Original subtitles

[exhales deeply]

FRANKIE: This is the place.

I feel it.

Here you go, sweet pea.

Oh, my God! FRANKIE: You know what to do!

It is time to dig.

Enough with the fucking shovel!

I'm not... There's... I'm not digging your fucking grave!

FRANKIE: It is just a tiny hole!

It's a foot!

It's a foot and a half.

For my ashes.

No!

You cannot keep fighting this, Clare.

I am asking you to do one... simple... thing.

No! Not doing it!

I'm not gonna kill you.

I'm not gonna bury you.

Fine.

I'll do it myself.

Happy fucking birthday.

Mom!

[clock ticking]

MAN: Dear Sugar.

My 20-year marriage fell apart.

Whose fault?

Mine? My wife's? Society's?

I don't know.

But now I've met a woman with whom I click very nicely,

and I'm afraid to say that little four-letter word.

So my question is this:

when is the right time to say, "I love you"?

And what is this "love" thing all about?

[footsteps thudding]

Signed, Johnny.

[Clare sighs]

- Mom? - Oh, my God. Rae. Sorry.

Ooh, you scared me.

Why are you back down here again?

Whose sweatshirt is that?

No one's.

What... Why are you just standing there?

Um, I... I have to tell you something.

Okay.

Uncle Lucas' friend didn't... drop off the money.

Your... Your dad

dropped it off.

[bottles clattering]

CLARE'S DAD: Hand me one of those there, would you, Clare-Bear?

♪ uneasy music playing ♪

[device beeping]

[Frankie groaning]

[clock ticking]

AUTOMATED VOICE: The mailbox is full and cannot accept any messages at this time. Goodbye.

[Clare grunts]

[breathes deeply]

[phone beeps]

Why was Dad here? Question mark.

Why did he give me that money? Question mark.

What the fuck did you do, Lucas? Fucking question mark.

[sighs] Okay...

[line ringing]

Oh, come on, come on, come on.

MAN [over phone]:

Hello?

[phone clatters]

RAE: Wait... Who was it?

Mom?

Mom.

YOUNG CLARE: "Above all, there was understanding.

"She felt as if a mist had been lifted from her eyes,

"enabling her to look upon and comprehend the significance of life,

that monster made up of beauty and brutality."

WOMAN: Happy St. Patrick's Day.

[Frankie groaning] CLARE: Where's the doctor?

It's almost 6:00. No one's come in all day.

I just saw him by the elevators.

Oh, my God.

Where the fuck are they...

Where are the... Where are the car keys?

You don't drive!

Where are they?

- What is going on? - I don't know.

Who would put a colander in the fridge with one grape in it?

Seriously, one grape?

Where are the fucking keys?

DANNY: Okay, whoa! What is going on, Clare? What's wrong?

- Clare. - Here.

Okay. You'll drive.

RAE: What? I don't have a license.

You're always saying you need more hours.

Clare, what is happening? All right, should we... talk?

No, you and I shouldn't anything.

You were right about Lucas. I shouldn't have trusted him.

Okay? You good? You happy?

Let's go.

Hey, wait. Excuse me. Excuse me. Hi.

My... My... My mom... Uh, Frances Pierce in 316...

She needs more morphine.

And... And no one's helping.

Your mother's morphine is administered every 12 hours.

CLARE: Well, administer it sooner.

She needs help.

But, of course, you're not helping

because you didn't wanna treat her from the beginning.

What I said is your mother's cancer is untreatable.

CLARE: No, what you said is that she had a year.

And it's been seven weeks.

- [elevator dings] - These things are impossible to predict.

There's too many variables.

Fuck the variables. She's a very important person.

She's a... She's a very important person.

Her body is shutting down. That's part of the process.

So if there's anyone else that needs to say goodbye,

they should come.

And sooner rather than later.

What?

She's got about...

two weeks.

I'm sorry.

[line ringing]

[whispers] Come on.

Come on, please, pick up the phone.

Come on, Lucas. [line continues ringing]

[device beeping] [Frankie groaning]

[softly] Come on in, honey.

It's okay.

I'm gonna go get Lucas. He ne... He needs to be here.

[softly] Honey, no.

I know he loves me.

And if he's not here, it's because he can't be.

I'll be back in a few hours.

[Frankie groans in pain]

It hurts.

I love you.

[Frankie groans]

Love.

I'll be back soon.

Do you wanna get dinner?

We can get chicken sammies

and waffle fries. [phone chimes]

Okay. So, what... what did he say,

when he handed you the money?

What?

My dad. What did he say?

I already told you.

What did he say exactly?

Uh, he... he just came to the door and he called me Frankie and...

He... He just told me to give the envelope to you.

