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1
00:00:03,247 --> 00:00:04,844
Oh, it's-it's you again.
2
00:00:04,846 --> 00:00:07,245
Okay, here's-here's what...
Here's what happened.
3
00:00:07,247 --> 00:00:09,245
Carrie put on this brown wig
4
00:00:09,247 --> 00:00:11,100
and was running out into traffic,
5
00:00:11,102 --> 00:00:14,048
and the guy I thought
was the bad guy isn't,
6
00:00:14,050 --> 00:00:16,579
and her boyfriend is the suicide bomber.
7
00:00:16,581 --> 00:00:18,828
You believe that shit? [laughs]
8
00:00:18,830 --> 00:00:20,901
- [man] Wrong show, Frank.
- What?
9
00:00:20,903 --> 00:00:23,037
[man] That's Homeland, not Shameless.
10
00:00:23,039 --> 00:00:24,285
Oh.
11
00:00:25,164 --> 00:00:26,454
Fuck.
12
00:00:26,456 --> 00:00:27,610
Wow.
13
00:00:28,622 --> 00:00:30,495
Don't mix Percocet with beer.
14
00:00:30,497 --> 00:00:32,495
[rock music]
15
00:00:32,497 --> 00:00:34,495
- Who's the new barback?
- [Veronica] That's Santiago.
16
00:00:34,497 --> 00:00:36,329
He's staying with us until
we find his father.
17
00:00:36,331 --> 00:00:38,420
They were gonna go live
with his uncle in Indiana.
18
00:00:38,422 --> 00:00:41,213
How are we gonna find some
random Guatemalan guy
19
00:00:41,215 --> 00:00:42,317
in Gary, Indiana?
20
00:00:42,319 --> 00:00:43,870
I did a web search: "Where to find
21
00:00:43,872 --> 00:00:46,051
illegal immigrants, Gary, Indiana."
22
00:00:46,053 --> 00:00:47,579
Got a whole list of places.
23
00:00:47,581 --> 00:00:49,265
[Tommy] You find Santiago's uncle?
24
00:00:49,267 --> 00:00:51,214
Oh, yeah. Found him and then lost him.
25
00:00:51,216 --> 00:00:52,703
Fly, my Mexican friend!
26
00:00:52,705 --> 00:00:55,263
- Guatemalan.
- Guatemalan friend!
27
00:00:55,265 --> 00:00:56,509
Fly!
28
00:00:56,511 --> 00:00:59,678
Liam, your share of the
bills this month: $70.
29
00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:01,579
- I'm nine.
- Figure it out.
30
00:01:01,581 --> 00:01:04,370
Carl, your share of the bill
this month is 70 bucks.
31
00:01:04,372 --> 00:01:05,831
Maybe you should get a real job
32
00:01:05,833 --> 00:01:07,643
and stop hanging out with
your girlfriend so much.
33
00:01:07,645 --> 00:01:09,139
Ingrid and I are pregnant.
34
00:01:09,141 --> 00:01:10,882
- Triplets?
- Sextuplets.
35
00:01:10,884 --> 00:01:12,662
And we're hiding from a North Korean
36
00:01:12,664 --> 00:01:15,116
fertility specialist, so make room.
37
00:01:15,118 --> 00:01:17,949
- We are moving in.
- Oh, that's hysterical.
38
00:01:17,951 --> 00:01:19,863
Do you really think we can
afford more than one?
39
00:01:19,865 --> 00:01:21,098
You'll get a job.
40
00:01:21,100 --> 00:01:22,124
[laughs]
41
00:01:22,924 --> 00:01:24,662
"Dreams dead? You're our man.
42
00:01:24,664 --> 00:01:26,703
Be the Hobo Loco Man."
Kev, what is this?
43
00:01:26,705 --> 00:01:28,237
They're holding a competition
44
00:01:28,239 --> 00:01:31,703
to choose the Hobo Loco spokesperson.
45
00:01:31,705 --> 00:01:34,245
The winner gets a $50,000 contract
46
00:01:34,247 --> 00:01:37,370
to be in a social media campaign.
47
00:01:37,372 --> 00:01:38,557
This is me.
48
00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:41,120
I'm the Hobo Loco Man.
49
00:01:41,122 --> 00:01:43,120
You smell like a barroom floor.
50
00:01:43,122 --> 00:01:44,809
♪♪♪
51
00:01:44,811 --> 00:01:47,776
I don't need anything from you!
52
00:01:47,778 --> 00:01:50,120
- She do this a lot?
- [Lip] Yeah.
53
00:01:50,122 --> 00:01:51,914
Well, lately.
