Original subtitles

[scanner beeping]

Cash or credit?

-[cash register beeps] -[coins clanking]

[cash register ringing]

[indistinct chatter]

[clicks]

[classical ballet music playing]

[instructor] Three, four.

[arcade game music]

[digital trilling]

[buttons beeping]

[whirring]

[sighs]

[narrator on TV] Previously on Order and Reprimand.

[man on TV] She can't have been dead that long.

The body shows no signs of decay.

[woman on TV] That's because he kept her in a freezer for two weeks.

[man on TV] That's what I call a cold case.

[baby crying]

[crying continues]

[woman] I'm sorry. I don't see that for you.

[clicks]

[scanner beeps]

-[woman] Hey, how are you? -[man] Doing good. How you doing?

[woman] Pretty good.

-[cash register ringing] -[indistinct chatter]

[PA chimes]

[woman on PA] …can you come see me, please?

[sighs]

[clicks]

Hey.

Uh, do you have a second to chat?

Did I fuck up?

No, no, not at all. I'm just, um, checking in.

How are you getting on?

-Great, it's, um-- -Boring.

Yeah, I… I know, I started at the checkout too.

Not complaining.

Grateful to work.

Yeah, I mean, every job has its challenges.

Do you have any, um, hobbies or goals?

Look, I'm… I'm not trying to pry, okay? And you're doing great.

It's just that you're not the first placement

we've had from the program and we want you to last.

I understand that you had some trouble at your previous job

and the one before that.

Transitioning from where you were to where you need to be,

that can be tough.

How long have you been with the program now?

-Two years. -And here you are starting over, again.

And that can't be easy, but…

having goals, even tiny ones, professional or otherwise,

especially in a boring place like this, they can be helpful.

Forgive me for saying this, okay? I can't imagine what you've been through.

Myself, the closest I ever got

was a week in the hospital with a collapsed lung, but…

Anya, you…

You seem a little listless.

So, do you have any?

Goals.

[ballet music playing]

[instructor] Left. You need to first…

[ballet music playing]

With your whole body. That's it.

Breathe into it, yes.

That's it. Breathe into it.

[ballet music continues]

[arcade game music]

[sighs]

[whirring]

[narrator on TV] Previously on Order and Reprimand.

[woman on TV] No sign of a break-in, so I figure it was premeditated.

One pattern suggests blunt force trauma on both victims.

I'm thinking he killed the girl in bed first with a hammer.

[man on TV] And the boy?

[woman on TV] Probably heard the commotion.

How was your day?

[woman on TV] Wrong place at the wrong time.

We should ask for prints.

[man on TV] Shame.

Maybe these kids didn't drink, but they sure got hammered.

[TV shuts off]

[static]

[Kevin] To those before, to those after.

-To us now… -[clicks]

[dog barks in distance]

[static]

[radio announcer] Moving in your AM commute

with 50,000 watts of FM power.

Find us at the top of the dial playing the top of the charts.

All rock n' roll, all morning.

We are KSXP.

[rock singer] ♪ Must be your skin I'm sinking in ♪

♪ Must be for real Because now I can feel ♪

[Anya] Spontaneous regression.

I used to have this roommate back at the place I used to live.

She was into all kinds of stuff that I thought was…

really dumb.

Once she told me about this saint.

He had this tumor on his leg and it wouldn't go away.

And he got real sick from something else,

and his body kicked in to beat the cold or flu or whatever.

And, uh, ended up killing the tumor, too.

Just like that, his body decided to do right by him.

Spontaneous regression.

And I laughed in her face.

[Anya clears throat]

I was in real bad shape a few years back.

And my friends at the time…

my roommate, it was her idea, actually. (chuckles)

They snuck me out of my room one night and decided…

to try something…

crazy, like…

[chuckles] …batshit crazy.

To help me.

And I got really sick.

Like, really sick.

Fever, in and out of consciousness.

Everyone thought I was a goner.

