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1
00:00:28,370 --> 00:00:31,440
til death is filmed in front
of a live studio audience.
2
00:00:32,490 --> 00:00:35,350
All right,I'm going to karl's
to watch the eagles game.
3
00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:36,720
Ok, what time are you gonna be home?
4
00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:37,480
I don't know.
5
00:00:37,510 --> 00:00:38,590
Late, I guess.
6
00:00:38,630 --> 00:00:39,610
Well, what time?
7
00:00:40,170 --> 00:00:41,550
Probably after you're asleep.
8
00:00:41,620 --> 00:00:45,340
Ok,I'm gonna need something with an
o'clock or a 30 at the end of it.
9
00:00:45,810 --> 00:00:46,400
Well, why?
10
00:00:46,420 --> 00:00:47,630
I mean, if you're already asleep,
11
00:00:47,670 --> 00:00:49,990
what difference does it make
what time i come home?
12
00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:54,860
Just give me a time so this conversation
doesn't end in a murder suicide.
13
00:00:55,180 --> 00:00:57,530
- Ok,11:30.
- Have fun.
14
00:00:57,940 --> 00:00:59,860
Oh, hey, on your way home,
will you pick up some milk?
15
00:00:59,910 --> 00:01:00,780
Milk.Got it.
16
00:01:00,800 --> 00:01:02,520
Uh, write it down so you don't forget.
17
00:01:02,570 --> 00:01:03,770
Honey,I'm not gonna forget.
18
00:01:03,810 --> 00:01:06,500
Extra large head, extra large brain.
19
00:01:06,510 --> 00:01:09,660
I may look weird in a visor, but I forget nada.
20
00:01:09,950 --> 00:01:11,840
Give me one of those extra large hands.
21
00:01:11,850 --> 00:01:14,160
Why? What are you... oh, come on, this is.
22
00:01:14,490 --> 00:01:17,210
Milk.
23
00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:24,870
- Hey.
- Hey.
24
00:01:24,880 --> 00:01:25,660
How you doing, karl?
25
00:01:25,670 --> 00:01:27,100
Welcome to the pleasure dome.
26
00:01:28,090 --> 00:01:30,390
Karl, this place is awesome.
27
00:01:30,430 --> 00:01:33,690
You got drums, a juke box here.
28
00:01:33,720 --> 00:01:35,390
What, did your wife die?
29
00:01:35,900 --> 00:01:40,250
I hope not,'cause she's in the kitchen
crushing mint for our mojitos.
30
00:01:40,320 --> 00:01:41,800
Oh, my god.
31
00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:43,360
- Karl, is that a...
- baby shark?
32
00:01:43,370 --> 00:01:44,980
You bet.
33
00:01:45,630 --> 00:01:47,430
Come on, sit, sit.
34
00:01:47,470 --> 00:01:50,040
His wife lets him have a baby
shark in the living room?
35
00:01:50,070 --> 00:01:53,480
Steph won't even let me do my
watercolors in the living room.
36
00:01:53,690 --> 00:01:55,050
Stogies, gentlemen?
37
00:01:55,820 --> 00:01:57,050
- Ok.
- All right.
38
00:01:57,060 --> 00:01:58,210
Hey, guys.
39
00:01:58,260 --> 00:01:59,140
Hey, jesse.
40
00:01:59,170 --> 00:02:00,660
I want you to meet the guys.
41
00:02:01,730 --> 00:02:04,900
Eddie here teaches american history
and jeff is the vice principal.
42
00:02:04,940 --> 00:02:06,140
Ooh, I like that.
43
00:02:06,170 --> 00:02:07,630
You got vice right in the title.
44
00:02:07,670 --> 00:02:09,270
That's kind of sex-ay.
45
00:02:11,240 --> 00:02:13,250
She thinks i'm sex-ay.
46
00:02:13,850 --> 00:02:15,930
Uh, ok,what do you got there?
47
00:02:15,940 --> 00:02:19,280
You're not smoking one of my cubans, are you?
48
00:02:24,620 --> 00:02:26,750
Mucho delicioso.
49
00:02:30,990 --> 00:02:32,450
Hey, baby, we're gonna watch the game,
50
00:02:32,510 --> 00:02:34,430
so if you could not play your drums.
51
00:02:34,470 --> 00:02:36,210
Oh, yeah, yeah, no problem.No problem.
52
00:02:36,220 --> 00:02:38,490
I'll just, uh,take it out on you later.
