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1
00:00:08,574 --> 00:00:12,443
It's a beautiful morning
at Dunder Mifflin--
2
00:00:12,511 --> 00:00:14,646
Or as I like to call it...
Great Bratton.
3
00:00:14,713 --> 00:00:17,348
Keep it running.
4
00:00:17,416 --> 00:00:19,817
Do I love being manager?
5
00:00:19,885 --> 00:00:22,921
I love my kids.
I love real estate.
6
00:00:22,988 --> 00:00:25,189
I love ceramics.
I love my job.
7
00:00:25,257 --> 00:00:26,824
I-I love wrestling.
8
00:00:26,892 --> 00:00:29,294
Find out what language this is.
9
00:00:35,968 --> 00:00:37,835
Okay. Team building.
10
00:00:37,903 --> 00:00:41,372
On this side of the room,
Stanley, Phyllis, Jim,
11
00:00:41,440 --> 00:00:43,541
Ted, Elroy.
12
00:00:43,609 --> 00:00:47,478
On this side of the room,
Pam, Meredith, Phyllis, Creed...
13
00:00:47,546 --> 00:00:50,715
He never called a meeting.
14
00:00:50,783 --> 00:00:52,250
Bo...Body.
Bo...Body.
15
00:00:52,318 --> 00:00:55,586
What does the first "b"
stand for?
16
00:00:55,654 --> 00:00:57,255
What are we doing?
17
00:00:57,323 --> 00:00:59,257
We're making acronyms.
Okay!
18
00:00:59,325 --> 00:01:00,725
What does the first "b"
stand for?
19
00:01:02,061 --> 00:01:03,061
Business!
20
00:01:03,128 --> 00:01:04,329
I like it!
21
00:01:04,396 --> 00:01:05,730
Business.
22
00:01:05,798 --> 00:01:07,332
Good, Kevin!
23
00:01:07,399 --> 00:01:09,100
All right, the "o"...
24
00:01:09,168 --> 00:01:11,936
We need a new manager.
25
00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:20,392
Sync by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
26
00:01:27,820 --> 00:01:30,088
Your paper experience
is very interesting.
27
00:01:30,156 --> 00:01:31,957
Do you think you could
use that experience
28
00:01:32,024 --> 00:01:33,258
to inform decisions here?
29
00:01:33,326 --> 00:01:35,961
Absolutely, I--
Yes.
30
00:01:36,028 --> 00:01:38,096
In fact, I actually have
a three-step plan
31
00:01:38,164 --> 00:01:40,599
that I believe could effectively
double your profits.
32
00:01:40,666 --> 00:01:43,869
- Really?
- Yeah.
33
00:01:43,936 --> 00:01:46,037
What is it?
34
00:01:47,373 --> 00:01:48,707
Nice try.
35
00:01:50,176 --> 00:01:51,943
Uh...
I'm sorry.
36
00:01:52,011 --> 00:01:53,945
W-what is your
three-step plan?
37
00:01:54,013 --> 00:01:56,915
Well, I mean, I can't
just hand you my plan.
38
00:01:56,983 --> 00:01:58,116
I mean, if you guys
give me the job,
39
00:01:58,184 --> 00:02:00,318
then-- Then you'll get
the plan.
40
00:02:00,386 --> 00:02:02,120
Well...lt's an interview,
41
00:02:02,188 --> 00:02:03,755
and we don't know
that you really have the plan.
42
00:02:03,823 --> 00:02:05,757
I'm not gonna just make up
that I have a plan.
43
00:02:05,825 --> 00:02:07,626
I got a plan.
Believe me, you guys want it.
44
00:02:07,693 --> 00:02:08,894
You're in paper, right?
45
00:02:08,961 --> 00:02:10,328
How do we know that
if you don't...
46
00:02:10,396 --> 00:02:12,297
You could just be saying it
to get the job.
47
00:02:12,365 --> 00:02:14,566
I guess I could be if I was...
48
00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:16,134
Who would do that?
49
00:02:16,202 --> 00:02:17,369
How about this.
50
00:02:17,436 --> 00:02:18,770
Why don't you give us
a part of the plan,
51
00:02:18,838 --> 00:02:20,305
and that way
we know you have it.
52
00:02:20,373 --> 00:02:21,506
Tell you what.
53
00:02:21,574 --> 00:02:23,141
I'll give you
part three of part two.
54
00:02:23,209 --> 00:02:25,277
Not gonna give you
a whole part.
55
00:02:25,344 --> 00:02:26,344
Okay.
56
00:02:26,412 --> 00:02:30,248
Color-code
said document. TM.
57
00:02:32,051 --> 00:02:34,019
- Did you just trademark that?
- W-what?
58
00:02:34,086 --> 00:02:36,788
That's a verbal trademark.
That's an agreement.
59
00:02:36,856 --> 00:02:38,890
We are the search committee...
60
00:02:38,958 --> 00:02:40,292
Hand-picked by our CEO
61
00:02:40,359 --> 00:02:43,028
and tasked to find
this branch's new manager.
62
00:02:43,095 --> 00:02:45,330
Not everyone we meet
will be good,
63
00:02:45,398 --> 00:02:47,666
but someone's
bound to be, right?
64
00:02:47,733 --> 00:02:48,767
And to be honest,
65
00:02:48,834 --> 00:02:50,302
I think a lot of
the decent candidates
66
00:02:50,369 --> 00:02:51,469
are right here in house.
67
00:02:51,537 --> 00:02:53,505
So I'm not too worried.
68
00:02:53,573 --> 00:02:55,273
But I'm really excited
to spend a lot of time
69
00:02:55,341 --> 00:02:57,175
with Toby and Gabe.
70
00:02:57,243 --> 00:03:00,011
Did you know
that Gabe's last name was Lewis?
71
00:03:00,079 --> 00:03:01,980
I had no idea.
72
00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:03,181
Good morning.
73
00:03:03,249 --> 00:03:04,349
- Morning.
- Good morning.
74
00:03:04,417 --> 00:03:06,184
Good morning.
75
00:03:06,252 --> 00:03:08,853
Did you have a nice drive in?
76
00:03:08,921 --> 00:03:11,356
I did.
77
00:03:11,424 --> 00:03:13,191
I have a solid
relationship with Jo,
78
00:03:13,259 --> 00:03:14,793
the company's owner.
79
00:03:14,860 --> 00:03:16,294
I have management experience.
80
00:03:16,362 --> 00:03:18,330
I have a good friendship
with Jim,
81
00:03:18,397 --> 00:03:20,031
the head of
the search committee.
82
00:03:20,099 --> 00:03:24,436
And it doesn't hurt that I'm...
83
00:03:24,503 --> 00:03:27,138
Black!
84
00:03:28,741 --> 00:03:31,176
It's good.
I really hope you get it.
85
00:03:31,243 --> 00:03:34,012
The manager job?
Naw, I'm barely interested.
86
00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:35,513
I just can't not go for it,
you know.
87
00:03:35,581 --> 00:03:36,715
It's not the Bernard way.
88
00:03:36,782 --> 00:03:38,450
We give it the old college try,
89
00:03:38,517 --> 00:03:40,418
and then in defeat,
we show grace.
90
00:03:40,486 --> 00:03:42,854
Still...I'd really
like to see this office
91
00:03:42,922 --> 00:03:44,923
with you in the boss's chair.
92
00:03:44,991 --> 00:03:45,957
Don't even...
93
00:03:47,226 --> 00:03:48,860
- You in the boss's chair!
- Eeehhh! No.
94
00:03:48,928 --> 00:03:51,363
In my family, you don't
really go out and get things.
95
00:03:51,430 --> 00:03:53,765
If you want something,
you write it on a list
96
00:03:53,833 --> 00:03:55,634
and then the housekeeper
goes out and gets it
97
00:03:55,701 --> 00:03:57,569
on wednesdays and Fridays.
98
00:03:57,637 --> 00:03:59,571
So...I don't know.
99
00:03:59,639 --> 00:04:02,173
I guess you could say
this job is on my list and...
100
00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:06,177
We'll see what rosa
comes back with.
101
00:04:09,248 --> 00:04:10,515
Did you hear anything?
102
00:04:10,583 --> 00:04:12,550
Oh...I'm sure
they'll let us know
103
00:04:12,618 --> 00:04:14,386
when they get the results.
104
00:04:15,955 --> 00:04:17,822
It turns out that Erin was born
105
00:04:17,890 --> 00:04:21,426
in the basic time and region
that I gave away a child.
106
00:04:21,494 --> 00:04:24,062
So Phyllis might be my mom.
107
00:04:24,130 --> 00:04:26,798
I mean,
the chances are tiny, but...
108
00:04:26,866 --> 00:04:29,200
Yeah.
But probably not.
109
00:04:29,268 --> 00:04:31,436
I mean, it was
a big year for babies.
110
00:04:31,504 --> 00:04:33,405
Porky's had come out.
Yeah.
111
00:04:33,472 --> 00:04:35,707
I'm sure I was just
another porky's baby.
112
00:04:35,775 --> 00:04:37,909
But why not find out?
Yeah.
113
00:04:43,649 --> 00:04:45,917
Should you really be
so blatant about that?
114
00:04:45,985 --> 00:04:47,318
They won't make me manager,
115
00:04:47,386 --> 00:04:49,154
and I won't settle
for anything less.
116
00:04:49,221 --> 00:04:50,955
I've gone about as far
as I can here.
117
00:04:51,023 --> 00:04:52,791
That's obvious.
118
00:04:52,858 --> 00:04:54,526
Time to take my talents
elsewhere.
119
00:04:54,593 --> 00:04:56,261
Are you really gonna
apply for work
120
00:04:56,328 --> 00:04:57,729
at Scranton Breadworks?
121
00:04:57,797 --> 00:04:59,898
Bread is the paper
of the food industry.
122
00:04:59,965 --> 00:05:03,201
You write your sandwich on it.
123
00:05:03,269 --> 00:05:05,036
Can you do any better
on salary?
124
00:05:05,104 --> 00:05:07,205
Unfortunately,
that range is set at corporate.
125
00:05:07,273 --> 00:05:09,274
What about mileage
when I use my car?
126
00:05:09,341 --> 00:05:11,309
I mean,
gas ain't cheap, you know.
127
00:05:11,377 --> 00:05:13,311
We think that
25? a mile is pretty generous.
128
00:05:13,379 --> 00:05:16,281
How 'bout 27 and, uh...
129
00:05:16,348 --> 00:05:17,682
When I make long-distance
calls
130
00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:21,553
will they be monitored,
or is it on the honor system?
131
00:05:21,620 --> 00:05:23,054
Okay.
