Original subtitles

JOYCE: Irwin wants to move the trial tomorrow.

I think it'll work.

We've been doing five boxes a day, and we've got four to go.

God, Furillo, the agony of offering a client's testimony

in a 12-defendant drug case.

Joyce, where are all my suits?

Cleaners. Be done this afternoon.

-What am I supposed to wear today? -I left the blue one.

-Joyce. -What?

-These have a hole. -Ugh.

I'm sorry. I didn't know that.

I've been working ten hours a day

in a courthouse cubicle for the past two weeks,

and I don't have time to inspect every one of your suits.

I could have taken them in myself, you know.

(laughs) Come on.

You haven't been to a cleaners since Carter was president.

That's ridiculous.

-That's wrong. -Here.

Wear these.

In 'Nam we called this a situational interdiction.

The mugger completes his raid

and then heads for his sanctuary in the park

where our stepped-up perimeter patrols

intercept along these borders here, which the felon needs cross to safety.

And so with your help, sectors B and C people,

Van Buren Park is won back from the boonies

and transformed into a demilitarized zone

where the peace-loving folk of our precinct

can smoke their dope and transmit their venereal disease in relative safety.

(laughing)

To which further regard, Item 10...

Oh, worked with Ho Chi Minh, why not the Hill?

...Division Commander Swanson...

-Andrew. -Yes, sir?

Something the whole class could enjoy?

I was just trying to recollect. I-- I thought we lost that war.

(laughing)

Memo indicates that Division's observation

that the National Weather Service now employs

both male and female nomenclature for hurricanes.

To wit, at minimum, Division requests

that in view of 17 percent female officers in the department,

all B sectors be denominated distaff.

Examples given are Barb, Beth, Belinda, or Bunny.

Bunny? Sector Bunny?

Item 12, we have a backup alert here, people,

for, uh, Officer Tina Russo's undercover pursuit

of one Alphonse Sonny Cappelito,

who is accused of the Amtrak warehouse heist

and other high-stakes burglaries.

I, uh, I think that's it, people.

Oh, wait a minute. Hold. That is not it. As you were.

Not it at all.

This precinct has received a post card with a picture of a largemouth bass on it,

and it is postmarked Williamsville.

And it reads, "Wish you were here. Wish I was there.

No, really, recuperating great. Sarge."

And it's in parenthesis, Stan Jablonski.

(cheering)

All right, be careful out there.

The weather forecast is clear skies,

high temperatures with corresponding restlessness

among the indigenous population.

Be alert.

Andy, Bobby, Domestic.

You know what? I know I sound cliché,

but if these people just ate the proper breakfast in the morning,

there wouldn't be so much of this domestic violence first thing in the day.

-Captain. -Gentlemen.

Captain look a little weird to you today?

Frank.

A sport coat?

-Joyce sent all my suits to the cleaners. -8:00 with the chief, Frank.

(siren blares)

I was just thinking, a couple eggs, maybe a muffin.

Kind of makes you feel content in the morning.

But these people, you know, all they do is shoot dope all the time.

Shoot it all morning. Shoot it all night. Oh, lord, Bobby. Look at that.

I say don't come up here right now.

I'll drop this child right now.

Okay, no one's gonna come up.

Get Goldblume and the paramedics.

Give me my baby!

-Look out, Renko! -(woman screams)

(baby crying)

(applause)

WOMAN (on radio): Dispatch, we have a 9-11.

Armed robbery in progress.

See Surplus Store, corner People's Drive and 124th Street.

(sirens wailing)

(theme music playing)

TINA: God, this only about... 80 blocks from where I got to be.

Relax. Pick out a tape, play some music.

I told you an hour ago I got to go home.

I got to take my mom to the beauty parlor.

Here. Want to take a cab? Here, I'll pull over.

You can take a cab, you're so late for everything.

I'm not getting out in Zulu land.

Then relax. It's only ten minutes out of your way.

Half hour.

Shut up.

(laughs)

(bell dings)

Play a little music.

-How you doing, Marty? -Hey, Mr. C.

He's going into the office.

Out comes the package.

Get in the car.

Come on, get back in the car.

-Stand still. -(tires screech)

-Still! I'm a police officer. -Hold it right there.

