Original subtitles

Duce! Duce!

national socialist in Nuremberg

53.000 young men and women came from everywhere in the Reich

to witness to the Fuhrer the firm faith of the Germany of tomorrow

- Luigi, is the political secretary here? - Yes, in the first rows. - Turn it off!

Excuse me, Don Carmine, but...

The Duce attends the parade in the Avenue of the Empire

of the 450 members of the Hitler youth, visiting Rome.

And he opens the parade, in perfect martial style,

of the 26,000 Avanguardisti

and the instructors of the Opera Nazionale Balilla

- Excuse me again, Don carmine. - Shh!

The two great nations, which, renewed and strengthened

by the genius and the will of the Fuhrer and the Duce,

became leading forces in the history of Europe

to preserve the basis of its thousand-year old culture

and to claim the principles of order and justice

in a degenerate world.

So, what’s up?

The mayor, Don Salvatore, wants you to go to his house, now.

- Right now? What does he want? - I don't know, he said it's urgent.

- Fine, you can go. - Can I go? - Yes, go away! - Excuse me.

- Stay here, I'm going to Salvatore's. - Couldn't he come to you?

- But he's the mayor. - And you are the political authority.

Margherita, shall we argue about who's more important here in the theater?

The profession of faith of a farmer from the cheering crowd:

"After God, He comes. God gives us bread, he preserves and defends it"

summarizes with rare instinctive strength the feeling of the whole country.

The Italian population...

will then have the bread...

necessary to its life!

But even if it were missing, . .

We would never, and I mean never...

ever yield to ask for any help from the so-called...

Engineer, start the engine!

Farmers, let the threshing begin.

While the threshing machine sings its song,

the Duce, bare-breasted and experienced thresher, starts working.

Over an hour lasts his hard work. 1763 pounds of good wheat.

The specific weight is 82 and 83 kg/L.

Dad, why does everybody have a shirt except the Duce?

Shut up!

From the tenacious activity of the farmer from Ferrara: Ovidio Five...

- Good evening, Commandant! - Hey!

- Oh, Mrs. Rosa. Where are you going? - Good evening.

I'm going home. My husband was urgently called by the mayor.

- Him too? So he gathered the Cabinet. On a Sunday! -Yea.

Teresi', go and buy me a postcard. And don't run!

When will I see you?

I could go to Lecce to the dentist. The day after tomorrow.

- Yes, that's good for me. - For me too. - Here is the postcard.

- Fare the well. -Say hi to Mrs. Margherita from me. -I will. -Good-bye.

I told you not to run! If you do things in a hurry, they won't come out well.

Gentlemen, this is what's happening.

My cousin, Aunt Enrichetta’s son. You know him, right?

The one employee by the prefecture in Taranto.

Today he sent me a letter which is really alarming.

It would be alarming if there were reasons to feel threatened.

Salvatore, can you make up your mind?

If you don't interrupt me, I'll get to the point.

"October 23, 1937, 15th year of the Fascist era. "

“Dear cousin, my ulcer is getting better“... no, this is not...

Here it is!

I want to inform you that the Party sent an Inspector from Rome

to conduct a political-administrative investigation in your municipality.

Good!

About time they remembered about us!

Well, I meant...

“I suggest you take due precautions, since he will come incognito, "

"if he's not there already, as I presume. "

"Romualdo’s plaster cast was removed, and he resumed playing violin... "

Well, there are family matters.

Gentlemen, this is the news.

- An inspector, incognito? - Yes. But why?

If an inspector from Rome comes here, there must be a reason.

Maybe a political reason.

"Political-administrative investigation", as your cousin says.

This has never happened in many years.

Maybe it's a reporting. In the district there are more backbiters than cuckolds!

Don Aurelio! Don't start with defeatism! Ours is a healthy district.

Yes, but coming here incognito shows a lack of trust.

No investigation can threaten who has a clear conscience, like us.

- Of course. -Of course. - However... -However, what?

Nothing, but if an Inspector "wants" to find something wrong, well...

We are gentlemen. If he is, too...

Would you like a cup of coffee?

- Why trouble yourself? - No problem. - Thank you. - You're welcome.

Mrs. Nunzia, time goes backwards for you!

Maybe! Any nice shoe ends up like a boot.

- Not to you! You're too nervous already. - I would be nervous?

Don't be silly as usual! It's you who get on my nerves, with that damned radio!

- Even the radio annoys him! - Nunzia's coffee is something else...

to laugh...

- How can you do your homework with the radio on? - What homework? I was playing!

- And your homework? Ignorant! - But dad, he's finished already.

What's wrong with you? - With me? Nothing! What should be wrong?

Go open the door. What are you waiting for? Someone rang!

She reads, the literate!

- First I let it boil... - OK, now leave us alone, please.

A bit of politeness, Salvatore!

He always vents his nervousness on that poor child!

What? Me nervous? Damn it!

- I'm extremely calm! Go, dear. - Good evening!

- Saverio, a cup of coffee? - Thanks.

No, his heart is weak. And even if he wanted some, don't give him any!

I did ad you told me, I ran to the hotel.

I sent him there to see if any foreigner had arrived.

- Well? -At the "Moon Inn" nobody arrived.

Neither at the "Central Hotel“. Nobody, except... What's his name...

One must pull the words out of him. Except?

Except Dr. Fame, the specialist in hernial girdles.

- Oh, so he's here? Er... and who else? - The guy of the Perugina.

They don't count! They come always. No stranger?

No, nobody. Only a certain...

Omero Battifiori, a guy who arrived today from Rome.

From Rome?

- "Ciarea madamin". Is that how you say it? - Did you find everything ok with you room?

All good. The bed squeaks and hot water comes out instead of cold one.

I hope you're not one of those customers who always complain.

That guy really looks like a rat!

No. Even Starace incognito looks like a nobody. But with his uniform...

- I saw the poster. - yes, there's theatre, but it's tomorrow.

But a man who wants to meet a pretty woman like you, where should he go?

What should I say? My husband came up to Turin!

Anything closer? How do singles have fun at night, in this place?

If you came here to have fun, you got the wrong town!

There's not even a casino? - No.

- Night club? - No. - Amusement park? - No.

- Pool? - Yes, there's a pool hall.

See? It seemed there was nothing, and there's even a pool hall! Where is it?

- At the Union Club, in the square. I'm not sure they'll let you in. - Me?

You don't know who I am! See you.

Pool is an excuse to go to the Union Club.

Gentlemen, it's clear now. It's really him.

Here is what I found in his room: a list of names.

A black list that he brought from Rome. Unfortunately we're all on it.

- Even I? - You're the first on the list.

"Aurelio Bitetto, school principal. "

“Salvatore Acquamano, mayor. "

"Carmine Passante, political secretary. "

“Giulio Cariddi, hospital manager. "

- "Nicola De Bellis, consultant for streets and gardens. “ -How am I involved?

- Aren't you part of the Cabinet? - Yes, but I don't deal with money.

- What are you trying to say? - That I'm not involved in politics.

Well then, I have never trafficked in flowers! -Well said!

And what about the textbooks affair? And what about medicines?

