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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:37,135 --> 00:00:38,735 Well, that was an interesting walk. 2 00:00:38,802 --> 00:00:41,505 Yes. Uh, listen, I'd like to apologize 3 00:00:41,572 --> 00:00:43,040 for my skirmish with cupcake, 4 00:00:43,107 --> 00:00:45,275 but in my defense, 5 00:00:45,343 --> 00:00:47,727 I did see the tennis ball first. 6 00:00:49,697 --> 00:00:52,048 Well, hopefully you two can start fresh next time. 7 00:00:52,116 --> 00:00:53,983 Well, that's up to him. 8 00:00:54,051 --> 00:00:56,202 Oh, I have to push back our walk on Thursday. 9 00:00:56,270 --> 00:00:57,403 I'm going to sears to get a picture 10 00:00:57,471 --> 00:00:59,505 of me and the dogs for my Christmas card. 11 00:00:59,573 --> 00:01:01,691 Sears? I can do it right here. 12 00:01:01,759 --> 00:01:02,476 Well, I kind of like sears 13 00:01:02,627 --> 00:01:03,994 'cause they give you the little mini ones- 14 00:01:04,062 --> 00:01:06,412 come on. It'll be my holiday gift to you. 15 00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:07,764 Well, I already have an appointment. 16 00:01:07,832 --> 00:01:09,082 But it's my gift to you. 17 00:01:09,150 --> 00:01:10,017 And I appreciate that- 18 00:01:10,084 --> 00:01:11,301 it's my gift! Ok. Ok. 19 00:01:13,204 --> 00:01:14,620 Ohh! 20 00:01:14,689 --> 00:01:16,990 There's my man! 21 00:01:17,058 --> 00:01:18,291 Ooh! 22 00:01:18,358 --> 00:01:20,226 It's so good to have you home! 23 00:01:20,294 --> 00:01:22,078 All right. Settle down. 24 00:01:22,146 --> 00:01:23,596 Just me, not the sparkletts guy. 25 00:01:25,199 --> 00:01:26,616 I'm sorry. Just bouncing off the walls here. 26 00:01:26,684 --> 00:01:27,617 Really? 27 00:01:27,685 --> 00:01:28,718 Yeah, when you don't have a job, 28 00:01:28,786 --> 00:01:30,253 you get up, 29 00:01:30,321 --> 00:01:31,721 you throw on your sweats, 30 00:01:31,789 --> 00:01:33,156 you eat something, you sit on the couch, 31 00:01:33,224 --> 00:01:35,858 and before you know it, it's time for bed. 32 00:01:35,926 --> 00:01:38,745 That is word for word one of my top dreams. 33 00:01:40,731 --> 00:01:42,649 Come on, honey, entertain me, entertain me. 34 00:01:42,717 --> 00:01:44,183 All right, I'd like to start off 35 00:01:44,251 --> 00:01:47,721 with a piece called "having doritos." 36 00:01:47,788 --> 00:01:49,706 Seriously, honey, 37 00:01:49,774 --> 00:01:51,408 say one of those funny things you say. 38 00:01:51,475 --> 00:01:52,409 What do ya got? 39 00:01:54,679 --> 00:01:56,513 Uh... 40 00:01:56,581 --> 00:01:59,249 Arr, rahr, rahr! 41 00:01:59,317 --> 00:02:03,920 Rahr! 42 00:02:05,172 --> 00:02:08,257 Ok, I remember you being a lot more interesting. 43 00:02:08,325 --> 00:02:09,943 Look, just give me 2 minutes, all right? 44 00:02:10,011 --> 00:02:11,044 Why don't you read a magazine or something? 45 00:02:11,112 --> 00:02:13,512 I read every magazine in the house already. 46 00:02:13,580 --> 00:02:14,347 Well, here you go, 47 00:02:14,415 --> 00:02:15,865 read my company newsletter, 48 00:02:15,933 --> 00:02:18,385 I.P. Yes. Go to town. 49 00:02:20,020 --> 00:02:22,205 "Snap, crackle, and pop: 50 00:02:22,273 --> 00:02:25,708 I.P.S. Switches bubble wrap suppliers." 51 00:02:29,247 --> 00:02:30,863 I'm actually gonna read this. 52 00:02:31,882 --> 00:02:33,433 Kids, I think we should nail down a date 53 00:02:33,500 --> 00:02:35,435 for our Christmas card photo shoot. 54 00:02:35,502 --> 00:02:37,303 And as far as wardrobe goes, 55 00:02:37,371 --> 00:02:41,608 I'm thinkin' everyone in denim shirts and jeans. 