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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:10,060
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
2
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(horn honks)
3
00:00:15,637 --> 00:00:17,539
JENNA: Hey.
Hey!
4
00:00:17,606 --> 00:00:19,405
Hey!
(both laughing)
5
00:00:22,378 --> 00:00:23,512
What's up now, water?
6
00:00:23,581 --> 00:00:25,716
Get some, bitch!
7
00:00:27,719 --> 00:00:28,652
Wilfred...
8
00:00:28,719 --> 00:00:31,087
Hey, Ryyy-Seroni...
9
00:00:31,155 --> 00:00:33,957
The-San-Francisco-Treat-
Now-In-The-New...
10
00:00:34,025 --> 00:00:38,431
Chicken... (laughs)
What's up, neighbor?
11
00:00:38,551 --> 00:00:39,967
JENNA: Is Wilfred
bothering you?
12
00:00:40,035 --> 00:00:42,636
Drew was away for his
bachelor party this weekend,
13
00:00:42,704 --> 00:00:44,804
so Wilfy has all this
pent-up energy.
14
00:00:44,934 --> 00:00:47,235
Oh. Right.
The hunting trip.
15
00:00:47,303 --> 00:00:49,104
Yeah.
Sorry I couldn't make it,
16
00:00:49,171 --> 00:00:50,905
but I had to baby-sit
my new nephew.
17
00:00:50,973 --> 00:00:52,674
Bullshit!
You spent the last 48 hours
18
00:00:52,741 --> 00:00:54,709
on the couch, in your undies,
playing with your doodle.
19
00:00:54,776 --> 00:00:55,710
Aah!
20
00:00:55,778 --> 00:00:57,646
(laughing)
21
00:00:57,713 --> 00:01:00,048
Wilfred loves the hose.
Oh, that reminds me--
22
00:01:00,116 --> 00:01:01,850
we haven't gotten your
RSVP yet, for the wedding.
23
00:01:01,918 --> 00:01:03,218
That's strange.
24
00:01:03,286 --> 00:01:04,253
I mailed that weeks ago.
25
00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:05,754
Uh, no, you didn't.
26
00:01:05,822 --> 00:01:07,923
You remember-- you used it
to squash that spider.
27
00:01:07,991 --> 00:01:09,591
You know, that
little baby-- agh!
28
00:01:09,659 --> 00:01:10,493
(laughing)
29
00:01:13,030 --> 00:01:14,497
No worries.
30
00:01:14,565 --> 00:01:16,032
I assumed you were coming.
31
00:01:16,100 --> 00:01:17,634
The Bay Club needs a head count,
32
00:01:17,702 --> 00:01:20,037
so I just needed to
know if you'd be alone.
33
00:01:20,105 --> 00:01:21,672
I mean... if you
were bringing someone.
34
00:01:21,740 --> 00:01:24,609
I mean... if... I knew
you and Amanda had brok--
35
00:01:24,677 --> 00:01:27,478
You know what? I'm just gonna
put you down as a "plus-one."
36
00:01:27,546 --> 00:01:28,980
You are coming, right?
37
00:01:29,048 --> 00:01:30,916
Oh, I wouldn't miss it for the world.
38
00:01:30,984 --> 00:01:32,652
Yay!
39
00:01:32,719 --> 00:01:34,120
Oh, and guess who's gonna
be our ring bearer?
40
00:01:34,188 --> 00:01:36,222
Wilfred?
Yeah!
41
00:01:36,290 --> 00:01:38,091
I wouldn't be wedding
without our little sweetheart.
42
00:01:44,665 --> 00:01:45,531
Or this one?
43
00:01:52,006 --> 00:01:53,140
The second one, right?
44
00:01:53,208 --> 00:01:54,775
I don't really care.
45
00:01:54,843 --> 00:01:57,377
Ryan, I've been on a
lot of walks in my life,
46
00:01:57,445 --> 00:01:59,880
but this is the most
important, and the shortest.
47
00:01:59,948 --> 00:02:01,181
What's your problem?
48
00:02:01,249 --> 00:02:02,783
Have you seen the
way they are together?
49
00:02:02,851 --> 00:02:04,585
So happy and perfect?
50
00:02:04,653 --> 00:02:05,586
It's ridiculous.
51
00:02:05,653 --> 00:02:06,753
You're jealous.
52
00:02:06,821 --> 00:02:08,255
I'm not.
You are.
53
00:02:08,323 --> 00:02:10,024
You want Jenna to be
your sweet, sweet baby,
54
00:02:10,092 --> 00:02:11,592
but she loves Drew.
55
00:02:11,660 --> 00:02:12,693
I'm not jealous, I'm just...
56
00:02:12,761 --> 00:02:15,630
Sweet, sweet baby?
Really?
57
00:02:15,697 --> 00:02:17,198
I like it.
58
00:02:17,266 --> 00:02:19,734
Every time I see them smiling
59
00:02:19,802 --> 00:02:22,137
and talking about their
stupid fairy-tale wedding
60
00:02:22,204 --> 00:02:23,505
at the Bay Club...
61
00:02:23,572 --> 00:02:25,573
it just reminds me
of everything I lost.
62
00:02:25,641 --> 00:02:27,076
Amanda again?
63
00:02:27,143 --> 00:02:27,977
I though we were over her.
64
00:02:28,044 --> 00:02:28,978
Well, I'm not.
65
00:02:29,046 --> 00:02:30,513
She's not dead.
