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Transcript by Addic7ed.com
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Hey.
3
00:00:16,599 --> 00:00:18,065
Why does everything
look different?
4
00:00:18,066 --> 00:00:19,800
And what have you
done with my hair?
5
00:00:19,801 --> 00:00:23,544
I distinctly remember leaving it
right here, all over the place.
6
00:00:23,545 --> 00:00:25,045
I'm cleaning up a little.
7
00:00:26,385 --> 00:00:28,320
Oh, what?
8
00:00:28,321 --> 00:00:30,157
'Cause you've stopped
smoking weed, I can't either?
9
00:00:30,158 --> 00:00:32,226
I'm trying to air
the place out.
10
00:00:32,227 --> 00:00:34,497
(yelling)
11
00:00:37,973 --> 00:00:39,173
(yelling)
12
00:00:39,174 --> 00:00:40,374
(vacuum cleaner dies)
13
00:00:40,375 --> 00:00:42,710
Sorry, Ryan!
14
00:00:42,711 --> 00:00:45,715
Rah! Die! Evil!
15
00:00:45,716 --> 00:00:49,018
Robot! (panting)
16
00:00:49,019 --> 00:00:51,787
It's dead.
17
00:00:55,591 --> 00:00:57,225
Ryan, it's been ten days.
18
00:00:57,226 --> 00:00:58,392
What are you trying to prove?
19
00:00:58,393 --> 00:01:00,394
I'm not trying
to prove anything.
20
00:01:00,395 --> 00:01:02,965
I just like feeling
clear-headed for a change.
21
00:01:02,966 --> 00:01:04,869
Now I've got more time
for things like
22
00:01:04,870 --> 00:01:06,637
catching up on my reading,
and learning yoga.
23
00:01:06,638 --> 00:01:08,006
- Yoga?
- Yeah.
24
00:01:08,007 --> 00:01:09,675
Kristen invited me
to one of her classes.
25
00:01:09,676 --> 00:01:11,477
Kristen?
26
00:01:11,478 --> 00:01:13,346
Exactly how long
is this pointless
27
00:01:13,347 --> 00:01:15,348
lifestyle experiment gonna last?
28
00:01:15,349 --> 00:01:17,884
I've made some positive
changes in my life.
29
00:01:17,885 --> 00:01:19,720
In fact, last night
I polished up
30
00:01:19,721 --> 00:01:21,188
- my résumé.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
31
00:01:21,189 --> 00:01:22,789
Easy does it.
32
00:01:22,790 --> 00:01:24,392
A job, Ryan?
33
00:01:24,393 --> 00:01:25,794
You really think
you're ready for that?
34
00:01:25,795 --> 00:01:27,596
Up there?
35
00:01:27,597 --> 00:01:29,432
I've never felt better.
36
00:01:29,433 --> 00:01:31,734
Why are you trying to
undermine my confidence?
37
00:01:31,735 --> 00:01:33,636
It's like you're
working against me.
38
00:01:33,637 --> 00:01:35,871
Working against you?
39
00:01:35,872 --> 00:01:37,406
Come on, mate.
40
00:01:37,407 --> 00:01:39,308
Have a little faith.
41
00:01:39,309 --> 00:01:40,342
Don't you think you're
being a bit paranoid?
42
00:01:42,412 --> 00:01:44,647
(Wilfred's voice fades
and echoes in background)
43
00:01:44,648 --> 00:01:46,015
Ryan, I know you've got your doubts.
But you're my best friend.
44
00:01:46,016 --> 00:01:47,984
I love you, mate.
45
00:01:47,985 --> 00:01:48,852
I'd never do anything to...
46
00:01:48,853 --> 00:01:50,455
Ryan.
47
00:01:50,456 --> 00:01:52,623
- Are you listening to me?
- Ah! What?
48
00:01:52,624 --> 00:01:54,659
I said I'd never do
anything to harm you.
49
00:02:00,833 --> 00:02:02,801
Mm.
50
00:02:02,802 --> 00:02:05,672
A whimsical,
light-bodied bouquet.
51
00:02:05,673 --> 00:02:09,343
Crisp, with a hint of peach.
52
00:02:09,344 --> 00:02:10,845
And a lingering,
rotten-egg finish.
53
00:02:10,846 --> 00:02:11,812
Exquisite.
54
00:02:11,813 --> 00:02:13,281
(breathes out)
55
00:02:13,282 --> 00:02:15,550
Boy, I needed this. I have
been so stressed lately.
56
00:02:15,551 --> 00:02:17,052
What's up?
57
00:02:17,053 --> 00:02:19,722
Dr. Ramos invited me to go
to India for four months
58
00:02:19,723 --> 00:02:21,290
to help him open his new clinic.
59
00:02:21,291 --> 00:02:22,892
Congratulations.
That's amazing.
60
00:02:22,893 --> 00:02:24,760
Well, Leo doesn't
want me to go.