54
00:01:58,705 --> 00:02:01,040
[rock music]
55
00:02:01,042 --> 00:02:05,828
Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
56
00:02:05,830 --> 00:02:08,828
♪ Think of all the luck you got ♪
57
00:02:08,830 --> 00:02:12,162
♪ Know that it's not for naught ♪
58
00:02:12,164 --> 00:02:15,329
♪ You were beaming once before ♪
59
00:02:15,331 --> 00:02:19,620
♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪
60
00:02:19,622 --> 00:02:22,995
♪ What is this downside ♪
61
00:02:22,997 --> 00:02:26,454
♪ That you speak of? ♪
62
00:02:26,456 --> 00:02:28,537
♪ What is this feeling ♪
63
00:02:28,539 --> 00:02:33,203
♪ You're so sure of? ♪
64
00:02:33,205 --> 00:02:38,122
♪♪♪
65
00:02:40,081 --> 00:02:43,370
♪ Round up the friends you got ♪
66
00:02:43,372 --> 00:02:46,454
♪ Know that they're not for naught ♪
67
00:02:46,456 --> 00:02:49,786
♪ You were willing once before ♪
68
00:02:49,788 --> 00:02:54,037
♪ But it's not like that anymore ♪
69
00:02:54,039 --> 00:02:57,495
♪ What is this downside ♪
70
00:02:57,497 --> 00:03:00,911
♪ That you speak of? ♪
71
00:03:00,913 --> 00:03:02,745
♪ What is this feeling ♪
72
00:03:02,747 --> 00:03:06,813
♪ You're so sure of? ♪
73
00:03:07,664 --> 00:03:10,995
[distant siren wailing]
74
00:03:10,997 --> 00:03:12,664
[train rumbling]
75
00:03:17,456 --> 00:03:20,537
[rock music]
76
00:03:20,539 --> 00:03:25,701
♪♪♪
77
00:03:25,703 --> 00:03:28,203
♪ Silicone sour ♪
78
00:03:28,205 --> 00:03:31,670
♪ Burning the hours of the night away ♪
79
00:03:31,672 --> 00:03:34,495
♪♪♪
80
00:03:34,497 --> 00:03:36,828
♪ In retro bass ♪
81
00:03:36,830 --> 00:03:40,620
♪ From the east side moving right away ♪
82
00:03:40,622 --> 00:03:41,953
♪♪♪
83
00:03:41,955 --> 00:03:44,370
♪ You're a satellite ♪
84
00:03:44,372 --> 00:03:46,495
[humming]
85
00:03:46,497 --> 00:03:49,620
♪ And I'm on your website ♪
86
00:03:49,622 --> 00:03:52,037
♪♪♪
87
00:03:52,039 --> 00:03:55,037
♪ Miley doesn't miss you ♪
88
00:03:55,039 --> 00:03:58,953
♪ She got the spread
on the college issue ♪
89
00:03:58,955 --> 00:04:01,078
♪♪♪
90
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:03,703
♪ You're gonna try to save her ♪
91
00:04:03,705 --> 00:04:05,396
♪ You start to blame her... ♪
92
00:04:05,398 --> 00:04:06,746
Oh, shit.
93
00:04:06,748 --> 00:04:07,918
You open?
94
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,537
♪ So you gotta be famous ♪
95
00:04:10,539 --> 00:04:12,620
Twenty-four hours.
96
00:04:12,622 --> 00:04:14,203
♪ It's a golden age ♪
97
00:04:14,205 --> 00:04:15,579
You sit wherever you want.
98
00:04:15,581 --> 00:04:17,245
♪♪♪
99
00:04:17,247 --> 00:04:20,662
♪ It's a golden age ♪
100
00:04:20,664 --> 00:04:22,233
♪♪♪
101
00:04:22,235 --> 00:04:23,828
♪ It's a golden age ♪
102
00:04:23,830 --> 00:04:25,870
I'll bring menus to you.
103
00:04:25,872 --> 00:04:27,120
Are you hiring?
104
00:04:27,122 --> 00:04:28,287
♪ It's a golden age ♪
105
00:04:28,289 --> 00:04:29,412
What?
106
00:04:29,414 --> 00:04:30,647
I'm a hard worker.
107
00:04:30,649 --> 00:04:32,329
♪♪♪
108
00:04:32,331 --> 00:04:33,662
[radio clicks off]
109
00:04:33,664 --> 00:04:35,164
How about this booth right over here?
110
00:04:43,872 --> 00:04:45,830
Got any more where this came from?
111
00:04:48,289 --> 00:04:51,911
Couple hours after last call,
but get you some coffee.
112
00:04:51,913 --> 00:04:54,081
So you're just drinking
on the job, then?
113
00:04:55,419 --> 00:04:57,793
Everything okay out here, Fiona?
114
00:05:07,081 --> 00:05:08,789
Let's get out of here.
115
00:05:23,122 --> 00:05:24,206
[Fiona softly] Shit.
116
00:05:27,872 --> 00:05:29,911
Shit. Shit.
117
00:05:29,913 --> 00:05:31,537
Shit.
118
00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:32,498
You all right?
119
00:05:34,830 --> 00:05:36,039
Yeah.
120
00:05:37,914 --> 00:05:39,289
Good.