132
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:30,095
How odd!
133
00:05:30,162 --> 00:05:33,098
A very unusual phone call
from the senator's office.
134
00:05:33,165 --> 00:05:35,300
The senator wants me
to have lunch with him
135
00:05:35,367 --> 00:05:37,068
at the botanical gardens.
136
00:05:37,136 --> 00:05:38,503
The botanical gardens...
137
00:05:38,571 --> 00:05:41,773
Scranton's hidden gem.
138
00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:45,243
Don't eat any berries
you don't recognize.
139
00:05:45,311 --> 00:05:49,247
How will your experience
selling refinery equipment
140
00:05:49,315 --> 00:05:51,483
translate to our
smaller scale here?
141
00:05:51,550 --> 00:05:52,984
You don't work in sales,
do you?
142
00:05:53,052 --> 00:05:54,986
Uh...Human resources.
143
00:05:55,054 --> 00:05:58,957
You see,
I sit across from a man...
144
00:05:59,024 --> 00:06:02,961
I see his face.
I see his eyes.
145
00:06:03,028 --> 00:06:07,699
Now, does it matter
if he wants $100 of paper
146
00:06:07,767 --> 00:06:10,702
or $100 million
of deep-sea drilling equipment?
147
00:06:10,770 --> 00:06:11,970
Don't be a fool.
148
00:06:12,037 --> 00:06:14,139
He wants respect.
149
00:06:14,206 --> 00:06:16,141
He wants love.
150
00:06:16,208 --> 00:06:19,144
He wants to be younger.
He wants to be attractive.
151
00:06:19,211 --> 00:06:21,613
There is no such thing
152
00:06:21,680 --> 00:06:23,882
as a product.
153
00:06:23,949 --> 00:06:26,317
Don't ever think there is.
154
00:06:26,385 --> 00:06:29,254
Ere is only sex.
155
00:06:29,321 --> 00:06:31,790
Everything is sex.
156
00:06:31,857 --> 00:06:34,692
You understand
that what I'm telling you
157
00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:38,096
is a universal truth, Toby.
158
00:06:38,164 --> 00:06:39,697
Yes.
159
00:06:39,765 --> 00:06:41,366
Okay, I-I--
160
00:06:41,433 --> 00:06:42,867
I am...I'm almost
a little concerned
161
00:06:42,935 --> 00:06:46,137
that you might be overqualified
for the position.
162
00:06:46,205 --> 00:06:48,773
Do you, um...
Do you think that you are?
163
00:06:48,841 --> 00:06:50,341
Do I look like someone
who--
164
00:06:50,409 --> 00:06:52,210
Who'd waste my own time?
165
00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:54,179
No.
166
00:06:55,915 --> 00:06:58,516
Can y--
167
00:06:58,584 --> 00:07:01,953
You are a man
of great confidence.
168
00:07:02,021 --> 00:07:04,355
Could you speak
a little more to that
169
00:07:04,423 --> 00:07:07,358
and what the role of confidence
170
00:07:07,426 --> 00:07:10,195
would be in a dialogue
171
00:07:10,262 --> 00:07:11,896
with a subordinate?
172
00:07:11,964 --> 00:07:13,798
Will you be heard?
173
00:07:13,866 --> 00:07:15,834
Will you have a voice?
174
00:07:15,901 --> 00:07:18,136
Will I steamroll over you?
175
00:07:18,204 --> 00:07:23,374
Do you feel heard
right now, Jim?
176
00:07:23,442 --> 00:07:27,011
Do you have a voice right now?
177
00:07:27,079 --> 00:07:29,147
You can answer me.
Yes.
178
00:07:29,215 --> 00:07:31,182
That was your choice, not mine.
179
00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:34,719
The fallacy is that it is
up to the steamroller.
180
00:07:34,787 --> 00:07:37,388
It is up to the object...
181
00:07:37,456 --> 00:07:39,691
Whether it will be
flattened or not.
182
00:07:39,758 --> 00:07:42,160
And I can tell just from
the small interaction
183
00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:43,394
we've had already,
184
00:07:43,462 --> 00:07:45,163
you won't be flattened
by anybody.
185
00:07:45,231 --> 00:07:46,431
Do you agree with me, Jim?
186
00:07:46,498 --> 00:07:49,367
- Yes.
- Yes, you do.
187
00:08:09,455 --> 00:08:11,890
He creeps me out.
188
00:08:11,957 --> 00:08:14,726
But I think
he might be a genius.
189
00:08:21,991 --> 00:08:23,992
Good luck, Darryl.
190
00:08:24,059 --> 00:08:25,927
Thank you.
191
00:08:25,995 --> 00:08:27,061
Think about it.
192
00:08:27,129 --> 00:08:28,863
What other mammal,
besides humans,
193
00:08:28,931 --> 00:08:31,132
drinks the milk
of another mammal?
194
00:08:31,200 --> 00:08:33,668
I mean, you don't see a bear
drinking raccoon milk.
195
00:08:35,571 --> 00:08:38,539
So this is cool.
I think we make a good fit.
196
00:08:38,607 --> 00:08:41,342
Oh. Uh, we haven't
started the interview yet.
197
00:08:41,410 --> 00:08:43,511
Were you--
Were you joking?
198
00:08:45,381 --> 00:08:48,316
Uh...Yes.
I was.
199
00:08:48,384 --> 00:08:51,519
Little joke.
200
00:08:51,587 --> 00:08:54,689
So how would you go about
settling interpersonal conflicts
201
00:08:54,757 --> 00:08:56,157
within the office?
202
00:08:56,225 --> 00:08:58,693
I thought that was your job.
203
00:08:58,761 --> 00:09:00,995
Well, it's one of my strengths,
204
00:09:01,063 --> 00:09:02,664
but it's the manager's job.
205
00:09:04,733 --> 00:09:06,434
Well, for instance,
how did you deal with it
206
00:09:06,502 --> 00:09:07,835
when two warehouse guys
got into a fight?
207
00:09:07,903 --> 00:09:09,304
I'll answer that, Jim.
208
00:09:09,371 --> 00:09:12,707
I would use it
as an opportunity to teach...
209
00:09:12,775 --> 00:09:16,577
Uh, about actions
and consequences
210
00:09:16,645 --> 00:09:18,780
of actions.
211
00:09:26,255 --> 00:09:27,689
Who's that?
212
00:09:27,756 --> 00:09:29,624
So I think all we need
is a resume,
213
00:09:29,692 --> 00:09:31,726
and we'll be good, right?
214
00:09:31,794 --> 00:09:34,062
I-I just thought
you knew me.
215
00:09:34,129 --> 00:09:35,196
Yeah, it's no big deal.
216
00:09:35,264 --> 00:09:37,632
Just something
that looks like that.
217
00:09:37,700 --> 00:09:38,833
Cool.
218
00:09:38,901 --> 00:09:40,835
Let me...
219
00:09:42,738 --> 00:09:44,505
Cool.
220
00:09:51,914 --> 00:09:53,981
Did, uh, you just interview?
221
00:09:54,049 --> 00:09:55,750
Oh. Unfortunately, yes.
222
00:09:59,321 --> 00:10:00,722
W-what do you mean?
223
00:10:00,789 --> 00:10:03,191
That business
can't attract anyone.
224
00:10:03,258 --> 00:10:05,526
It's awful up there.
225
00:10:05,594 --> 00:10:08,629
Those people seem like
they're in prison
226
00:10:08,697 --> 00:10:09,997
waiting out life sentences
227
00:10:10,065 --> 00:10:12,834
in a...
Dying industry.
228
00:10:12,901 --> 00:10:15,670
Place must be horrible.
229
00:10:18,574 --> 00:10:20,775
I don't know
if I want this job.
230
00:10:20,843 --> 00:10:22,009
Well, if I get this job offer,
231
00:10:22,077 --> 00:10:23,745
then I know
that I'm gonna take it.
232
00:10:23,812 --> 00:10:26,347
And if I take it, I know
that I'm never gonna quit.
233
00:10:26,415 --> 00:10:32,587
And then 25 years
are gonna go by, and...
234
00:10:32,654 --> 00:10:34,555
I'm gonna die here.
235
00:10:34,623 --> 00:10:36,424
What makes you feel qualified
to judge a place
236
00:10:36,492 --> 00:10:38,459
after a mere interview?
237
00:10:46,235 --> 00:10:49,437
What are you doing?
238
00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:53,741
Stop trying to figure me out.
239
00:10:53,809 --> 00:10:55,476
- I just did.
- You can't.
240
00:10:55,544 --> 00:10:57,445
- It's done.
- No, it's not.
241
00:10:57,513 --> 00:10:58,980
I know you now.
I know your nature.
242
00:10:59,047 --> 00:11:01,215
You don't know me-- You don't
know anything about me.
243
00:11:01,283 --> 00:11:02,550
- I'm done.
- Get out of my head.
244
00:11:02,618 --> 00:11:04,619
- Not worth continuing.
- Stop trying to figure me out.
245
00:11:07,856 --> 00:11:10,625
Do you even know
anything about paper?
246
00:11:10,692 --> 00:11:12,093
How it's made?
247
00:11:12,161 --> 00:11:13,995
I saw an episode
on how they make paper
248
00:11:14,062 --> 00:11:15,630
on sesame street.
249
00:11:18,333 --> 00:11:19,734
Get out.
250
00:11:19,802 --> 00:11:20,968
I'm gonna prevent inferior men
251
00:11:21,036 --> 00:11:22,470
from sullying my place of work
252
00:11:22,538 --> 00:11:24,806
with their weak,
passionless leadership.
253
00:11:24,873 --> 00:11:27,408
Do you see my hat?
No?
254
00:11:27,476 --> 00:11:30,144
That's because I just
threw it in the ring.
255
00:11:30,212 --> 00:11:32,814
You guys pay for relocation,
though, right?
256
00:11:32,881 --> 00:11:34,816
Well, why would you need
relocation
257
00:11:34,883 --> 00:11:36,117
if you already live
in Scranton?
258
00:11:36,185 --> 00:11:38,753
Well, I'd wanna move
further away, you know?
259
00:11:38,821 --> 00:11:40,087
Just...Don't want any chance
260
00:11:40,155 --> 00:11:42,423
of running into my coworkers
outside the office.
261
00:11:44,159 --> 00:11:46,994
Can I ask why
you're leaving your current job?
262
00:11:50,165 --> 00:11:52,033
I'm leaving my other job
263
00:11:52,100 --> 00:11:54,368
because they were all...
Jerks.
264
00:11:54,436 --> 00:11:56,204
Really.
You know, all of them.
265
00:11:56,271 --> 00:11:58,840
You had your jerk wads
and your jerk offs, so...