-You hump. -Hands up.

Come on.

Nice job.

ANDY: Yes. Yes, he does.

He's got several witnesses. We got all kinds of witnesses.

No, we don't have any film.

Yeah, I'll hold on. How do you like this?

Police officer catches a little baby coming right out of the sky like that

and TV network won't have nothing to do with it

'cause if there ain't no film it's like it never even happened.

Admiration of fellow officers, Robert.

It is the only rock our pride stands on with any assurance.

Admiration and PR talents.

Officers, Mr. Monroe's lawyer awaits your 317.

I'll take it.

Andy, Andy, hey, what's this?

What?

NFL receiver catching a baby.

(laughs) That's funny, J.D.

Line two, Henry.

Thanks.

Goldblume.

Steve who?

Steve Merkur?

From Clinton High School?

-Lieutenant. -Chief.

No, No, I'd love to.

Are you in town?

Renko, Evening Trib, line four.

See there?

Print media still has a sense of news priority.

Andrew J. Renko, Hill Street station.

It's a zoo there, Frank.

He's had one or two race incidents, minor.

Now suddenly he's got Blacks riding with Black,

whites with white, every damn unit in the place is a powder keg.

They call him Captain Taco.

Half the men at Polk Avenue call him Captain Taco.

-Have you talked to him? -No, I want you to talk to him.

Stan is ready to go in,

but we need him there tomorrow or it won't make sense.

Look, Frank, the idea is I go in with the vice platoon.

I appear to be overseeing the vice platoon's activities,

but really I'm troubleshooting with the precinct's Blacks.

You're taking over Ray Calletano's precinct.

Worst case. My intension is to help him right it for himself.

Chief, I don't have enough facts about the whole situation.

I just gave you the facts. We've got a runaway precinct.

Look, Frank, just get Ray to sit down with Stan.

The three of you, have a lunch.

I won't ask him to relinquish power.

I swear, Frank, that this is not a plot to hose Calletano.

But a cop race war on page one will be devastating.

You've got the ghetto. Your precinct will suffer worse than anyone's.

Henry.

Would you see if you can find Ray Calletano for me, please?

Thank you, Captain.

None of us wants to see Raymundo with a lot of brown burrito on his face.

This is sartorial change of pace, isn't it, Frank?

Uh, Joyce sent all my suits to the cleaners.

Divorce. (imitates gunshot)

The great equalizer.

Al, you look weird with a mustache.

Makes you look like a terrorist.

I don't know, maybe an exterminator.

It's amazing. It's a classic.

Hey, nice bust, Officer.

That's the understatement of the day.

Captain, Phil Gresham, IAD.

-Got a minute? -Not really. Urgent?

Uh, I suspect B&E involvement of one of your men.

-How so? -Well, the cop in question

has busted several individuals over the past ten days,

all of whom, while they were in the joint, had places broke into.

-Who's the cop? -Lieutenant Norman Buntz.

Walk me to my car.

-Good work this morning, Bobby. -Thanks, Captain.

Officer Hill, I have some folks here who want to see you.

Oh, hi. Hey, little burger.

-This little burger. -The doctor said he's okay.

Catch me up on Howard.

That was dreadful, top to bottom.

-How's he doing? -Actually, fairly well.

Six months he'll have his rank back. The June Review.

Well, I hope so. I mean, I'm certainly gonna fight for him.

If I'm on his board, you know he'll have it back.

How are things going around here, Ray?

Oh, very well. We got our new vehicles.

They are computerizing the 911s.

What about the men? Any problems?

Oh, I suppose a few. The normal.

I'm getting better at it, Frank.

I defuse instead of confront.

Why?

I'll tell you why I'm here.

Uh, Chief wanted me and you and Stan Williams

to sit down and thrash out a couple situations.

Regarding the precinct?

You know the new vice allocations?

He thought maybe Stan could come over and see if there's any problems.

But I told you, there aren't.

Could we go out for half an hour?

-Sure. -(knocks)

You wanted to see me?

-One minute, please, Frank. -Sure.

-Go ahead, Rayburn. -I'm sorry, Captain.

-Ready? -Let's do it.

-Understood, Rayburn? -Yes, sir.

Loose lips sink ships, sir.

