Original subtitles

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

NARRATOR: In a far-flung galaxy,

light years from Planet Earth,

a crack team of space adventurers

hurtle across the galaxy

on an important mission.

There it is, fellas.

The distant moon of Glendor.

Speaking of which,

- does anyone want a smoothie? - I do.

I thought we were going to Miami Beach.

No, we're going to Glendor.

We have to find the Rhombus Stone.

Great. I guess I'm wearing these for nothing.

There's never a reason to wear those.

It's a powerful energy source

said to contain more power than a thousand suns.

A thousand suns?

Maybe I can still get my tan on.

It's an energy source, not a tanning bed.

And whoever controls that stone,

controls the universe.

We gotta make sure it doesn't fall into the wrong hands.

(LASER GUNS WHOOSHING)

It is I, Calzonius.

Evil galactic overlord.

And you are in my zone.

My Cal Zone.

(LASER GUNS WHOOSHING)

Time for evasive maneuvers.

Hang on tight, everyone. Whoo-hoo!

(GRUNTS)

It's no use. We're still taking heavy fire.

Don't worry. I'm gonna slam on the brakes

and watch 'em fly right by.

(ALL SCREAM)

(ALL GRUNT)

(ALL SCREAM)

(GRUNTS)

Oh, no, my blender was in there.

-(DAFFY GRUNTS) -(BIGFOOT SCREAMS)

Captain's log.

After some amazing flying by yours truly,

we've landed on the distant moon of Glendor.

Our mission, to seek out beaches and sunshine.

We're not searching for a vacation spot.

We're here to find the Rhombus Stone.

Captain's log. The rabbit has become delusional.

I'm gonna have to employ counter measures.

Hiya!

(GRUNTING)

(GROANS) Captain's log. He's got me in an arm bar.

(GRUNTS) Captain's log.

Now he's got me pinned down.

Captain's log. Now he's poking me in the eye! Argh!

(RUSTLING)

Uh, any of you guys hear that?

Stay sharp, crew.

We are definitely not alone on this planet.

Why? It could be a fire-breathing space wombat.

Or a flying vampire space lizard

- Or a-- - Gooba Gooba.

(SCREAMS)

Hey, it's my cousin, Gooba Gooba.

Gooba Gooba?

Look, it's all my cousins.

There's Gooba Gooba, Gooba Gooba...

Hey-hey, Gooba Gooba! It's been a while.

Are all your cousins named Gooba Gooba?

No. That one's Gooo-ba Gooba.

And that one is Gooba Goo-baa.

Right.

ELMER: Argh! BUGS: Ouch!

Ow! Hey! Why, you little twerp!

Wait. That's just how the Gooba Goobas say hello.

Oh, hello!

Gooba!

- How are you? Nice to meet you. - Gooba!

This planet is the best!

Say, can you ask him if they know where the Rhombus Stone is?

Sure. Uh, gooba-gooba, gooba-gooba?

Gooba, gooba, gooba.

They know, but they wanna take us

to their village first for a grand feast.

We don't have time for a--

Yes, we do. I'm starving. Lead the way!

(CHATTERING) Gooba, gooba, gooba...

(CHATTERING) Gooba, gooba, gooba, gooba...

Wow! They're really making us feel at home.

Now they've tied us up.

And now they're roasting us over an open fire.

Open fire!

Oh, gee! I forgot.

When the tribe meets a stranger,

it's a Gooba Gooba custom to eat them.

That's kind of a major detail to forget.

Tell them to let us go.

Uh, gooba, gooba-gooba.

Oh! Gooba-gooba, gooba, gooba, gooba, gooba.

Sorry, but unless you guys are a member of the tribe,

they're still going to eat you.

How do we become a member of the tribe?

One of you must beat them in a traditional tribal dance-off.

We'll dance! We'll dance!

Correction. I'll dance.

I'm gonna wipe the dance floor with these fluff-balls.

- Gooba! - Nice to meet ya!

(UPBEAT DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)

Gooba!

Actually, maybe you should dance.

Gooba!

Gooba.

- Gooba. - Gooba!

(BEATBOXING)

(VOCALIZING) ♪ Gooba gooba gooba... ♪

Uh...

(VOCALIZING) ♪ Gooba-gooba Gooba, gooba... ♪

(CHATTERING EXCITEDLY) Gooba, gooba, gooba...

Okay, Bigfoot,

now ask him where we can find the Rhombus Stone.

Gooba, gooba-gooba?

Gooba!

It's in the scary, creepy cave on the hill.

(THUNDER CRASHES)

(DAFFY SCREAMS)

Will you knock it off?

What? It's a scary cave.

Ugh!

NARRATOR: Will our heroes enter the cave?