56 00:02:41,676 --> 00:02:43,743 And I'm thinking no picture and you go downstairs 57 00:02:43,811 --> 00:02:46,012 and get last night's broccoli out of your teeth. 58 00:02:47,632 --> 00:02:49,065 Come on, darling, what do you say? 59 00:02:49,133 --> 00:02:52,219 Let's show a little father-daughter holiday spirit. 60 00:02:52,286 --> 00:02:53,520 Who knows how many christmases 61 00:02:53,588 --> 00:02:55,021 we have left together? 62 00:02:55,089 --> 00:02:56,423 Ohh. 63 00:02:56,491 --> 00:02:58,291 Maybe next year, daddy, ok? 64 00:02:58,359 --> 00:02:59,459 Fine. 65 00:02:59,527 --> 00:03:03,079 I wanna wish you both a merry Christmas in hell! 66 00:03:05,083 --> 00:03:06,966 Oh, my God, look at this. 67 00:03:07,034 --> 00:03:09,469 4 doritos got baked together. 68 00:03:15,709 --> 00:03:18,512 I don't know whether to eat it or donate it to science. 69 00:03:20,464 --> 00:03:23,983 Huh. 70 00:03:24,051 --> 00:03:24,984 What? 71 00:03:25,052 --> 00:03:27,220 Your depot is hiring payroll assistants 72 00:03:27,288 --> 00:03:30,157 to handle the extra holiday load. 73 00:03:30,224 --> 00:03:32,225 They need people who can type and do payroll. 74 00:03:32,293 --> 00:03:33,326 I've done both. 75 00:03:35,630 --> 00:03:36,730 I should apply for this, right? 76 00:03:36,797 --> 00:03:37,998 No, I don't know. 77 00:03:38,065 --> 00:03:39,665 It would be so great to get out of the house 78 00:03:39,733 --> 00:03:41,784 during the day and make a little money. 79 00:03:41,852 --> 00:03:43,637 You know? And I'd feel like I was part of the world again. 80 00:03:43,704 --> 00:03:45,839 I'm gonna go e-mail my r�sum� right now. 81 00:03:45,906 --> 00:03:47,657 Oh. If it's cool with you, 82 00:03:47,725 --> 00:03:49,893 because I would be invading on your turf, you know? 83 00:03:49,961 --> 00:03:51,094 What? Is that all right? 84 00:03:51,162 --> 00:03:52,112 Yeah? 85 00:03:53,764 --> 00:03:56,032 Yeah! 86 00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:58,234 Great! Thanks, baby! Oh, yeah! 87 00:04:00,054 --> 00:04:02,288 No! 88 00:04:07,295 --> 00:04:08,344 So she's standing on the curb, 89 00:04:08,412 --> 00:04:10,463 and I'm gettin' her packages out of the truck, 90 00:04:10,531 --> 00:04:12,331 when out of nowhere this car flies by, 91 00:04:12,399 --> 00:04:13,600 hits this huge puddle, 92 00:04:13,667 --> 00:04:14,734 and bam! 93 00:04:14,802 --> 00:04:16,669 We're in the middle of a wet t-shirt contest. 94 00:04:18,873 --> 00:04:20,490 Me against her. 95 00:04:20,558 --> 00:04:23,059 She's winning, but I'm holding my own. 96 00:04:23,928 --> 00:04:25,194 So, anyway, she's just standing there, 97 00:04:25,262 --> 00:04:27,447 and she's got some grade-a sweet potatoes. 98 00:04:27,515 --> 00:04:28,448 You know what I'm saying? 99 00:04:28,516 --> 00:04:30,483 So what she does is- guess who? 100 00:04:30,551 --> 00:04:33,186 Hey! 101 00:04:33,254 --> 00:04:34,254 Hi, honey. 102 00:04:34,321 --> 00:04:35,255 What are you guys talking about? 103 00:04:35,322 --> 00:04:36,923 I heard sweet potatoes. 104 00:04:36,990 --> 00:04:38,357 Uh, yeah. 105 00:04:38,425 --> 00:04:40,210 We were thinking about gettin' 'em 106 00:04:40,277 --> 00:04:42,378 for the vending machine. 107 00:04:43,864 --> 00:04:45,564 Actually, I was just, uh, 108 00:04:45,632 --> 00:04:49,168 telling a story about this female person 109 00:04:49,236 --> 00:04:51,037 on my route. Sorry. 110 00:04:51,105 --> 00:04:53,072 Oh, that's ok. I know what guys talk about. 