What's it look like?

All of his Michigan Avenue statements plus the last two federal interrogations.

Right. (groans)

Why don't we say you give me the feds,

I pass on Michigan Avenue and we're finished?

(chuckles) Just a thought.

-Wouldn't it be nice to eat lunch today? -(phone rings)

(groans) Assistant DA Bernstein.

-FRANK: Hi, Irwin. -Oh, Frank.

I have been grumping for the last two hours, Furillo.

You owe me an apology.

Well, it's your lucky day. I called to apologize.

-You did? -Everybody who sees me

thinks I'm his high school English teacher, but who cares?

My wife was thoughtful enough to take my filthy,

shiny, spotted, soiled suits in, and I want to take you to dinner.

You're being facetious, Furillo.

-Fairly expensive dinner. -Okay.

I'll pick your suits up this afternoon.

-See you. -Mm-hmm. Talk later.

See, if Leah and I had been able to do that,

we would probably still be together.

Any chance of reconciliation?

She's living with a guy.

And I've got a girlfriend, so...

You do? Irwin, that's terrific.

She's very nice. Uh, she's Jewish.

Very nice.

When the divorce is final, we'll probably get married.

Come on, what do you got? Oh, is that the Damiano transcript?

My client Mr. Crespus.

He denies he said any of this and if cross-examined, will disavow.

I'd be a fly on the wall for a few days.

Then I'd try to open up some channels with the Black offices

and after that, the white ones.

-Coordinating with you, of course, Ray. -Of course.

You know, when we founded the Black Officers Coalition,

rule number one was listen to the brothers.

If I have any expertise, Ray, it's from that experience, nothing else.

-Of course. -I don't, uh,

I don't think it's Stan's intention

to interfere with your chain of command, Ray.

-Not at all. -Of course.

I understand that.

His official assignment would be vice.

Damn, it's 12:00.

I have a meeting with Lt. Morgan. Will you excuse me?

Pretty big hurry.

Captain, on this Norman Buntz thing.

I've got two more burgs confirmed.

You're telling me that everybody he collars

just coincidently gets cleaned out?

Norman, my office.

Phil Gresham, IAD.

I don't know, what?

NFL wide receiver catching a baby thrown out a window.

-(laughs) -Doesn't that joke get old?

Bobby, my man. Congratulations.

I think the joke stinks.

What, the NFL receiver?

Yeah, the NFL receiver and the baby.

-What? -You think about it.

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense, Gresham. That's real downtown thinking, you know.

Six of your low-grade arrests, Buntz. Six places robbed.

And I suppose I go rob these guys' places

'cause nobody would ever figure out this big coincidence, huh? (scoffs)

That's a real fine tribute to my intelligence, Captain.

Well, Norm, look. Let's go over the circumstances of each arrest.

-There could be a common thread. -Yeah, they're hummers.

If they're hummers, it's because your fat head division memo

about warrant executions got listened to.

That's true, Gresham. Last week we were trying

to build the body counts pursuant to the memo.

-On the other hand, Norm. -What, et tu, Captain? That it?

Norman, answer the coincidence.

I'll answer it. I'll take care of it.

I'm continuing my investigation.

I said I'll take care of it. Am I excused?

Captain, Counselor Weller for Officer Russo's suspect Cappelito.

Thanks, Howard. Come on in.

-(sighs) Would you excuse us, please? -Yes, sir.

-How are you? -Captain.

This could sound arrogant, but I don't intend it to.

Could I do you a favor?

And in exchange you'll owe my client Cappelito one. Somewhere down the line.

I should think he'd be wanting the favor now, not later.

Normally, yes. Today is special circumstances.

Which I take it has to do with the favor he's gonna do us?

Look, she slept with him, Captain.

Who? Who slept with whom?

Your cop Russo slept with Sonny.

You have proof of this?

Sonny's a creep, but in this area he doesn't lie.

So you're asking that the case be dismissed.

Do it now. Save your young cop.

Save the department the embarrassment.

And this is the favor, Captain.

I'm giving you a day to do the right thing yourself.

Mr. Weller, it must be

that you don't practice up here very often.

Or you'd be aware of the frequency

with which sexual misconduct charges brought against our officers

are used as components of criminal defenses.

