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1
00:00:01,710 --> 00:00:02,961
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
2
00:00:20,395 --> 00:00:22,772
PORKY: Many thanks.
Much obliged, ma'am.
3
00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:24,649
-(MUNCHING)
-(RADIO CRACKLES)
4
00:00:24,733 --> 00:00:28,403
CHIEF: Officer Horace.
Officer Horace.
Come in, Horace.
5
00:00:28,486 --> 00:00:30,238
What is it, Chief?
6
00:00:30,321 --> 00:00:32,031
CHIEF: There's
a rogue duck squatting
in the mall fountain.
7
00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:34,242
-Get him out of there.
- You got it, Chief.
8
00:00:34,325 --> 00:00:36,786
-(RADIO CRACKLES)
- Hey, Porky, you think you
could take care of this one?
9
00:00:36,870 --> 00:00:39,581
Uh, but I just started to eat.
10
00:00:39,664 --> 00:00:41,875
Look, Porky,
I'm bigger than you, okay?
11
00:00:41,958 --> 00:00:46,671
And because I'm
bigger than you, I need
more food than you. Capisce?
12
00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:48,298
(STAMMERING)
13
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:50,967
(SIGHS) Sure thing, Horace.
14
00:00:51,050 --> 00:00:54,053
Thanks, Porky.
Hey, you got this, okay?
15
00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:55,889
PORKY: Keep an eye
on my food for me.
16
00:00:55,972 --> 00:00:58,308
Hmm. Mmm-hmm.
17
00:00:58,391 --> 00:01:01,519
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
18
00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:05,023
Move along, everyone.
Nothin' to see here.
19
00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:06,983
Excuse me, Mr. D...
(STAMMERING)
20
00:01:07,066 --> 00:01:10,570
Shh! Do you mind?
My stories are on.
21
00:01:10,653 --> 00:01:14,282
-(SAD MUSIC PLAYING ON TV)
- I'm afraid I'm gonna
have to ask you to leave.
22
00:01:14,365 --> 00:01:16,493
Can it wait
until the commercials?
23
00:01:16,576 --> 00:01:19,287
I think Ronaldo
is about to confess.
24
00:01:19,370 --> 00:01:23,041
- Hey!
- I'm sorry, Mr. Duck,
but you leave me no choice.
25
00:01:23,124 --> 00:01:24,918
(MUSIC STOPS)
26
00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:28,838
Whoo! That ending was
a real shocker. Whoo-hoo!
27
00:01:28,922 --> 00:01:30,590
(GIGGLING) Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
28
00:01:30,673 --> 00:01:33,301
- Get back here!
- Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
29
00:01:33,384 --> 00:01:36,221
- You have to leave now.
- What's the rush?
30
00:01:36,304 --> 00:01:39,349
DAFFY: You gotta stop
and pamper yourself
every once in a while.
31
00:01:39,432 --> 00:01:42,352
Now you just sit there
and I'll make you beautiful.
32
00:01:42,435 --> 00:01:46,356
(GASPS) Looks like
I spoke too soon.
You're perfect.
33
00:01:46,439 --> 00:01:48,358
(MUFFLED)
My face is down here.
34
00:01:48,441 --> 00:01:50,151
Oops, my mistake.
35
00:01:51,736 --> 00:01:54,697
Yeesh! Looks like I've got
my work cut out for me.
36
00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:57,158
Let's see. Gonna need
a lot of foundation.
37
00:01:57,242 --> 00:01:59,369
A little rouge,
some lipstick...
38
00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:01,120
Man, you still look terrible.
39
00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:03,832
Wait a minute.
I'm not left-handed. Whoo-hoo!
40
00:02:03,915 --> 00:02:07,210
Some eyeliner,
bit of mascara, and voila!
41
00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:11,756
Hmm. Well, I tried.
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
42
00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:14,342
(HORACE NEIGHING)
43
00:02:14,425 --> 00:02:17,303
Well, well, well.
What do we have here?
44
00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:21,683
You know, I happen to be
a very important person
around here.
45
00:02:21,766 --> 00:02:26,062
I'd be more than happy
to show you around the place,
if you'd like.
46
00:02:26,145 --> 00:02:29,065
Uh, Horace, it's me. Porky.
47
00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:34,737
This never happened.
You hear me?
48
00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:37,532
Don't just sit there
lookin' beautiful.
Get outta here!
49
00:02:39,492 --> 00:02:42,245
This never happened.
50
00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:44,914
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo!
51
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,625
- Yoo-hoo!
-(GRUNTING) Ahhh!
52
00:02:47,709 --> 00:02:52,255
Oh. Baked honey ham.
Don't mind if I do.
53
00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:55,925
(MACHINE HUMS AND DINGS)
54
00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:01,264
Phew. It was like an oven
in there.