61
00:02:24,761 --> 00:02:27,663
He says I won't be able
to adjust to a new culture.
62
00:02:27,664 --> 00:02:29,131
Excuse me, but I was the one
63
00:02:29,132 --> 00:02:30,532
who was willing to live
in the Valley.
64
00:02:30,533 --> 00:02:31,800
(Kristen's voice fades)
65
00:02:31,801 --> 00:02:33,869
Leo thinks I talk too much....
66
00:02:33,870 --> 00:02:36,238
We actually haven't
been talking.
67
00:02:36,239 --> 00:02:38,507
Communicating at all...
68
00:02:38,508 --> 00:02:40,876
Ryan.
69
00:02:40,877 --> 00:02:42,545
Hey. Do you see that guy?
70
00:02:44,582 --> 00:02:46,683
Who are you talking about?
71
00:02:46,684 --> 00:02:48,986
Never mind.
72
00:02:48,987 --> 00:02:51,322
Oh, Ryan, you have
to experience this.
73
00:02:51,323 --> 00:02:55,794
Leathery, with subtle
tones of menstruation.
74
00:02:55,795 --> 00:02:57,162
When this s opens up,
it's gonna be beautiful.
75
00:02:58,865 --> 00:03:00,465
I wasn't going to tell you,
76
00:03:00,466 --> 00:03:02,134
because you've been acting
so negative lately, but
77
00:03:02,135 --> 00:03:03,602
I'm going on a date
tomorrow night.
78
00:03:03,603 --> 00:03:05,170
A date? With who?
79
00:03:05,171 --> 00:03:07,573
No one. Just...
someone I met.
80
00:03:07,574 --> 00:03:08,640
Met where?
81
00:03:08,641 --> 00:03:10,409
Well, I...
82
00:03:13,713 --> 00:03:15,247
No.
83
00:03:17,083 --> 00:03:19,317
LoveMatchDating.com?
84
00:03:19,318 --> 00:03:21,520
Oh, my God.
85
00:03:21,521 --> 00:03:23,222
Please tell me that donkey-faced
thing with the braces
86
00:03:23,223 --> 00:03:24,590
is not the chick
you're going out with.
87
00:03:24,591 --> 00:03:26,292
She doesn't have braces.
88
00:03:26,293 --> 00:03:27,860
Yeah, you just can't see them,
89
00:03:27,861 --> 00:03:29,629
'cause they're probably
on her legs.
90
00:03:29,630 --> 00:03:31,064
How do you think she supports
that massive donkey face?
91
00:03:31,065 --> 00:03:32,799
I think she's a great
match for me.
92
00:03:32,800 --> 00:03:34,668
She's a partner
at a marketing firm,
93
00:03:34,669 --> 00:03:36,237
she enjoys fitness,
94
00:03:36,238 --> 00:03:37,972
and she's looking for a
long-term relationship.
95
00:03:37,973 --> 00:03:39,707
It's way too soon for that.
96
00:03:39,708 --> 00:03:41,676
Let me find you a nice
hit-it-and-quit-it chick.
97
00:03:44,180 --> 00:03:46,047
Gross.
98
00:03:46,048 --> 00:03:48,551
(sighs)
Out of your league.
99
00:03:48,552 --> 00:03:50,686
Lazy eye.
100
00:03:50,687 --> 00:03:52,956
Balding Asian grandmother.
101
00:03:52,957 --> 00:03:54,924
Gross!
102
00:03:54,925 --> 00:03:55,992
Ooh. Here we go.
103
00:03:55,993 --> 00:03:57,494
Angelique.
104
00:03:57,495 --> 00:03:58,895
Are you kidding?
105
00:03:58,896 --> 00:03:59,796
Are you kidding?
106
00:03:59,797 --> 00:04:02,433
"Favorite music: all types."
107
00:04:02,434 --> 00:04:04,468
This chick must be, like,
an expert in music.
108
00:04:05,471 --> 00:04:07,438
Ryan, wait.
Look.
109
00:04:07,439 --> 00:04:09,073
I get it.
110
00:04:09,074 --> 00:04:11,075
You're feeling better
about things.
111
00:04:11,076 --> 00:04:14,313
You're cleaning and yogaing
and not smoking,
112
00:04:14,314 --> 00:04:16,982
and life seems like one
big, fluffy, pink cloud.
113
00:04:16,983 --> 00:04:18,150
Yeah? So?
114
00:04:18,151 --> 00:04:19,885
It's not real.
115
00:04:19,886 --> 00:04:22,354
You think your demons
have vanished, but...
116
00:04:22,355 --> 00:04:24,255
that's a lie, mate.
117
00:04:24,256 --> 00:04:27,358
No offense, but I think I know
myself better than you do.
118
00:04:27,359 --> 00:04:28,059
You're right.
