Original subtitles

- Hello. - Hi.

Aren't you going to be late for school?

Today's a half day.

Since when?

Since I woke up at 10:00.

Okay, well, uh, why are you eating here?

I thought we agreed that from the hours

of 8:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. weekdays,

- this was my office space. - But you weren't here.

Okay, well, that doesn't really matter.

At my old job, when I left my office,

it stayed my office.

Oh, actually, sometimes the girls and I

did yoga in there.

Can you just eat at the counter?

I want to sit at a table

like a mature adult and eat my fruity pebbles.

Okay, fine.

You eat, I'll work.

Fine.

- Um, I -- - What?

Your fruity pebbles are on my folder.

What?

Are you done with the milk?

- I don't know. - How can you not know?

Because I've only had two bites.

I don't know if I have

the proper milk-to-cereal ratio yet.

Okay, can you make an executive decision about that?

Because it's next to my computer.

You could spill. It's like a ticking time bomb.

Oh, my God.

Thank you for my recommended daily allowance of annoying!

You know what? I am going to have to ask you

not to talk to me like that in my office.

Okay. You know what? Okay.

I have tried to be supportive

of this whole working out of the house thing,

but you are driving me crazy!

I can't use the computer because you're always on it,

I can't use the phone because you're always

waiting for an "important call,"

And now I can't even enjoy

a leisurely brunch before math!

Do you think this is easy for me,

a grown woman pretending this is her office?

Okay, I'm not getting into this again.

I'll just sit at the stupid coffee table.

Thank you.

Val...

What?

Hol?

What?

That's Lauren's office.

Ahh!

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Okay. Okay, this isn't bad.

This office could work. What do you guys think?

Oh, it's nice. It's got a toilet.

Where?

We're in it.

You know, for somebody that wants me

out of the apartment so bad, you're being awfully picky.

Well, this place is gross!

I mean, I'm gonna have to come visit you here,

and what if I want to bring friends over? Oh, my God!

We have seen 11 different offices.

It's a little dingy. So what?

It stinks like feet in here!

Come on, you guys, would you please

just try to have a positive attitude?

Okay.

It stinks like feet in here. Yay!

It's still a step up, okay?

Lauren, can you get the landlord?

Have you seen him? I think anyone can get him.

Val, you're not seriously thinking

about taking this place, are you?

Celia's dad just got an office

in the Chrysler building.

It's so nice. It's got a great view,

a nice reception area --

Yeah. Celia's dad is a successful, rich attorney.

Excuse me.

Uh, is Celia's dad still with Celia's mom?

Look, Val, you're in the P.R. business.

Don't you know people?

Doesn't anybody owe you any favors?

What about pulling some strings?

You are so cute.

I love it that you still believe in strings.

You know what, Val? I hate when you do that.

I hate it when you treat me like I'm five.

Well, one of these days

you're gonna have to figure out that what we want

is not necessarily what we can have.

Oh, my God!

I'm totally getting that underarm flap.

A little paint, a case of Lysol,

it'll be great.

Quitter.

I'm sorry. What?

Oh, she said "quitter."

Yeah, you look at a few places, and then you give up.

That's not true, Holly. I'm just being realistic.

This is what we can afford.

Oh, no, no, no. You're being a quitter.

See, that's difference between me and you.

I think that anything is possible,

and you are going to end up in a rat hole like this

because you don't think outside the box.

Okay, well, why don't you saddle up that unicorn

and fly off to the magical land of strings

and pull, pull, pull?

You find that office.

Maybe I will.

Good.

Yeah, and I guarantee you that it won't smell of feet.

Okay, you go get 'em... Holly.

So, was the office really that bad?

I mean, there had to be something good about it.

Mm, yeah, it had a big window.

I guess if it got too hot, you could open it up,

step out on the ledge, jump off, and kill yourself.

And you think you can find a better place?

I know I can.

I mean, I don't know what age people start

giving up on their dreams,

but I'm not gonna let that happen to Val.

Damn, that's nice, Holly.

Yeah. Plus, when I find the place,

I can totally rub her face in it.