53
00:02:44,950 --> 00:02:46,270
Have fun, guys.
54
00:02:48,350 --> 00:02:49,860
So those are her drums?
55
00:02:49,880 --> 00:02:54,230
Yeah, she also plays the bass
and the electric flute.
56
00:02:54,250 --> 00:02:56,350
She's a walking jethro tull.
57
00:02:57,620 --> 00:02:58,390
Hey, babe!
58
00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:01,150
There's boobies on hbo if you're interested.
59
00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:03,470
You know I am, love.
60
00:03:03,540 --> 00:03:05,070
Don't worry, we won't miss the game.
61
00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:06,900
I've got picture in picture.
62
00:03:11,380 --> 00:03:13,140
What the hell is going on here?
63
00:03:13,210 --> 00:03:14,110
What do you mean?
64
00:03:14,130 --> 00:03:19,000
Well, your wife, she's so easy-going, cool, happy.
65
00:03:19,060 --> 00:03:20,690
Why?
66
00:03:21,170 --> 00:03:22,870
Ahh, ok,I see.
67
00:03:22,890 --> 00:03:24,440
I was married once before.
68
00:03:24,450 --> 00:03:25,860
Jesse's my second wife.
69
00:03:25,880 --> 00:03:27,310
What difference does that make?
70
00:03:27,330 --> 00:03:29,060
What difference does that make?
71
00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:30,820
You're cute as a button.
72
00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:35,590
Look, the first time you get married,
you don't know it's a trap.
73
00:03:35,620 --> 00:03:38,280
They lure you in with,
"I love the way you are."
74
00:03:38,370 --> 00:03:40,180
And then one day, bam!
75
00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:44,150
They club you like a baby seal and
they're wearing you to the opera.
76
00:03:44,810 --> 00:03:47,090
But the second time,
I went in with my eyes open.
77
00:03:47,180 --> 00:03:48,280
I had a whole list.
78
00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:51,460
I told her this is what I want,
this is what i don't want.
79
00:03:51,490 --> 00:03:52,640
It's fantastic.
80
00:03:52,670 --> 00:03:56,570
It's marriage, but it's not a pain in the ass.
81
00:04:04,850 --> 00:04:07,100
Who else knows about this?
82
00:04:07,160 --> 00:04:10,950
Anyone who's been through the
marriage ringer, my friend.
83
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:12,470
I have a question.
84
00:04:12,510 --> 00:04:13,840
Yes, jeffrey.
85
00:04:15,090 --> 00:04:19,600
When you said list, you mean actual
list, like you wrote it down?
86
00:04:19,620 --> 00:04:20,480
Yep.
87
00:04:20,500 --> 00:04:21,870
What was on the list?
88
00:04:21,900 --> 00:04:23,210
That's a good one.
89
00:04:23,610 --> 00:04:24,880
You name it.
90
00:04:24,910 --> 00:04:28,640
Uh, separate phone lines so we don't have to
take messages from each other's friends.
91
00:04:28,680 --> 00:04:31,680
Separate finances so we don't
fight over stupid stuff like money.
92
00:04:31,710 --> 00:04:32,920
What about in-laws?
93
00:04:32,930 --> 00:04:34,780
All dead!
94
00:04:35,300 --> 00:04:36,640
I know what you guys are going through.
95
00:04:36,760 --> 00:04:39,090
You're in the thick of classic first marriage.
96
00:04:39,130 --> 00:04:41,680
I bet your wife makes you dress like that.
97
00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:42,490
Oh, no,no.
98
00:04:42,520 --> 00:04:44,920
I actually picked this out myself.
99
00:04:46,860 --> 00:04:48,630
Anyway.
100
00:04:49,260 --> 00:04:52,010
You gotta clear everything with
the wife... where you're going,
101
00:04:52,060 --> 00:04:53,990
who you're gonna be with,
how long you're gonna be there,
102
00:04:54,020 --> 00:04:57,400
plus, they always make you stop
for eggs on the way home.
103
00:04:57,890 --> 00:04:59,780
Not eggs.
104
00:05:01,010 --> 00:05:02,780
Milk.
105
00:05:04,460 --> 00:05:06,330
Eggs.
106
00:05:13,140 --> 00:05:14,170
You know, I just don't understand...
107
00:05:14,180 --> 00:05:15,950
I don't want to talk for a while, ok?
