Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,269 --> 00:00:07,474
♪♪
2
00:00:07,540 --> 00:00:09,075
Grr!
3
00:00:09,142 --> 00:00:10,043
Grr!
4
00:00:10,110 --> 00:00:13,012
Everybody say "Grr!"
-grr!
5
00:00:13,079 --> 00:00:14,748
[ child laughing ]
6
00:00:14,814 --> 00:00:21,588
♪♪
7
00:00:21,654 --> 00:00:25,825
Welcome to "The walking dead"
Museum.
8
00:00:25,892 --> 00:00:28,762
Once our entire species
Faced extinction
9
00:00:28,828 --> 00:00:31,765
In an event known as
"The walkpocalypse."
10
00:00:31,831 --> 00:00:33,967
Ooh!
11
00:00:34,033 --> 00:00:34,868
Aah!
12
00:00:34,934 --> 00:00:36,636
[ tapping ]
13
00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:38,138
[ camera shutter clicking ]
14
00:00:38,204 --> 00:00:39,906
After the disease
Was cured,
15
00:00:39,973 --> 00:00:42,342
And it was cured,
Completely,
16
00:00:42,409 --> 00:00:43,676
Both
The walker saliva version
17
00:00:43,743 --> 00:00:45,678
And that thing where
Everyone's infected, anyway,
18
00:00:45,745 --> 00:00:47,847
We built this museum
To remember
19
00:00:47,914 --> 00:00:51,050
The heroes who saved humanity
From walkers like me.
20
00:00:51,117 --> 00:00:52,919
Rawr!
[ laughs ]
21
00:00:52,986 --> 00:00:55,054
And we're walkers,
And we're walkers.
22
00:00:55,121 --> 00:00:57,624
This is so cool!
23
00:00:57,690 --> 00:01:00,460
This room is dedicated to the
Members of rick and the gang,
24
00:01:00,527 --> 00:01:01,761
As they were known.
25
00:01:01,828 --> 00:01:04,397
Records are spotty,
But we believe the leader,
26
00:01:04,464 --> 00:01:06,966
Rick gremlin, was either
In law enforcement
27
00:01:07,033 --> 00:01:09,602
Or a member of
A village people tribute van.
28
00:01:09,669 --> 00:01:13,440
Rick had one child,
A beautiful girl named carla.
29
00:01:13,506 --> 00:01:16,042
Together, they battled
The undead and the living,
30
00:01:16,109 --> 00:01:17,610
Including this monster,
31
00:01:17,676 --> 00:01:20,213
Whom the scriptures
Call neegnon.
32
00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:24,517
He was the leader of a rival
Softball team, the lucilles.
33
00:01:24,584 --> 00:01:26,519
They finally brokered
A truce
34
00:01:26,586 --> 00:01:29,489
When the lovely carla
Agreed to marry neegnon.
35
00:01:29,556 --> 00:01:33,359
This exquisite barbed wire bat
Was likely a wedding gift.
36
00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:36,628
Neegnon and carla were
Happily married for many years
37
00:01:36,696 --> 00:01:38,731
And had
At least six children.
38
00:01:38,798 --> 00:01:41,067
And we're walkers,
And we're walkers.
39
00:01:41,134 --> 00:01:44,170
Oh, boy, I never knew
All these amazing facts.
40
00:01:44,237 --> 00:01:47,207
That's because
They're a load of crap!
41
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:51,044
Oh, my gosh,
Are you the lovely carla?
42
00:01:51,110 --> 00:01:52,878
It's carl!
I'm so sorry, my lady.
43
00:01:52,946 --> 00:01:54,714
This whole museum
Is wrong!
44
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:57,417
You wanna know the whole story?
Do ya?
45
00:01:57,484 --> 00:02:00,620
Uh, will we still have time
To hit the gift shop after?
46
00:02:00,687 --> 00:02:03,156
I'm giving you
The gift...
47
00:02:03,223 --> 00:02:05,191
Of truth.
48
00:02:05,258 --> 00:02:06,860
Yeah, but...
49
00:02:06,926 --> 00:02:08,961
The gift shop closes
At 5:00.
50
00:02:09,027 --> 00:02:12,765
Let me tell you
How it really happened.
51
00:02:14,801 --> 00:02:15,602
[ camera shutter clicks ]
52
00:02:18,738 --> 00:02:22,141
[ chickens clucking
"The walking dead" theme song ]
53
00:02:22,208 --> 00:02:29,983
♪♪
54
00:02:30,049 --> 00:02:37,757
♪♪
55
00:02:37,824 --> 00:02:40,760
It began,
As all good stories do,
56
00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:42,829
With a monkey.
57
00:02:42,896 --> 00:02:45,465
Any idea what caused
The outbreak, dr. Jenner?
58
00:02:45,531 --> 00:02:47,466
I bet it's monkeys.
It's always monkeys.
59
00:02:47,534 --> 00:02:49,769
Actually, no,
It's a common misconception
60
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:52,372
That some lonely wanderer
In an african jungle
61
00:02:52,438 --> 00:02:54,641
Gets his rocks off
In a hapless primate,
62
00:02:54,707 --> 00:02:57,210
Doesn't bother to wipe,
Comes home, and bangs his wife,
63
00:02:57,277 --> 00:02:59,045
And then boom,
You've got the aids,
64
00:02:59,112 --> 00:03:01,047
But that's not
How science works.
65
00:03:01,114 --> 00:03:04,884
So...It's cool
To fuck monkeys?
66
00:03:04,951 --> 00:03:07,987
Whoo-hoo!
-going to the congo!