55
00:03:01,347 --> 00:03:04,517
Whoo, you weren't kiddin'.
We've gotta cool your jets.
56
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,022
This oughta do it.
57
00:03:09,898 --> 00:03:11,566
(GRUNTING)
58
00:03:13,526 --> 00:03:16,362
Ew. We need to whip
you back into shape.
59
00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:17,655
Pop a squat.
60
00:03:17,739 --> 00:03:18,990
(GROANS)
61
00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:22,452
This massage is just
what the ducktor ordered.
62
00:03:22,535 --> 00:03:24,495
Let's try the Finnish fold.
63
00:03:24,579 --> 00:03:26,289
(GROANING)
64
00:03:26,372 --> 00:03:28,958
Or maybe some Swedish slaps.
65
00:03:29,042 --> 00:03:30,793
(GRUNTING AND GROANING)
66
00:03:30,877 --> 00:03:32,795
- The Hungarian headlock.
-(WHEEZING)
67
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,048
How about
the Turkish takedown?
68
00:03:35,131 --> 00:03:36,382
(SCREAMS)
69
00:03:36,466 --> 00:03:39,010
- Ooh, I know. The Bronx boot.
-(SHUDDERING)
70
00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:41,346
(SCREAMS AND GRUNTS)
71
00:03:41,429 --> 00:03:42,597
Feeling better?
72
00:03:42,680 --> 00:03:46,142
I'd feel better
if you'd leave.
73
00:03:46,225 --> 00:03:49,312
I don't have time to listen
to you drone on and on.
74
00:03:49,395 --> 00:03:51,814
- Speaking of drones. Whoo-hoo!
-(ENGINE DRONING)
75
00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:52,899
(GRUNTS)
76
00:03:55,526 --> 00:03:59,447
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
77
00:03:59,530 --> 00:04:00,573
Whoo-hoo!
78
00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:02,492
- You're comin' with me.
- No, I'm not.
79
00:04:02,575 --> 00:04:04,243
- What?
- I said, "No, I'm not."
80
00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:05,495
Why not?
81
00:04:05,578 --> 00:04:07,497
- Because you're
coming with me.
-(SCREAMS)
82
00:04:07,580 --> 00:04:09,749
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
83
00:04:09,832 --> 00:04:11,918
- Watch out for the...
- Whoo-hoo!
84
00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:14,796
- Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
-(PORKY SCREAMING)
85
00:04:14,879 --> 00:04:16,756
(SPLASHING)
86
00:04:17,465 --> 00:04:18,549
Whoo-hoo.
87
00:04:20,259 --> 00:04:23,429
- Ah!
- Aha! Got you now.
88
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:27,934
Au contraire.
Now I've got you. Whoo-hoo.
89
00:04:28,017 --> 00:04:31,104
(BABBLING)
90
00:04:31,187 --> 00:04:34,774
-(MUMBLING)
- Hey, you're a natural.
91
00:04:34,857 --> 00:04:36,943
(MUSIC PLAYING)
92
00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:43,533
(BABBLING)
93
00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:46,369
(GROANING)
94
00:04:46,452 --> 00:04:49,038
Time for the big finish.
95
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:54,961
Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
Just do what we do. Whoo-hoo!
96
00:04:55,044 --> 00:04:56,129
-(GROANS)
-(MUSIC PLAYING)
97
00:05:06,347 --> 00:05:08,599
(BABBLING) Huh?
98
00:05:08,683 --> 00:05:10,601
(ALL CHEERING)
99
00:05:11,978 --> 00:05:13,688
Horace, what are you doing?
100
00:05:13,771 --> 00:05:17,066
What can I say?
I have an appreciation
for aquatic dancin'.
101
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:19,569
Enough of this.
We gotta get that...
102
00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:20,903
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
103
00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,947
I wouldn't wander off
too far, gentlemen.
104
00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:25,366
You've got another show
starting in 15 minutes.
105
00:05:25,450 --> 00:05:27,160
-(LAUGHING)
- This is our big break.
106
00:05:28,369 --> 00:05:29,579
These two.
107
00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:32,915
The bigger they are,
the harder they mall.
108
00:05:32,999 --> 00:05:35,501
Get it? (LAUGHS)
109
00:05:35,585 --> 00:05:40,006
This never happened.
(GROANS)
110
00:05:45,803 --> 00:05:49,432
(DRUMS BEATING)
111
00:05:49,515 --> 00:05:51,642
(YELLS AND GRUNTS)
112
00:05:52,977 --> 00:05:55,438
(YELLS AND GRUNTS)
113
00:05:55,521 --> 00:05:59,358
Mama! Oh my!
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
114
00:05:59,442 --> 00:06:02,779
I am Cal,
the greatest gladiator
in all of Rome.
115
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:05,531
- The Colosseum is my zone.