66
00:02:30,580 --> 00:02:31,848
Pick up the phone and call her.
67
00:02:31,915 --> 00:02:33,282
I can't.
68
00:02:33,350 --> 00:02:35,385
I'm... well,
you know what I am.
69
00:02:35,453 --> 00:02:37,621
I-I can't bring her
into... this.
70
00:02:37,688 --> 00:02:39,756
Well, then just admit
you're too much of a pussy
71
00:02:39,824 --> 00:02:41,458
to let Amanda see the real you
72
00:02:41,526 --> 00:02:43,494
and stop blaming Drew and
Jenna for your unhappiness.
73
00:02:43,562 --> 00:02:46,898
Being happy is just like
being gay-- it's a choice.
74
00:02:46,965 --> 00:02:49,667
That's why they mean the same thing.
75
00:02:49,735 --> 00:02:50,668
(loud barking)
76
00:02:50,736 --> 00:02:51,669
Jesus!
77
00:02:51,737 --> 00:02:52,837
Look at this piece of shit.
78
00:02:52,905 --> 00:02:54,773
So full of anger and resentment
79
00:02:54,841 --> 00:02:58,010
just because I'm exceptionally
handsome and living free.
80
00:02:58,077 --> 00:02:59,711
His heart is so full of bitterness
81
00:02:59,779 --> 00:03:01,213
that there's no room
for anything else.
82
00:03:01,280 --> 00:03:02,848
You don't want to be like him, Ryan.
83
00:03:02,915 --> 00:03:05,217
He's a bad, bad dog.
84
00:03:05,284 --> 00:03:06,752
Yeah, I'm talking about you.
85
00:03:06,819 --> 00:03:08,020
What's the matter, dude?
You've never seen
86
00:03:08,087 --> 00:03:09,821
lipstick this big?
You keep yapping
87
00:03:09,889 --> 00:03:11,991
and I'll smear it all over
your lips-- whoo-hoo!
88
00:03:13,627 --> 00:03:15,762
Uh, yeah...
we-we should probably go.
89
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,601
Hey, Tucker.
Hey, Loki.
90
00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:23,470
Hey, Charlie.
Hey, George.
91
00:03:23,538 --> 00:03:25,005
(clears throat)
Jellybeans.
92
00:03:25,072 --> 00:03:26,506
RYAN:
Come on, Wilfred.
93
00:03:26,574 --> 00:03:28,842
Hey, you guys heard the big news?
94
00:03:28,910 --> 00:03:31,111
I'm gonna be ring bearer
at Jenna's wedding.
95
00:03:31,178 --> 00:03:33,012
I know!
It's gonna be awesome.
96
00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:34,814
I mean, her fianc?'s kind of a jerk,
97
00:03:34,882 --> 00:03:37,050
but at least he lets me
watch him lay the pipe.
98
00:03:37,118 --> 00:03:38,351
Hey, Ryan!
99
00:03:39,653 --> 00:03:40,686
Who just shat?
100
00:03:40,754 --> 00:03:42,421
Charlie...
101
00:03:42,489 --> 00:03:43,622
(laughs)
102
00:03:43,690 --> 00:03:45,191
So, what else has been happening?
103
00:03:45,259 --> 00:03:46,826
Something wrong?
104
00:03:46,894 --> 00:03:48,861
Jenna wants us to write
our own wedding vows,
105
00:03:48,929 --> 00:03:51,530
and I'm having trouble
getting started.
106
00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:53,866
I'll let you get to it.
Actually...
107
00:03:53,934 --> 00:03:56,836
I was kind of hoping
you could help me out.
108
00:03:56,904 --> 00:03:59,372
I'm-I'm not much of a writer.
Hey...
109
00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,608
I don't need help
with the writing, just...
110
00:04:01,676 --> 00:04:04,944
the inspiration, you know?
111
00:04:05,012 --> 00:04:07,480
You got any "doobage," bro?
112
00:04:21,327 --> 00:04:23,528
Oh, man...
113
00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:26,097
I can't even remember
the last time I got high.
114
00:04:26,165 --> 00:04:28,600
Yeah, we'd all love to smoke out,
115
00:04:28,668 --> 00:04:30,436
we really do have work to do, so...
116
00:04:30,504 --> 00:04:33,405
The least we can do is to
make sure his moronic vows
117
00:04:33,473 --> 00:04:34,807
don't ruin her wedding.
118
00:04:34,875 --> 00:04:36,575
Okay, here's what I'm thinking:
119
00:04:36,643 --> 00:04:38,277
Drew comes out, right?
120
00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:41,514
Before he even says a word,
he vanishes.
121
00:04:41,581 --> 00:04:43,649
Then everyone's, like,
"Aw, shit!"
122
00:04:43,717 --> 00:04:45,986
That was just a hologram of Drew.
123
00:04:46,053 --> 00:04:48,522
Then Drew rides in on a panda
124
00:04:48,589 --> 00:04:50,557
and Eddie Van Halen, he's just
like-- (imitates guitar)
125
00:04:50,625 --> 00:04:53,160
Actually, wait, what is
the budget for these vows?
126
00:04:53,228 --> 00:04:54,161
Did you ever wonder
what it would be like
127
00:04:54,228 --> 00:04:56,096
if Wilfred could talk?
128
00:04:57,532 --> 00:05:00,501
I mean, look at him...
129
00:05:00,568 --> 00:05:02,470
it's like he's trying to
tell us something right now.