Please don't be coming up here doing me any favors on your client's word.

Look, she's probably a good cop.

-But girls tend to be girls, right? -And lawyers tend to be lawyers.

So, uh, when was it exactly you say

your place was burgled, Mr...?

-Shanks. -Shanks.

Between Friday and Tuesday. I was away for a few days.

Ray, amigo.

Stand firm, Howard.

This, too, shall pass.

GRESHAM: Sergeant, going to need access to your off record bin files.

There's an informant in all of Buntz's arrests.

-Where were you? -Guy named Thurston.

You'll have to have captain or above authorization.

I asked you where you were on those days, Mr. Shanks.

I was... out.

I'll file that later, okay?

Would they treat you this way?

Would they treat any Anglo captain?

Ray, I hardly qualify as an Anglo captain.

You can joke, but believe me, I can go to the Hispanic press.

-And, Frank, I am disappointed in you. -That's unwarranted.

There's no harm in talking things out.

Don't play naive with me.

Daniels must think I'm his toy.

What he actually thinks is you have some problems over there.

Race problems? Which precinct has none? It's always just below the surface.

Well, at your precinct, they're above and they're out there.

Is this your belief, Frank?

Were you really just the innocent messenger?

-Or did you set me up? -I didn't set you up.

Frankly, until this morning,

I didn't have a clue about any of this.

On the other hand...

I found that in your coffee area. There was a stack of them.

Look, whether Daniels was clumsy

or even whether he treated you fairly, but that's a side issue.

If you're having a problem with your men, that's what a captain addresses first.

Which I am.

It may be that you need some help, Ray. Nobody likes that.

Everybody likes to think he can hang tough.

Would you help me?

I don't have the familiarity that Stan Williams has.

My help to you is to ask you to sit down with him.

I won't give up my captaincy.

Nobody's asking you to, as far as I know.

When you get a hold of him, call me.

Nelly.

A greaseball with glasses comes around here looking for me,

tell him I went looking up to his place, all right?

Will do, Lieutenant.

So what'd you do after writer school?

Well, I substitute taught a couple days a week

and then, um, I was a bartender for a while.

But you were writing all this time?

The habit.

There you go.

-What happened with it? -Well, uh, I finished a couple of books

and got a lot of letters from publishers.

And you know, I would sit up there in my room

thinking I'm doing this great thing.

That I was gonna end war. Make people cry.

And then I would get these one-paragraph computer notes

with my name not quite lined up with the rest of the letter

and I would feel so ashamed.

What kind of-- What kind of a jerk am I anyway?

But the guy who wrote you this time, this wasn't a form letter?

No, he said to come in.

So I hopped a Hound.

-Sounds good. -Yeah, it's great.

Well, I mean, who knows?

You know, you said you felt ashamed.

-Not all the time. -Yeah, but you shouldn't.

I mean, I'm looking at a guy who did what he wanted to do.

Stuck at it, took all the punishment.

That's something to be proud of.

All those times, remember, when we were at the Clinton.

We both said we were gonna be writers.

But for some reason, you did it and I didn't.

And I admire the hell out of that.

Just be careful what you wish for.

Come on, let's get you a place.

(TV playing in Spanish)

SHANKS: You're dead, man. You're dead meat.

Where's my tape machine, huh?

Hey, police! Put down the iron!

Put it down. What are you doing here, Shanks?

Didn't I just bust you? Aren't you just out of the cage?

Yeah, your damn snitch robbed me.

He rats me out then he breaks into my place.

You're the police? Oh, man, I can't believe this.

Don't make me fall down laughing with a heart attack, huh, Sid.

-He's your snitch, Buntz. -All right, get out!

Get up against the wall.

All right, turn around.

All right, now, ace, let's just say for the hell of it

that we forget about this little break-in with the tire iron,

which, with your parole, that's enough to put you back upstate for a deuce.

But if I hear one peep out of anybody

about Sid's my snitch, and I don't care how it gets out,

I'm telling people you're my snitch.

Are we understood here?

W-- what about my tape machine?

70 bucks?

-Buy one hot. -Excuse me.

Pardon me, sir. Are you arresting this man?

He promised he wouldn't do it again.