121
00:05:41,061 --> 00:05:43,953
[rock music]
122
00:05:43,955 --> 00:05:49,081
♪♪♪
123
00:05:57,830 --> 00:05:59,539
Nothing but junk mail.
124
00:06:01,373 --> 00:06:03,412
Rat shit in the attic.
125
00:06:03,414 --> 00:06:05,054
Fires in the dryer vent.
126
00:06:05,056 --> 00:06:06,786
These ads are terrifying.
127
00:06:06,788 --> 00:06:08,914
Carbon monoxide leaks from the furnace?
128
00:06:08,916 --> 00:06:10,620
Fiona always handled this shit.
129
00:06:10,622 --> 00:06:12,579
Should I be worried about these things?
130
00:06:12,581 --> 00:06:14,911
Ah, homeowner stuff.
131
00:06:14,913 --> 00:06:17,081
Sucks to be an adult.
132
00:06:24,747 --> 00:06:27,522
What? I'm eating for seven now.
133
00:06:27,524 --> 00:06:29,149
Well, then all seven
of you are gonna need
134
00:06:29,151 --> 00:06:30,995
to cough up cash if you're
gonna be living here.
135
00:06:30,997 --> 00:06:32,309
All right.
136
00:06:32,311 --> 00:06:33,620
I'm gonna do some therapy sessions
137
00:06:33,622 --> 00:06:35,162
on the phone this afternoon.
138
00:06:35,164 --> 00:06:37,039
I'll write you a check later.
139
00:06:38,955 --> 00:06:40,537
[Debbie] Hey. Where you guys going?
140
00:06:40,539 --> 00:06:41,865
Softball camp.
141
00:06:41,867 --> 00:06:45,145
I got a call from one of
those 20 jobs I applied for.
142
00:06:45,147 --> 00:06:46,717
Nice. Which one?
143
00:06:46,719 --> 00:06:48,503
Some seafood restaurant place.
144
00:06:48,505 --> 00:06:50,684
Carl Gallagher's going legit.
145
00:06:50,686 --> 00:06:51,724
Minimum wage?
146
00:06:51,726 --> 00:06:53,512
Only job someone like me can get.
147
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:55,287
You know, you really
can't put "drug dealer"
148
00:06:55,289 --> 00:06:57,158
or "gunrunner" on your West Point app.
149
00:06:57,160 --> 00:06:59,037
Come on, babe.
150
00:06:59,039 --> 00:07:00,846
[Liam] Can we call the plumber guy?
151
00:07:00,848 --> 00:07:02,870
Says he can snake our tub for ten bucks.
152
00:07:02,872 --> 00:07:04,245
What's wrong with our tub?
153
00:07:04,247 --> 00:07:05,911
It has two inches of scummy water in it
154
00:07:05,913 --> 00:07:07,951
all the time that doesn't drain.
155
00:07:07,953 --> 00:07:09,537
Good morning, family one.
156
00:07:09,539 --> 00:07:11,220
Family two.
157
00:07:11,222 --> 00:07:12,911
Why do you look like a farm animal?
158
00:07:12,913 --> 00:07:14,329
[Liam] Smell like one too.
159
00:07:14,331 --> 00:07:17,388
Your father is gonna
be the new Hobo Loco
160
00:07:17,390 --> 00:07:19,412
beverage spokesperson.
161
00:07:19,414 --> 00:07:22,247
Now, I haven't won the
competition yet, Ingy.
162
00:07:22,704 --> 00:07:24,495
Hobo what-o?
163
00:07:24,497 --> 00:07:27,081
It's a delicious alcoholic beverage.
164
00:07:27,083 --> 00:07:28,412
They're looking for someone
165
00:07:28,414 --> 00:07:29,995
with no purpose in life.
166
00:07:29,997 --> 00:07:32,235
I finally found my calling.
167
00:07:32,237 --> 00:07:35,949
Soon I'll be able to
support those I love.
168
00:07:36,703 --> 00:07:38,036
Oh, yeah.
169
00:07:41,373 --> 00:07:42,504
Wish me luck.
170
00:07:42,997 --> 00:07:46,870
Oh, you go get 'em, my Hobo Loco tiger.
171
00:07:46,872 --> 00:07:49,530
Good-bye, little Frank-ettes.
172
00:07:51,955 --> 00:07:53,997
[both sigh]
173
00:07:55,539 --> 00:07:57,495
No need to even hold a competition.
174
00:07:57,497 --> 00:07:58,755
If it involves alcohol,
175
00:07:58,757 --> 00:08:00,456
they should just give him the prize.
176
00:08:01,777 --> 00:08:03,810
Think we need to worry about termites?
177
00:08:06,470 --> 00:08:09,078
[train rumbling]
178
00:08:09,080 --> 00:08:10,786
The hell's going on?
179
00:08:10,788 --> 00:08:12,620
Jesus, it's almost 7:30.
180
00:08:12,622 --> 00:08:14,370
Place is closed.
181
00:08:14,372 --> 00:08:16,297
W-well, where's Fiona?
