All language subtitles for Kiff.S01E54.Dial.B.For.Butt.720p.DSNP.WEB-DL.DDP5.1.H.264-NTb_track4_[eng]

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Original subtitles

[announcer] Brought to you by Putter's Golf Clubs.

Not just for putting.

[gentle classical music playing]

[cups clinking]

[slurps]

[Kiff, British accent] "Uh, Mummy, may I have a sugar cube?"

[Beryl] "Of course, bloke."

"Would you like an egg salad finger sandwich, Mummy?"

[Beryl] "Oh, no, thank you. Very gross."

[both chuckle]

"Ooh. Perhaps a crustless cucumber?"

[both chuckle]

[cell phone buzzing]

Hello.

Who is it?

[faint scraping]

Who is it?

Put it on speaker.

[clears throat] Um...

Hmm.

Uh...

Hmm.

- [faint scraping] - Ah.

[scraping continues]

Oh...

it's a butt dial.

[scraping continues]

[piano music plays]

[classical music playing]

[scraping continues]

[gasps] Oh, he moved his butt.

[garbled speech] Al... right... De... an... Kim.

Did she say, "Dean Kim"?

Dean Kim's the dean at my university.

[male voice] We must create a diversion...

and... fun... for the scholar...

...ship.

This is very weird.

"Diversion of scholarship funds"?

[mysterious music playing]

- [tram humming] - [scraping continues]

- [birds chirping] - [scraping continues]

- [scraping] - [scraping continues]

- [cash register beeps] - [scraping continues]

[riders scream]

[scraping continues]

- [car horn honks] - [engine rumbles]

[grumbles] Noisy street.

[car horn honks]

[sneaky music playing]

- Yes? - Are you guys

with the Federal Bungalow of Investigation?

No.

- How'd you know? - I mean, unmarked van, nice parking space,

- little satellite dish. - It's pretty obvious.

Aw, man.

We got made, partner.

Aw, man. Again.

Can we borrow your top-notch headphones for a bit?

Uh, no, you cannot borrow our--

Wait, is that a doggy bag from the Plaza?

They're still doing tea?

Heck yeah! For another 15 minutes. Hurry!

We can keep an eye on your van.

'Kay. But just use the headphones,

and don't touch anything. Seriously.

There's a box of confiscated fireworks in the back, okay?

Be careful. Bye!

[both panting]

- [grunts] - [car alarm blares]

[mysterious music playing]

[scraping continues]

[scraping continues]

Well, this dried up.

[male voice] ...acquire and destroy.

Pegasus... field.

"Pegasus Field"? [gasps]

That's Table Town's most beloved national park!

Yes! It's where all the pegasuses live!

[peaceful music playing]

Wait, is it pegasuses or pegasi?

[male voice] ...all of the 18 holes...

Eighteen holes? [gasps]

Like golf course 18 holes?

Wait, the dean of my university is diverting scholarship funds

to secretly buy the land rights to Pegasus Field

and turn it into a golf course?

What about the pegasuses?

What's gonna happen to them?

I love all this open space.

[yells]

[mysterious music plays]

[peppy music playing]

Five p. Quittin' time.

We need to see the paperwork for Pegasus Field.

To make sure it's protected land.

Oh, I'm actually on my way out.

Glarbin Gloobin, do your civic duty!

Okay, Pegasus Field.

"Is Pegasus Field protected"?

Huh.

It's not. I-I swore it was.

Oh, gosh. Total nightmare.

Can you make it protected?

[shady music playing]

Yes! Seems there's a very simple drop-down menu option.

Hold on. It's loading.

It works a little slower after 5 p.

[computer chugging]

- [fanfare plays] - Okay!

Pegasus Field is now protected land.

You're all set.

- Yeah! - Yeah!

[male voice over phone] I'm mad... furious.

- ...Pegasus... - That confirms it. They were gonna buy it.

- [opening theme music playing] - We have no choice

but to take out the little green fella from the hall.

- [both gasp] - What? They're eliminating Glarbin.

This has gone way too far.

Glarb, you're in danger!