What about this meeting in the Rainbow Room? New Year's Eve.

Mr. Crespus indicates he was in San Juan.

How could he have been in San Juan?

He told six federal agents he was with defendant Molina.

I've got the tickets, Irwin. I showed you the stubs.

What you're telling me is that your client is a pathological liar.

Little late for that to be dawning on you, old boy.

Well, all I know is I have got eight pounds of interrogation

taken over four months' time

and there is about...

-(banging) -...12 pages I can use here.

What's going on out there?

No, hey! (grunts)

What do you think you're doing?

-Where you going, pal? -Shut up, you both!

-Girl, come on. Come over here. -No!

Help! He's in here!

Freeze, Tremaine.

Come on, Tremaine.

Judge Brodsky is requesting your presence in part 44.

Come on, move. Let's go.

-You okay? -Yeah.

-Irwin, you all right? -Yeah, yeah, I guess.

I'm fine. You okay?

Yeah.

Wow.

Let's go get some hot dogs.

Whatever you say, Clark Kent.

-Tina. -Yes, Captain?

-Good collar this morning. -Thanks.

No, thank you. (clears throat)

There's an allegation from Sonny Cappelito's lawyer

that you slept with Cappelito to make the arrest.

Just tell me, true or false?

-Cappelito said that? -True or false?

That slob? False.

Thank you.

I felt like a beetle turned over on its back.

Fourteen arms flailing around.

Totally uncoordinated.

It was like a fright reaction.

Come on, you were terrific.

You'd never guess I took boxing lessons in grade school.

Step, step, jab, back.

Oscar Mandel's Gym and Workout.

Toughen up the wimps.

You were never a wimp.

You know, actually you're right about that.

I was just an ordinary smart kid.

I even had hair back then.

Mm, good dog.

You're all beef.

Well, maybe you're all meat.

Mind if we stop at the dry cleaner?

-Mm-mm. Where is it? -Just up the street.

You know what I think about?

I wish that you had stuck with the DA's office.

Oh.

Why, so you wouldn't have to argue with me?

(chuckles) Not at all.

I just like working with you.

I think we work really well together, don't you?

Mm, we do.

Well, maybe we ought to go out.

Start a private practice.

-Irwin. -What?

Frank's suits.

Norman, you said you wanted bail jumpers, I made inquiries.

How did I know Lambrachis was mixed up in this crap?

And on what occasion did you inform me this was pass-along information?

Norman, all information is pass-along.

Hey, 12 names from one skell with a B&E sheet three pages long.

Anything out of line here, genius?

I mean, does this raise any flags in my drug-fried associate's fat head?

Listen, Norm, we're gonna pop Lambrachis.

-Calm down. -Yeah, we better pop him, Sid,

'cause I'll tell you, if I get one little finger jammed up

on account of this, you got a whole arm in serious danger.

All right, Norman, listen, I want to go on record with this.

You did not inquire my source on this.

Oh, shut up, toad brain.

Norman, please. Come on.

-(stammers) Don't compare me to a reptile. -Shut up!

Amazing day, huh?

It's had its surprises.

Yeah, I meant the weather, actually.

Amazing weather for October.

Yeah. If it stays nice for the weekend we're going up to Lake Kern.

Frank's brother has a boat up there.

Martha wants me to go leaf watching on Sunday.

-Martha's...? -The woman I'm seeing.

Martha. Marty.

I like the name Martha. Nice, old-fashioned.

-Joyce. -What?

(sighs)

What's wrong?

Nothing. (chuckles)

Nothing's wrong.

(chuckles)

Joyce, I just want to say...

I just want to say I don't want to start a law firm with you.

(mumbles)

Actually, I do, but that's not it.

I'm getting divorced.

My life is kind of free again.

Before I know it, I will probably be getting remarried.

But somewhere in here,

my heart has got to say something.

For once in my life, it has got to say the truth.

The Dodgers belong in Brooklyn.

Just kidding. (laughs)

Actually, that's true, but that's not it.

(chuckles) Irwin, are you okay?

(laughs nervously)

Joyce, I've had a crush on you since I don't know when.

Or I do know when. Since the day I met you.

I just--

I don't expect anything to come of it.

