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1
00:00:08,667 --> 00:00:10,468
No cable.
2
00:00:12,837 --> 00:00:14,204
I forgot.
3
00:00:14,272 --> 00:00:16,540
We're saving money.
4
00:00:18,676 --> 00:00:20,777
Is that a
new magazine?
5
00:00:22,045 --> 00:00:24,279
Yeah.
6
00:00:24,347 --> 00:00:26,214
How much
did it cost?
7
00:00:28,317 --> 00:00:29,626
I have no idea.
8
00:00:29,694 --> 00:00:31,103
Really? You
have no idea?
9
00:00:31,171 --> 00:00:32,235
Well, it says...
10
00:00:32,303 --> 00:00:35,095
Says 4.95 right
on the cover there.
11
00:00:35,162 --> 00:00:37,189
That must be a clue.
12
00:00:38,875 --> 00:00:39,755
What's your point?
13
00:00:39,823 --> 00:00:40,678
Well, the
point is, honey,
14
00:00:40,746 --> 00:00:43,408
I can tell you what
is in there for free.
15
00:00:43,575 --> 00:00:44,527
You ready?
16
00:00:44,794 --> 00:00:46,829
Crap.
17
00:00:46,897 --> 00:00:48,314
The recipe for crap.
18
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:49,947
Who's cheating on crap.
19
00:00:50,014 --> 00:00:52,211
Who's adopting crap.
20
00:00:52,279 --> 00:00:54,508
It's all crap.
21
00:00:55,870 --> 00:00:57,549
Ok, point taken.
22
00:00:57,616 --> 00:01:00,251
I will give them up.
23
00:01:00,319 --> 00:01:01,873
Thank you.
24
00:01:08,071 --> 00:01:11,099
How much did
that book cost, Eddie?
25
00:01:12,166 --> 00:01:13,960
This is a history book, all right?
26
00:01:14,027 --> 00:01:15,603
It's a book
for work.
27
00:01:15,670 --> 00:01:19,037
Really? How come there's
a vampire on the cover?
28
00:01:20,546 --> 00:01:22,862
Ok, all right,
no more books.
29
00:01:22,930 --> 00:01:24,177
Ok.
30
00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:31,637
You know,
we're this close
31
00:01:31,705 --> 00:01:34,685
To watchin'
white-trash tv.
32
00:01:34,752 --> 00:01:37,805
What's white-trash tv?
33
00:01:37,873 --> 00:01:41,531
It's where a bunch of people sit
around and watch a dog lick itself.
34
00:01:47,803 --> 00:01:50,152
You know, since we've
already, you know,
35
00:01:50,220 --> 00:01:51,725
Invested in these
particular items,
36
00:01:51,793 --> 00:01:54,676
maybe we should just
go ahead and read them.
37
00:01:54,743 --> 00:01:56,587
I think that
would be wise.
38
00:01:56,654 --> 00:01:58,364
Ok. Be wasteful not to.
39
00:01:58,432 --> 00:01:59,703
Yes, it would be.
40
00:01:59,771 --> 00:02:01,414
Right?
41
00:02:03,625 --> 00:02:05,568
Or we could have sex.
42
00:02:06,036 --> 00:02:09,122
You know, it's kind
of expensive, Joy.
43
00:02:10,795 --> 00:02:12,070
How so?
44
00:02:12,138 --> 00:02:14,113
Well, you know
how we're...
45
00:02:14,181 --> 00:02:16,623
Every time I'm finished,
I get real hungry,
46
00:02:16,691 --> 00:02:19,404
You know, and then
I gotta go downstairs,
47
00:02:19,471 --> 00:02:22,451
I gotta flip on the lights,
I gotta open the fridge,
48
00:02:22,519 --> 00:02:26,536
And factor in the cost of
the pie that I'm gonna eat.
49
00:02:26,604 --> 00:02:30,787
And then the water it's gonna
take to wash the dishes and myself.
50
00:02:30,855 --> 00:02:33,433
It's deceptively
pricey, Joy.
51
00:02:35,309 --> 00:02:36,613
All right.
52
00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:39,658
I was just takin'
one for the team.
53
00:02:44,313 --> 00:02:45,716
How you doin', babe?
54
00:02:45,784 --> 00:02:46,987
How am I doing?
55
00:02:47,055 --> 00:02:48,461
It's a good question.
56
00:02:48,529 --> 00:02:50,235
Existentially speaking,
57
00:02:50,303 --> 00:02:53,314
I'm not sure I exist.
58
00:02:53,381 --> 00:02:54,951
What?