Shh! Damn this habit of us Italians! Always talking!

- You can thank your wife. - My wife? What do you mean?

- Never mind, it's better if you don't get me started! -Be quiet.

Why don't we talk instead of that new part of the hospital which was never built!

Then, if we put it this way, let's talk about the airport too!

Let's not start again with the airport!

Hey! Gentlemen!

Do you think this is good? Among us?

Leave these things to the ignorant mass. How does the saying go...

- "Voice of the population, voice of God. " - Don Nico', you're getting on my nerves.

- But I thought... - You thought wrong!

- Aren't we gentlemen? - That's what I'm saying!

Exactly.

- So what do we have to worry about? - About nothing! Absolutely nothing!

Here goes "Negus" with his new suit. It must be the cloth he won at the raffle.

So, you're from Rome...

Who, me? Sorry, I was distracted.

- Yes, from Rome. - Baron, the gentleman is from Rome.

"Caput mundi"! They make such good sweets!

Of course!

I've been there a month, in 1918,

coming back from the war.

Since then Rome has changed a lot.

Yes, I know.

Now there is lmpero Street, and Mussolini forum.

Yea. There's Palazzo Venezia...

- That was there earlier too. - Yes, but it was empty!

Yes, yes. Good one!

Here goes "The Pope“ with his wife.

- The Pope? -Here we all have a nickname. -Oh, in Rome too.

There's a professor who always drinks, and we call him a "quart of wise".

- Well, you sure are lucky. -Why? - You live in Rome. - Ah.

There you can breathe new air, heroic air, huh?

- Sometimes one can go and hear the Duce. - Always. Every time he talks.

You didn't spin it enough.

Nine points! And two before, eleven!

- Dear professor. - Good evening.

- Would you like some coffee? - Thanks.

- Angeli', a coffee for the professor. - Ok, Baro'. -Please have a seat.

- Every time? - Yes. - Well, of course.

You receive the red postcard and you have to...

No. I go by my own will. Just like you'd go, if you lived in Rome.

Last week did you hear his speech on the way back from Germany?

Well I was there, in Venezia square. When he said...

"The goal of the Axis Rome-Berlin is only one:

peace among people worthy of this name."

What can I say?

I felt a thrill down my spine.

Me too!

Excuse me, since you are from Rome.

- Tell me. - How far is Arenula Street from Venezia square?

I'm not sure, 200-300 meters.

We weren't too far off, huh?

- Why? - Nothing. The newspapers says that a balcony fell in Arenula street!

Here come the "big forks". What a honor. Who should we thank?

We were passing by and I said: "Let's go and visit our intellectuals. "

Since they don't come and visit us.

- What are you doing here? - I came in...

For the political exiles it is forbidden to enter in public places.

- Professor, these are the rules. - Yes, but... - Go away!

- Wait, professor. - Excuse me. -Go ahead.

This is not a public place, but a private circle.

A nest of coward anti-Fascists, you mean.

And I can tell you that if it were for me, this place would have been closed already!

It's past 7 pm, and you should be home before sunset.

- Why all this zeal, all of a sudden? - It's probably because of me...

Until yesterday everybody was ok with you coming here for a coffee.

Even indulgence has its limits!

It is our duty to defend our nation from whom,

with the pretext of a coffee, is plotting against it!

Is that right, comrade?

I'm asking you.

To be honest... the professor came in a second ago.

Not only he didn't plot, but...

he didn't even talk at all.

Well then, if you say so.

The secretary means that we must believe you, since you are an eyewitness,

and a stranger, moreover.

- May I introduce myself? Omero Battifiori. - Salvatore Acquamano.

- Thanks, good evening everybody. - Good evening, Professor.

A while ago, when I said... well, I didn't know.

Everybody has their own ideas. So I'll say bye like we do in Rome.

"See you"!

- Are we doing Spring cleaning? - Maybe is coming the Duce.

- As if he would come here! - But last month he was in Ragusa, Sciacca.

BETTER TO LIVE...

Better to live like the cuckold Don Nicola than with our misery.

- Go away, fat ball! - Have a good evening.

- Go to city hall, find the plastic model of the housing project. - Which one?

- The one I made 3 years ago for the prefect. Put it on my desk. Hurry. - Ok.

- "History does not respect unarmed countries. " - I had never heard it.

Well, you know, he comes up with a new one every day...

Where are you going? This is a transit street. Go away!

"I prefer a country with less artworks and more flags taken from the enemy. “

- Nice line! - It may be nice, but where can I find a wall long enough?

"The rabbit wool is the wool of the Italians"

- We have to cover this. - Why? - There has been a circular about this!

I mean, pairing rabbits to the Italians! Are we kidding?

- Well? - What are you doing? Come out!

- We came to get Tommasi'. - Why, what's he done?

- Nothing, the usual preventive arrest. - Thank God, I was scared.

But it's still 3 days to October 28!

These are the orders. Hurry up, it's cold!

Damn it! And then one shouldn't get a rifle?

Shut up! it's for these words that they call you a subversive. Get dressed!

- Want a glass of wine? - No, thanks, not when I'm on duty.

- To go out which way should we go? - Go through the country.

- 2 miles? - Orders from the mayor.

- He says that the alleys are a shame. - And he remembers only now?

- So he buries us? What a fucking system! - Don't worry, it's only for a day or two.

Here, Saint Nicholas will protect you. Pray to him.

Saint Nicholas already knows the grace I want.

If he won't grant it, it means that he too is on the other side.

- Hey, Tommasi'. - Hey, Pachialo'.

I know why: my term is almost over, and they don't know if they'll re-elect me.

- So the inspector came for you? - Yes. I am the political secretary.

- Even dad's medallion? - You forgot we gave our gold to the homeland?

- This guy wants to have me exiled! Exaggerated! -Yea, exaggerated.

For a few flowers you picked in town hall's garden?

A few flowers? I make funeral wreaths for the whole province!

By this time you should be mayor, not dealing with wreaths!

But you are what you are.

Of course! I'm in idiot! A wimp. What more?

A dissolute, that's what you are!

My money is not enough! You gotta steal it from the school to maintain prostitutes!

If they fire you, I'll be happy!

- Nobody's going to tire me. - What if they find out about the airport?

It was the aeronautical committee that picked my land.

Of course! He bought the whole committee! And now you get involved because of him.

Yes, but the funds for the rural houses? And for the livestock increment?

How did we get our car?

You even went to Rome on foot for the Duce.

Who didn't want to see you and you even got flat feet.

Rosa,

the whole town says that it's you who sent me to Rome, to be with Don Carmine.

I don't care about what this town says! I don't have to account to anyone!

- To me, yes! - Damn! One of these days...

- Ouch! - What's up?

My tooth aches! One of these days I'll have to go to the dentist.

- Good night. - Good night.

- Here, I made a warm brick for your feet. - Drink, ifs good for you.

All three of us will end up in a street.

- They can't accuse you, you're not on the list. - I know.

- You never took advantage of anything. - I know.

- For a few cents you run everywhere from morning to night. - I know.

So why are you scared?

Dear sisters, when such important people come, we should all be scared.