108
00:05:25,150 --> 00:05:28,530
I built a successful marriage over 20 years.
109
00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:30,790
Does anybody give me a head's
up about boobies on the tv?
110
00:05:30,810 --> 00:05:33,270
No, no boobies for eddie.
111
00:05:33,650 --> 00:05:36,130
Please.Please,I'm the one who got screwed here.
112
00:05:36,140 --> 00:05:36,900
I'm a newlywed.
113
00:05:36,920 --> 00:05:38,770
I missed this whole list thing by that much.
114
00:05:38,790 --> 00:05:41,050
Your life was ruined a long time ago.
115
00:05:41,060 --> 00:05:43,920
Oh, let's face it, we're both in hell.
116
00:05:45,650 --> 00:05:49,650
I mean, don't get me wrong,
my marriage is a blessing.
117
00:05:50,970 --> 00:05:52,960
You guys, I am trying to sleep up there.
118
00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:55,350
Well, maybe you can take it out on me later.
119
00:05:56,430 --> 00:05:59,000
Who smells like cigars?
120
00:06:01,420 --> 00:06:03,970
You know, that is very unhealthy.
121
00:06:04,420 --> 00:06:05,990
Blech.
122
00:06:07,250 --> 00:06:08,400
You see that?
123
00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:10,100
Jesse doesn't care about what's unhealthy.
124
00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,550
All jesse cares about is what's cool.
125
00:06:12,660 --> 00:06:13,980
Damn it!
126
00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,730
Even her name is cool!
127
00:06:16,280 --> 00:06:17,760
Jesse.
128
00:06:18,420 --> 00:06:19,900
Who did I marry?
129
00:06:19,930 --> 00:06:21,720
Stephanie.
130
00:06:23,110 --> 00:06:24,010
Please.
131
00:06:24,040 --> 00:06:25,120
Mine's named joy.
132
00:06:25,130 --> 00:06:26,660
Talk about a mislead.
133
00:06:31,450 --> 00:06:32,500
What are you doing?
134
00:06:32,540 --> 00:06:34,850
I'm making my second marriage list.
135
00:06:34,940 --> 00:06:35,730
What?
136
00:06:35,820 --> 00:06:38,550
I can't wait around for
an actual second marriage.
137
00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:40,920
Did you ever see how much
water joy drinks in a day?
138
00:06:40,940 --> 00:06:42,860
She's gonna live forever.
139
00:06:43,210 --> 00:06:47,420
You know, steph's grandmother,
103, still plays soccer.
140
00:06:51,110 --> 00:06:52,700
Give me the damn napkin.
141
00:06:58,970 --> 00:07:01,450
Wow, how did you guys hear about this place?
142
00:07:01,540 --> 00:07:03,020
Actually, from karl.
143
00:07:03,060 --> 00:07:05,600
Yeah, karl knows his restaurants.
144
00:07:05,690 --> 00:07:06,860
Damn straight.
145
00:07:08,070 --> 00:07:11,640
I'll tell you another
thing karl knows... marriage.
146
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:14,680
Man should teach a class on marriage.
147
00:07:14,740 --> 00:07:16,500
Ooh, this chicken dish sounds interesting.
148
00:07:16,550 --> 00:07:17,750
I'm gonna go with the rib eye.
149
00:07:17,790 --> 00:07:19,670
Steak? Honey, no.
150
00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:22,600
You already have way too
much red meat in your diet.
151
00:07:32,230 --> 00:07:33,810
What... what is that?
152
00:07:35,620 --> 00:07:38,630
It's my, um,napkin list.
153
00:07:39,150 --> 00:07:40,660
What's a napkin list?
154
00:07:40,700 --> 00:07:42,370
Well, when we were at
karl's the other night,
155
00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:45,710
he was telling us how before he got
married for the second time,
156
00:07:45,730 --> 00:07:50,520
that he actually made up a list
of things that he wanted in his marriage.
157
00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:53,020
And, you know, instead of
moving on to another wife,
158
00:07:53,030 --> 00:07:55,340
because I think you're
pretty great, you know,
159
00:07:55,350 --> 00:07:59,970
with a couple tweaks, I thought
that I would make my list right now
160
00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:03,550
so I could dance with
the girl what brung me.
161
00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:07,900
Are you insane?
162
00:08:07,990 --> 00:08:10,320
Seriously, eddie, that was horrible.