59
00:02:55,019 --> 00:02:56,926
What if... what if
we're all just part
60
00:02:56,993 --> 00:02:58,666
Of somebody else's
dream, you know?
61
00:02:58,734 --> 00:02:59,637
Like who?
62
00:02:59,705 --> 00:03:00,941
I don't know.
63
00:03:01,009 --> 00:03:04,288
Like maybe some woman in
Guatemala who spent the night
64
00:03:04,356 --> 00:03:07,533
Singing yes! We have no
bananas in a karaoke bar,
65
00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:11,247
And now she's sleepin' in a
hot room with a broken fan
66
00:03:11,315 --> 00:03:14,959
And has no idea there's,
like, an iguana under her bed.
67
00:03:16,233 --> 00:03:19,107
You ever think
of that possibility?
68
00:03:20,481 --> 00:03:23,224
I can honestly answer
no to that question.
69
00:03:23,292 --> 00:03:26,369
Or worse, what if...
70
00:03:26,436 --> 00:03:29,813
We're just characters
in a sitcom
71
00:03:29,881 --> 00:03:32,723
Made up by some
Hollywood hack
72
00:03:32,791 --> 00:03:37,440
To support his need
for whores and narcotics?
73
00:03:37,507 --> 00:03:39,814
Did you have a wake and
bake brownie breakfast?
74
00:03:39,881 --> 00:03:41,921
I'm serious, Ally.
75
00:03:41,988 --> 00:03:44,530
I know this sounds like
my normal paranoia,
76
00:03:44,598 --> 00:03:48,343
But I've been noticing
some really weird stuff lately.
77
00:03:48,411 --> 00:03:49,346
Like what?
78
00:03:49,414 --> 00:03:51,016
Like did you ever notice
79
00:03:51,084 --> 00:03:53,359
How nobody ever does
or says anything
80
00:03:53,426 --> 00:03:57,438
While facing upstage?
81
00:03:58,239 --> 00:04:00,011
Upstage?
82
00:04:00,079 --> 00:04:02,319
Away from the cameras.
83
00:04:05,496 --> 00:04:07,734
Honey, you're starting
to scare me.
84
00:04:07,802 --> 00:04:12,047
Do you ever hear laughter?
85
00:04:16,059 --> 00:04:17,661
Do you hear that?
86
00:04:22,064 --> 00:04:24,331
Okay, babe.
87
00:04:24,398 --> 00:04:27,733
I'm gonna just make an
appointment with Dr. Sportello.
88
00:04:27,801 --> 00:04:28,634
All right, fine.
89
00:04:28,702 --> 00:04:30,002
But it won't help.
90
00:04:30,070 --> 00:04:31,537
He'll just make...
make jokes,
91
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:34,139
And his office'll
only have 3 walls.
92
00:04:35,441 --> 00:04:38,809
Something profound
happened to me today, Joy,
93
00:04:38,877 --> 00:04:41,343
Something life-altering.
94
00:04:41,411 --> 00:04:42,577
What?
95
00:04:42,645 --> 00:04:45,211
I looked into
the face of god.
96
00:04:46,179 --> 00:04:47,609
Where?
97
00:04:47,677 --> 00:04:49,575
Target.
98
00:04:49,642 --> 00:04:52,073
And what did God
look like, dear?
99
00:04:52,141 --> 00:04:55,637
Well, he's flat, 52 inches,
and appears in high definition.
100
00:04:57,004 --> 00:05:01,039
He goes by the name of Sony,
and he's all things good.
101
00:05:01,107 --> 00:05:03,107
Honey, we've
been over this.
102
00:05:03,175 --> 00:05:04,376
You... what you're really
saying to me is,
103
00:05:04,443 --> 00:05:06,611
"Joy, I'd really like to buy
a hi-def television."
104
00:05:06,679 --> 00:05:11,481
No, what I'm really saying is,
Joy, I bought a hi-def television.
105
00:05:20,348 --> 00:05:24,182
I am using bacon fat
as a moisturizer...
106
00:05:24,250 --> 00:05:28,119
And you go out and you
buy a hi-def television?
107
00:05:28,186 --> 00:05:30,020
But, honey,
it was 60% off.
108
00:05:30,088 --> 00:05:30,855
It would have been
109
00:05:30,922 --> 00:05:33,623
Financially irresponsible
not to buy it.
110
00:05:34,091 --> 00:05:35,591
Please explain that
to me, Eddie.
111
00:05:35,659 --> 00:05:37,659
Well, because it's never
gonna be this cheap again,
112
00:05:37,727 --> 00:05:40,628
And it would have cost us
more money down the road.