67
00:03:08,054 --> 00:03:10,456
[ monkey chittering ]
68
00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:14,260
Yes, marlee, they bought it,
Now shut up and kiss me.
69
00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:17,430
It's just us now.
70
00:03:17,497 --> 00:03:20,533
Rick said I should
Look after you, and I will.
71
00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:22,702
[ gasps ]
Shane, what are you doing?
72
00:03:22,769 --> 00:03:25,171
Rick said I should treat you
Like you were my wife.
73
00:03:25,238 --> 00:03:29,075
He what?
Rick also said I should
Touch your chest muffins.
74
00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:31,477
Shane! Get out!
75
00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:33,546
Now, listen, lori,
I don't want to do this,
76
00:03:33,613 --> 00:03:35,448
But rick said
I should shower with you.
77
00:03:35,515 --> 00:03:37,617
Because he said
I should wash your butt,
78
00:03:37,684 --> 00:03:39,686
And rick was very clear
About that.
79
00:03:39,752 --> 00:03:43,456
Lori! Carl!
I'm back!
80
00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:46,559
Rick said that
You should not tell rick
81
00:03:46,626 --> 00:03:48,861
Anything that I said rick said
We should do at rick's behest.
82
00:03:48,928 --> 00:03:50,630
Rick said "Behest"?
83
00:03:50,697 --> 00:03:52,298
Rick said you'd say that.
84
00:03:52,365 --> 00:03:53,800
[ zombies moaning ]
85
00:03:53,866 --> 00:03:55,702
I think deep inside,
They hang onto
86
00:03:55,768 --> 00:03:57,804
The memories
Of what they used to be.
87
00:03:57,870 --> 00:04:00,139
Then this one must remember
Crouching on her roof
88
00:04:00,206 --> 00:04:01,641
To scare away
Evil spirits.
89
00:04:01,708 --> 00:04:03,943
She's one gargoyle-looking,
Fuggo three-bagger.
90
00:04:04,010 --> 00:04:05,178
That's my wife.
91
00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:08,114
Whoo-whee!
Gorgeous woman.
92
00:04:08,181 --> 00:04:09,983
I'm so sorry
For your loss.
93
00:04:10,049 --> 00:04:13,353
She remembers
This is our home.
94
00:04:13,419 --> 00:04:15,121
I wonder what else
They remember.
95
00:04:17,790 --> 00:04:19,392
[ band music playing ]
96
00:04:19,459 --> 00:04:23,363
[ zombies moaning ]
97
00:04:23,429 --> 00:04:25,898
Some things never change,
Huh?
98
00:04:25,965 --> 00:04:28,301
I wonder what this one
Remembers.
99
00:04:28,368 --> 00:04:30,203
[ zombies moaning ]
100
00:04:30,269 --> 00:04:31,371
Morgan: oh, shit!
101
00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:34,641
He's a goddamn
Master locksmith!
102
00:04:34,707 --> 00:04:37,243
Bastards left me up here
To die!
103
00:04:37,310 --> 00:04:40,813
Alone!
Am I so damn horrible?
104
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:44,117
Don't merle
Get to fall in love?!
105
00:04:44,183 --> 00:04:47,587
♪ some place
In this nightmare world ♪
106
00:04:47,654 --> 00:04:51,524
♪ is someone
Who thinks the same way ♪
107
00:04:51,591 --> 00:04:55,361
♪ that chicks are dumb,
And racism's fun ♪
108
00:04:55,428 --> 00:05:00,299
♪ and saying the "N" word
Is okay ♪
109
00:05:00,366 --> 00:05:04,737
♪ and love's getting high
On pcp ♪
110
00:05:04,804 --> 00:05:11,010
♪ is there anyone out there with
The same kind of brain as me? ♪
111
00:05:11,077 --> 00:05:14,514
[ zombie moaning
Musically ]
112
00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:18,084
♪ somewhere
There's a match for me ♪
113
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:21,688
[ moaning continues ]
♪ a stupid,
Brainless girl ♪
114
00:05:21,754 --> 00:05:26,359
♪ who also doesn't care
For jews ♪
115
00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:30,797
[ moaning continues ]
♪ and shares
All my small-minded views ♪
116
00:05:30,863 --> 00:05:38,371
♪ I'll find you some place
In this nightmare world ♪
117
00:05:38,438 --> 00:05:40,606
For you, my sugar tits.
118
00:05:42,308 --> 00:05:43,810
Unicorn:
Looking for something, friend?
119
00:05:43,876 --> 00:05:44,877
[ neighs ]
120
00:05:44,944 --> 00:05:46,412
Yeah, gas.
121
00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:49,415
Oh, I know
Where there's plenty of gas.
122
00:05:49,482 --> 00:05:50,950
Hop on,
And I'll show you.
123
00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:53,252
Okay.
Let's find you a saddle.
124
00:05:53,319 --> 00:05:56,789
I prefer if you ride me
Raw dog.
125
00:05:56,856 --> 00:05:57,924
What?
126
00:05:57,990 --> 00:06:00,059
How bad
Do you want that gas?
127
00:06:02,662 --> 00:06:06,833
Rick, I hope you know
I appreciated your enthusiasm,
128
00:06:06,899 --> 00:06:08,801
And I still respect you.
129
00:06:08,868 --> 00:06:12,772
Also, sorry about your shirt.
I was aiming for your hair.
130
00:06:14,474 --> 00:06:15,975
Aah!
Uh-oh!
131
00:06:16,042 --> 00:06:17,477
Oh, this doesn't look
Good!