Be happy that I'm bigger than you and I can't touch you.

# What a crap, what a crap, everywhere is full of trash! #

- Di Gennaro. - Here! - Your composition was the best.

Lets' do this, since he doesn't know you.

If he reads a name at random in the register,

whatever names he calls, you stand up and read your composition.

- So if he calls someone else, I have to stand up? - Yes.

- And if he calls me? - You answer anyway, silly!

Every cautious and wise man must take care of his future.

Our Duce takes care of us Italians.

Yes, but as the saying goes: "Help yourself, to get the Duce's help!“

Our motto is: "Better an insurance without accidents,

than an accident without insurance. "

Yes, I'm familiar. That's a quote by Mussolini, right?

No, by one of our advertising experts.

Come in!

I made you come here to to introduce Omero Battifiori.

From the Insurance Department in Rome.

- My pleasure. - "Insurances are the bread for tomorrow. "

- Is this also by the advertising expert? - No, this is by Mussolini.

Ah, right.

I leave him in your hands. Explain to the kids what advantages does...

- The Balilla policy offers! - Precisely! I leave you in good hands.

Good indeed! With a teacher like this, I'd still be in elementary school.

Go ahead. My respects.

Leave it to me!

Hello?

So then?

- He says he's an insurance agent. - Of course, he's incognito. -Right.

- Ask him when he's going away. - Shh. -He didn't say.

When the visit is over, call me back.

Gentlemen, things are going well.

We all have to play his game and pretend he's an insurance agent.

We have an advantage: we know who he is, but he doesn't know that we know.

- One to zero! - Exactly!

As sure as my name is Salvatore Acquamano,

for Christmas I will. . Indeed, we will,

send a demijohn of oil to my cousin in the prefecture.

You wish to call someone?

I don't know. Who should I call?

Anyone, after all, they're all good.

Coletti Andrea.

Sit down, you. He called Coletti.

Let's hear: how did you expound the theme I assigned this morning?

"Theme: what would you like to say to our beloved Duce?"

“Elaboration:

I would tell him:

Duce,

if, in the evening, my mother doesn't pray for you,

I feel like an orphan!"

Very good. If he goes on like this, he'll get far.

Yes, I must admit: These kids are a great satisfaction.

Let's hear another one: Petruzzelli Giovanni.

"Topic: what would you like to say to our beloved Duce?"

"Duce, if my mother... “

One, two, three!

# The stone whistles, the name resounds, of the boy from Portoria. #

# And the courageous Balilla stands as a giant in history. #

Did you see our young soldiers?

They have an advantage. At that age one learns everything faster.

- I'm sick of this! - Me too! - Me too!

Come on, it's easy. There are buttons, like in pants.

Why are you crying? You should see how cute you look with the mask.

Well, I wouldn't say cute.

There.

Yes, maybe he was cuter with the mask on!

- May I? - Freeze!

A soldier must never let go of his rifle!

Good! Now give it to me for a moment.

A rifle must be thrown, not handed!

My compliments!

You're a true Balilla.

But you should also know that a rifle must be always cleaned.

Wake up, young man, wake up!

Yes sir!

The 5th year students are the best, but today they're not here.

This way they'll never learn. The swinging is wrong.

See? This is the grasp.

Surely, you're good at it.

I get DY-

Third place at the Fascist games in Rome.

Rome on the phone!

Rome called. Oh my God!

- Thank you very much, Madam. - You're welcome.

Hello?

Mrs. Battifiori? It's the police commissioner of Bari.

Your son is in jail, he killed someone who didn't want to insure himself.

Mom, it's me. Don't you recognize me?

No, each time you change voice.

So, when you hear a voice that's not mine, ifs me.

I'll be back soon.

I got a dozen names from the porter. I bet I can insure them all in two days!

I'll be back after tomorrow, the 27th, just in time for the salary.

Ah! Please iron my black shirt, the 28th I'm going to listen to the Duce.

I'll take you with me, aren't you happy? Old? But if you're only 23!

So I'll pick you up later and I'll take you out to dinner. Like two sweethearts.

- Sorry. - Please. - Say hi to the Countess of Lavarone.

- Omero says hi, Adeli'! - Thanks.

My son, you're completely crazy. Your beloved dad always said that.

"Clotilde, we got a crazy son!"

What? Yes, Mom, I sent you a little kiss. No Miss, I won't double!.

Bye mom. Don't go out every night to dance with men!

Bye!

- It's pointless to insist. -The guy from Rome is coming. - Send them out.

But listen,

- we've always payed the rent, right? - But now you have to find another house.

But how? We're also unemployed.

Go and volunteer in Spain, they'll pay you 2000 lire.

- Why should my sons go? - Go yourself, I just came back from Africa.

That's my house, and now I need it. Saverio, see them out.

- This way, Don't be loud. - Why are you so rude?

- Is anybody in? - No, go ahead.

Thanks a lot.

Come.

As if we didn't know that he wants to rent to the brothel's owner!

- One of these evenings, he won't make it home. - Please be quiet! Hush!

My questions might seem indiscreet,

but when submitting an insurance policy, we want to know everything on the insured.

As the saying goes: "life, death and miracles".

- It's a bit dusty. - Yes, yes.

So, fire and theft... What is your yearly income?

Well... as you know... mayors don't have an income.

I know, but you own... a property of...

. . 495 acres.

Yes.

Well, but said like that...

495 acres seem...

such a big thing. Then, in the end,

it's a poor, arid land.

Don't be modest, you're a rich man! Let me say it.

Well, the little I have, I earned it.

Ha! With sweat and tears!

- It's hot. - Right, right.

What kind of car do you own?

A small car...

- A pedal car? - No! A car, a small "Lancia".

A small "Aprilia“? I'll put “small Aprilia".

Education degree?

Well...

When I was 16, my father died and I had to give up.

Then... Let's put "Junior high diploma".

No, elementary school.

Well, too bad you had to interrupt.

And... honorary titles?

None, but in town they call me...

Ah, yes! "Big Fork"!

Sorry, I've overheard it unwittingly at the Union Club.

The people at the Circolo joke, but the others call me "Knight".

- Jokingly? - No, for real.

- You abuse alcohol? - No, I don't drink, I don't smoke.

I'm like Him: "Bacchus, tobacco... “

Yes, however, He...

Oh, yes. That one, me too!

Why, not me too?

This 'bad' habit of us Italians!

By the way, children?

Yes, two. A girl and a boy.

- Oh. the girl is a teacher, right? - Yes.

- What's her name? - Elvira.

- How old is she? - 25.

She's engaged?

No. The boy's name is Vittorio.

No, the boy doesn't interest me.

I'm going to read you the form, Dr. Cariddi. So, you have done...

No! I didn't do anything!

What did you understand? This is not a police interrogatory.

- So, you've done your military service? - No, due to thoracic insufficiency.

Yes. You seem a little nervous.

- You receive a war pension... - Yes!

And how come?

Unfit for service, and you get a war pension? - Why?

I said “yes”?

- I didn't understand the question. - Oh, that's it!

He seems crazy.

Professor, number 7 has an headache. Can I give him a cachet?

What's this "cachet"?