- Hey, guys. - Hey.

Where have you been?

Making 200 bucks from a rich guy.

I told ya.

Bite me. I'm taking care of the guy's plants.

What guy?

Jay Miller. He owns the loft above us.

You live in the same building as Jay Miller?

Man, y'all are rich, huh?

Well...yeah.

Who's Jay Miller?

He's some stockbroker guy

who got put in jail for insider trading.

Hey, so what's his place like? Is it all rich?

He's like a gazillionaire. What do you think?

I don't know why you always use that hurtful tone with me.

I think you're a really nice person.

What do you want?

I want to see the rich guy's apartment.

That's all you got?

I mean, why couldn't you tell me I'm pretty and charming?

I don't want to see it that bad.

I do.

No, I don't know. Jay's kind of weird about his place.

Come on, pretty hair, pretty skin, pretty eyes.

Reow!

Okay. Okay.

But, you know, once we're in Jay's place,

you can't sit on anything, you can't touch anything,

and you can't play with anything.

Why are you looking at me?

Nice shot, dude.

Yeah, Gary moves real good in Armani.

Oh, I love this chair!

My butt and this chair have formed a magical union.

You guys, I told you not to touch anything.

I promised Jay.

Uh-oh.

You broke your promise to the white-collar criminal.

He might send you a tersely worded letter.

So, how long is this guy going to be in the pokey?

Five years.

Man, would you guys check this office out?

I mean, his desk is bigger than my house.

Office?

Oh, my God, five years. This is it, Gary.

Oh, my God, I am so outside the box right now.

You see what happens when you dream?

The long journey is over.

This is what I've been looking for all day!

Wait a second.

You think some big-time Wall Street businessman

is just gonna let you move in here?

Yeah, Holly, as much as I'd like

to have you live in my building,

it's not going to happen.

This guy turns down offers to sublet every day.

He doesn't need the money.

Then we won't give him any!

Oh, my God, the dream keeps getting better and better!

I'm calling Val.

Hey, Val?

Hey. I can't talk right now.

I'm on my way over to sign a lease.

I found a place. It's practically odor-free.

Wait. No, no, no. Don't sign anything.

I found the most incredible place.

Too late. I'm on my way over to meet

the landlord right now and give him a check.

No, Val, come here first.

I guarantee you it's a billion times better.

There are five other people who want this place.

I got to go.

No, Val, meet me at the Liberty Diner.

It's practically across the street.

I promise you you're going to love it.

Well, how big is it? How much is it?

How long is the lease?

Huh? What?

Oh, losing you. Come now. [ imitates static ]

Wow, this is unbelievable.

Oh, my God, I know. This is so exciting.

No, Jay and I got the same size dogs.

[ Holly ]: Not yet. Keep them closed. Keep them closed.

Are they closed? Okay. Wait. Okay, stop. Step.

Okay. Not yet.

Okay...now, open!

Oh, my God!

I know!

Office, home.

Nice office, huge home!

And we'll still only be paying one rent,

but we won't be tripping all over each other.

And, come on, how impressed will her clients be

when you bring them here?

And...I could learn how to play the piano.

And there's an espresso machine.

I could offer our clients fancy coffee...

and biscotti.

Biscotti is so classy.

The place I get waxed, they have biscotti.

Lauren's on board,

so what do you think?

What are you thinking?

Seriously, we can't afford this.

How do you know? You don't even know how much it is!

Oh, okay. How much is it?

Here's the kicker -- he doesn't need the money!

Well, I love it!

It's so big.

It makes me feel all dainty and fragile.

Holly, this place would go

for like $10,000, $12,000 a month.

Oh, actually ours goes for 15.

Okay, Lauren, do me a favor.

Call the landlord right now and tell him

we will be there in 15 minutes

to sign the lease.

I can't believe you dragged me down here for this.

Wait, Val, if I could just cut in for a second.

Um, now, the owner, he's a businessman,

all right?

Now, maybe he will be willing to negotiate.

Ha ha ha ha!

Holly, I'm sorry. I just can't.

I just -- y'all go ahead. I just can't.