130
00:05:02,537 --> 00:05:04,405
(sighing)
131
00:05:04,473 --> 00:05:06,241
Hey, what are you trying to say, boy?
132
00:05:06,308 --> 00:05:08,710
Okay, what I'm saying is
we need to start work
133
00:05:08,777 --> 00:05:10,044
on these vows.
134
00:05:11,613 --> 00:05:13,147
Okay, uh, thank you.
135
00:05:13,215 --> 00:05:15,149
That was tasty.
136
00:05:15,217 --> 00:05:16,050
But about these vows, we--
137
00:05:17,786 --> 00:05:18,753
Look, we really need to focus,
138
00:05:18,821 --> 00:05:19,654
if we're gonna--
139
00:05:21,290 --> 00:05:22,990
Okay, you know what?
140
00:05:23,058 --> 00:05:24,692
If you need me, I'm going
to be in the other room.
141
00:05:24,760 --> 00:05:27,095
Working.
142
00:05:29,030 --> 00:05:30,030
DREW:
Oh, hey, don't tell Jenna
143
00:05:30,098 --> 00:05:32,299
that I gave Wilfred junk food.
144
00:05:32,367 --> 00:05:33,500
She'd kill me.
145
00:05:33,568 --> 00:05:35,169
I doubt that.
146
00:05:35,237 --> 00:05:37,171
You two seem to have a
pretty happy relationship.
147
00:05:37,238 --> 00:05:39,106
We do.
148
00:05:39,174 --> 00:05:41,776
Not that we haven't had our problems.
149
00:05:41,843 --> 00:05:44,479
What do you mean?
150
00:05:44,547 --> 00:05:46,681
I don't really like to talk about it.
151
00:05:46,749 --> 00:05:48,583
Ah, that's cool.
152
00:05:48,651 --> 00:05:50,652
I understand.
153
00:05:53,522 --> 00:05:55,490
What were we talking about?
154
00:05:55,558 --> 00:05:59,261
Uh, something about how
you and Jenna had a falling out,
155
00:05:59,329 --> 00:06:01,096
or something...
156
00:06:01,164 --> 00:06:02,164
Listen, you're a good friend.
157
00:06:02,231 --> 00:06:03,765
I can trust you.
158
00:06:03,833 --> 00:06:04,933
(coughs)
159
00:06:06,803 --> 00:06:10,005
The thing is...
(sighs)
160
00:06:10,072 --> 00:06:11,907
Jenna cheated on me.
161
00:06:11,974 --> 00:06:13,274
What?!
162
00:06:13,342 --> 00:06:16,077
Yeah... yeah...
we had a big fight and...
163
00:06:16,145 --> 00:06:19,180
we didn't talk for, like, a week,
164
00:06:19,248 --> 00:06:21,215
and it just happened.
165
00:06:21,283 --> 00:06:23,017
Jesus!
166
00:06:23,085 --> 00:06:25,185
No wonder you're having
trouble writing the vows.
167
00:06:25,253 --> 00:06:27,788
Yeah... no!
168
00:06:27,855 --> 00:06:29,857
That was a long time ago, and I...
169
00:06:29,924 --> 00:06:33,193
completely forgave her.
170
00:06:33,261 --> 00:06:36,430
The reason that I'm having trouble
171
00:06:36,498 --> 00:06:40,934
is because she's so amazing...
172
00:06:41,002 --> 00:06:44,605
that I can't find
the words to describe
173
00:06:44,673 --> 00:06:47,241
how much I love her...
174
00:06:47,309 --> 00:06:50,311
for loving me...
175
00:06:50,379 --> 00:06:52,580
despite my faults.
176
00:06:52,648 --> 00:06:54,782
That's great.
177
00:06:54,850 --> 00:06:59,220
I mean, dude...
it took me a month
178
00:06:59,287 --> 00:07:02,222
to come up with
the inscription on the ring.
179
00:07:02,290 --> 00:07:04,591
It's only three words.
180
00:07:06,828 --> 00:07:07,795
(wry laugh)
181
00:07:07,862 --> 00:07:09,896
That's... really beautiful.
182
00:07:09,964 --> 00:07:13,300
Oh, I just had a great idea.
183
00:07:13,368 --> 00:07:15,469
You should walk
Wilfred down the aisle.
184
00:07:15,536 --> 00:07:18,171
Oh... I...
185
00:07:21,709 --> 00:07:22,742
Sure.
186
00:07:22,810 --> 00:07:26,079
Nice. Nice.
187
00:07:26,146 --> 00:07:29,415
Jenna's gonna be stoked.
188
00:07:29,483 --> 00:07:31,184
No, no, you hold onto it.
189
00:07:31,252 --> 00:07:34,187
You're a ring bearer now, bro.
190
00:07:37,425 --> 00:07:38,892
This is bullshit!
191
00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:40,293
I don't even want to go
to this wedding.
192
00:07:40,361 --> 00:07:42,028
Now I'm the co-ring bearer?
193
00:07:42,096 --> 00:07:44,664
Yeah... we need
to talk about your title.
194
00:07:44,732 --> 00:07:47,033
Co-Ring Bearer makes it
sound like we're equals.
195
00:07:47,101 --> 00:07:48,902
"Above all, love."
196
00:07:48,969 --> 00:07:50,303
(scoffs)
That's what it says.
197
00:07:50,371 --> 00:07:51,871
Screw them.
