Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:12,102 --> 00:00:15,004
Where's your ex?
2
00:00:15,072 --> 00:00:16,672
She's been out sick all week.
3
00:00:16,740 --> 00:00:18,841
Oh... oh, I get it.
4
00:00:18,909 --> 00:00:20,409
(Chuckles)
5
00:00:20,477 --> 00:00:22,044
She's all embarrassed
to show her face now
6
00:00:22,112 --> 00:00:24,413
'cause you tapped it
and scrapped it, right?
7
00:00:24,481 --> 00:00:26,148
You down with O.P.P.?
8
00:00:26,216 --> 00:00:27,483
Wilfred:
Sorry, sorry...
9
00:00:27,551 --> 00:00:29,552
Sorry I'm late, everyone.
Sorry.
10
00:00:29,619 --> 00:00:30,953
Jen. Hair looks great today.
11
00:00:31,021 --> 00:00:31,872
Whoa...
12
00:00:32,072 --> 00:00:33,639
Scotty boy!
13
00:00:33,707 --> 00:00:35,007
Did you see the bachelorette
last night?
14
00:00:35,075 --> 00:00:36,008
Brutal.
15
00:00:36,076 --> 00:00:37,076
(Laughing)
16
00:00:37,143 --> 00:00:38,244
Jeremy:
Okay.
17
00:00:38,311 --> 00:00:40,646
Listen up.
18
00:00:40,714 --> 00:00:42,414
This morning, Kanner-McKay
announced the results
19
00:00:42,482 --> 00:00:46,252
of their phase three trials
of their cancer drug...
20
00:00:46,319 --> 00:00:48,420
Ahead of schedule, and, uh...
21
00:00:48,422 --> 00:00:50,889
Well, what can I say?
22
00:00:50,957 --> 00:00:52,157
We lost.
23
00:00:52,225 --> 00:00:53,993
(All sighing)
24
00:00:54,060 --> 00:00:55,194
They beat us.
25
00:00:55,262 --> 00:00:57,796
All of our investors have, uh...
26
00:00:57,864 --> 00:00:59,131
Jumped ship.
27
00:00:59,199 --> 00:01:01,734
What?
Oh, no, no..
28
00:01:01,801 --> 00:01:03,035
(Murmuring) We're screwed.
29
00:01:03,103 --> 00:01:05,704
Me, speaking,
you, quieting down.
30
00:01:05,772 --> 00:01:07,006
Go.
31
00:01:07,073 --> 00:01:09,208
(Slurping)
32
00:01:09,276 --> 00:01:12,811
Ah...
33
00:01:12,879 --> 00:01:14,079
Now, I know that you're all
worried about your jobs.
34
00:01:14,147 --> 00:01:16,048
And I understand that.
35
00:01:16,116 --> 00:01:17,283
But my grandfather
36
00:01:17,350 --> 00:01:20,052
was once trapped
37
00:01:20,120 --> 00:01:21,920
inside a mine
38
00:01:21,988 --> 00:01:23,656
for 15 days.
39
00:01:25,258 --> 00:01:26,925
And everyone around him
40
00:01:26,993 --> 00:01:29,628
had lost hope.
41
00:01:29,696 --> 00:01:30,929
But not my pepaw.
42
00:01:36,034 --> 00:01:38,202
"us.
43
00:01:38,270 --> 00:01:40,872
"Digging out of here.
44
00:01:40,939 --> 00:01:42,440
Go."
45
00:01:43,243 --> 00:01:44,543
And ten years later,
46
00:01:44,611 --> 00:01:46,879
he owned that mine!
47
00:01:46,946 --> 00:01:48,380
(Murmuring)
48
00:01:48,448 --> 00:01:49,915
And my grandfather
49
00:01:49,983 --> 00:01:52,451
never gave up hope,
and neither should you.
50
00:01:52,519 --> 00:01:54,153
You should refuse
51
00:01:54,220 --> 00:01:55,988
to see this situation
as a defeat...
52
00:01:56,055 --> 00:01:58,357
But rather
53
00:01:58,425 --> 00:01:59,858
as an opportunity
54
00:01:59,926 --> 00:02:02,795
to do something even better,
even bigger!
55
00:02:02,862 --> 00:02:05,330
(Excited murmurs)
Because this I know:
56
00:02:05,398 --> 00:02:09,802
You will dig yourselves
out of this mine,
57
00:02:09,869 --> 00:02:12,171
and you will emerge
even stronger,
58
00:02:12,238 --> 00:02:16,608
and you will change the world!
59
00:02:16,676 --> 00:02:18,177
(Cheering)
60
00:02:18,244 --> 00:02:19,711
Baby!
61
00:02:19,779 --> 00:02:22,214
(Whooping)
Now, if you'll excuse me,
62
00:02:22,282 --> 00:02:25,551
I need to call the wife.
63
00:02:25,618 --> 00:02:27,019
(Laughing)
64
00:02:27,086 --> 00:02:28,787
Aw, man!
65
00:02:28,855 --> 00:02:31,156
That was some
inspirational shit!
66
00:02:31,224 --> 00:02:34,092
First I'm like, "I cannot afford
to lose this job right now,"
67
00:02:34,160 --> 00:02:36,228
but it's just like Jeremy said,
you know? We gotta...