132
00:06:17,543 --> 00:06:18,511
[ gunshots ]
133
00:06:18,578 --> 00:06:19,946
Aah!
134
00:06:20,012 --> 00:06:22,248
Now I'll never see my wife
And son!
135
00:06:22,315 --> 00:06:24,851
Ooh, wait, you've got a son?
How old?
What difference --
136
00:06:24,917 --> 00:06:26,886
No time, how old?!
12.
137
00:06:26,953 --> 00:06:29,655
Now we've both got
Something to live for!
138
00:06:29,722 --> 00:06:30,490
[ thud ]
139
00:06:30,556 --> 00:06:33,292
[ splattering ]
140
00:06:33,359 --> 00:06:35,728
[ whinnying ]
141
00:06:35,795 --> 00:06:38,231
Grr!
142
00:06:38,297 --> 00:06:40,233
We've got 'em on the run now,
Rick!
143
00:06:40,299 --> 00:06:41,768
[ wind whistles ]
144
00:06:41,834 --> 00:06:43,436
Uhh, rick?
145
00:06:43,503 --> 00:06:45,805
[ zombies moaning ]
Ow, it hurts...
146
00:06:45,872 --> 00:06:46,773
So good!
147
00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:48,274
Bite me harder there.
148
00:06:48,341 --> 00:06:51,677
Ahh, shit.
That unicorn was right.
149
00:06:51,744 --> 00:06:53,913
This is never coming out.
150
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:55,782
These walker gut ponchos
151
00:06:55,848 --> 00:06:58,951
Are the perfect disguise
So we blend in.
152
00:06:59,018 --> 00:07:03,823
[ '70s music playing ]
153
00:07:03,890 --> 00:07:05,725
God damn it, carl!
154
00:07:05,792 --> 00:07:08,261
Sophia! Sophia!
155
00:07:08,327 --> 00:07:10,329
I'm pretty sure
I left her right here!
156
00:07:10,396 --> 00:07:11,731
Carol: rick! Sophia!
157
00:07:11,798 --> 00:07:12,832
Uh-oh!
158
00:07:14,433 --> 00:07:15,501
Where's sophia?
159
00:07:15,568 --> 00:07:17,436
What do you mean?
She's right here.
160
00:07:17,503 --> 00:07:20,206
[ high-pitched]
Hi, mama, it's me, sophia.
161
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,441
Rick, what the fuck
Are you doing?
162
00:07:22,508 --> 00:07:24,577
[ normally ] Nothing,
Some walkers came,
163
00:07:24,644 --> 00:07:27,380
I drove 'em off, and sophia hid
Here, right, sophia?
164
00:07:27,446 --> 00:07:29,782
[ high-pitched ]
Yeah, mama, mr. Rick saved me.
165
00:07:29,849 --> 00:07:32,451
I like him. He's nice.
166
00:07:32,518 --> 00:07:34,620
Rick,
You're holding a log.
167
00:07:34,687 --> 00:07:36,689
[ normally ] Carol,
If you're going to fat shame
168
00:07:36,756 --> 00:07:39,125
This little girl of yours,
I'm not gonna stand for it.
169
00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:41,394
Stop it!
Look over there,
There's some walkers!
170
00:07:41,460 --> 00:07:43,663
Sorry, sophia,
You're on your own!
171
00:07:43,729 --> 00:07:45,264
[ tires squealing ]
172
00:07:45,331 --> 00:07:46,699
[ zombies moaning ]
173
00:07:46,766 --> 00:07:48,367
Dale, turn back.
We're not gonna make it.
174
00:07:48,433 --> 00:07:50,503
We'll make it! [ laughs ]
175
00:07:50,570 --> 00:07:53,172
♪ dale, dale, the rv king
176
00:07:53,239 --> 00:07:57,643
♪ jumps the shit out of
Everything ♪
177
00:07:57,710 --> 00:07:59,946
Yeah!
178
00:08:00,012 --> 00:08:02,548
♪ dale, dale the rv king
179
00:08:02,615 --> 00:08:06,185
♪ all the fine dames
Get a prime porking ♪
180
00:08:06,252 --> 00:08:09,422
[ laughs ]
181
00:08:09,488 --> 00:08:11,958
Oh, yeah.
182
00:08:12,024 --> 00:08:14,427
That's what I was trying to
Take my mind off of.
183
00:08:14,493 --> 00:08:15,661
[ screams ]
184
00:08:15,728 --> 00:08:17,697
Get ready.
Walkers!
185
00:08:17,763 --> 00:08:19,465
Hey, that's our word!
186
00:08:19,532 --> 00:08:21,300
You don't have the right!
187
00:08:21,367 --> 00:08:24,170
Hershel, you need
To come back home.
188
00:08:24,237 --> 00:08:25,438
Beth needs you.
189
00:08:25,504 --> 00:08:27,306
I had a drinking problem,
Rick.
190
00:08:27,373 --> 00:08:29,742
It nearly tore my family
Apart.
191
00:08:29,809 --> 00:08:33,212
I was a different man
When I was on the sauce.
192
00:08:33,279 --> 00:08:35,014
What do you mean?
193
00:08:35,081 --> 00:08:38,417
[ rock music plays ]
Come on!
194
00:08:38,484 --> 00:08:39,585
They're mine!
195
00:08:39,652 --> 00:08:42,054
[ laughs ]
Let's get it on!
196
00:08:42,121 --> 00:08:44,423
I got your pouch, joey!
[ bell rings ]
197
00:08:44,490 --> 00:08:45,758
[ laughs ]
198
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:47,260
I'm off to the moon!
199
00:08:47,326 --> 00:08:49,395
Holy shit.