198
00:07:51,939 --> 00:07:53,172
I mean, basically, all you have to do
199
00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:55,041
is follow me down
the aisle and make sure
200
00:07:55,108 --> 00:07:56,275
my tail doesn't touch the ground.
201
00:07:56,343 --> 00:07:57,944
I could live with Tail Holder,
202
00:07:58,012 --> 00:08:02,415
and maybe Associate
Ring Bearer, but--
203
00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:03,983
The hell with that.
I'm not going.
204
00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:07,854
Fine! You can be
Co-Ring Bearer, you big baby!
205
00:08:07,921 --> 00:08:09,389
This isn't fair, Wilfred.
206
00:08:09,456 --> 00:08:11,558
They have cheating, anger issues,
207
00:08:11,625 --> 00:08:13,393
but they're still madly
in love with each other.
208
00:08:13,460 --> 00:08:15,295
Meanwhile, I can't even
have a relationship?
209
00:08:15,362 --> 00:08:17,297
Wait a minute...
210
00:08:17,365 --> 00:08:19,999
Drew cheated on Jenna?
211
00:08:20,067 --> 00:08:21,301
She cheated on Drew.
212
00:08:21,369 --> 00:08:23,169
(yells)
213
00:08:23,237 --> 00:08:25,305
You shut your lying face vagina.
214
00:08:25,372 --> 00:08:26,939
Jenna wouldn't cheat on anyone.
215
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:28,674
Whatever.
I'm still not going.
216
00:08:28,742 --> 00:08:29,842
Well, you have to go.
217
00:08:29,910 --> 00:08:31,844
You have the ring.
218
00:08:31,912 --> 00:08:32,730
Good point.
219
00:08:32,850 --> 00:08:34,913
You're the ring bearer, you take it.
220
00:08:45,317 --> 00:08:46,150
No...
221
00:08:48,720 --> 00:08:49,620
No...
222
00:08:51,323 --> 00:08:52,290
Yeah.
223
00:08:54,126 --> 00:08:56,360
No.
Will you hurry up?
224
00:08:56,428 --> 00:08:58,029
Well, I can't do it
when you're watching.
225
00:08:58,096 --> 00:08:59,797
It's just so typical.
226
00:08:59,865 --> 00:09:01,098
You knew I'd need that ring
to back out of the wedding,
227
00:09:01,166 --> 00:09:02,566
so you swallowed it.
228
00:09:02,634 --> 00:09:04,435
How's this my fault?
You threw it.
229
00:09:04,503 --> 00:09:06,103
I threw it for you to catch.
230
00:09:06,171 --> 00:09:07,405
And catch it, I did.
231
00:09:07,472 --> 00:09:08,439
And quite skillfully, I might add.
232
00:09:08,507 --> 00:09:09,907
You throw like a girl.
233
00:09:15,413 --> 00:09:17,614
If you ask me, I think
you wanted this to happen.
234
00:09:17,682 --> 00:09:19,549
You won't be satisfied until
you've ruined Jenna's wedding.
235
00:09:19,617 --> 00:09:20,850
I don't want to ruin it.
236
00:09:20,918 --> 00:09:22,285
I just don't want to be there.
237
00:09:22,353 --> 00:09:23,887
Well, if that's true,
238
00:09:23,954 --> 00:09:24,821
why are you trying to
turn me against Jenna
239
00:09:24,889 --> 00:09:26,456
by calling her a cheater?
240
00:09:26,524 --> 00:09:28,424
Because, according to Drew,
she is a cheater.
241
00:09:28,492 --> 00:09:29,959
Oh, come on, Ryan.
242
00:09:30,026 --> 00:09:31,427
If Jenna's capable
of cheating on Drew,
243
00:09:31,495 --> 00:09:33,062
then she's capable of cheating on me,
244
00:09:33,130 --> 00:09:34,697
and we both know Jenna would
never pet another dog.
245
00:09:34,765 --> 00:09:35,798
Are you telling me
you've never smelled
246
00:09:35,866 --> 00:09:37,533
another dog on Jenna's hands?
247
00:09:37,601 --> 00:09:39,602
Yeah, that... but
that's just from her
248
00:09:39,670 --> 00:09:41,871
pushing other dogs away.
249
00:09:41,938 --> 00:09:43,606
JENNA:
Hey, guys!
250
00:09:43,673 --> 00:09:45,007
Hey, Wilfred!
251
00:09:45,075 --> 00:09:46,809
Hey, babe.
252
00:09:46,877 --> 00:09:48,744
What, have you been at
the grocery store all this time?
253
00:09:48,812 --> 00:09:50,545
Hey, you... (laughing)
254
00:09:50,613 --> 00:09:51,981
Aw...
255
00:09:52,048 --> 00:09:53,282
Looks like someone missed you.
256
00:09:53,350 --> 00:09:54,183
Either that, or he smells Rocky
257
00:09:54,251 --> 00:09:55,284
from the pet store.
258
00:09:55,352 --> 00:09:57,220
(inhaling)
The pet store?!
259
00:09:57,287 --> 00:09:59,055
You didn't mention anything
about going to the pet store.
260
00:09:59,123 --> 00:10:01,457
Who the hell's Rocky?
261
00:10:01,525 --> 00:10:04,060
Hey, you got that ring somewhere safe?
262
00:10:04,128 --> 00:10:05,462
Oh, yeah... yeah...
263
00:10:09,333 --> 00:10:11,935
As soon as they're gone,
you need to shit.