111 00:04:53,140 --> 00:04:54,673 Keep goin' like I wasn't even here. 112 00:04:54,741 --> 00:04:56,009 Was she hot? 113 00:04:57,644 --> 00:05:00,313 That's ok. Oh, come on! 114 00:05:00,381 --> 00:05:01,514 All right, well, uh, 115 00:05:01,581 --> 00:05:03,983 this w-woman got splashed by a car 116 00:05:04,051 --> 00:05:06,819 and her-her shirt kind of got wet. 117 00:05:06,887 --> 00:05:10,523 That's where the previously mentioned sweet potatoes come in. 118 00:05:11,808 --> 00:05:13,042 So I was like, you know, 119 00:05:13,110 --> 00:05:15,745 "take your package. I'm not here for the show, lady. 120 00:05:15,812 --> 00:05:16,979 "I don't know what crap you're tryin' to pull, 121 00:05:17,047 --> 00:05:18,047 but I love my wife." 122 00:05:18,115 --> 00:05:19,616 You know what I'm sayin'? 123 00:05:19,683 --> 00:05:21,050 God. 124 00:05:22,620 --> 00:05:23,886 Good one, honey. 125 00:05:23,954 --> 00:05:25,554 All right, snack time. 126 00:05:25,622 --> 00:05:27,556 Honey, can I tell you how good it feels 127 00:05:27,624 --> 00:05:28,824 to be back at work? 128 00:05:28,892 --> 00:05:30,243 I already have a best friend upstairs 129 00:05:30,311 --> 00:05:33,079 and a girl we both hate. 130 00:05:33,147 --> 00:05:34,230 Good for you. Yeah. 131 00:05:34,297 --> 00:05:35,431 So, what are you gonna get? 132 00:05:35,499 --> 00:05:37,667 Eh, I'm not sure yet. 133 00:05:37,735 --> 00:05:38,401 Hey, how 'bout this? 134 00:05:38,468 --> 00:05:39,486 You pick the letter. 135 00:05:39,553 --> 00:05:40,553 I pick the number. 136 00:05:40,621 --> 00:05:41,988 Live dangerously. 137 00:05:42,055 --> 00:05:43,990 Mmm, I don't think so. 138 00:05:44,057 --> 00:05:46,892 I can't risk ending up with a comb for lunch. 139 00:05:48,312 --> 00:05:49,979 I think I'm goin' with fritos. 140 00:05:50,047 --> 00:05:51,647 Oh, don't get the fritos. Get the cheetos. 141 00:05:51,715 --> 00:05:52,848 I'm in the mood for those. 142 00:05:52,916 --> 00:05:54,617 Uh, well, you know, for 70 cents, 143 00:05:54,684 --> 00:05:57,120 you can get your very own bag. 144 00:05:57,187 --> 00:05:59,172 I know, but I only want a few. 145 00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:01,141 Come on, j-6, j-6, j-6, j-6, j-6, j-6- 146 00:06:01,208 --> 00:06:02,642 o- o-ok. 147 00:06:02,710 --> 00:06:04,094 J-6. Yeah! 148 00:06:11,401 --> 00:06:13,402 How's it goin', stud? 149 00:06:18,508 --> 00:06:20,009 Carrie? 150 00:06:20,077 --> 00:06:22,579 Hi, honey! 151 00:06:22,646 --> 00:06:25,281 What are you doin' on the c.B.? 152 00:06:25,348 --> 00:06:27,884 Wanda's teachin' me how. Right, Wanda? 153 00:06:27,952 --> 00:06:30,319 That's right, Doug. 154 00:06:31,505 --> 00:06:32,839 Well... 155 00:06:32,906 --> 00:06:35,442 We're all here, then. 156 00:06:35,509 --> 00:06:38,511 So, what's goin' on? 157 00:06:38,579 --> 00:06:39,612 Uh... 158 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:42,082 Just doin' my route. 159 00:06:42,149 --> 00:06:43,616 Oh, you say "rowt"? I say "root." 160 00:06:44,986 --> 00:06:46,486 And yet we still make it work. 161 00:06:46,553 --> 00:06:48,188 Ok. Gotta wrap this up. 162 00:06:48,255 --> 00:06:49,972 Got a package thing to do. 163 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:52,993 Ok. Bye, honey! 164 00:06:53,060 --> 00:06:54,194 Bye. Oh, wait! 165 00:06:54,261 --> 00:06:55,595 Say good-bye to Wanda. 166 00:06:57,965 --> 00:06:59,866 Bye, Wanda. 167 00:06:59,933 --> 00:07:01,952 Bye, Doug. 168 00:07:06,223 --> 00:07:09,258 Ok, I need hershey in a little tighter. 169 00:07:09,326 --> 00:07:10,577 Cupcake, 170 00:07:10,644 --> 00:07:11,877 quit the funny business. 171 00:07:11,945 --> 00:07:14,780 This is a family picture. 