113
00:05:40,696 --> 00:05:41,829
At the rate
that we're going,
114
00:05:41,897 --> 00:05:43,864
I don't think we're gonna
make it down the road.
115
00:05:43,931 --> 00:05:45,231
Let me tell you
something.
116
00:05:45,299 --> 00:05:47,565
Everything is on sale.
It's gettin' me crazy.
117
00:05:47,633 --> 00:05:50,466
I'm actually thinking about
buying things I don't even want.
118
00:05:50,534 --> 00:05:53,768
I almost picked up a male
hooker 'cause he was half price.
119
00:05:53,836 --> 00:05:56,571
How does he
make ends meet?
120
00:06:03,843 --> 00:06:05,477
How are we gonna
afford this, Eddie?
121
00:06:05,545 --> 00:06:07,012
Ok, I was
thinkin' of that.
122
00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:08,580
You know what
we gotta do, Joy-Joy?
123
00:06:08,648 --> 00:06:10,616
We gotta trim the fat
just a little bit,
124
00:06:10,683 --> 00:06:12,084
Get rid of
the superficial stuff.
125
00:06:12,151 --> 00:06:13,185
Like what?
126
00:06:13,252 --> 00:06:15,120
Well, I'll tell you.
Like the beauty parlors,
127
00:06:15,187 --> 00:06:17,122
Yes, the manicures,
the pedicures,
128
00:06:17,189 --> 00:06:18,956
The makeup.
129
00:06:19,024 --> 00:06:21,358
But I will look hideous.
130
00:06:23,127 --> 00:06:24,728
Well, honey, I won't
be looking at you.
131
00:06:24,796 --> 00:06:27,030
I'll be looking at
hi-def television.
132
00:06:34,970 --> 00:06:37,072
Why am I making
all the sacrifices?
133
00:06:37,139 --> 00:06:39,507
Well, that's because you're
the one without the job, honey,
134
00:06:39,574 --> 00:06:40,975
And to be honest,
we gotta cut back
135
00:06:41,043 --> 00:06:42,777
On the food and
the liquor a little bit.
136
00:06:43,445 --> 00:06:45,546
I am already
drinking generic vodka.
137
00:06:45,613 --> 00:06:47,814
Look at this. Babsolute.
138
00:06:48,749 --> 00:06:50,183
All right.
I'll tell you what.
139
00:06:50,251 --> 00:06:51,519
I'll make
a sacrifice, too.
140
00:06:51,587 --> 00:06:52,721
I'll give up something.
141
00:06:52,789 --> 00:06:54,523
Yeah. Well, better be
something big.
142
00:06:54,591 --> 00:06:55,961
Look, I'll tell you
what we'll do.
143
00:06:56,029 --> 00:06:57,465
We'll just use one car.
144
00:06:57,533 --> 00:07:00,172
But I am driving around,
looking for work all day.
145
00:07:00,240 --> 00:07:01,441
I need the car.
146
00:07:01,510 --> 00:07:03,011
All right. Exactly, so this
is what you're gonna do.
147
00:07:03,079 --> 00:07:04,549
In the morning, you'll
drop me off at work.
148
00:07:04,617 --> 00:07:06,318
Then you'll take the car.
You'll go looking for work.
149
00:07:06,386 --> 00:07:09,254
Then you'll come back at the end of
the day and pick me up from work,
150
00:07:09,322 --> 00:07:11,223
And then we come back
here, and what do we do?
151
00:07:11,290 --> 00:07:12,958
We watch
hi-def television.
152
00:07:13,026 --> 00:07:15,160
It's crazy, but it
could actually work.
153
00:07:15,228 --> 00:07:16,695
I mean, think about it.
154
00:07:16,762 --> 00:07:18,964
We could save
on insurance and gas.
155
00:07:19,031 --> 00:07:20,799
Right. There you go.
So it's ok?
156
00:07:20,867 --> 00:07:22,067
I can keep the tv?
157
00:07:22,135 --> 00:07:24,069
Yeah, you can keep the tv,
158
00:07:24,137 --> 00:07:25,569
But the makeup stays.
159
00:07:25,637 --> 00:07:28,003
All right, honey, but just
bring it down a touch, you know.
160
00:07:29,137 --> 00:07:31,934
What are you saying,
I wear too much makeup?
161
00:07:32,002 --> 00:07:33,834
Honey, come on.
Let's be honest.
162
00:07:33,902 --> 00:07:37,167
In the morning, your pillow
looks like a crime scene.