266
00:11:58,907 --> 00:12:01,142
Just between the wads
and the offs,
267
00:12:01,210 --> 00:12:02,877
I just--
I had to get outta there.
268
00:12:02,945 --> 00:12:04,812
Is this a bad time
to be doing this?
269
00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:07,782
I'm having a bad time.
270
00:12:07,850 --> 00:12:09,217
I'm sorry.
271
00:12:09,284 --> 00:12:11,652
I-if we did something
to upset you,
272
00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:13,488
I-I'm sure it was
inadvertent.
273
00:12:19,528 --> 00:12:21,162
Wait.
274
00:12:21,230 --> 00:12:24,799
Oh, why did I believe
that weirdo in the lobby?
275
00:12:24,867 --> 00:12:27,735
These are the nicest people
I ever met.
276
00:12:29,204 --> 00:12:30,805
Thank you.
277
00:12:32,741 --> 00:12:34,308
It's gorgeous, Angela.
278
00:12:34,376 --> 00:12:35,910
Yeah, I actually know
about nice rings,
279
00:12:35,978 --> 00:12:37,478
and it is gorgeous.
Oh...Wow.
280
00:12:37,546 --> 00:12:39,480
It's a little flashy.
I mean, what am I...
281
00:12:39,548 --> 00:12:41,215
Naomi judd?
282
00:12:41,283 --> 00:12:44,151
- Tell us the freaking story!
- Yeah, tell us the story.
283
00:12:44,219 --> 00:12:46,420
Okay.
He took me to the replica
284
00:12:46,488 --> 00:12:48,289
of Monet's Japanese bridge.
285
00:12:48,357 --> 00:12:50,224
And then he put this flower
behind my ear,
286
00:12:50,292 --> 00:12:51,692
which normally I would hate,
287
00:12:51,760 --> 00:12:53,094
'cause it's so civil rightsy.
288
00:12:53,161 --> 00:12:55,730
Then he got down
on one knee and he said,
289
00:12:55,797 --> 00:12:58,566
"will you be
a senator's wife?"
290
00:12:58,634 --> 00:13:01,769
Oh! He talked about himself
in the third person?
291
00:13:01,837 --> 00:13:03,170
Yes, Pam.
292
00:13:03,238 --> 00:13:05,907
Not everyone is as informal
as you and Jim.
293
00:13:05,974 --> 00:13:08,175
"Oh, hey, Pam, dude, whatever.
294
00:13:08,243 --> 00:13:09,377
Wanna marry me?"
295
00:13:09,444 --> 00:13:12,046
That's not accurate.
296
00:13:12,114 --> 00:13:14,415
Then I saw flashes.
Reporters were there.
297
00:13:14,483 --> 00:13:17,952
They always find us.
And everyone was crying.
298
00:13:18,020 --> 00:13:20,187
Even his aide.
299
00:13:20,255 --> 00:13:22,924
Angela's engaged to a gay man.
300
00:13:22,991 --> 00:13:25,426
As a gay man, I'm horrified.
301
00:13:25,494 --> 00:13:28,062
As a friend of Angela's,
horrified.
302
00:13:28,130 --> 00:13:29,730
As a lover of elegant weddings,
303
00:13:29,798 --> 00:13:31,933
I'm a little excited.
304
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:35,069
But overall, horrified.
305
00:13:35,137 --> 00:13:36,237
Andy?
306
00:13:36,305 --> 00:13:38,739
You all set?
307
00:13:40,008 --> 00:13:41,542
Okay, guys.
It's time.
308
00:13:41,610 --> 00:13:44,946
It's pep talk time.
Tell me what I need to hear.
309
00:13:45,013 --> 00:13:47,214
Are you sure
this is a good idea?
310
00:13:47,282 --> 00:13:49,383
I hate to see you disappointed.
311
00:13:50,619 --> 00:13:52,119
I think Andy
should be the boss.
312
00:13:52,187 --> 00:13:53,955
He's just so great.
313
00:13:54,022 --> 00:13:57,325
If I'm being objective,
then Darryl, of course.
314
00:13:57,392 --> 00:13:59,026
So Andy,
what improvements would you make
315
00:13:59,094 --> 00:14:00,995
as office manager?
For starters, I really think
316
00:14:01,063 --> 00:14:02,830
we can streamline communication
around here.
317
00:14:02,898 --> 00:14:04,465
Whoa. That's
a very heavy accusation
318
00:14:04,533 --> 00:14:07,234
to level against Toby.
319
00:14:07,302 --> 00:14:09,737
- I wasn't a-accusing--
- Well, Toby's in charge
320
00:14:09,805 --> 00:14:10,805
of human resources.
321
00:14:10,872 --> 00:14:12,406
That would include
communication.
322
00:14:12,474 --> 00:14:14,275
I think that Toby's
done a fine job.
323
00:14:14,343 --> 00:14:18,179
Right. I-I-I really wasn't
trying to insult a-anyone.
324
00:14:18,246 --> 00:14:20,481
I didn't think you were.
325
00:14:20,549 --> 00:14:22,249
I have two relationships
with Andy.
326
00:14:22,317 --> 00:14:23,884
I have a personal relationship,
327
00:14:23,952 --> 00:14:25,853
and I have a professional
relationship.
328
00:14:25,921 --> 00:14:27,788
Personally, yeah,
I think he's a rat
329
00:14:27,856 --> 00:14:29,123
and I think he's responsible
330
00:14:29,191 --> 00:14:31,592
for the demise of my
relationship with Erin.
331
00:14:31,660 --> 00:14:34,195
Professionally...
332
00:14:34,262 --> 00:14:36,197
He broke up the happiest
couple in this office.
333
00:14:36,264 --> 00:14:37,898
How many windows are there
in New York City?
334
00:14:37,966 --> 00:14:39,867
- What?
- Critical thinking.
335
00:14:39,935 --> 00:14:42,403
Common on-the-spot question
asked in an interview.
336
00:14:42,471 --> 00:14:45,306
Okay. Uh...Let me think.
Are you counting car windows?
337
00:14:45,374 --> 00:14:47,408
No. How far away
is the sun?
338
00:14:47,476 --> 00:14:49,844
Uh, 93 million Miles.
339
00:14:49,911 --> 00:14:52,813
- Is it?
- Yeah.
340
00:14:52,881 --> 00:14:55,049
And the diameter of the sun
is 870,000 miles,
341
00:14:55,117 --> 00:14:57,385
which makes it 109 times
wider than the earth
342
00:14:57,452 --> 00:15:00,321
and 333,000 times
heavier than the earth.
343
00:15:00,389 --> 00:15:01,856
Shut up about the sun.
344
00:15:01,923 --> 00:15:04,892
Shut up about the sun!
345
00:15:09,264 --> 00:15:11,732
I am unhappy with the confusing
346
00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:15,403
and, at times, confrontational
nature of that meeting.
347
00:15:15,470 --> 00:15:17,304
I wanted it to go better.
348
00:15:17,372 --> 00:15:19,707
I wanted it to go better!
349
00:15:21,410 --> 00:15:22,677
Yes, there used to be
a paper clip
350
00:15:22,744 --> 00:15:24,011
that would pop up and say,
351
00:15:24,079 --> 00:15:26,480
"looks like you are writing
a letter or resume.
352
00:15:26,548 --> 00:15:28,449
Would you like help?"
353
00:15:28,517 --> 00:15:31,052
I believe his name was...
Clippy.
354
00:15:32,254 --> 00:15:34,488
First of all, I wanna thank you
355
00:15:34,556 --> 00:15:36,891
for your years
of patronizing our company.
356
00:15:36,958 --> 00:15:39,660
I've got some bad news.
357
00:15:39,728 --> 00:15:41,062
We're going out of business.
358
00:15:41,129 --> 00:15:43,230
Saving face.
359
00:15:43,298 --> 00:15:44,398
Yep, yep.
360
00:15:44,466 --> 00:15:46,567
I understand that.
361
00:15:46,635 --> 00:15:48,569
Basically everything's
falling apart here.
362
00:15:48,637 --> 00:15:51,038
How is this on me?
363
00:15:51,106 --> 00:15:53,374
Hang up.
364
00:15:53,442 --> 00:15:55,443
Corporate needs you
to find the differences
365
00:15:55,510 --> 00:15:59,213
between this picture
and this picture.
366
00:15:59,281 --> 00:16:01,549
Intel has told us
there are at least seven.
367
00:16:01,616 --> 00:16:03,517
Okay. I already see one.
Gimme.
368
00:16:03,585 --> 00:16:04,819
Okay.
369
00:16:06,254 --> 00:16:08,889
They're the same picture.
370
00:16:08,957 --> 00:16:10,624
Well, I manage my department,
371
00:16:10,692 --> 00:16:13,060
and I've been doing that
for several years now.
372
00:16:13,128 --> 00:16:16,363
And, God, I've learned a lot
of life lessons along the way.
373
00:16:16,431 --> 00:16:18,399
Your department's
just you, right?
374
00:16:18,467 --> 00:16:21,001
Yes, Jim, but I am not
easy to manage.
375
00:16:21,069 --> 00:16:24,171
Great.
Um, can we just...
376
00:16:24,239 --> 00:16:26,073
- What was that?
- We just have
377
00:16:26,141 --> 00:16:29,944
a lot of serious candidates
to get through today, so...
378
00:16:30,011 --> 00:16:32,046
Am I not a serious candidate?
379
00:16:32,114 --> 00:16:34,782
What do you want me to say?
380
00:16:34,850 --> 00:16:37,084
I mean, there's a line
of qualified people out there.
381
00:16:37,152 --> 00:16:39,086
We have a video CV
from England.
382
00:16:39,154 --> 00:16:40,721
Are we all just gonna
pretend to--
383
00:16:40,789 --> 00:16:43,257
okay. Um...
384
00:16:43,325 --> 00:16:45,025
What are your weaknesses?
385
00:16:45,093 --> 00:16:46,861
I don't have any, asshole.
386
00:16:49,831 --> 00:16:51,766
I want an interview.
387
00:16:53,201 --> 00:16:54,568
How's the family?
Good.
388
00:16:54,636 --> 00:16:57,238
- Good? Are they good?
- Yeah.
389
00:16:57,305 --> 00:16:58,873
What's your daughter's
name again?
390
00:16:58,940 --> 00:16:59,974
Peepee?
391
00:17:00,041 --> 00:17:01,942
- Peepa.
- Peepa. How is she?
392
00:17:02,010 --> 00:17:03,878
- Great.
- Great!
393
00:17:03,945 --> 00:17:06,213
Oh, that's great.
