Original subtitles

Hey, okey, listen to this one

Hey, guys, just wanted to remind you about brunch

at our place in Brooklyn today

Can't wait Love you

She actually thinks we're going to Brooklyn?

I'm not leaving the state for brunch!

That's so stupid

Okay, it gets better

Guys, where are you?

I've got salmon I've got caviar

I've got fruit Get over here

Love you!

She could be serving it on top of a Calvin Klein underwear model

I still ain't going to Brooklyn

- How sad is that? - It can't get any sadder

Can't it?

Nice, real nice You better be coming

You guys suck! I hate you!

Love you

Hey

Have you guys gotten any of those messages from Grace?

They're hilarious!

Blah blah blah...

Love you!

Oh...

So, Wilma, honey, listen

I forget, what are you these days gay or straight?

Wait, wait, wait Let me do a little test

Okay, there's a penis and a vagina in a tent

And it's on fire Which do you save?

Why are they in a tent?

Honey, I'm trying to do you a favor!

I wanna set you up with my cousin, Barry / Ugh

What?!

Why him?!

Why not me?

Will's hideous! No, you're not

He's gross! Not really

People flee from him! Not everyone

Poodle, Will needs it more than you do

- He's desperate! - Hey, I resent that

- Cute and desperate - Thank you

Now, listen to me

Barry is a great guy Honey, he's smart. He's handsome

Oh, he makes the greatest German dill potato salad for family picnics

"Dill"?

That's his best quality? He uses dill?

All right, I'll go out with him

Now, listen, you're meeting him tonight at eight at the Sherry Bar

And wear something tight You got good stuff in there

Guys!

What are you doing?

I've been sitting in my apartment all day I though you were coming to visit me!

We were just leaving

We--we're on our way

We're there Where are you? Hello?

Thanks a lot

You know, Brooklyn is where I live now

And I would think that my friends could take two minutes out of their lives

to come visit me

Who needs ya? I'm going home

It's so far

�� & �׷��̽� 5���� ���Ǽҵ� 13 (Fagmalion Part One ; Gay It Forward)

���� : �̼���(blackmoon80@nate.com) ���� ����: �迵ȯ(withmysoul@lycos.co.kr)

��ũ : �̼���(blackmoon80@nate.com) �����׽�Ʈ : �̼���(memarun@nate.com)

�ڸ� ���� - ����Ʈ ��� 24 �ڸ��� (http://club.nate.com/24) Will & Grace �ڸ���

Yes!

Leo, all my stuff is unpacked and the boxes are gone

I know--finally

Yes, that's a lie

But, I promise you I will only lie about the insignificant things

Yes, that's another lie

I'll see you later tonight, okay?

I'll have a nice dinner waiting

Yes, that is too

Who is it?

Your neighbor

I brought you a housewarming gift

It's a cat

Her name's Pees-On-My-Bed but feel free to change it

to Pees-On-Your-Bed

Thanks, but, um, I'm allergic

Oh, well that's ok

She's a rescue she didn't expect much out of life

I'll just go drown her in the tub with the others

What? No!

Kidding I'm just trying to guilt you

Go home, baby

God!

You have huge feet too

I like that

Yeah

I waited my whole life to develop and those are the only things that grew

- I'm Julie - Grace

- Adler - Adler

I know

The old ladies upstairs told me

By the way, that's where all your magazines are

Interesting

Well, the next time Mrs. Rabinowitz fights me for a cab, boom

She's going right down

Oh. You're dark

Leo needs that

You know, we have a nickname for him in the building

"Wish I were doing him instead of my husband."

You have no boundaries

I like that

So, do you need a hand unpacking?

I'm happy to help...

unless you have a bunch of personal weird stuff you don't want me to see/ No

Just don't open the one marked "Tools"

Hi, sorry I'm late Traffic was a biatch

Okay

Clearly Karen meant to fix this guy up with me

So here's how I see it

Barry and I have dinner

You cry quietly at a nearby table until I signal you to pay the check

I go home with him

You cook us brunch tomorrow Eggs, please

Interesting

Here's how I see it

- I grab you by the ear - Ow! Ow!

- Ow! - I drag you to the door

Ow! Ow! Ow!

And I push you in front of a car/ Ow!

Wait!

You don't understand

- Barry is my soul mate - You haven't even met him

- I love him! - You're crazy

Crazy in love!

- Hey - Hey

You got the time?