163
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,567
I mean, there's stuff
on that pillowcase
164
00:07:44,635 --> 00:07:48,537
That would make the cast of
CSI go runnin' back to the van.
165
00:07:51,273 --> 00:07:54,341
"What did you... what did you do
with the pillow, smother a clown?"
166
00:08:05,884 --> 00:08:08,119
Doug thinks we're all
characters in a sitcom.
167
00:08:08,686 --> 00:08:10,153
Doug, if this
was a tv show,
168
00:08:10,221 --> 00:08:12,091
It would have been
canceled a long time ago.
169
00:08:12,657 --> 00:08:14,392
Scoff if you will,
170
00:08:14,460 --> 00:08:16,928
But how do you
explain this?
171
00:08:16,996 --> 00:08:18,996
Not quaker oats.
172
00:08:19,064 --> 00:08:20,764
"Uacker oats."
173
00:08:20,831 --> 00:08:24,866
Or whatties, cheerilos,
babsolute vodka,
174
00:08:24,934 --> 00:08:28,336
Or chicken
of the lake Tuna.
175
00:08:28,404 --> 00:08:31,872
These are all brands
that don't exist.
176
00:08:31,940 --> 00:08:33,040
Will you relax?
177
00:08:33,108 --> 00:08:34,408
They are
generic products.
178
00:08:34,477 --> 00:08:36,111
We're trying
to save money.
179
00:08:36,178 --> 00:08:36,945
All right, honey.
Come on.
180
00:08:37,013 --> 00:08:38,413
We gotta go.
I can't be late.
181
00:08:38,980 --> 00:08:40,014
My purse.
182
00:08:40,081 --> 00:08:41,849
Sweetie, will you run
upstairs and grab my purse?
183
00:08:41,917 --> 00:08:43,117
It's the brown one.
184
00:08:43,184 --> 00:08:45,385
Upstairs.
Yeah, that's rich.
185
00:08:46,453 --> 00:08:48,854
Honey, look, if we
run into traffic,
186
00:08:48,922 --> 00:08:50,022
We're not
gonna make it.
187
00:08:50,090 --> 00:08:51,223
I don't see it!
188
00:08:51,291 --> 00:08:53,025
It's right there
on that little table
189
00:08:53,092 --> 00:08:54,426
At the top
of the stairs!
190
00:08:54,494 --> 00:08:56,328
Hello, Jesus!
It's Eddie, the jew.
191
00:08:56,396 --> 00:08:57,562
It's not there!
192
00:08:57,630 --> 00:08:58,931
I'm ready to
go now, lord.
193
00:08:58,998 --> 00:09:00,764
I found it!
194
00:09:00,831 --> 00:09:01,764
Hold on.
195
00:09:01,832 --> 00:09:03,865
See, Eddie? Just have
a little patience.
196
00:09:03,933 --> 00:09:05,900
I saw this
on blossom.
197
00:09:05,968 --> 00:09:06,968
You, I can hit.
198
00:09:07,436 --> 00:09:08,469
Here you go.
199
00:09:08,537 --> 00:09:11,038
Ally, the dark brown one.
200
00:09:11,106 --> 00:09:14,074
Oh, for crying out loud.
Is this it?
201
00:09:14,542 --> 00:09:15,742
Look at that!
202
00:09:15,809 --> 00:09:17,910
It was sitting
right there all along.
203
00:09:17,978 --> 00:09:20,078
What a coincidence.
204
00:09:20,146 --> 00:09:21,380
All right.
205
00:09:21,447 --> 00:09:23,948
Come on.
Let's get out of here.
206
00:09:24,016 --> 00:09:24,949
This is
gonna be fun.
207
00:09:25,017 --> 00:09:27,418
Yeah. I gave up on
fun 20 years ago.
208
00:09:27,486 --> 00:09:29,152
Bye, kids.
209
00:09:29,219 --> 00:09:30,819
I'm not crazy, Ally.
210
00:09:30,887 --> 00:09:32,320
I didn't say you were.
211
00:09:32,388 --> 00:09:35,089
I tried to swear this
morning, and I couldn't.
212
00:09:35,157 --> 00:09:37,091
Come on, Doug!
213
00:09:37,158 --> 00:09:39,126
I'm serious, Ally.
Watch.
214
00:09:39,694 --> 00:09:41,328
What the "bleep"?
215
00:09:41,796 --> 00:09:44,331
See? I just got bleeped.
216
00:09:44,398 --> 00:09:47,000
And my mouth probably
got pixilated, too.
217
00:09:47,067 --> 00:09:48,735
You did not
get bleeped, Doug.