182
00:08:16,299 --> 00:08:18,323
We already turned away
a bunch of customers.
183
00:08:18,325 --> 00:08:19,620
Well, let's get set up fast
184
00:08:19,622 --> 00:08:21,373
so we don't lose any more business.
185
00:08:22,224 --> 00:08:23,495
Okay, let's get the coffee going.
186
00:08:23,497 --> 00:08:24,519
Fire up the grills.
187
00:08:24,521 --> 00:08:25,870
Make sure the ketchups are married.
188
00:08:25,872 --> 00:08:27,140
I'll get the blinds.
189
00:08:28,914 --> 00:08:29,911
All right, set the tables.
190
00:08:29,913 --> 00:08:31,346
Let's go, guys. Come on.
191
00:08:36,789 --> 00:08:38,414
Hey, Eliza.
192
00:08:41,705 --> 00:08:43,856
[Eliza scoffs] She alive?
193
00:08:43,858 --> 00:08:45,329
Yo, wakey-wakey!
194
00:08:45,331 --> 00:08:46,786
- Get the fuck away from me!
- Whoa, whoa!
195
00:08:46,788 --> 00:08:47,911
[Tyesha] Take it easy!
196
00:08:47,913 --> 00:08:49,911
[sighs] Shit.
197
00:08:49,913 --> 00:08:51,506
Sorry.
198
00:08:51,508 --> 00:08:52,960
You okay?
199
00:08:52,962 --> 00:08:55,614
Yeah. Uh, what time is it?
200
00:08:55,616 --> 00:08:57,453
Why was this place locked?
201
00:08:58,955 --> 00:09:01,953
Oh, uh...
202
00:09:01,955 --> 00:09:04,579
I was doing the cash out late,
203
00:09:04,581 --> 00:09:06,454
and I, uh, went into the back office
204
00:09:06,456 --> 00:09:08,537
for a second, and these...
205
00:09:08,539 --> 00:09:10,870
three sketchy guys just
came out of nowhere,
206
00:09:10,872 --> 00:09:12,370
and I thought they were gonna rob me
207
00:09:12,372 --> 00:09:14,391
or... I don't know what.
208
00:09:14,393 --> 00:09:16,579
[Eliza] My God. Are you okay?
209
00:09:16,581 --> 00:09:18,037
I-I locked up. I didn't know
210
00:09:18,039 --> 00:09:19,495
if they were still hanging around,
211
00:09:19,497 --> 00:09:20,953
and I didn't want to go home
or take the I that late
212
00:09:20,955 --> 00:09:22,637
in case they tried to follow me.
213
00:09:24,217 --> 00:09:27,071
You left the cash out when
you went in the back office?
214
00:09:28,693 --> 00:09:29,735
Yeah, it's fine.
215
00:09:33,331 --> 00:09:34,579
All right.
216
00:09:34,581 --> 00:09:37,488
Um, I'm gonna go and take a shower,
217
00:09:37,490 --> 00:09:40,953
and, uh, I will be back
for the lunch shift,
218
00:09:40,955 --> 00:09:42,789
and it won't happen again.
219
00:09:48,039 --> 00:09:50,052
[Tami] See? Shampoo.
220
00:09:50,054 --> 00:09:51,559
Not dish liquid.
221
00:09:51,561 --> 00:09:53,599
That's an interesting concept.
222
00:09:53,601 --> 00:09:54,813
Here, let me show you.
223
00:09:56,331 --> 00:09:57,789
All right.
224
00:10:02,247 --> 00:10:04,087
Oh, man. Yeah, that, uh...
225
00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:07,078
that actually feels really good.
226
00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:09,037
I give great head, huh?
227
00:10:09,039 --> 00:10:10,537
Yeah, it's better than
your regular head.
228
00:10:10,539 --> 00:10:11,903
- Hey!
- [Tahetia] Knock, knock, knock!
229
00:10:11,905 --> 00:10:13,038
- Just me.
- [Lip] Jesus, dude!
230
00:10:13,040 --> 00:10:14,418
And I'm not looking at your dick.
231
00:10:14,420 --> 00:10:16,633
- I just left my retainer in here.
- Ew!
232
00:10:16,635 --> 00:10:18,662
I lied. I looked at your dick. Bye!
233
00:10:18,664 --> 00:10:20,203
Hey, your stupid boyfriend
still owes me $300
234
00:10:20,205 --> 00:10:22,058
for the Comcast bill!
235
00:10:24,695 --> 00:10:26,245
You gotta lose those guys.
236
00:10:26,247 --> 00:10:27,454
Yeah, then I gotta go
through the bullshit
237
00:10:27,456 --> 00:10:28,863
of getting a new roommate.
238
00:10:29,648 --> 00:10:31,773
Okay, turn around. Your turn.
239
00:10:33,087 --> 00:10:34,745
- All right.
- Are you off today?
240
00:10:34,747 --> 00:10:36,203
Yeah.
241
00:10:36,205 --> 00:10:37,662
Me too.