68
00:02:36,296 --> 00:02:38,030
(Gunshot)
69
00:02:38,097 --> 00:02:40,332
(Radio chatter)
70
00:02:41,668 --> 00:02:43,168
Man.
71
00:02:43,236 --> 00:02:44,770
When someone shoots
themselves in the face,
72
00:02:44,838 --> 00:02:48,273
it's just like... Dude.
73
00:02:48,341 --> 00:02:50,042
I don't want to cast
a darker shadow
74
00:02:50,109 --> 00:02:51,844
on an already tragic day,
75
00:02:51,911 --> 00:02:55,314
but I think someone may have
eaten part of Jeremy's brains.
76
00:03:01,988 --> 00:03:05,457
(Water bubbling)
77
00:03:05,525 --> 00:03:07,793
(Ringtone playing)
78
00:03:10,263 --> 00:03:12,531
(Sighs)
79
00:03:13,700 --> 00:03:16,034
Hey, kristen.
80
00:03:16,102 --> 00:03:17,669
Uh, thanks for ignoring
my calls all morning.
81
00:03:17,737 --> 00:03:19,037
Where have you been?
82
00:03:19,105 --> 00:03:21,507
Oh. Right.
Your checkup thing.
83
00:03:21,574 --> 00:03:23,242
That's right, Ryan,
my checkup thing.
84
00:03:23,309 --> 00:03:25,544
For my pregnancy thing, which
you are now 30 minutes late for.
85
00:03:25,612 --> 00:03:27,579
You said you'd be here, Ryan.
People in the waiting room
86
00:03:27,647 --> 00:03:29,715
were looking at me
like I was a slut.
87
00:03:29,782 --> 00:03:32,684
It's just... I'm not in
a good place right now.
88
00:03:32,752 --> 00:03:34,319
Everything went to shit
two weeks ago, and...
89
00:03:34,387 --> 00:03:35,687
That's right, Ryan.
90
00:03:35,755 --> 00:03:37,256
That was two whole weeks.
Move on.
91
00:03:37,323 --> 00:03:39,124
Scott, that is not
my vagina! Look,
92
00:03:39,192 --> 00:03:40,325
I need you to be here for me.
93
00:03:40,393 --> 00:03:41,493
I do not want to be all alone
94
00:03:41,561 --> 00:03:43,262
in that delivery room.
95
00:03:43,329 --> 00:03:44,963
Can't you just...
Ask someone else?
96
00:03:45,031 --> 00:03:46,164
Thanks for nothing, Ryan.
97
00:03:47,567 --> 00:03:49,368
Uh-oh.
98
00:03:49,435 --> 00:03:51,703
Jenna's out of town.
99
00:03:51,771 --> 00:03:54,740
Two single boys with no jobs
and nothing to do, whoo-hoo!
100
00:03:54,807 --> 00:03:57,509
Come on, let's get started.
I don't feel like going out.
101
00:03:57,577 --> 00:04:00,145
But you've been sitting on your
ass doing nothing all week.
102
00:04:00,213 --> 00:04:01,446
So?
103
00:04:01,514 --> 00:04:03,382
My life sucks right now.
104
00:04:03,449 --> 00:04:05,884
Look, I wish I could press
the reset button, but I can't.
105
00:04:05,952 --> 00:04:07,519
I'm just trying
to take care of myself.
106
00:04:07,587 --> 00:04:09,121
Yeah.
107
00:04:09,188 --> 00:04:10,789
And judging by the rigidity
of your load sock,
108
00:04:10,857 --> 00:04:12,624
you've been taking care
of yourself quite a bit.
109
00:04:12,692 --> 00:04:14,593
What do you want?
Look...
110
00:04:14,661 --> 00:04:16,662
You're depressed.
I get it.
111
00:04:16,729 --> 00:04:18,564
You know what I do
when I'm feeling down?
112
00:04:18,631 --> 00:04:21,266
I get outside myself and
do some good in the world.
113
00:04:21,334 --> 00:04:23,669
(Scoffs) Yeah, right. I do.
114
00:04:23,736 --> 00:04:25,938
Remember when I mauled that black
teenager's face the other day?
115
00:04:26,005 --> 00:04:28,173
You think I did that because
he had ice cream on his cheek?
116
00:04:28,241 --> 00:04:29,942
No. I did it because
117
00:04:30,009 --> 00:04:32,077
I hoped it would help him
go on to be the next seal.
118
00:04:32,145 --> 00:04:34,613
Wait, you did what?
It's called service, Ryan.
119
00:04:34,681 --> 00:04:36,348
And you can start by
making me breakfast.
120
00:04:36,416 --> 00:04:38,517
I usually eat at 9:15 sharp,
121
00:04:38,585 --> 00:04:40,786
and it's already
approaching... 9:17!
122
00:04:40,853 --> 00:04:42,321
Come on, I'm kind of
freaking out here.
123
00:04:42,388 --> 00:04:44,656
(Phone chirps)
124
00:04:49,195 --> 00:04:51,330
(Sighs)
125
00:04:51,397 --> 00:04:54,399
This is why we had
to rush over here... her cat?
126
00:04:56,569 --> 00:05:00,138
I appreciate you both
coming on such short notice.
127
00:05:00,206 --> 00:05:02,207
There, there, mum.
