who signs this wants
to come see me,
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just get rid of 'em.
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Oh, I signed that letter.
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- Oh, you're serious? Oh.
- Mm-hmm.
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Right there. See?
On the right, Dorothy Otis.
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I... I wish you'd talked to me.
It's kind of awkward,
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having my own assistant call me out.
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Sorry. I didn't mean to ambush you.
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- Next time, I'll tell you first.
- Oh, great.
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- Mm-hmm.
- Thank you. It's okay.
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Could... could you just do me
a favor, though,
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and... and take it off?
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It just kind of makes me look bad.
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I'd rather not do that.
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- This is important.
- I agree.
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Which is why I'm saying no.
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I'm just gonna jump on in here.
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Looks like there's a lot
of feelings being expressed
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here and that is so healthy,
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but do you know what's funny is
that I think politically,
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we're on the same side.
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Except for my generation actually fights
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- for our beliefs.
- We're both Gen Y.
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No, I'm Young Y. You Old Y.
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Okay, that's not how it works.
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I hate to pull rank here,
Dori, but I'm your boss.
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Just 'cause you're my boss, Katherine,
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doesn't mean you get
to tell me what to do.
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That is the definition of a boss.
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Y is Y. It's all one generation.
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Sorry, pal.
I've got a legal meeting in here now.
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I don't think so.
I have a design meeting.
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No, no, I've got it, uh,
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here we go, Conference Room B,
11:00 a.m., Legal.
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11:00, Design. Did they double-book?
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No one double-booked.
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You fell for my ruse.
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I wanted to make sure
you couldn't make excuses
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about other stuff you had to do,
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so I made appointments
in each of your calendars,
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specifically designed to lure you here.
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Why does my calendar say there's
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a hot dog eating contest
in here right now?
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- Was that a mistake?
- No mistake, my friend.
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You're right where you need to be.
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Have a seat. I'd like to welcome
all of you to the inaugural meeting
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of the Payne Women's Committee.
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Ah, shoot.
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Uh, must be a dud.
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Okay, okay, okay, just imagine a bunch
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of sparkles and a loud bang.
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The Payne Women's Committee?
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If we let Elliot and his bean counters
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in charge of our abortion policy,
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it's gonna be all rules
and restrictions.
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Plus, I think this is
just a good chance for us
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to show that we can be more
supportive of women, right?
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The sarcasm isn't a good look.
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I'm not being...
Is it so hard to believe
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that Wesley Payne might just be
a little bit enlightened?
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I do find it weird that
the Payne Women's Committee
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is four dudes.
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Huh. No, that's a good point.
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I didn't even think of that.
This is why we need your input.
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Wesley, I respect what you're doing.
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I... well, strike that.
I somewhat understand
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what it is that you're doing,
and I would love to help...
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Uh, well, you should probably
strike that as well.
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But this is very hard,
it's very complicated,
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so just leave it
to the professionals, yeah?
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Oh, it's a sign! Let's get started!
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I mean, it's not like I asked
Dori to compromise her values.
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Outside of work,
I don't care what she does.
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I don't even ask.
Is she married? No idea.
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Does she have kids?
Don't know. Don't care.
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I'm sure she appreciates
how you never ask her
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- about herself.
- You know, I have plenty
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of beliefs that I don't bring
into the office.
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- I think it's wrong to eat veal.
- Mm-hmm.
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I... I don't think that men
should dye their hair
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under almost any circumstance.
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I mean, I think the whole idea
of God is pretty far-fetched.
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Yeah, I'd keep that one quiet.
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Yeah, no, exactly...
I keep my opinions to myself
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because I am the CEO, and I
can't afford to alienate our customers.
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Well, these people,
they just wanna feel heard.
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If you could just meet with them
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and let them express their feelings...
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Like a therapist? Why is that my job?
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You don't have to do anything
they're asking or even respond.
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Just, like, a few minutes
of listening...
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And we can put this all
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- behind us.
- Great, fine.
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- If you really think it'll help.
- I do.
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Just being there with them
will validate them.
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Validation, it's...
It's a pretty big thing for us.
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Them.
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Yes, them/us.
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All us millenials.
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Just make them feel heard.
Don't try to correct them
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or explain anything.
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Even if you are right,
if you argue with them,
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- you're wrong.
- Got it.
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Yeah, I've done a lot
of pointless couples therapy.
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I know how to fake an open mind.
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Well, well, well. Good afternoon.
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We look forward
to a productive dialogue.
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Oh, great. Dorothy's here. Both: Mm-hmm.
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So we guarantee their travel,
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we give 'em an appropriate
amount of time off,
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and we voice our support.
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That's all the hard stuff.
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All that's left is little details.
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00:07:06,730 --> 00:07:08,812
The little details
are the hard stuff, okay?
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Are we flying them first or coach?
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00:07:10,645 --> 00:07:12,561
Are we allowing them
to take a partner with them?
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How much are we willing to reimburse?
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It's just, uh, all-expenses-paid.
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All-expenses-paid is not
a legal concept.
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00:07:18,059 --> 00:07:19,974
It's just something they say
on "The Price Is Right."