218
00:09:48,803 --> 00:09:50,237
I clearly heard you
say, "bleep,"
219
00:09:50,305 --> 00:09:52,140
And I wish that you
wouldn't say it again.
220
00:09:52,208 --> 00:09:55,676
It's inappropriate and should be
replaced with something like "heck".
221
00:09:56,577 --> 00:09:59,646
You're in on it.
222
00:09:59,713 --> 00:10:01,882
I knew this was
too good to be true.
223
00:10:01,949 --> 00:10:04,817
A hot chick like you would never
go for a guy like me in real life.
224
00:10:04,884 --> 00:10:05,617
Doug!
225
00:10:05,685 --> 00:10:09,817
Don't Doug me,
you... you actress.
226
00:10:47,565 --> 00:10:49,166
All right, all right.
That's it. That's it.
227
00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:50,234
- Just stop it.
- What?
228
00:10:50,301 --> 00:10:52,903
I'm not gonna let you ruin
the clash. It's sacrilegious.
229
00:10:52,970 --> 00:10:54,337
I'm just singing, Eddie.
230
00:10:54,405 --> 00:10:55,505
Honey, you're not
just singing.
231
00:10:55,573 --> 00:10:57,440
You're disturbing
my routine.
232
00:10:57,508 --> 00:10:58,775
What routine?
233
00:10:58,842 --> 00:11:00,843
Every morning,
I get in the car,
234
00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:03,544
I put on a book, and
I prepare for my day.
235
00:11:03,612 --> 00:11:05,346
Well, you know what?
You're not alone anymore,
236
00:11:05,414 --> 00:11:08,348
So you're just gonna have to learn
to share this space right here.
237
00:11:08,416 --> 00:11:09,482
Yeah, that's right,
and that means
238
00:11:09,550 --> 00:11:11,084
I shouldn't have
to listen to you sing.
239
00:11:11,151 --> 00:11:13,020
You like it when
I sing in the shower.
240
00:11:13,088 --> 00:11:16,059
Better acoustics,
and you're naked.
241
00:11:16,127 --> 00:11:18,027
All right.
Fine, Eddie.
242
00:11:18,095 --> 00:11:19,629
Let's just take it easy.
243
00:11:19,696 --> 00:11:23,265
We only have one mile to
go till we get to school.
244
00:11:23,333 --> 00:11:24,800
Only one.
245
00:11:35,074 --> 00:11:37,909
You're driving me crazy.
246
00:11:48,018 --> 00:11:49,718
Squirrel!
247
00:11:54,656 --> 00:11:57,358
Then I almost got a job
at a mortgage company,
248
00:11:57,425 --> 00:11:59,560
But right in the middle
of my interview,
249
00:11:59,627 --> 00:12:00,493
They foreclosed
on themselves.
250
00:12:00,561 --> 00:12:01,561
Oh, God,
I'm sorry, honey.
251
00:12:01,629 --> 00:12:03,496
No, I'm sorry, babe.
I'm going on and on.
252
00:12:03,564 --> 00:12:04,430
How was your day?
253
00:12:04,498 --> 00:12:05,498
Well, let's see.
254
00:12:05,566 --> 00:12:07,066
The exchange
student from Malawi
255
00:12:07,134 --> 00:12:10,034
Gorged himself, and then
he threw up on my shoes.
256
00:12:10,101 --> 00:12:13,334
Nobody bothered to tell him
that we serve lunch every day.
257
00:12:13,402 --> 00:12:16,635
Well, at least we come
home to hi-def tv.
258
00:12:16,703 --> 00:12:18,636
I know.
Isn't it great?
259
00:12:18,703 --> 00:12:20,337
Listen, I'm gonna
make some popcorn,
260
00:12:20,404 --> 00:12:22,272
And then I'll
meet you in there.
261
00:12:22,338 --> 00:12:23,638
It's fantastic.
262
00:12:23,705 --> 00:12:25,072
Stunning.
263
00:12:25,140 --> 00:12:26,940
Look at that
Ryan Seacrest.
264
00:12:27,008 --> 00:12:28,542
He is beautiful.
265
00:12:28,609 --> 00:12:31,011
He is a pretty,
pretty man.
266
00:12:32,780 --> 00:12:33,647
Golden Girls.
267
00:12:33,714 --> 00:12:36,416
No. That's Desperate
Housewives in hi-def.
268
00:12:43,088 --> 00:12:44,088
Hey, Joy!
269
00:12:44,156 --> 00:12:46,223
Hey, Eddie.
270
00:12:46,291 --> 00:12:47,557
How was your day?
271
00:12:48,125 --> 00:12:51,060
It was nice.