128
00:05:02,275 --> 00:05:04,343
Oh, wilfred.
129
00:05:06,779 --> 00:05:09,881
Uh, okay, the thing is...
and it's not a big deal...
130
00:05:09,949 --> 00:05:12,784
it's just, I like
to have my paw on top.
131
00:05:15,388 --> 00:05:17,556
I know how much
mittens meant to you.
132
00:05:17,624 --> 00:05:20,158
She was my best friend.
133
00:05:20,226 --> 00:05:23,295
Okay, uh, maybe you didn't
hear me the first time.
134
00:05:23,363 --> 00:05:25,263
And again, it's not
a big deal, uh, but...
135
00:05:25,331 --> 00:05:27,265
I usually have my paw on top.
136
00:05:27,333 --> 00:05:29,868
Don't know how I can be
any more clear about that.
137
00:05:29,936 --> 00:05:31,637
(Sobs quietly)
138
00:05:31,704 --> 00:05:34,072
As you can see,
I'm kind of a mess right now.
139
00:05:34,140 --> 00:05:36,108
Look, I...
140
00:05:36,175 --> 00:05:39,544
Be cool, wilfred.
She's grieving.
141
00:05:39,612 --> 00:05:41,613
Sorry for your loss.
142
00:05:41,681 --> 00:05:44,416
Thank you, sweetheart.
143
00:05:44,484 --> 00:05:46,284
You are just glowing
144
00:05:46,352 --> 00:05:48,553
with the spirit of motherhood.
145
00:05:48,621 --> 00:05:50,422
Thanks.
146
00:05:50,490 --> 00:05:52,991
So is the baby a mulatto?
147
00:05:53,059 --> 00:05:55,293
What? No, mom.
148
00:05:55,361 --> 00:05:58,430
So you're no longer
exclusively into black love?
149
00:05:58,498 --> 00:06:00,565
Is that what
you're trying to tell me?
150
00:06:00,633 --> 00:06:02,000
You know what?
151
00:06:02,068 --> 00:06:03,902
Uh, kristen could
really use some help
152
00:06:03,970 --> 00:06:06,104
preparing for the baby.
Ryan.
153
00:06:06,172 --> 00:06:08,907
Ryan: I mean, that's what I
do when I'm feeling down.
154
00:06:08,975 --> 00:06:11,543
I get outside myself and
do some good in the world.
155
00:06:11,611 --> 00:06:13,779
Hey, you stole my line.
156
00:06:13,846 --> 00:06:16,448
You know what I say to people
when they steal my lines?
157
00:06:16,516 --> 00:06:18,250
I say, "hey, hey, hey",
158
00:06:18,317 --> 00:06:20,585
it's fat Albert."
159
00:06:22,488 --> 00:06:24,489
Kristen,
160
00:06:24,557 --> 00:06:28,026
I-I would love to help you
with your baby.
161
00:06:29,462 --> 00:06:31,363
I delivered mitten's kittens.
162
00:06:31,431 --> 00:06:33,298
Most of them lived.
163
00:06:33,366 --> 00:06:36,468
It would be so wonderful
to be there for you.
164
00:06:36,536 --> 00:06:39,271
Um, well...
165
00:06:39,338 --> 00:06:42,007
I could use all the help
I can get.
166
00:06:46,479 --> 00:06:47,612
Watch the baby.
167
00:06:50,550 --> 00:06:52,050
It's a terrible idea.
168
00:06:52,118 --> 00:06:54,252
I wouldn't recommend her
leaving the grounds.
169
00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:55,520
In fact, I think
we should discuss
170
00:06:55,588 --> 00:06:57,522
a more managed care situation.
171
00:06:57,590 --> 00:06:59,124
But I thought she
was getting better.
172
00:06:59,192 --> 00:07:01,226
Well, some people take
a turn for the worse,
173
00:07:01,294 --> 00:07:03,028
especially after losing
someone close to them.
174
00:07:03,096 --> 00:07:04,763
Even if it was a cat.
175
00:07:04,831 --> 00:07:07,466
Mom's gonna be crushed.
176
00:07:07,533 --> 00:07:10,302
Look, she's been
very resistant to this idea.
177
00:07:10,369 --> 00:07:12,337
It would really help
ease the transition
178
00:07:12,405 --> 00:07:14,272
if one of you
could convince her
179
00:07:14,340 --> 00:07:16,374
that this is
in her best interest.
180
00:07:19,679 --> 00:07:21,546
(Scoffs)
181
00:07:23,449 --> 00:07:25,050
I know this is difficult.
182
00:07:25,118 --> 00:07:27,185
And if you need to talk
to someone,
183
00:07:27,253 --> 00:07:29,321
here's the number
of a good therapist.
184
00:07:29,388 --> 00:07:31,156
He really helped me
through a tough time
185
00:07:31,224 --> 00:07:32,891
after I was...
186
00:07:32,959 --> 00:07:35,026
Raped.
187
00:07:35,094 --> 00:07:36,561
(Laughs)
188
00:07:39,232 --> 00:07:41,099
Hmm.
189
00:07:43,035 --> 00:07:44,936
Shall I show you
our managed care facility?