Um, I'm supposed to meet my date here at eight

Oh, it's ten after

You know women they love to make an entrance

Apparently so does Will

Oh

Uh, I'm Will

Oh, nice to meet you

- Nice to meet you - Nice to meet you, too

You know, I don't go on a lot of dates

but at some point aren't we supposed to be at the same table?

Not always

- I'm Will - Barry

Cousin Karen didn't do you justice

You're hot

She didn't do you justice either

You're--you're here

- So, shall we order? - Let's order

Kind of a late lunch so I-- and you're holding my hand

It's just, uh-- Dating... it's, uh, a little new for me

Were you in a long term relationship?

Six years

It was pretty serious/ Oh

What was his name?

Mary Elizabeth

Was that his drag name? 'Cause I think I may have seen his show

No, it's a woman

I've never been out with a guy before You're my first!

Huh

- Can I get anyone a drink? - Oh, yeah

What do we homosexuals drink, Will?

Well, legally we can drink whatever we want

That was established in the Flaming Schnapps Act of 1983

Oh, man, this is going great

High five!

Hey, thanks for helping me unpack

Wedding pictures

Oh, no no no You don't want to look at that

It's fifth in a series You need to start with volume one

Grace, God This dress is gorgeous

Everything's so nice

When we got married in my sister's backyard

there was dog poop everywhere and she wore shorts

My sister was so high at my wedding she thought it was my bat mitzvah

She kept shoving 20's down my dress

So we have a lot in common

Our sisters are bitches Both our husbands are doctors

Well, mine's playing one in some Chekhov play in the Bowery (üȣ�� : ���þ� ���۰�)

He makes $80 a week And apparently he's not very good

Wow

Your husband's an actor

You're a massage therapist That is so cool and bohemian

My husband's a doctor

How come we live in the same building?

The apartment belonged to my uncle

He died last year

- I'm sorry - Keep it to yourself

We haven't told the super

Oh

Your back?

Yeah, I pulled it at the gym

Well, on the phone talking about going to the gym

Well, let me give you a massage I'll grab my table

No. No, no, no You've done too much for me already

Oh, please

I'm just so happy to talk to a neighbor

about something other than the Holocaust

Damn, Grace, you're so tense

You're all knots and bones It's like massaging a frozen turkey

Oh...

That feels so good

- Is the pressure okay? - Mm-hmm. Perfect...

- How about here? - Mm-hmm

I'm just gonna go a little lower

You go wherever you need to go

Well...

Thank you, Karen I had my date with Barry last night

Whoo! Tell me everything

Except skip the begging and the tears That I can't stomach

Let's start with his stomach It's soft like a baby's

And like a baby, he just came out!

Yeah, well, you're no prize pig yourself

You got a layer of pink flab a pug nose, a squiggly little tail--

Hey, wait, maybe you are a prize pig!

Why are you in my life you awful, awful woman?!

The point is, you are desperate and he's family

So why don't you two join together in misery and make a rotten go of it, huh?

Honey, you must like him You sent him flowers

and asked him to go out with you again tonight

I didn't send him any-- Oh, God!

Oh, honey, it made his day

And so did that picture of you sound asleep

making a human pyramid in your Joe Boxers

What?!

Oh my God I thought that was a dream

Rosario in camouflage with a feather and a zoom lens

Great Now I've gotta let him down easy

Hey, hey, save it for the locker room

- Unbelievable! - Unbelievable!

- I've got my own problems! - I've got my own problems!

Karen, be honest

All right, I pinched Paul Lynde's wallet at the Desert Inn in '84

Well, that would explain why on your job application

under references you wrote "Not Paul Lynde."

Look, help me with this

I just met my new neighbor, Julie She's a massage therapist

She was helping me unpack and then she gave me a massage

which I think went a little too far...

south

Well, honey, you must've brought it on yourself

What were you wearing?

I was naked, under a sheet

Hmm, that's not it

Oh, my God I got it. I got it

Karen, make an appointment with her

If she does the same thing to you

then I know it's just part of the massage

- But if she doesn't do it to you-- - Then I'll do it to her

No

Then I will know that she was coming on to me

Ah

Honey, exactly where did she touch you?

Show me on this bottle of vodka

Right on the Smirnoff

- Oh, I don't believe this - Please, just hear me out

I have waited

my whole life

to find love

And then

when it finally happens...

I am denied

And by who-em?

