Original subtitles

[dog barking]

[footsteps thudding] [people grunting, panting]

GIRL: Careful.

BOY: You're drunk.

[indistinct talking]

BOY: Okay, here's good.

[thuds]

[girl giggling]

Let's get out of here. GIRL: Okay. Go, go. Come on.

[both giggling]

[retches and vomits]

[Rae groaning]

Is that the Little Dipper?

That's the Big Dipper, doofus.

Actually, you're both wrong.

LITTLE CLARE: Can we go back now?

FRANKIE: Nope.

Be patient, sweet peas.

YOUNG CLARE: I'm tired. It's too hot.

You said you wanted air.

Conditioning. I want air-conditioning.

Well, we would need electricity for that.

And a bathroom inside.

Everyone I know gets to poop inside.

And you will have all those things someday.

But this... This is better than any of those things.

I promise.

[gate squeaking]

[whispering] Okay. It's time.

Close your eyes.

And be really quiet.

And I'll say when you can open them.

- [horse nickers] - What's that noise?

[horses nickering]

[whispering] Okay. Now.

[horse whinnying] [Little Clare gasps]

♪

♪

LITTLE LUCAS: Do they belong to us, Mommy?

I wish they did.

Hi, Lady.

You sweet, sweet girl.

What the fuck?

[phone chimes]

"Due to your pending investigation,

you are required to complete an online ethics and boundaries course."

Oh, fuck you, boundaries.

[phone chimes]

Mm.

[door opens]

DANNY: Clare! Clare, come here!

Why is she on a surfboard?

I don't know. I just came outside and she was...

CLARE: Rae, are you okay? Are you hurt?

What... Uh... What... Uh, who left you here?

No one. I'm f... I'm fine.

Frankie Rae, are you drunk?

Have you guys ever had a White Russian?

Since when do you drink, Rae? CLARE: Oh, my God.

Rae, I need you to get up right now and come inside the house.

[Rae mumbles]

Frankie Rae, I want you to look at me and talk to me right now.

Who left you here like this?

Was it those awful threesome people? Is that who did this?

Are they the same ones

- who made you eat that cucumber? - What?

CLARE: I saw that.

Did they make you eat that cucumber?

Who made you eat that cucumber?

MAN: [on video] I love what you did with the Peterson case.

You know, a massage can make a stressful day seem better.

WOMAN: [on video] That sounds great, but I actually have to get home.

So we see here that Bob is not only being suggestive to Rhonda,

he's violating her personal space.

And that's the thing about personal space.

It's personal.

[quick knocks on door]

All right, come on. Let's wake up.

Now!

We're gonna be...

Now! Let's get up. Let's go!

RAE: I hate those stars.

What? You named your first hamster Cassiopeia.

Yeah, well, I'm taking them down.

Your dad is playing today.

You need to be there early.

And having a hangover does not qualify as a reason to skip church.

RAE: Why do you even care? You don't even believe in God.

It's Easter, and it is time to resurrect.

[Rae groans] Let's go.

[Rae sighs]

You skip every Sunday.

Su... Sundays are my time to write.

RAE: Yeah, except you never do.

Do you realize that you could've been assaulted last night?

Or worse.

And your so-called friends just left you on our lawn

to choke on your own barf.

So who was that? Was that Montana?

It wasn't Montana.

Wh... Wh... Why can't you make some just nice new friends?

- Like, what happened to Bethany from dance? - Can you just stop?

Do you know if something happened to you,

I would not be able to survive?

Do you realize that? I would die!

My life would be over!

I would not be able to go on.

Then I guess you shouldn't have had me!

[door closes]

Why are you mad at me?

Frankie?

Frankie?

Stop calling me that!

When is this bullshit gonna end?

The White Russians, and the surfboards,

and the giving a shit about a person that is so clearly beneath you?

And rejecting your own grandmother's name?

She was never my grandmother!

[door slams shut]

[exhales]

[groans]

Well, can you talk to her? Because she fucking hates me.

Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna do a lot more than talk to her.

I'm gonna ground her ass.

Really? An Easter basket?

Well, it's tradition.

Tradition as well?

Oh, my God.

Was that pickle flavored?

Happy Easter.

Let's go.

So I'll just meet you at brunch then?

Oh, so you're coming to brunch?

Unless it's going to feel weird.