Those small white rounds... Did you see the one in the advertisement?

- But it's called "cialdino"! - Right.

- Give him a very Italian "cialdino"! - Ok.

- Will it still be good for him? - Sure! - So give him a cialdino!

Your signature here, and it's all good.

You're looking at my references.

These are my mementos.

That's my Action Squad. They called us the "Alala".

Oh, thanks.

And that's me.

I see.

Here it's us again, the "Alala". Leaving for a punitive expedition.

You look really good.

Who are these?

Farmers on strike, at the Chamber of Work. - Ah, strikers.

And what is this?

The Chamber of Work, half an hour later.

- A fine work! - To reestablish order, it takes tough action! - Well, yes.

This is us toasting to victory.

That's Don Salvatore! He too was in the Squad?

No, he provided the trucks to disperse the strikers.

They were all his farmers.

And this? You recognize him?

It's De Vincenzi!

- Why is he...? - Then, we didn't joke around.

He refused to shout "Hail, Duce!", and I made him go around in underwear.

- Did he shout it after that? - No.

Commandant! 10 more requests to volunteer in Spain.

Go!

These youngsters are hot heads. They all want to go.

Were it for them, would be left in town only women, old people and children.

And those of the Club.

Well, of course.

You're certainly the first in the list.

No...

Not really the first.

Indeed... May I?

- I believe my name isn't on there yet. - No, ifs not.

- As I said, it's not on here. - It's not.

Salvagnini!

Salvagnini! Come here, you dummy!

I told that idiot 20 times to write my name down!

Here you go!

- Good morning, baron. May I? - Go ahead. - Thank you, very kind.

Maybe he came here to ask us to join his Party all together.

Since he is a high officer, it's better to be cautious.

Dear engineer, we use so much caution that we could export it.

I don't feel like having more troubles, just to play Don Quixote.

If only there were more Don Quixote and less Don Abbondio!

I've heard that you get up late in the morning.

You heard wrong, cause I don't get up at all.

- Oh, right. - Tell me.

- I heard that last year the hail ruined your harvest. - Yes, that's true.

- That could happen again. - Oh no!

- For, if it happens again, it means that God is really mad at me. - Right! Right...

I think you'd make more business here if, instead of the hail,

you'd insure citizens against thefts.

- Why, are there many thieves here? - Not more than elsewhere.

But the local thieves are smarter!

Think, none of them has ever been arrested.

- Here goes "Seven butts". - Who's that, the hotel porter?

It's not a nickname, it's his real last name.

Then, as a nickname, call him "Mario Rossi"!

As a local girl, you should be my guide to the beauties of this place.

- The beauties? Here, the prettiest thing is the public wash house. - No!

They told me about important public works: land reclamation, the airport...

We go out together tomorrow?

Well?

I was telling her that I would like to visit the airport. I've heard of it.

- From whom? - From De Vincenzi, and those at the Club.

Whatever say those defeatists, is not true.

Actually, they spoke well of it.

Indeed, I was surprised that they too appreciated the works of the Regime.

- Oh, really? - Yes. - Strange!

Well, there's actually nothing worth seeing, but if you're really

interested, I can drive you for a tour.

- No, thanks. - I thought you were interested.

Yes, I'm interested.

But since the young lady offered,

I wouldn't want to offend her.

You won't send me around dad, huh?

Of course "pretty teacher" put her hands on him!

# Since my love is not mine anymore... Celestial Serenade... #

- Sorry, I thought you were alone. - Be quiet!

- From our balcony we can't see anything. - Go ahead.

You see how the others do?

What’re you waiting for? That they call you?

- Ok, I'm going. - And you leave me here like an idiot?

He wants to visit the airport.

Oh, so sorry!

- And also the land reclamation works. - No!

“L killed the Ethiopians and I'm proud of it... "

"Forty years I waited and I regret it... "

"I'm just sorry that Menelich isn't here anymore... “

#They invaded my reign because I have a ring on my nose.

#1 have an umbrella slung across the shoulders, bare feet and an alarm clock around my neck.

#England doesn't want you to have a place under the sun,

#and to slow down your ambition, applies a sanction.

#If you want to go back to Geneva, you will have to accept this.

#1 break but I don't bend, I don't care about Geneva.

#And by creating autarchy, I do everything in my country.

#To build battleships I will tear down fences.

#1 'm not giving you my hand, but a Roman salute.

It I'm going to give it to you anyway. Here, get this up yours!

#Ok!#

# Black face, little Ethiopian we'll take you to Rome, free. #

# You'll be kissed by our son, you too will Wear a black shirt. #

# Black face, pretty Ethiopian. #

# Wait and hope, that the time is getting closer. #

# When we'll be next to you, we'll give you another law and another King. #

# Black face, pretty Ethiopian. #

# Wait and hope, that the time is getting closer. #

# When we'll be next to you, we'll give you another law and another King. #

# Black face, pretty Ethiopian. #

# Wait and hope, that the time is getting closer. #

# When we'll be next to you, we'll give you another law and another King. #

- Saverio! Be careful! - It is fault of these streets!

- No, it's just a small hole. - A small hole? It's a landslide!

Here, this is a colonial house. This is another one.

Over there there's the tools warehouse, that one is the cowshed.

The chicken run, the pigsty.

And here there are 30 head of cattle.

They're all dairy cattle.

They're... - No, no! Over there! - All dairy cattle. - Nice! Nice cattle!

Shall we go?

This way.

- What happened? - I don't know. - May I? - Of course.

- I'm sorry for this hitch... - I am not. On the contrary!

There they are!

- It's a trifle! The carburetor. - Please, take your time.

Let's go!

Everything is fine.

Here, this is a colonial house. That's the cowshed, the pigsty...

And here too there are 30 head of cattle. All dairy cattle!

- I see, I see. - There!

- You like? - A lot, yes.

Yes, yes! I must admit...

hall we continue? So, we can see also the other houses.

- After you. - Women and mayors first. - Thank you.

Saverio, what's going on? It stops every 300 feet, I don't understand.

- What can I do? It's the engine. - Now it's the coil.

I apologize, it's an old car.

But didn't you understand that this is a trick?

It's my trick to be alone with you.

Hurry up with that cow!

Here too 30 head of cattle. All dairy cattle!

Strange, here too a cow with a horn shorter than the other.

That's quite common, that a horn is shorter than the other.

Right, Elvira? - I don't know.

Yes, ifs exactly so! Look!

Let's go, Saverio.

Idiot! Why did you stop? The visit is over!

I know! The gas, too.

- Thank God, it's small. - I apologize, but this bastards...

- Dad, did you see how high it flew? - I saw.

- Your son? - Yes. - I've a cute brother, don't I?

It's him, who has a pretty sister. Oh, I'm sorry Saverio!

Oh, sorry Saverio!

- Is he going to land here? - I hope not. - Why?

- Er... it would mean it's got a fault. - Oh, right.

- But he's landing here. - Right now!

Shall we continue our tour?

- Let's watch the landing. - You want to? - Here it comes.

That is a small plane Caproncino CA 100.

You're an expert. To me, it just looked like a plane.