172 00:07:14,848 --> 00:07:16,316 And that's it. Now, hold it. 173 00:07:26,977 --> 00:07:28,912 Now, just wait for the flash. 174 00:07:28,979 --> 00:07:30,146 Arthur, 175 00:07:30,213 --> 00:07:30,963 I hadn't planned on you 176 00:07:31,115 --> 00:07:32,648 actually being in the photo. 177 00:07:32,716 --> 00:07:35,385 Why not? It's a picture of everyone you walk. 178 00:07:35,452 --> 00:07:37,887 Well. Yeah, but I'm sending these to my clients, 179 00:07:37,954 --> 00:07:39,188 and I'm not sure they would understand 180 00:07:39,256 --> 00:07:42,558 that I walk a human being. 181 00:07:42,626 --> 00:07:44,377 When they see your name on the list, 182 00:07:44,445 --> 00:07:47,247 I tell them you're a schnauzer. 183 00:07:47,314 --> 00:07:48,865 Just smile. 184 00:07:48,932 --> 00:07:49,865 Arthur, I don't think I really wanna do- 185 00:07:49,933 --> 00:07:51,434 do it or you're fired! 186 00:07:51,502 --> 00:07:53,135 Now smile. 187 00:07:54,672 --> 00:07:55,605 Only 80 more seconds. 188 00:07:55,673 --> 00:07:57,206 Ok. I'm going to sears. 189 00:07:57,274 --> 00:07:58,374 Fine, but if you're so worried 190 00:07:58,442 --> 00:07:59,842 about your picture being ruined, 191 00:07:59,910 --> 00:08:01,110 I'd worry about him! 192 00:08:01,178 --> 00:08:02,061 Buster? 193 00:08:02,212 --> 00:08:04,047 Something that ugly doesn't deserve a name. 194 00:08:09,536 --> 00:08:12,322 Are you sure northern boulevard's the best way to go? 195 00:08:12,389 --> 00:08:13,889 There's so many lights. 196 00:08:13,957 --> 00:08:16,091 I think we should cut through the waldbaum's 197 00:08:16,159 --> 00:08:17,427 and go through the neighborhood. 198 00:08:17,494 --> 00:08:18,661 You know? And then we'd avoid all that. 199 00:08:18,729 --> 00:08:20,930 Let's try that tomorrow. 200 00:08:24,969 --> 00:08:26,118 Okeydoke. 201 00:08:29,473 --> 00:08:31,007 Ohh! 202 00:08:31,074 --> 00:08:32,642 Ahh. 203 00:08:32,710 --> 00:08:34,911 I am beat. I'm gonna head upstairs to bed. 204 00:08:34,979 --> 00:08:36,279 Yeah, me, too. 205 00:08:39,716 --> 00:08:41,467 You know what? Actually, I'm gonna stay down 206 00:08:41,534 --> 00:08:42,969 and actually watch a little tele-vis-i-on 207 00:08:43,036 --> 00:08:44,270 for a while. 208 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:48,141 Ok, baby. Ok. 209 00:09:10,964 --> 00:09:12,498 Oh, is that Patrick Swayze? 210 00:10:02,498 --> 00:10:03,498 Hey, man. 211 00:10:03,566 --> 00:10:04,499 Have you seen Carrie? 212 00:10:04,567 --> 00:10:05,766 No. 213 00:10:05,834 --> 00:10:08,419 Thank God! 214 00:10:08,487 --> 00:10:10,188 I gotta hit the men's room where I can grab 20 minutes alone 215 00:10:10,255 --> 00:10:11,690 before we drive home tonight. 216 00:10:11,757 --> 00:10:12,907 Yeah, about all that time 217 00:10:12,974 --> 00:10:16,160 you're spending in the bathroom... 218 00:10:16,228 --> 00:10:17,762 The other drivers are getting a little creeped out 219 00:10:17,830 --> 00:10:20,765 walking in and finding you in that folding chair by the urinals. 220 00:10:23,051 --> 00:10:24,853 I'm sorry, but it's the only way I can escape her. 221 00:10:24,920 --> 00:10:28,006 She's everywhere! 222 00:10:28,074 --> 00:10:28,907 Doug? 223 00:10:28,974 --> 00:10:30,391 Oh, my God! Cover for me! 224 00:10:35,915 --> 00:10:36,847 Hey. Hey. 225 00:10:36,916 --> 00:10:37,949 You see the big guy? 226 00:10:38,017 --> 00:10:39,750 Uh, I-i think he's still out on his route. 227 00:10:40,769 --> 00:10:42,287 But his truck's right there. 