119
00:04:28,060 --> 00:04:29,961
What do I know?
120
00:04:29,962 --> 00:04:31,796
I'm just your neighbor's dog
who talks to you
121
00:04:31,797 --> 00:04:33,197
and doubles partner
in Wii tennis.
122
00:04:33,198 --> 00:04:34,965
You're totally fine.
123
00:04:34,966 --> 00:04:36,766
Mm.
124
00:04:36,767 --> 00:04:38,368
Everything looks so good.
125
00:04:38,369 --> 00:04:41,872
I can't decide.
126
00:04:44,209 --> 00:04:45,709
Ooh!
127
00:04:45,710 --> 00:04:47,478
Red velvet.
128
00:04:47,479 --> 00:04:49,414
I think I'm going to be
a little bit naughty today.
129
00:04:49,415 --> 00:04:50,448
(chuckles)
130
00:04:50,449 --> 00:04:52,850
MAN:
Nice dog.
131
00:04:52,851 --> 00:04:55,220
He's got quite a personality.
132
00:04:55,221 --> 00:04:57,523
Yeah, that's Wilfred all right.
133
00:04:57,524 --> 00:04:59,258
(scoffs)
Wilfred?
134
00:04:59,259 --> 00:05:00,592
Is that what he's
calling himself now?
135
00:05:02,395 --> 00:05:04,629
You know, that's real
Italian leather.
136
00:05:04,630 --> 00:05:07,198
He might want to
get a sharper knife.
137
00:05:07,199 --> 00:05:08,265
What...?
138
00:05:08,266 --> 00:05:11,002
Yeah.
139
00:05:11,003 --> 00:05:13,405
I see him, too.
140
00:05:13,406 --> 00:05:15,207
And I hear him.
141
00:05:15,208 --> 00:05:17,409
I hear the things he says.
142
00:05:17,410 --> 00:05:19,578
- Okay, if this is some kind
of twisted joke... - No.
143
00:05:19,579 --> 00:05:21,880
Wilfred ruined my life.
144
00:05:21,881 --> 00:05:23,448
And you know what?
145
00:05:23,449 --> 00:05:26,051
You're next.
146
00:05:31,576 --> 00:05:32,810
I, I don't know why you've
been following me around...
147
00:05:32,811 --> 00:05:35,179
I'm Bruce.
Ryan, is it?
148
00:05:35,180 --> 00:05:37,448
Don't you bullshit me,
Ryan, you see him.
149
00:05:37,449 --> 00:05:39,383
We both know what
I'm talking about.
150
00:05:39,384 --> 00:05:41,285
- Who are you?
- WILFRED: Ryan? Ryan!
151
00:05:41,286 --> 00:05:42,987
Shit, he's coming.
152
00:05:42,988 --> 00:05:46,591
Do not tell Wilfred we talked.
153
00:05:46,592 --> 00:05:49,360
You-you call me when you're
ready to learn the truth.
154
00:05:49,361 --> 00:05:51,062
There you are.
155
00:05:51,063 --> 00:05:52,497
Find anything interesting here?
156
00:05:52,498 --> 00:05:54,332
Oh, no. Not really.
157
00:05:54,333 --> 00:05:56,535
RYAN:
Wilfred.
158
00:05:56,536 --> 00:05:59,371
This... thing we have.
159
00:05:59,372 --> 00:06:02,375
The way we... communicate.
160
00:06:02,376 --> 00:06:07,547
Have you ever had this sort of
relationship with anyone else?
161
00:06:13,520 --> 00:06:15,387
Why do you ask?
162
00:06:15,388 --> 00:06:16,721
Have you?
163
00:06:16,722 --> 00:06:19,224
It happened once before.
164
00:06:19,225 --> 00:06:21,092
I was at a party,
165
00:06:21,093 --> 00:06:25,196
and... this guy looked
right at me and said,
166
00:06:25,197 --> 00:06:27,431
"Hey. What's up, dog?
167
00:06:27,432 --> 00:06:30,935
I see you, and I know
what you're up to."
168
00:06:30,936 --> 00:06:34,439
I said, "Well, I see you, too.
169
00:06:34,440 --> 00:06:36,175
If you've got something
to say, say it."
170
00:06:37,944 --> 00:06:41,547
Turns out he was talking
to the guy right behind me,
171
00:06:41,548 --> 00:06:42,814
who'd been banging his wife.
172
00:06:42,815 --> 00:06:44,549
Wait... Ryan,
173
00:06:44,550 --> 00:06:46,384
please tell me there
hasn't been been a guy
174
00:06:46,385 --> 00:06:48,554
standing behind me
since we met.
175
00:06:48,555 --> 00:06:50,422
(sighs)
176
00:06:50,423 --> 00:06:51,590
(laughs)
177
00:06:51,591 --> 00:06:53,325
So...
178
00:06:53,326 --> 00:06:54,927
nobody else?