Some people, rather than airplanes, I'd let them drive carts, you think?

I'd say seaplanes.

Criminals! This is not a landing strip, this is a swamp!

They're inept and they blame the airport.

- This was constructed in a workmanlike! - This here? - Yes.

It's quicksand!

See? Even kids can land.

Yes, dad. But instead of wheels we had to use corks!

- This will teach you. - Teach what? - Everything! He's an ass!

Don't cry! Let's go.

- And this is Alberobello. - It's not very far.

11 miles, and 11 miles back that's a good bike ride!

I haven't been on a bike since when I was in the Avanguardisti cyclists.

What a wonderful man!

I saw him last year in Bari, at the Levante exhibition.

He came driving his plane. I think no woman could resist him.

Not even you?

Well, don't misjudge me. For me, more than a man, he's a symbol.

Yeah, it would be like having sex with your homeland!

These "trulli" are built stone on stone

because the Marquis of Grottalunga, in 1500, didn't let the farmers use lime.

So, if a farmer didn't pay his taxes, which were heavy,

they could demolish his house with a rope pulled by two oxes.

- Two oxes? - You know, those who didn't pay taxes. -I see.

- . . 1649, named "Guercio delle Puglie"... - Goes on for long?

- Until he gets some money. - Right away!

Here's one lira. Good job!

What were we saying?

That my wife will have to love her country in a uniform, not in a nightgown!

What's that got to? It was just to say, but...

Elvira...

These "trulli" are built stone on stone because the Marquis of Grottalunga...

- I know! - so, if a farmer didn't pay...

No, I'm paying right now!

Here. Thanks.

What a smart system, these Marquis of Grottalunga!

They would tear down the houses, worse than bandits!

If I owned one of these Trulli, I'd have set the Marquis on fire. Right?

Yes, sure.

Miss...

- Aren't you Mrs. Nunzia's daughter? - Yes, but...

Carmela! She was in service in our home for many years.

- I held her in my arms. - Lucky you who managed ma'am!

- You've become so beautiful! - It's true.

May you grow up well and healthy! Come in.

No, thanks, Carmela. Unless... you want to visit a Trullo.

Let's visit it! At least we'll avoid the kids. Thanks.

- Come on in. - Thanks. - Make yourself at home. - Very kind.

- Please have a seat. - Thanks. It's pretty here!

- Is this your husband? - No, Carmela! What are you saying?

She was upset, you could have said yes.

- Is he a stranger? - Yes. - Yes, he's from Rome.

Beautiful Rome! There's the Pope. And Mussolini, that bandit!

- What are you saying, Madam? - I remember, he killed many people.

- No, she's confusing him with the bandit Musolino. - She might be shot for that.

You're wrong. The one in Rome is Mussolini, a good person.

- He might be a good person, but he killed so many people.

Again!

- Wait a second, I'm going to get a little rooster. - Go ahead.

So you can bring it to your mother the Marquise.

I didn't know your mother is a Marquise.

Sure! Of the Marquises of Grottalunga. Once, the whole town was theirs.

- Excuse me. - Go ahead.

Elvira, I am really sorry for earlier. I didn't know...

- Of what? Shall we go? - Why?

Since even this Trullo has been yours...

These "trulli“ are built stone on stone...

because the Marquis of Grottalunga didn't let the farmers us lime.

Mom, ifs me!

HOW' um e who",

God! If I don't joke she won't believe me.

Hallo, Frau Battifiori. This is the office of Field Marshal Gohring.

See, now you recognized me! I didn't leave, that's why I called you.

No, it's not about work. What if I came back with a girl?

A girl? Holy Mother!

Adeli', did you hear that? With all the girl who are in Rome!

Who is she? Do you know her well?

Does she have a sound standing? Beware to not get caught up!

You always say you want a grandchild. To make you one, I need a girl.

The countess is playing bridge?

No, she cleans chicory.

Come in!

Excuse me, sir. Don Nicola wants to talk to you.

Who's that?

A cuckold!

- I didn't ask about his private matters. - But everybody knows that!

- Ok, as husband he may have his problems, but as man, what is he? - He's cuckold!

See? You didn't tell me this! You know you're a backbiter?

Go on, let in this cuck... er, gentleman.

Come in.

- You probably have heard about me. - Well, a bit, yes.

I didn't want to bother you, but my wife insisted so.

You don't know her!

No, but I won't hide I'm curious.

You know what the town says?

Yes, I know.

- And what do you think? - Well...

I think it's better not to heed to backbiters.

- Backbiters? But this is the truth! - Oh!

Everybody knows that Don Salvatore is an inept, a profiteer!

- Oh! The town says this too! - Sure!

And believe me, when people talk, there's always something true.

Well, If you say so.

You see... I have to admit that my wife is always right.

- You know what she says? - What? - That I'm an idiot!

- And she's right? - Precisely!

That is, she's right when she says that I should be the mayor,

for I got what it takes.

To name one, I have a degree.

The current mayor only attended elementary school.

- You know how many children I have? - How many? - Six.

And you know why? - I can imagine.

- Exactly! To obey the Party's orders. - You did good!

- I named the last one Littorio. - Vittorio is a nice name.

Not Vittorio, Littorio, with “L“! - Great!

The Party asked for gold, and I gave our wedding rings.

It asked for copper and I gave our pots. If it asked for my wife...

I don't think we'll get to collect wives.

- I said what I had to say. - Yeah?

- Sorry for the rant, I feel better now. - That's what matters.

Anyway, don't worry, I won't tell anybody.

Well, no! - What, no?

You must tell, and to everybody!

- But why? Never mind. - What, never mind?

I want that in Rome everybody knows who is Nicola De Bellis.

You get to know these things sooner or later, just as I did.

Cover up, please.

- Good-bye. - Good-bye.

Damned spy! He spits poison at us, instead of thinking about his own home!

What a degenerate country! We should be united, supportive.

Instead one tells him who knows what, and others write anonymous letters.

But I knew it, you know? I know well this rabble!

That's why I told the hotel to deliver his mail here. And here it is!

- If nobody had talked, he'd have left. - But he's still here.

And tomorrow is October 28th!

If to the gathering come only the few usual people, we are screwed!

What?

So you had embezzled the funds for the fascist Epiphany that "hadn't arrived“!

And you trust anonymous letters?

The town secretary remind everybody that tomorrow is October 28th,

anniversary of the revolution.

The anniversary must be celebrated with the usual enthusiasm.

No desertion is allowed!

The black shirt is mandatory, and, for who has it, the green uniform.

Although unfortunately it should rain,

the umbrella is prohibited. You got that?

For those who don't have it, in the shop “ingegnericchio" in the square,

there are on sale black shirts. But only small sizes!

Gun belts, medallions, fez with fringes,

even for biggest heads!

That's it! Don't let anybody in. Everything is sold out. Close down!

I told you, there's nothing left!

If you break the window you'll pay!

Go to Mrs. lmmacolata's shop! Stay away!

Or I'm going to call the police! Everything is sold out, I said!

Come down! That's it!

If it were my fault, I'd understand. But women never looked at me.

With this nose and these ears, who would I marry? An abbess?