394
00:17:06,281 --> 00:17:08,482
We never were very good
at smalltalk, were we, Jim?
395
00:17:08,550 --> 00:17:09,717
- No.
- Now, listen--
396
00:17:09,785 --> 00:17:12,052
You're not getting
an interview, Dwight.
397
00:17:12,120 --> 00:17:14,321
The whole point
of this search committee process
398
00:17:14,389 --> 00:17:16,490
is to prevent hiring
someone like you ever again.
399
00:17:16,558 --> 00:17:17,792
Okay. I know why
you're saying that, Jim.
400
00:17:17,859 --> 00:17:20,060
I really do.
But think of it this way.
401
00:17:20,128 --> 00:17:22,062
The hand that reaches
from the grave
402
00:17:22,130 --> 00:17:23,731
to grip your throat
403
00:17:23,799 --> 00:17:25,566
is the strong hand
you want on the wheel.
404
00:17:25,634 --> 00:17:27,568
- Okay. That's vivid.
- Now, I'm gonna make you
405
00:17:27,636 --> 00:17:28,969
an offer, okay?
406
00:17:29,037 --> 00:17:32,306
You even do so little
as grant me an interview,
407
00:17:32,374 --> 00:17:34,909
I will guarantee you
your dream work life, okay?
408
00:17:34,976 --> 00:17:37,444
You roll in at 10:00 AM
409
00:17:37,512 --> 00:17:39,847
to your own private
reserved parking spot,
410
00:17:39,915 --> 00:17:42,783
pick up your daily free coffee
from Dwight's caffeine corner,
411
00:17:42,851 --> 00:17:45,419
unlimited sex breaks
for you and Pam.
412
00:17:45,487 --> 00:17:46,821
- Yikes.
- Erin will eat garbage
413
00:17:46,888 --> 00:17:48,255
for your entertainment.
414
00:17:48,323 --> 00:17:50,491
Wow. You know how I like
taking bribes.
415
00:17:50,559 --> 00:17:52,026
- Ha ha!
- But unfortunately,
416
00:17:52,093 --> 00:17:53,594
jo also took the job
away from you
417
00:17:53,662 --> 00:17:55,362
because she doesn't
trust your judgment.
418
00:17:55,430 --> 00:17:56,964
So how would that look for me
419
00:17:57,032 --> 00:17:58,866
if I recommended you?
420
00:17:58,934 --> 00:18:00,167
Fine.
421
00:18:00,235 --> 00:18:03,270
I'll do it without you.
You'll regret this.
422
00:18:03,338 --> 00:18:04,371
Okay.
423
00:18:05,540 --> 00:18:07,541
Let me get that for you.
424
00:18:07,609 --> 00:18:09,543
- Thank you.
- Okay.
425
00:18:15,021 --> 00:18:17,322
Pam, I think Robert is gay.
426
00:18:17,390 --> 00:18:19,924
The senator?
427
00:18:19,992 --> 00:18:22,227
He was married before,
and he has a kid.
428
00:18:22,295 --> 00:18:23,461
- So--
- And don't say that thing
429
00:18:23,529 --> 00:18:26,498
about how lots of gay guys
have kids.
430
00:18:26,565 --> 00:18:29,434
I have a very strong suspicion.
431
00:18:29,502 --> 00:18:31,269
Did you see him at a bathhouse?
432
00:18:31,337 --> 00:18:32,937
What bathhouse?
433
00:18:33,005 --> 00:18:35,140
The windowless building
by the Baskin Robbins.
434
00:18:35,207 --> 00:18:37,075
What?
435
00:18:37,143 --> 00:18:39,277
Forget it. I'm never
gonna know what goes on there.
436
00:18:39,345 --> 00:18:40,945
My friend at the Scranton blade
437
00:18:41,013 --> 00:18:42,414
is totally plugged into
these matters.
438
00:18:42,481 --> 00:18:44,282
You're in the gay mafia.
439
00:18:44,350 --> 00:18:45,784
You're thinking of
another group--
440
00:18:45,851 --> 00:18:48,787
Much wealthier, much older.
You sound ignorant.
441
00:18:48,854 --> 00:18:52,023
You guys, um...
Talking senator?
442
00:18:52,091 --> 00:18:54,259
- No.
- No.
443
00:18:54,327 --> 00:18:55,960
Why would we be talking
about the senator?
444
00:18:56,028 --> 00:18:57,729
'Cause he's totally gay.
445
00:18:58,898 --> 00:19:00,632
How do I know
that Robert is gay?
446
00:19:00,700 --> 00:19:03,401
He "liked" my Facebook photos
447
00:19:03,469 --> 00:19:05,370
at 3:00 in the morning.
448
00:19:05,438 --> 00:19:08,340
Name-- David Brent.
Occupation-- Inspirer.
449
00:19:08,407 --> 00:19:10,675
Status-- None of your business.
450
00:19:10,743 --> 00:19:12,010
Young, free,
and single, though.
451
00:19:12,078 --> 00:19:13,311
Thanks for asking.
452
00:19:13,379 --> 00:19:15,480
Hey, you're looking
for a new boss, yeah?
453
00:19:15,548 --> 00:19:17,649
Someone to tell
a bunch of discontented,
454
00:19:17,717 --> 00:19:19,951
under-encouraged drones
what to do every day.
455
00:19:20,019 --> 00:19:22,787
Is that it? Oh.
Our out-of-touch powers that be.
456
00:19:22,855 --> 00:19:25,590
Want me to fire them?
They don't see things your way?
457
00:19:25,658 --> 00:19:27,625
Then I am that dude.
Bye-bye, baby, bye-bye.
458
00:19:27,693 --> 00:19:29,561
Get some other corporate suit
to lay down the law.
459
00:19:29,628 --> 00:19:31,363
What?
You've changed your mind?
460
00:19:31,430 --> 00:19:33,398
You're now looking for
a leader of men?
461
00:19:33,466 --> 00:19:36,034
Ipso facto...Women too.
462
00:19:36,102 --> 00:19:37,836
When do I start?
463
00:19:39,538 --> 00:19:42,574
Do you know what it took
to get Bob to notice me?
464
00:19:42,641 --> 00:19:44,476
I waited in his office
every morning
465
00:19:44,543 --> 00:19:46,511
wearing nothing but
kitty cat ears.
466
00:19:46,579 --> 00:19:48,646
I did that every day
for two weeks.
467
00:19:48,714 --> 00:19:50,014
And on the tenth day,
he walked in.
468
00:19:50,082 --> 00:19:52,317
He was naked too,
except a dog nose.
469
00:19:52,385 --> 00:19:55,186
- Guess what we did then?
- I don't think I can do that--
470
00:19:55,254 --> 00:19:56,721
- Bestiality.
- Yeah.
471
00:19:56,789 --> 00:19:58,423
That's not my personality.
472
00:19:58,491 --> 00:20:01,559
If my daughter
were asking me...
473
00:20:01,627 --> 00:20:02,594
Yes?
474
00:20:03,996 --> 00:20:05,764
I would say
if you want someone--
475
00:20:05,831 --> 00:20:09,167
If you really want them--
476
00:20:09,235 --> 00:20:11,503
Go get them.
477
00:20:11,570 --> 00:20:15,507
I do really want him.
478
00:20:15,574 --> 00:20:17,876
So, uh...
Here you go.
479
00:20:17,943 --> 00:20:19,911
- Great.
- Hope it's all right.
480
00:20:19,979 --> 00:20:22,080
I'm sure it's fine.
481
00:20:22,148 --> 00:20:23,415
The guy who was
in here earlier,
482
00:20:23,482 --> 00:20:25,350
interviewed after me...
How'd he do?
483
00:20:25,418 --> 00:20:26,684
Howard cline?
484
00:20:26,752 --> 00:20:28,386
That's not
who I'm talking about.
485
00:20:28,454 --> 00:20:31,189
Oh. Deshaun Williams.
486
00:20:31,257 --> 00:20:32,724
Yes. How did he do?
487
00:20:32,792 --> 00:20:35,293
He's an amazing man.
He's a rhodes scholar.
488
00:20:35,361 --> 00:20:37,862
He invented an app
that invents apps.
489
00:20:37,930 --> 00:20:38,897
Fantastic kisser.
490
00:20:38,964 --> 00:20:40,965
Common, man.
I'm being serious.
491
00:20:41,033 --> 00:20:43,268
It's no joke.
Darryl, we all know you.
492
00:20:43,335 --> 00:20:46,604
Your interview is not nearly
as important as the other guy's.
493
00:20:48,073 --> 00:20:49,574
First I'll take down
494
00:20:49,642 --> 00:20:51,943
- the cubicle walls.
- But there aren't--
495
00:20:52,011 --> 00:20:53,411
Symbol of transparency.
496
00:20:53,479 --> 00:20:55,780
There'd be no titles.
497
00:20:55,848 --> 00:20:58,116
Everyone has the same job.
498
00:20:58,184 --> 00:20:59,918
Same goes for me.
499
00:20:59,985 --> 00:21:03,421
I'd take your job,
but I'd reject the title.
500
00:21:03,489 --> 00:21:04,556
A little unspecific.
501
00:21:04,623 --> 00:21:06,424
Everyone would be known
502
00:21:06,492 --> 00:21:08,426
for their accomplishments.
503
00:21:08,494 --> 00:21:10,428
That's very interesting.
504
00:21:10,496 --> 00:21:12,530
Um...I feel like
there might be a conflict there,
505
00:21:12,598 --> 00:21:15,633
and if a conflict did arise,
how would that be dealt with?
506
00:21:15,701 --> 00:21:18,803
Oh!
Yeah.
507
00:21:19,905 --> 00:21:21,272
Scratch everything from before.
508
00:21:21,340 --> 00:21:23,308
I tell you what I'd do.
Go the other way.
509
00:21:23,375 --> 00:21:25,643
More cubicles.
510
00:21:25,711 --> 00:21:27,245
More division.
511
00:21:27,313 --> 00:21:31,149
Everyone is somebody's boss,
512
00:21:31,217 --> 00:21:34,819
and that person can fire
the person below them.
513
00:21:36,555 --> 00:21:39,257
And once a month
the lowest-performing person--
514
00:21:40,860 --> 00:21:42,227
Bye-bye.
515
00:21:42,294 --> 00:21:44,896
How would you compare
like an accountant and HR?
516
00:21:44,964 --> 00:21:47,632
Well, I'll tell you how,
shall I?
517
00:21:47,700 --> 00:21:48,800
I'll tell you how.
Okay.
518
00:21:48,868 --> 00:21:51,436
By splitting the difference.