And then, for once,

my body decided to do the right fucking thing.

And I woke up.

And I guess…

And I guess I got better, didn't I?

[Anya inhales]

And this… thing that had defined so much of me,

that had defined so much of my life,

was suddenly just…

gone.

But instead of feeling saved,

I felt chewed up and spit out,

like it had eaten parts of me.

Good parts.

And here I am.

Whatever's left.

[clears throat]

Spontaneous regression.

It sounded so fucking stupid…

to me at the time.

Still does.

But that roommate,

wherever she is,

I hope…

she's laughing.

I think she deserves that.

[scanner beeps]

-[plastic rustles] -[scanner beeps]

[beeping continues]

[ballet music playing]

[chimes ringing]

[arcade game music]

[phone dialing]

[phone ringing]

[sighs]

Hello.

Hi.

Rhett?

Yeah.

[Rhett] I'm here.

How are you? How… How've you been?

It's good to hear your voice.

[indistinct TV chatter]

A-Anya, what do you want?

Nothing, I'm just…

I'm just calling, you know?

I…

I haven't heard from you in like…

[sighs]

-What do you want? -Nothing.

Things are better…

for me now.

So much better.

So I just thought I'd call you, you know, to share that.

Just to let you know that I'm okay.

And I'm sorry.

[Rhett] For what?

All of it.

I don't know…

what you want from me here, Anya.

[Anya] Nothing, I just… I'm in the city now, and I'm…

I'm alone, and I don't know anyone.

And I just thought you could tell me…

Maybe you could just tell me that it's all gonna be…

That it's gonna be okay.

What's gonna be okay?

[Anya] Any of it.

I can't…

make it right.

I can't make me right.

I could never imagine a life in which anything ever fucking worked out for me.

I never could.

There's this voice in my head, you know, and it just keeps telling me,

"You're broken."

"You're broken, you're broken," over and over.

And I just can't, I just…

I can't make it stop.

I just…

I just wish you'd fucking talk to me.

I apologized.

I apologized.

And, yeah, I was a nightmare, and I…

I fucked up.

But you vanished!

I needed you!

You were the only family I had left!

And, yeah, I walked away.

But all I wanted was for you to come find me.

[Rhett] Anya…

Why couldn't you just come fucking find me, Rhett?

You knew me well enough to know I never would!

[call ends]

Rhett?

Rhett!

-[busy tone] -[screams]

[crashing]

[sobbing]

[baby crying]

-[static] -[baby crying]

[Spence] Seen or unseen. Here, but not here.

[group leader] I'd like to touch on something

that you mentioned in our last session.

[Anya] Okay.

I couldn't help but notice your phrasing, you said, um…

"My friends at the time."

Would you say that they're no longer your friends?

-They're not here anymore. -Here as in local or here as in…

Jesus Christ! Am I the only one that contributes to this group?

Feel free to chime in.

Any time, guys.

Nothing, okay.

[group leader] You know, the… the people that we…

that we lose, they're…

they're never really gone.

Bullshit.

You know, I…

I used to think that they were reaching out.

Sending little messages from beyond. Sending a sign.

I used to search high and low, but it's all just…

The thing about spontaneous regression is that it only seems… like magic

when really it's just the immune system boosted by an infection

doing what it already does.

No magic there.

Because if magic existed, if there was…

any… justice in this world…

what worked for me would have worked for them.

And they'd still be here.

But they're not.

They're all dead.

And five…

bloody sisters would have chimed in for them too. The whole club.

I mean, we did the ritual six more times, it…

[breathes shakily]

Five bitches sent us all to voicemail.

Now all my friends are gone.

Sandra, dead. Cheri, dead.

Amesh, dead. And he went so…

[breathing heavily]

Kevin, dead. Natsuki, dead.

Ilonka, Miss Magical Thinking herself…

dead.

Dead a year now.

And if what you're saying is true,

if they were still with me,

they'd be yelling.