264
00:10:12,003 --> 00:10:13,938
How can I even think
about shitting right now?
265
00:10:14,005 --> 00:10:15,806
I just found out Jenna's
been down at the pet store,
266
00:10:15,874 --> 00:10:17,341
sucking another dog's dick.
267
00:10:17,409 --> 00:10:19,344
No, she didn't.
She just petted him.
268
00:10:19,411 --> 00:10:21,112
It's the same thing, Ryan.
269
00:10:21,180 --> 00:10:23,982
I mean, what's this
Rocky got that I haven't?
270
00:10:24,050 --> 00:10:25,817
(anxious gasping)
271
00:10:25,885 --> 00:10:26,985
Papers...
272
00:10:27,053 --> 00:10:28,487
Oh, God!
273
00:10:28,555 --> 00:10:29,822
(anxious gasping)
274
00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:31,657
How can I compete with a purebred?
275
00:10:31,725 --> 00:10:32,925
Wilfred, relax.
276
00:10:32,993 --> 00:10:34,527
How do you even know Rocky's a dog?
277
00:10:34,595 --> 00:10:38,464
Maybe he's just a guy
working at the pet store.
278
00:10:38,532 --> 00:10:40,032
(relieved laughter)
279
00:10:40,100 --> 00:10:41,667
Of course.
That makes perfect sense.
280
00:10:41,735 --> 00:10:43,903
He probably just gave her
a friendly hug
281
00:10:43,970 --> 00:10:45,638
to thank her for making a purchase.
282
00:10:45,706 --> 00:10:47,506
I know Jenna would never cheat on me.
283
00:10:47,574 --> 00:10:48,975
(Jenna laughing)
284
00:10:49,042 --> 00:10:51,343
Oh, yeah, you like
that, don't you? Oh!
285
00:10:51,411 --> 00:10:52,678
(Jenna's laughter echoing)
286
00:10:52,746 --> 00:10:54,746
(passionate moaning)
287
00:10:56,582 --> 00:10:58,350
(moaning louder, more passionately)
288
00:11:01,888 --> 00:11:03,354
Hey, buddy.
289
00:11:03,422 --> 00:11:04,856
You want to go outside to play?
290
00:11:04,923 --> 00:11:06,124
Maybe take that shit?
291
00:11:08,794 --> 00:11:12,463
Ryan, I just watched Jenna
take it in the hands
292
00:11:12,531 --> 00:11:13,998
from every guy in the neighborhood.
293
00:11:14,066 --> 00:11:16,334
I ain't going anywhere.
294
00:11:16,402 --> 00:11:17,669
She pet a few dogs.
295
00:11:17,736 --> 00:11:19,170
So what?
296
00:11:19,238 --> 00:11:20,872
I've seen you get petted
by hundreds of people.
297
00:11:20,940 --> 00:11:22,874
It's different, I'm a dude!
298
00:11:22,942 --> 00:11:24,742
Plus, did you see those guys?
299
00:11:24,810 --> 00:11:26,711
I mean, Tucker
I can kind of understand.
300
00:11:26,779 --> 00:11:28,180
He featured on a clever greeting card.
301
00:11:28,247 --> 00:11:29,448
But Jellybeans?
302
00:11:29,515 --> 00:11:32,984
His mother is his sister.
303
00:11:34,119 --> 00:11:35,353
I'm gonna be sick.
304
00:11:36,655 --> 00:11:38,956
Ryan...
305
00:11:40,659 --> 00:11:42,893
Ears, Ryan, ears!
306
00:11:44,562 --> 00:11:45,562
God.
307
00:11:55,273 --> 00:11:56,773
Right. No ring.
308
00:11:56,841 --> 00:11:59,209
That would be too easy.
309
00:12:01,780 --> 00:12:03,380
I'm done messing around, Wilfred.
310
00:12:03,448 --> 00:12:04,882
Put that down and let's go outside.
311
00:12:06,318 --> 00:12:08,819
I don't feel like going out.
312
00:12:08,887 --> 00:12:10,621
God damn it!
Why won't you just shit for me?
313
00:12:10,689 --> 00:12:12,991
Because I can't! Ow...
314
00:12:13,058 --> 00:12:14,959
Why? Do you have
a bowel obstruction?
315
00:12:15,027 --> 00:12:16,294
No.
316
00:12:16,362 --> 00:12:17,695
I have my pride.
317
00:12:17,763 --> 00:12:18,963
(farting with each step)
318
00:12:19,031 --> 00:12:20,331
Screw it.
319
00:12:20,399 --> 00:12:22,100
Where are you going?
320
00:12:22,168 --> 00:12:23,668
I'm done playing your games.
321
00:12:23,736 --> 00:12:25,270
If the only way
I'm gonna skip that wedding
322
00:12:25,337 --> 00:12:27,605
is to buy Drew a new ring,
then so be it.
323
00:12:27,673 --> 00:12:30,142
Tell him I'm not going either.
324
00:12:30,210 --> 00:12:31,810
To the wedding or the bathroom.
325
00:12:31,878 --> 00:12:33,512
Ever!
326
00:12:34,847 --> 00:12:37,115
This cannot be good for me.
327
00:12:42,856 --> 00:12:44,523
Hello? Drew?
328
00:12:44,591 --> 00:12:46,559
Oh, hey.
329
00:12:46,626 --> 00:12:48,094
Sorry, I'll-I'll just
come back later.
330
00:12:48,161 --> 00:12:50,362
No, that's okay.