My best friend

Please, Will

let me love

Hey, Barry

I'll see you later

Hi

I'm sorry I'm late

I didn't know what to wear for our second homosexual date

Oh, traditionally, whatever's hanging on your homosexual chair

in your homosexual bedroom

Here, I, uh

got you a present

It was 49.99

Oh, look at that It's a...

rainbow flag beach towel

Do you already have one? You probably already have one

No, I don't

And it'll come in handy, when I want people from space

to know that I'm gay

I just thought I should get you something

since you sent me those beautiful flowers

Look...

I gotta tell you something I didn't...

I didn't send you those flowers

Karen, in her twisted way thought she was trying to help

Oh

I thought it was a little weird when the card said

"Thanks for all the good gay sex, honey."

Look, Barry, you're a great guy But I.../ U-u-u-uh, i-it's okay

I'm sorry I'm not better at this

I was bad at being straight now I'm bad at being gay

- It gets easier - I guess

It's just--I really like you

- You don't even know me - I know you enough

You're nice You're really smart

You're handsome

I know....

I'm sorry, Barry, I just--

I don't feel the same way about you

Oh/ But I know someone out there will

You're gonna do great

Look, let's-- let's order

You know, it says "no sharing," but I say let's share

And dare them to oppose us What do you say?

You know what I think I'd rather go home

But thanks

I'll see you, Will

Keep the towel

So, what happened?

Did she knock, knock knock on heaven's door?

What a waste!

I choppered that girl in from Brooklyn and all I got was a lousy massage!

I get more play outta Rosie

when she's washing my bra with me still in it

Great

I guess I'm gonna have to have a talk with Julie

Same talk I had with the gift wrappers at Bloomingdale's

Shouldn't your finger be on that box?

I just saw Barry leave What happened?

I... / Look, I just bought this bag from the guy out front

Why are you buying a woman's purse?

'Cause it goes with the shoes

Oh, geez, Jack

Why so sad, big tiny?

I just had to let Barry down

The guy just came out and his first real date rejects him

What?!

He's never been with a man before?!

So he's the virgin Barry

I feel bad for him

Of course you feel bad

You are Barry Barry is you

Ergo, you is Barry

Ergo, you is idiot

Perhaps

But I remember another boy who struggled on his way out of the closet

He had a little crush on me

I found him repellent

But still, I took him under my wing I fixed his hair

Taught him how to dress

Yeah, you sent me to job interview

wearing leg warmers with Chinese slippers

Perhaps

But the point is, we senior gays have a responsibility to the freshmen

To teach them to bring them along

Why, I helped turn this caterpillar into a chubby butterfly

And now you should do the same for Barry

Why?

Why is this my responsibility?

Because that's what we do in the community

We gay it forward

How long you been sitting on that one?

Pretty much since the movie came out

Listen, I need to talk to you about something

Um, the massage last night...

This is gonna sound crazy

But did it mean more to you than it did to me?

Well, I didn't get paid so I doubt it

No, no What I mean is...um...

Did you come onto me?

What?

'Cause you were really thorough

Dude

I'm a massage therapist, okay? I go where the tension is

It really bums me out that you would think anything different

Oh, oh, gosh I'm so sorry

Of course I mean, I just...

I didn't realize I was tense there

- Maybe I should go - No, don't go. I'm sorry

I'm from the city We are not a trusting people

So I-- You know, I wasn't sure

I mean we were up all night drinking and laughing

And it ended with what I thought was inappropriate touching

Seemed like a lot of dates I've been on

Grace, when was the last time you had a girlfriend?

I mean, this is what we do We talk. We kiss. We hug

We get to be intimate It's what makes us better than men

Why do you think they die first?

I don't really have a lot of girlfriends

Well, I do, but they're men

Look, I gotta jet

But tomorrow night you wanna catch a film?

I'd love to

Good

'cause Greg's gonna be off somewhere doing stand-up

I mean, he doesn't make me laugh but God bless

See you then

Will?

This is my friend, Jack He'll be assisting me in this project

Now get dressed we're going to the gym

It's after midnight

You're not ready to be seen during peak cruising hours

What's this about?

We're here to help

You got a late start but we're gonna take care of you

and raise you right

Think of us as your 'mo pair

- How long you been sitting on that one? - Just since the cab

Here's your starter kit

All the Tales of the City books Kiehl's non-alcohol face toner

Ethel Merman Gypsy Angela Lansbury Gypsy

Tyne Daly Gypsy, and Pez

- Why Pez? - Because it's fun

See, candy comes out of the neck

There's so much to learn

Well, you're in good hands I just had a beautiful manicure