Not whispering.

They'd be shouting, screaming, shaking the walls

to let me know that I don't have to be afraid anymore.

That I don't have to hate myself because I'm here and they're not.

I mean, if…

they were still here…

what type of friend wouldn't?

[beeps]

-[indistinct chatter] -[scanner beeps]

[ominous music]

What the fuck?

Sorry, I couldn't find a price tag on that.

Everything okay here?

I couldn't find the tag.

Um, I'll take over from here.

[speaker chimes]

I need a price check on a claw hammer.

Check out one, price check on a claw hammer.

[unsettling music]

[ballet music playing]

[arcade game music]

Oh, my… Oh, my god.

[Anya] Oh, my god. Amesh?

Amesh! Amesh, oh, my god!

Oh, my god! It worked for you too!

Ma'am? Um…

Look at you.

I thought it didn't… I thought… I thought it didn't work.

What worked?

The ritual, spontaneous regression.

You're here. You're fucking here, Amesh!

My name is Luke, ma'am.

Uh, like it says on the tag here.

-I don't… -[Luke] I--

Everything okay?

I don't… understand.

I think this woman might need a little bit of help here.

Are you…

Are you fucking with me?

-Uh, Luke, we should call somebody. -Yes, good idea.

[phone buttons clicking]

Yeah, hi. We're at the game store on Main Street.

We have a woman here. She's a little disoriented. Um…

She might need some assistance.

I came as soon as I could. What seems to be the trouble?

Are you okay, miss?

[unsettling music]

[ominous music]

[gasps]

[gunshot]

-[gunshot] -[screams]

I never wanted to.

I really didn't.

[gasps, breathes shakily]

[yelps]

[ominous music stings]

[unsettling music]

[Anya groans]

[music stops]

[woman on TV] He just jumped in after him,

but when he didn't come up right away, I did the only thing I could think of.

I… I dove in too. But I couldn't find him anywhere.

[sinister music]

[shrieks]

[gunshot]

[unsettling music]

[sloshing]

[baby crying]

[crying continues]

[giggles]

[chortles]

[woman groans, sighs]

[faint screaming]

[screaming intensifies]

[sobs quietly]

[static]

[Ilonka] Hello, Anya.

Midnight, my friend.

As usual, we're broadcasting to you live from the hallway.

And I'm happy to report that Stanton has gone nuclear.

She hasn't spoken to any of us since she saw us in the basement.

And we're sure as shit not allowed in the library right now.

But I spoke to Mark and he told me that she said this was specifically okay,

so they know we're here this time.

And Natsuki wanted to…

-[Spence] Ilonka, invocation. -[Ilonka] Oh, sorry.

Um, to those before, to those after.

To us now, and to those beyond.

[all] To those before, to those after.

To us now and to those beyond.

[Ilonka] Seen or unseen, here but not here.

-[all] Seen or unseen, here but not here. -Seen or unseen, here but not here.

[Ilonka] So the night before last, we had Kevin,

and last night we had Spence.

And tonight we have something very special for you.

Natsuki?

[Natsuki] Hey, Anya. I, uh, wrote this for you.

I asked around 'cause there was some stuff I didn't know about you

You treasure trove of secrets, you.

Okay, here we go. It's the night of the ritual…

[chanting unintelligibly]

We're all chanting around you.

And then it happens. A flash of light.

You vanished from the room, gone.

And for a week, just like Julia Jayne,

no one can find you.

But then you showed back up.

Healed, healthy, just like Julia did.

Stanton lays out your options, but you stay at Brightcliffe

for a few more weeks, repeating the ritual for each of us.

And it works for all of us.

We take over a whole floor of an apartment.

It's a coed Brightcliffe invasion

"…with rent control, plus disability checks, plus--"

Oh, I thought we were gonna keep this part grounded after the ritual part?

I'm telling the story. Okay?

Sorry, Anya.