Uh, we were just...
331
00:12:50,430 --> 00:12:52,265
Putting away my camping stuff.
332
00:12:52,332 --> 00:12:54,601
Let me just... um...
333
00:12:54,669 --> 00:12:57,103
get this sleeping bag.
334
00:12:57,171 --> 00:12:58,504
I'll get the rest later.
335
00:12:58,572 --> 00:13:00,473
What's up, bro?
336
00:13:00,541 --> 00:13:03,076
Actually, uh, I-I'm glad
you're both here.
337
00:13:03,144 --> 00:13:04,911
Just wanted to talk
to you about your wedding.
338
00:13:04,979 --> 00:13:06,546
Oh, good.
339
00:13:06,614 --> 00:13:07,914
Um, now that you're
in the wedding party--
340
00:13:07,982 --> 00:13:09,449
which is so amazing,
by the way--
341
00:13:09,517 --> 00:13:11,085
we need to go
over what you'll be wearing.
342
00:13:11,152 --> 00:13:13,287
Wait here, I-I want to
show you something.
343
00:13:16,825 --> 00:13:19,527
Everything okay, buddy?
Yeah.
344
00:13:19,595 --> 00:13:23,198
Hey, while I've got you alone,
345
00:13:23,266 --> 00:13:25,133
I was looking at that ring.
346
00:13:25,201 --> 00:13:26,568
It's really beautiful.
347
00:13:26,636 --> 00:13:28,871
If you don't mind my asking,
348
00:13:28,939 --> 00:13:31,073
how much does something
like that cost?
349
00:13:31,140 --> 00:13:33,475
I don't know.
350
00:13:33,543 --> 00:13:35,277
About $50?
351
00:13:35,344 --> 00:13:37,112
That's it?
352
00:13:37,180 --> 00:13:40,281
Yeah, when my grandfather
bought it back in 1950.
353
00:13:40,349 --> 00:13:44,051
My Nana gave it to me when
she heard I was engaged.
354
00:13:44,119 --> 00:13:45,820
She was hoping to be here in person
355
00:13:45,888 --> 00:13:48,756
to see it on Jenna's finger, but...
356
00:13:48,823 --> 00:13:50,657
I guess God had other plans.
357
00:13:50,725 --> 00:13:52,693
WILFRED:
Jenna!
358
00:13:52,761 --> 00:13:54,361
Jenna!
359
00:13:54,429 --> 00:13:56,096
Where is she?
360
00:13:56,164 --> 00:13:58,232
Where's that cheating whore?
361
00:13:58,300 --> 00:13:59,633
Wilfred, calm down!
362
00:13:59,701 --> 00:14:01,702
I should calm down?
You should calm up!
363
00:14:01,770 --> 00:14:03,070
You're about to marry
364
00:14:03,138 --> 00:14:04,304
the neighborhood slut
365
00:14:04,372 --> 00:14:05,773
and you don't even care!
366
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:07,775
Here comes the bride...
367
00:14:09,511 --> 00:14:11,645
So... what do you think?
368
00:14:11,713 --> 00:14:13,980
I think you've got some balls
wearing white!
369
00:14:14,048 --> 00:14:16,516
I will have my honor!
370
00:14:16,584 --> 00:14:18,117
Wilfred, no!
(screams)
371
00:14:18,986 --> 00:14:20,620
Oh, my God!
372
00:14:20,687 --> 00:14:22,255
Call 911!
373
00:14:22,322 --> 00:14:23,523
Just don't move...
DREW: Ow!
374
00:14:23,590 --> 00:14:25,591
Wilfred, you bad dog!
Bad dog!
375
00:14:25,659 --> 00:14:27,510
Bad girl!
376
00:14:27,630 --> 00:14:29,831
DREW: Ow...
Just stay calm, just stay calm.
377
00:14:43,575 --> 00:14:46,644
I hate you, happy kids!
378
00:14:46,711 --> 00:14:48,179
Yeah, keep moving, you little...
379
00:14:48,246 --> 00:14:48,951
(farts)
380
00:14:49,071 --> 00:14:50,915
...tiny-balled bastards.
381
00:14:50,983 --> 00:14:53,251
Wilfred.
382
00:14:53,319 --> 00:14:55,453
What are you doing here?
383
00:14:55,521 --> 00:14:57,989
This is my home now.
384
00:14:58,057 --> 00:15:00,325
You heard Jenna.
385
00:15:00,392 --> 00:15:01,626
I'm a bad dog.
386
00:15:01,694 --> 00:15:03,261
Jenna was upset.
387
00:15:03,329 --> 00:15:04,670
Drew was shot in the leg.
388
00:15:04,790 --> 00:15:06,598
Look, if you're missing when she
gets back from the hospital,
389
00:15:06,666 --> 00:15:08,566
she's gonna be worried sick.
390
00:15:08,634 --> 00:15:11,936
It's nothing that a handful
of Jellybeans won't cure.
391
00:15:12,004 --> 00:15:13,672
This is insane.
392
00:15:13,739 --> 00:15:15,707
When did ensuring Jenna
and Drew's happiness
393
00:15:15,774 --> 00:15:17,142
become my full-time job?
394
00:15:17,209 --> 00:15:19,811
I just want to return that ring
395
00:15:19,879 --> 00:15:21,913
and forget about this whole wedding!
396
00:15:21,981 --> 00:15:23,381
She doesn't even deserve
a wedding ring.
