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1
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[ thunder crashing ]
[ drilling, sawing ]
2
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:26,025
[ electricity crackling ]
>> it's alive!
3
00:00:26,092 --> 00:00:37,604
[ electricity crackling ]
>> it's alive!
4
00:00:37,670 --> 00:00:39,973
>> you realize, when I pulled
You over, you were doing
5
00:00:40,039 --> 00:00:41,174
87 miles an hour?
6
00:00:41,241 --> 00:00:42,342
>> yeah, I know.
7
00:00:42,409 --> 00:00:43,676
Believe me, I know.
8
00:00:43,743 --> 00:00:45,812
>> there it is! The holy grail!
9
00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:48,548
>> wow!
10
00:00:48,615 --> 00:00:49,682
Now what?
11
00:00:49,749 --> 00:00:51,951
>> well, I guess one of us
Should stay here and guard the
12
00:00:52,018 --> 00:00:53,153
Cup.
13
00:00:53,219 --> 00:00:55,255
>> all right, why don't we draw
Straws and see who picks the
14
00:00:55,321 --> 00:00:57,223
One --
Oh, come on, guys!
15
00:00:57,290 --> 00:00:58,291
Oh, real mature!
16
00:00:58,358 --> 00:01:00,794
Can't we just leave a note or
Something?
17
00:01:00,860 --> 00:01:01,995
What if I get hungry?!
18
00:01:02,061 --> 00:01:03,129
>> order in!
19
00:01:03,196 --> 00:01:04,297
>> oh!
20
00:01:04,364 --> 00:01:08,868
...109, 110, 111, 112, 113, 114,
115, 116, 117, 118 -- aah!
21
00:01:08,935 --> 00:01:14,174
...And a large sprite if --
Slice? Ugh. Okay, a large slice.
22
00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:16,042
It's the third cave on the left.
23
00:01:16,109 --> 00:01:18,411
You're gonna do a penitent
Somersault.
24
00:01:18,478 --> 00:01:21,948
Then the door code is "Jehovah,"
But it's latin, so it starts
25
00:01:22,015 --> 00:01:22,816
With an "I."
26
00:01:22,882 --> 00:01:24,384
Are you even writing this down?
27
00:01:24,451 --> 00:01:27,387
[ slurps ]
Mmm! Ohh.
28
00:01:27,454 --> 00:01:30,789
[ grunting ]
Ha ha! I thwart you! Ha ha!
29
00:01:30,857 --> 00:01:32,058
Unh! Oh ho ho!
30
00:01:32,125 --> 00:01:34,461
Didn't see that one coming, did
You?
31
00:01:34,527 --> 00:01:37,664
[ grunting ]
Think I'll grow a beard.
32
00:01:37,729 --> 00:01:40,500
Am I just eating 'cause I'm
Bored?
33
00:01:40,567 --> 00:01:41,601
Ooh!
34
00:01:41,668 --> 00:01:46,271
[ moaning ]
Eee-hee-hee!
35
00:01:46,339 --> 00:01:48,208
Ohh, satan!
36
00:01:48,274 --> 00:01:52,011
Long live the quee--
[ yawns ] Sleepy.
37
00:01:52,078 --> 00:01:53,279
Hmm.
38
00:01:53,346 --> 00:01:57,383
I got to get some new menus.
39
00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:59,719
Are you the pizza guy?
40
00:01:59,786 --> 00:02:01,821
>> there's no time to explain.
41
00:02:01,888 --> 00:02:04,390
>> which one is the holy grail?
42
00:02:04,457 --> 00:02:08,695
This is the cup of the king of
Kings!
43
00:02:08,761 --> 00:02:14,467
[ gulping ]
Aaaaaah!
44
00:02:14,534 --> 00:02:18,204
[ explosion ]
>> ooh, I had the same reaction
45
00:02:18,271 --> 00:02:21,207
When I had king of kings.
46
00:02:21,274 --> 00:02:23,743
I think it's the secret sauce.
47
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:33,186
[ fabric flapping ]
>> hit the bell, win a prize!
48
00:02:33,253 --> 00:02:37,156
[ crunch! ]
[ squeak ]
49
00:02:37,223 --> 00:02:41,027
[ whoosh! Plunk! ]
>> ha ha ha!
50
00:02:41,094 --> 00:02:43,228
[ inhales sharply ] Yeah!