179
00:06:54,928 --> 00:06:58,597
You're one of a kind, Ryan.
180
00:07:09,475 --> 00:07:11,876
(upbeat pop intro plays)
181
00:07:11,877 --> 00:07:14,946
(singing in native language)
182
00:07:14,947 --> 00:07:17,682
I had just gotten
promoted to night manager.
183
00:07:17,683 --> 00:07:20,718
So I decided to treat myself
to a sweet-ass studio apartment.
184
00:07:20,719 --> 00:07:22,788
Mini fridge, black
light, you name it.
185
00:07:22,789 --> 00:07:26,225
And one day, I stopped by my
landlady's to drop off the rent,
186
00:07:26,226 --> 00:07:28,093
and this guy answers the door.
187
00:07:28,094 --> 00:07:31,063
Now I can only assume, must
be her mentally unstable son.
188
00:07:31,064 --> 00:07:33,265
It looks like he's playing
dress-up or something.
189
00:07:33,266 --> 00:07:34,666
But what I didn't know was that
190
00:07:34,667 --> 00:07:36,034
other people didn't
see what I saw.
191
00:07:36,035 --> 00:07:37,369
Does this sound familiar?
192
00:07:37,370 --> 00:07:38,637
Yeah. I just never thought
193
00:07:38,638 --> 00:07:40,405
I'd hear this from someone else.
194
00:07:40,406 --> 00:07:41,840
Anyway, we smoke a joint.
195
00:07:41,841 --> 00:07:43,842
Tells me a couple
funny stories.
196
00:07:43,843 --> 00:07:46,478
Next thing I know, I'm hanging
out with him all the time.
197
00:07:46,479 --> 00:07:47,712
I'm his Goddamn best friend.
198
00:07:47,713 --> 00:07:49,514
Let me guess.
199
00:07:49,515 --> 00:07:51,950
He talked you out of
getting a job, didn't he?
200
00:07:51,951 --> 00:07:54,453
Keeps you smoking
weed all the time.
201
00:07:54,454 --> 00:07:55,788
Hell, I bet he even
got you to take a piss
202
00:07:55,789 --> 00:07:57,189
in some poor guy's hat.
203
00:07:57,190 --> 00:07:59,025
Not exactly.
204
00:07:59,026 --> 00:08:01,628
And then he convinced you to
make out with your own father.
205
00:08:01,629 --> 00:08:03,997
- What?! No!
- Yeah.
206
00:08:03,998 --> 00:08:06,133
No. I mean...
me, neither.
207
00:08:06,134 --> 00:08:10,304
Look, I know Wilfred may not
be the best influence,
208
00:08:10,305 --> 00:08:12,006
but he's-he's my friend.
209
00:08:12,007 --> 00:08:13,974
Yeah, I thought so, too.
210
00:08:13,975 --> 00:08:15,608
One night we're at
this strip club.
211
00:08:15,609 --> 00:08:16,943
Wilfred slips me a condom.
212
00:08:16,944 --> 00:08:19,045
Shoves me in the V.I.P. room.
213
00:08:19,046 --> 00:08:21,981
Turns out, he poked a hole
in the tip of that condom.
214
00:08:21,982 --> 00:08:24,783
Next thing I know,
I'm the proud father
215
00:08:24,784 --> 00:08:26,918
of Cinnamon Sizzle's
first-born twins.
216
00:08:26,919 --> 00:08:28,753
- Jesus!
- But the whole time,
217
00:08:28,754 --> 00:08:30,622
through all the
boozing, debauchery,
218
00:08:30,623 --> 00:08:32,257
and making out with...
219
00:08:32,258 --> 00:08:34,125
well, people I won't
normally made out with,
220
00:08:34,126 --> 00:08:38,798
I never doubted that Wilfred
was looking out for me.
221
00:08:38,799 --> 00:08:41,434
I can tell you
don't believe me.
222
00:08:41,435 --> 00:08:43,637
But just ask yourself this.
223
00:08:45,673 --> 00:08:47,374
How well do you really
know Wilfred?
224
00:08:50,312 --> 00:08:52,814
Uh, I'll be back from the
dentist in a couple hours,
225
00:08:52,815 --> 00:08:55,350
so just hang out
on the coach, and--
226
00:08:55,351 --> 00:08:58,553
I don't know-- do whatever it is
you do when I'm not around.
227
00:08:58,554 --> 00:09:00,522
Later, man.
228
00:09:00,523 --> 00:09:03,158
I'm sure I'll be right here
on the coach where you left me.
229
00:09:23,214 --> 00:09:25,416
♪ ♪
230
00:09:49,472 --> 00:09:51,673
(door closes)
231
00:09:57,113 --> 00:09:59,348
♪ ♪
232
00:10:30,249 --> 00:10:31,917
♪ ♪
233
00:10:59,111 --> 00:11:00,679
Why are you following me?