397
00:15:23,449 --> 00:15:24,950
Not after how she betrayed me.
398
00:15:25,017 --> 00:15:27,219
So, what, you're just
never gonna shit again?
399
00:15:27,286 --> 00:15:29,020
I've done a lot of good shits
in my life, Ryan.
400
00:15:29,088 --> 00:15:30,989
I'll have my memories.
401
00:15:31,057 --> 00:15:32,424
Holding all that stuff inside
isn't hurting Jenna,
402
00:15:32,492 --> 00:15:33,725
it's hurting you.
403
00:15:33,793 --> 00:15:35,427
You gonna carry around
that pain forever?
404
00:15:35,495 --> 00:15:38,030
What about all the shit
you're holding inside?
405
00:15:38,098 --> 00:15:40,333
You can't hate Drew and Jenna
because they're happy!
406
00:15:40,401 --> 00:15:41,901
This isn't about me, it's about you!
407
00:15:41,969 --> 00:15:43,502
Just let it go...
Just let it go...
408
00:15:43,570 --> 00:15:46,472
and get on with your life!
and get on with your life!
409
00:15:46,540 --> 00:15:49,175
(barking)
410
00:15:49,243 --> 00:15:50,443
Wilfred, you need to get out of there.
411
00:15:50,510 --> 00:15:53,078
Ryan!
Open the gate for me!!
412
00:15:53,146 --> 00:15:55,047
I'm trying!
413
00:15:55,115 --> 00:15:57,383
I want my mommy!
414
00:15:58,985 --> 00:16:01,120
Oh.
(squirting noise)
415
00:16:01,188 --> 00:16:03,823
Are you all right?
416
00:16:03,890 --> 00:16:05,224
Yeah...
417
00:16:05,292 --> 00:16:06,859
Wilfred, look!
The ring!
418
00:16:06,927 --> 00:16:09,128
Oh. Huh?
Here.
419
00:16:09,196 --> 00:16:10,462
Here, get out through here.
420
00:16:10,530 --> 00:16:12,264
Come on.
421
00:16:15,869 --> 00:16:17,035
Where is it?
422
00:16:18,204 --> 00:16:20,239
No!
423
00:16:20,306 --> 00:16:21,673
Calm down, I'm just cleaning it.
424
00:16:21,741 --> 00:16:23,976
Ugh.
425
00:16:26,746 --> 00:16:27,913
Wilfred!
426
00:16:27,981 --> 00:16:29,314
Wilfy!
427
00:16:29,382 --> 00:16:31,717
Oh...
428
00:16:31,785 --> 00:16:33,318
Oh, Wilfy, oh...
429
00:16:33,386 --> 00:16:35,253
You must have been so scared!
430
00:16:35,321 --> 00:16:38,857
I am so, so sorry I yelled at
you, my sweet, sweet baby.
431
00:16:38,925 --> 00:16:41,126
Get a good look, boys!
She pet you once,
432
00:16:41,194 --> 00:16:42,561
but who sleeps on her bed every night?
433
00:16:42,629 --> 00:16:43,896
I'm looking at you, Jellybeans.
434
00:16:43,964 --> 00:16:45,865
Thanks a lot, bro.
We owe you one.
435
00:16:45,933 --> 00:16:47,066
No problem.
436
00:16:47,134 --> 00:16:48,534
How's your leg?
437
00:16:48,601 --> 00:16:52,404
I, um, gotta get surgery on Saturday.
438
00:16:52,472 --> 00:16:54,240
But Saturday is...
Yeah.
439
00:16:54,308 --> 00:16:57,210
Which means we're losing the
Bay Club and all our deposits.
440
00:16:57,278 --> 00:16:58,745
Plus, my dress is ruined.
441
00:16:58,813 --> 00:17:00,446
We're just gonna get married
442
00:17:00,514 --> 00:17:02,148
in a civil ceremony at the courthouse.
443
00:17:02,216 --> 00:17:04,017
But what about my walk down the aisle?
444
00:17:04,085 --> 00:17:06,186
I'm so sorry.
445
00:17:06,253 --> 00:17:07,420
Ah, don't be.
446
00:17:07,488 --> 00:17:08,955
I still get to marry
447
00:17:09,023 --> 00:17:11,692
the nicest, prettiest
girl in the world,
448
00:17:11,760 --> 00:17:13,093
and spend my life with her, too.
449
00:17:13,161 --> 00:17:14,428
Aw...
450
00:17:14,496 --> 00:17:16,197
That's just the painkillers talking.
451
00:17:17,633 --> 00:17:21,635
No, it's not, Jenna-ration X.
452
00:17:21,703 --> 00:17:23,737
(Jenna laughs)
453
00:17:23,804 --> 00:17:25,305
You're not getting married
at the courthouse.
454
00:17:27,141 --> 00:17:28,575
I'm throwing you a wedding.
455
00:17:28,643 --> 00:17:30,744
We can have it in my backyard.
456
00:17:30,812 --> 00:17:32,880
And Kristen has a beautiful
dress that you can borrow.
457
00:17:32,947 --> 00:17:34,682
Ryan, that's so sweet, but...
458
00:17:34,749 --> 00:17:36,550
I won't take no for an answer.
459
00:17:36,618 --> 00:17:39,420
Nothing would make me happier
than to watch the two of you
460
00:17:39,487 --> 00:17:40,654
walk down that aisle together.