I understand, I'm single too. But the tax on bachelors must be payed!

With what money? I live from hand to mouth.

Now they'll take my donkey if I don't pay the arrears.

- Please talk to don Salvatore. - But that's the law!

Then he can go to hell! I'll rather eat the donkey than giving it to him!

- So you'll go to jail! Either you pay or you get married! - Fucking law!

Don Carmine! Don Nicola says that the municipal guards don't have the uniforms.

Tell Don Nicola to go get it... Do I have to do everything? And him?

- He probably went back to the inspector. - No, he's home. His wife's leaving.

- Mrs. Rosa is leaving? Where to? - To Lecce, for her teeth.

Oh, right. I forgot about that.

What now?

Saverio, . .

I talk to you from man to man.

- You maybe know that me and Mrs. R... - I don't know anything!

Yes, you know!

Between us there's nothing wrong, mind you,

just a certain liking.

No, I don't meddle!

What's that got to?

It's about doing me a favor. Saverio, you should take a note to her.

A note? What kind of note?

Just a note...

Hey! What do you meddle?

The Squadrist ribbon goes here on the cuff, not where you put it.

- Did you go to school? - Ok, I'll attach it again. - Hurry up!

- Gimme needle and thread, I'll do it. - But this way you'll miss the train.

I'm not going anymore!

- And your tooth? - It's not hurting anymore!

With the inspector here, you all lost your mind! As if he were the Duce!

And what are you doing stuck there? Hurry up!

- Given this flirt between you and him... - Salvatore!

- Tomorrow you're wearing the hat or the fez? -The fez. - But it makes you shorter!

With all my problems, you worry for these trifles!

I was saying, this flirt...

you could use it for your future, right?

Mom! Listen to how I end dad's speech.

"His word will guide his children ready to fight for Fascism and for the Duce. "

- Good job! You're such a good writer! - Yes, very good, but let that go.

I think he would be a great choice. Where would you find a better match here?

- I'm saying this for you. - And for you. - Yes, for me too. - For yourself only!

Am I her father or not?

I'm not wearing this uniform, now I'm a Balilla mosqueteer!

You're an idiot, and you'll wear it!

It's the same old story!

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to force you.

But if you too like him...

Well, I like him. If you had seen him at the gym, at the parallel bars!

Oh! 30?

It's only that a young man, moreover from Rome, should be...

within certain limits, of course...

encouraged.

If you're too intransigent,

one ends up...

giving up. And then...

Great! Fine advice you give to your daughter!

All she needs is someone in uniform, maybe with medals, and she loses her head.

- Oh, right. - Not again with the officer from Brindisi!

I liked him and we got engaged. And that's that!

Engaged! For 3 days! Then he was transferred to Udine!

If only you had encouraged him less...

- Don Salvatore! - What is it? - Don Carmine wants to talk to you.

Look. I got an idea.

The first pick axe blow of the Duce. So?

Tomorrow we too must give a pickax blow, in front of the inspector.

- And where? - An empty house. Oh, you know which one I chose?

The one you want to rent to the owner of the...

Good idea! Thank you for the preference!

What? It took me a year to get rid of the tenants, and now

you want to knock it down with pickax blows?

A pickax blow at most can destroy 3 bricks. The day after you can have it fixed.

Payed by the municipality?

Of course! Payed by the municipality!

Fine, I'll sacrifice myself!

- Stop! Go back in town. - What do you want? I go where I like.

- Precise orders: general gathering. - We gotta work in the country!

- No work, today! it's October 28th! - I'm surprised at you, a farmer like us!

It cares a lot, the land, for your October 28th! - I must obey orders.

- Let me go, my sister is ill. - You'll go tomorrow.

- She might get worse any minute! - If you go, you'll be worse yourself!

- Damn, I'll knock you with the bayonet! Go! - Let it go don't get in trouble!

- What crap is this? -They probably brought the cows too, to the gathering.

"The demonstration will have to be enthusiastic and spontaneous. "

Big families on this side!

- Ignorant! Write "Fascist group" or it seems a business card! - Ok.

- Dad! - Miss, look after the Balillas! Mark those rambunctious! Go with them.

Saverio! Take care of this mess!

Did you hear that? Get in line!

I fought and I'm a farmer.

- Shall I go with the veterans or with the farmers? - Go wherever you want!

- I got 7 children, with whom should I go? - With anyone, except your wife!

You, over there...

- Fascist merchants, where should they go? - To jail, all of! - What do you mean?

- Stop it! Oh God! Do it for me! - I'd send you to jail!

- I'm unemployed, where should I go? - Nowhere! Unemployed people don't exist!

- So I can leave? - Do as you wish!

Nobody from the "Azione Nizzarda" group?

What's that? - What do you care? Stay here and shut up.

- Where should we Forest Rangers go? - There! Can't you see them?

Saverio! Where should we go?

How rude! Goodness!

What a mess, what a noise. What a headache! - Want a “cialdino”?

- What is this "cialdino"? - A cachet! - Speak properly! Cialdino...

His word will guide our children,

ready to fight, for the fascism and for the Duce!

- Hail! - To us!

- You saw how he checks everything? - Nothing eludes him.

- But Miss Elvira is not parading? - She'll parade now.

When it's needed, it's needed, right?

These are the motorized units.

- Motorized? - Yes. Brought by truck.

5000 lire bonus to Cioccia Pasquale, for the birth of his 11th child.

Bravo!

Maybe if he had made fewer, they'd have come out better!

What've you got to chat, you and him?

Our affairs. After yesterdays deed you better shut up.

Good job! If everybody had 1 'I children, we would be 200 million of Italians!

This is the second to last? Good!

200 million? And then, where will we fit?

That's why we went to war, to have more vital space.

That's right, it's true.

Excellency!

Tell the Duce that here in Gioiavallata, lives Lo Russo Giuseppe.

Of course I'll tell him. He'll be pleased!

Thank you. - You're welcome.

- Why did he call me "Excellency"? - A habit of our farmers.

If one is dressed well,

even if he's an idiot, they'll call him "Excellency".

Oh, I see.

You're not leaving for a war, but for a crusade!

Because when they burn a Christ in Spain, the one in our church burns too!

Christ is always one! As one is the King, and one is the Duce!

Comrades, hail to the Duce!

You're leaving with the second group?

Yes.

Congratulations to the newlyweds!

See? If we got married today, we could have got the wedding price.

I know, but we were not on time. It means that we'll get married next month.

But I don't get it. After so long, you decided all of a sudden.

Heh, ifs love!

Damn that bastard!

- Can I tell you something? - I know it already, but tell me anyway.

I didn't think you'd marry one who makes 500 lire per month.

- That's what you wanted to say? - Why?

- What did you think? - Nothing, since you don't trust me...

Of course I trust you! I told you everything.

Really everything?

Well no. If I work overtime, I can get to 700, even 750.

Alright, we'll make them suffice. And then dad can help us.

- I would prefer not. - Why?

I love you...

I'll marry you even if dad...

What is it with dad?

Elvira, since...

I got here, many things about him came up.

Why do you say that?

I don't know what they told you. They're all jealous.