519
00:21:51,504 --> 00:21:54,439
Just--just somewhere
in the middle.
520
00:21:54,507 --> 00:21:55,874
I think that's probably all...
521
00:21:55,941 --> 00:21:56,941
We need to hear from--
522
00:21:57,009 --> 00:21:58,409
Zen office.
523
00:22:00,012 --> 00:22:01,913
Thought of that?
That's what I'd do.
524
00:22:01,981 --> 00:22:05,884
Everyone takes their shoes off
before they come in, okay?
525
00:22:05,951 --> 00:22:09,053
There'd be no desks.
You just sit on the floor.
526
00:22:09,121 --> 00:22:11,923
- That's very--
- You've got a thai woman
527
00:22:11,991 --> 00:22:14,392
out in the back--
Sockee.
528
00:22:14,460 --> 00:22:16,060
- Okay.
- Sockee.
529
00:22:16,128 --> 00:22:18,930
- That's not--
- Sockee is her name, okay?
530
00:22:18,998 --> 00:22:22,433
She's administering massage,
all right, if you need it.
531
00:22:22,501 --> 00:22:24,102
If you don't, whatever.
Just talk to her.
532
00:22:24,169 --> 00:22:25,737
She's a person.
533
00:22:25,804 --> 00:22:27,772
Either way, 50 minutes of that,
534
00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:29,507
and you...
535
00:22:29,575 --> 00:22:32,243
You are cracking to go.
536
00:22:35,147 --> 00:22:36,781
- Is there a frontrunner?
- You know what?
537
00:22:36,849 --> 00:22:39,050
They all just sort of blend
together after a while.
538
00:22:39,118 --> 00:22:40,785
Well, there must be
someone who stands out.
539
00:22:40,853 --> 00:22:42,053
No, not at all.
540
00:22:42,121 --> 00:22:43,755
In fact, I'm not even
taking it seriously.
541
00:22:43,822 --> 00:22:45,056
I think at the end of the day,
542
00:22:45,124 --> 00:22:47,458
I'm just gonna pick
a name out of the hat.
543
00:22:47,526 --> 00:22:49,193
The hell you will!
544
00:22:49,261 --> 00:22:51,663
I worked for the last boss
for 15 years.
545
00:22:51,730 --> 00:22:54,299
According to my doctor,
I don't have another 15 years
546
00:22:54,366 --> 00:22:57,068
if I wanna keep up the same
dietary and sexual lifestyle,
547
00:22:57,136 --> 00:22:58,736
which I intend to.
548
00:22:58,804 --> 00:23:01,506
Oh, no, Stanley.
You'll live forever.
549
00:23:01,574 --> 00:23:03,074
My next boss
will be my last boss.
550
00:23:03,142 --> 00:23:04,776
He'll be at my funeral.
551
00:23:04,843 --> 00:23:08,279
So I would appreciate it if
you would take this seriously.
552
00:23:09,982 --> 00:23:11,416
You pick a crappy boss,
553
00:23:11,483 --> 00:23:13,418
you're responsible
for my crappy life.
554
00:23:13,485 --> 00:23:15,687
Okay, everybody.
I was just making a joke.
555
00:23:15,754 --> 00:23:17,555
I am taking it seriously.
I promise.
556
00:23:17,623 --> 00:23:20,358
Are you?
557
00:23:20,426 --> 00:23:21,693
Little advice?
558
00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:24,228
Take a day off
from the whole Jim shtick.
559
00:23:24,296 --> 00:23:26,431
Try caring about something.
560
00:23:26,498 --> 00:23:30,101
You might like how it feels,
James.
561
00:23:38,696 --> 00:23:40,697
Hey, honey. Oh, lord.
Take all this.
562
00:23:40,764 --> 00:23:43,299
- All right.
- Here.
563
00:23:43,367 --> 00:23:45,468
- Oh.
- Jim.
564
00:23:45,536 --> 00:23:47,237
Did you hear stern
this morning?
565
00:23:47,304 --> 00:23:49,239
- No. Was he good?
- Ah...Robin was good.
566
00:23:49,306 --> 00:23:51,140
She's always good.
Keeps him on his toes.
567
00:23:51,208 --> 00:23:53,276
It's Howard's show, though.
568
00:23:53,344 --> 00:23:54,944
Whose is this?
569
00:23:55,012 --> 00:23:56,379
Darryl Philbin.
570
00:23:56,447 --> 00:23:59,582
Oh. Very nice to see
a familiar face on top.
571
00:23:59,650 --> 00:24:03,219
Ah, a little long, aren't we?
Four pages?
572
00:24:03,287 --> 00:24:04,754
Is this the same Darryl Philbin
573
00:24:04,822 --> 00:24:07,657
who's had two jobs in ten years
at one company?
574
00:24:07,725 --> 00:24:11,227
Yes, thanks to you
who promoted me
575
00:24:11,295 --> 00:24:13,796
after we, uh...lnterfaced.
576
00:24:13,864 --> 00:24:16,165
"Coordinated and implemented
receipt, storage,
577
00:24:16,233 --> 00:24:20,670
and delivery of over
2.5 billion units of inventory."
578
00:24:20,738 --> 00:24:22,472
2.5 billion, Darryl?
579
00:24:22,539 --> 00:24:24,841
2.5 billion units of what?
580
00:24:24,909 --> 00:24:27,610
Paper material, ma'am.
581
00:24:27,678 --> 00:24:29,112
Paper material?
582
00:24:29,179 --> 00:24:31,614
Pieces of paper.
583
00:24:31,682 --> 00:24:34,417
Jo. May I speak
to you for a second?
584
00:24:34,485 --> 00:24:36,119
Or what?
You gonna shoot me?
585
00:24:36,186 --> 00:24:38,621
Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha...
586
00:24:38,689 --> 00:24:40,690
Oh, I enjoy laughing
at my mistakes.
587
00:24:40,758 --> 00:24:43,559
Because I've learned
so much from them.
588
00:24:43,627 --> 00:24:45,495
I'd like to be interviewed
for the position.
589
00:24:45,562 --> 00:24:46,930
I'll interview you right now.
590
00:24:46,997 --> 00:24:48,765
- Okay.
- Question one.
591
00:24:48,832 --> 00:24:51,134
Ever shot a gun in the office?
592
00:24:51,201 --> 00:24:52,435
It's complicated...
593
00:24:52,503 --> 00:24:55,004
Yeah, but see...lt's not.
594
00:24:56,240 --> 00:24:57,707
I don't think
we should tell her.
595
00:24:57,775 --> 00:24:59,175
Angela went a whole day
without telling me
596
00:24:59,243 --> 00:25:00,977
I had lettuce in my teeth.
Screw her.
597
00:25:01,045 --> 00:25:02,645
I'm a woman.
I would want to know.
598
00:25:02,713 --> 00:25:04,180
Yeah. You gotta know.
599
00:25:04,248 --> 00:25:08,117
Okay. But if Angela
can get a gay man to marry her,
600
00:25:08,185 --> 00:25:11,187
maybe I could get
a lesbian to marry me. Huh?
601
00:25:11,255 --> 00:25:13,323
Huh? Huh?
That's hot.
602
00:25:13,390 --> 00:25:15,525
You have met a lesbian
in real life, right?
603
00:25:15,592 --> 00:25:20,530
You know, this probably is
her last chance at a family.
604
00:25:20,597 --> 00:25:22,532
She does seem happy.
605
00:25:22,599 --> 00:25:24,534
You're right.
You're right.
606
00:25:24,601 --> 00:25:26,536
She seems happy.
We don't tell her.
607
00:25:26,603 --> 00:25:28,237
- We don't tell her.
- Okay.
608
00:25:28,305 --> 00:25:30,173
Excuse me, Ms. Bennett,
may I have a word?
609
00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:31,240
Okay.
610
00:25:31,308 --> 00:25:32,642
Uh...Can it be in private?
611
00:25:32,710 --> 00:25:34,477
Don't worry.
It's not about you.
612
00:25:38,415 --> 00:25:39,882
As minority executive,
613
00:25:39,950 --> 00:25:41,451
I think it's my responsibility
to let you know
614
00:25:41,518 --> 00:25:42,652
that Gabe is gross.
615
00:25:42,720 --> 00:25:43,886
I don't think it's professional
616
00:25:43,954 --> 00:25:45,722
that he was sleeping
with the receptionist,
617
00:25:45,789 --> 00:25:47,724
and then when Erin dumped him
so that she could be with Andy,
618
00:25:47,791 --> 00:25:50,660
he became a total
crazy stalker psycho.
619
00:25:50,728 --> 00:25:52,195
Welcome to Scranton, Jo,
620
00:25:52,262 --> 00:25:54,564
land of a thousand problems
only you can fix.
621
00:25:57,101 --> 00:25:59,902
Oh, for God's sake.
622
00:26:02,072 --> 00:26:05,408
He's texting me his resume
one line at a time.
623
00:26:06,777 --> 00:26:10,079
These are costing me
10? apiece, you jackass.
624
00:26:10,147 --> 00:26:11,581
I'm roaming!
625
00:26:14,118 --> 00:26:15,918
Get me our biggest client
on the phone
626
00:26:15,986 --> 00:26:17,520
right this instant.
627
00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:23,926
Who is our biggest client?
628
00:26:23,994 --> 00:26:25,228
Uh, just put him through to me.
629
00:26:25,295 --> 00:26:27,597
Okay.
630
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:31,768
Hello, this is...
The client.
631
00:26:31,835 --> 00:26:33,002
It's Creed.
632
00:26:33,070 --> 00:26:36,939
Fyi. I'm starting
my own paper company.
633
00:26:37,007 --> 00:26:39,642
Looking to poach some chumps.
You in?
634
00:26:39,710 --> 00:26:42,145
- Yes.
- Cool!
635
00:26:42,212 --> 00:26:44,280
Let's keep this on the qt,
okay?
636
00:26:44,348 --> 00:26:47,150
I, uh, don't want you
to be a dead mammajamma.
637
00:26:47,217 --> 00:26:48,384
- Great.
- All right, thank you.
638
00:26:48,452 --> 00:26:50,319
- Thank you.
Bye-bye.
639
00:26:51,655 --> 00:26:53,122
Jo, you have one more
candidate.
640
00:26:53,190 --> 00:26:54,424
He's a burn victim.
641
00:26:55,492 --> 00:26:57,060
He's all messed up.
642
00:26:57,127 --> 00:26:59,629
I can tell him
to get lost if you want.
643
00:26:59,696 --> 00:27:01,798
No. Send him in.
644
00:27:01,865 --> 00:27:03,099
Who is this?
645
00:27:04,835 --> 00:27:07,170
- I have no idea.