163
00:08:10,340 --> 00:08:13,070
Yeah, do you think before you talk?
164
00:08:16,590 --> 00:08:19,540
He has a napkin list, too, everybody.
165
00:08:19,580 --> 00:08:21,020
- Yes.
- What?
166
00:08:21,090 --> 00:08:23,050
- This is an outrageous...
- no, no,no, show...
167
00:08:23,100 --> 00:08:25,260
- you're gonna show them the list...
- my jacket!
168
00:08:25,270 --> 00:08:26,960
Hey, hey, come on! Get off my jacket!
169
00:08:26,980 --> 00:08:28,000
Here... what...?
170
00:08:31,940 --> 00:08:32,740
Great plan, jeff.
171
00:08:32,760 --> 00:08:35,620
Nothing proves your innocence
like eating a napkin.
172
00:08:36,770 --> 00:08:39,250
Did you really anticipate this going well,
173
00:08:39,260 --> 00:08:41,400
presenting me with a list of demands?
174
00:08:44,680 --> 00:08:46,740
Not demands.
175
00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:48,580
Adjustments.
176
00:08:50,810 --> 00:08:52,380
Our marriage is a blessing.
177
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,270
Ok, you're gonna have to take him
somewhere and deal with that.
178
00:08:59,330 --> 00:09:00,490
Come on, come on.
179
00:09:00,560 --> 00:09:01,440
What's our goal here?
180
00:09:01,470 --> 00:09:03,190
Do you want to make it come down or go up?
181
00:09:05,810 --> 00:09:06,610
Ok.
182
00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,110
Let's hear this list.
183
00:09:09,180 --> 00:09:10,010
Ok.
184
00:09:10,020 --> 00:09:11,100
But before i read the list,
185
00:09:11,150 --> 00:09:15,940
I need you to promise me that you're
going to listen with an open mind.
186
00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:19,580
That's better.
187
00:09:20,330 --> 00:09:23,600
I would like to eat whatever
I want, whenever I want.
188
00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:25,310
I would like to wear a turtleneck
189
00:09:25,380 --> 00:09:30,110
without you comparing me to
various 1970s television stars.
190
00:09:30,140 --> 00:09:31,750
I want separate phone lines.
191
00:09:31,800 --> 00:09:35,100
I don't want to have to tell you
what time I'm coming home.
192
00:09:35,270 --> 00:09:37,450
- I want a baby shark...
- ok.
193
00:09:37,460 --> 00:09:39,500
I'm gonna have to stop you there.
194
00:09:39,590 --> 00:09:42,880
What is the big deal about me asking
you when you're coming home?
195
00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:44,360
Well, why do you even have to ask?
196
00:09:44,380 --> 00:09:45,760
Because, we're married.
197
00:09:45,790 --> 00:09:46,930
That's what wives do.
198
00:09:46,940 --> 00:09:48,670
Yeah, first wives.
199
00:09:49,730 --> 00:09:51,030
Oh, my god.
200
00:09:51,070 --> 00:09:54,340
Let me see the rest of this moron manifesto.
201
00:09:56,240 --> 00:09:57,790
Joy, listen to me.
202
00:09:59,590 --> 00:10:01,480
Do you want to be on oprah?
203
00:10:03,990 --> 00:10:04,670
What?
204
00:10:04,690 --> 00:10:09,260
We do the first second marriage thing,
then we write the book, bam!
205
00:10:09,280 --> 00:10:12,190
Listen, baby, take this ride with me.
206
00:10:12,670 --> 00:10:16,210
If it'll get you to stop flapping
those enormous gums of yours,I'm in.
207
00:10:18,480 --> 00:10:20,350
You know what, guys, just order without us.
208
00:10:20,430 --> 00:10:22,730
Jeff had an allergic reaction
to the ink on the napkin,
209
00:10:22,810 --> 00:10:25,160
and his head blew up like a pumpkin.
210
00:10:25,220 --> 00:10:27,590
He's waiting for me on the floor
of the ladies' room.
211
00:10:27,610 --> 00:10:29,210
I should get back.
212
00:10:29,260 --> 00:10:31,200
He's pretty scared.
213
00:10:40,610 --> 00:10:42,400
Oh, look.
214
00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:45,830
They finally made you an official
member of the mod squad.
215
00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:46,860
Buh-buh-buh.
216
00:10:46,930 --> 00:10:50,280
See, now, that sounds like something
my first wife used to say.