I mean, why wouldn't I...

No, no. I mean, it won't be weird if we don't make it weird.

I just don't want anyone to think anything is wrong.

Okay, um...

If you don't want to go, then don't go.

I'll just make an excuse then, you know?

Uh, you can stay here. I'll tell them that you're...

that you're writing.

That wouldn't be an excuse. I do write.

I'll take this just in case she changes her mind.

Danny, I haven't even said that I'm not gonna...

I... I'm coming. I can bring the basket.

Look, I, uh, I think you're right.

You know, we don't want 'em to know that things aren't normal.

Happy writing.

[door closes]

♪

[telephone ringing]

Hello? FRANKIE: [over phone] Hi, honey.

Hi. Hey, Mom. Um, sorry, can I call you back?

I'm working on that essay competition for Pleiades.

I need you to come home.

Why? What's wrong?

Today.

CLARE: [over phone] Today? No, I can't, Mom.

I have work, then class tonight.

You need to come home right now.

Okay.

Okay. Yeah.

Sure.

WOMAN: Dear Sugar,

I'm writing this from my little bed in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit.

My husband and I just found out

that our six-month-old daughter has a brain tumor

and she's having brain surgery tomorrow.

People have poured all their thoughts and prayers

into us right now.

I want to believe the prayers are working,

but... I don't know.

I've never been super religious

but... now I find myself doubting God's existence

more than ever.

I'm so scared that I'll lose my sweet baby girl.

If there was a God,

why would He let this happen to us?

[phone vibrating]

AMY: Well, at least she made it home.

How many shit bunkers did we happen to wake up in?

Remember Burger? CLARE: Oh, God.

With the van?

And the trash bag that was full of mushrooms?

What? What? [Clare laughing]

Do you remember that he would just play Free Bird on repeat?

And also, P.S. vans.

Vans. CLARE: Terrifying!

Vans. Ugh.

It's kind of a miracle that we're alive, really.

- When you think about it. - Yep.

Hi. Can you just keep these coming?

WAITER: Sure. AMY: Thank you.

Wow. Come on, Frankie, well, she's a good girl.

Rae! AMY: Whatever she would like to be called.

She's... She's way smarter than we ever were.

Okay?

Oh, she has to be careful. She does.

I got something.

You'll think I'm brilliant. Here, take these.

Is that a... What is that?

Those are fentanyl strips.

And they're like the free condoms now.

I keep 'em at the bar. Uh, just give 'em to her.

She can test everything that she's taking.

I know. You wouldn't really think it,

but that shit is just everywhere.

Are you kidding me? AMY: No.

Now I have to worry about fentanyl on top of everything else?

AMY: Yeah, you do.

WOMAN: Good Bloody Mary? [baby crying]

Thanks for the help, Sugar.

AMY: [from distance]

Are you okay?

Yo!

Oh, God. Spin-city.

I mean, it's basically like...

Um...

Are you okay?

CLARE: I... I...

I'm sorry. I have to go. AMY: You gotta go?

- We haven't gotten... - I know.

...to the bottom of our bottomless, please.

Listen, I'm gonna Venmo you for all of this. It's on me.

AMY: What are you doing?

Love you.

- If it's the fentanyl strips, I'm sorry. - No, it's not the fentanyl strips.

- I love you. - I'm sorry... No, 'cause you're spinning.

I'm not spinning. I love you. AMY: You are.

YOUNG CLARE: Hi, Mom.

Thanks for coming, sweet pea.

Yeah, what's going on?

Why are you all dressed up?

I made spinach lasagna.

For lunch?

What is happening?

FRANKIE: And there's an apple crisp

and ice cream for dessert.

Was this just some ploy to get me to come home?

Don't ask me.

No, it wasn't a ploy.

Okay, well, I had to call in sick.

And I still didn't finish that essay that's due Monday.

I can't just come home just because you miss me.

No one misses you.

Yeah? That's why you keep begging me to come visit?

[sighs] Sit down, everything's ready.

CLARE: No, I'm not gonna sit down until you tell me what was so important

that I drop everything and come home.

Well, it turns out that...

this cold that I seem to have had for months

is, um...

It isn't a cold.

Okay. Well, what is it?

♪ somber music playing ♪

Mom?

Honey, what are you doing?

We're gonna need everything we have.