It's okay. [laughs]

"Point being, it's super cheap, and we can live there forever.

Uh, you enroll in college and you get a prosthetic leg,

so you can start taking dance classes again.

"After a fantastic dance rehearsal one day…"

[instructor] Hand.

[Natsuki] …who should walk in, but your old childhood friend.

Rhett.

You mend fences.

And pick out a house together,

with a white picket one.

And there you stay…

[Anya laughing]

…for years, and years, and years.

You have kids.

[Amesh] Sandra did M.A.S.H to determine exactly how many.

-Two-and-a-half beautiful children. -[Sandra] He's kidding.

With babies, you always round up. So it's a clean three.

[Cheri] And a German shepherd.

[Natsuki] And a fluffy German shepherd per Cheri.

Did I miss anything?

-[Spence] The car. -[dog barks]

It's a pink jeep with a skull painted on the hood.

[Natsuki] Perfect.

And there you live out the rest of your days with your family.

Safe, happy, in love.

[Spence] Oh, and we bought the other houses on the block, so…

What's up?

[laughter]

[Amesh] You enter suburbia.

Old friends track you down for weekly potlucks,

and there is no exit.

[Natsuki] That's all I've got for tonight.

Ilonka's on bat for the story for tomorrow so…

you're in for a treat.

[Amesh] Good night, Anya.

-[Cheri] Good night, friend. -[Sandra] Sleep tight.

-[Spence] Good night, Duchess. -[Kevin] Good night, Anya.

[Ilonka] It's just you and me now.

I hope I'm not keeping you up too late.

I just… I wanted to say a few things.

Roomie to roomie.

I just wanted to say that I'm sorry.

About the ritual.

When you passed out, I…

I've never been more panicked in my life.

[Ilonka] You should've seen Stanton.

[inaudible dialogue]

I don't know if she'll ever talk to me again, to be honest.

[scoffs]

She said words only you could have taught her.

I hope you can forgive me.

It's just so fucking unfair.

What's happening to you, what's happening to us.

So…

I hope you hear me when I say…

we're all with you in there,

and we always will be.

Thank you.

[Ilonka] You're not alone.

[dramatic music]

Everything's going to be okay.

[heart monitor beeping]

[Ilonka] Good night, Anya.

Good night.

-[intercom shuts off] -[breathing heavily]

[dramatic music intensifies]

[music stops]

[Ilonka] Oh. No, thank you.

[sniffles]

I want to feel these.

You know, someone said once,

"One should die proudly

when it's no longer possible to live proudly."

Friedrich Nietzsche.

I was salutatorian once…

in another life.

A short, short life.

It's not length of life but depth of life.

That was Ralph Waldo Emerson.

And your friend, she…

Well, you know, she lived deep.

And she was kind, even when she was in a lot of pain.

That's hard to do.

That's beautiful.

You know, sometimes, she was a…

fierce, right firecracker bitch on fucking wheels.

-[laughs] -But… that was beautiful too.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, he had one more I've always liked.

"It is the secret of the world

that all things subsist and do not die,

but retire a little from sight…

and then afterwards…

return again."

And John Lennon once said something like…

"Death is just getting out of one car and into another."

You know what I'd say?

Fuck the car.

And fuck cancer, too.

Everything?

She left it all to you.

What's this?

Other than the bank account,

the insurance, and everything in Anya's room,

that's all she left.

I don't care about the money.

Neither did she.

Did she say why?

[Dr. Stanton] And there's one other matter.

[clanks]

I need you to tell me where you found it, what you were doing downstairs,

and why I shouldn't throw you out of this house.

Do not think for one moment that I won't.

You do not know me, Ilonka.

You do not know anything.

I found that journal in the library, actually.

So if you're expecting a story better than that,

I'm sorry to disappoint.

And what were we doing in the basement?

We're wasting time trying to change something that couldn't be changed.

We're wasting Anya's time.

And that's really the worst part because she really didn't have any left.