Poor dad, he was unlucky. He has always lived in the province.

- People like him, in Rome, you know where they are? - In Regina Coeli.

- Regina Coeli? What is that? - Nothing, a new ministry.

- Be well, Tommasi'. Say hi to your wife. -Yes. - Good-bye.

And you, next time, be quiet. Next t time don't drink.

- You even punched me. - I know, I apologize, with you and the others.

I don't like wine.

But if I don't drink, what will give me the guts to say what I think?

Hello, Doctor.

What are you doing here? Looking at the landscape?

- It's beautiful, huh? - I'd say, very uncomfortable.

- Who lives there, says it's worse. - I meant, it's pretty from the outside.

Oh, yes, from up here.

But if you take a closer look, it's very different.

- Good afternoon, Doctor. - Hello.

It's pointless to keep pumping, Doc. I'm almost dead, and you know that.

Instead, today...

since you know so much, you're doing better than yesterday!

And yesterday better that the day before!

- You start lying too? - Shut up, come on.

All done.

Pay attention, you!

Guess where it is, here or here?

- Here! - Good! Since you guessed, I'll give you the other one too. Here.

- No, don't listen to her. - But what should I tell him?

Don't listen to her!

What would it take? Do it for these children!

I said no, damn it!

- Even if I had to see you all starve! - Come on, be quiet, Menotti.

Lay down.

- What's the matter? Explain me. - My father in law never joined the Party.

But Don Carmine says that, if he wears the black shirt, they'll give us the subsidy.

Tell Don Carmine to come here and tell me personally.

And then see what I'll do to him, from my deathbed!

See? You tell him. He listens to you.

Convince him!

Come.

- Ma'am, I'm a stranger, what. . ? - The gentleman is from Rome. - Yes.

And who gives a shit?

Well, he's right.

Do you see the Duce?

Yes.

Could you tell him something from me?

Sure, tell me.

Tell him to stick it up his...

I don't know if I'll be able to.

Excuse me.

Menotti...

Maybe it's better this way.

Wear the shirt.

Anyway, it's the intention that counts, right?

Doc...

You tell me this because I'm a wretch.

But you, would you wear it?

- You talk, since you're educated. - Excellency,

we're honored by your visit.

The Duce did good things, inside and outside Italy. - Exactly.

You built streets and houses for Ethiopians, make them for us too.

- Go tell this to the Duce. - Thanks, Excellency.

For what? I'd gladly do that, but I can't. I wish!

Tell him I'm in a cave with 6 children and a donkey.

Come and see mine: 5 children, plus a mule and a cow!

Now it's Fall, and luckily we can go pick olives for the landlord.

- But winter is harsh! - I know, Madam.

- Here, drink an egg, just made. - Two apples, Excellency. - Thanks.

- The glass is clean, drink. - No, thanks. - Why? Accept.

My son, may you be blessed for the good you'll do to us!

Unfortunately I can't do anything. I wish I could help you, really.

Heh, nothing. A gentleman like you!

I would do anything, but I wouldn't know how. - Please!

Excellency, when you go back to Rome, take the Duce by the arm and tell him. .

- Me, by the arm? - Sure! Or, sign a document yourself.

In your rank, all you do is well done.

- Yes. - The Duce likes you. - Help us.

He likes me?!

Excellency, please deliver this letter.

- It's for the Duce, right? - Yes sir, Excellency.

Give it in his hands.

Thanks.

- The Virgin Mary will remember you. - Have a glass of wine.

- Thanks, ma'am, I'm teetotal. - Give a good luck kiss to His Excellency.

Omero’s darling!

Doctor...

Who do these people think I am?

It's pointless to deny it. Everybody knows that...

that you're an officer on a mission, right?

An officer on a mission?!?

Here they're more simple than in town.

And of course they told them.

But, how is that possible? But...

Me, an officer?

- This is good, drink some. - I'm teetotal!

Excuse me, . .

But didn't you come here from Rome... to make an inspection?

Me?

Who told you that?

So,..

You're not...

No!

You're not. . ?

You're really not. . ?

That's why!

At last!

- More! Drink! - It's better.

That's the way! Cheers!

Bravo!

Drink! Drink!

- It's a luck you've deserved. - You'll move to Rome with you son-in-law?

- Of course. As soon as everything is ready, we'll go.

“Big ship, big voyage"

It will be a pleasure to become friends with Lady Rachele. She's my age, you know?

He's 4 years my junior, but he looks like he's 20.

I hope you won't forget about us. My son should go to Rome.

Sure. If you need, write me. "Salvatore Acquamano, Rome".

- How about a title in front of the name? - We'll see.

- "Commandant", "Grand Officer"... - Who knows, maybe even "Excellency“.

Don't offer too much help. I don't wanna be bothered in Rome.

Sure. Who will care about these poor idiots once we move?

"Excellency"! A title that suits him like a saddle on a cow.

Don Salvatore! My congratulations. To you and your daughter.

- With my mouth and with... - Your horns! - What. . ?

- Come here a second. - What did I do? - Nothing...

- What's wrong? - You went to him to denounce me, huh?

You didn't think he'd become my son-in-law! Now you'll regret being a spy!

I didn't say anything, I swear. Don't ruin me, I have 6 children!

No, you have 6 children without being a father!

- "To live dangerously. " -No. - "The plow marks the track. " -No.

- "The sinner. " - It must be a sentence by the Duce.

- "If I advance, follow me. " - Finally! Was it so difficult?

Congratulations!

Thanks, very nice of you. Really touching.

- Gentlemen, here is my son-in-law! - Congratulations, we heard the news.

What are you doing?

A welcoming really... - Want a drink? - Yes, just a sip.

- You will have a jewel as wife. - Allow me.

- Mom. - Nice to meet you. - Omero Battifiori.

- Omero Battifiori. - Nice to meet you - May I? - But I'm the mother!

- Omero Battifiori. - He's so nice. - Mrs. Cariddi. - May I?

- What a beautiful couple! - Omero Battifiori, madam.

- You've met the secretary. - Yes, I've already spotted him.

- Mrs. Falsari. - May I? Omero Battifiori.

- Tomorrow? - Yes, tomorrow.

- Really nice. - Mrs. De Bellis. - Nice to meet you.

Come, we're playing. We mimic the Duce's sentences. You must know so many!

Of course, I write them!

- Here. Let's go playing. - What did he say?

- He said he writes them. - Really? - May be.

Don't you think he drank a bit?

- Ouch! - What's wrong? - Here is the pain again.

- I really have to go to Lecce tomorrow. - Let's hope this is the right time!

- "Book and musket." - No. Where have you seen the book?

Hush for a moment, please. Maybe I got it.

- "War is worlds only hygiene. " - Yes, that's it!

Now I'm going to do one. I need a woman. Do you mind, De Bellis?

- Go ahead! - Thanks. - Go ahead. - It's only a game.

I'm an old man, but I still like women.

- "The plow marks the track. " - Here oxes are not involved!

What is it? Say it, we're never going to guess.

“Who drinks beer, will live 100 years. "

Wasn't that an advert?

Maybe He suggested it, you know, during the Munich speech, the beer...