I don't expect us to run off to South America together,

but I don't know what I expect.

But I have to have you know.

And I have to know something.

Do you have feelings for me?

I mean, like a crush.

If I say I love you...

You got to ask, right?

You got to ask once in your life.

These are my conditions.

No meetings which I cannot be free to attend.

No attacks on my command.

I don't intend to attack your command.

But you've got races not riding together.

Fights in the locker room.

Daily insults suggesting you are not in command.

We've got to get this stuff in the open.

Ray, I think all Stan is saying is don't handcuff him going in.

And I say don't cuff me.

You think I will not address these problems?

You're showing a lot of attitude demanding this, demanding the other.

You want me to go to Daniels,

say Ray says no, see what the chief does then?

Are you threatening me? You're going to tell the teacher?

Ray, Stan, listen.

The ingredients are simple.

Stan goes in, collects a list of complaints,

both races, nudges both parties,

preps a meeting where Stan can attend but Ray presides.

But I shall present the reintegration proposals.

-Reasonable? -(sighs)

And that's it.

Remember, the goal here is reintegration without further incidents.

(knocks)

Excuse me, Frank.

Mr. Weller on the Russo arrest is back.

Thanks, Howard.

So tomorrow?

Tomorrow morning.

-You're a stubborn man, Captain. -Tomorrow we attack the problem.

Short clock, Ray. Lit fuse.

May I?

-Oh, put those away. -They belong to Officer Russo.

So does this. Don't tell me they could belong to anyone, Captain.

We wouldn't want to do forensics on these panties.

But ask Officer Russo, would you,

if she's got a butterfly tattoo on her upper right thigh?

Ask her then give me a jingle.

Come on, Officer Hill, don't be shy.

-Let's take one more. -That ought to do it.

-Be in the Bulldog edition. -All right.

Aren't you gonna put the thing where we were like two fielders

going for it at the same time and I deferred to him?

-I deferred to him. -Got it. Got it.

-What happened? -Oh.

Couple of kids with butcher knives shoved me in here, took my $80.

And when that wasn't enough, they, uh, threw my book up in the air.

-We doing anything? -Sector alert's out,

but he doesn't want to drive around.

Right, thanks.

You know something?

-This is my fault. -HENRY: It is, huh?

Well, yeah, I mean, I fit the profile of the typical victim.

-You do, huh? -Look at my clothes.

The way I walk around like I'm lost. Like I'm daydreaming.

You know what the last thing I was thinking before they hit me?

I'm yelling at this jerk editor, uh,

"You claimed to have read the fourth chapter?

That is a boldfaced lie.

Transit police notified?

Yeah, transit and housing.

How'd it go downtown?

Oh, said this one was a little too private.

Uh, send me the next one.

Yeah, next one, five years.

You said there's other editors in town.

You know, I just want to tell you this.

I am not gonna be a victim again.

Look, I punch a hole in my pocket, right?

And I jam my hand down in there, it looks like I'm packing a piece.

Let's get some Band-Aids for your cuts.

They threw my manuscript down and it is my fault, you know?

It is my fault!

You know, Sidney,

this first bunch I gave you was a lost leader.

ten bucks an address.

Now I'm getting slightly insulted.

I'm handing over wanted felons.

You're handing over wanted nobodies, Fred.

Which I happen to be splitting the take with you on.

-Don't make me herniate. -I get 20 a head. And what else?

You see, you haven't been equally forthcoming with me.

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

You got a lot of toys around here, Fred.

These all for your personal use?

Or could it be that you gave me those addresses

so that you could rob those guys' places when they were inside?

FRED: You're sick, Sid. You got bolts loose.

Uh-huh. Then you better treat me fair and square

'cause you could wind up in a cage yourself.

Now that's stupid.

Hey, don't misunderstand me.

I didn't mean as a threat of arrest.

I was simply proposing a split of profits,

which, okay, I can see you're opposed to.

This is a bad situation Freddie.

FRED: What are you, a moron?

You think I'm a two-bit snitch like you

who works on ten bucks a pop, huh?

This is a bad situation, Freddie.

-Police, freeze! -Freeze, police. Freeze, police.

You police, freeze.

(laughs) You don't think I'd shoot him, huh?

Get two goons for the price of one?