- Look, Val, can we at least just meet the guy? - No!

Why? Even if there's the teensiest, weensiest

bit of hope that we could get this place,

why won't you at least try?

Will you stop? Lauren, is he there yet?

No, I'm still on hold.

Ooh, cheese!

Val, it will only take a half-hour.

It'll take you a half-hour just to clear security.

Security? What are you talking about, security?

- Where is he? - He's in prison!

How fantastic is that?

He's in prison?

Yes! I mean, this place is just sitting here empty

waiting for us to move in.

You want to talk to a guy in prison?

You know, I am actually concerned about you right now.

Something is not right in here.

You said for me to go find it. I found it.

You found nothing.

Holly, this isn't real. We will never have this.

Lauren, let's go.

- We lost it. - What?

Some guy came in with cash.

He signed the lease five minutes ago.

So I guess this one's a go!

Oh...

Lauren, put down the cheese. Let's go.

Why are people always saying that to me?

Val, please.

You better hope I can still get that stinky feet place.

Sorry.

All right, let's just go.

This place is depressing me now.

Oh, just give me a couple minutes.

I need to run upstairs and water the plants

around the pool.

Pool?

Take a couple packs for yourself.

Get yourself something nice.

That's him over there.

Hey, Jay.

Hi, Tina.

So, what's up? Who's this?

This is my friend Holly.

Holly here has something she wanted to ask you.

Oh.

Ooh, Fresca.

Over there.

Um...hello.

Hi.

Okay, Mr. Miller, um...

have you ever wanted something so much

that you would do just about anything to get it?

Yeah, I think pretty much everyone in here

has experienced that.

What is it you want?

Okay, you know what?

I'm just gonna lay it out there.

My sister and I want to live in your loft.

No.

Can I finish? Thanks.

Uh, my sister and I want to live in your loft

so much!

Oh...no.

Okay, look, my sister is one of the most responsible --

No!

[ fake sobbing ]

Are you trying to cry?

I'm just -- I'm just really sad, you know?

I'm sad for the loft.

I mean, it's alone, no one's there,

and, you know, it's lonely.

And my sister stopped believing in dreams and stuff.

Yeah, there aren't any tears.

I was born with no tear holes.

Sorry, not buying it.

Huh?

Yeah, my daughter used to pull

the same fake crying bit on me all the time.

Daughter? I didn't know you had a daughter.

She's not going to take my job, is she?

No, she won't even speak to me.

I haven't heard a word from her

since she refused to drive me to Mexico

in the trunk of her car.

Oh, I got to go. It's time for book club,

and I want to get one of the comfy chairs.

Hey, it's nice to meet you, Holly.

Tina, come see me again, okay?

Jay, please, please.

Oh!

[ fake sobbing ]

Anything?

No, no.

I can't believe someone took

the smelly feet place.

Mm, well, try to look on the bright side.

Maybe tomorrow we'll find a place

that smells like armpits.

Hey, do you think I was too rough on Holly before

at the loft?

Are you asking me as a friend, or as an employee?

What's the difference?

Well, as a friend, I would say

shattering all her hopes and dreams

was devastating.

As an employee, I'd say I admire you,

and I'm grateful to work for one so angelic.

Come on, you saw that loft.

I mean, it's impossible.

You can hope.

I mean, look, the chances of Colin Farrell

jamming his tongue in my ear are pretty slim,

but it's gotten me through many a lonely night.

All I'm saying is, take away hope,

and what have you got?

Me.

I don't want to turn Holly into somebody

who doesn't have dreams. I mean --

Whoa, whoa. Okay, you know what?

You're getting a little too thinky and deep,

and that is just so not fun for me.

Hey!

Hey.

Aw, look at that --

another sad face.

I am so out of here.

So, did you get the office?

No.

Sorry.

I'm sorry, too --

I mean, about this afternoon.

You were so excited about that loft, and I just --

No, you were right.

I mean, it was stupid, anyway.

No. What do you mean, I was right?

The whole thing -- it was stupid.

No, don't say that, okay? What happened?

I went to the prison.

You went to the prison?

I mean...you went to the prison all by yourself?