461
00:17:43,291 --> 00:17:45,259
(screams, laughs)
462
00:17:45,327 --> 00:17:46,861
Thank you so much, Ryan!
463
00:17:46,928 --> 00:17:48,562
(giggling)
464
00:17:48,630 --> 00:17:50,965
Oh!
465
00:17:51,033 --> 00:17:52,433
And don't worry, Wilfred.
466
00:17:52,500 --> 00:17:53,734
You can walk down that aisle, too.
467
00:17:53,802 --> 00:17:55,637
(screams)
468
00:17:55,704 --> 00:17:57,172
Uh, thanks, Ryan.
469
00:17:57,239 --> 00:17:58,640
JENNA:
We should get you inside.
470
00:17:58,707 --> 00:18:00,909
Thank you, Ryan.
471
00:18:06,616 --> 00:18:08,383
Look at them.
472
00:18:08,451 --> 00:18:10,719
So happy together.
473
00:18:12,155 --> 00:18:13,956
I hope I can be lucky enough
474
00:18:14,023 --> 00:18:15,857
to have something like that one day.
475
00:18:15,925 --> 00:18:18,160
JENNA:
Wilfred!
476
00:18:19,195 --> 00:18:21,430
That's up to you, mate.
477
00:18:46,701 --> 00:18:49,069
Ryan, I redid Drew's vows.
478
00:18:49,137 --> 00:18:51,886
Um, do you mind if I just
bounce them off you?
479
00:18:52,006 --> 00:18:55,208
Sure.
480
00:18:55,276 --> 00:18:59,346
"Jenna, you've got a smile,
it seems to me,
481
00:18:59,414 --> 00:19:02,048
"reminds me of childhood memories,
482
00:19:02,116 --> 00:19:03,817
"where everything was as fresh
483
00:19:03,884 --> 00:19:05,418
as the bright blue sky."
484
00:19:05,486 --> 00:19:07,153
You wrote that?
485
00:19:07,221 --> 00:19:09,122
Yeah, I did.
486
00:19:09,189 --> 00:19:10,356
It's beautiful.
487
00:19:10,424 --> 00:19:11,891
Keep going.
488
00:19:11,958 --> 00:19:15,027
"Now and then when I see your face,
489
00:19:15,095 --> 00:19:17,474
"you take me away to
that special place,
490
00:19:17,772 --> 00:19:19,130
and if I stay too long..."
491
00:19:19,198 --> 00:19:22,300
Wait. Wait, those are the lyrics
to "Sweet Child O' Mine."
492
00:19:22,368 --> 00:19:24,135
No, they're not.
493
00:19:24,203 --> 00:19:26,715
This comes from the heart.
494
00:19:27,539 --> 00:19:29,807
"Guitar solo?"
495
00:19:32,477 --> 00:19:34,611
I'll just keep working on 'em.
496
00:19:37,015 --> 00:19:39,216
I guess I'd want it
to be when I'm really old,
497
00:19:39,283 --> 00:19:41,484
surrounded by my family.
498
00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:44,719
I'd close my eyes,
499
00:19:44,955 --> 00:19:46,841
and... drift away.
500
00:19:48,759 --> 00:19:51,362
What about you?
501
00:19:51,429 --> 00:19:55,365
I was seeing it more like
five or six years from now,
502
00:19:55,433 --> 00:19:59,103
after the fall of society,
when robots rule the earth,
503
00:19:59,170 --> 00:20:01,371
and, like, the zoos have fallen apart
504
00:20:01,439 --> 00:20:04,908
so the animals are, like,
viciously hunting people down.
505
00:20:04,976 --> 00:20:07,978
And this leopard finds you
in this mud hole...
506
00:20:08,046 --> 00:20:09,413
Finds me?
507
00:20:09,481 --> 00:20:11,849
Yeah, hiding from the robots
508
00:20:11,917 --> 00:20:13,485
who sodomized your sister.
509
00:20:13,552 --> 00:20:15,753
And the leopard, he just like
bites your head off.
510
00:20:15,821 --> 00:20:17,655
Wait, I thought we were
talking about ways that
511
00:20:17,723 --> 00:20:19,658
we wanted to die.
512
00:20:19,725 --> 00:20:23,376
No, we... we're talking about
ways we want you to die.
513
00:20:26,566 --> 00:20:29,167
I don't want to die.
514
00:20:29,235 --> 00:20:39,392
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
515
00:20:39,512 --> 00:20:41,147
Is this my T-shirt?
516
00:20:41,214 --> 00:20:42,381
Oh, yeah.
517
00:20:42,449 --> 00:20:43,616
You can have that back now.
518
00:20:43,684 --> 00:20:45,017
Thanks.
519
00:20:45,085 --> 00:20:46,319
Is it dirty?
520
00:20:46,387 --> 00:20:47,821
Did you pull it out of the laundry?
521
00:20:47,888 --> 00:20:50,090
I was lonely this morning,
522
00:20:50,157 --> 00:20:53,594
and I wanted something near me
that smelt like you,
523
00:20:53,661 --> 00:20:55,463
so I took the T-shirt
524
00:20:55,530 --> 00:20:56,731
out of the laundry basket
525
00:20:56,798 --> 00:20:59,300
and I snuggled up with it.
526
00:20:59,368 --> 00:21:00,635
Wow.
527
00:21:00,703 --> 00:21:02,237
That's actually kind of sweet.
528
00:21:02,304 --> 00:21:04,539
And made love on it.
529
00:21:04,589 --> 00:21:09,139
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