We have to get you somewhere safe!

I knew this day would come.

[yelling]

[objects crashing]

[objects crashing]

Um...

Uh, G-Glarbin, we gotta go.

I was gonna quickly make a sandwich.

- Hurry! - [panting]

[mysterious music playing]

[scraping on phone continues]

[gears click]

Shh.

[chews]

[scraping continues]

[male voice] Since our initial plans have been foiled,

we must now destroy the entire city.

He's out of control. Is the dean always like this?

No, but he's clearly a master manipulator.

We have to confront him face to face.

[chews] You have access to all...

of Table Town's resources.

[smacks] Whatever you need to protect me.

And to protect the city of Table Town, too?

Yeah, sure.

[ominous music playing]

What say we end this meeting early and...

hit the links.

[laughing]

I love golf.

It's over, Dean Kim.

Yeah, we won't let you destroy the city,

just like we didn't let you turn Pegasus Field into a golf course.

Hah! That's right. That was us!

We are stopping your evil plans!

[laughs]

My evil plan to do what?

What is all this?

Oh, don't play dumb, you genius.

We've been listening to you all day,

because you butt-dialed my mom!

That's impossible. My phone's in the shop.

[disappointed music playing]

[scraping continues]

Huh. Where?

[male voice] Everything's in place.

We begin destructor mode... the hour.

- [screams] - Whoa!

- See? - We'll track the call,

intercept them in no time.

- Wait, you can do that? - Of course.

Okee...

the call is coming from...

the old abandoned cave on the outskorts of town.

[mysterious notes play]

[military music playing]

Now let's do this

like it's the first time we've done it today.

We'll have to sneak around to the engine room.

That way, we take--

Who dares disturb our sacred game?

[both] Game?

Yeah, our game.

Star Star Throne Quest.

[both] Reggie?

I'm sorry. Reggie?

[echoing through phone] Yeah.

You correctly identified me.

Would anyone else like to try?

- Looks like we found our butt dialer. - [cell phone beeps]

But where's the voice we were hearing all day?

You mean this voice? Ahem.

[deeper] Hello, Kiff. It is I, Admiral Hardwick

of the Astronomical Alliance.

- Oh! - Oh!

- That is the voice. - Okay, yeah.

But someone called you Dean Kim.

That was Liz K. talking

to our other nerd friends, Dee and Kim.

- Oh. - Oh, okay.

- That's funny. - Yeah, okay.

What about "diversion, funds, scholarship"?

[Reggie] We had to create a diversion.

I said, "Hey, it'll be fun."

There was an enemy scholar on our ship

who we suspected was feeding theories back to his peeps.

Oh. Woof.

Okay, well, you literally said,

"Acquire and destroy Pegasus Field."

[Reggie] We acquired a nuclear device

that allowed us to destroy an asteroid field

near the Pegasus constellation.

What about the 18 holes?

Ah, very good memory, Beryl.

Our spaceship suffered 18 holes

from the aforementioned asteroids.

[water dripping]

Wow, so it really was just a big misunderstanding.

No. No, no. What about getting your vengeance

on the "little green fella from the hall"?

How is that not Glarbin?

That is Glarbin. He usually plays with us,

and today, he was a no-show for some reason.

- [relaxed notes play] - [snoring]

He must be punished.

We take group attendance very seriously.

Well, I'm humbled.

And sorry?

Oh! That, too. Of course. Of course.

Oh, don't be sorry. This is more action than I've seen my whole career.

- Yeah. [laughs] - We were bored, too.

- [explosions popping] - What the...

Ah, we needed a new van, anyway.

Quite a show you put on back there.

[groans] Please don't fire my mom.

[laughs] I would never.

Literally, I can't.

She has tenure. Brilliant woman.

[relaxed music playing]

[British accent] Mummy, I believe

we caused a bit of a stir. Ho, ho, ho, ho.

Well, all's well that ends well, wouldn't you say, bloke?

Wouldn't you say? Hmm? Wouldn't you?

[all laugh]

Anyone up for a little Star Star Throne Quest?

[closing theme music playing]

Chirp.

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