234
00:11:00,680 --> 00:11:02,081
I, uh...
235
00:11:02,082 --> 00:11:03,549
What, you don't trust me?
236
00:11:03,550 --> 00:11:04,617
What's going on?
237
00:11:06,319 --> 00:11:08,287
I don't know what
to think anymore.
238
00:11:10,758 --> 00:11:12,191
Ryan?
239
00:11:13,660 --> 00:11:16,328
Um... yeah?
240
00:11:16,329 --> 00:11:18,631
(singsongy):
It's me...
241
00:11:18,632 --> 00:11:21,100
Angelique...
242
00:11:21,101 --> 00:11:23,035
Oh.
243
00:11:23,036 --> 00:11:24,336
Hi.
244
00:11:24,337 --> 00:11:27,906
Hey, just to warn you, I had
245
00:11:27,907 --> 00:11:29,708
a gin and Sprite...
246
00:11:29,709 --> 00:11:32,744
while I was getting ready.
247
00:11:32,745 --> 00:11:34,046
Okay, two.
248
00:11:34,047 --> 00:11:35,714
(laughing)
249
00:11:35,715 --> 00:11:38,083
(continues laughing)
250
00:11:38,084 --> 00:11:39,550
Oh, where's your fedora?
251
00:11:39,551 --> 00:11:41,953
You said in your message
you were gonna wear it.
252
00:11:41,954 --> 00:11:43,387
My message
253
00:11:43,388 --> 00:11:44,722
Oh, my God.
254
00:11:44,723 --> 00:11:48,125
Some of the things
that you wrote
255
00:11:48,126 --> 00:11:50,227
were so gross...
256
00:11:50,228 --> 00:11:52,929
I almost didn't come here
on this date.
257
00:11:52,930 --> 00:11:55,098
But then I was, like...
258
00:11:55,099 --> 00:11:57,634
gross is kind of hot, right?
259
00:11:57,635 --> 00:12:00,637
And all of that stuff
260
00:12:00,638 --> 00:12:02,606
about the post office...
261
00:12:02,607 --> 00:12:05,075
I don't really know...
262
00:12:05,076 --> 00:12:07,911
what "snout rape" means...
263
00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:12,382
...but I hate my mailman, too.
264
00:12:12,383 --> 00:12:14,151
(phone ringing)
265
00:12:14,152 --> 00:12:16,954
- WILFRED (over phone): 23 inches, Ryan.
- What?
266
00:12:16,955 --> 00:12:19,056
I know, right?
267
00:12:19,057 --> 00:12:20,824
Why the hell am I on
a date with Angelique
268
00:12:20,825 --> 00:12:22,393
and not the girl I picked?
269
00:12:22,394 --> 00:12:24,795
Angelique is an
alcoholic blow-job machine.
270
00:12:24,796 --> 00:12:25,763
And you're welcome.
271
00:12:30,034 --> 00:12:32,602
L-listen, I think I'm
just gonna head home
272
00:12:32,603 --> 00:12:34,271
and call it a night.
273
00:12:34,272 --> 00:12:37,107
Why don't I just pay
for my drink and...
274
00:12:38,275 --> 00:12:40,677
Oh, I get it.
275
00:12:40,678 --> 00:12:43,146
Let's head home?
276
00:12:43,147 --> 00:12:45,182
Call it a night?
277
00:12:45,183 --> 00:12:46,616
I'm down with that.
278
00:12:48,052 --> 00:12:49,786
- Will you excuse me?
- Yeah.
279
00:12:58,829 --> 00:13:00,429
Shitty date, huh?
280
00:13:00,430 --> 00:13:03,600
What are you doing here?
281
00:13:03,601 --> 00:13:05,935
Do you believe me now, Ryan?
282
00:13:05,936 --> 00:13:10,306
I don't know who
to believe anymore.
283
00:13:11,674 --> 00:13:13,809
Then test that condom.
284
00:13:20,816 --> 00:13:23,484
It's not too late
for you, Ryan.
285
00:13:23,485 --> 00:13:26,587
Get rid of Wilfred.
286
00:13:26,588 --> 00:13:28,689
Get your life back.
287
00:13:28,690 --> 00:13:30,991
Get rid of him?
288
00:13:30,992 --> 00:13:33,127
You mean kill him.
289
00:13:33,128 --> 00:13:34,796
What's wrong with you?
290
00:13:34,797 --> 00:13:36,832
Oh, you don't kill him!
291
00:13:36,833 --> 00:13:39,234
You take him out in the middle
of nowhere and ditch him!
292
00:13:39,235 --> 00:13:42,905
- But he's not even my dog. I...
- Shh!
293
00:13:42,906 --> 00:13:44,874
He's not your dog...
294
00:13:44,875 --> 00:13:47,110
but he's your problem.
295
00:13:47,111 --> 00:13:49,645
All right.