228 00:10:42,354 --> 00:10:45,656 Oh, he-he must be delivering on foot, then. 229 00:10:46,575 --> 00:10:47,591 You guys do that? 230 00:10:47,659 --> 00:10:50,161 Uh, we like to mix it up. 231 00:10:51,413 --> 00:10:52,880 Uh, that's my snack. See you later. 232 00:10:54,082 --> 00:10:55,082 Hey, that's my lean pocket. 233 00:10:55,150 --> 00:10:57,318 No, it's not. Yes, it is. 234 00:10:57,385 --> 00:10:58,853 I need to do this. 235 00:11:37,326 --> 00:11:38,459 Aah! 236 00:11:39,878 --> 00:11:41,379 Hey, baby. Hey! 237 00:11:41,447 --> 00:11:42,880 Calm down. It's just me. 238 00:11:42,948 --> 00:11:44,182 I know. What's up? What's goin' on? 239 00:11:44,249 --> 00:11:46,451 Oh, I was just wondering if you can store some stuff 240 00:11:46,518 --> 00:11:47,785 in your locker for me. 241 00:11:47,853 --> 00:11:49,787 Like what? Oh, just my sweater 242 00:11:49,855 --> 00:11:52,690 and some of my lady products 243 00:11:52,757 --> 00:11:55,159 and a picture of me 244 00:11:55,227 --> 00:11:58,062 to remember me when I'm not here. 245 00:11:58,130 --> 00:12:01,098 And when will that be?! 246 00:12:01,166 --> 00:12:02,750 What? 247 00:12:02,817 --> 00:12:04,401 I'm sorry. It's just... 248 00:12:04,469 --> 00:12:06,070 Every second of every day, 249 00:12:06,138 --> 00:12:08,572 you know? Driving together, calling me in the truck. 250 00:12:08,641 --> 00:12:11,109 All night with me, you, and Patrick Swayze. 251 00:12:11,176 --> 00:12:13,277 I can't take it anymore! 252 00:12:13,345 --> 00:12:16,181 All right, look, Doug, maybe I went a little overboard here, ok? 253 00:12:16,248 --> 00:12:17,782 Maybe I called you a little too much 254 00:12:17,849 --> 00:12:18,916 on your little radio there, 255 00:12:18,984 --> 00:12:20,818 but I'm only gonna be here for 2 weeks! 256 00:12:20,886 --> 00:12:22,587 You couldn't take it for 2 weeks? 257 00:12:22,655 --> 00:12:23,721 I was surprised myself! 258 00:12:23,789 --> 00:12:25,523 You know? But 2 weeks can seem pretty long! 259 00:12:25,591 --> 00:12:27,458 You know, like, if you're on jury duty 260 00:12:27,526 --> 00:12:29,927 or trapped in a mine! 261 00:12:29,995 --> 00:12:31,595 Oh! Ok, so working with me 262 00:12:31,663 --> 00:12:33,931 is like being trapped in a mine. 263 00:12:33,999 --> 00:12:35,432 Ok, well, I- 264 00:12:35,500 --> 00:12:36,467 you know what, Doug? 265 00:12:36,534 --> 00:12:39,270 I am so sorry that my very presence here 266 00:12:39,338 --> 00:12:41,105 has been so awful for you. 267 00:12:42,057 --> 00:12:43,374 You know what? It's really funny, 268 00:12:43,441 --> 00:12:45,510 because for me, 269 00:12:45,577 --> 00:12:47,045 I love spending this time together. 270 00:12:47,112 --> 00:12:50,548 I- I love being here with you. You know? 271 00:12:50,615 --> 00:12:52,216 I mean... 272 00:12:52,284 --> 00:12:54,752 Watching you work has actually been a turn-on for me, 273 00:12:54,819 --> 00:12:56,320 if you could believe that. 274 00:13:04,129 --> 00:13:05,629 Really? 275 00:13:05,697 --> 00:13:08,032 Yeah. You know, watching you lift all those heavy boxes 276 00:13:08,100 --> 00:13:11,802 and gettin' sweaty and workin' the forklift. 277 00:13:11,870 --> 00:13:14,071 I've never seen you at work, you know? 278 00:13:14,139 --> 00:13:15,973 You're good at what you do. It's sexy. 279 00:13:19,011 --> 00:13:20,845 It is? 280 00:13:20,913 --> 00:13:23,064 Yeah, but you hate me, so... 281 00:13:23,132 --> 00:13:24,132 What's the point? 282 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:26,367 I- 283 00:13:26,435 --> 00:13:27,669 I feel like an idiot now. 284 00:13:27,736 --> 00:13:29,520 Well, you should. 