-Norman! -NORMAN: Of course I'd shoot him.

Go on, ask him.

Hey, Sid, you finally prove yourself to be the kind of scum I like to shoot?

-No! -Yes.

Come on, Lambrachis. This is stupid, huh?

A gun against a knife?

What do you think you are?

All right, now get rid of the knife. Come on.

Up against the wall. Come on, come on.

You know what ticks me off, Freddie?

-All right. -I paid you good money.

And you expose me to the disdain of my coworker.

Somebody's gonna do you, Sid.

Uh-uh, Freddie!

Whoever it is, I'm sending him on you.

You laugh, but somebody's gonna do you.

-Ha ha! Ha ha, Freddie! -Somebody's gonna do you, man!

May 9, Mid-Hudson Correctional.

Interview with Agent Tim Farrell.

Dr. Robert Borgesian present.

There's no boobytraps in it? I can use it?

It's yours.

So, we're done.

We're done.

Joyce.

Irwin, what you told me before.

I never suspected. Never knew.

Anyway, if you ever--

even if I go get married to Martha...

Or we'll start a law firm.

But if we do, no affair.

Uh-uh, no matter what.

My old mentor McReynolds always said,

-"Your pens here, your pencils there." -(laughs)

You going to need Mr. Crespus tomorrow?

Jury selection rest of the week.

Okay, that ought to about do it.

Irwin, you were terrific today

-with that guy, the escaped prisoner. -Oh, pshaw.

Anyway...

You're a good man, Irwin.

I got to go up to Hill Street.

It's none of my business, but, uh...

I won't tell Frank.

-Damn. -What?

His suits.

Uh, Frank, Ray Calletano called.

He said, "Gracias, compañero."

Is that what he said or is that your translation?

Actually, he said, "Tell Frank thanks."

Uh, Captain, listen, I got this robbery straightened out.

-I'm notifying the headhunters. -What the hell was going on?

The burglar was feeding my snitch names. Snitch was passing them on to me.

And the burglar would then go in.

Could we be a little more careful with our snitches, Norman?

Believe me, this guy is on probation.

-Captain Furillo. -Officer, come on in.

I'll wait for IAD's verification of findings.

-If they close it, I'm satisfied. -Okay.

Mr. Weller came back, Tina.

His client says you have a tattoo of a butterfly on your right upper thigh.

His client's quite a pig, isn't he?

He also presented underwear

and a bottle of hand lotion which he claims are yours.

Sounds desperate enough.

Do you have that tattoo?

Come on.

You can tell me yourself,

but if the answer is no, I'm gonna have the matron verify.

-Melvin. -Yes, Captain?

Could you locate Mrs. Bridge for me, please?

Right away, Captain.

This is getting a little weird.

You said you didn't sleep with Sonny Cappelito.

The idea was for me to go out with him, right?

The idea was for me to turn him on enough

that he would talk to me.

Now everybody's shocked.

"You didn't sleep with him?"

I take it you did.

Are you telling me, Captain,

with all the women cops going undercover to catch guys,

that they never sleep with them?

Is that your understanding?

That they sleep with the suspects and then lie about it?

If it doesn't go to trial, it doesn't come up.

Answer me.

I don't know what people do.

Yes.

Sure, of course they do.

And that's what you were planning to do?

-Do you want to hear this, Captain? -I want the truth.

Yes, I guess so.

I want the case dismissed.

Captain, this is the Amtrak burglary.

Dismiss the case. Get Cappelito out of here.

What if I--

I don't know, just tell the truth then?

Lawyer asks, I say yeah.

Sure, I slept with him. Why not?

So what? What was I supposed to do?

Did you ever have a case go to jury trial?

No.

Then you don't have any real idea

how a lawyer can put a policeman on trial instead of his client.

Not exactly.

Do you have any notion what a jury would think

of a cop who slept with the defendant?

Maybe they'd just think at least she's honest.

For openers, they'd think she's a cop who went against policy.

They'd think she's a cop who violated regulations.

She cut one corner, maybe she cut a lot of others.

Captain Furillo, I'm just trying to do what you said.

-I thought you said to tell the truth. -Kick him.

That's all I want.

And your report on my desk by 9:00 a.m.