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00:07:19,974 --> 00:07:21,640
Are we also gonna pay for lodging?
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Yes, duh.
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How long would they be there for?
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I had a week off after
I had my wisdom teeth out.
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- Does that help?
- It does not.
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If only there was a woman around
to help with this kind of thing?
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Well, why don't we just say,
we'll put them up
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in a hotel for as long as needed?
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Yes, a hotel. Uh, what quality of hotel?
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I don't know, uh, someplace decent.
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- A Marriott.
- Mm...
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Eh, that's like, "Eh."
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00:07:41,716 --> 00:07:43,882
- Courtyard Marriott.
- Oh, Jack.
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Haven't these women been through enough?
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Thank you all for coming.
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00:07:47,630 --> 00:07:51,795
I'm Sadie Ryan. I'm the chief
communications officer here at Payne.
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My pronouns are she and her,
and I'd like to introduce you to someone
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that's been named on "Forbes'"
Most Powerful Women list
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00:07:57,834 --> 00:07:59,584
for more years than I can count.
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00:08:00,875 --> 00:08:03,749
And I'm just, like, really glad
that this ceiling isn't made of glass;
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00:08:03,749 --> 00:08:05,581
- otherwise she'd shatter it.
- Oh, gosh.
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00:08:05,581 --> 00:08:07,872
- Katherine Hastings.
- Hi there.
243
00:08:07,872 --> 00:08:11,287
Hi. Uh, no speech. I'm here to listen.
244
00:08:11,287 --> 00:08:15,036
Oh, uh, my pronouns are she/her.
245
00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:17,160
Um, she's/hers.
246
00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:20,034
I guess "we/us," you know,
when it's appropriate.
247
00:08:20,034 --> 00:08:21,825
"You" is fine,
unless it's like, "Hey, you."
248
00:08:21,825 --> 00:08:23,283
In which case...
249
00:08:23,283 --> 00:08:24,449
- I don't like that.
- Yeah.
250
00:08:24,449 --> 00:08:26,073
Anyway, here to listen.
251
00:08:26,073 --> 00:08:27,489
- I'm done.
- I'll go first.
252
00:08:27,489 --> 00:08:28,947
Yeah.
253
00:08:28,947 --> 00:08:32,737
When we express our concerns to you,
you've dismissed our opinions.
254
00:08:32,737 --> 00:08:35,485
It makes us feel like you see
us as functions and not people.
255
00:08:35,485 --> 00:08:38,359
That attitude is hurtful, and,
you know, it makes me feel...
256
00:08:38,359 --> 00:08:40,359
It makes us...
257
00:08:40,359 --> 00:08:41,609
- Yeah.
- Feel like we're being
258
00:08:41,609 --> 00:08:43,608
taken for granted.
259
00:08:43,608 --> 00:08:45,357
Oh, well, thank you.
260
00:08:45,357 --> 00:08:47,064
I certainly... I hear that.
261
00:08:47,064 --> 00:08:48,522
Also, when you order your coffee,
262
00:08:48,522 --> 00:08:50,105
you gotta let me know
ahead of time, Katherine,
263
00:08:50,105 --> 00:08:53,395
if you want decaf, okay?
I'm not a mind reader.
264
00:08:53,395 --> 00:08:54,437
And I'm done.
265
00:08:54,437 --> 00:08:55,519
Fair point.
266
00:08:55,519 --> 00:08:57,227
Um, I'll go next.
267
00:08:57,227 --> 00:08:59,643
Oh. Hi, Chloe.
268
00:08:59,643 --> 00:09:02,350
There's a special place in hell
for women who don't support women.
269
00:09:02,350 --> 00:09:03,683
You're a traitor.
270
00:09:03,683 --> 00:09:05,308
- Ooh, boy.
- Oh, that's a little harsh.
271
00:09:05,308 --> 00:09:07,265
Yeah.
272
00:09:07,265 --> 00:09:10,306
And then back home,
everybody gets an Edible Arrangement.
273
00:09:10,306 --> 00:09:12,430
The cantaloupe one, though.
We don't need to go crazy.
274
00:09:12,430 --> 00:09:14,845
Good job, guys. I think we're done.
275
00:09:14,845 --> 00:09:16,969
Uh, we are not even close to being done.
276
00:09:16,969 --> 00:09:19,343
Is there a lifetime benefit cap?
277
00:09:19,343 --> 00:09:21,134
Uh, which state do they go to?
278
00:09:21,134 --> 00:09:23,009
Is there a time limit
by which they have to apply?
279
00:09:23,009 --> 00:09:24,550
Uh, some women don't even
know they're pregnant
280
00:09:24,550 --> 00:09:25,632
- for a while.
- Well, okay.
281
00:09:25,632 --> 00:09:27,965
Uh, when do they usually find out by?
282
00:09:27,965 --> 00:09:30,256
In what world would you look
to me for this?
283
00:09:30,256 --> 00:09:31,880
You know a ton of random stuff.
284
00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:33,588
About topics I find interesting.