285 00:13:29,588 --> 00:13:31,139 Look, I'm-I'm sorry. 286 00:13:31,206 --> 00:13:33,674 You know I love you. I just- 287 00:13:33,742 --> 00:13:35,876 I just got carried away. 288 00:13:41,283 --> 00:13:43,684 So you like the forklift, huh? 289 00:13:45,354 --> 00:13:46,654 Yeah. 290 00:13:46,722 --> 00:13:49,724 Especially when you raise and swivel at the same time. 291 00:13:49,791 --> 00:13:52,126 You know, that breaks every safety code, but... 292 00:13:52,194 --> 00:13:53,862 It's my signature move. 293 00:13:57,849 --> 00:14:00,351 Do you, uh... 294 00:14:00,418 --> 00:14:02,586 Like it when I do this here? 295 00:14:02,654 --> 00:14:04,421 Do you like that, right here? Huh? 296 00:14:11,747 --> 00:14:12,413 We get it, Doug. Yeah. 297 00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:14,865 Give it a rest now. 298 00:14:14,933 --> 00:14:16,634 How 'bout this stuff here? 299 00:14:19,004 --> 00:14:20,504 Ohh! 300 00:14:20,572 --> 00:14:23,308 Bubbles no match for me! 301 00:14:26,661 --> 00:14:27,945 Look, I'm- 302 00:14:28,013 --> 00:14:30,548 I'm really sorry. Ok? 303 00:14:30,616 --> 00:14:31,549 Ok. 304 00:14:45,764 --> 00:14:47,882 Have a good day at work, tiger. 305 00:14:47,950 --> 00:14:50,484 Mmm. I hate to see you go, 306 00:14:50,552 --> 00:14:52,719 but I love to watch you leave. 307 00:14:55,540 --> 00:14:56,957 What's up with you two now? 308 00:14:57,025 --> 00:14:59,360 Oh, just found out there's a couple of perks 309 00:14:59,428 --> 00:15:01,395 to havin' your wife around at work. 310 00:15:01,463 --> 00:15:02,530 What do you mean? 311 00:15:02,597 --> 00:15:04,515 Mmm. I don't like to have sex 312 00:15:04,583 --> 00:15:06,317 in a truck and tell. 313 00:15:07,952 --> 00:15:10,555 Oh, wait. I guess I do. 314 00:15:10,622 --> 00:15:13,691 Nice. Yahtzee! 315 00:15:15,460 --> 00:15:16,227 Doug and Carrie, 316 00:15:16,295 --> 00:15:17,812 back of his truck. 317 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:22,049 Turnin' this place into I.P. "Oh, yes." 318 00:15:23,218 --> 00:15:24,652 That's the story, Duke. 319 00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:27,655 And by the way, he punched out after. 320 00:15:27,723 --> 00:15:29,490 Rockin' on the clock. 321 00:15:29,558 --> 00:15:32,126 Now, that's the way to do it. 322 00:15:32,193 --> 00:15:34,061 I heard it was surprisingly tender. 323 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:36,681 I think it's pretty inappropriate. 324 00:15:36,749 --> 00:15:37,682 Aren't they married? 325 00:15:37,750 --> 00:15:39,684 Yeah. Still, in a truck? 326 00:15:39,752 --> 00:15:41,318 Yeah, guess you're right. 327 00:15:41,387 --> 00:15:43,287 Why are temps always so slutty? 328 00:15:59,819 --> 00:16:00,919 Spence, my good man! 329 00:16:00,988 --> 00:16:03,722 Yeah, I'm here. Um... 330 00:16:03,790 --> 00:16:06,909 Why did you want me to wear a green turtleneck? 331 00:16:06,976 --> 00:16:09,745 For our Christmas card, of course. 332 00:16:09,813 --> 00:16:10,979 Come again? 333 00:16:11,047 --> 00:16:12,047 A simple snapshot. 334 00:16:12,115 --> 00:16:14,383 You offer me these chocolate chip cookies, 335 00:16:14,451 --> 00:16:17,703 and I react with delight, thusly: 336 00:16:17,770 --> 00:16:19,271 Hey! 337 00:16:20,823 --> 00:16:21,941 What- 338 00:16:22,008 --> 00:16:23,976 what exactly is our relationship 339 00:16:24,043 --> 00:16:26,979 that we're sending out a Christmas card together? 340 00:16:27,046 --> 00:16:28,347 Buddies, confidants, 341 00:16:28,414 --> 00:16:30,633 2 Randy gents about town. 342 00:16:30,700 --> 00:16:32,901 Don't you think that seems... 