190
00:07:45,004 --> 00:07:46,705
Wilfred:
Ryan, I know the timing
191
00:07:46,773 --> 00:07:48,206
couldn't possibly be any worse,
192
00:07:48,274 --> 00:07:49,775
but I think someone may have
193
00:07:49,842 --> 00:07:52,444
dug up mittens and eaten
part of the corpse.
194
00:07:52,512 --> 00:07:54,112
(Inhales sharply)
195
00:07:54,180 --> 00:07:55,680
Kristen:
Come on, Ryan.
196
00:07:55,748 --> 00:07:56,782
Catherine:
Did Dr. Cahill
197
00:07:56,849 --> 00:07:59,284
talk to you about that...
198
00:07:59,352 --> 00:08:01,553
Managed care thing?
199
00:08:01,621 --> 00:08:03,822
Yeah.
200
00:08:03,890 --> 00:08:06,825
Well, what do you think?
Do you think I'm that crazy?
201
00:08:06,893 --> 00:08:08,860
Of course not.
202
00:08:08,928 --> 00:08:12,430
But he is the doctor, right?
203
00:08:15,067 --> 00:08:16,735
Do you remember that?
204
00:08:16,803 --> 00:08:19,237
When I used to help you paint?
205
00:08:19,305 --> 00:08:20,372
Yeah.
206
00:08:20,439 --> 00:08:21,540
(Both laugh)
207
00:08:21,607 --> 00:08:23,408
You were so talented.
208
00:08:23,476 --> 00:08:26,144
You had such a gift
that I gave you.
209
00:08:26,212 --> 00:08:28,780
And now you kids
are all grown up
210
00:08:28,848 --> 00:08:30,682
and you don't need me any more.
211
00:08:30,750 --> 00:08:33,685
Of course, when you did need me,
212
00:08:33,753 --> 00:08:36,521
I really wasn't there.
213
00:08:36,589 --> 00:08:38,957
I will always regret that.
214
00:08:39,025 --> 00:08:40,525
But...
215
00:08:40,593 --> 00:08:42,928
Taking care of mittens,
216
00:08:42,995 --> 00:08:44,963
that...
217
00:08:45,031 --> 00:08:47,966
Made me feel useful.
218
00:08:48,034 --> 00:08:49,734
And now that she's dead...
219
00:08:53,606 --> 00:08:54,973
Sometimes when
220
00:08:55,041 --> 00:08:56,641
your father was
221
00:08:56,709 --> 00:08:58,910
yelling at me about,
222
00:08:58,978 --> 00:09:02,080
I don't know,
spoons or whatever,
223
00:09:02,148 --> 00:09:04,516
I had this fantasy
224
00:09:04,584 --> 00:09:06,751
of just escaping
225
00:09:06,819 --> 00:09:08,653
and running away from it all.
226
00:09:08,721 --> 00:09:11,723
Like, actually running away.
227
00:09:11,791 --> 00:09:13,658
Just doing something for me.
228
00:09:13,726 --> 00:09:16,127
I've had thoughts like that.
229
00:09:16,195 --> 00:09:18,597
Leaving everything behind.
230
00:09:18,664 --> 00:09:20,365
All the pain, the bad memories.
231
00:09:20,433 --> 00:09:21,933
Yeah.
232
00:09:22,001 --> 00:09:23,869
Just hitting the road,
233
00:09:23,936 --> 00:09:26,104
popping in a bitching-ass
mix tape,
234
00:09:26,172 --> 00:09:28,139
and just being...
235
00:09:28,207 --> 00:09:30,041
Free.
Free.
236
00:09:30,109 --> 00:09:31,309
Have you lost
your mind? Mexico?
237
00:09:31,377 --> 00:09:32,677
You know they eat
dogs down there.
238
00:09:32,745 --> 00:09:34,579
They do not.
239
00:09:34,647 --> 00:09:36,748
What, you don't think
Mexico city has a Koreatown?
240
00:09:36,816 --> 00:09:38,950
Get in. I'm a creature
of habit, Ryan.
241
00:09:39,018 --> 00:09:40,986
I eat, sleep, and shit
on a very rigid schedule.
242
00:09:41,053 --> 00:09:43,588
You can't just take me out of my
routine. I'm not, I'm not going.
243
00:09:43,656 --> 00:09:44,656
(Sighs)
244
00:09:44,724 --> 00:09:47,192
Fine. Hasta la vista.
245
00:09:47,260 --> 00:09:48,827
Bullshit.
246
00:09:48,895 --> 00:09:51,229
We both know you're not
just gonna leave me here.
247
00:09:51,297 --> 00:09:54,232
All talk, just as I suspected.
248
00:09:54,300 --> 00:09:55,867
Now here's what's gonna happen.
249
00:09:55,935 --> 00:09:58,203
We're gonna ditch mom,
pick up some primo,
250
00:09:58,271 --> 00:09:59,638
head back to your place...
251
00:10:01,274 --> 00:10:03,541
Goddamn you, Ryan.
Shotgun.
252
00:10:11,510 --> 00:10:13,444
Catherine:
Whoo!
253
00:10:13,512 --> 00:10:15,546
We're free!
254
00:10:15,614 --> 00:10:18,383
Celebrate through
dance with me, Ryan.
255
00:10:18,450 --> 00:10:19,717
Wilfred:
This is torture.
256
00:10:19,785 --> 00:10:21,052
Long car rides
are animal cruelty.