285
00:09:33,588 --> 00:09:34,795
I am pretty sure it has something to do
286
00:09:34,795 --> 00:09:36,712
- with a "pap shmeer," right?
- Pap smear.
287
00:09:36,712 --> 00:09:38,836
I wanna say, like, a... A moon cycle?
288
00:09:38,836 --> 00:09:41,334
Uh, something to do with the moon.
289
00:09:41,334 --> 00:09:44,167
Should we maybe ask
some women about this?
290
00:09:44,167 --> 00:09:47,249
Yes, Wesley.
I, um, think that we should.
291
00:09:47,249 --> 00:09:48,832
This is, without a doubt,
292
00:09:48,832 --> 00:09:51,330
the worst time
in human history to be a woman.
293
00:09:51,330 --> 00:09:53,454
- Group: Yes.
- Really?
294
00:09:53,454 --> 00:09:55,579
- Now's the worst time?
- Just go with it.
295
00:09:55,579 --> 00:09:57,578
I certainly hear that opinion.
296
00:09:57,578 --> 00:09:59,327
While this is an issue
that disproportionately
297
00:09:59,327 --> 00:10:00,827
affects employees with uteri,
298
00:10:00,827 --> 00:10:03,617
men have to speak out to support them.
299
00:10:03,617 --> 00:10:05,867
- It ends now.
- Yes, that is great.
300
00:10:05,867 --> 00:10:07,740
You, sir, are great.
301
00:10:07,740 --> 00:10:09,698
You can't claim to be a feminist
302
00:10:09,698 --> 00:10:12,364
but then give money
to people who hate feminism.
303
00:10:13,821 --> 00:10:16,654
Um, I... you know, I probably
shouldn't say anything.
304
00:10:16,654 --> 00:10:18,153
- Then... then don't.
- No.
305
00:10:18,153 --> 00:10:20,861
It's just, you know, just...
Just... just... just to clarify,
306
00:10:20,861 --> 00:10:23,984
our lobbying firm makes
these decisions, okay?
307
00:10:23,984 --> 00:10:25,316
You're the CEO.
308
00:10:25,316 --> 00:10:26,816
I told you not to say anything.
309
00:10:26,816 --> 00:10:28,815
You know who else just did
what they were told?
310
00:10:28,815 --> 00:10:29,982
The Nazis.
311
00:10:29,982 --> 00:10:31,689
Oh, yeah. Come on.
312
00:10:31,689 --> 00:10:33,813
Do you pledge to disavow these donations
313
00:10:33,813 --> 00:10:37,146
and publicly apologize
for your role in enabling them?
314
00:10:37,146 --> 00:10:38,811
Just gonna jump on in here.
315
00:10:38,811 --> 00:10:41,810
Uh, today was really more
about listening.
316
00:10:41,810 --> 00:10:44,101
Yes, this was the beginning
of a great dialogue, guys.
317
00:10:44,101 --> 00:10:46,142
- My door is always open.
- That's a lie, y'all.
318
00:10:46,142 --> 00:10:48,932
Her door is booby-trapped shut
and it got me in front of it.
319
00:10:48,932 --> 00:10:50,057
That's not helpful.
320
00:10:50,057 --> 00:10:53,681
By not speaking out, you are
literally being violent against women.
321
00:10:53,681 --> 00:10:56,887
I am not literally
being violent to anyone.
322
00:10:56,887 --> 00:10:59,345
- Silence is violence.
- Okay, you know what?
323
00:10:59,345 --> 00:11:01,344
That's a catchy slogan and it rhymes,
324
00:11:01,344 --> 00:11:02,760
but it is just a fact
325
00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:05,134
that silence is not literally violence.
326
00:11:05,134 --> 00:11:08,299
Mm-kay, I think today was
a really productive first...
327
00:11:08,299 --> 00:11:10,091
- Group: Silence is violence.
- Yeah.
328
00:11:10,091 --> 00:11:11,631
- Group: Silence is violence.
- You guys are...
329
00:11:11,631 --> 00:11:14,297
You cannot just change
the definition of a word
330
00:11:14,297 --> 00:11:17,462
because you were born after
the "Seinfeld" finale, okay?
331
00:11:17,462 --> 00:11:19,795
Google "Khmer Rouge." Google "Rwanda."
332
00:11:19,795 --> 00:11:22,293
Google "Black Friday at Walmart."
333
00:11:22,293 --> 00:11:24,459
The world is full of violent people,
334
00:11:24,459 --> 00:11:26,459
but I am not one of them!
335
00:11:26,459 --> 00:11:28,041
- I am a person who beli...
- Oh!
336
00:11:30,249 --> 00:11:31,457
Oh!
337
00:11:31,457 --> 00:11:32,456
- I'm fine. I'm fine.
- Oh!
338
00:11:32,456 --> 00:11:34,248
- Oh.
- I'm fine. I'm fine.
339
00:11:34,248 --> 00:11:35,330
- Oh, my God.
- No, it's fine.
340
00:11:35,330 --> 00:11:36,621
- I feel actually fine.
- Oh.
341
00:11:36,621 --> 00:11:38,246
It's just a cheap shirt.
