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1
00:00:34,167 --> 00:00:37,368
Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
2
00:00:39,473 --> 00:00:42,574
Captioning made possible by
The u.S. Department of education
And nickelodeon
3
00:00:42,643 --> 00:00:44,776
Captioned by the national
Captioning institute
--www.Ncicap.Org--
4
00:01:00,162 --> 00:01:01,761
[horse neighs]
5
00:01:01,830 --> 00:01:05,331
I have shown you
The horrors of war!
6
00:01:07,502 --> 00:01:10,503
The devastation
Of famine.
7
00:01:13,141 --> 00:01:14,774
Pictures of my birth.
8
00:01:14,843 --> 00:01:16,776
But I don't think
You comprehend
9
00:01:16,844 --> 00:01:19,278
What awaits you
In adult life.
10
00:01:19,347 --> 00:01:20,946
To better prepare you
11
00:01:21,015 --> 00:01:23,483
For the inevitable
Character-building horrors
12
00:01:23,551 --> 00:01:26,052
We will now play
Bludgeon ball!
13
00:01:26,121 --> 00:01:27,153
It's fun!
14
00:01:35,663 --> 00:01:38,131
So, it's human
Against alien.
15
00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:40,133
Ironic I should
Face my enemy
16
00:01:40,202 --> 00:01:42,168
In this stupid,
Barbaric game.
17
00:01:42,237 --> 00:01:44,937
Let this be
Our battlefield.
18
00:01:45,006 --> 00:01:48,108
It's the size of
A hippo, that head.
19
00:01:48,176 --> 00:01:49,375
[tweet!]
20
00:01:53,248 --> 00:01:54,847
All: whoa!
21
00:01:54,916 --> 00:01:56,415
Hee-hee-hee-hee!
22
00:02:18,406 --> 00:02:20,073
Hmm.
23
00:02:26,347 --> 00:02:28,782
Eee! Ahh! Ooh! Ah!
24
00:02:28,850 --> 00:02:29,882
Ah-ah-ah-ah!
25
00:02:34,523 --> 00:02:37,457
No-o-o-o-o-o-o!
26
00:02:37,525 --> 00:02:40,293
Ooh! Ah! Eee! Ooh!
27
00:02:44,299 --> 00:02:47,266
Whoa! Look at his eyeball!
28
00:02:48,803 --> 00:02:51,070
The eyeball of
An alien invader!
29
00:02:51,139 --> 00:02:52,839
Lies! Lies!
30
00:02:52,907 --> 00:02:55,875
Have you never
Heard of...Pink eye?!
31
00:02:55,943 --> 00:02:57,543
It is a normal
Human illness.
32
00:02:57,612 --> 00:03:00,913
Yeah. Pinky has it
Pretty bad right now.
33
00:03:02,917 --> 00:03:05,117
[groaning]
34
00:03:05,186 --> 00:03:08,587
Yeah. Zim's just
Sick and ugly.
35
00:03:11,493 --> 00:03:14,961
No pink eye. Green skin.
Red things. Oh!
36
00:03:18,933 --> 00:03:21,034
Ow! Ooh! Ah! Eee!
Ow! Ooh! Ah! Eee!
37
00:03:21,102 --> 00:03:23,803
[laughing]
38
00:03:23,872 --> 00:03:26,139
Your screaming was
Amusing for awhile, dib,
39
00:03:26,207 --> 00:03:29,241
But now you're just scary.
40
00:03:29,310 --> 00:03:30,810
Go to the counselor's office.
41
00:03:34,415 --> 00:03:36,849
Yes, I am normal.
42
00:03:36,918 --> 00:03:39,752
So normal and ugly am I!
43
00:03:45,893 --> 00:03:47,893
Hi, I'm mr. Dwicky,
The new counselor.
44
00:03:47,962 --> 00:03:49,429
What happened to
The old counselor?
45
00:03:49,497 --> 00:03:51,631
Something...Horrible.
46
00:03:53,301 --> 00:03:55,701
Help me!
47
00:03:55,770 --> 00:03:58,138
So, you wanna tell
Me what's wrong?
48
00:03:58,206 --> 00:03:59,973
Nothing.
49
00:04:00,041 --> 00:04:02,208
This file suggests
Otherwise.
50
00:04:02,277 --> 00:04:04,443
Doesn't matter.
Nobody believes me.
51
00:04:04,512 --> 00:04:07,180
The earth's been
Invaded by an alien.
He goes to this school.
52
00:04:07,249 --> 00:04:09,516
My own people help him
By being so ignorant.
53
00:04:09,584 --> 00:04:12,051
You can laugh now.