200
00:08:49,462 --> 00:08:52,565
Who won,
You or the kangaroo?
201
00:08:52,632 --> 00:08:56,102
Like I said, I was
A different man back then.
202
00:08:57,570 --> 00:08:58,704
[ rapid gunfire ]
203
00:08:58,771 --> 00:08:59,972
I'm out!
204
00:09:00,039 --> 00:09:02,041
Thanks.
205
00:09:02,108 --> 00:09:03,843
I'm out again!
206
00:09:05,611 --> 00:09:08,080
I'm so sorry
About your mama, carl.
207
00:09:08,147 --> 00:09:09,282
You go on now.
208
00:09:09,348 --> 00:09:10,950
I'll take care of her
Before she turns.
209
00:09:11,017 --> 00:09:11,984
No, maggie.
210
00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:14,220
I should be the one
To do it.
211
00:09:14,287 --> 00:09:16,088
All right, carl.
212
00:09:16,155 --> 00:09:18,457
Can I do it
Any way I want to?
213
00:09:18,524 --> 00:09:21,494
I -- I guess.
214
00:09:21,560 --> 00:09:26,098
[ moaning ]
215
00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:28,601
I love you, mom.
216
00:09:28,668 --> 00:09:33,139
[ fireworks exploding ]
217
00:09:33,205 --> 00:09:34,707
Hey, rick?
218
00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:36,609
Something's wrong
With that boy.
219
00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:42,248
[ rip ]
Aah!
220
00:09:42,315 --> 00:09:43,249
[ stapler fires ]
221
00:09:43,316 --> 00:09:44,317
One more, hold on.
222
00:09:44,383 --> 00:09:46,218
[ stapler fires ]
Ah, there we go.
223
00:09:46,285 --> 00:09:48,888
That ain't going anywhere,
Sugar pie.
224
00:09:48,955 --> 00:09:51,290
Look at the flowers,
Lizzie.
225
00:09:51,357 --> 00:09:53,859
[ gun cocks, fires ]
226
00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:56,195
Look at the bunny, lenny.
227
00:09:56,262 --> 00:09:57,063
The bunny?
228
00:09:57,129 --> 00:09:58,497
[ muffled shouting ]
229
00:09:58,564 --> 00:10:00,366
Look at the indian,
Mcmurphy.
230
00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:01,300
[ gunshot ]
231
00:10:01,367 --> 00:10:02,401
[ dog barking ]
232
00:10:02,468 --> 00:10:04,470
Eat shit, old yeller.
[ gunshot ]
233
00:10:04,537 --> 00:10:06,505
Look at the flowers --
234
00:10:06,572 --> 00:10:08,441
No!
[ gunshot ]
235
00:10:08,507 --> 00:10:10,643
Wow, lady,
You are cold.
236
00:10:10,710 --> 00:10:12,445
Look at the flowers,
Fellas.
237
00:10:12,511 --> 00:10:13,279
Oh, no!
[ gunshots ]
238
00:10:13,346 --> 00:10:14,580
[ thudding ]
239
00:10:14,647 --> 00:10:16,716
You, look at the flowers.
[ gun cocks, fires ]
240
00:10:20,853 --> 00:10:24,690
It's like they say, it's always
Darkest before the dawn.
241
00:10:24,757 --> 00:10:26,125
Unless your friend
Shoots you in the eye
242
00:10:26,192 --> 00:10:27,360
While you're covered
In walker guts.
243
00:10:27,426 --> 00:10:28,761
But I behest.
244
00:10:28,828 --> 00:10:29,895
Wait,
Am I using that right?
245
00:10:29,962 --> 00:10:30,796
No.
246
00:10:30,863 --> 00:10:32,898
What was terminus like?
247
00:10:32,965 --> 00:10:35,334
Like if evil and hatred
Met on tinder
248
00:10:35,401 --> 00:10:37,169
And didn't
Really hit it off,
249
00:10:37,236 --> 00:10:38,304
But hatred had money,
250
00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:40,206
So at some point,
Evil was curious,
251
00:10:40,272 --> 00:10:42,975
And the cocaine
Fell like snow.
252
00:10:43,042 --> 00:10:44,844
[ laughs ]
What are you talking about?
253
00:10:44,910 --> 00:10:48,347
The food
Was made of people!
254
00:10:48,414 --> 00:10:50,415
Even the chocolate
Butt pudding?
255
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:53,652
Especially
The chocolate butt pudding.
256
00:10:53,719 --> 00:10:56,655
"Terminus --
Sanctuary for all"?
257
00:10:56,722 --> 00:10:58,290
"Community for all"?
258
00:10:58,357 --> 00:11:00,693
"Those who arrive survive"?
259
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:02,161
Wait, what's that say
At the bottom?
260
00:11:02,228 --> 00:11:03,696
Free musical theater?
261
00:11:03,763 --> 00:11:05,398
I love musical theater.
262
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:07,900
I don't know.
It sounds suspicious.
263
00:11:10,202 --> 00:11:12,371
Welcome to terminus!
264
00:11:12,438 --> 00:11:15,341
Now, sit back
And enjoy the show!
265
00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:17,543
[ upbeat broadway-style music
Playing ]
266
00:11:17,610 --> 00:11:20,179
♪ oh, welcome to terminus
267
00:11:20,246 --> 00:11:21,881
♪ where you'll be
Safe and sound ♪
268
00:11:21,947 --> 00:11:23,616
♪ 'cause we would
Never eat you ♪
269
00:11:23,682 --> 00:11:25,284
♪ so please
Don't turn around ♪
270
00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:27,119
♪ oh, yes, it's terminus
271
00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:29,255
♪ and it's a pleasure
To meet you ♪
272
00:11:29,321 --> 00:11:33,559
♪ and we're definitely
100% not going to eat you ♪
273
00:11:33,626 --> 00:11:35,528
This is pretty great.