- Oh, I know this guy.
646
00:27:16,013 --> 00:27:18,581
Hello, Mr. Souvenier.
647
00:27:18,649 --> 00:27:20,650
Mr. Jacques Souvenier?
648
00:27:20,717 --> 00:27:22,418
Nice to meet you.
It says here you're French?
649
00:27:22,486 --> 00:27:24,754
So you worked
at your last job for 15 years
650
00:27:24,822 --> 00:27:26,622
as assistant
to the regional manager.
651
00:27:26,690 --> 00:27:27,890
Assistant regional manager.
652
00:27:27,958 --> 00:27:29,158
Assistant
to the regional manager.
653
00:27:29,226 --> 00:27:32,095
- Assistant regional manager.
- What is it?
654
00:27:32,162 --> 00:27:33,463
Assistant regional manager.
655
00:27:33,530 --> 00:27:34,797
Oh. That's my mistake.
Sorry about that.
656
00:27:34,865 --> 00:27:36,032
The last paper company
you worked for
657
00:27:36,100 --> 00:27:37,500
burned to the ground?
658
00:27:37,568 --> 00:27:39,368
"All because they wouldn't
hire a manager
659
00:27:39,436 --> 00:27:40,636
who lived and breathed paper."
660
00:27:40,704 --> 00:27:42,138
That's a travesty.
661
00:27:42,206 --> 00:27:44,507
I wanna talk to Dwight Schrute
for a second.
662
00:27:44,575 --> 00:27:46,142
I wanna ask him a question.
663
00:27:46,210 --> 00:27:47,310
Get Dwight.
664
00:27:47,377 --> 00:27:49,278
If he isn't here
in 60 seconds...
665
00:27:51,181 --> 00:27:53,149
Wait, wait!
No. Stop, stop.
666
00:27:53,217 --> 00:27:55,451
Jo...
667
00:27:55,519 --> 00:27:57,620
It's me.
I'm Dwight.
668
00:27:58,889 --> 00:28:00,389
No.
669
00:28:00,457 --> 00:28:01,691
No. Wait. But--
670
00:28:01,758 --> 00:28:04,360
I mean, you're Dwight
and then...
671
00:28:04,428 --> 00:28:05,628
He's the--
672
00:28:05,696 --> 00:28:07,029
Yeah.
673
00:28:08,765 --> 00:28:11,367
Very unprofessional, Jacques.
674
00:28:11,435 --> 00:28:13,836
Or should I say Dwight?
675
00:28:13,904 --> 00:28:16,873
Let's just say I had
hired this Jack Souvenier.
676
00:28:16,940 --> 00:28:18,141
Then what?
677
00:28:18,208 --> 00:28:19,742
I would have dressed
this way every day,
678
00:28:19,810 --> 00:28:22,545
legally changed my name,
learned French sign language,
679
00:28:22,613 --> 00:28:25,081
shown up, and been the best
damn branch manager
680
00:28:25,149 --> 00:28:26,482
you'd ever seen.
681
00:28:26,550 --> 00:28:28,184
All that for this job.
682
00:28:28,252 --> 00:28:29,752
Yes.
683
00:28:31,054 --> 00:28:32,922
That's [Bleep] Crazy.
684
00:28:34,458 --> 00:28:35,625
Get outta here.
685
00:28:38,896 --> 00:28:41,397
What a nut job.
686
00:28:45,151 --> 00:28:46,451
This guy was good,
although he did keep saying
687
00:28:46,519 --> 00:28:48,420
that he needed two weeks off
right at the beginning
688
00:28:48,487 --> 00:28:49,788
for a trip to the Finger Lakes.
689
00:28:49,855 --> 00:28:51,589
Seriously, every five minutes
he was like,
690
00:28:51,657 --> 00:28:53,458
"hey, just making sure the
Finger Lakes thing is clear."
691
00:28:53,526 --> 00:28:55,460
Okay. It's fun to talk
about the rejects,
692
00:28:55,528 --> 00:28:57,262
but, uh...
Who's got ya excited?
693
00:28:57,329 --> 00:28:58,730
Finger Lakes guy is good.
694
00:28:58,798 --> 00:29:01,099
Darryl is also very good.
695
00:29:01,167 --> 00:29:04,502
Who's this fellow?
Went to Cornell.
696
00:29:04,570 --> 00:29:07,172
What's wrong with him?
How much time do you have?
697
00:29:07,239 --> 00:29:08,807
Sales ability--none.
698
00:29:08,874 --> 00:29:11,676
See sales ability.
699
00:29:11,744 --> 00:29:13,311
And that's your unbiased
opinion.
700
00:29:13,379 --> 00:29:14,846
- Yes, it is.
- So it's not relevant
701
00:29:14,914 --> 00:29:18,016
that he took the receptionist
away from ya.
702
00:29:18,084 --> 00:29:20,485
Aw, Jo.
Jo, I'm disappointed in you.
703
00:29:20,553 --> 00:29:23,254
Some people let personal
things into the work--
704
00:29:23,322 --> 00:29:25,223
is she with him?
Because I-I thought that--
705
00:29:25,291 --> 00:29:27,659
- Gabe!
Ohh!
706
00:29:27,726 --> 00:29:29,127
You got all close
to these people,
707
00:29:29,195 --> 00:29:31,429
got involved in their lives.
708
00:29:31,497 --> 00:29:32,664
Let's get ya back to Florida.
709
00:29:32,731 --> 00:29:34,632
We'll figure out
something for ya.
710
00:29:34,700 --> 00:29:36,067
That sounds like a promotion.
711
00:29:36,135 --> 00:29:38,002
It's not.
712
00:29:38,070 --> 00:29:39,737
Let's get Kelly in here
to take his place.
713
00:29:39,805 --> 00:29:41,306
Um...Why Kelly?
714
00:29:41,373 --> 00:29:43,475
'Cause Gabe's tall and weak.
She's short and strong.
715
00:29:43,542 --> 00:29:45,243
I'm doing an opposites thing.
716
00:29:45,311 --> 00:29:46,644
Okay.
717
00:29:46,712 --> 00:29:48,079
How'd my girl Nelly do?
718
00:29:48,147 --> 00:29:49,681
Oh. I didn't know
you knew her.
719
00:29:49,748 --> 00:29:51,816
- She didn't mention it?
- No.
720
00:29:51,884 --> 00:29:54,285
Integrity move.
I like it.
721
00:29:54,353 --> 00:29:56,187
Yeah, uh, she also
gave me reason to think
722
00:29:56,255 --> 00:29:58,189
that maybe she wasn't
a good fit.
723
00:29:58,257 --> 00:29:59,858
Well, I'm not saying
you must hire her.
724
00:29:59,925 --> 00:30:03,128
If you find someone
who's clearly a fit, then fine.
725
00:30:03,195 --> 00:30:05,463
Just make sure
they fit real good.
726
00:30:05,531 --> 00:30:08,333
No more manager turnover.
Don't mess this up, Jim.
727
00:30:09,869 --> 00:30:11,469
And give Dwight an interview.
728
00:30:11,537 --> 00:30:13,972
I like a little bit of crazy.
729
00:30:16,942 --> 00:30:19,344
- Ah!
- Erin, what are you doing?
730
00:30:19,411 --> 00:30:21,479
I've been turned into a puppet.
731
00:30:21,547 --> 00:30:23,615
Okay.
732
00:30:23,682 --> 00:30:25,517
Look at the puppet.
Hi, puppet.
733
00:30:25,584 --> 00:30:26,951
Who are you?
734
00:30:27,019 --> 00:30:29,020
I went to drop off
the FedEx forms,
735
00:30:29,088 --> 00:30:33,324
and an evil witch named Angela
turned me into a puppet!
736
00:30:33,392 --> 00:30:35,193
Yeah.
737
00:30:35,261 --> 00:30:37,028
Low blow, puppet.
738
00:30:37,096 --> 00:30:39,397
And there's only one thing
that can change me back
739
00:30:39,465 --> 00:30:41,699
into a real girl.
740
00:30:43,202 --> 00:30:44,269
It's good.
741
00:30:44,336 --> 00:30:45,837
It's just that
I wish the puppet
742
00:30:45,905 --> 00:30:48,106
would talk more about
the alphabet.
743
00:30:48,174 --> 00:30:50,542
Not for me, but...
744
00:30:50,609 --> 00:30:52,544
If any kids are watching.
745
00:30:52,611 --> 00:30:56,481
A, b, and so forth.
746
00:30:56,549 --> 00:30:58,249
You know.
747
00:30:58,317 --> 00:31:02,387
M, N, L, O. P.
748
00:31:02,454 --> 00:31:05,657
F.
749
00:31:05,724 --> 00:31:08,726
I need the most
special thing in the office.
750
00:31:08,794 --> 00:31:10,061
Silence?
751
00:31:10,129 --> 00:31:13,231
A date with
the best salesman...
752
00:31:13,299 --> 00:31:15,200
Andy Bernard!
753
00:31:24,076 --> 00:31:27,212
Hey, Erin.
Oh.
754
00:31:27,279 --> 00:31:28,913
Where'd you learn
how to puppet like that?
755
00:31:28,981 --> 00:31:31,115
- I've done it all my life--
- Listen, I'm really flattered,
756
00:31:31,183 --> 00:31:33,051
but I don't think we should.
757
00:31:39,325 --> 00:31:41,359
Erin's my best friend
in this office,
758
00:31:41,427 --> 00:31:43,628
hands down.
759
00:31:43,696 --> 00:31:44,829
But...
760
00:31:44,897 --> 00:31:46,097
When she asked me out,
761
00:31:46,165 --> 00:31:48,433
I just didn't have
that feeling, you know?
762
00:31:48,500 --> 00:31:50,501
Aren't there some things
that you really want to like
763
00:31:50,569 --> 00:31:53,605
but you just can't
seem to like it?
764
00:31:53,672 --> 00:31:57,408
Like Mad Men or football.
765
00:31:57,476 --> 00:31:59,577
Let's not forget.
Erin chose Gabe over me.
766
00:31:59,645 --> 00:32:01,879
That happened.
767
00:32:01,947 --> 00:32:06,417
I'm not gonna apologize
for getting over her...Okay?
768
00:32:06,485 --> 00:32:08,353
I'm sorry.
769
00:32:08,420 --> 00:32:12,824
I would go for someone
who's more...
770
00:32:12,891 --> 00:32:15,760
She's great, though.
771
00:32:15,828 --> 00:32:17,862
Stanley,
I won't be able to invite
772
00:32:17,930 --> 00:32:19,530
everyone to the wedding,
773
00:32:19,598 --> 00:32:21,599
because we wanna keep it
to 350.