I'm crazy and full of lies.
54
00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:14,053
Actually, I always
Believed in aliens,
55
00:04:14,122 --> 00:04:16,389
But I never found
Any proof, so I did
The next best thing.
56
00:04:16,458 --> 00:04:17,890
I work with public
School children.
57
00:04:17,959 --> 00:04:20,026
And they're scary, too.
58
00:04:20,094 --> 00:04:23,229
I've got proof.
This is an alien
Spaceship I captured.
59
00:04:23,298 --> 00:04:25,798
And here's zim's robot dog
Taking out the garbage.
60
00:04:25,867 --> 00:04:27,934
I try to go through
Zim's trash once a week.
61
00:04:28,003 --> 00:04:30,569
Mostly, I just find burnt
Gerbils and worn down
Rubber piggies, but--
62
00:04:30,638 --> 00:04:32,905
So the dog brings
Out the trash?
63
00:04:32,974 --> 00:04:34,774
How can it even hold things
With those nubby arms?
64
00:04:34,842 --> 00:04:37,443
I know! And no one
Else thinks it's weird.
65
00:04:37,512 --> 00:04:39,445
Or like how zim
Doesn't have ears,
66
00:04:39,513 --> 00:04:41,214
Or how he doesn't
Think ponies know
What we're thinking.
67
00:04:41,283 --> 00:04:43,616
Whoa! Calm down.
I believe you, dib.
68
00:04:43,685 --> 00:04:45,885
Y-y-you believe me?
69
00:04:45,954 --> 00:04:48,054
Wait a minute. You escaped
From some experiment
70
00:04:48,123 --> 00:04:50,656
Where they hit you in the head
With car doors, right?
71
00:04:50,725 --> 00:04:52,892
Ha ha. Almost.
But no.
72
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:54,260
I really do
Believe you.
73
00:04:54,329 --> 00:04:55,929
I even want
To help out.
74
00:04:55,997 --> 00:05:00,432
A team? Really?
Two believers
Against the world?
75
00:05:00,501 --> 00:05:01,901
And zim?
76
00:05:04,940 --> 00:05:06,839
If you're serious,
Meet me after school's out.
77
00:05:06,908 --> 00:05:08,307
You got it, partner!
78
00:05:08,376 --> 00:05:09,775
Partner!
79
00:05:10,912 --> 00:05:14,414
Dwicky! You really
Believe in aliens?
80
00:05:14,483 --> 00:05:17,349
Not anymore. All the
Childlike wonder was
Ripped from my heart
81
00:05:17,418 --> 00:05:19,852
The day my foot got
Stuck in an escalator
82
00:05:19,921 --> 00:05:21,587
And aliens didn't
Come rescue me.
83
00:05:21,656 --> 00:05:25,625
No. I'll just humor dib
Till he tells me what
The real problem is.
84
00:05:25,694 --> 00:05:30,964
Ah! That's psycho-
Technical talk!
85
00:05:31,032 --> 00:05:32,198
It is.
86
00:05:37,738 --> 00:05:39,872
We teamed up just in time
For you to help out with my plan
87
00:05:39,941 --> 00:05:41,874
To get zim to confess his
Alien self to the world.
88
00:05:41,943 --> 00:05:44,143
Hey, that sounds
Fun! What's that?
89
00:05:44,212 --> 00:05:46,579
A schematic for an alien
Identification transmitter.
90
00:05:46,647 --> 00:05:49,315
I yanked it from zim's computer.
You can send messages
91
00:05:49,384 --> 00:05:51,217
With encoded signatures
From alien races.
92
00:05:51,286 --> 00:05:54,320
You know, if it works,
We can pretend we're aliens
93
00:05:54,389 --> 00:05:57,023
And send zim a transmission,
Setting him up for a trap.
94
00:05:57,092 --> 00:06:00,426
Right! We can catch him on
Video without his disguise.
95
00:06:00,495 --> 00:06:02,562
I was going to use it to call
Him names in alien languages,
96
00:06:02,631 --> 00:06:04,063
But your plan's
Cool, too.
97
00:06:19,167 --> 00:06:21,100
Now do you understand
My latest
98
00:06:21,169 --> 00:06:25,305
And most brilliant plan
For earth conquest, gir?
99
00:06:25,373 --> 00:06:27,439
I gonna eat that fish.
100
00:06:27,508 --> 00:06:30,610
No, gir. The fish
Is part of the plan.
101
00:06:30,678 --> 00:06:31,777
[ringing]
102
00:06:31,846 --> 00:06:33,546
Is it you, irken zim?
103
00:06:33,614 --> 00:06:37,016
Yes, I am zim!