242
00:10:37,664 --> 00:10:38,786
Oh.
243
00:10:38,788 --> 00:10:40,620
We should do something.
244
00:10:40,622 --> 00:10:42,662
Why? You're not hanging
around with Boone?
245
00:10:42,664 --> 00:10:44,953
[laughs] No, he's on
his way back to Yemen.
246
00:10:44,955 --> 00:10:46,786
Isn't that where all
those land mines are?
247
00:10:46,788 --> 00:10:48,495
Fingers crossed.
248
00:10:48,497 --> 00:10:50,828
So let's hang out. Never
done that before.
249
00:10:50,830 --> 00:10:52,780
We could see if we even like each other.
250
00:10:53,604 --> 00:10:55,428
I got boring shit to do all day.
251
00:10:55,430 --> 00:10:57,828
Me too. We can do it together.
252
00:10:57,830 --> 00:11:00,465
Aah! Turn around.
253
00:11:00,467 --> 00:11:02,620
- Take a look.
- Oh, nice.
254
00:11:02,622 --> 00:11:04,162
- It's good.
- Yeah, I like it.
255
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:05,370
Right, you see, I give good head too.
256
00:11:05,372 --> 00:11:08,456
[laughs] What is this?
257
00:11:09,331 --> 00:11:12,786
[Santiago] Diablas! Las diablas!
258
00:11:12,788 --> 00:11:14,287
Santiago.
259
00:11:14,289 --> 00:11:16,287
He probably had a nightmare again.
260
00:11:16,289 --> 00:11:17,870
[Santiago yelling]
261
00:11:17,872 --> 00:11:19,037
- [Santiago] Ow!
- [girls] Die! Die!
262
00:11:19,039 --> 00:11:21,677
[Santiago speaking Spanish]
No, please. Stop, please.
263
00:11:21,679 --> 00:11:23,911
Girls! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
264
00:11:23,913 --> 00:11:26,404
- Stop. What are you doing?
- Hey! You're hurting him!
265
00:11:26,406 --> 00:11:28,878
- [Kev] You duct taped him?
- [Veronica] And handcuffs?
266
00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:30,662
Santiago, I am so sorry.
267
00:11:30,664 --> 00:11:32,370
You have to forgive them.
268
00:11:32,372 --> 00:11:34,245
The-the girls are a little bit wild.
269
00:11:34,247 --> 00:11:36,911
Preschool was supposed
to be taming them.
270
00:11:36,913 --> 00:11:39,258
Come on, baby. Let's
go get you some juice.
271
00:11:40,310 --> 00:11:43,100
Girls, what has gotten into you?
272
00:11:43,102 --> 00:11:45,715
- We don't hurt people.
- We don't?
273
00:11:45,717 --> 00:11:48,034
No, of course not. We have to be nice,
274
00:11:48,036 --> 00:11:49,828
and Santiago's part of our family.
275
00:11:49,830 --> 00:11:52,120
- No.
- Yes, honey,
276
00:11:52,122 --> 00:11:54,308
and his sister's gonna be here soon too.
277
00:11:54,310 --> 00:11:55,928
No, they go home.
278
00:11:55,930 --> 00:11:58,163
They don't have a home.
279
00:11:58,165 --> 00:12:00,579
Bad people wanted to turn
them into sex slaves
280
00:12:00,581 --> 00:12:01,745
and gang members.
281
00:12:01,747 --> 00:12:03,421
Kev, please stop talking.
282
00:12:03,423 --> 00:12:04,745
I'm trying to teach them. I'm...
283
00:12:04,747 --> 00:12:06,329
They're four years old. Come on, girls.
284
00:12:06,331 --> 00:12:07,522
It's time to get dressed for school.
285
00:12:07,524 --> 00:12:08,914
Take Santiago to the bar.
286
00:12:11,581 --> 00:12:12,870
[Kev] Santiago.
287
00:12:12,872 --> 00:12:14,530
What do you say?
288
00:12:14,532 --> 00:12:16,745
Me and you having some
quality dad time together?
289
00:12:16,747 --> 00:12:18,120
Huh? Let's do it!
290
00:12:18,122 --> 00:12:19,749
- [whimpers]
- No, no.
291
00:12:19,751 --> 00:12:21,460
God, I'm so sorry.
292
00:12:23,461 --> 00:12:25,699
- [indistinct chatter]
- Yeah, just hold up the shirt.
293
00:12:25,701 --> 00:12:27,953
Nice!
294
00:12:27,955 --> 00:12:31,412
Hey, Hobo Loco is trending
in the top 50 right now.
295
00:12:31,414 --> 00:12:33,133
Thought we'd have,
like, 30 homeless here
296
00:12:33,135 --> 00:12:34,598
and that'd be it.
297
00:12:34,600 --> 00:12:36,786
[laughs] Hey, everyone!
298
00:12:36,788 --> 00:12:38,995
Let me all hear you say,
299
00:12:38,997 --> 00:12:41,245
"I love Hobo Loco!"