51
00:02:43,296 --> 00:02:45,531
>> [ groans ]
>> oh, I guess I --
52
00:02:45,598 --> 00:02:48,034
I still got to kill it.
53
00:02:48,101 --> 00:02:51,304
[ crunch! ]
>> you shouldn't do this.
54
00:02:51,371 --> 00:02:54,073
>> every night, our son wakes us
Up because he thinks there's a
55
00:02:54,140 --> 00:02:56,942
Boogeyman in his closet, then he
Needs me to get him a damn glass
56
00:02:57,010 --> 00:02:57,510
Of water!
57
00:02:57,577 --> 00:02:58,043
>> honey!
58
00:02:58,111 --> 00:02:58,878
>> no!
59
00:02:58,945 --> 00:03:00,713
I'll prove to him there's no
Boogeyman.
60
00:03:00,780 --> 00:03:02,482
>> ohh, geez.
61
00:03:02,549 --> 00:03:05,451
>> [ chuckles ]
>> good night, mom and dad!
62
00:03:05,518 --> 00:03:08,054
♪ ba ba-ba-ba ♪
♪ hey there, bear, who's the
63
00:03:08,121 --> 00:03:10,857
Master of your universe? ♪
♪ it's gonna be me ♪
64
00:03:10,924 --> 00:03:13,026
♪ ba-ba-ba-ba ba-ba ♪
[ zipper opening ]
65
00:03:13,092 --> 00:03:14,994
♪ it's gonna be an awesome
Night ♪
66
00:03:15,061 --> 00:03:16,796
[ smack, squeak ]
Yeah! You like that, bitch?
67
00:03:16,863 --> 00:03:18,197
>> wha--
[ smacking, squeaking ]
68
00:03:18,264 --> 00:03:18,998
>> you are nothin'!
69
00:03:19,065 --> 00:03:20,433
You are slime!
70
00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:22,201
You like it rough, huh?
71
00:03:22,268 --> 00:03:23,937
You're a bad, bad man...
72
00:03:24,003 --> 00:03:26,706
A bad, naked man who's getting
Punished.
73
00:03:26,773 --> 00:03:28,274
Yeah! Take it!
74
00:03:28,341 --> 00:03:31,844
Yeah! Take it! You're bad!
75
00:03:31,911 --> 00:03:33,613
You're bad!
76
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:34,881
Who's your daddy?
77
00:03:34,948 --> 00:03:36,382
Who's your daddy?
78
00:03:36,449 --> 00:03:37,650
You're adopted!
79
00:03:37,716 --> 00:03:41,154
[ grunting ]
[ hissing ]
80
00:03:41,220 --> 00:03:44,057
Excelsior!
81
00:03:44,123 --> 00:03:49,062
[ sighs ]
Oh, man. I am parched.
82
00:03:49,128 --> 00:03:51,097
Mom! Dad!
83
00:03:51,164 --> 00:03:53,766
Boogeyman in the closet!
84
00:03:53,833 --> 00:03:55,969
>> what? A boogeyman?
85
00:03:56,035 --> 00:03:58,504
Honey, there's no such thing.
86
00:03:58,571 --> 00:03:59,706
>> oh, no, don't. Shh! Shh!
87
00:03:59,772 --> 00:04:02,208
>> uh, nobody...Here.
88
00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:06,379
[ chuckles nervously ]
>> mmm, mmm. Ahh!
89
00:04:06,446 --> 00:04:12,118
>> so...Good night...Dear.
90
00:04:12,185 --> 00:04:18,391
>> [ sobbing ]
>> b-b-boogeyman?
91
00:04:18,457 --> 00:04:22,395
[ whoosh! Plunk! ]
>> [ groaning ]
92
00:04:22,462 --> 00:04:29,102
[ fuse hissing ]
[ muttering ]
93
00:04:29,168 --> 00:04:34,340
[ scratching ]
>> wow.
94
00:04:34,407 --> 00:04:37,377
I-I got to make that fuse
Shorter.
95
00:04:37,443 --> 00:04:41,381
>> we took a cursed monster and
Put him in a pimped-out castle
96
00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:43,816
With 20 beauties.
97
00:04:43,883 --> 00:04:47,353
Unless he can find true love
Before the last rose petal
98
00:04:47,420 --> 00:04:49,455
Drops, the beast will die.