So if you're gonna throw me out, please just do it now

because I've had about just as much as I can handle today.

[sighs]

The ritual, the five sisters.

-It didn't work. -Not for Anya.

No, it didn't. And that is not your fault.

These things, they're not… It's not like baking.

It's not just about the right words and ingredients.

You tried and that matters. It mattered to Anya. I promise you that.

[Ilonka] Your tattoo.

What is it?

We all have them.

It's not sinister. It's an hourglass.

The hourglass meant a lot going back into the ancient world.

It was one of the earliest methods of keeping time.

You see what's making it up?

In Ancient Greece, this was Earth and this was air.

As above, so below.

But the thing about an hourglass, the most important thing…

is that you can turn it over.

Life can prevail.

That… that is what the Paragon was trying to do, they just…

they got lost along the way.

How do you know about the Paragon?

They came here for a lot of the same reasons we did.

The soil, water, ley lines.

All the rumors, they're true.

Airplanes really do get glitches in their instruments

when they fly over this area.

Legends of healing fill these woods.

It brings the rich and the dying, the new age cults, UFO enthusiasts,

and just about every other color of crazy over the years.

We are a naturopathic collective so we are gentle as kittens

compared to some of the others that have come this way.

It's important to do no harm.

Unless you have to.

Oh. I should… get going.

Stanton's already pissed.

Georgina has a chip on her shoulder. No doubt.

Maybe one of these days she'll figure out she can put it down.

[whirring]

[ringing, beeping]

[automated voice] We're sorry, your call cannot be completed as dialed.

Please check the number and dial again or call your…

[phone clanks]

[knocks on door]

I'm… [chuckles softly]

I'm sorry for your…

[sighs] I'm just sorry.

[Tim sighs]

[Ilonka sobs]

What does she want us to do with them?

She didn't say.

At least not her pre-need.

And she left this.

I haven't opened it yet.

Go ahead.

"To those who came before, to us now, and to those that came after.

Seen but unseen, here but not here.

I've given a lot of thought to that invocation,

and it's pretty fucking generous.

So I'll simplify it.

To us, to you…

my family.

Since youse got so high on the Greeks,

the Greeks believed when you got to the underworld,

you drink from the River Lethe, and you forget everything.

That's why nobody sends a sign, they said.

Pretty lame excuse, but here we go.

If anyone can send a sign from that other side,

unambiguous and definite, I'm the bitch, I'll fucking do it.

So if you're reading this and you didn't hear back, relax.

It's all just fucking oblivion.

Raise an empty glass for me tonight.

For now, I drink no more.

Love to you all, Anya.

P.S. Sorry about the ashes. Fucking dramatic, right?"

[laughs]

"Snort them, use them as seasoning

or scatter them on the fucking moon for all I care.

I've gone supernova."

Fuck.

[Kevin] I mean, all of it…

The signs from beyond, the pack, the stories.

It feels kind of stupid tonight, doesn't it?

To Anya…

who drinks no more.

[all] To Anya who drinks no more.

[door opens]

I've always loved how the library looks with the lights out.

[door closes]

[Dr. Stanton] Lights out and a fire, that's really the way to do it.

It's a perfect ambiance for a meeting of the Midnight Club.

All these years, it's always struck me as funny

that you kids think that because I don't stop you,

that means I must not know.

You think we don't notice when all of our patients sneak out at midnight?

You think the night nurses don't hear your voices through the doors?

Of course, we know.

Why do you think there's always fresh firewood?

I love falling asleep knowing the fire was lit,

knowing the club was in session.

Year after year, the faces change.

But the halls of Brightcliffe are filled at night

with the whispered sounds of stories.

The sounds of stories are the sounds of life.

I don't know what to do with you all.

What you were doing in that room…

I don't know what to do with that.

It's as simple as locking the doors, really.

These doors, sure.

And the doors to your rooms, which feels… wrong.

We have an arrangement.