300
00:12:41,247 --> 00:12:44,245
[all] I love Hobo Loco!
301
00:12:44,247 --> 00:12:47,414
[crowd cheering]
302
00:12:50,039 --> 00:12:51,745
Are you fucking kidding me?
303
00:12:51,747 --> 00:12:53,370
Who are all these people?
304
00:12:53,372 --> 00:12:55,454
Jesus.
305
00:12:55,456 --> 00:12:59,786
Hey, is everybody here for
the Hobo Loco competition?
306
00:12:59,788 --> 00:13:02,247
Apparently so, but I'm
gonna win this thing.
307
00:13:03,539 --> 00:13:06,370
Gonna be hard, since I'm a shoo-in.
308
00:13:06,372 --> 00:13:07,994
That right?
309
00:13:07,996 --> 00:13:11,037
I've never held the same
job for more than 37 days.
310
00:13:11,039 --> 00:13:14,107
I spent my life savings on
a Blockbuster franchise
311
00:13:14,109 --> 00:13:15,682
in 2013.
312
00:13:16,539 --> 00:13:20,123
I buried a bipolar wife, a
cancer-riddled girlfriend,
313
00:13:20,125 --> 00:13:21,729
and a mother who never loved me.
314
00:13:21,731 --> 00:13:23,620
Two-thirds of my penis got blown off
315
00:13:23,622 --> 00:13:25,620
in the First Gulf War.
316
00:13:25,622 --> 00:13:28,162
I won the lottery in 2006
317
00:13:28,164 --> 00:13:30,037
and accidentally used the winning ticket
318
00:13:30,039 --> 00:13:31,983
as a rolling paper.
319
00:13:31,985 --> 00:13:34,206
I grew up in Flint, Michigan.
320
00:13:38,855 --> 00:13:39,896
Frank Gallagher.
321
00:13:39,898 --> 00:13:41,127
Mikey O'Shea.
322
00:13:42,581 --> 00:13:44,612
Irish, huh?
323
00:13:44,614 --> 00:13:46,926
Well, the dead junkie whose
wallet I acquired was.
324
00:13:47,955 --> 00:13:49,456
Very impressive.
325
00:13:50,747 --> 00:13:52,078
Why do these fucking posers
326
00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:54,412
think they can steal our thunder?
327
00:13:54,414 --> 00:13:56,078
Because their parents told them
328
00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:57,995
they could be anything
they wanted to be.
329
00:13:57,997 --> 00:14:00,245
[laughs]
330
00:14:00,247 --> 00:14:01,864
Let's teach 'em a lesson.
331
00:14:01,866 --> 00:14:02,870
Let's kick ass.
332
00:14:02,872 --> 00:14:04,120
Excuse us. Excuse us.
333
00:14:04,122 --> 00:14:05,120
- Excuse me!
- Excuse us.
334
00:14:05,122 --> 00:14:06,495
- VIP!
- Coming through.
335
00:14:06,497 --> 00:14:07,828
Coming through. This way. One second.
336
00:14:07,830 --> 00:14:08,911
Look out. Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
337
00:14:08,913 --> 00:14:10,703
Let the real hobos through!
338
00:14:10,705 --> 00:14:12,495
Don't be rude. Don't be rude.
339
00:14:12,497 --> 00:14:13,662
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
- Come on, excuse us.
340
00:14:13,664 --> 00:14:15,745
- Hey! Hey, hey, hey.
- Good God.
341
00:14:15,747 --> 00:14:17,573
We're here for the competition.
342
00:14:17,575 --> 00:14:19,870
- [Frank] Where do we sign?
- They cut the line!
343
00:14:19,872 --> 00:14:21,662
- [crowd yelling]
- And that's exactly
344
00:14:21,664 --> 00:14:23,287
the kind of spunk we're looking for.
345
00:14:23,289 --> 00:14:24,620
Do you hear that, Phi Piggie Piggie?
346
00:14:24,622 --> 00:14:26,120
That's what they're looking for.
347
00:14:26,122 --> 00:14:28,675
Get your spunk-less ass out of here!
348
00:14:28,677 --> 00:14:30,497
- [Frank] You should learn.
- [Amber] Hey, fellas.
349
00:14:30,499 --> 00:14:31,995
I just... I just need you
to sign in right here.
350
00:14:31,997 --> 00:14:33,145
Oh, right away.
351
00:14:33,147 --> 00:14:34,245
- Done.
- Again, yeah.
352
00:14:34,247 --> 00:14:35,662
Great. Mm-hmm.
353
00:14:35,664 --> 00:14:36,995
Okay, next, I'm gonna need to test
354
00:14:36,997 --> 00:14:39,120
your baseline blood alcohol content.
355
00:14:39,122 --> 00:14:41,412
Right this way.
356
00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:43,373
Here we are.
357
00:14:45,289 --> 00:14:46,203
[rock music]
358
00:14:46,205 --> 00:14:48,245
[both blowing heavily]
359
00:14:48,247 --> 00:14:51,162
[devices beeping]
360
00:14:51,164 --> 00:14:52,370
Point two-three.