99
00:04:49,522 --> 00:04:52,291
This is "Beast and the
Beauties."
100
00:04:52,358 --> 00:04:54,894
>> beauties, welcome to my
Castle.
101
00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:58,364
I just want you all to know I've
Had my rabies shot, so let's
102
00:04:58,431 --> 00:04:59,565
Have a good time.
103
00:04:59,632 --> 00:05:00,633
Ha!
104
00:05:00,700 --> 00:05:03,136
>> oh...My...God!
105
00:05:03,202 --> 00:05:04,904
I bet he's a real beast in bed!
106
00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:06,572
You know I like my men hairy.
107
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:07,440
Mm-hmm.
108
00:05:07,507 --> 00:05:10,476
I used to be a groupie for
Zz top, yeah.
109
00:05:10,543 --> 00:05:12,612
>> I think I could fall in love
With beast.
110
00:05:12,679 --> 00:05:14,480
He reminds me of my cat,
Twinkles.
111
00:05:14,547 --> 00:05:16,015
He had a very rough tongue.
112
00:05:16,082 --> 00:05:18,918
I actually lost some sensitivity
Down there.
113
00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:19,752
He died.
114
00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:21,554
>> look, I don't care about the
Beast.
115
00:05:21,621 --> 00:05:22,889
I don't care about anyone.
116
00:05:22,955 --> 00:05:25,758
I came on this show to show
America I can sing.
117
00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:26,659
Check it.
118
00:05:26,726 --> 00:05:30,229
♪ ohh, baby, I want to touch
Your body ♪
119
00:05:30,296 --> 00:05:32,165
I wrote that, hmm?
120
00:05:32,231 --> 00:05:35,568
>> when I first saw the
Beauties, I was like, "Wow!"
121
00:05:35,635 --> 00:05:41,474
'cause, you know, the last thing
I [bleep] Was a horse.
122
00:05:41,541 --> 00:05:44,477
So, fantasia, tell me about
Yourself.
123
00:05:44,544 --> 00:05:45,745
>> well, I love cats.
124
00:05:45,812 --> 00:05:46,646
>> ooh, yeah.
125
00:05:46,713 --> 00:05:48,281
>> ooh, your coat's so soft.
126
00:05:48,347 --> 00:05:49,449
>> that feels good.
127
00:05:49,515 --> 00:05:50,983
>> do you like that? Yeah.
128
00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:53,853
Scratchy, scratchy, scratchy,
Scratchy, scratchy!
129
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:56,422
I can really see us having a
Connection.
130
00:05:56,489 --> 00:05:57,690
[ gasps ] What's that?
131
00:05:57,757 --> 00:05:59,025
>> that's an angry mob.
132
00:05:59,092 --> 00:06:00,126
We -- we should go.
133
00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:00,793
>> oh, no!
134
00:06:00,860 --> 00:06:01,961
>> kill the beast!
135
00:06:02,028 --> 00:06:03,262
Kill the beast! Yeah!
136
00:06:03,329 --> 00:06:05,298
Hey -- am I on tv?
137
00:06:05,364 --> 00:06:07,734
>> so, glycerine, tell me your
Story.
138
00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:08,634
>> my story?
139
00:06:08,701 --> 00:06:11,204
Yo, I'm like mariah carey in
"Glitter."
140
00:06:11,270 --> 00:06:12,238
Little girl poor.
141
00:06:12,305 --> 00:06:13,740
Little girl move to hollywood.
142
00:06:13,806 --> 00:06:16,175
Little girl rich as hell!
143
00:06:16,242 --> 00:06:19,545
♪ all those girls at my old
School ♪
144
00:06:19,612 --> 00:06:22,181
♪ can kiss my ass ♪
♪ left side, right side,
145
00:06:22,248 --> 00:06:26,152
Inside, kiss my ass ♪
>> hey, beastie boy, I go both
146
00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:29,422
Ways, so why don't you take her
And me up to your room and
147
00:06:29,489 --> 00:06:32,225
We'll make you the beast with
Three backs!
148
00:06:32,291 --> 00:06:34,427
Ha ha! Oh, my god! I'm so drunk.
149
00:06:34,494 --> 00:06:38,898
[ snarling, smacking ]
>> I decided to take some alone
150
00:06:38,965 --> 00:06:42,034
Time with fantasia 'cause she
Was wasted, so I thought,
151
00:06:42,101 --> 00:06:44,904
"Here's my chance to get in that
Tang," you know?