Who are you?
104
00:06:37,084 --> 00:06:40,353
We are digzum and commodore
Sloat of the planet plookisia.
105
00:06:40,421 --> 00:06:43,155
We have crash landed on
This horrific planet
106
00:06:43,224 --> 00:06:45,792
And you have some
Materials we could use
For repairs, you know?
107
00:06:45,860 --> 00:06:48,227
Give me one reason
Why I should help you.
108
00:06:48,296 --> 00:06:51,864
A trade. In return for
Your help we will give
You some super weapons.
109
00:06:51,932 --> 00:06:54,166
We would be most
Grateful...You jerk.
110
00:06:54,235 --> 00:06:57,503
Heh, I could always
Use more superweapons.
111
00:06:57,571 --> 00:06:59,238
You might not know this,
But I'm, uh,
112
00:06:59,306 --> 00:07:01,373
Sorta gonna wipe out all
The life of this planet.
113
00:07:01,442 --> 00:07:03,843
Great! We'll meet you
In the woods in one hour.
114
00:07:03,912 --> 00:07:05,177
And don't wear
A disguise.
115
00:07:05,246 --> 00:07:06,979
Just so we know
You're not a human.
116
00:07:07,048 --> 00:07:08,547
The woods, huh?
117
00:07:08,616 --> 00:07:10,082
Vague, but ok.
118
00:07:10,150 --> 00:07:12,451
But those weapons
Better be super.
119
00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:15,388
Oh, they'll be super.
They'll be so super
120
00:07:15,457 --> 00:07:18,023
You'll rue the day
You ever messed
With planet earth.
121
00:07:18,092 --> 00:07:21,393
[maniacal laughter]
122
00:07:26,100 --> 00:07:28,234
He seemed like
A happy guy.
123
00:07:33,408 --> 00:07:35,307
This is gonna be great!
124
00:07:35,376 --> 00:07:39,145
Today we expose zim for
The evil beast that he is!
125
00:07:49,924 --> 00:07:52,725
Ok, I don't think
Zim's showing up, dib.
126
00:07:52,794 --> 00:07:54,793
Maybe it's time you
Two stopped playing
127
00:07:54,862 --> 00:07:56,929
And told me the real
Reason you're
So frustrated.
128
00:07:56,997 --> 00:08:00,432
Playing? This isn't
Playing, this is--
129
00:08:00,501 --> 00:08:02,000
You don't believe me!
130
00:08:02,069 --> 00:08:03,035
You...
131
00:08:03,104 --> 00:08:04,971
I thought you were different!
132
00:08:05,039 --> 00:08:08,507
Look, I know you think
I lied, and I-I did,
133
00:08:08,576 --> 00:08:10,042
But I was only
Trying to help--
134
00:08:10,111 --> 00:08:12,845
Isn't this just great!
While you waste my time,
135
00:08:12,914 --> 00:08:15,213
Earth gets one step
Closer to being taken over!
136
00:08:15,282 --> 00:08:16,749
That's my problem
Right there.
137
00:08:16,818 --> 00:08:20,219
My problem is that
The human race seems
To want to be destroyed--
138
00:08:20,288 --> 00:08:24,424
Say, why don't we talk
About this at school--
139
00:08:38,139 --> 00:08:39,271
He's here!
140
00:08:39,340 --> 00:08:41,807
Who...What....An alien?
141
00:08:41,876 --> 00:08:43,042
A real...
142
00:08:43,111 --> 00:08:44,610
A real alien. Yes.
143
00:08:44,679 --> 00:08:46,745
Glad to see you've
Come around, mr. Dwicky!
144
00:08:46,814 --> 00:08:48,214
Here. Record.
145
00:08:50,385 --> 00:08:53,119
Zim! We meet at last!
146
00:08:53,187 --> 00:08:55,521
I just saw you
Three hours ago...
147
00:08:55,590 --> 00:08:57,423
What are you doing
Here, stink-meat?
148
00:08:57,492 --> 00:08:59,225
You fell for
Our trick, zim.
149
00:08:59,294 --> 00:09:01,728
There are no
Plookisians coming
To give you weapons!
150
00:09:01,796 --> 00:09:03,129
Isn't that right,
Mr. Dwicky?
151
00:09:03,198 --> 00:09:04,530
Dwicky, huh?
152
00:09:04,599 --> 00:09:06,999
Two against the armada.
I'm not worried.
153
00:09:07,067 --> 00:09:08,601
Hi! Looka this!
154
00:09:08,670 --> 00:09:10,136
Doodeedooo!
155
00:09:10,204 --> 00:09:13,038
[squeaking noises]
156
00:09:15,943 --> 00:09:17,844
Gir! Enough!