296
00:13:49,646 --> 00:13:52,014
I'll do it.
297
00:13:52,015 --> 00:13:53,449
Hey.
298
00:13:53,450 --> 00:13:55,584
Uh, give me just a second.
299
00:13:57,387 --> 00:13:59,354
(flushes toilet)
300
00:13:59,355 --> 00:14:00,989
Did you just...
301
00:14:00,990 --> 00:14:03,391
Shh...!
302
00:14:03,392 --> 00:14:06,661
Let me just wash my hands.
303
00:14:06,662 --> 00:14:08,362
(turns on faucet)
304
00:14:12,666 --> 00:14:14,635
Wait, so, where we're
going there's an acre,
305
00:14:14,636 --> 00:14:17,238
a full acre of just pot plants,
all for the taking?
306
00:14:17,239 --> 00:14:18,839
And there's no security?
307
00:14:18,840 --> 00:14:20,775
That's what the guy
at the dispensary said.
308
00:14:20,776 --> 00:14:22,544
So, would I be able to, like,
309
00:14:22,545 --> 00:14:24,712
stuff this whole
knapsack full of weed?
310
00:14:24,713 --> 00:14:26,347
(engine starts)
Sure.
311
00:14:28,017 --> 00:14:29,884
Never smelled that before.
312
00:14:29,885 --> 00:14:31,085
Never smelled that before.
313
00:14:32,388 --> 00:14:34,589
Never smelled...
that before.
314
00:14:34,590 --> 00:14:36,657
- Oh... shoot!
- Never smelled that before.
315
00:14:36,658 --> 00:14:38,759
I-I just realized,
I left the granola bars
316
00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:40,761
back in the car.
(exhales)
317
00:14:40,762 --> 00:14:43,497
- I'm sorry, I'll just go get them.
- I'll come with you.
318
00:14:43,498 --> 00:14:45,165
No, th-that's okay.
319
00:14:45,166 --> 00:14:47,401
Uh, just go ahead;
I'll catch up.
320
00:14:47,402 --> 00:14:48,769
You stay here--
I'll go back to the car.
321
00:14:48,770 --> 00:14:50,337
No, no, no, no. No, no.
322
00:14:50,338 --> 00:14:52,774
Just... stay, Wilfred.
323
00:14:52,775 --> 00:14:54,175
Stay.
324
00:14:54,176 --> 00:14:55,944
Is something going on, mate?
325
00:14:55,945 --> 00:14:59,047
You're acting kind of...
326
00:14:59,048 --> 00:15:00,882
Wait, are you...
327
00:15:00,883 --> 00:15:03,451
leaving me here?
328
00:15:03,452 --> 00:15:05,053
(twig snaps)
329
00:15:05,054 --> 00:15:08,189
- What was that?
- What was what?
330
00:15:09,658 --> 00:15:12,026
Bruce.
What are you doing here?
331
00:15:12,027 --> 00:15:13,861
Who are you talking to, mate?
332
00:15:13,862 --> 00:15:15,730
Bruce. You don't see him?
333
00:15:15,731 --> 00:15:17,165
See who?
334
00:15:17,166 --> 00:15:18,866
I knew he'd do this.
335
00:15:18,867 --> 00:15:21,569
He sees me--
he's just being a dick.
336
00:15:21,570 --> 00:15:23,904
Ryan, there's just you and me
here, you know that, right?
337
00:15:23,905 --> 00:15:25,573
You're really starting
to worry me now.
338
00:15:25,574 --> 00:15:27,208
Look, let's just go
back to the car...
339
00:15:27,209 --> 00:15:29,410
(sneezes)
Oh, dude,
340
00:15:29,411 --> 00:15:31,680
you are bloody kidding me!
341
00:15:31,681 --> 00:15:32,781
See?
342
00:15:32,782 --> 00:15:34,016
He knows I'm here.
343
00:15:35,585 --> 00:15:37,719
(panting)
344
00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:39,488
Hello, Bruce.
345
00:15:39,489 --> 00:15:42,190
I should've known you'd
have a hand in this.
346
00:15:42,191 --> 00:15:44,326
And you, Ryan--
347
00:15:44,327 --> 00:15:46,529
conspiring with this lunatic
behind my back.
348
00:15:46,530 --> 00:15:48,665
Okay, it's true. I met Bruce
349
00:15:48,666 --> 00:15:51,033
- a couple days ago, and...
- He told you
350
00:15:51,034 --> 00:15:54,304
- some crazy story about me
ruining his life? - Ryan, don't listen
351
00:15:54,305 --> 00:15:56,506
to him-- he's just trying
to get inside your head.
352
00:15:56,507 --> 00:15:57,908
Who you gonna believe, Ryan?
353
00:15:57,909 --> 00:15:58,909
WILFRED:
Whoa, whoa.
354
00:15:58,910 --> 00:16:00,110
What?