What a troupe.
274
00:11:35,594 --> 00:11:37,063
I feel like they're
Over-emphasizing
275
00:11:37,129 --> 00:11:38,431
That they're
Not gonna eat us.
276
00:11:38,497 --> 00:11:39,865
No, I just think
They're being funny.
277
00:11:39,932 --> 00:11:41,600
♪ this is the safest place
278
00:11:41,667 --> 00:11:43,235
♪ we really hope you'll stay
279
00:11:43,302 --> 00:11:46,839
♪ we'll only eat your ass
In a sexual way ♪
280
00:11:46,906 --> 00:11:48,574
♪ oh, yes, it's terminus
281
00:11:48,641 --> 00:11:50,443
♪ and we're not cannibals
282
00:11:50,509 --> 00:11:52,378
♪ we promise
Not to slaughter you ♪
283
00:11:52,445 --> 00:11:55,915
♪ and eat you
Like you're animals ♪
284
00:11:55,981 --> 00:11:57,850
♪ terminus
Yeah! Jazz hands!
285
00:11:57,917 --> 00:11:59,518
Yep, they're definitely
Gonna eat us.
286
00:11:59,585 --> 00:12:02,021
I wonder
If they sell merch.
287
00:12:02,088 --> 00:12:05,925
Walker: [ moaning ]
288
00:12:05,991 --> 00:12:08,260
Hello! I am hungry!
289
00:12:08,327 --> 00:12:11,130
Are you hungry?
I would like to eat!
290
00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:13,732
Human!
That human smells good!
291
00:12:13,799 --> 00:12:15,768
I will eat him!
Do not run!
292
00:12:15,835 --> 00:12:17,103
Come back so I can eat you!
293
00:12:17,169 --> 00:12:18,370
Oh, whoops!
294
00:12:18,437 --> 00:12:21,173
I am on the ground.
Why am I on the ground?
295
00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:24,143
I am hungry!
I want to eat the human!
296
00:12:24,210 --> 00:12:26,679
[ grunts ]
Where did the human go?
297
00:12:26,745 --> 00:12:28,948
I want to eat him!
I am hungry!
298
00:12:29,014 --> 00:12:30,850
[ rapid gunfire ]
Human!
299
00:12:30,916 --> 00:12:32,384
Hello!
Ooh!
300
00:12:32,451 --> 00:12:34,053
Hello!
Uh-oh!
301
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:35,688
Oh, hello, little girl.
302
00:12:35,754 --> 00:12:36,689
[ gunshot ]
303
00:12:36,755 --> 00:12:38,724
I want to eat your hair.
304
00:12:38,790 --> 00:12:40,025
[ grunts ]
Trip!
305
00:12:40,092 --> 00:12:41,227
Hello!
306
00:12:41,293 --> 00:12:42,928
Why is your foot in my face?
307
00:12:42,995 --> 00:12:44,763
I do not want to eat your shoe.
308
00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:46,031
I do not like shoes.
309
00:12:46,098 --> 00:12:47,266
Come on, carl!
310
00:12:47,333 --> 00:12:49,401
Wait!
I have not eaten you yet!
311
00:12:49,468 --> 00:12:50,970
I am hungry!
312
00:12:51,036 --> 00:12:53,472
Trip!
Goodbye, human!
313
00:12:53,539 --> 00:12:56,942
I am walking very fast now!
Is this flying?
314
00:12:57,009 --> 00:12:58,911
I did not know I could fly.
315
00:12:58,978 --> 00:13:00,146
Oh, hello, ground.
316
00:13:00,212 --> 00:13:03,549
Hello, hello, hello.
317
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:06,085
Hello, body.
318
00:13:06,152 --> 00:13:07,953
I am hungry.
319
00:13:08,020 --> 00:13:10,756
We're not gonna be using
The front gate anymore.
320
00:13:10,823 --> 00:13:12,758
It's too much
Of a security risk.
321
00:13:12,825 --> 00:13:14,293
Rick!
How do we get in?
322
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:16,162
The signal
Will be the same,
323
00:13:16,228 --> 00:13:18,164
But we'll have a new method
Of answering.
324
00:13:18,230 --> 00:13:19,298
[ whistles ]
325
00:13:22,067 --> 00:13:23,602
Hairway to heaven.
326
00:13:23,669 --> 00:13:25,070
[ grunts ]
327
00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:28,007
[ zombies moaning ]
Nicholas!
Stop pushing on the door!
328
00:13:28,073 --> 00:13:30,042
Screw you, glenn!
I'm getting out of here!
329
00:13:30,109 --> 00:13:31,677
[ groans ]
330
00:13:31,744 --> 00:13:35,014
[ zombie moaning ]
331
00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:36,282
Noah:
Nicholas, you'll kill us!
332
00:13:36,348 --> 00:13:37,349
Better you than me!
333
00:13:40,986 --> 00:13:43,389
No, no!
No, glenn!
334
00:13:47,893 --> 00:13:50,829
Ahh, glenn, you could have saved
Me, but you didn't, glenn!
335
00:13:50,896 --> 00:13:51,830
[ screams ]
336
00:13:51,897 --> 00:13:53,766
Glenn: no, noah!
337
00:13:53,832 --> 00:13:55,201
Oh, my god, no!