257
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,754
(Laughs) (Laughs)
258
00:10:22,821 --> 00:10:25,023
Don't think I can be distracted
with all this fun wind.
259
00:10:25,090 --> 00:10:28,226
Yeah! Wind!
260
00:10:28,294 --> 00:10:31,396
Apparently someone doesn't know
the rules of shotgun.
261
00:10:31,463 --> 00:10:33,965
Do you think wilfred's
safe back there?
262
00:10:34,033 --> 00:10:36,167
Wilfred, sit down. I don't need to sit.
Anyone who knows
263
00:10:36,235 --> 00:10:37,835
anything about dogs knows
that we have perfect balance.
264
00:10:37,903 --> 00:10:39,137
In fact,
265
00:10:39,204 --> 00:10:40,738
there is no physical force
that can even...
266
00:10:40,806 --> 00:10:41,539
(Tires squeal) (Grunts)
267
00:10:41,607 --> 00:10:42,774
Ooh, ooh, oh,
268
00:10:42,841 --> 00:10:44,242
there's an organic fruit stand
269
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:45,910
up ahead that's built
on what I believe to be
270
00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:48,079
a vortex energy field.
271
00:10:48,147 --> 00:10:50,281
Do you mind if we stop there?
272
00:10:50,349 --> 00:10:53,151
Hey, it's not like we've
got anywhere to be.
273
00:10:53,218 --> 00:10:55,219
Wilfred: Oh, hilarious.
I have my regular
274
00:10:55,287 --> 00:10:57,255
sun spot nap at 1:30.
I need to be there
275
00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:58,723
a few minutes early
for pre-nap stretching
276
00:10:58,791 --> 00:11:01,159
and my yawn-squeaks.
277
00:11:01,226 --> 00:11:02,393
This reminds me
278
00:11:02,461 --> 00:11:04,562
of those road trips
we used to take.
279
00:11:04,630 --> 00:11:06,831
Hey, do you remember that time
we drove to lake Tahoe,
280
00:11:06,899 --> 00:11:07,765
and kristen wouldn't speak
281
00:11:07,833 --> 00:11:09,801
to me for two days
282
00:11:09,868 --> 00:11:11,569
because I said
she could be president
283
00:11:11,637 --> 00:11:13,004
of the itty bitty
titty committee?
284
00:11:13,072 --> 00:11:14,806
(Both chuckle)
285
00:11:14,873 --> 00:11:17,642
The kids were
so cute back then.
286
00:11:17,710 --> 00:11:19,277
The kids?
287
00:11:19,345 --> 00:11:21,846
Oh. Uh! Brain toot!
(Blows raspberry)
288
00:11:21,914 --> 00:11:25,383
I meant you and your sister.
(Chuckles)
289
00:11:25,451 --> 00:11:27,685
Ryan, turn this car around now!
Calm down, wilfred!
290
00:11:27,753 --> 00:11:30,221
Don't tell me to calm down!
It's your fault that I'm...
291
00:11:30,289 --> 00:11:31,923
(Tires squeal) Aah!
292
00:11:31,991 --> 00:11:34,892
The energy vortex is
strong here, Ryan.
293
00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:37,061
I have not experienced
294
00:11:37,129 --> 00:11:40,064
geomagnetic rejuvenation
like this since...
295
00:11:40,132 --> 00:11:41,399
I don't know when.
296
00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:44,435
Look at my mom.
297
00:11:44,503 --> 00:11:46,771
She's never been so happy. You really
think you're helping her, Ryan?
298
00:11:46,839 --> 00:11:49,574
Shouldn't your wife
be in managed care?
299
00:11:49,641 --> 00:11:51,009
Whoops! Brain toot!
300
00:11:51,076 --> 00:11:52,977
(Blows raspberry)
I meant your mother.
301
00:11:53,045 --> 00:11:55,580
So she misspoke.
It was nothing.
302
00:11:55,647 --> 00:11:59,083
We got to go back, mate.
303
00:11:59,151 --> 00:12:00,451
No.
304
00:12:00,519 --> 00:12:02,120
All right.
305
00:12:02,187 --> 00:12:04,956
But don't pretend
you're doing this for her.
306
00:12:05,024 --> 00:12:06,991
(Ringtone plays)
307
00:12:10,462 --> 00:12:11,729
Hello.
308
00:12:11,797 --> 00:12:13,364
Kristen:
Where the hell have you been?!
309
00:12:13,432 --> 00:12:15,633
I'm just on a little road trip
with mom.
310
00:12:15,701 --> 00:12:17,268
A little road trip?
311
00:12:17,336 --> 00:12:19,237
You disappeared with our
mentally unstable mother!
312
00:12:19,304 --> 00:12:24,042
She's not mentally unstable.
She's just... eccentric.
313
00:12:24,109 --> 00:12:26,711
Well, imagine how "eccentric"
mom's gonna get
314
00:12:26,779 --> 00:12:28,513
if she doesn't take
her mood stabilizers.
315
00:12:28,580 --> 00:12:30,281
I'll make sure
she takes her meds.
316
00:12:30,349 --> 00:12:31,282
Hang on.
317
00:12:37,222 --> 00:12:39,924
Is that kitty litter?
318
00:12:39,992 --> 00:12:42,360
There's still
turds in it! Dibs!