(door slams)

Norman, I have received a death threat.

Not from me, you haven't. I'm typing mine up now.

Come on, Norman. Look at it.

Found it under my door.

I-- Norman-- Norm--

Can we talk privately, please?

(sighs)

-(toilet flushes) -So what do you want, a bus ticket?

No, I don't want a bus ticket.

I like this town. I like this line of work.

Which, by the way, I happen to think I'm quite good at.

I'm just asking for a little protective custody.

-So how about Michigan Avenue? -Oh, ha, ha.

I could stroke out laughing, Norm.

Come on, Sid, one lousy death threat, huh.

I mean, these guys that got robbed are low rent.

They ain't gonna off you. I'll send a patrol by your house.

Oh, great. And that's not gonna point a big floppy pointer

-right at yours truly? -So what the hell do you want, huh?

Norman, I need 24-hour, around-the-clock protection.

Yeah, well, how you gonna get it?

Well, I was thinking on a temporary basis, of course,

I could move in with you, Norman.

-Move in with me? -Yeah.

Get 'em while they're hot. Exploits of Robert Hill.

-What page? -Don't know, I haven't looked yet.

Right, you got it.

Bite of Bengal, 8:30.

Okay.

Nice hotel.

In one day he gets his manuscript rejected,

then he gets robbed of all his dough.

And I still look at him and think he's the one who took the right path.

And he thinks everything he's done is wrong.

I mean, he gets robbed, he thinks it's his fault.

He's not a Jewish fella, is he, Henry?

No, Howard, he isn't.

Cappelito's gone. He's history.

We'll get him again.

Do you want me to transfer, Captain? You want me to quit?

Uh, to be honest, I'm not sure where you're headed.

For now, I just want your report on my desk.

Because I don't know if I can work for you.

I don't know if you can either.

I'm sorry I disappointed you.

Tina.

My opinion, minimum,

you're pretty inexperienced in some areas.

Maybe.

But I'm not a hypocrite.

The department set me up to use my sex.

And then when I use it, you all freak.

I cannot believe that a story as big as this one

where a police officer or any individual catches a little baby

falling out of a high window and saves the baby's life

but don't have nothing more than two columns about it

at the bottom of page 37. What am I gonna do about that?

Probably because you didn't have a picture.

(chuckles) Gonna start carrying a Polaroid in the unit.

Tell me about it. I captured an escaped con today.

Nice going. Bring your memo book and all accompanying paperwork tomorrow.

-Irwin. -Frank.

-You and Joyce done? -Done.

I'll be there till midnight, but she's done.

Frank, Joyce called while you were downstairs.

Kiyoto at 7:00 is fine.

And you got taken to the cleaners, but don't panic.

Norm, the captain's looking a little country club there, isn't he?

Guy's good at what he does. But he dresses like a real loser.

Come on.

Look, we're gonna have one rule, all right?

You feel the need to pass any gas, you go out in the public corridor.

-Hi. -Hi.

-Sorry I'm late. -It's okay.

-What was that message? -Here.

A suit? Two suits? What is it, my birthday?

From McCauley's. Not bad.

Frank, remember just after we met, something that happened?

Something that happened?

To your suits. With the dry cleaners.

Four of your suits were burned.

Uh-huh, sure.

This time, all of them.

-All my suits? -Except these two.

Well, they were stained anyway.

(laughs)

How was your day?

Fine. Irwin caught a crook.

And we're finished.

IRWIN: I live a crooked life.

My body goes in one direction,

my heart another.

Joyce, I hope in a longer life to come,

we're much closer.

(chuckles) If not sooner.

Larry Bird.

-(thumps) -Swish.

Three-pointer.

(phone rings)

Hello.

Hi, Martha.

(indistinct chatter)

(siren wailing)

(indistinct radio chatter)

Sorry, Stan Williams was coming.

I wanted you to be here.

-It is racist. -What happened?

Mahoney and Grich failed to backup Brown and Freeman.

Freeman got shot.

Nobody backed him up.

You tried to get me killed, sucker!

Hold it, Brown! Hold it!

Hey, stop it!

Stop it!

(clamoring)

It's all blowing up.

Stop it!

(punches landing)

(closing theme playing)