217
00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:52,130
But my second wife would say...
218
00:10:52,150 --> 00:10:54,870
neat shirt.Take me now.
219
00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:57,330
Ok, now that's good, but why not make it great?
220
00:10:57,360 --> 00:10:58,860
I-I think it should sound something like...
221
00:10:58,870 --> 00:11:00,620
I'm not saying it again.
222
00:11:01,010 --> 00:11:02,140
Ok.
223
00:11:02,190 --> 00:11:04,650
Well, as you know, I don't have to tell you
224
00:11:04,680 --> 00:11:08,770
where I'm going per our
aforementioned napkin agreement,
225
00:11:09,850 --> 00:11:13,250
but if you... No, no,no, honey,
you have your own phone line.
226
00:11:13,270 --> 00:11:16,660
This is eddie's hot line, for my ears only.
227
00:11:17,270 --> 00:11:18,940
Yell-o?
228
00:11:18,970 --> 00:11:21,100
Hey, what's shakin', amigo?
229
00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:24,000
I don't have to tell you this, but it's karl.
230
00:11:25,870 --> 00:11:26,570
Yeah.
231
00:11:26,660 --> 00:11:28,530
Turtleneck, ribbed.
232
00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:30,250
You'll be pleased.
233
00:11:30,900 --> 00:11:32,070
Ciao.
234
00:11:32,380 --> 00:11:34,970
All right, honey, now I'm going to tell
you when I'm going to be home, so...
235
00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:39,890
look, I don't care where you're going
or what time you're gonna be home.
236
00:11:39,930 --> 00:11:43,120
Sweetheart, let me sum this up for you.
237
00:11:43,990 --> 00:11:46,120
You saw a baby shark.
238
00:11:46,150 --> 00:11:49,560
You got your panties all in a twist over it.
239
00:11:49,750 --> 00:11:52,970
Just go do what you've got to do, ok?
240
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:54,830
Oh, believe me, lady.
241
00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:57,880
What I've gotta do is gettin' done.
242
00:11:59,300 --> 00:12:01,010
Your fly's open.
243
00:12:06,430 --> 00:12:08,150
It's the way I want it.
244
00:12:08,850 --> 00:12:13,710
It's my choice, my life, my fly.
245
00:12:23,430 --> 00:12:25,030
That dinner was fantastic.
246
00:12:25,070 --> 00:12:26,150
I am stuffed.
247
00:12:26,220 --> 00:12:29,210
27 slider burgers in 25 minutes.
248
00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:32,190
You set a new burger bonanza record.
249
00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:36,570
They're puttin' my picture on the wall,
right next to john goodman.
250
00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:41,040
All right, the night is young,
we just had dinner, what's next?
251
00:12:42,700 --> 00:12:44,390
Anybody, come on, who's got ideas?
252
00:12:44,470 --> 00:12:46,730
There are no bad ideas.
253
00:12:46,760 --> 00:12:47,800
Mini-golf.
254
00:12:47,830 --> 00:12:49,260
Bad idea.
255
00:12:49,270 --> 00:12:50,860
Karl, hit me.
256
00:12:50,900 --> 00:12:55,020
There's a tranny bar up yonder
that makes a mean appletini.
257
00:12:56,990 --> 00:12:58,320
Or a movie.
258
00:12:58,350 --> 00:12:59,450
Yes.Movie.
259
00:12:59,460 --> 00:13:02,010
All right, jeffy, hit me with some movie times.
260
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:02,690
Uh, all righty.
261
00:13:02,700 --> 00:13:05,760
Well, we got a 7:40, missed that.
262
00:13:05,770 --> 00:13:07,620
8:10, missed that.
263
00:13:07,650 --> 00:13:10,880
And I gotta be home by 9:00,
so this is not gonna work.
264
00:13:10,910 --> 00:13:11,630
9:00?
265
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:14,290
Yeah, steph's still pretty upset
about that whole napkin thing,
266
00:13:14,300 --> 00:13:17,270
and I gotta show her all the
receipts of where I've been, so.
267
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,200
Well, there goes the tranny bar.
268
00:13:23,920 --> 00:13:26,510
All right, we got rid of the dead weight.
269
00:13:26,540 --> 00:13:28,130
What's next?
270
00:13:28,180 --> 00:13:32,090
Well, it's a school night, and I got a hundred
french papers to grade from a hundred kids
271
00:13:32,110 --> 00:13:34,870
who can't speak a lick of french,
272
00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:37,900
so maybe we should call it a night?