774
00:32:21,667 --> 00:32:23,401
- I'll get over it.
- I mean,
775
00:32:23,469 --> 00:32:25,069
we just have to see
how many senators
776
00:32:25,137 --> 00:32:26,871
and members of congress
want to attend
777
00:32:26,939 --> 00:32:30,341
before we can open it up
to regular people.
778
00:32:30,409 --> 00:32:33,344
Pam, you know how you and Jim
did your ironic wedding?
779
00:32:33,412 --> 00:32:34,879
Do you still have the plans
780
00:32:34,947 --> 00:32:36,547
for the dream wedding
that you couldn't afford?
781
00:32:36,615 --> 00:32:38,416
That was our dream wedding.
782
00:32:38,484 --> 00:32:41,119
Niagara falls?
783
00:32:41,186 --> 00:32:44,255
Pregnant?
That was your dream?
784
00:32:44,323 --> 00:32:46,457
Pork medallions?
785
00:32:47,993 --> 00:32:50,194
I hope...
786
00:32:50,262 --> 00:32:53,131
You have a very beautiful
wedding, Angela.
787
00:32:55,134 --> 00:32:57,135
All right.
788
00:32:57,202 --> 00:32:58,903
Name.
Dwight Schrute.
789
00:32:58,971 --> 00:33:01,072
Thank you, Mr. Scnoot.
We will let you know.
790
00:33:01,140 --> 00:33:02,907
- You have to interview me.
- I just did.
791
00:33:02,975 --> 00:33:04,275
The answer to that one question
792
00:33:04,343 --> 00:33:05,610
told me everything
I need to know.
793
00:33:05,678 --> 00:33:06,878
I demand more questions!
794
00:33:06,945 --> 00:33:08,212
All right, guys.
Good day.
795
00:33:08,280 --> 00:33:09,714
A lot of candidates.
Let's discuss.
796
00:33:09,782 --> 00:33:11,449
Okay. If you're not gonna
interview me,
797
00:33:11,517 --> 00:33:12,950
then I'll do it.
Yes.
798
00:33:14,286 --> 00:33:15,753
What will be
your first priority?
799
00:33:15,821 --> 00:33:19,324
I will have seven
first priorities.
800
00:33:19,391 --> 00:33:21,626
Safety, profits,
801
00:33:21,694 --> 00:33:24,062
fostering a community
of self-reliance
802
00:33:24,129 --> 00:33:25,763
and entrepreneurship,
803
00:33:25,831 --> 00:33:26,764
listening,
804
00:33:26,832 --> 00:33:29,133
respect for human life,
805
00:33:29,201 --> 00:33:30,635
bolstering our public image,
806
00:33:30,703 --> 00:33:34,906
and...
Getting everyone home on time.
807
00:33:34,973 --> 00:33:36,307
Dwight, let me be Frank.
808
00:33:36,375 --> 00:33:38,409
In an accident
that no one can blame you for,
809
00:33:38,477 --> 00:33:41,579
an antique gun was discharged
while you were acting manager.
810
00:33:41,647 --> 00:33:44,482
How are we ever
to trust you again?
811
00:33:47,486 --> 00:33:49,454
That's a great question.
812
00:33:49,521 --> 00:33:51,723
I am going to institute
813
00:33:51,790 --> 00:33:55,259
a strict no firearms policy
for this office
814
00:33:55,327 --> 00:33:58,029
that extends to myself as well.
815
00:33:58,097 --> 00:34:01,366
Wow. All of my concerns
are disappearing.
816
00:34:01,433 --> 00:34:03,301
- Thank you, Dwight.
- Thank you.
817
00:34:07,406 --> 00:34:09,974
You'll be hearing from us
shortly, Mr. Schrute,
818
00:34:10,042 --> 00:34:11,976
and I think you're going to
like the call
819
00:34:12,044 --> 00:34:13,878
you're going to receive.
820
00:34:13,946 --> 00:34:16,881
Oh, come on.
821
00:34:16,949 --> 00:34:19,851
I'm just happy
that I got this meeting.
822
00:34:23,922 --> 00:34:25,056
Well, that was quick.
823
00:34:25,124 --> 00:34:27,892
Very, very interesting.
824
00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:31,129
And you know what?
I'm impressed.
825
00:34:31,196 --> 00:34:33,498
- He's not a real candidate.
- I don't know, Jim,
826
00:34:33,565 --> 00:34:34,899
'cause it makes me think
about something
827
00:34:34,967 --> 00:34:36,367
that my grandfather
used to say, which is that
828
00:34:36,435 --> 00:34:39,003
sometimes the hand
that jumps out of the grave
829
00:34:39,071 --> 00:34:40,505
and grabs you around the throat,
830
00:34:40,572 --> 00:34:42,974
that is the hand
that you want on the wheel.
831
00:34:43,041 --> 00:34:45,076
- You took the deal.
- Yeah. It was a great deal.
832
00:34:45,144 --> 00:34:46,711
- That's not okay.
- I don't know.
833
00:34:46,779 --> 00:34:48,713
Dwight seems like
a great leader to me,
834
00:34:48,781 --> 00:34:50,381
and I look forward
to the personal perks
835
00:34:50,449 --> 00:34:51,849
that he promised me privately.
836
00:34:51,917 --> 00:34:53,184
What do you think, Toby?
837
00:34:53,252 --> 00:34:55,253
Well, we could try him out
for a little while.
838
00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:57,488
If it doesn't work out,
you know,
839
00:34:57,556 --> 00:35:00,057
maybe one of us could,
you know, step in...
840
00:35:00,125 --> 00:35:02,427
What is happening right now?
841
00:35:04,762 --> 00:35:06,778
Is it true that you're
making Dwight the manager?
842
00:35:06,883 --> 00:35:08,317
No. Why would you
think that?
843
00:35:08,385 --> 00:35:10,319
Well, he and Kelly said,
then they pre-fired me.
844
00:35:10,387 --> 00:35:11,387
Okay.
845
00:35:13,757 --> 00:35:15,558
Okay, guys,
just so you all know,
846
00:35:15,625 --> 00:35:17,493
no decision has been made.
847
00:35:17,561 --> 00:35:19,328
And Dwight is definitely
not the boss.
848
00:35:19,396 --> 00:35:20,396
That is correct.
849
00:35:20,464 --> 00:35:22,398
Actually, Dwight is not
the manager yet.
850
00:35:22,466 --> 00:35:24,767
No, no, no, not-- Not ever,
'cause that's not gonna happen.
851
00:35:24,835 --> 00:35:26,869
Well, it's not entirely
up to you, is it?
852
00:35:26,937 --> 00:35:29,538
Seems to me like someone
is getting a little power mad.
853
00:35:29,606 --> 00:35:30,773
Am I the only one who remembers
854
00:35:30,841 --> 00:35:32,174
what he did
when he was in charge?
855
00:35:32,242 --> 00:35:34,410
I feel like I'm going
a little bit crazy.
856
00:35:34,478 --> 00:35:35,878
Tuna...
You're completely sane.
857
00:35:35,946 --> 00:35:38,381
- Thank you.
- Who do you like for the job?
858
00:35:38,448 --> 00:35:40,282
Is there anyone who maybe
859
00:35:40,350 --> 00:35:41,951
was a little underwhelming
at first
860
00:35:42,018 --> 00:35:43,652
but now seems like a safe...
861
00:35:43,720 --> 00:35:46,689
If not slightly unexciting
choice?
862
00:35:46,757 --> 00:35:50,226
Okay. It seems like everybody
has an opinion, so who else?
863
00:35:50,293 --> 00:35:51,927
Anybody?
Do you mean it?
864
00:35:51,995 --> 00:35:53,796
Anybody?
Are you sure?
865
00:35:53,864 --> 00:35:55,631
I suppose I am.
866
00:35:55,699 --> 00:35:59,201
Okay. Well, what do I want
in a manager?
867
00:35:59,269 --> 00:36:01,704
Let me see.
868
00:36:01,772 --> 00:36:05,141
What do I want?
869
00:36:05,208 --> 00:36:07,243
I don't think he meant--
870
00:36:07,310 --> 00:36:09,612
So now anyone gets to talk
at any time?
871
00:36:09,679 --> 00:36:11,247
Go ahead.
872
00:36:11,314 --> 00:36:14,383
What do I want?
873
00:36:16,219 --> 00:36:18,621
I'm looking for someone
874
00:36:18,688 --> 00:36:19,955
who...
875
00:36:21,625 --> 00:36:23,926
Everyone is listening to me.
876
00:36:25,228 --> 00:36:26,262
- Can I say--
- Yes.
877
00:36:26,329 --> 00:36:27,830
I think it should be Darryl.
878
00:36:27,898 --> 00:36:29,398
- Okay.
- What a surprise.
879
00:36:29,466 --> 00:36:31,934
Minorities sticking together.
Kelly's on your side.
880
00:36:32,002 --> 00:36:34,637
I'm sorry, is that all
you think of me-- A minority?
881
00:36:34,704 --> 00:36:36,739
I am so much more than that.
882
00:36:36,807 --> 00:36:38,507
I am a dancer.
I'm a singer.
883
00:36:38,575 --> 00:36:39,942
I'm a fashion designer.
884
00:36:40,010 --> 00:36:42,878
Whoever it is,
I think they should be lame.
885
00:36:42,946 --> 00:36:46,649
Kind of a nonthreatening,
moderate personality.
886
00:36:46,716 --> 00:36:48,050
- I want an outsider.
- Perfect.
887
00:36:48,118 --> 00:36:51,520
There are several outside
candidates that we think--
888
00:36:51,588 --> 00:36:52,855
No, I mean an outsider.
889
00:36:52,923 --> 00:36:54,690
Like someone
on the margins of society
890
00:36:54,758 --> 00:36:57,059
who doesn't see things
the way we do,
891
00:36:57,127 --> 00:36:58,661
like a homeless person.
A homeless person.
892
00:36:58,728 --> 00:37:01,330
Really?
A homeless person.
893
00:37:01,398 --> 00:37:02,832
No. You're right, Pam.
894
00:37:02,899 --> 00:37:04,300
Let's just leave them
to the welfare system
895
00:37:04,367 --> 00:37:06,202
and let that handle it.
No, I want you to say
896
00:37:06,269 --> 00:37:08,838
that you think the best person
to be our new manager
897
00:37:08,905 --> 00:37:10,172
is a homeless person.
898
00:37:10,240 --> 00:37:12,007
Let me guess who you want, Pam.
899
00:37:12,075 --> 00:37:13,742
Rachael ray?
The ladies of the view?