343 00:16:32,969 --> 00:16:35,688 Joyous? Inspired? 344 00:16:35,755 --> 00:16:37,489 Gay. 345 00:16:37,557 --> 00:16:40,309 Christmas is no time for bigotry! 346 00:16:40,377 --> 00:16:41,794 I'm not homophobic! 347 00:16:41,862 --> 00:16:45,414 I just don't wanna be on a card with you. 348 00:16:45,482 --> 00:16:46,715 These aren't even real! 349 00:16:46,783 --> 00:16:48,200 Of course not. They're prop cookies. 350 00:16:48,268 --> 00:16:50,886 Real cookies photograph like buttons, idiot! 351 00:16:50,954 --> 00:16:52,154 Merry Christmas, Arthur. 352 00:16:52,222 --> 00:16:53,639 Good! Leave, then. 353 00:16:53,707 --> 00:16:55,591 Now I don't have to explain to people 354 00:16:55,658 --> 00:16:57,859 how I befriended a lawn dwarf! 355 00:17:01,014 --> 00:17:02,615 Back of the truck. Now. 356 00:17:09,188 --> 00:17:10,239 Ahh. 357 00:17:10,307 --> 00:17:12,208 Comin' back for some more Dougie lovin', huh? 358 00:17:12,275 --> 00:17:14,910 I guess once you pop, you can't stop. 359 00:17:14,978 --> 00:17:16,212 Ow! 360 00:17:16,279 --> 00:17:18,314 Tough love. I'm in. 361 00:17:18,381 --> 00:17:21,483 I can't believe you told everyone! 362 00:17:21,551 --> 00:17:22,634 What are you talkin' about? 363 00:17:22,702 --> 00:17:24,919 What am I talking about? About what we did here. 364 00:17:24,987 --> 00:17:26,104 Oh, and you didn't tell anyone? 365 00:17:26,172 --> 00:17:27,823 Oh, yeah, I just couldn't wait to tell everyone 366 00:17:27,891 --> 00:17:30,159 how chunky nailed me on bubble wrap. 367 00:17:30,226 --> 00:17:31,726 You see, I knew this was wrong 368 00:17:31,795 --> 00:17:33,628 for a husband and wife to work together! 369 00:17:33,696 --> 00:17:35,831 Well, you know what, you don't have to worry about that anymore, 370 00:17:35,899 --> 00:17:37,833 because for the rest of my time here, 371 00:17:37,901 --> 00:17:39,301 we are not husband and wife, ok? 372 00:17:39,368 --> 00:17:41,036 We are separate employees 373 00:17:41,104 --> 00:17:42,905 with separate lives. 374 00:17:42,972 --> 00:17:44,105 Works for me! 375 00:17:44,173 --> 00:17:44,906 Perfect! 376 00:17:56,019 --> 00:17:57,369 Ok, payday! 377 00:17:57,437 --> 00:17:59,388 Who wants a paycheck? 378 00:17:59,456 --> 00:18:00,789 Uh, LA pointe? 379 00:18:00,857 --> 00:18:01,990 LA pon-tay. 380 00:18:02,058 --> 00:18:03,058 Right. There you go. 381 00:18:03,126 --> 00:18:04,059 Deacon? 382 00:18:04,127 --> 00:18:05,060 Thanks, Carrie. 383 00:18:05,128 --> 00:18:06,862 You're welcome. And... 384 00:18:06,930 --> 00:18:09,064 Hefferman? 385 00:18:09,131 --> 00:18:11,817 Actually, it's heffer-nan. 386 00:18:11,885 --> 00:18:12,835 Oh! 387 00:18:12,902 --> 00:18:15,237 Right. Ok, well, here's your check, dick. 388 00:18:16,572 --> 00:18:18,407 Oh, I'm sorry. It's Doug. 389 00:18:18,474 --> 00:18:20,041 I'm sorry. I'm new here. 390 00:18:20,109 --> 00:18:22,027 Ok, florsheim? 391 00:18:22,094 --> 00:18:23,779 Listen, I do need to speak to you 392 00:18:23,847 --> 00:18:26,031 about one non-work-related matter 393 00:18:26,098 --> 00:18:27,257 if that's ok. 394 00:18:27,292 --> 00:18:28,417 What is it? 395 00:18:28,518 --> 00:18:29,367 Well, it's about our Christmas tree. 396 00:18:29,435 --> 00:18:30,502 We're supposed to get it tonight, 397 00:18:30,569 --> 00:18:32,604 that is, if we're still celebrating Christmas. 398 00:18:32,672 --> 00:18:33,805 Well, I know I am. 399 00:18:33,873 --> 00:18:34,539 As am I. In fact, 400 00:18:34,691 --> 00:18:36,792 I'm gettin' a Santa tattoo. 