355
00:16:00,111 --> 00:16:01,978
We can't leave him here, Ryan.
356
00:16:01,979 --> 00:16:03,746
Now, I don't know what you are.
357
00:16:03,747 --> 00:16:06,082
I don't know if you're
a devil, an alien,
358
00:16:06,083 --> 00:16:07,817
or something crazier than that,
359
00:16:07,818 --> 00:16:09,619
but someone's got to stop you.
360
00:16:09,620 --> 00:16:11,287
You're not well, mate.
361
00:16:11,288 --> 00:16:12,788
Now, listen to me...
362
00:16:12,789 --> 00:16:14,123
I'm through listening to you!
363
00:16:14,124 --> 00:16:15,824
Violence is never the answer.
364
00:16:15,825 --> 00:16:18,693
As the great Dr. Martin
Luther King Jr. once said...
365
00:16:18,694 --> 00:16:19,594
(grunts)
366
00:16:22,764 --> 00:16:25,300
- Ryan! Give me the gun!
- Don't do it, Ryan!
367
00:16:25,301 --> 00:16:26,434
He's gonna ruin your life
like he ruined mine!
368
00:16:26,435 --> 00:16:27,903
- Give me that gun!
- Bullshit!
369
00:16:27,904 --> 00:16:30,006
Did you tell Ryan about
your cocaine addiction?
370
00:16:30,007 --> 00:16:31,908
Or your weakness
for prostitutes?
371
00:16:31,909 --> 00:16:33,577
You convinced me to make out
with my own father.
372
00:16:33,578 --> 00:16:35,045
Everyone at the party loved it!
373
00:16:35,046 --> 00:16:36,213
They thought it was edgy!
374
00:16:36,214 --> 00:16:37,915
(Bruce yells)
375
00:16:37,916 --> 00:16:39,417
(grunting, panting)
376
00:16:40,886 --> 00:16:42,553
Stop!
377
00:16:42,554 --> 00:16:43,821
(gunshot)
378
00:16:43,822 --> 00:16:45,255
Not up there, you idiot!
379
00:16:45,256 --> 00:16:47,258
He's down here!
380
00:16:47,259 --> 00:16:48,993
I don't want to do this.
381
00:16:48,994 --> 00:16:51,162
WILFRED (distorted):
Kill him, Ryan! Kill him...!
382
00:16:51,163 --> 00:16:52,330
(gunshot)
383
00:16:53,765 --> 00:16:54,899
(panting)
384
00:16:54,900 --> 00:16:57,234
Well done, Ryan.
385
00:16:57,235 --> 00:16:58,835
Well done.
386
00:16:58,836 --> 00:17:01,338
Look what you made me do?
387
00:17:01,339 --> 00:17:03,273
Oh, no, this was your choice.
388
00:17:03,274 --> 00:17:05,074
What are you talking about?
389
00:17:05,075 --> 00:17:06,643
I just killed a man!
390
00:17:06,644 --> 00:17:07,744
Or did you?
391
00:17:07,745 --> 00:17:09,079
(gunshot)
(gasps, pants)
392
00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:11,282
Oh! (laughs)
393
00:17:11,283 --> 00:17:12,751
Blanks?
394
00:17:12,752 --> 00:17:14,853
What the hell is going on?
395
00:17:14,854 --> 00:17:15,921
Isn't it obvious?
396
00:17:15,922 --> 00:17:17,256
No, it's not obvious!
397
00:17:17,257 --> 00:17:19,091
Nothing is ever
obvious with you!
398
00:17:19,092 --> 00:17:19,926
May I?
399
00:17:20,995 --> 00:17:22,629
Hi, Ryan.
400
00:17:23,330 --> 00:17:24,063
Hi, Bruce.
401
00:17:24,064 --> 00:17:25,198
Here's the thing, pal.
402
00:17:25,199 --> 00:17:28,435
This shit is complicated.
403
00:17:31,272 --> 00:17:32,339
Good game, Bruce.
404
00:17:34,074 --> 00:17:35,842
I'll get you next time.
405
00:17:35,843 --> 00:17:37,710
Yeah, we'll see about that.
406
00:17:37,711 --> 00:17:40,246
See you around, kid.
407
00:17:40,247 --> 00:17:42,482
"Good game"?
408
00:17:42,483 --> 00:17:45,318
Well, it was more of
a contest, really.
409
00:17:45,319 --> 00:17:46,787
And... I won.
410
00:17:46,788 --> 00:17:49,791
But the real winner... is you.
411
00:17:49,792 --> 00:17:51,959
- And me, of course.
- That doesn't
412
00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:54,695
- really clear things up for me, Wilfred.
- Look, mate, remember
413
00:17:54,696 --> 00:17:57,932
the other day when I told you that
your problems hadn't simply vanished?
414
00:17:57,933 --> 00:18:01,001
I warned you something like this
would happen, but you doubted me.