Lucas, help me.

- I don't think... - Lucas, just help me!

FRANKIE: Well, will you at least have something to eat?

You still need to eat.

Piles of four.

We're gonna see every doctor we can.

There's a cancer center in San Francisco,

and we're going to get a second opinion

and a third and fourth opinion.

And I'm gonna call Jess.

Jess' parents can help.

I'm gonna call him tonight so that... so that he can call them.

FRANKIE: Honey, there are no more opinions to get.

[softly] That's $5...

The whole team of doctors looked at the scan.

- I have stage IV terminal lung cancer. - Please stop.

FRANKIE: It's not treatable.

We aren't going to treat it.

Stop saying that!

Jesus, Clare. You think that's helping?

I was thinking...

if you want to reach out to your dad...

Why are you bringing him up?

FRANKIE: Because he's your father.

And people can change.

And it's okay to love him even when I'm gone.

CLARE: Well, you're not gonna be gone.

You two may have given up, but I haven't.

[exhales] Okay.

MAN: Wait, I don't get it.

- WOMAN 1: - That's what the kids are into, James.

You're watching someone on the Internet eating?

Oh, but have you seen the girl that does her hair

and tells you about women who just snap and kill people?

Oh, that's quality right there.

Rae, grab your basket and come out here and help your cousin find eggs.

Some of those eggs, they got 20s in 'em.

You know what I used to do for $20?

No one knows.

[all chuckling]

♪

Mommy!

What're you doing here?

CLARE: Uh...

I've... I've brought pastries.

Clare, can I get you something to eat?

- Oh. - I'm gonna fix you something to eat.

Danny said you weren't coming or I would've left lunch out.

Oh, I never said I wasn't...

Hey, Clare. No chicken salad today?

Uh, I didn't have time to make chicken...

I just can't with those raisins.

They're currants. I put currants in the chicken.

Ignore her.

Wouldn't be Easter without you, all right?

And hey, don't worry about Rae.

Danny ever come home on a surfboard?

- I was talking about college. - Hmm.

If you all need help, we got you.

WOMAN 2: Let me tell you, if I gave away my kid's college fund,

I'd be somewhere way worse than in the basement, okay?

WOMAN 1: Here, Clare. Have something to eat.

You want some ham?

Okay.

[softly] Are you fucking kidding me?

[softly] It... It... It came up.

What the fuck do you mean, "It came up"?

- Clare... - 'Cause clearly you told them!

Clare, you gave your brother $15,000 of our money.

It's a big fucking deal! I told my dad. So what?

You know how much of our money we give to your family every fucking year?

This whole city is crawling with your relatives. - Okay?

There's graduation. There's weddings. There's baby showers. There's holidays.

All I'm doing is making chicken salad that just goes wasted!

Yeah, because no one likes raisins!

They're currants!

And they're fucking expensive, so just add that to the tab!

- Tab? So... So we're keeping tally on... - No, I'm just making a point!

- You give me so much shit about Lucas... - Yeah.

...when all I do is shit for your family!

Our family, Clare.

Okay, the same family that love us and care for us and took you in.

And... And...

You know what? At the end of the day,

it's not even just about the money.

You gave that away without even talking to me about it.

- I'm your husband. - So just take my side.

Just be on my side.

And stop giving your aunt a fucking excuse

to make that fucking face at me every time she fucking sees me!

[yelling] Enough!

Oh. A... A different aunt.

Oh, my God, what is wrong with you?

You can't keep trapping people in tiny spaces just to yell at them!

CLARE: None of this is okay.

Sneaking out.

Getting drunk.

Being so mean to me!

Why are you so mean to me? Huh?

- No... - Just stop!

Do you know what's going on out there?

It is a war zone!

There are condoms laced with fentanyl.

You don't even know what you're talking about.

That's not a thing.

All I'm saying is that you need to be careful.

You need to be smart.

You need to find friends who have your back.

I have friends.

What... What about Bethany?

- Bethany? Bethany? - Yes. She was so sweet.

You know Bethany had anal sex on a Greyhound going to Reno?

- What? - Yeah.

Why would she want to take a bus to Reno?

I don't know, maybe she was hoping it would crash just to annoy her mother.

Okay.

I'ma pray for that Bethany.

Thank you.

Our father

who art in heaven, hallowed be thy...