157
00:09:17,912 --> 00:09:21,180
Two will become
Millions once the world
Sees this tape, zim.
158
00:09:21,249 --> 00:09:22,615
We'll swat--huh?
159
00:09:42,470 --> 00:09:44,369
I don't see any other
Plookisians here.
160
00:09:44,438 --> 00:09:45,871
But I coulda sworn...
161
00:09:50,311 --> 00:09:51,277
[squeaking]
162
00:09:54,348 --> 00:09:55,948
Hey, who are you?
163
00:09:56,017 --> 00:09:57,916
Oh, hey, howsit goin'?
164
00:09:57,985 --> 00:10:00,353
I'm mooshy and
This is spoopty.
165
00:10:00,421 --> 00:10:01,787
We're plookisians.
166
00:10:01,856 --> 00:10:04,457
We heard a plookisian
Signal and we came
Back to check it out,
167
00:10:04,525 --> 00:10:06,325
You know, 'cause
That's what we do.
168
00:10:06,394 --> 00:10:08,694
Yeah, but it musta
Been a mix-up. Sorry
For the interruption.
169
00:10:08,762 --> 00:10:10,395
Wait, I sent the signal!
170
00:10:10,464 --> 00:10:12,932
I was using it
To lure this alien.
171
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,466
Hey, none of our business.
172
00:10:14,535 --> 00:10:17,102
You're really all aliens!?
173
00:10:18,973 --> 00:10:20,239
Huh...Ahhh...
Of course not.
174
00:10:20,308 --> 00:10:21,607
Gimme that camera.
175
00:10:21,675 --> 00:10:24,610
Well, to us
You're the aliens.
176
00:10:26,614 --> 00:10:30,349
[both laughing hysterically]
177
00:10:31,819 --> 00:10:34,520
That is never not funny!
178
00:10:34,589 --> 00:10:35,922
I know! I know!
179
00:10:35,990 --> 00:10:37,990
Spoopty, you crazeh!
180
00:10:38,059 --> 00:10:40,092
Enough! Where
Are my weapons?!
181
00:10:40,161 --> 00:10:41,393
What weapons?
182
00:10:41,462 --> 00:10:43,629
The super weapons
You promised me!
183
00:10:43,698 --> 00:10:45,431
Geez, zim,
Don't you get it?
184
00:10:45,500 --> 00:10:47,699
They never
Talked to you. It
Was all a trick.
185
00:10:47,768 --> 00:10:48,767
Where are they?
186
00:10:48,836 --> 00:10:50,770
I dunno what
You're talkin' about,
187
00:10:50,838 --> 00:10:52,438
But if it'll make you happy,
188
00:10:52,507 --> 00:10:54,607
We have some super weapons
Lying around if you want 'em.
189
00:10:54,676 --> 00:10:56,709
Spoopty, get the guy
The super weapons.
190
00:10:56,777 --> 00:10:58,611
You sure are nice, boss.
191
00:10:58,680 --> 00:11:00,580
Well, I do what I can.
192
00:11:02,950 --> 00:11:05,852
A real space ship!
193
00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,186
Spaceship!
194
00:11:07,255 --> 00:11:10,856
And you fly through
The stars seeing all
The universe?
195
00:11:10,925 --> 00:11:12,858
Yeah, well flying
Through the stars
196
00:11:12,927 --> 00:11:15,761
Would be pretty stupid, man.
197
00:11:15,830 --> 00:11:17,663
But, yeah, we fly around.
198
00:11:17,731 --> 00:11:19,131
You wanna come along?
199
00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:20,900
Wow, do I?
200
00:11:20,969 --> 00:11:24,670
Yah!
201
00:11:27,608 --> 00:11:30,175
Hey, thank you!
202
00:11:30,244 --> 00:11:31,343
Dwicky!
203
00:11:31,412 --> 00:11:33,011
What about our team?
204
00:11:34,148 --> 00:11:35,281
Ooh.
205
00:11:43,691 --> 00:11:45,024
Sad, little dib.
206
00:11:45,093 --> 00:11:47,559
No more ally and
No more proof!
207
00:11:47,628 --> 00:11:48,960
How did you know
To come here anyway?
208
00:11:49,029 --> 00:11:51,096
Zim, you moron!
209
00:11:51,165 --> 00:11:53,632
I told you I arranged
This meeting!
210
00:11:53,701 --> 00:11:57,336
Uh-huh. Well, see you.
211
00:11:57,405 --> 00:11:58,937
Come on, gir!
212
00:12:07,681 --> 00:12:09,648
[groaning]
15977
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