900
00:37:13,810 --> 00:37:18,214
I got away with everything
under the last boss,
901
00:37:18,281 --> 00:37:20,182
and it wasn't good for me
at all.
902
00:37:20,250 --> 00:37:23,853
So I want guidance.
I want leadership.
903
00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:26,856
But don't just like
boss me around, you know?
904
00:37:26,923 --> 00:37:28,491
Like lead me.
905
00:37:28,558 --> 00:37:31,827
Lead me...
When I'm in the mood
906
00:37:31,895 --> 00:37:33,529
to be led.
907
00:37:33,597 --> 00:37:35,030
I just want for once
908
00:37:35,098 --> 00:37:37,566
a small, professional,
decisive,
909
00:37:37,634 --> 00:37:39,535
well-hung man
in his 40s.
910
00:37:39,603 --> 00:37:41,237
- Hey, hey, hey!
- Okay, fine.
911
00:37:41,304 --> 00:37:43,472
Uh, the guy with a tiny penis.
912
00:37:43,540 --> 00:37:47,142
Are you happy?
Let's hire that guy!
913
00:37:47,210 --> 00:37:48,644
She may have a point there.
914
00:37:48,712 --> 00:37:51,547
Would a small penis work?
915
00:37:51,615 --> 00:37:53,482
Small to moderate.
916
00:37:53,550 --> 00:37:54,817
Gotta catch a plane.
917
00:37:54,885 --> 00:37:56,585
Oh, hey, Gabe, I'm sorry.
918
00:37:56,653 --> 00:37:58,220
We didn't get you
a cake or anything.
919
00:37:58,288 --> 00:37:59,655
We're gonna miss you.
920
00:37:59,723 --> 00:38:02,558
Oh, well, I'm still the
corporate liaison to the branch.
921
00:38:02,626 --> 00:38:04,994
You are not leaving
without giving me a hug.
922
00:38:06,296 --> 00:38:08,063
Ugh!
Okay, you know what?
923
00:38:08,131 --> 00:38:09,398
You don't need
to make that sound.
924
00:38:09,466 --> 00:38:10,799
I'm sorry.
You were just a lot bonier
925
00:38:10,867 --> 00:38:12,167
than I thought
you were gonna be!
926
00:38:12,235 --> 00:38:14,036
There are plenty of people
who love touching me.
927
00:38:14,104 --> 00:38:15,538
I'm a terrific hugger.
928
00:38:15,605 --> 00:38:17,039
I've been with a bunch of girls
929
00:38:17,107 --> 00:38:19,575
where that's basically
all they wanna do.
930
00:38:19,643 --> 00:38:21,677
I will see you all soon.
Later, man.
931
00:38:21,745 --> 00:38:23,245
- Good luck.
- We'll miss you.
932
00:38:23,313 --> 00:38:24,747
Good luck at your new job.
933
00:38:24,814 --> 00:38:26,282
Uh, listen up.
934
00:38:26,349 --> 00:38:28,083
Listen up, ladies.
935
00:38:28,151 --> 00:38:30,586
I want the job.
936
00:38:30,654 --> 00:38:32,521
There. I said it.
937
00:38:32,589 --> 00:38:34,490
I'm educated.
I'm capable.
938
00:38:34,558 --> 00:38:39,528
I like all of you,
and I won't make any changes.
939
00:38:39,596 --> 00:38:41,363
I see it.
940
00:38:41,431 --> 00:38:44,233
I see it like I see a Mountain
that I'm standing in front of
941
00:38:44,301 --> 00:38:46,268
and facing and I'm liking.
942
00:38:46,336 --> 00:38:47,670
Yeah.
943
00:38:47,737 --> 00:38:49,905
Andy would be wonderful
as boss.
944
00:38:49,973 --> 00:38:52,241
Erin made a good point.
945
00:38:52,309 --> 00:38:56,045
No. We're not related.
I got the call.
946
00:38:56,112 --> 00:38:59,515
But...
I'll tell her some other day.
947
00:38:59,583 --> 00:39:01,250
What about Darryl?
948
00:39:01,318 --> 00:39:04,286
We can all agree
that he's a stand-up guy, right?
949
00:39:04,354 --> 00:39:06,388
Well, let me be clear.
I only speak for myself
950
00:39:06,456 --> 00:39:08,791
and not myself and the senator.
951
00:39:08,858 --> 00:39:10,893
I think we have
some wonderful candidates,
952
00:39:10,961 --> 00:39:13,262
and there is a great
lively debate here.
953
00:39:13,330 --> 00:39:15,397
But let's think about--
- No. No.
954
00:39:15,465 --> 00:39:18,067
No. Sorry. We cut Kevin off
for the same thing.
955
00:39:18,134 --> 00:39:20,102
You have to have something
to say if you talk.
956
00:39:20,170 --> 00:39:22,104
Exactly.
957
00:39:22,172 --> 00:39:24,106
Jada. No, no, no.
Jada, what are you do--
958
00:39:24,174 --> 00:39:26,208
Oh. So sorry, guys.
959
00:39:26,276 --> 00:39:28,811
I hope my family
didn't disrupt your meeting.
960
00:39:28,878 --> 00:39:31,614
Daddy, are these the people
who are making you manager?
961
00:39:31,681 --> 00:39:34,883
Maybe, sweetheart.
962
00:39:34,951 --> 00:39:36,986
Single dad.
Challenges.
963
00:39:37,053 --> 00:39:39,955
I don't know
if he'd be a good manager,
964
00:39:40,023 --> 00:39:41,457
but he's a really great dad.
965
00:39:41,524 --> 00:39:43,292
Okay. Shush.
This was a mistake.
966
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:44,560
Let's go.
967
00:39:44,628 --> 00:39:47,129
It seems like
we all know enough to vote.
968
00:39:47,197 --> 00:39:49,598
Should just vote now?
What? No, no, no.
969
00:39:49,666 --> 00:39:50,899
It's not a vote.
Then what was this all about?
970
00:39:50,967 --> 00:39:52,067
I don't know.
971
00:39:52,135 --> 00:39:53,502
This conversation
really got away from me.
972
00:39:53,570 --> 00:39:55,004
I don't care.
They can just vote.
973
00:39:55,071 --> 00:39:56,672
No, they can't.
974
00:39:56,740 --> 00:39:58,474
That's not how
this is gonna work.
975
00:39:58,541 --> 00:39:59,908
We're going in this room.
976
00:39:59,976 --> 00:40:01,410
We're gonna have a meeting.
977
00:40:01,478 --> 00:40:03,312
We're gonna make
a recommendation to Jo,
978
00:40:03,380 --> 00:40:05,881
and she's gonna give you her
recommendation on Monday, okay?
979
00:40:05,949 --> 00:40:08,050
What the hell happened
out there?
980
00:40:12,122 --> 00:40:15,257
Sometimes you hear people
talking about failing upwards.
981
00:40:15,325 --> 00:40:18,694
I think I'm about to do that.
982
00:40:18,762 --> 00:40:21,530
This job?
Oh, yeah, I'll get it.
983
00:40:21,598 --> 00:40:23,732
Jo's an old friend.
984
00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:26,835
I think...
I'm her best friend.
985
00:40:26,903 --> 00:40:28,671
She's not my best friend.
986
00:40:28,738 --> 00:40:30,572
Every day,
I have a blueberry muffin.
987
00:40:30,640 --> 00:40:33,575
Today I did not have
a blueberry muffin.
988
00:40:33,643 --> 00:40:36,278
Should have had
the blueberry muffin.
989
00:40:36,346 --> 00:40:39,715
Especially considering how
incredibly superstitious I am.
990
00:40:39,783 --> 00:40:42,584
No. I've never been more sure
of anything in my life.
991
00:40:42,652 --> 00:40:46,221
I will be the new boss of...
992
00:40:46,289 --> 00:40:48,691
Vance refrigeration.
993
00:40:48,758 --> 00:40:51,527
Honestly, I think I--
I sabotaged myself.
994
00:40:51,594 --> 00:40:55,431
It's like I'm afraid
of being happy.
995
00:40:55,498 --> 00:40:57,433
Case in point...
996
00:40:57,500 --> 00:41:00,002
I was supposed to start
another job today.
997
00:41:00,070 --> 00:41:02,538
I will get offered the job.
998
00:41:02,605 --> 00:41:05,607
That's a...Call I've received
many times.
999
00:41:05,675 --> 00:41:08,610
The slight...
Hopefulness in their voice,
1000
00:41:08,678 --> 00:41:10,979
the pregnant pause
while they...
1001
00:41:11,047 --> 00:41:13,382
Wait to hear my response.
1002
00:41:13,450 --> 00:41:16,385
And then...
My response.
1003
00:41:17,654 --> 00:41:18,787
I want the job.
1004
00:41:18,855 --> 00:41:20,489
I really do.
1005
00:41:20,557 --> 00:41:21,890
It's just the rest
of my family's
1006
00:41:21,958 --> 00:41:23,425
in the Finger Lakes right now.
1007
00:41:23,493 --> 00:41:26,161
I'm supposed to be
in the Finger Lakes right now.
1008
00:41:26,229 --> 00:41:29,631
I told 'em I was on a hike,
snuck away to do this interview.
1009
00:41:29,699 --> 00:41:32,568
I gotta get back pretty soon.
They'll worry.
1010
00:41:32,635 --> 00:41:34,703
People disappear
in the Finger Lakes.
1011
00:41:34,771 --> 00:41:36,972
I will run this branch
1012
00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:41,977
or I will destroy this branch.
1013
00:41:42,045 --> 00:41:44,179
Or...I don't know.
1014
00:41:44,247 --> 00:41:46,048
Something always works out.
1015
00:41:50,988 --> 00:41:55,721
Sync by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
1016
00:41:57,633 --> 00:41:59,934
You remind me so much
of my fourth biggest client.
1017
00:42:00,002 --> 00:42:01,169
Is that right?
1018
00:42:01,236 --> 00:42:02,637
I think you two should meet.
1019
00:42:02,705 --> 00:42:04,605
Well, okay...
1020
00:42:04,673 --> 00:42:06,007
Hey, Jordana, patch my ninth
1021
00:42:06,075 --> 00:42:08,009
and my fourth biggest client
together.
1022
00:42:12,181 --> 00:42:14,449
Hello?
Hello!
1023
00:42:14,516 --> 00:42:17,452
Hi, how are ya?
Oh, I'm good!
1024
00:42:17,453 --> 00:42:21,346
Don't you just love paper
and things about paper?
1025
00:42:21,758 --> 00:42:25,093
Hey! Are you single? This seems
like a love connection to me!
1026
00:42:25,484 --> 00:42:27,000
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