342
00:11:38,246 --> 00:11:39,683
This is Amazon Essentials, honestly.
343
00:11:39,762 --> 00:11:41,627
- Oh, my God, oh, my God...
- Oh, my God...
344
00:11:42,821 --> 00:11:44,690
Workplace violence is defined as the act
345
00:11:44,708 --> 00:11:48,670
or threat of violence, and it
ranges from verbal abuse to actual...
346
00:11:48,670 --> 00:11:50,882
I appreciate the company, but
you don't have to stay here.
347
00:11:50,882 --> 00:11:52,258
No, I don't mind.
348
00:11:52,258 --> 00:11:54,343
It's always good to have a refresher.
349
00:11:54,343 --> 00:11:57,221
Excuse me, would you, uh,
pay attention to the video?
350
00:11:57,221 --> 00:11:59,348
I already know
what workplace violence is.
351
00:11:59,348 --> 00:12:00,726
I don't need the video.
352
00:12:00,726 --> 00:12:03,061
We have to show it to anyone
who's been reported for an incident.
353
00:12:03,061 --> 00:12:04,897
Can't find any exceptions for CEOs.
354
00:12:04,897 --> 00:12:06,148
Got it. You're very important.
355
00:12:06,148 --> 00:12:07,816
- Thank you.
- There are several factors
356
00:12:07,816 --> 00:12:10,152
that can make
a hostile work environment.
357
00:12:10,152 --> 00:12:11,779
You know, when I was coming up,
358
00:12:11,779 --> 00:12:14,115
a hostile work environment was the goal.
359
00:12:14,115 --> 00:12:16,826
My bosses would attack every weakness,
360
00:12:16,826 --> 00:12:19,162
especially if you were a woman.
361
00:12:19,162 --> 00:12:21,331
Now I'm the boss, and it's all "Be kind.
362
00:12:21,331 --> 00:12:22,750
Make everyone feel heard."
363
00:12:22,750 --> 00:12:25,169
Um, there's gonna be a quiz after.
364
00:12:25,169 --> 00:12:26,212
I don't need the quiz.
365
00:12:26,212 --> 00:12:28,130
Right, yeah. No, you don't.
366
00:12:29,548 --> 00:12:31,158
But you do have
to take the quiz, though.
367
00:12:31,183 --> 00:12:32,344
See?
368
00:12:32,344 --> 00:12:34,888
CEO of the company, and even
this pissy little eunuch
369
00:12:34,888 --> 00:12:36,014
gets to tell me what to do.
370
00:12:36,014 --> 00:12:40,060
Well, maybe it's a good thing
that we're ending this cycle of abuse.
371
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:42,605
It's just, I worked really hard.
372
00:12:42,605 --> 00:12:44,524
I paid my dues to get to the top.
373
00:12:44,524 --> 00:12:45,817
- Mm.
- And I made a lot
374
00:12:45,817 --> 00:12:49,612
of sacrifices along the way,
in my personal life, in my work life,
375
00:12:49,612 --> 00:12:52,323
and then it's like they just
went and changed all the rules.
376
00:12:52,323 --> 00:12:54,660
I just don't know where I fit anymore.
377
00:12:56,912 --> 00:12:58,163
Hey.
378
00:12:58,163 --> 00:12:59,748
Um, Katherine?
379
00:12:59,748 --> 00:13:02,709
Calling me a "pissy little eunuch"
felt like bullying, and...
380
00:13:02,709 --> 00:13:05,380
Okay, scold me again
and see what happens, Tom.
381
00:13:05,380 --> 00:13:07,132
See what [bleep] happens.
382
00:13:07,132 --> 00:13:08,883
You want some of what she got?
383
00:13:08,883 --> 00:13:11,427
We thought it was important,
in the name of inclusivity,
384
00:13:11,427 --> 00:13:13,805
to get your input on this because we
385
00:13:13,805 --> 00:13:15,516
in the Payne Women's Committee believe
386
00:13:15,516 --> 00:13:17,726
that women should always be on top.
387
00:13:17,726 --> 00:13:19,728
That's not our official slogan.
388
00:13:19,728 --> 00:13:22,148
Uh, we are very open
to any suggestions you may have
389
00:13:22,148 --> 00:13:24,693
of ways to improve, you know,
health and safety for, uh...
390
00:13:24,693 --> 00:13:26,653
- Ooh, yes?
- I think we need more lights
391
00:13:26,653 --> 00:13:27,867
in the parking lot.
392
00:13:27,892 --> 00:13:30,407
A number of us feel unsafe
walking to our cars at night.
393
00:13:30,407 --> 00:13:32,159
Sorry, I should have been more clear.
394
00:13:32,159 --> 00:13:33,743
Um, we're looking for... for,
you know, health and safety,
395
00:13:33,743 --> 00:13:37,206
uh, advances that are specific
to, um, you know, abortions.
396
00:13:37,206 --> 00:13:39,292
Oh, it's just sometimes
I hear footsteps...
397
00:13:39,292 --> 00:13:41,252
- Oh, lady in glasses.