Will they find the Rhombus Stone?

Will Daffy stop acting like such a fraidy cat?

Stay tuned to find out.

NARRATOR: And so our heroes

entered the dark and sinister cave

in search of the Rhombus Stone.

Danger lurked behind every corner.

The stench of evil hung in the air.

Every step could lead them to their doom.

All right! We get it!

Bigfoot, are we heading in the right direction?

The Gooba Gooba said the Rhombus stone

is somewhere in this cave

guarded by a giant space monster.

Did you say "giant space monster"?

Yeah. And he's right over there.

(ROARS)

(SCREAMING IN TERROR)

(SCREAMS)

Run! For! Your! Life! (GRUNTS)

You know, I'm beginning to suspect that we're trapped down here.

(MONSTER ROARS)

Stand back. I got this.

(EXCLAIMS) Yeah!

- Ha! -(MONSTER ROARS)

(MONSTER GROWLS)

Ha!

Hey! This monster's filled with wires and gears.

No, I'm not. I'm a real space monster.

I mean, uh, you cut off my tail.

I will get you!

(GRUNTS)

Look at that. It's a goat on stilts.

Uh, pay no attention to the goat on stilts.

I will destroy you!

Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa!

(GRUNTS)

Who are you?

I am the guardian of the Rhombus Stone. That's who.

Turns out the giant space monster

is just a harmless little goat. Ha!

I'll show you harmless.

(GRUNTING) Argh!

Hey, leave him alone.

Oh. You want a piece of me too, old man?

(STRAINING)

Mr. Goat, we're not here to steal the Rhombus Stone,

we're here to protect it.

Ha! I've heard that one before.

(STRAINING)

It's true. They're Gemini Warriors.

Protectors of the galaxy.

Oh! It's over there next to my bowling trophies.

You bowled a perfect game? Very impressive.

All right. Let's get the stone and get out of here.

Actually I will be taking that.

Calzonius.

You have led me right to the Rhombus Stone.

And now, I can take over the universe!

You'll never get away with this.

We'll stop you

even if we have to travel to every corner of the galaxy.

Actually, you are going to be staying right here.

(LAUGHS)

(ALL GRUNT)

He's trapped us inside. We're doomed.

How are we gonna get...

Ahem!

There's a back door in here?

Yeah. I had the cave renovated last year.

I put in a hot tub too.

A hot tub. Don't mind if I do.

We don't have time for that.

We have to save the universe.

First, no tan. And now, no hot tub.

So far, this trip is a real bummer.

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

With the power of the Rhombus Stone,

I will finally control the universe.

GUARD 1: Oh!

GUARD 2: Hey!

Hey!

(BUGLE BLARING)

Gooba!

(GRUNTS)

(EXCLAIMS) What the--

- Gooba! -(GUARD GRUNTING)

(GUARD SCREAMING)

(CHATTERING) Gooba, gooba, gooba...

Fight back, you fools.

They're just harmless teddy bears.

Gooba, gooba, gooba, gooba...

CAL: (SCREAMS) Run away!

(CAL WHIMPERING)

You guys stay here and help the Gooba Goobas.

I'll go get Calzonius.

-(GUARDS SNICKERING) -(GOOBA GOOBA WHIMPERS)

Why don't you two pick on someone your own size?

BOTH: Whoa!

You pick on you and you pick on you!

- GUARDS: Ow! -(GOOBA GOOBA LAUGHS)

Dance, hazmats, dance. (LAUGHS)

(ALL GRUNTING)

Doing fine work, gentlemen.

We got them right where we want them.

(SLURPING)

Hey, hey! Move to the left a bit.

- You're blocking my sun here. -(GUARDS GRUNTING)

Uh, what is that passcode number again?

Is it my birthday?

(ALARM BUZZING)

- Is it my mother's birthday? -(ALARM BUZZING)

My aunt's birthday?

BUGS: It's over, Calzonius.

Give me the Rhombus Stone.

It belongs to me.

(GRUNTS LOUDLY)

It was my aunt's birthday.

Yes! I feel the power.

And soon, you will too.

(STRAINING)

Use the fruit, Bugs, the fruit...

Ah!

(GRUNTS)

(LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

(SCREAMS) My powerful eyes!

(SOBBING LOUDLY)

(GRUNTING) Oh!

(SPACESHIP REVVING)

(CAL SCREAMING)

You did it! You got the Rhombus Stone.

Because he used the fruit.

I thought a tomato was a vegetable.

A tomato is a fruit,

and a vegetable.

Now, let's see if this thing

really has the power of a thousand suns.

Daffy, no!

Well, back to the feast.

(CHEERING LOUDLY)

Gooba Gooba!

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)