401 00:18:40,947 --> 00:18:42,731 How 'bout this, Doug, 402 00:18:42,799 --> 00:18:46,067 how 'bout we each get our own tree this year? Hmm? 403 00:18:46,135 --> 00:18:48,803 Sounds good to me. Now I can break out my naked lady ornaments. 404 00:18:56,712 --> 00:19:00,249 Ohh. Well, I got my tree. 405 00:19:00,316 --> 00:19:01,683 Oh, is that one yours? 406 00:19:01,751 --> 00:19:03,519 That's adorable. 407 00:19:04,887 --> 00:19:05,754 Actually, um, no. 408 00:19:05,821 --> 00:19:06,988 I'm gonna- this is the tree 409 00:19:07,056 --> 00:19:08,957 that I'm getting right here. 410 00:19:10,927 --> 00:19:11,860 Ok. There you go. 411 00:19:11,928 --> 00:19:12,994 I got it. Yeah. 412 00:19:13,063 --> 00:19:14,163 Ok. 413 00:19:17,267 --> 00:19:18,200 Hi. Hi. 414 00:19:18,268 --> 00:19:19,334 How much for this one? 415 00:19:19,402 --> 00:19:21,085 Uh, that's $55. 416 00:19:21,153 --> 00:19:22,805 $55. All righty. 417 00:19:22,872 --> 00:19:26,341 Here we go. 60. 418 00:19:26,409 --> 00:19:27,225 Ben, honey? 419 00:19:27,293 --> 00:19:28,510 Yeah? You got change? 420 00:19:28,577 --> 00:19:30,779 Oh, I sure do, sweetheart. 421 00:19:30,846 --> 00:19:32,547 Well, where-where'd I put my Fanny pack? 422 00:19:32,615 --> 00:19:34,499 It's in the trailer. Right. 423 00:19:34,567 --> 00:19:36,434 He never remembers anything. 424 00:19:36,502 --> 00:19:38,036 In case you forget, your hat's on your head. 425 00:19:39,772 --> 00:19:41,857 You guys are married? Oh, yeah. 426 00:19:41,924 --> 00:19:43,124 And you work together? 427 00:19:43,192 --> 00:19:46,879 We've been together 24 hours a day since 1951. 428 00:19:46,946 --> 00:19:48,847 Let me get some rope for your car. 429 00:19:48,915 --> 00:19:50,399 Ok. 430 00:19:51,234 --> 00:19:52,751 Wow. 431 00:19:52,819 --> 00:19:54,486 They've worked together for half a century, 432 00:19:54,554 --> 00:19:56,154 and, uh... 433 00:19:56,222 --> 00:19:57,889 We couldn't even make it for 10 days. 434 00:19:58,958 --> 00:20:00,158 We suck. 435 00:20:00,226 --> 00:20:01,894 Yeah. 436 00:20:01,961 --> 00:20:03,061 Look, I'm- 437 00:20:03,128 --> 00:20:05,630 I'm sorry about all this. I- 438 00:20:05,698 --> 00:20:07,065 I love being with you, and if you want, 439 00:20:07,132 --> 00:20:09,100 you can work at I.P.S. Full-time. 440 00:20:09,168 --> 00:20:10,352 Should I quit? 441 00:20:10,420 --> 00:20:11,986 That would make it the best Christmas ever. 442 00:20:12,054 --> 00:20:14,639 Yes, sir, got the change. 443 00:20:14,707 --> 00:20:17,175 And did you want the other tree as well? 444 00:20:17,243 --> 00:20:18,310 Uh, you know what? 445 00:20:18,377 --> 00:20:20,012 I think the one is just good for us. 446 00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:21,146 We're fine. Thank you. 447 00:20:21,214 --> 00:20:23,315 Yeah. Thank you, you guys. 448 00:20:23,382 --> 00:20:25,317 Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. 449 00:20:27,737 --> 00:20:30,489 Nice work. You just cost us a sale. 450 00:20:30,556 --> 00:20:31,490 I did? 451 00:20:31,557 --> 00:20:32,824 Yeah, if you'd had your Fanny pack 452 00:20:32,892 --> 00:20:34,192 around your waist where it belonged, 453 00:20:34,260 --> 00:20:35,827 they wouldn't have time to change their mind. 454 00:20:35,895 --> 00:20:37,429 But the money's safer in the trailer! 455 00:20:37,497 --> 00:20:39,230 Oh, you get stupider every year! 456 00:20:39,298 --> 00:20:40,499 Oh, shut up! 457 00:20:40,566 --> 00:20:42,901 Shut up. Shut up! 458 00:20:42,968 --> 00:20:44,269 Shut up! 459 00:20:44,336 --> 00:20:46,254 Daphne, shut up! 460 00:21:34,237 --> 00:21:35,487 Fire! 30850

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