- Why is this something
398
00:13:41,252 --> 00:13:43,254
being worked on by four men?
399
00:13:43,254 --> 00:13:44,672
I've been sayin' that all day.
400
00:13:44,672 --> 00:13:46,258
- Kiss-ass.
- Uh, well, it was actually
401
00:13:46,258 --> 00:13:47,759
supposed to be worked on by one man.
402
00:13:47,759 --> 00:13:49,344
It's just these guys sort of
horned in, you know?
403
00:13:49,344 --> 00:13:51,430
Um, I'm pro-life, and I don't think
404
00:13:51,430 --> 00:13:52,973
our company should be doing any of...
405
00:13:52,973 --> 00:13:54,266
How can you say that, Joy?
406
00:13:54,266 --> 00:13:56,311
Uh, okay. Come on, ladies.
Let's not, uh...
407
00:13:56,311 --> 00:13:57,729
I can't believe
that you would even think
408
00:13:57,729 --> 00:13:59,647
- something like that.
- I have a right to my opinion.
409
00:13:59,647 --> 00:14:00,940
- This is a fun turn.
- Guys,
410
00:14:00,940 --> 00:14:03,485
this isn't a discussion
we should be having.
411
00:14:03,485 --> 00:14:05,528
- Let's move on.
- Thank you. Please.
412
00:14:05,528 --> 00:14:07,490
I was told I can't bring
my iguana to work even though
413
00:14:07,490 --> 00:14:09,283
he's a state-recognized support animal.
414
00:14:09,283 --> 00:14:10,701
So we can talk about iguanas
415
00:14:10,701 --> 00:14:12,453
but we can't talk about
lighting in the parking lot?
416
00:14:12,453 --> 00:14:14,455
Well, I think both topics
are something that were
417
00:14:14,455 --> 00:14:15,789
- getting a little bit off...
- So am I not allowed
418
00:14:15,789 --> 00:14:17,876
to express my opinion
that abortion is wrong?
419
00:14:17,876 --> 00:14:19,628
It's just not what
this meeting is about.
420
00:14:19,628 --> 00:14:21,087
If this were a party-planning meeting,
421
00:14:21,087 --> 00:14:22,672
you could suggest "Under the Sea"
422
00:14:22,672 --> 00:14:25,300
or the "Roaring Twenties,"
but you can't just say,
423
00:14:25,300 --> 00:14:26,802
"Let's ban all parties."
424
00:14:26,802 --> 00:14:28,221
You banned the party I wanted to do.
425
00:14:28,221 --> 00:14:30,723
We're not doing a "Pimps
'n' Hos Christmas," Mandy.
426
00:14:30,723 --> 00:14:32,058
Nobody wants that.
427
00:14:32,058 --> 00:14:33,434
- Speak for me much?
- I think we're getting away
428
00:14:33,434 --> 00:14:35,311
from the... the main topic here,
which is, you know,
429
00:14:35,311 --> 00:14:38,148
if you were to have an abortion,
uh, you know, or not, obviously,
430
00:14:38,148 --> 00:14:39,316
but... but if you were,
431
00:14:39,316 --> 00:14:43,237
then which hotel chain would you prefer?
432
00:14:43,237 --> 00:14:46,323
Fine. I guess, La Quinta?
433
00:14:46,323 --> 00:14:47,908
Are you [bleep] kidding me, Joy?
434
00:14:47,908 --> 00:14:50,954
La Quinta is good.
Stop trying to muzzle me.
435
00:14:50,954 --> 00:14:52,747
A support iguana is a medical device.
436
00:14:52,747 --> 00:14:54,290
- But listen, just calm down.
- I'm feeling
437
00:14:54,290 --> 00:14:56,584
discriminated against,
and I'm going to HR.
438
00:14:56,584 --> 00:14:57,919
- What? No, no, no, no.
- I'll go with you.
439
00:14:57,919 --> 00:14:59,421
- Don't go to HR.
- No HR.
440
00:14:59,421 --> 00:15:00,881
- Please don't go to HR.
- La Quinta Inns
441
00:15:00,881 --> 00:15:03,008
and La Quinta Suites offer
very different experiences.
442
00:15:03,008 --> 00:15:05,886
- You can't all go to HR.
- It's the same parent company
443
00:15:05,886 --> 00:15:08,639
but with two vastly different products.
444
00:15:08,639 --> 00:15:10,600
- It was like, "Ooh."
- Hey.
445
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,561
This is a... This is a cool spot.
446
00:15:12,561 --> 00:15:13,728
Sadie, how's your nose?
447
00:15:13,728 --> 00:15:15,438
- Looks worse than it is.
- Okay.
448
00:15:15,438 --> 00:15:17,440
Luckily, I always keep
a clean shirt in my car.
449
00:15:17,440 --> 00:15:18,692
Are you gonna press charges?
450
00:15:18,692 --> 00:15:20,820
Against Katherine? It was an accident.
451
00:15:20,820 --> 00:15:23,364
I basically ran into her fist.