Thanks for asking.
272
00:12:51,128 --> 00:12:52,728
Did you
forget anything?
273
00:12:53,696 --> 00:12:54,566
I don't think so.
274
00:12:54,633 --> 00:12:57,904
I picked up the dry cleaning.
I shopped for dinner,
275
00:12:58,272 --> 00:12:59,239
Looked for work.
276
00:12:59,306 --> 00:13:02,841
I picked up that solvent for
your hairball in the shower.
277
00:13:02,909 --> 00:13:04,843
No, I don't think so.
278
00:13:04,911 --> 00:13:06,077
What about me, Joy?
279
00:13:06,645 --> 00:13:08,546
You forgot about me.
280
00:13:08,913 --> 00:13:10,247
Oh, God, Eddie!
281
00:13:10,314 --> 00:13:13,249
I for... I forgot to
pick you up at school.
282
00:13:13,317 --> 00:13:15,084
So, so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
283
00:13:15,152 --> 00:13:17,286
I just... I was watching
the korean news,
284
00:13:17,353 --> 00:13:18,820
And I got distracted.
It's...
285
00:13:18,888 --> 00:13:20,421
You don't even
speak korean.
286
00:13:20,489 --> 00:13:23,158
I know, but it's so
beautiful in hi-def.
287
00:13:23,225 --> 00:13:24,827
You know what it's like?
288
00:13:24,895 --> 00:13:28,497
It's like watching my manicurist
put on a play right here.
289
00:13:28,564 --> 00:13:30,198
How'd you get home,
anyway?
290
00:13:30,266 --> 00:13:31,999
The school bus,
the short one.
291
00:13:32,067 --> 00:13:35,370
The kid sittin' next to
me was lickin' the window.
292
00:13:35,437 --> 00:13:36,938
Well, you're
home now, babe.
293
00:13:37,005 --> 00:13:39,473
That's all that counts, so you
wanna watch the korean news with me?
294
00:13:39,541 --> 00:13:41,741
No, no, no, no. See,
we're not gonna watch it.
295
00:13:41,809 --> 00:13:43,343
We're gonna watch
the Phillies. Here.
296
00:13:43,411 --> 00:13:45,878
Well, not until I find out what
the weather's like in Pyongyang.
297
00:13:45,946 --> 00:13:47,279
Well, we're not gonna see
the weather in Pyongyang, ok?
298
00:13:47,347 --> 00:13:48,714
We're gonna see
the weather in Atlanta,
299
00:13:48,781 --> 00:13:50,215
Because that's where the Phillies
are playing. Give me the...
300
00:13:50,283 --> 00:13:51,416
Watch it upstairs.
301
00:13:51,484 --> 00:13:53,451
There's no hi-def tv
upstairs.
302
00:13:53,519 --> 00:13:55,052
I got here first.
303
00:13:55,120 --> 00:13:56,653
That's because I have
the unfortunate handicap
304
00:13:56,721 --> 00:13:59,156
Of having to work all day.
Give me the clicker, Joy.
305
00:13:59,224 --> 00:14:01,224
No. No. Give me...
Come on! Give me.
306
00:14:01,292 --> 00:14:02,926
Give me. This...
Give me the clicker.
307
00:14:02,993 --> 00:14:04,360
Give me the...
308
00:14:04,428 --> 00:14:05,361
Clicker.
Clicker, clicker,
309
00:14:05,428 --> 00:14:06,562
Clicker, clicker.
Give me the...
310
00:14:07,797 --> 00:14:09,098
I got the clicker!
311
00:14:09,165 --> 00:14:10,966
You wanna know something?
You wanna know something?
312
00:14:11,034 --> 00:14:13,001
You're gonna regret this,
because payback is coming,
313
00:14:13,068 --> 00:14:15,736
And payback, like someone
I know, can be a bitch.
314
00:14:25,278 --> 00:14:27,512
Giving me the silent
treatment?
315
00:14:30,314 --> 00:14:33,983
Didn't even say thank you
when I let you drive.
316
00:14:36,620 --> 00:14:38,921
Really? You're not
gonna say anything?
317
00:14:42,024 --> 00:14:44,959
I bet I can make you speak.
318
00:14:49,196 --> 00:14:53,131
I will now sing the entire
soundtrack of my youth.
319
00:15:07,576 --> 00:15:09,076
Get out.
320
00:15:09,978 --> 00:15:11,611
I'm...
321
00:15:38,591 --> 00:15:40,125
Look at you.
322
00:15:40,192 --> 00:15:41,926
Fantastic.