361
00:14:52,372 --> 00:14:53,639
Nice.
362
00:14:54,705 --> 00:14:56,589
Point two-seven.
363
00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:58,078
Whoa.
364
00:14:58,080 --> 00:14:59,454
All in a day's work.
365
00:14:59,456 --> 00:15:01,481
Whoo. [laughs] Great job.
366
00:15:01,483 --> 00:15:02,911
Okay, now, over here,
367
00:15:02,913 --> 00:15:04,162
you're gonna need to drink two ounces
368
00:15:04,164 --> 00:15:07,037
of Hobo Loco in less than 15 seconds,
369
00:15:07,039 --> 00:15:08,703
and please, no throwing up on me.
370
00:15:08,705 --> 00:15:11,120
Please use the trash can over here.
371
00:15:11,122 --> 00:15:15,285
Okay, and...
372
00:15:15,287 --> 00:15:16,287
[timer clicks]
373
00:15:16,289 --> 00:15:18,325
OMG. That was amazing.
374
00:15:18,327 --> 00:15:19,370
It's like drinking water.
375
00:15:19,372 --> 00:15:21,162
More like watered-down water.
376
00:15:21,164 --> 00:15:23,590
[laughs] Well, have a Hobo Loco hat.
377
00:15:23,592 --> 00:15:25,037
Agency will be announcing
the contestants
378
00:15:25,039 --> 00:15:26,037
in just a bit.
379
00:15:26,039 --> 00:15:27,162
All right, next.
380
00:15:27,164 --> 00:15:28,911
[clicks tongue]
381
00:15:28,913 --> 00:15:30,911
Good luck, J-holes. [laughs]
382
00:15:30,913 --> 00:15:32,245
You hear that, douchebags?
383
00:15:32,247 --> 00:15:33,370
[laughs]
384
00:15:33,372 --> 00:15:34,745
♪♪♪
385
00:15:34,747 --> 00:15:36,620
This is the dining area.
386
00:15:36,622 --> 00:15:38,370
I was really impressed with your résumé.
387
00:15:38,372 --> 00:15:40,786
- Really?
- Kitchen.
388
00:15:40,788 --> 00:15:42,432
Yeah.
389
00:15:42,434 --> 00:15:44,329
Military man, hmm?
390
00:15:44,331 --> 00:15:45,911
Mmm-mmm.
391
00:15:45,913 --> 00:15:47,245
Um, okay.
392
00:15:47,247 --> 00:15:49,821
And this is the employee lounge.
393
00:15:49,823 --> 00:15:52,662
Your uniform: right in here.
394
00:15:52,664 --> 00:15:54,828
Let me know if you need
any help putting it on.
395
00:15:54,830 --> 00:15:55,911
Yeah.
396
00:15:55,913 --> 00:15:56,995
Hey, so what's the job?
397
00:15:56,997 --> 00:15:58,953
Busboy, uh, dishwasher?
398
00:15:58,955 --> 00:16:00,537
Street corner sign spinner.
399
00:16:00,539 --> 00:16:05,203
[hip-hop music]
400
00:16:05,205 --> 00:16:08,037
♪ We lookin' fresh when
we steppin' in the VIP ♪
401
00:16:08,039 --> 00:16:11,120
- ♪ Look at us, look at us ♪
- ♪ Everybody gonna notice we ♪
402
00:16:11,122 --> 00:16:13,579
♪ Dressed so fly like an F-16 ♪
403
00:16:13,581 --> 00:16:16,828
♪ They stare with they
mouth wide open, uh ♪
404
00:16:16,830 --> 00:16:19,454
♪ Close your mouth and
let me buy your drinks ♪
405
00:16:19,456 --> 00:16:21,870
♪ While I kick it with
this chick in pink ♪
406
00:16:21,872 --> 00:16:24,412
♪ She compliment me on my cufflinks ♪
407
00:16:24,414 --> 00:16:26,870
♪ I compliment her on
some other things ♪
408
00:16:26,872 --> 00:16:30,203
♪ Okay, where all my fresh, fly
people on the East Side? ♪
409
00:16:30,205 --> 00:16:32,786
♪ Where all my fresh, fly
people on the West Side? ♪
410
00:16:32,788 --> 00:16:35,203
♪ Where all my fresh, fly
people on the South Side? ♪
411
00:16:35,205 --> 00:16:38,037
♪ North Side, any side? ♪
412
00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:40,412
♪ I'm so fly, yo, they call me Aviator ♪
413
00:16:40,414 --> 00:16:43,037
♪ Plush with the finish on
my swag out the hangar ♪
414
00:16:43,039 --> 00:16:45,828
♪ Known for the hot
16s and the bangers ♪
415
00:16:45,830 --> 00:16:47,454
♪ Think I'm 'bout to
take that three-piece ♪
416
00:16:47,456 --> 00:16:48,554
♪ Off the hanger... ♪
417
00:16:48,556 --> 00:16:50,078
Hey, Franny.