152
00:06:44,971 --> 00:06:48,508
We went out into the woods, away
From the cameras, but I guess
153
00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:53,713
Our microphones were still on.
154
00:06:53,780 --> 00:06:55,882
[ zipper opens ]
[ crowd shouting ]
155
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:05,858
Three beauties, only two rose
Petals left.
156
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:07,160
Glycerine...
157
00:07:07,226 --> 00:07:10,696
I'm sorry, but you are banished
From my castle.
158
00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:12,365
>> [ scoffs ] So?! So?!
159
00:07:12,431 --> 00:07:15,067
I'm glad I'm off that stupid
Show.
160
00:07:15,134 --> 00:07:17,303
Beast is ugly. I hope he dies.
161
00:07:17,370 --> 00:07:19,071
I'm-a be famous.
162
00:07:19,138 --> 00:07:22,842
♪ ooh, glycerinejohnson
Dot blogspot dot com ♪
163
00:07:22,909 --> 00:07:25,011
♪ glycerinejohnson dot
Blogspot dot c-- ♪
164
00:07:25,077 --> 00:07:27,580
What the -- get aw-- ow!
165
00:07:27,647 --> 00:07:29,348
Don't y'all know who I am?!
166
00:07:29,415 --> 00:07:32,418
♪ glycerinejohnson dot blogspot
Dot -- ow! ♪
167
00:07:32,485 --> 00:07:34,387
>> only one rose petal remains.
168
00:07:34,453 --> 00:07:36,389
It can only belong to one of
You.
169
00:07:36,455 --> 00:07:38,424
Next week --
>> the hell with next week!
170
00:07:38,491 --> 00:07:39,826
Give me that rose now, bitch!
171
00:07:39,892 --> 00:07:40,726
>> no! It's mine!
172
00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:44,597
>> be careful with the ro--
[ gasps ]
173
00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:47,900
The last rose petal has fallen!
174
00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:50,636
And so...I die.
175
00:07:50,703 --> 00:07:52,338
>> twinkles! No!
176
00:07:52,405 --> 00:07:55,474
Not again.
177
00:07:55,541 --> 00:07:58,611
[ drip! ]
[ twinkle! ]
178
00:07:58,678 --> 00:08:00,980
>> atlantis, you saved me!
179
00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:02,615
You are the one!
180
00:08:02,682 --> 00:08:04,584
>> [ giggles ] I won.
181
00:08:04,650 --> 00:08:08,120
[ smooching ]
>> say what?
182
00:08:08,187 --> 00:08:09,422
Damn! He's a prince?
183
00:08:09,488 --> 00:08:11,424
[bleep]
If I would have known that, I
184
00:08:11,490 --> 00:08:14,327
Would have just sucked his big
Dick.
185
00:08:14,393 --> 00:08:19,599
[ whoosh! Plunk! ]
>> [ laughs ]
186
00:08:19,665 --> 00:08:22,735
The perfect crime.
187
00:08:22,802 --> 00:08:30,843
[ breathing heavily, sobbing ]
Everyone! Come quick!
188
00:08:30,910 --> 00:08:36,649
I-I-I think -- a-a-a hunter got
J-j-j-jerry!
189
00:08:36,716 --> 00:08:42,688
[ sobs ]
Jerry!
190
00:08:42,755 --> 00:08:45,524
[ thunder crashes ]
>> oh, no!
191
00:08:45,591 --> 00:08:49,128
We'll never be able to finish
Building this barn in time!
192
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:51,664
>> we got to do a lot in a short
Time.
193
00:08:51,731 --> 00:08:53,299
Only one man can help us.
194
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:54,367
>> both: montage!
195
00:08:54,433 --> 00:08:56,168
>> [ jamaican accent ] Hey, mon!
196
00:08:56,235 --> 00:09:01,007
With montage magic, we build
That barn in no time!
197
00:09:01,073 --> 00:09:02,208
Boop-boop!
198
00:09:02,275 --> 00:09:06,812
>> ♪ I'm workin' on my time ♪
♪ whoa, oh ♪
199
00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:10,383
♪ I'm workin' on my time ♪
♪ whoa-- ♪
200
00:09:10,449 --> 00:09:11,517
>> that's so great!
201
00:09:11,584 --> 00:09:13,352
Thank you, montage!