319
00:12:42,428 --> 00:12:44,062
What the hell, dude?
I called dibs.
320
00:12:44,129 --> 00:12:45,663
She-she doesn't have her
medication with her.
321
00:12:45,731 --> 00:12:47,932
Of course not!
They dispense them here
322
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:50,568
because... oh, that's right,
she's mentally unstable.
323
00:12:50,636 --> 00:12:52,737
I'll call you back.
324
00:12:52,805 --> 00:12:55,873
Hey, hey, mind if I drive?
325
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:57,308
Uh... Come on! Get in the car!
326
00:12:57,376 --> 00:12:59,444
If we make it
to Victorville by sundown,
327
00:12:59,511 --> 00:13:02,146
I know a place
that rents stilts... cheap.
328
00:13:02,214 --> 00:13:03,915
(Plays "shave and a haircut")
329
00:13:03,982 --> 00:13:06,851
(Humming)
330
00:13:06,919 --> 00:13:10,354
Uh, listen,
I just talked to kristen,
331
00:13:10,422 --> 00:13:12,423
and she seems pretty worried.
332
00:13:12,491 --> 00:13:14,258
We've had a fun day, right?
333
00:13:14,326 --> 00:13:16,394
Maybe we should just head back.
334
00:13:16,462 --> 00:13:18,362
About time!
335
00:13:18,430 --> 00:13:20,665
Very funny, Ryan.
336
00:13:20,732 --> 00:13:25,002
Oh! Oh... you know where
we should stay tonight?
337
00:13:25,070 --> 00:13:27,905
I know the the most charming
little nudist hostel
338
00:13:27,973 --> 00:13:29,674
just outside Rosarito.
339
00:13:29,741 --> 00:13:30,908
That's it!
340
00:13:30,976 --> 00:13:31,909
I can't take it any more!
341
00:13:31,977 --> 00:13:32,977
Turn this bloody car around!
342
00:13:33,045 --> 00:13:33,978
It's bad enough
343
00:13:34,046 --> 00:13:35,780
mum is losing her mind,
344
00:13:35,848 --> 00:13:37,982
but now little Emily down
the street will go outside
345
00:13:38,050 --> 00:13:40,451
to play at 3:35 and not get
tail-whipped in the face!
346
00:13:40,519 --> 00:13:42,186
Is that what you want,
you sick bastard?!
347
00:13:42,254 --> 00:13:43,321
(Siren wails)
348
00:13:43,388 --> 00:13:44,355
Ah...
Shit.
349
00:13:44,423 --> 00:13:46,424
Thank God!
350
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:47,458
(Sighs)
351
00:13:47,526 --> 00:13:48,960
Okay, Ryan, be cool.
352
00:13:49,027 --> 00:13:51,229
Just hide the bag of apples
under the seat.
353
00:13:51,296 --> 00:13:54,499
Why? Wait. Did you steal
this fruit?
354
00:13:54,566 --> 00:13:56,334
No, I did not steal the fruit.
355
00:13:56,401 --> 00:13:57,969
Fruit belongs to the
earth, and therefore,
356
00:13:58,036 --> 00:14:00,271
no human being has a right
to put a price on it.
357
00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:03,641
I did however steal this pen
from the cash register.
358
00:14:03,709 --> 00:14:05,343
Afternoon, officer.
359
00:14:05,410 --> 00:14:06,711
Wilfred:
Oh, thank God you're here.
360
00:14:06,778 --> 00:14:08,179
I'm being held hostage.
361
00:14:08,247 --> 00:14:09,480
My name is wilfred
Fazio Mueller,
362
00:14:09,548 --> 00:14:10,815
I live at 2200 ingmar drive...
363
00:14:10,883 --> 00:14:12,116
Cute dog.
Thank you.
364
00:14:12,184 --> 00:14:14,252
License and registration.
365
00:14:14,319 --> 00:14:16,687
Oh, gee, officer,
366
00:14:16,755 --> 00:14:18,789
I left my license at home...
367
00:14:18,857 --> 00:14:21,425
When I left there 20 years ago.
368
00:14:21,493 --> 00:14:23,294
Would you step out of the car,
ma'am?
369
00:14:23,362 --> 00:14:24,529
Ooh...
370
00:14:24,596 --> 00:14:27,598
Of course, officer.
No problem.
371
00:14:27,666 --> 00:14:29,433
Mom, what are you doing?!
372
00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:31,836
(Metal crunching)
373
00:14:31,904 --> 00:14:33,237
Mom!
374
00:14:33,305 --> 00:14:36,707
Victorville stilt shop or bust!
375
00:14:36,775 --> 00:14:38,109
Jesus, mom! Pull over!
376
00:14:38,177 --> 00:14:39,877
Why? This is exciting!
377
00:14:39,945 --> 00:14:43,781
I haven't been hassled
by the man since 1974.
378
00:14:43,849 --> 00:14:46,150
You just ran over
a cop's motorcycle!
379
00:14:46,218 --> 00:14:48,686
You're carrying around a purse
full of kitty litter!
380
00:14:48,754 --> 00:14:51,088
What, because I want
to keep a little piece
381
00:14:51,156 --> 00:14:53,191
of mittens with me,
that makes me crazy?
382
00:14:53,258 --> 00:14:54,792
What's crazy is
you not sharing.