How brave.

Tina went with me, and I talked to the guy,

and he practically laughed in my face.

You know, that's it. It's over.

No, Holly, you cannot give up! Listen to me.

If people gave up every time they ran into a little problem,

we wouldn't have airplanes

or spaceships or TVs or the peanut butter cup.

What?

I don't know. Look, the point is,

I just don't think that you have explored

every possibility.

I thought you said there was something

seriously wrong in here.

Oh. Why? Why do you hold on to every word I say?

Listen, sit down, okay?

Now, just tell me, what did the guy say?

Well, I said I wanted to live in his loft,

and he said no like a million times.

- Did you beg? - Big time!

Whine?

Did you use that whole fake cry thing?

He saw right through it.

I guess his daughter used to do it all the time.

He has a daughter?

Yeah.

What did he say about her?

Nothing. They haven't spoken since he got arrested.

Oh, that is so sad,

a father and a daughter not talking.

You know, I bet it would mean the world to him

if they were to talk.

You know, I'll bet it would mean the world to him.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

A father, daughter not talking.

You, me reuniting.

Father grateful, us getting loft?

Uh-huh.

Hope is alive!

Hey!

- You're back. - What?

Oh, nothing. Come on, let's just get to work.

Wait a second. Is it okay that we're getting

involved in his relationship like that?

Yeah. If we are bringing a father and daughter

back together, then we're really doing something nice.

And if by doing something nice,

something good happens to us...

Then God bless America!

Hi.

Hi. How's it going?

Oh, fine. You know.

Made a broom today. That was fun.

Cool.

I hope you're not here about the loft again.

Oh, no, no. I'm actually here

because I want to do something nice for you.

Oh, what's that?

What would you say if I told you

that your daughter was standing outside with my sister?

Karen's out there?

- Yeah. - How did you do that?

She hasn't spoken a word to me in eight months.

She believed my fake cry.

- Ready? - Yeah.

- Hi. - Hi.

Here.

You look great. Thanks for coming.

Yeah, well, I didn't have much choice.

That blonde girl was really intense.

Hey.

Did you see his face light up when he saw her?

How good are we?

Oh...I know.

Look, he touched her hand.

They are so back together.

I'm so in love with us right now.

You make me puke!

Oh, God, they're fighting. What did we do?

You have no idea what you've put me through!

Oh, God, this isn't good.

Don't call me, don't write,

and don't send weird girls over to my apartment

begging me to come see you.

Can I still send you money?

Yes!

Oh, my God, what happened?

Nothing. I told her she looked pretty.

And I asked her to take the box from under my bed

and ship it to the Cayman Islands.

She looked beautiful, didn't she?

She did.

Oh, hi. I'm Val. I'm Holly's sister.

I'm so sorry. I feel terrible about...

Why are you sorry?

I got to see my daughter again.

- But you guys had a big fight. - I know.

That's the first time she's talked to me in eight months.

I owe you girls big time.

How big?

No. Holly.

You don't owe us anything, Jay. Thanks.

Really, well, I thought you were interested in a loft.

Oh, my God, it's happening!

Our dream has come true!

Oh, my God, we will take such good care of the loft!

Oh, no, no, my loft is out of the question.

What are you doing to me?

But if you're interested, I started to renovate

another loft in that building.

Maybe we can work something out.

Jay, it's very sweet of you, but, really --

Let's hear what the man has to say.

So, uh, this loft -- is it like yours?

It could use a little clean-up.

Hey, I can make you a broom.

[ Val shrieking ]

This place is incredible!

Can you believe we get all this space

for what we were paying in that little apartment?

Can you believe we have to paint all this space?

Oh, look at you all happy.

I am happy. I thought you were insane,

but you did it.

You actually found us a great place.

Then I get the master bedroom.

Okay. Okay, we'll vote.

I vote I get it.

You know what?

You put this whole thing together.

I vote you get it, too.

Are you serious, Val?

Yay, thank you.

You know what?

I vote you get it.

I changed my vote. I vote I get it, too.

Come on, let's go see my new giant room!

[ shrieking ]

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