323
00:15:44,362 --> 00:15:47,330
Korean news,
me no likey.
324
00:15:49,467 --> 00:15:51,634
Baseball.
325
00:15:51,702 --> 00:15:53,302
Joy, are you home?
326
00:15:53,370 --> 00:15:54,937
I'm up here.
327
00:15:55,004 --> 00:15:56,438
Wait a second, fellas.
328
00:15:56,506 --> 00:15:59,074
Gotta go fake an apology.
329
00:16:05,346 --> 00:16:07,280
What's this?
330
00:16:07,348 --> 00:16:09,616
Well, I found myself
in an electronics store
331
00:16:09,683 --> 00:16:12,218
When you dumped me
on the side of the road.
332
00:16:12,285 --> 00:16:14,319
And they said
if I bought a tv,
333
00:16:14,387 --> 00:16:17,255
That I could get a ride home
in the delivery truck.
334
00:16:17,323 --> 00:16:19,056
And so I did.
335
00:16:20,192 --> 00:16:21,158
Ok, honey, listen to me.
336
00:16:21,226 --> 00:16:22,760
I'm sorry I kicked
you out of the car,
337
00:16:22,827 --> 00:16:24,661
But that doesn't mean
you should be sending us
338
00:16:24,729 --> 00:16:26,162
Into bankruptcy
to get even with me.
339
00:16:26,230 --> 00:16:28,431
Oh, no, no, Eddie. I bought
this with my own money.
340
00:16:28,499 --> 00:16:30,666
Oh, God! What did you do
in the back of the truck?
341
00:16:30,734 --> 00:16:34,236
Eddie, no. I got
myself a job today.
342
00:16:34,303 --> 00:16:36,504
I am going to be
an administrator.
343
00:16:36,573 --> 00:16:38,472
Hey, honey,
good for you!
344
00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:40,007
That's great!
345
00:16:40,074 --> 00:16:41,508
So that means
no more carpooling.
346
00:16:41,576 --> 00:16:42,976
Oh, my gosh,
how am I gonna keep up
347
00:16:43,044 --> 00:16:46,779
On my musical comedies,
liza with a "j"?
348
00:16:46,847 --> 00:16:49,081
Oh, no, Eddie!
We're still carpooling.
349
00:16:49,449 --> 00:16:51,883
So your new job is
close to the school.
350
00:16:51,951 --> 00:16:54,486
Yeah. It's actually
in the school.
351
00:16:57,656 --> 00:17:00,123
What... In...
352
00:17:00,191 --> 00:17:02,726
Honey, the school
is my sanctuary.
353
00:17:03,294 --> 00:17:04,327
I know.
354
00:17:04,395 --> 00:17:08,330
That's exactly what principal
Duffy said to me when she hired me.
355
00:17:08,398 --> 00:17:10,232
And then we laughed
and laughed.
356
00:17:12,435 --> 00:17:14,235
Oh, and by the way,
357
00:17:14,303 --> 00:17:17,004
I'm gonna be editing
your blog from now on,
358
00:17:17,072 --> 00:17:20,240
So I'm gonna require a little
bit more effort on that.
359
00:17:20,308 --> 00:17:21,708
What...
360
00:17:42,410 --> 00:17:44,244
Hello?
361
00:17:44,812 --> 00:17:46,913
What are you
doing, Doug?
362
00:17:46,981 --> 00:17:49,983
You know what
I'm lookin' into, Ally?
363
00:17:50,051 --> 00:17:51,151
The abyss.
364
00:17:51,219 --> 00:17:54,388
You wanna know
what's really weird?
365
00:17:54,455 --> 00:17:57,191
The abyss is lookin'
back into me.
366
00:17:59,360 --> 00:18:01,728
Honey, you're lookin'
into the backyard.
367
00:18:05,565 --> 00:18:08,002
Now can we stop
the nonsense,
368
00:18:08,069 --> 00:18:10,337
Get completely naked,
and do it?
369
00:18:10,405 --> 00:18:14,507
You mean really do it,
for real, like the legends say
370
00:18:14,574 --> 00:18:17,908
Donald Sutherland and Julie
Christie did in don't look now?
371
00:18:17,976 --> 00:18:21,177
I have to phrase it that
way because the censors
372
00:18:21,245 --> 00:18:23,577
Won't let me speculate
on the air.
373
00:18:23,645 --> 00:18:24,978
Yeah, Doug.
374
00:18:25,046 --> 00:18:27,979
Really, really do it.
375
00:18:33,449 --> 00:18:34,915
Action.
376
00:18:41,084 --> 00:18:45,186
I never knew you had such
a high capacity for cruelty.