452
00:15:23,364 --> 00:15:24,615
I realize that sounds like something
453
00:15:24,615 --> 00:15:26,826
a battered wife would say
or battered husband,
454
00:15:26,826 --> 00:15:29,203
battered partner, anyone
that gets battered, really.
455
00:15:29,203 --> 00:15:31,957
I don't feel safe having
someone like that in charge.
456
00:15:31,957 --> 00:15:33,041
She needs to resign.
457
00:15:33,041 --> 00:15:34,084
- What?
- Whoa.
458
00:15:34,084 --> 00:15:35,127
We should write a letter.
459
00:15:35,127 --> 00:15:37,880
Another letter? So many letters.
460
00:15:37,880 --> 00:15:39,840
It's like, when do you guys
have time to work?
461
00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:41,926
It doesn't really seem like getting rid
462
00:15:41,926 --> 00:15:45,346
of our first female CEO
is exactly, like,
463
00:15:45,346 --> 00:15:47,807
- "Whoo, feminism."
- You saw what happened.
464
00:15:47,807 --> 00:15:49,976
- She's unhinged.
- It was an accident.
465
00:15:49,976 --> 00:15:51,395
It was like one of those hilarious,
466
00:15:51,395 --> 00:15:53,397
random things that happen, you know?
467
00:15:53,397 --> 00:15:55,357
You're defending her?
468
00:15:55,357 --> 00:15:57,276
Your generation really doesn't get it.
469
00:15:57,276 --> 00:15:58,986
My generation?
Girl, how old do you think...
470
00:15:58,986 --> 00:16:00,905
It's not your fault. People your age
471
00:16:00,905 --> 00:16:02,782
have a lot of internalized misogyny.
472
00:16:02,782 --> 00:16:04,826
- Mm-hmm.
- We have what now?
473
00:16:04,826 --> 00:16:07,204
Now, at this point,
you might be thinking,
474
00:16:07,204 --> 00:16:09,623
"If I have to worry
that everything I say
475
00:16:09,623 --> 00:16:12,083
may offend someone,
I just won't speak it all."
476
00:16:12,083 --> 00:16:14,879
But that, too, is a form of harassment.
477
00:16:14,879 --> 00:16:16,923
Hey, Wesley, remember when I told you
478
00:16:16,923 --> 00:16:19,217
this was a complicated issue
best left to the professionals?
479
00:16:19,217 --> 00:16:21,594
When did everyone get
so sensitive about everything?
480
00:16:21,594 --> 00:16:23,639
It's like you can't even
have a nice little innocent
481
00:16:23,639 --> 00:16:26,517
workplace conversation
about abortion anymore.
482
00:16:26,517 --> 00:16:28,852
Sometimes I miss the assembly line.
483
00:16:28,852 --> 00:16:31,480
Nine rivets, press the button,
nine rivets, press the button.
484
00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:32,981
It was so simple.
485
00:16:32,981 --> 00:16:36,486
Shut up and watch the video,
you pissy little eunuchs!
486
00:16:36,486 --> 00:16:38,780
Make a hostile work environment.
487
00:16:38,780 --> 00:16:41,616
How did I go
from strong independent woman
488
00:16:41,616 --> 00:16:43,828
to tool of the patriarchy
who needs to resign?
489
00:16:43,828 --> 00:16:47,623
You know, I think it's
a mixture of success and age.
490
00:16:47,623 --> 00:16:49,667
- Just success mostly, though.
- Mm-hmm.
491
00:16:49,667 --> 00:16:51,252
Got you a green smoothie.
492
00:16:51,252 --> 00:16:54,004
- Oh, okay. Thanks.
- Got me one too.
493
00:16:54,004 --> 00:16:56,383
- I put them both on your card.
- Oh.
494
00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:57,467
You didn't happen to get one for me?
495
00:16:57,467 --> 00:16:59,010
It doesn't matter. I'm not thirsty.
496
00:16:59,010 --> 00:17:01,054
So...
497
00:17:01,054 --> 00:17:03,974
I heard there's gonna be another letter.
498
00:17:03,974 --> 00:17:06,102
If you feel you need
to sign it, I won't be mad.
499
00:17:06,102 --> 00:17:07,395
I'm not signing that.
500
00:17:07,395 --> 00:17:09,230
I'm not one of them overly sensitive,
501
00:17:09,230 --> 00:17:12,525
E-juice vapin', single-wheel
skateboarding children.
502
00:17:12,525 --> 00:17:14,026
They don't even respect their elders.
503
00:17:16,446 --> 00:17:17,865
It's nice to have you back, Dori.
504
00:17:17,865 --> 00:17:20,242
Makin' ramen noodles all fancy.
505
00:17:20,267 --> 00:17:21,774
Who puts mint in ramen?
506
00:17:22,956 --> 00:17:24,197
Chicken in the NyQuil,
can y'all believe this?
507
00:17:24,212 --> 00:17:25,718
I love how they're all talking about
508
00:17:25,743 --> 00:17:27,681
"breaking norms" and being so original,
509
00:17:27,706 --> 00:17:29,750
and then they all follow
the same trends.
510
00:17:29,750 --> 00:17:31,877
It's like, "I am such an individual."