273
00:13:37,940 --> 00:13:41,260
How's this for french... no way, jose!
274
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:44,940
I made a big deal to joy about
how I'm staying out late tonight.
275
00:13:44,980 --> 00:13:48,370
You and I, we're going to
watch the sunrise together.
276
00:13:48,390 --> 00:13:51,410
Um, no,we're not.
277
00:13:51,430 --> 00:13:53,230
We're gonna get crazy!
278
00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:54,410
Crazy how?
279
00:13:54,440 --> 00:13:56,360
I don't know, we're second marriage guys.
280
00:13:56,380 --> 00:13:59,090
I'm sure there's a way for us to get crazy.
281
00:13:59,470 --> 00:14:02,570
Hey, let's take our seatbelts off, huh?
282
00:14:13,460 --> 00:14:15,340
You, uh,you got that dinging.
283
00:14:15,380 --> 00:14:16,530
I know it's dingin'.
284
00:14:16,570 --> 00:14:18,240
I like the dingin'.
285
00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:20,400
It's crazy.
286
00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:33,060
Man, this night is finally gettin' into gear.
287
00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:35,550
We're hittin' our stride, huh, karl?
288
00:14:37,030 --> 00:14:38,950
Karl, wake up.
289
00:14:40,130 --> 00:14:41,390
Oh, no.
290
00:14:41,490 --> 00:14:43,920
Are we still circling the mall?
291
00:14:44,780 --> 00:14:46,430
And you're eating again!
292
00:14:46,460 --> 00:14:47,800
I got a ton of energy!
293
00:14:47,810 --> 00:14:50,790
Hey, let's go swim in a quarry.
294
00:14:51,570 --> 00:14:53,530
Geez, you're flying, man?
295
00:14:53,610 --> 00:14:55,110
What the hell you got in that cup?
296
00:14:55,150 --> 00:14:59,110
I combined 3 different energy drinks,
plus a splash of cranberry juice.
297
00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:00,400
Cranberry juice? What's that about?
298
00:15:00,420 --> 00:15:03,340
Ah, I got a touch of the ouchies when I urinate.
299
00:15:03,380 --> 00:15:06,330
For god sake, sit still!
300
00:15:06,460 --> 00:15:08,470
I'm not moving.
301
00:15:08,860 --> 00:15:10,110
Ok, we gotta find a 7-11.
302
00:15:10,170 --> 00:15:12,280
I gotta refill this bitch.
303
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:13,710
Eddie, slow down.
304
00:15:13,740 --> 00:15:15,480
You're pushing this too hard.
305
00:15:15,500 --> 00:15:16,310
I mean, look at you.
306
00:15:16,420 --> 00:15:18,040
You're stuffed full of cheese steak,
307
00:15:18,060 --> 00:15:21,290
you're all hopped up
on experimental sodas.
308
00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:23,520
Throttle down, big man.
309
00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:25,370
Time to go home.
310
00:15:25,430 --> 00:15:27,220
I can't go home!
311
00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:30,320
I told joy that the
night was mine, damn it!
312
00:15:30,340 --> 00:15:31,530
That I'm gonna own the night, damn it!
313
00:15:31,570 --> 00:15:33,950
You're with me or you're not, damn it!
314
00:15:39,690 --> 00:15:40,940
Damn it.
315
00:15:48,430 --> 00:15:49,770
All right.
316
00:15:49,810 --> 00:15:51,600
We're still alive.
317
00:15:51,630 --> 00:15:53,050
We're still here.
318
00:15:53,390 --> 00:15:57,550
We're still rumblin' through the suburbs.
319
00:16:00,850 --> 00:16:04,740
* She said do you come
from the land down under? *
320
00:16:06,490 --> 00:16:09,660
* Women glow, and men plunder *
321
00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:13,640
* Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder? *
322
00:16:14,770 --> 00:16:19,200
* You better run, you better take cover *
323
00:16:40,550 --> 00:16:42,500
can I help you find something?
324
00:16:42,870 --> 00:16:45,140
Yeah,I'm looking at your energy drinks,
325
00:16:45,150 --> 00:16:49,470
and I don't see any chronic
lava with extra ginkgo biloba.
326
00:16:49,510 --> 00:16:51,030
I don't think we carry that one.
327
00:16:51,700 --> 00:16:54,300
Too bad, too bad.