377
00:18:45,254 --> 00:18:47,189
I know.
Neither did I.
378
00:18:48,591 --> 00:18:50,858
But there it is,
just as plain
379
00:18:50,926 --> 00:18:54,094
As the nose
on your big, giant head.
380
00:18:54,162 --> 00:18:57,664
You really twisted
me up good, Mr. Stark.
381
00:18:57,732 --> 00:19:01,167
Is there any way that I could
get you to unhire my wife?
382
00:19:01,235 --> 00:19:03,102
Any way?
Oh, well, yeah!
383
00:19:03,170 --> 00:19:07,439
No, I'm sure there is, but I
don't think you wanna do it.
384
00:19:08,006 --> 00:19:11,942
I mean, have you... have you
ever seen any of the Saw movies?
385
00:19:14,812 --> 00:19:17,814
What if I apologize
for calling you dim bulb
386
00:19:17,881 --> 00:19:19,448
And for ruining
your life?
387
00:19:19,516 --> 00:19:20,649
Oh, no, no!
388
00:19:21,117 --> 00:19:23,384
You are Dr. Frankenstein,
Mr. Stark.
389
00:19:23,452 --> 00:19:24,985
You have created a monster,
390
00:19:25,053 --> 00:19:28,321
And now you can't control it.
391
00:19:31,458 --> 00:19:32,725
I'll tell you what.
392
00:19:32,793 --> 00:19:34,361
I'll give you
my hi-def tv,
393
00:19:34,429 --> 00:19:36,663
Because if I have
to work with my wife,
394
00:19:36,730 --> 00:19:38,064
I'll never enjoy
anything again.
395
00:19:38,432 --> 00:19:39,532
Good.
396
00:19:39,600 --> 00:19:42,701
I'm so happy
to hear that.
397
00:19:43,737 --> 00:19:45,204
This is torture, Duffy.
398
00:19:45,271 --> 00:19:47,806
Mr. Stark,
I think not.
399
00:19:50,242 --> 00:19:54,010
I spent some time in a
"mental health facility"
400
00:19:54,078 --> 00:19:56,746
In upper Michigan,
and they considered
401
00:19:56,814 --> 00:19:59,248
A dip in the lake
to be therapeutic,
402
00:19:59,316 --> 00:20:01,483
In January. What?
403
00:20:02,885 --> 00:20:05,486
Yeah, they would
just March us out there
404
00:20:05,554 --> 00:20:08,589
In our... in our paper
gowns and flipflops
405
00:20:08,657 --> 00:20:10,858
All numbed up
on thorazine,
406
00:20:10,925 --> 00:20:13,726
And, we would
just go for a swim.
407
00:20:14,294 --> 00:20:16,095
Isn't that funny?
408
00:20:19,566 --> 00:20:21,600
A little.
409
00:20:22,668 --> 00:20:24,202
I mean, the paper
gowns are a nice...
410
00:20:24,270 --> 00:20:27,638
It's not... no, it's not funny.
It's the worst. It's the worst.
411
00:20:27,706 --> 00:20:30,274
No, it's not even close
to the worst, ok?
412
00:20:30,341 --> 00:20:34,177
Don't even get me started on
the electric shock treatments.
413
00:20:34,545 --> 00:20:36,278
I have a
prefrontal lobe
414
00:20:36,346 --> 00:20:38,580
That looks like
a waffle iron.
415
00:20:40,249 --> 00:20:41,616
Your wife stays.
416
00:20:46,021 --> 00:20:47,855
How did they ever
release you?
417
00:20:47,923 --> 00:20:49,490
Release, escape...
418
00:20:49,557 --> 00:20:51,892
Either way,
they'll never find me.
419
00:20:52,727 --> 00:20:56,062
Have a nice day,
Mr. Stark.
420
00:20:57,597 --> 00:20:58,731
What you're really
saying to me
421
00:20:58,799 --> 00:21:01,133
is, "Joy, I'd really like
to buy a hi-def television".
422
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:05,333
No, Joy, what I'm really saying
is I bought a hi-def television.
423
00:21:16,913 --> 00:21:20,249
Yeah, it's actually
in the school.
424
00:21:22,618 --> 00:21:23,618
What...
425
00:21:25,153 --> 00:21:26,754
Sorry.
426
00:21:26,822 --> 00:21:30,857
Honey, I'd explain it to you if I
could remember the friggin' line.
427
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:36,000
Sync by fant0m
www.addic7ed.com
428
00:21:36,050 --> 00:21:40,600
Repair and Synchronization by
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