511
00:17:31,877 --> 00:17:33,922
"Now watch me do
the exact same TikTok dance
512
00:17:33,922 --> 00:17:36,424
that, like, 4 million
other people are doing."
513
00:17:36,424 --> 00:17:38,093
And they always talking about
"deadass this"
514
00:17:38,093 --> 00:17:39,344
- and "deadass that."
- Mm.
515
00:17:39,344 --> 00:17:41,764
Y'all, what in the hell is a dead ass?
516
00:17:41,764 --> 00:17:43,182
I have no idea.
517
00:17:43,182 --> 00:17:45,936
And they wanna be famous
for doing nothing
518
00:17:45,936 --> 00:17:47,270
except being themselves.
519
00:17:47,270 --> 00:17:49,398
Do something
that makes the world better.
520
00:17:49,398 --> 00:17:50,399
- I know.
- Being a influencer
521
00:17:50,399 --> 00:17:51,566
ain't revolutionary.
522
00:17:51,566 --> 00:17:52,777
It's just like being the popular kid
523
00:17:52,777 --> 00:17:54,237
- in high school.
- And they are all just
524
00:17:54,237 --> 00:17:56,781
so morally pure and holier than thou.
525
00:17:56,781 --> 00:17:58,617
They not all that pure, Katherine.
526
00:17:58,617 --> 00:18:00,619
What do you mean?
527
00:18:00,619 --> 00:18:02,454
Well, Hazel claims
to not like Dave Chappelle,
528
00:18:02,454 --> 00:18:04,499
but she be at every one
of his live shows.
529
00:18:04,499 --> 00:18:07,627
And Breanna eats Chick-fil-A every day.
530
00:18:07,627 --> 00:18:09,754
I could keep going, but let me stop.
531
00:18:09,754 --> 00:18:11,465
No, please, keep going.
532
00:18:11,465 --> 00:18:13,592
Well, Natasha say
she don't like Michael Jackson,
533
00:18:13,592 --> 00:18:15,344
but she be doing
the "Remember the Time" dance
534
00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:18,140
on her lunch break.
535
00:18:18,140 --> 00:18:20,726
Inauspicious start
to the Payne Women's Committee.
536
00:18:20,726 --> 00:18:22,687
Here I am, a man trying to correct
537
00:18:22,687 --> 00:18:25,356
the mistakes of the past,
but I'm still the bad guy?
538
00:18:25,356 --> 00:18:26,774
I don't get it. Are we just supposed
539
00:18:26,774 --> 00:18:28,986
to sit around and wait until
a woman needs us
540
00:18:28,986 --> 00:18:30,070
to change a light bulb?
541
00:18:30,070 --> 00:18:33,115
I got asked to change
three different light bulbs last week,
542
00:18:33,115 --> 00:18:35,744
and I had to stand on a rolling
desk chair for one of 'em.
543
00:18:35,744 --> 00:18:37,871
You ever notice how when
they have to evacuate a ship,
544
00:18:37,871 --> 00:18:39,706
it's always women and children first?
545
00:18:39,706 --> 00:18:41,584
- Mm.
- Okay, I get the children,
546
00:18:41,584 --> 00:18:44,378
but why are men somehow
more disposable than women?
547
00:18:44,378 --> 00:18:46,172
But why do I have to change
the big plastic jug
548
00:18:46,172 --> 00:18:48,550
on top of the water cooler?
You know, I've got a bad back.
549
00:18:48,550 --> 00:18:50,635
Ugh, I hate being asked to change those.
550
00:18:50,635 --> 00:18:53,723
- Me too.
- #MeThree.
551
00:18:53,723 --> 00:18:55,516
Mm.
552
00:18:55,516 --> 00:18:57,352
Thank you all for joining me again.
553
00:18:57,352 --> 00:18:59,730
I am an imperfect person.
554
00:18:59,730 --> 00:19:02,524
I have a lot of decisions to make,
555
00:19:02,524 --> 00:19:06,929
and sometimes... a lot of times...
I screw up, so I'm sorry.
556
00:19:07,697 --> 00:19:10,658
Just like... I imagine Ruby is sorry
557
00:19:10,658 --> 00:19:12,119
for the times that she screwed up.
558
00:19:12,119 --> 00:19:13,371
- Excuse me?
- Oh, you know,
559
00:19:13,371 --> 00:19:14,538
the whole Malala thing.
560
00:19:14,538 --> 00:19:17,918
Yeah, she darkened her skin
for a Malala Halloween costume.
561
00:19:17,918 --> 00:19:19,378
That was six years ago.
562
00:19:19,378 --> 00:19:20,629
Yeah, well,
the Internet's forever, Ruby.
563
00:19:20,629 --> 00:19:21,838
Don't defend yourself. That's gross.
564
00:19:21,838 --> 00:19:23,716
I know that ain't Miss Harper talkin',
565
00:19:23,716 --> 00:19:26,552
the one who goes on and on
and on about trans rights
566
00:19:26,552 --> 00:19:29,305
but loves "Mrs. Doubtfire."
567
00:19:29,305 --> 00:19:30,933
- What?