Hallowed be thy...

Fuck Fathers!

Fuck you! Fuck you!

MAN: Didn't you ever hear you catch more flies

with honey than vinegar?

That's what your mama always says to me.

She's gonna die.

It's lung cancer.

She just found out.

Uh... I'm s...

I'm so sorry.

That, uh...

Oh, hon.

[Clare crying]

Anything I can do, Liv and me, we're just up the road.

Lady.

Sell me Lady.

Oh, darlin', she's...

I've... I've got, um... I've got $386 right now.

And after that, I can...

I can give you monthly payments.

And however much you need, I'll pay it. I just, uh...

A horse would save her life.

And I... I just... I really... I need to save her life.

Clare.

Go home.

Be with your mom.

I'll be praying for y'all.

[scoffs]

Oh, my God.

[distant crying]

[indistinct chatter]

[crying continues]

[crying continues]

[woman crying] [baby wailing]

- [baby continues wailing] - Shhh.

I'm sorry.

I didn't know what to write.

I didn't have the words.

WOMAN 1: Clare?

I'm glad you're here. I was afraid you went home.

- I... - This isn't about the currants, is it?

Oh, psh.

I... I'm just failing at everything right now.

I just feel like...

Sorry.

Danny and I are... are fighting.

I know you know that.

And, uh, Frankie can't stand me.

Rae.

[exhales] I have such a hard time calling her that.

I just feel like there's a wall between us.

[crying] And I'm so afraid that something bad is gonna happen.

You're not gonna lose her.

There was a reason...

that I... that I named her after my mom.

Must be hard sometimes coming here.

Oh, no! I'm just so grateful to you.

For all of you. So grateful.

It can be both.

All that...

strength and courage and love you had to find inside yourself

after your mom died,

you poured right into Rae.

You became the amazing mom you are

because you were forced to learn to mother yourself.

I am not amazing.

Here. I'm gonna do something.

Oh, no, no. I'm... I don't... This is not my...

Dear Heavenly Father.

[Clare sighs]

We come before you humbly,

requesting that you look out for our dear, sweet baby girl,

Frankie Rae.

And that we all accept who she is telling us she wants to be.

We ask that you wrap your loving arms around...

our precious Rae

and Clare.

Protect them from harm, Lord.

And we pray...

that Clare feels us, her family...

holding her in your divine love...

just like you held her before.

[Frankie sobbing]

YOUNG CLARE: Mom.

CLARE: Dear Terrified,

I can't tell you how sorry I am

for what you and your family are going through.

I'm sorry.

CLARE: When I learned my mom was gonna die of cancer,

she was only 45.

And I was terrified too.

I was also angry.

If God wasn't gonna save my mom,

then I thought God was either a ruthless bitch

or more likely, just didn't exist.

But if He does,

I know He's not some spirit man who may or may not hear our prayers

and swoop in to save us when the going gets rough.

- I mean, she could have texted. - Yeah.

So what if we thought about God differently?

- FRANKIE: Just call me, okay? - Okay.

CLARE: And realize that God isn't in the answers to our prayers,

but in the people praying for us.

[horse whinnying]

What if, together, those people form a raft?

Oh, my God.

CLARE: That will hold your weight and keep you afloat

by the human love given to you when you needed it the most.

She's yours as long as you'd like to keep her.

♪

CLARE: If I believed in God,

I'd see evidence of his existence in that.

♪

So, Terrified,

what if you didn't worry about everyone's God...

[Rae heaving]

Okay, I got it. I got it.

[Danny sighs]

...and allowed your God to exist

in the simple words of compassion others offer you?

She was the reason I got up in the morning.

Montana.

CLARE: What if faith is the way it feels

to lay your hand on your daughter's sacred body,

under the same big sky where your mother held you?

What if in your darkest hour,

amidst your greatest fears and your deepest losses,

you saw the miracle in that?

[horse neighs]

Yours,

Sugar.

♪ I may not always love you ♪

♪ But as long as there are stars above you ♪

♪ You'll never need to doubt it ♪

♪ I'll make you so sure about it ♪

♪ God only knows what I'd be without you ♪

♪

♪ Oh, God only knows ♪

♪ What I'd be without you ♪

♪ God only knows ♪

♪ What I'd be ♪

♪ Without you ♪