-(SCREAMING)
116
00:06:05,615 --> 00:06:08,117
-(THUDS)
-(CLATTERING)
117
00:06:08,201 --> 00:06:11,329
- My Cal-zone.
-(RUNNING FOOTSTEPS)
118
00:06:11,412 --> 00:06:13,081
(ALL GRUNT)
119
00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:14,874
- Get out of my zone!
-(ALL SCREAMING)
120
00:06:14,957 --> 00:06:16,459
Ahhh! (GRUNTS)
121
00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:18,503
This helmet,
she saved my life.
122
00:06:18,586 --> 00:06:21,756
- Ahhh!
- Boy, these Roman baths
sure are refreshin'.
123
00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:24,133
I feel like
a freshly laundered toga.
124
00:06:24,217 --> 00:06:27,929
What the...
Hey, watch it with that thing.
125
00:06:28,012 --> 00:06:29,597
The impertinence.
126
00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,557
You must be my next opponent.
127
00:06:31,641 --> 00:06:34,602
Opponent? I'm just trying
to walk across the park here.
128
00:06:34,685 --> 00:06:39,482
You are not in a park. You are
in my zone. My Cal-zone!
129
00:06:39,565 --> 00:06:42,777
Actually, the Colosseum
is a common area.
130
00:06:42,860 --> 00:06:47,240
-(DRUM ROLL)
- Emperor, should he stay
or should he go?
131
00:06:51,911 --> 00:06:53,496
(DRUM ROLL STOPS)
132
00:06:54,413 --> 00:06:55,832
He goes. He goes!
133
00:06:55,915 --> 00:06:58,251
-(AUDIENCE CHEERING)
- Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
134
00:06:58,334 --> 00:07:00,002
-(DRUMS BEATING)
- Looks like I can go now, doc.
135
00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:01,838
If you just show me
the way out, I...
136
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:04,257
With pleasure. (GRUNTS)
137
00:07:04,340 --> 00:07:06,467
And he begins his swing.
138
00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:08,469
And it's a grand slam.
139
00:07:08,553 --> 00:07:10,138
(SCREAMS AND GRUNTS)
140
00:07:10,221 --> 00:07:12,348
Of course you knew.
141
00:07:12,431 --> 00:07:15,893
This means ancient Roman war.
142
00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:18,688
-(GRUNTING)
-(YAWNS)
143
00:07:18,771 --> 00:07:20,606
When is that cappuccino break?
144
00:07:20,690 --> 00:07:22,525
-(FANFARE)
- Huh?
145
00:07:22,608 --> 00:07:25,361
I am Bugsis Bunnyus
146
00:07:25,444 --> 00:07:28,990
and I am here
to reclaim my honor!
147
00:07:29,073 --> 00:07:35,121
What? You're back?
No one reenters my Cal-zone.
148
00:07:35,204 --> 00:07:36,998
-(SCREAMS)
-(GRUNTS)
149
00:07:37,081 --> 00:07:39,000
- Ciao, bella.
-(GRUNTS)
150
00:07:39,083 --> 00:07:42,545
- Here. You dropped this.
-Grazie, signore.
151
00:07:42,628 --> 00:07:45,381
Give it another shot.
And try to focus this time.
152
00:07:45,464 --> 00:07:47,508
-(GRUNTS)
- Oh, no, no, no.
153
00:07:47,592 --> 00:07:49,552
Put your weight
into your back foot
154
00:07:49,635 --> 00:07:52,138
and really
swing through it this time.
155
00:07:52,221 --> 00:07:54,432
Grazie. (GRUNTS)
156
00:07:54,515 --> 00:07:56,142
- That's better.
- Ouch.
157
00:07:56,225 --> 00:07:57,685
I think you're gettin' it.
158
00:07:57,768 --> 00:08:00,104
(GRUNTS) Time out. Time out.
159
00:08:00,188 --> 00:08:03,107
I think I need a riposo.
160
00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:04,901
Well, why didn't you say so?
161
00:08:04,984 --> 00:08:07,737
I got a bed set up
for you right here.
162
00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:10,781
- Now, just close your eyes
and rest your noodle.
- Mmm.
163
00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:13,409
And off to dream land
you'll go.
164
00:08:13,492 --> 00:08:15,328
Aw, he's already asleep.
165
00:08:15,411 --> 00:08:17,914
Didn't even wait
for his lullaby.
166
00:08:17,997 --> 00:08:21,042
(SCREAMS AND GRUNTS)
167
00:08:21,125 --> 00:08:25,504
Where is that rabbit?
(MUMBLING IN ITALIAN)
168
00:08:25,588 --> 00:08:26,964
- BUGS: There he is.
- Huh?