415
00:18:01,002 --> 00:18:03,604
So you made something
like this happen?
416
00:18:03,605 --> 00:18:06,240
The fact is, you
had your doubts,
417
00:18:06,241 --> 00:18:08,342
so I put you to the test,
418
00:18:08,343 --> 00:18:10,111
and when the chips were down,
419
00:18:10,112 --> 00:18:12,480
you chose faith over doubt.
420
00:18:12,481 --> 00:18:14,415
You chose me.
421
00:18:14,416 --> 00:18:17,284
So... who-who
the hell was that guy?
422
00:18:17,285 --> 00:18:18,519
What guy?
423
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:20,654
Bruce! The guy
who was just here!
424
00:18:20,655 --> 00:18:22,623
I don't know who you're
talking about, mate.
425
00:18:22,624 --> 00:18:24,691
B... but he was...
426
00:18:24,692 --> 00:18:26,160
but you...
427
00:18:26,161 --> 00:18:27,661
Oh, oh, Bruce?
428
00:18:27,662 --> 00:18:29,596
The guy who was just
here, Bruce Bruce--
429
00:18:29,597 --> 00:18:31,799
oh, yeah, he's gone-- for now.
430
00:18:31,800 --> 00:18:34,301
But listen, if you
see him around again,
431
00:18:34,302 --> 00:18:37,638
you need to let me know, okay?
432
00:18:37,639 --> 00:18:39,840
♪ ♪
433
00:18:43,178 --> 00:18:46,648
I guess you were right.
434
00:18:46,649 --> 00:18:50,752
I still have a long road
ahead of me.
435
00:18:50,753 --> 00:18:54,522
And all those positive changes
I thought I made...
436
00:18:54,523 --> 00:18:56,725
were just fluffy pink clouds.
437
00:18:56,726 --> 00:18:58,060
Yeah.
438
00:18:58,061 --> 00:19:01,364
But those clouds have
a silver lining--
439
00:19:01,365 --> 00:19:02,699
me.
440
00:19:04,635 --> 00:19:07,537
You don't have to
go it alone, Ryan.
441
00:19:07,538 --> 00:19:10,507
Thanks.
442
00:19:10,508 --> 00:19:12,242
(match strikes)
You know...
443
00:19:12,243 --> 00:19:14,777
I really think
I'm gonna be all right.
444
00:19:14,778 --> 00:19:17,247
'Course you are.
445
00:19:22,253 --> 00:19:24,822
I ain't going anywhere.
446
00:19:40,623 --> 00:19:43,225
All right, all right.
Fair enough.
447
00:19:43,226 --> 00:19:45,560
I'll tell you how I met Bruce.
448
00:19:45,561 --> 00:19:47,729
It was about five years ago.
449
00:19:47,730 --> 00:19:50,131
I was hanging around this
college campus.
450
00:19:50,132 --> 00:19:52,400
Bruce was a professor there.
451
00:19:52,401 --> 00:19:55,036
And one day, he wrote this
452
00:19:55,037 --> 00:19:57,906
super-complicated
math equation on the board
453
00:19:57,907 --> 00:20:01,109
that no one could solve,
except me-- the janitor.
454
00:20:01,110 --> 00:20:04,512
Matt Damon?
Good Will Hunting?
455
00:20:06,148 --> 00:20:08,282
Okay.
456
00:20:08,283 --> 00:20:11,351
It's only fair you know
the truth about Bruce.
457
00:20:11,352 --> 00:20:13,220
(sighs)
458
00:20:13,221 --> 00:20:16,656
But I haven't told
this to anyone.
459
00:20:16,657 --> 00:20:19,893
I was a young pup at the time.
460
00:20:19,894 --> 00:20:23,996
Good-looking, but a little
messed-up in the head.
461
00:20:23,997 --> 00:20:26,298
I met Bruce while I was
infiltrating
462
00:20:26,299 --> 00:20:29,068
the Boston Police Department
for this Irish mobster...
463
00:20:29,069 --> 00:20:31,237
The Departed?
464
00:20:37,677 --> 00:20:40,112
You want to know
how I met Bruce?
465
00:20:40,113 --> 00:20:42,749
The truth is...
466
00:20:42,750 --> 00:20:45,952
I don't remember.
467
00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:48,088
All right, well, at least
that's an honest answer.
468
00:20:48,089 --> 00:20:50,424
There's a lot of
things I don't remember:
469
00:20:50,425 --> 00:20:54,862
where I'm from, how I got here.
470
00:20:54,863 --> 00:20:58,199
There's only one
thing I do know.
471
00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:01,470
My name is Jason Bourne.
472
00:21:01,471 --> 00:21:05,841
(blowing into bottle)
473
00:21:05,842 --> 00:21:11,500
Transcript by Addic7ed.com
474
00:21:11,550 --> 00:21:16,100
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