338
00:13:59,538 --> 00:14:01,907
[ laughs ] You sold out
Your friends in a hurry, eugene.
339
00:14:01,974 --> 00:14:05,010
Actually, dwight, it was just
A distraction to do this.
340
00:14:05,077 --> 00:14:06,512
Aah, my penis!
341
00:14:06,579 --> 00:14:09,014
Dwight's penis:
Hi, I'm dwight's penis!
342
00:14:09,081 --> 00:14:12,384
You ever think to yourself,
How did I get here?
343
00:14:12,451 --> 00:14:15,221
It all started
Not too long ago...
344
00:14:15,287 --> 00:14:17,489
Negan:
Did you hear that?
345
00:14:17,556 --> 00:14:20,125
He said, "Suck my nuts!"
346
00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:23,529
[ laughs ]
Hot diggity dog!
347
00:14:23,596 --> 00:14:24,496
[ upbeat music plays ]
348
00:14:24,563 --> 00:14:26,031
♪ hey, negan
349
00:14:26,098 --> 00:14:28,267
♪ show us
How you do that thing ♪
350
00:14:28,334 --> 00:14:30,236
Mm, what thing?
351
00:14:30,302 --> 00:14:32,037
♪ that dip
352
00:14:32,104 --> 00:14:34,607
♪ the one you do
Right after you swing ♪
353
00:14:34,673 --> 00:14:36,575
Oh, you mean this?
354
00:14:36,642 --> 00:14:39,612
♪ when you're bashin' in brains
Or deliverin' quips ♪
355
00:14:39,678 --> 00:14:43,515
♪ just lean way back
And do the negan dip, yeah ♪
356
00:14:43,582 --> 00:14:45,718
Ooh, like this?
357
00:14:45,784 --> 00:14:49,021
Yeah, you got it!
358
00:14:49,088 --> 00:14:50,723
[ music stops ]
359
00:14:50,789 --> 00:14:53,659
I do not appreciate
You killing my dance!
360
00:14:53,726 --> 00:14:55,928
[ screams ]
[ grunts ]
361
00:14:55,995 --> 00:14:58,130
[ laughs ]
362
00:14:58,197 --> 00:15:00,966
Look at that.
He's still got the beat.
363
00:15:01,033 --> 00:15:04,203
One, two, three, dip
364
00:15:04,270 --> 00:15:07,606
The truth is,
I'm not even a real tiger.
365
00:15:07,673 --> 00:15:09,942
I did some community theater
Back in the day.
366
00:15:10,009 --> 00:15:12,911
Cowardly lion, grizabella,
Cat from outer space,
367
00:15:12,978 --> 00:15:13,946
Blah, blah, blah.
368
00:15:14,013 --> 00:15:15,614
But when everything
Went to hell,
369
00:15:15,681 --> 00:15:16,915
People needed something,
370
00:15:16,982 --> 00:15:20,152
So here's shiva.
371
00:15:20,219 --> 00:15:22,721
We got your guns, fools.
You know why?
372
00:15:22,788 --> 00:15:25,758
'cause we are the saviors!
373
00:15:25,824 --> 00:15:26,959
Oh!
374
00:15:27,026 --> 00:15:28,394
Piece of shit!
375
00:15:28,460 --> 00:15:30,095
Aah!
376
00:15:30,162 --> 00:15:32,631
You know what we need?
-guns.
377
00:15:32,698 --> 00:15:34,233
-a spine.
-maybe ding dongs?
378
00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:37,169
We need a name that tells people
We mean business.
379
00:15:37,236 --> 00:15:40,139
Negan's got the saviors,
And that just sounds cool.
380
00:15:40,205 --> 00:15:43,042
Then there's the wolves,
Also awesome.
381
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:44,643
Terminus cannibals,
382
00:15:44,710 --> 00:15:47,746
The kingdom comers,
The baseball furies.
383
00:15:47,813 --> 00:15:49,214
-what is he --
-just let him run.
384
00:15:49,281 --> 00:15:52,851
So, I been kicking around some
Ideas, and I think I've got it.
385
00:15:52,918 --> 00:15:55,354
Rick and the gang.
386
00:15:55,421 --> 00:15:57,589
-uhh --
-umm --
387
00:15:57,656 --> 00:15:58,924
Maybe we throw out
Some other ideas.
388
00:15:58,991 --> 00:16:00,326
The wham bam clan!
389
00:16:00,392 --> 00:16:02,328
The stabby crew!
No!
390
00:16:02,394 --> 00:16:03,796
No, no!
391
00:16:03,862 --> 00:16:05,431
We're rick and the gang.
392
00:16:05,497 --> 00:16:06,665
I already made t-shirts.
393
00:16:06,732 --> 00:16:08,767
Oh, fuck no.
394
00:16:08,834 --> 00:16:11,537
Ahh, I got the jacket,
395
00:16:11,603 --> 00:16:14,673
But I'm missing that one thing
That really says
396
00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:17,543
"Stylish, yet dangerous."
397
00:16:17,609 --> 00:16:21,447
Well,
Looky what we have here.
398
00:16:21,513 --> 00:16:23,482
[ "Linus and lucy" playing ]
399
00:16:23,549 --> 00:16:25,217
[ record needle scratches ]
Perfecto.
400
00:16:25,284 --> 00:16:27,753
Waaah!
401
00:16:27,820 --> 00:16:31,857
Now, show me
That badass eye hole, kid.
402
00:16:33,792 --> 00:16:34,993
Now, that is --
403
00:16:35,060 --> 00:16:37,663
[ wind howls ]
404
00:16:37,730 --> 00:16:40,265
My god!