169
00:08:27,048 --> 00:08:30,009
Our next contestant
on Rome's Got Talent,
170
00:08:30,092 --> 00:08:33,095
-the talent show where
the next star of ancient Rome
-(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
171
00:08:33,179 --> 00:08:36,349
-is just waiting
to be discovered.
-(GRUNTS)
172
00:08:36,432 --> 00:08:38,100
(CROWD CHEERING)
173
00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:41,604
Yeah! Rome's Got Talent.
I love this show.
174
00:08:41,687 --> 00:08:44,482
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
He goes. He goes!
175
00:08:44,565 --> 00:08:45,942
Wait, wait. Not yet.
176
00:08:46,025 --> 00:08:48,277
- But I have no talent.
- Oh, come on, doc.
177
00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:51,948
Everyone's got talent.
All's you gotta do
is sing and dance.
178
00:08:52,031 --> 00:08:57,703
Then prepare yourselves for
singing at a higher Cal-iber.
179
00:08:57,787 --> 00:09:00,081
(CROWD BOOING)
180
00:09:01,874 --> 00:09:03,000
(CLEARS THROAT)
181
00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:05,753
♪ I like my pasta
182
00:09:05,836 --> 00:09:08,464
♪ Mostly linguini
183
00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,841
♪ Serve it al dente
184
00:09:10,925 --> 00:09:13,427
♪ Please make it creamy ♪
185
00:09:13,511 --> 00:09:17,181
- See, you're a natural.
Now try some dancing.
-(TRUCK REVERSING)
186
00:09:17,265 --> 00:09:21,352
(SHRIEKS)
♪ I'm getting pinched
by a bunch of crabs
187
00:09:21,435 --> 00:09:23,229
Ouch!
♪ Don't go down there
188
00:09:23,312 --> 00:09:25,815
(YELPS)
♪ They went down there
(YELPS)
189
00:09:25,898 --> 00:09:27,024
♪ Oh, no
190
00:09:27,108 --> 00:09:29,527
♪ These crabs
are getting everywhere
191
00:09:29,610 --> 00:09:32,446
♪ They're even
in my derriere ♪
192
00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,865
- Boy, he really hits
the high notes.
-(GRUNTS)
193
00:09:34,949 --> 00:09:36,867
(LAUGHING)
194
00:09:36,951 --> 00:09:38,119
(GRUNTS)
195
00:09:38,202 --> 00:09:41,289
Hey, look who's back.
Mr. Crabby Pants.
196
00:09:41,372 --> 00:09:43,040
(GROWLS AND YELPS)
197
00:09:43,124 --> 00:09:45,793
I will get that coniglio.
198
00:09:45,876 --> 00:09:48,629
Time to get this pasta fazool
back to Sorrento.
199
00:09:48,713 --> 00:09:50,548
- Where do you think
you're going?
- Hi-yah!
200
00:09:50,631 --> 00:09:52,842
-(HORSE WHINNYING)
- Whoa!
201
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:54,427
-(YELLING)
-(BUGS EXCLAIMING)
202
00:09:54,969 --> 00:09:55,970
Whoa!
203
00:09:57,847 --> 00:09:59,765
-(GRUNTS)
- Whoa!
204
00:10:01,225 --> 00:10:02,977
-(GRUNTS)
-(WATER RUSHING)
205
00:10:03,060 --> 00:10:06,230
That's not good. (YELLS)
206
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,985
♪ There's a place in Rome
(SCATTING)
207
00:10:11,068 --> 00:10:13,487
♪ All the boys call home
(SCATTING)
208
00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:15,781
♪ There's a hole in the wall
(SCATTING)
209
00:10:15,865 --> 00:10:18,034
-♪ Where you can Colosseum ♪
-(WOOD GROANING)
210
00:10:22,121 --> 00:10:25,833
Time for you
to meet your maker.
(YELLS)
211
00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:28,044
- Yikes!
-(CATAPULT FIRING)
212
00:10:28,127 --> 00:10:30,212
(YELLING)
213
00:10:31,464 --> 00:10:34,383
- Incoming!
-(SCREAMS)
214
00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:37,303
Stop! You're destroying
the Colosseum!
215
00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:40,890
(GRUNTS AND GROANS)
216
00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:44,560
And I love it!
217
00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:47,772
-(GIGGLING) Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
-(GRUNTS AND SCREAMS)
218
00:10:49,690 --> 00:10:50,858
(GRUNTS)
219
00:10:50,941 --> 00:10:53,277
(GIGGLING) Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
220
00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:55,279
I goes! I goes!
221
00:10:57,031 --> 00:10:58,657
Rome wasn't built in a day...
222
00:10:58,741 --> 00:11:00,910
But it sure was
destroyed in one.
223
00:11:00,993 --> 00:11:03,621
(GIGGLING) Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo! Whoo-hoo!
224
00:11:03,704 --> 00:11:05,539
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo.
16572
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