I make very, very few rules.

And in return I offer…

Well, you know what it is by now?

Independence, dignity, agency, please don't make me regret that.

Not ever again.

I'm gonna ask that all of you return to bed now.

I'll think on tomorrow.

I trust you can find your way back to your rooms. Okay?

-[door closes] -Well…

That's that, I guess.

[door closes]

Let's go to bed.

I have a better idea.

-But Stanton said… -[Ilonka] I know what she said,

but I also know that she's not gonna kick all of us out of Brightcliffe.

Ilonka, maybe it's time to just go to bed.

No, I don't think so. Not just yet.

Look, Anya didn't get a funeral.

Not a proper one anyways.

And I think we fix that.

[water lapping]

[Cheri singing] ♪ Another turning point ♪

♪ A fork stuck in the road ♪

♪ Time grabs you by the wrist Directs you where to go ♪

♪ So make the best of this test And don't ask why ♪

♪ It's not a question But a lesson learned in time ♪

♪ It's something unpredictable But in the end it's right ♪

♪ I hope you had the time of your life ♪

[cello music playing]

[all singing] ♪ So take the photographs And still frames in your mind ♪

♪ Hang it on a shelf In good health and good time ♪

♪ Tattoos of memories And dead skin on trial ♪

♪ For what it's worth It was worth all the while ♪

♪ It's something unpredictable But in the end it's right ♪

♪ I hope you had the time of your life ♪

[cello music playing]

[all singing] ♪ It's something unpredictable ♪

♪ But in the end it's right ♪

♪ I hope you had the time of your life ♪

[cello music fading]

Yo, are you coming?

In a minute.

[Kevin] Whatcha doing?

Just seeing how long it takes the water to make me numb.

[Ilonka sighs]

Sorry.

No, you're fine.

Listen…

Don't spin out.

It doesn't matter.

All of us here,

we're already gone.

Sorry, that…

[sighs] That didn't come out right.

[sighs] Fuck.

[sniffles]

♪ Goodbye to you, my trusted friend ♪

♪ But we've known each other Since we were nine or ten ♪

♪ Together we've climbed hills and trees ♪

♪ Learned of love and ABC's ♪

♪ Skinned our hearts And skinned our knees ♪

♪ Goodbye, my friend, it's hard to die ♪

♪ When all the birds Are singing in the sky ♪

♪ Now that the spring is in the air ♪

♪ We had joy, we had fun We had seasons in the sun ♪

♪ But the hills that we climbed Were just seasons… ♪

[Dr. Stanton sighs]

[sniffles]

[Dr. Stanton sobs quietly]

[phone dialing]

[Dr. Stanton] I'm sorry, it's so late.

No, I'm not great.

I lost a girl and, um…

It was a beautiful young woman. [sobs]

Just a fierce, fierce young woman.

And this one just hit me so hard. I don't know why.

And the other kids, they tried to…

[breathing heavily]

They just dug up all of this old…

this old stuff.

[sighs]

But that's not the crazy thing.

The craziest thing in the middle of all of it is I get a…

I get a phone call from these two doctors.

I haven't had a call like this but one time in my life,

and I don't know how to process it.

[exhales deeply]

One of my kids is going home.

I don't know all the details yet.

I looked over the lab results and it's pretty…

They might not be terminal.

But I think…

I mean…

I think we're gonna send someone home.

And so, I'm… Yeah, I'm smoking a joint and I'm calling you.

I just need to talk to someone.

[Dr. Stanton sobs]

-Because I am so out of my depth here. -[feet thudding]

Oh…

[whispers] Can you hang on?

Sweetheart.

[gasps]

I'm hungry.

I'm hungry. So hungry.

Sweetheart.

[breathing heavily]

[sinister music]

[doorknob clacking]

[rattling]

[Ilonka breathing heavily]

[mirror man] Darling.

[ominous music stings]

[breathing shakily]

[doorknob rattling]

[somber music]