Aah!
405
00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:43,435
I've made
A terrible mist--
406
00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:45,704
Announcer: from the creators
Of "The walking dead"
407
00:16:45,771 --> 00:16:49,174
Comes a show which reunites
Its most beloved characters.
408
00:16:49,241 --> 00:16:51,410
Glenn!
Dinnertime!
409
00:16:51,477 --> 00:16:52,344
Huh?
410
00:16:52,411 --> 00:16:53,645
Yeah.
411
00:16:53,712 --> 00:16:56,215
It's "Happy glenndings."
412
00:16:56,281 --> 00:16:59,852
Sure, it's taken
Some getting used to, but...
413
00:16:59,918 --> 00:17:01,854
I got my glenn.
414
00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:04,890
I'll find you!
415
00:17:04,957 --> 00:17:06,959
I'll find you!
416
00:17:07,025 --> 00:17:10,396
I'll find you!
417
00:17:10,462 --> 00:17:14,665
We play
A lot of hide and seek.
418
00:17:14,733 --> 00:17:16,902
Glenn, I love you.
419
00:17:16,969 --> 00:17:19,070
I'll find you!
420
00:17:22,775 --> 00:17:26,345
Go on, daryl.
Lucille wants to hear you sing.
421
00:17:26,412 --> 00:17:28,313
♪ uhhhh
422
00:17:28,380 --> 00:17:30,149
No!
What does it say?
423
00:17:30,215 --> 00:17:34,119
It's an "A."
Now, give me a sweet a, daryl!
424
00:17:34,186 --> 00:17:35,154
♪ aaaaah
425
00:17:35,220 --> 00:17:37,089
That is a g!
426
00:17:37,156 --> 00:17:38,690
I want an
♪ aaaa
427
00:17:38,757 --> 00:17:41,059
So meet me up
♪ here
428
00:17:41,126 --> 00:17:43,395
Well, well.
[ bangs ]
429
00:17:43,462 --> 00:17:46,131
I can tell you little piggies
Have been bad little piggies.
430
00:17:46,198 --> 00:17:47,466
[ engine revs ]
[ gagging ]
431
00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:49,067
[ laughs ]
432
00:17:49,134 --> 00:17:50,335
Fuck you, negan!
433
00:17:50,402 --> 00:17:53,672
[ snoopy laughing ]
434
00:17:57,476 --> 00:17:58,644
[ bottle lid pops ]
435
00:17:58,710 --> 00:18:00,479
[ chugging ]
436
00:18:00,546 --> 00:18:02,314
Come on,
Maggie, one more push!
437
00:18:02,381 --> 00:18:03,882
One more big push,
Come on!
438
00:18:03,949 --> 00:18:06,185
[ screams ]
439
00:18:06,251 --> 00:18:07,619
[ gasping ]
440
00:18:07,686 --> 00:18:12,391
It's -- it's -- it's --
It's -- it's a...B-boy?
441
00:18:12,458 --> 00:18:13,592
I-it's a boy!
442
00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:14,860
Does it look like glenn?
443
00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:16,895
Umm, umm, I mean --
Uh...
444
00:18:16,962 --> 00:18:18,197
Yep.
445
00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,032
I found you!
[ laughs ]
446
00:18:20,098 --> 00:18:21,900
Oh, wow.
447
00:18:21,967 --> 00:18:24,036
Is that how babies work?
448
00:18:24,102 --> 00:18:25,737
[ clapping ]
449
00:18:25,804 --> 00:18:30,676
Now, don't move, kid.
450
00:18:30,742 --> 00:18:32,744
Tweet, tweet, tweet,
Mother fucker
451
00:18:32,811 --> 00:18:34,146
That's a birdie!
452
00:18:34,213 --> 00:18:37,249
[ dramatic music playing ]
453
00:18:42,087 --> 00:18:43,989
[ rocket blasts off ]
454
00:18:46,158 --> 00:18:47,659
[ explosion ]
455
00:18:50,162 --> 00:18:52,164
My goodness,
What could it be?
456
00:18:52,231 --> 00:18:53,699
Some kinda rocket.
457
00:18:53,765 --> 00:18:54,700
[ air hisses ]
458
00:18:54,766 --> 00:18:55,901
It's a baby!
459
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:58,203
It's a bat!
It's a baby!
460
00:18:58,270 --> 00:19:00,439
I'm gonna name you
Lucille.
461
00:19:00,506 --> 00:19:04,209
[ grunting ]
462
00:19:04,276 --> 00:19:06,278
[ rapid hammering,
Saw whirring ]
463
00:19:07,579 --> 00:19:09,281
That's my bat.
464
00:19:09,348 --> 00:19:11,783
Lucille,
What are you doing here?
465
00:19:11,850 --> 00:19:14,686
Get lost!
466
00:19:14,753 --> 00:19:17,122
I know it's hard.
467
00:19:17,189 --> 00:19:19,491
You can do
All these amazing things,
468
00:19:19,558 --> 00:19:21,360
And you can't tell anybody,
469
00:19:21,426 --> 00:19:24,963
But if there's one thing
I do know, lucille,
470
00:19:25,030 --> 00:19:28,000
It's that you are here
For a reason.
471
00:19:30,969 --> 00:19:32,204
Die, negan!
472
00:19:32,271 --> 00:19:33,672
[ gunshot ]
473
00:19:33,739 --> 00:19:36,775
[ "Superman" theme-style music
Playing ]
474
00:19:36,842 --> 00:19:44,349
♪♪
475
00:19:44,416 --> 00:19:47,085
Wow.