- You're such a hypocrite.
568
00:19:30,933 --> 00:19:32,559
Well, we all make mistakes.
569
00:19:32,559 --> 00:19:34,812
What did, uh... What did Chloe do again?
570
00:19:34,812 --> 00:19:36,856
Big R. Kelly fan.
571
00:19:36,856 --> 00:19:40,026
I don't.
I separate the artist from the art.
572
00:19:40,026 --> 00:19:41,653
That is super problematic.
573
00:19:41,653 --> 00:19:43,447
Whatever. Sasha voted for Kanye.
574
00:19:43,447 --> 00:19:45,032
Well, sounds like you guys
575
00:19:45,032 --> 00:19:47,952
have a lot to discuss amongst
yourselves, so just have fun.
576
00:19:47,952 --> 00:19:49,496
Oh, oh, oh, and Josh,
577
00:19:49,496 --> 00:19:51,415
he bought a bulldog from a puppy mill.
578
00:19:51,415 --> 00:19:53,083
A female-owned puppy mill.
579
00:19:53,083 --> 00:19:54,460
- Bye.
- Oh, come on.
580
00:19:56,129 --> 00:19:58,297
Mmm, what flavor is this?
581
00:19:58,297 --> 00:19:59,507
Lavender chamomile.
582
00:19:59,507 --> 00:20:01,301
It's like sipping a massage.
583
00:20:01,301 --> 00:20:04,096
I put it in my travel mug,
tell everybody I'm drinking hot coffee.
584
00:20:04,096 --> 00:20:05,806
Yeah, you shouldn't have
to hide it though, you know?
585
00:20:05,806 --> 00:20:07,475
You know, why can't men enjoy
delicious things?
586
00:20:07,475 --> 00:20:09,185
Yeah, and all of our deodorants are,
587
00:20:09,185 --> 00:20:12,439
like, "sandalwood musk"
or "Arctic gunmetal."
588
00:20:12,439 --> 00:20:14,025
- Mm.
- I like vanilla.
589
00:20:14,025 --> 00:20:15,151
- I like bergamot.
- Yes.
590
00:20:15,151 --> 00:20:16,402
Why can't I smell like those?
591
00:20:16,402 --> 00:20:18,655
You know, I have never
once had a manicure.
592
00:20:18,655 --> 00:20:20,449
- No.
- Yeah, because I guess society
593
00:20:20,449 --> 00:20:22,826
has decided that personal
hygiene is gendered.
594
00:20:22,826 --> 00:20:24,286
And do you know what women get to do
595
00:20:24,286 --> 00:20:25,511
that I always wished that I could?
596
00:20:25,536 --> 00:20:27,123
- Both: Hmm?
- Give and receive
597
00:20:27,123 --> 00:20:28,624
multiple orgasms.
598
00:20:28,624 --> 00:20:31,253
No, I think technically
we can give those.
599
00:20:31,253 --> 00:20:33,464
I don't think so.
600
00:20:33,464 --> 00:20:35,591
You know what? I'm doing it.
I'm ordering the vanilla.
601
00:20:35,591 --> 00:20:37,177
- Yes.
- Because I like it.
602
00:20:37,177 --> 00:20:38,345
- Yes.
- Good for you.
603
00:20:38,345 --> 00:20:40,221
- Please do.
- Your body, your choice.
604
00:20:40,221 --> 00:20:42,474
Were we the good guys
or the bad guys just now?
605
00:20:42,474 --> 00:20:44,268
No idea, but it was fun.
606
00:20:44,268 --> 00:20:46,812
Yeah, I see why that generation
likes canceling people.
607
00:20:46,812 --> 00:20:48,439
It's energizing.
608
00:20:48,439 --> 00:20:49,816
What's going on here?
609
00:20:49,816 --> 00:20:51,777
We're havin' a Payne
Women's Committee meeting.
610
00:20:51,777 --> 00:20:53,445
This is black coffee, by the way.
611
00:20:53,445 --> 00:20:55,531
Uh-huh. Hey, uh,
612
00:20:55,531 --> 00:20:57,492
have you guys written up
those policies I asked for?
613
00:20:57,492 --> 00:20:59,660
Oh, you know, we, um... We started them,
614
00:20:59,660 --> 00:21:01,413
but then ultimately felt,
you know, that, like,
615
00:21:01,413 --> 00:21:03,582
as men, it wasn't really our place.
616
00:21:03,582 --> 00:21:05,334
Yeah, that needs
to be something women do
617
00:21:05,334 --> 00:21:06,794
- for themselves.
- Oh, great, yeah.
618
00:21:06,794 --> 00:21:08,088
One more thing on my plate.
619
00:21:08,088 --> 00:21:11,174
- Thank you, guys.
- Yeah, yeah. Good job.
620
00:21:11,174 --> 00:21:14,720
Are men genetically lazy,
or is this more like a societal thing?
621
00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:16,680
Honestly, and don't repeat this,
622
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:19,517
- I truly think it's both.
- Mm-hmm.
623
00:21:19,655 --> 00:21:23,656
- Synced and corrected by synk -
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