202
00:09:13,419 --> 00:09:14,787
>> iay, dios mío!
203
00:09:14,854 --> 00:09:17,023
Iun niño está robando mi
Televisión!
204
00:09:17,089 --> 00:09:18,157
>> hold on, ma'am.
205
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:21,527
You seem pretty uppity about
Something, but I don't speak
206
00:09:21,594 --> 00:09:22,194
Spanish!
207
00:09:22,261 --> 00:09:23,729
>> no problem, mon!
208
00:09:23,796 --> 00:09:27,700
I'll help you learn spanish in
No time!
209
00:09:27,767 --> 00:09:28,601
Boop-boop!
210
00:09:28,668 --> 00:09:31,137
>> ♪ it's 12 feet from the
Living room ♪
211
00:09:31,203 --> 00:09:33,306
♪ a few more chords for the
Song, we'll be done soon ♪
212
00:09:33,372 --> 00:09:36,442
♪ five hours of pedaling ♪
♪ a few more songs like this
213
00:09:36,509 --> 00:09:39,779
And it'll be spring ♪
>> iun niño está robando mi
214
00:09:39,845 --> 00:09:40,947
Televisión!
215
00:09:41,013 --> 00:09:41,881
Ino!
216
00:09:41,948 --> 00:09:43,983
>> she says a kid's stealing her
Television!
217
00:09:44,050 --> 00:09:46,352
>> oh, mon! Come on! Let's go!
218
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:49,588
>> ioy, mi casa está cinco
Millas de aquí!
219
00:09:49,655 --> 00:09:50,723
>> bombaclott say what?
220
00:09:50,790 --> 00:09:52,591
>> her house is five miles from
Here.
221
00:09:52,658 --> 00:09:55,628
>> no problem, mon! [ laughs ]
Boop-boop!
222
00:09:55,695 --> 00:09:59,832
>> ♪ now we got a fast car ♪
♪ you can far both ways ♪
223
00:09:59,899 --> 00:10:03,436
[ singing indistinctly ]
♪ you can wind up with big
224
00:10:03,502 --> 00:10:04,937
Pain ♪
>> wow!
225
00:10:05,004 --> 00:10:06,672
That only took 10 seconds!
226
00:10:06,739 --> 00:10:08,574
>> ioh! Imi televisión!
227
00:10:08,641 --> 00:10:11,844
>> hey, mon, drop the
Television!
228
00:10:11,911 --> 00:10:12,778
>> no.
229
00:10:12,845 --> 00:10:14,981
>> then get ready to have
Alzheimer's, mon!
230
00:10:15,047 --> 00:10:15,915
Boop-boop!
231
00:10:15,982 --> 00:10:17,984
>> ♪ boo-boo-boo ♪
♪ boo-boo-boo-boo ♪
232
00:10:18,050 --> 00:10:20,353
♪ boo-boo-boo ♪
♪ boo-boo ♪
233
00:10:20,419 --> 00:10:22,722
♪ boo-boo-boo ♪
♪ boo-boo-boo-boo-boo ♪
234
00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:24,890
♪ boo-boo-boo ♪
♪ boo-boo ♪
235
00:10:24,957 --> 00:10:26,759
>> ohh! My back!
236
00:10:26,826 --> 00:10:29,161
>> ioh, gracias, montage!
237
00:10:29,228 --> 00:10:32,198
>> now I'm off to give
Mousy-looking girls makeovers
238
00:10:32,264 --> 00:10:34,200
Just in time for the prom!
239
00:10:34,266 --> 00:10:36,068
>> not so fast, montage!
240
00:10:36,135 --> 00:10:37,003
>> oh, no!
241
00:10:37,069 --> 00:10:39,572
It's my evil nemesis,
End-credits mon!
242
00:10:39,638 --> 00:10:42,608
Quickly, let's all get out of
Here before he --
243
00:10:42,675 --> 00:10:45,011
>> ♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
244
00:10:45,077 --> 00:10:47,146
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ♪
245
00:10:47,213 --> 00:10:49,281
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
246
00:10:49,348 --> 00:10:51,450
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ♪
247
00:10:51,517 --> 00:10:53,586
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪
248
00:10:53,652 --> 00:10:55,788
♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk
Bawk bawk ♪
249
00:10:55,855 --> 00:10:58,157
Ba-gawk! Bawk.
17702
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