383
00:14:54,860 --> 00:14:57,361
Just stop the car now!
384
00:14:57,429 --> 00:14:59,363
(Brakes squeak, Ryan sighs)
385
00:14:59,431 --> 00:15:01,999
Don't tell me
what to do, Henry.
386
00:15:02,067 --> 00:15:03,634
Henry?
387
00:15:03,702 --> 00:15:06,170
Mom, you know
I'm not dad, right?
388
00:15:10,042 --> 00:15:12,944
Yeah. Yeah, of
course I do.
389
00:15:13,011 --> 00:15:16,080
Mom... you're not well.
390
00:15:16,148 --> 00:15:18,583
Please... let me drive.
391
00:15:18,650 --> 00:15:20,952
Okay.
392
00:15:21,019 --> 00:15:22,453
(Sighs)
393
00:15:26,725 --> 00:15:29,594
You'll never control me, Henry!
Wait.
394
00:15:29,661 --> 00:15:31,395
Buckle up, sneakers! (Engine
revving, tires squealing)
395
00:15:31,463 --> 00:15:33,531
Mom! Wilfred: I'm not
sneakers, you crazy bitch.
396
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:36,367
Henry, help!
397
00:15:36,435 --> 00:15:38,402
(Tires squealing, Ryan sighs)
398
00:15:42,368 --> 00:15:44,969
Kristen:
I appreciate that, officer.
399
00:15:45,037 --> 00:15:46,871
Like I said,
she's off of her medication.
400
00:15:46,939 --> 00:15:49,407
If you find her first,
will you please let us know?
401
00:15:49,475 --> 00:15:51,309
Thank you so much.
It's a good thing
402
00:15:51,377 --> 00:15:53,211
you're a lawyer,
'cause mom's gonna need one.
403
00:15:53,278 --> 00:15:55,079
I get it. I messed up.
404
00:15:55,147 --> 00:15:57,215
Don't you think
I feel terrible about this?
405
00:15:57,282 --> 00:15:59,117
You should,
because this is a disaster.
406
00:15:59,184 --> 00:16:02,153
Wait. Make a left up here.
407
00:16:02,221 --> 00:16:04,422
(High-pitched mewing
of kittens)
408
00:16:10,529 --> 00:16:12,463
You want to do this?
409
00:16:12,531 --> 00:16:14,432
I... (Scoffs) Wilfred:
You got to help me!
410
00:16:14,500 --> 00:16:17,468
My name is wilfred Fazio Mue...
Oh, it's you.
411
00:16:17,536 --> 00:16:19,037
Hey, mom?
412
00:16:19,104 --> 00:16:20,805
Mom, it's kristen.
I'm gonna...
413
00:16:20,873 --> 00:16:23,641
Hi. I'm gonna need you to
take your medication, okay?
414
00:16:23,709 --> 00:16:26,944
Right. I'm sorry,
but you have to.
415
00:16:27,012 --> 00:16:28,946
You're my helper, remember?
416
00:16:29,014 --> 00:16:30,148
I can't help you.
417
00:16:30,215 --> 00:16:31,849
Ah.
I can't even
418
00:16:31,917 --> 00:16:33,518
help myself.
419
00:16:33,585 --> 00:16:36,988
We should just come up with
some wacky way for me to die.
420
00:16:37,056 --> 00:16:38,890
Okay, here you go,
mom. Take this.
421
00:16:38,957 --> 00:16:40,825
Jesus, mom!
422
00:16:40,893 --> 00:16:42,894
Look, I can't deal
with this right now!
423
00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:45,096
Shut the damn cat up
and take your medicine.
424
00:16:45,164 --> 00:16:46,831
Ow! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
425
00:16:46,899 --> 00:16:48,032
Oh, my God!
Are you okay?
426
00:16:48,100 --> 00:16:50,501
Do I look okay, Ryan?
427
00:16:50,569 --> 00:16:52,136
Oh, God, this is not happening!
428
00:16:52,204 --> 00:16:56,140
No, not now! Not in some
stupid hick's gross backyard!
429
00:16:56,208 --> 00:16:58,109
No offense!
430
00:16:58,177 --> 00:16:59,610
A towel or something?
431
00:16:59,678 --> 00:17:00,945
Shit, here comes the miracle!
432
00:17:01,013 --> 00:17:02,814
I'll-I'll
call 911!
433
00:17:02,881 --> 00:17:04,582
We're 50 Miles
from the nearest hospital, Ryan.
434
00:17:04,650 --> 00:17:06,517
You're gonna have
to help me through this, okay?
435
00:17:06,585 --> 00:17:08,152
(Sighs) Listen,
436
00:17:08,220 --> 00:17:09,720
I deliver babies for a living.
437
00:17:09,788 --> 00:17:11,789
You can do this,
but I need you to... ow!
438
00:17:11,857 --> 00:17:13,291
Did you not hear
what she said?!
439
00:17:13,358 --> 00:17:14,826
She needs your help, mate!
440
00:17:14,893 --> 00:17:16,394
I... I can't.
(Kristen panting)
441
00:17:16,462 --> 00:17:18,863
Ryan, I know you're depressed,
442
00:17:18,931 --> 00:17:21,799
and you don't want to think of
anyone but yourself right now,
443
00:17:21,867 --> 00:17:23,201
but that tainted whore
needs you.