Then the Duce must have suggested also: "You want health? Drink Ferrochina".

Either you change head or you change father!

That's a good one!

- Let's play another game. - Quiet! - Let's play "cops and robbers".

No no...

Where are we going to find the cops, here?

Ok, but you can play the robbers. You know how to be robbers, right?

To the refreshments! Double celebration today!

Anniversary of the Fascist revolution and my daughter's engagement. Please.

Nobody liked this game. Then, everybody to the refreshments!

Let's all "eat" something!

You mind?

We open the dance? - No.

For I don't know your traditions. At least, not all.

- About that... - Let's go drink.

Elvira told me that some backbiter told you some things about me.

30?

I tell you they're jealous, provincial. They'd say anything just to...

just to send you away! Hah!

But what do I care? Don Salvatore, what do I care?

Sure, some little sins, I committed too, but who hasn't? - Who hasn't?

I mean, if at times I also sewed my own interest,

I didn't do it for myself.

- And for whom did you do that? - For my 2 children, Elvira, Vittorio...

Since Elvira is going to be yours...

Omero...

I did it for you too.

Thank God that in your place there wasn't that man who had 11 children!

- Omero, would you like something? - Sure! Let's go to the refreshment!

- Aren't you coming, dad? - Yes. - Let's all "eat" something!

I'm following you, my love.

- I'm teetotal, but I'll take a sip. - Coming late to an engagement party...

I would ask him where he went.

Well, if you wanna know, I went to visit the caves.

- The caves? - Yes.

And we were worried for him!

- Bad, ma'am. Never worry about others. - Not about others, but about you, yes.

If you wanna worry about someone, at the caves you got enough for a lifetime.

But why would you do that? Right? Why doing that?

Right? Why doing that?

If you start caring for others' misery, you end up forgetting your own interests.

Right, Don Salvatore?

Well, actually, I don't know.

Anyhow, today is a happy day and we should be happy.

Of course, be happy!

Hey. be happy you! Come on!

Don't you wet you beak too? Oh, pardon the pun!

Anyway, don't worry, as soon as in Rome, I'll tell everybody.

It's that he wants to let known in Rome that he's...

Don't worry, I'll take care of you.

The secretary is worried.

Are you afraid I'm going to reveal that you raise a new race of cattle here?

- A new race? - The racing cows!

They might be few, but they move from farm to farm very quickly.

- What do you mean? - What do I mean? Let's all "eat" something!

Everybody to the refreshment!

- Omero, what’s wrong with you? - Maybe he drank a bit too much and...

When dad sweats it's a bad sign. Are you worried about the airport?

- Course not! - You can say that you breed frogs!

Not bad as a work of the Regime!

One hand washes the other, and both of them...

Damn, what a loot!

But if you have to lend a hand to anyone, how can you do it?

You're all without hands.

They can wait all they want, those at the caves!

You're doing well, because in Italy handshake has been abolished.

To whom, the money? To us! To whom, the caves? To them!

- Omero. - Pardon, there's the ladies. - What's with you? Just this day?

Gimme that, it's no good for you. You've got an age!

Listen up...

You swiped the funds for the Befana, right?

Gotcha!

Listen, Omero... I think we can fix this without...

bothering Rome, huh?

Don't worry, I'm not going to say anything.

I'm not crazy!

First of all, in Rome probably nobody would care.

- Yes, they have other things to worry about. - More important.

And here, nothing would change anyway. Secondly,

And for this, I apologize...

I'm mortified.

I am not an inspector, as you thought, but a plain insurance agent.

500 lire per month, plus overtime, when there is.

If I went to denounce you, they would probably arrest me.

I'm not stupid!

Don Salvatore, I'm an insurance agent, that's all!

I've always said that, but you... Oh, sorry!

I'm an insurance agent!

Do you understand, now?

I understand you were scared, but to mistake me for an officer!

De Bellis!

Do I look like a high officer?

Elvira!

Excuse me.

My love, wait.

Cheers! To the newly wed!

I had so many chances with men, but I wanted a men like I dreamed!

But you said you loved me.

I still love you.

- So...? - If I married you, I'd make a mistake.

To many people, marriage is always a mistake.

No. For me it's a mistake only when you marry without esteem and respect.

Why? Just because I drank a bit?

It's not common, I usually don't drink.

Omero, I love you. But you're not the father I want for my children.

Maybe they want me the way I am. Let's let them decide, ok?

No, don't joke.

I know, you would be a good husband. You'd provide us with everything.

On Sunday, you'd take us all to have some ice-cream.

Why? You don't like ice-cream?

You see, I may be stupid, but I've always dreamed of a man full of medals.

Strong and courageous.

Ready to fight, in peace and in war, for the ideals of our country.

But do you want a husband or a memorial?

He's a deceiver, a conman! That's what he is!

We must give him a good lesson!

I am the idiot, I mistook a penny for a gold coin!

Now, that wretch will make all Italy laugh at us!

If we give him a lesson, he won't laugh so much!

- Not a wise move, he knows too much! - it'd be like adding fuel to the fire!

How could I fall for that? I don't know.

- I told you he couldn't be an inspector. - Too young, without authority.

With that weak constitution!

But if he hadn't told us...

But whose fault is it? - Not mine. - Not mine.

But somebody must have come and said "that one is the inspector. " But who?

There he is.

"Someone arrived from Rome. A high officer. "

We didn't believe that and he insisted: "it's him, I saw him."

It's perfectly on time.

Hotel porter!

Comrades! I preferred to telegraph because I don't like secret inspections.

It would have been a lack of trust in you, the live forces of the nation.

Excellency, thanks. On behalf of everybody, thanks.

I brought my wife, who had never visited this part of Italy.

- It's a great honor. - Giancarla!

Here you go, Madam. The luggage, Saverio.

There. My wife, the wife of the political secretary... - Nice to meet you.

Excellency, I allowed myself to contradict just one of your instructions.

I didn't reserve a hotel room for you.

My wife and I would be very honored if you and your wife

will accept to be guests at our household.

- What do you say, Giancarla? - I would say yes, Peppino.

Well, so be it!

Thanks, Excellency. This way.

I've heard that around here the oil is really good. Is that true?

That's not right, though. An inspector, like you, traveling in third class!

I'm traveling incognito!

- Good-bye. - Good-bye. Have a safe trip. - Thanks for everything.

- Is it a free seat, Father? - Yes. - Thanks.

Are we kidding?

He gave us the Empire, he brought back order...

He made Italy a nation respected all over the world!

And these are facts!

- Excuse me. - Go ahead.

”Dear Duce,

I'm 56 years old. In my whole life, I've never looked from a window,

since I live in a cave, worse than the one in the nativity scene,

Now I'm asking you if I can have a home.

Not really for the house, but for the window, I've never had one.

Can you give me one?

Now that my son died in Africa, and left me completely alone?

Dear Duce, now that I'm alone, I just want to have a window,

to look through, and pray for you, since you need it so much.

My name is Gallicchio Lorenzo, of the dead Eucleo Andrea. "

THE END

Original English subs by croix@KG

Revised by edam17@KG February 2013