She saved us all!
476
00:19:47,152 --> 00:19:49,054
That bat murdered
My friends!
477
00:19:49,121 --> 00:19:51,557
I don't know.
The video is pretty compelling.
478
00:19:51,623 --> 00:19:55,294
This way, people!
We saved the best for last!
479
00:19:55,360 --> 00:19:57,162
Feast your eyes upon...
480
00:19:57,229 --> 00:20:00,799
The last surviving walker
On earth.
481
00:20:00,866 --> 00:20:03,368
[ zombie moaning ]
482
00:20:03,435 --> 00:20:05,938
Oh, my gosh,
That is so awesome!
483
00:20:06,004 --> 00:20:07,439
Are you crazy?
484
00:20:07,506 --> 00:20:11,109
The nightmare will never be over
Until that thing is destroyed!
485
00:20:11,176 --> 00:20:12,578
[ gunshots,
Glass shatters ]
486
00:20:12,644 --> 00:20:14,513
[ screaming ]
487
00:20:14,580 --> 00:20:18,050
[ zombie moaning ]
488
00:20:18,116 --> 00:20:20,552
Smile,
You son of a biscuit!
489
00:20:20,619 --> 00:20:22,621
Just gotta get
A quick selfie first!
490
00:20:22,688 --> 00:20:23,755
[ gunshot ]
491
00:20:23,822 --> 00:20:25,524
The legend is true!
492
00:20:27,826 --> 00:20:29,661
[ gun clatters ]
493
00:20:29,728 --> 00:20:31,196
[ gun clicks ]
494
00:20:34,266 --> 00:20:35,901
[ grunting ]
495
00:20:37,803 --> 00:20:39,538
I've received
The proper compensation
496
00:20:39,605 --> 00:20:41,206
To initiate
The munitions process.
497
00:20:41,273 --> 00:20:42,975
Just hang onto your britches
A tick
498
00:20:43,041 --> 00:20:44,343
While I gather
The necessary tools
499
00:20:44,409 --> 00:20:45,811
To engage the delicate means
500
00:20:45,877 --> 00:20:47,179
To deliver
This bullet souvenir.
501
00:20:47,245 --> 00:20:48,580
Hurry the fudge up!
502
00:20:48,647 --> 00:20:50,282
The interesting thing
503
00:20:50,349 --> 00:20:52,584
About the pin-firing
.38 caliber projectile --
504
00:20:52,651 --> 00:20:54,686
It was actually
Not .38 caliber,
505
00:20:54,753 --> 00:20:57,489
But in fact, .375 caliber
Due to the fact --
506
00:20:57,556 --> 00:20:58,857
Yeah, got it.
Shut up, bullet!
507
00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,192
[ bullet clatters ]
508
00:21:02,194 --> 00:21:03,962
[ gunshot, splat! ]
509
00:21:04,029 --> 00:21:07,666
Keep the change,
Ya filthy animal.
510
00:21:07,733 --> 00:21:09,701
[ gun clatters ]
511
00:21:09,768 --> 00:21:12,537
It's over,
It's finally over.
512
00:21:12,604 --> 00:21:14,106
Yep, it sure is.
513
00:21:14,172 --> 00:21:17,242
Ooh, I should really put some
Neosporin on this bite.
514
00:21:17,309 --> 00:21:18,410
Wait, what did you say?
515
00:21:18,477 --> 00:21:21,513
[ laughs evilly ]
516
00:21:26,284 --> 00:21:27,552
I'm chris hardwick.
517
00:21:27,619 --> 00:21:30,255
Wow, what a 100th episode
Of "The walking dead."
518
00:21:30,322 --> 00:21:32,991
Lori's fate revealed,
The virus unleashed once more,
519
00:21:33,058 --> 00:21:36,094
And how will snoopy factor
Into negan's future plans?
520
00:21:36,161 --> 00:21:38,430
Joining us tonight, "Walking
Dead" sasquatch robert kirkman,
521
00:21:38,497 --> 00:21:39,931
Show runner
Scott m. Gimple,
522
00:21:39,998 --> 00:21:42,267
And shiva the tiger,
Sir fred livingston iii.
523
00:21:42,334 --> 00:21:43,769
-hello!
-thanks, seacrest.
524
00:21:43,835 --> 00:21:45,737
This is probably my favorite
Episode of all-time.
525
00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:47,973
Took 100 tries to get
A unicorn on the show,
526
00:21:48,040 --> 00:21:49,841
But damn,
You pulled it off, gumby.
527
00:21:49,908 --> 00:21:51,877
It's gimple,
And just to clarify,
528
00:21:51,943 --> 00:21:54,346
This wasn't officially
The 100th episode.
529
00:21:54,413 --> 00:21:56,448
Well, the season seven
Finale was episode 99,
530
00:21:56,515 --> 00:21:59,251
Which makes this episode 100
Because math.
531
00:21:59,317 --> 00:22:02,587
No, this was a "Robot chicken"
Special on adult swim.
532
00:22:02,654 --> 00:22:04,322
You drag me
Onto the dead actor couch,
533
00:22:04,389 --> 00:22:06,358
And this episode
Doesn't even fucking count?
534
00:22:06,425 --> 00:22:08,193
-yawr!
-holy lord almighty!
535
00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:09,461
Stop it! Oh, my head!
536
00:22:09,528 --> 00:22:11,930
No, my dick!
Yeah!
Bite that dick!
537
00:22:11,997 --> 00:22:14,933
[ screaming ]
That is
How you bite a dick!
538
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,735
I have 75 shows
To produce!
36926
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