And that's all?

- You're certain there's nothing else? - Yes.

- There's nothing else? - No. No.

Okay, what was it? Was it yes or no?

- I need to know! What did he say? - I don't know! You're stressing me out!

- Jesus Christ! Just tell me what he said. - I'm trying to drive!

That's all I want to know! Please. What did he say?

I don't know. He was old, and he seemed kind of racist.

Um, I asked him why Uncle Lucas didn't come.

What did he say?

Uh... "Family takes care of family," I think.

Get off.

- What? - Go.

- Wha... - Get over, now!

- What? - Now!

Oh, my fucking God!

[tires squealing] [cars honking]

Lucas? Lucas!

Hi.

- Mom? - Okay.

- What are you doing? - God, where is anybody!

- Take it. - Ow!

Excuse me.

- Mom! - Excuse me!

Mom!

Excuse me. Where, uh, where are your shovels?

The sharp kind.

Mom, I'm not driving you anywhere until you tell me what we're doing.

Mom!

[frantic knocking on door]

CLARE: Open the door, Lucas.

Come on! I know you're in there!

Grow up and answer me!

Hey. Chill. He's not fucking here.

Where is he?

I don't know. Try Whit's?

Tell him he fuckin' owes me money.

When he shows up, you make him fucking call me.

Sorry about your Ma.

That blows.

CLARE: Pull over.

Oh, here.

[turns engine off]

Wait, why aren't we going to the house?

Shhh. Shh.

I thought we were here to see Uncle Lucas.

[cuts engine]

[Lady whinnies]

[Lady snorts]

LUCAS: Clare. [sniffles]

Where have you been?

Look at me!

Look at me.

Two weeks.

She's got two weeks.

I'm sorry I'm such a fuckup.

You'll sleep it off.

We'll leave first thing in the morning.

Does she look different?

Yeah. A little.

Is she mad at me?

No.

LUCAS: I can't see her like that. In the hospital.

And I can't be home either.

I... I just... I can't be here alone.

Why? 'Cause you're scared?

- No. - Yeah, you're scared.

You're scared the Scary Man is gonna come...

come and get you?

Oh, my God, the Scary Man.

- Oh, I forgot about him. - Yeah.

Fucking Dad.

I thought he was gonna kidnap us.

Yeah, but he didn't.

He didn't want us.

He never did.

Who's gonna care what happens to us after she's gone?

Wait. Wait, Mom. What are you doing?

I'm gonna dig up her ashes.

Wait, it's been 30 years. There's nothing there.

She can't be here with him.

With who?

[indistinct conversation]

Well, I'll read one that you're not reading.

CLARE: Wait, what's in front of her door?

No. No!

No, no, Mom!

[Clare wailing] No!

[sobbing] No!

[twigs snap]

Mom?

Mom!

[Clare wailing]

Don't fucking touch me!

Don't fucking touch me.

[Clare crying]

I will never forgive you for this!

This will never be okay.

What the fuck did you do, Lucas?

How you doing there, Clare-Bear? Been a long time.

- Go to the car, Rae. - What? No.

- Nice to see you again. - Do not talk to her!

LUCAS: It's not what you think.

He's different.

Oh, he... he is? It's bullshit.

He's changed. Clare, he's sober.

CLARE: Oh, did he tell you that?

And you believed him?

You are such a fuckin' idiot.

Why don't we just go up to the house? And then we can talk.

CLARE: Why are you here? This is not your home.

You are not welcome here!

- It is. - What?

- It is his. - What? I can't hear you, Lucas.

I bought the house. It's ours. I bought it from Luke.

Anytime you wanna come up, bring your family...

You sold Mom's home to her abuser?

- He's... He's our dad. - Abuser? Is that what you think?

Yes! I know it! Because I was there!

You were a child, you don't remember...

Oh, you pulled Mom off of her bed by her hair.

You broke her pinkie.

You smashed her dishes because you didn't like her spaghetti!

Listen, he saved Mom's house.

It was gonna be foreclosed on.

I gave you that money out of her college tuition.

LUCAS: It wasn't enough!

You act like you did me some kind of favor,

you know, giving me this place.

He doesn't love you, Lucas. You know that, right?

- CLARE'S DAD: That's enough. - This man does not love you!

You don't even know that. CLARE: Yes. Oh, I do!

You think that this man could love anything? - Just, just stop.

CLARE: You think he is capable of loving anything? - That's enough.

- He doesn't know how to love. - Just stop.

Mom told us to forgive.

- That people can change... - Oh, you think she was talking about him?

- Before she died, she said... - Don't talk to me about before she died.

- You weren't fucking there! - Stop holding that over me!

It's not like you were some saint.