328
00:16:55,040 --> 00:16:56,510
So.
329
00:16:56,550 --> 00:16:58,510
Lee, huh?
330
00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:00,710
I'm looking for a wing man.
331
00:17:01,210 --> 00:17:02,930
What time you get off tonight?
332
00:17:02,980 --> 00:17:07,360
I'm off at 11:00, but I have a
rage-a-holics meeting at 11:30.
333
00:17:07,370 --> 00:17:12,410
It's not much time, but it does give us a
half hour to get drunk in the parking lot.
334
00:17:14,510 --> 00:17:18,610
Ok, lee,I'm gonna walk that way,
and I don't want you to follow me.
335
00:17:28,750 --> 00:17:30,190
Ah, milk.
336
00:17:30,230 --> 00:17:31,680
Remember me?
337
00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:33,510
Excuse me.
338
00:17:34,690 --> 00:17:36,560
Wife sent you out for milk, too?
339
00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:37,680
No.
340
00:17:37,730 --> 00:17:39,920
I'm getting it for myself.
341
00:17:39,970 --> 00:17:44,340
I'm also getting this low-fat
cottage cheese, which I love.
342
00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:46,840
Wanna go to a tranny bar?
343
00:17:55,450 --> 00:17:57,730
It's a freezing tuesday night in philadelphia.
344
00:17:57,780 --> 00:18:00,120
The time is 10:02.
345
00:18:00,690 --> 00:18:02,100
10:02?
346
00:18:02,130 --> 00:18:04,400
What, is time moving backwards?
347
00:18:05,270 --> 00:18:07,350
* I'll be gone *
348
00:18:07,370 --> 00:18:09,750
* I'm all out of love *
349
00:18:09,770 --> 00:18:12,110
* I'm so lost without you *
350
00:18:12,220 --> 00:18:16,420
* I know you were right believing for so long *
351
00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:20,930
* I'm all out of love what am I without you? *
352
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:28,840
* I can't be too late to
say that I was so wrong *
353
00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:40,410
crazy.
354
00:19:20,250 --> 00:19:21,440
City and listing.
355
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:24,850
Uh, in cheltenham, for a joy stark.
356
00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:30,740
Sorry, sir, that number is not listed.
357
00:19:31,490 --> 00:19:32,440
What are you talking about?
358
00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:34,080
That's my wife.
359
00:19:34,170 --> 00:19:37,050
I'm sorry, it's at the customer's request.
360
00:19:37,090 --> 00:19:41,190
Are you telling me that my own wife
doesn't want me to have her phone number?
361
00:19:42,210 --> 00:19:43,530
I don't know, sir.
362
00:19:54,670 --> 00:19:56,310
What's going on? What's happening?
363
00:19:56,690 --> 00:20:01,800
Well, what's happening is, after consuming
6 trays of miniature burgers
364
00:20:01,890 --> 00:20:08,990
and several liters of energy beverages as
well as spoonfuls of pineapple cottage cheese
365
00:20:09,080 --> 00:20:13,070
that I later discovered was severely expired,
366
00:20:13,100 --> 00:20:16,440
I-I fell asleep in the car.
367
00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:17,620
And I haven't looked,
368
00:20:17,710 --> 00:20:19,770
but I'm pretty sure that my toes broke off
369
00:20:19,780 --> 00:20:22,880
and are rolling around in my shoes like dice.
370
00:20:24,420 --> 00:20:25,620
Anyway.
371
00:20:26,830 --> 00:20:32,030
I realized something, that I'm not cut
out for this second marriage stuff.
372
00:20:32,050 --> 00:20:37,780
I was a fool to think that
I could improve on what we had.
373
00:20:40,180 --> 00:20:42,040
You ok?
374
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:46,480
Sorry, I thought i was going to throw up again.
375
00:20:49,690 --> 00:20:51,350
Anyway, I figured out,
376
00:20:51,410 --> 00:20:56,190
left to my own devices,
I would be dead within days.
377
00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:58,030
So, please, joy.
378
00:20:58,360 --> 00:21:00,960
I want our first marriage back.
379
00:21:01,750 --> 00:21:04,200
I remembered to get your milk.
380
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:09,690
This is eggnog.
381
00:21:14,350 --> 00:21:15,760
I'll be right back.
382
00:21:15,770 --> 00:21:20,160
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00:21:20,660 --> 00:21:24,750
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