444
00:17:23,268 --> 00:17:24,702
Ryan, please!
445
00:17:24,770 --> 00:17:26,370
For God's sake, go participate
446
00:17:26,438 --> 00:17:29,373
in the most beautiful experience
life has to offer,
447
00:17:29,441 --> 00:17:30,708
even if it means
looking directly
448
00:17:30,776 --> 00:17:32,276
into your own sister's
slop-hole.
449
00:17:32,344 --> 00:17:34,912
God! Oh!
450
00:17:34,980 --> 00:17:37,181
It's okay, kristen.
451
00:17:37,249 --> 00:17:39,083
(Sighs) I'm here.
452
00:17:39,151 --> 00:17:40,985
Everything's gonna be fine.
453
00:17:41,053 --> 00:17:43,988
Here, squeeze my hand, okay?
(Gasping)
454
00:17:44,056 --> 00:17:47,825
You're doing good, mittens.
455
00:17:47,893 --> 00:17:49,527
(Kitten mewing)
456
00:17:56,168 --> 00:17:57,869
(Baby cooing)
457
00:17:57,936 --> 00:17:59,470
Hi.
458
00:17:59,538 --> 00:18:02,640
I'm Ryan.
459
00:18:02,708 --> 00:18:04,976
I'm your Uncle.
460
00:18:12,084 --> 00:18:14,318
Are you feeling better, mom?
461
00:18:17,723 --> 00:18:19,991
(Baby cooing)
462
00:18:22,261 --> 00:18:25,796
You know, kristen's gonna
really need your help.
463
00:18:25,864 --> 00:18:29,200
And I was thinking
that maybe the best way
464
00:18:29,268 --> 00:18:33,404
to do that is for you to go back
and get the help that you need.
465
00:18:35,474 --> 00:18:37,909
I know.
466
00:18:37,976 --> 00:18:40,411
(Baby cooing)
467
00:18:43,849 --> 00:18:46,184
Careful.
468
00:18:46,251 --> 00:18:49,153
(Cooing)
469
00:18:52,491 --> 00:18:54,725
I'm a grandma.
470
00:18:54,793 --> 00:18:56,327
(Laughs)
471
00:18:59,031 --> 00:19:00,932
Listen, I hate
to be a Debbie downer,
472
00:19:00,999 --> 00:19:02,934
especially in the midst
of all this joy,
473
00:19:03,001 --> 00:19:05,937
but I think someone may have
eaten kristen's placenta.
474
00:19:06,004 --> 00:19:08,906
(Sucks in through teeth)
475
00:19:08,974 --> 00:19:10,641
(Cooing)
476
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:18,368
I won't be too long, I promise.
Take your time.
477
00:19:18,436 --> 00:19:20,670
I was able to get patches
from up the street
478
00:19:20,738 --> 00:19:22,639
to cover Emily's
3:45 face-whipping.
479
00:19:22,707 --> 00:19:25,809
And my 4:30 Jenna
cuddle's been pushed.
480
00:19:25,877 --> 00:19:28,511
But if I'm not back by 6:30 A.M.
to bark at that garbage truck,
481
00:19:28,579 --> 00:19:31,381
I don't even want
to think about it.
482
00:19:31,449 --> 00:19:34,751
Go.
483
00:19:38,155 --> 00:19:39,756
Hey, mom.
484
00:19:39,824 --> 00:19:41,524
Ryan? Hey!
Hey.
485
00:19:41,592 --> 00:19:43,927
Oh, I-I... I don't want
to get paint on you.
486
00:19:43,995 --> 00:19:45,662
Oh, it's okay.
487
00:19:45,730 --> 00:19:48,899
So, how's your new, uh...
488
00:19:48,966 --> 00:19:51,968
Your new situation?
489
00:19:52,036 --> 00:19:54,237
Things are good.
490
00:19:54,305 --> 00:19:57,874
I've got a lot of mileage
out of the cop story.
491
00:19:57,942 --> 00:20:00,977
Um, I made a few
new friends, and
492
00:20:01,045 --> 00:20:02,279
they do everything for me here.
493
00:20:02,346 --> 00:20:04,347
I don't have to lift a finger.
494
00:20:04,415 --> 00:20:08,285
You know, I... I haven't
painted since I was a kid.
495
00:20:10,187 --> 00:20:12,355
You had a great eye.
496
00:20:12,423 --> 00:20:14,524
I had a great teacher.
497
00:20:30,641 --> 00:20:33,376
Sync and correction by Tony for
www.Addic7ed.Com
498
00:20:38,582 --> 00:20:40,784
(soft whimper)
499
00:20:43,421 --> 00:20:45,655
(Whimpering)
500
00:20:50,828 --> 00:20:52,529
(Grunts)
501
00:20:52,596 --> 00:20:54,230
(Panting)
502
00:20:54,298 --> 00:20:56,766
Another hilary swank dream?
503
00:20:56,834 --> 00:20:59,569
She was wearing a g-string
in this one.
504
00:20:59,637 --> 00:21:02,038
(Panting)
505
00:21:02,106 --> 00:21:04,407
(Voice breaking):
Ryan, it was so real.
506
00:21:04,457 --> 00:21:09,007
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
34904
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