And neither was Mom.

What are you talking about, Lucas?

You hold her up on... on some kind of pedestal...

CLARE: Why would you ever say that about her? - ...like she was this perfect person.

- You can stop right now! - There's more than your side of the story!

Stop fucking talking!

Both of you stop talking. Okay, it's over. It's done.

We're not gonna settle this tonight. Let's just... Just let it lay.

CLARE: Wow. I should've known.

Should've never given you anything. Ever.

- Fuck you. - Yeah. Fuck you!

- My marriage is over because of you! - What?

I wasn't with Mom when she died because of you!

No! You weren't there because of you.

It was your fucking choice.

Nobody asked you to come get me.

Nobody. Not me. Not Mom. That was fucking on you.

Rae, go to the car.

Mom. no.

CLARE: Just go to the car, Rae!

This isn't over.

This is not over.

Ain't it crazy how 50 years just flies by?

I still remember the day that you were born, Clare.

And you haven't changed a bit.

This isn't your house.

And if you hurt him, I'll fuckin' kill you.

Let's go.

[Rae sniffling]

Honey...

Oh, sweetheart, pull over. You need to pull over.

[Rae sobbing]

Oh. I'm so sorry.

You should not have heard any... any word of that.

This is all my fault!

What are you saying?

I told Uncle Lucas about the money.

Ab... Ab... About the college fund. I told him.

I'm sorry. I didn't...

Uh, we were just texting and... and it just came out,

and I didn't think it was a big deal.

But then he asked you for it.

And then... And then Dad got so mad, and you just left...

- No, Rae. No, Rae. That's not... - You guys kept fighting and I didn't...

Shhh. Shhh. Shh. It's okay.

Are you and Dad...

getting a divorce?

No.

I mean...

There... We have stuff to... figure out.

But look... But, hey, that is not your stuff.

None of this is your fault. Okay?

Your dad and I love you so much.

Anything that you think you did,

you... you... you did out of love.

Right?

Okay?

CLARE: Dear Johnny.

The last word my mother ever said to me was "love."

She was so sick and weak and out of her head

that she couldn't muster the "I" or the "you."

That didn't matter.

That puny word has the power to stand on its own.

I wasn't with my mom when she died.

No one was.

And even now, that fact haunts me.

I would never be with my mom when she died.

I suppose you think this has nothing to do with your question, Johnny,

but it has everything to do with my answer.

It has everything to do with every answer I have ever given as Sugar.

Love. Love. Love.

It clanks inside me like an iron bell.

Love is Sugar's genesis story.

It can be romantic,

platonic,

familial,

or fleeting.

Sullied by abuse,

imbued with sorrow,

or twisted by betrayal.

Wait, wait, wait.

Why am I doing this?

- [gate squeaking] - [softly] Hey.

Just keep 'em covered. Keep 'em covered.

[horses snorting]

[horses whinnying]

Okay, open 'em.

[horse neighing]

[horses neighing, snorting]

Oh, my God.

Go on.

Pet 'em.

The best thing you can possibly do with your life

is tackle the motherfucking shit out of love.

MEL: Hey.

DANNY: Hey.

Uh, thank you for coming, you know?

I mean, I... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have...

No, no, no. Stop. Stop.

What you did was a huge step.

Yeah. Yeah.

Well, the... the thing you sent me, the Sugar thing, it helped.

Come on in.

I think it was good you were there.

With Uncle Lucas.

Instead of your mom.

Maybe we end up where we're supposed to be.

I fuckin' love you.

I fucking love you too.

CLARE: So, sweet pea, here's what I say.

Be brave.

Be authentic.

Forgive yourself.

And practice saying the word "love" to the people you love.

So when it matters the most, you will say it.

[horse neighing]

[wind whooshing] [device beeping]

[Frankie groans softly]

[breathes deeply]

[softly] Love.

Love.

It's time.

CLARE: We're all gonna die, Johnny.

So hit the iron bell like it's dinnertime.

Yours,

Sugar.

[bell clanging]

♪ Where are you? ♪

♪ Are you there? ♪

♪ Can you hear me still? ♪

♪ In the night ♪

♪ In the house ♪

♪ I can feel you still ♪

♪ And you're not gone ♪

♪ All I have to do is picture me and you ♪

♪ And you're not gone ♪

♪ I feel you right with me I see you riding free ♪

♪ Yeah, I'm not going ♪

♪ I'm not gonna run I've only just begun ♪

♪ I'm not going ♪

♪ I feel you in my bones ♪

♪ I'll make my heart a home ♪

♪ Yeah, there we are ♪

♪ I'm not too far away ♪

♪ Yeah, there you are ♪

♪ You're not too far away ♪