418
00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:51,662
What is that?
419
00:16:51,664 --> 00:16:54,911
Careful. Here.
420
00:16:54,913 --> 00:16:57,203
- [Debbie straining]
- Hey.
421
00:16:57,205 --> 00:16:59,120
[retches]
422
00:16:59,122 --> 00:17:00,495
♪♪♪
423
00:17:00,497 --> 00:17:01,745
What's going on in here?
424
00:17:01,747 --> 00:17:04,668
[retches] Morning sickness.
425
00:17:04,670 --> 00:17:06,056
[Debbie] Snaking the tub.
426
00:17:06,058 --> 00:17:07,600
[grunts] I got it.
427
00:17:08,705 --> 00:17:10,370
That's disgusting!
428
00:17:10,372 --> 00:17:11,764
[retches]
429
00:17:11,766 --> 00:17:13,370
- Damn.
- [Ingrid] Oh.
430
00:17:13,372 --> 00:17:15,153
I should add "plumber"
to my welding résumé.
431
00:17:15,155 --> 00:17:16,995
All right, may I take a shower, please?
432
00:17:16,997 --> 00:17:19,162
Yeah.
433
00:17:19,164 --> 00:17:22,242
Hey, do you ever do those
things in the saver special?
434
00:17:22,244 --> 00:17:24,579
Check for carbon monoxide leaks
or clean the dryer vent?
435
00:17:24,581 --> 00:17:26,995
[scoffs] No. Too busy, you know,
436
00:17:26,997 --> 00:17:29,863
raising five kids and Frank.
437
00:17:29,865 --> 00:17:31,454
Well, make it quick in there.
438
00:17:31,456 --> 00:17:32,703
Make sure you clean up your
hair in the drain after.
439
00:17:32,705 --> 00:17:34,037
Yeah, all right.
440
00:17:34,039 --> 00:17:37,370
[rock music]
441
00:17:37,372 --> 00:17:38,825
Debs.
442
00:17:39,539 --> 00:17:41,212
Sorry I snapped at you.
443
00:17:41,832 --> 00:17:43,303
You're doing a good job.
444
00:17:43,305 --> 00:17:44,745
Thanks.
445
00:17:44,747 --> 00:17:45,911
Also, I'm working the lunch shift later,
446
00:17:45,913 --> 00:17:47,710
so I'll have money for you today.
447
00:17:47,712 --> 00:17:48,828
Good.
448
00:17:48,830 --> 00:17:53,828
♪♪♪
449
00:17:53,830 --> 00:17:57,120
Really helps my morning sickness.
450
00:17:57,122 --> 00:18:02,039
♪♪♪
451
00:18:04,414 --> 00:18:06,289
[Ingrid groans]
452
00:18:08,667 --> 00:18:12,078
So should we, like, hold
hands or something?
453
00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:14,641
I don't know. Your hands get all sweaty?
454
00:18:14,643 --> 00:18:17,329
They will now that you
asked me like that.
455
00:18:17,331 --> 00:18:18,953
Are you a top or bottom?
456
00:18:18,955 --> 00:18:20,412
- Bottom.
- Ah, see, me too.
457
00:18:20,414 --> 00:18:21,911
This will never work.
458
00:18:21,913 --> 00:18:23,581
It's all right. We're here anyway.
459
00:18:25,101 --> 00:18:26,370
A nursing home?
460
00:18:26,372 --> 00:18:28,454
Yeah. I volunteer here once a month.
461
00:18:28,456 --> 00:18:30,162
Come on, you can help me.
462
00:18:30,164 --> 00:18:31,995
Shit.
463
00:18:31,997 --> 00:18:34,164
Hey, are we gonna be
cleaning bedpans or...
464
00:18:35,623 --> 00:18:37,329
What up, bitches?
465
00:18:37,331 --> 00:18:39,870
Tami, Audrey got denture
cream in my hair.
466
00:18:39,872 --> 00:18:41,287
Aww, let me see that.
467
00:18:41,289 --> 00:18:42,745
I did not do that.
468
00:18:42,747 --> 00:18:44,786
Tomorrow you'll say you did do it.
469
00:18:44,788 --> 00:18:46,786
Make up your Alzheimer's-y mind.
470
00:18:46,788 --> 00:18:49,203
All right, ladies. Who's
at the bowls first?
471
00:18:49,205 --> 00:18:51,969
I've got an assistant today,
so we can do two at a time.
472
00:18:51,971 --> 00:18:54,082
- Me.
- Me too.
473
00:18:54,084 --> 00:18:55,663
- What are we doing?
- Washing their hair.
474
00:18:55,665 --> 00:18:56,926
We're washing their hair?
475
00:18:56,928 --> 00:18:58,124
Yeah. Watch out for that one.
476
00:18:58,126 --> 00:18:59,495
She's handsy, likes to grab a dick.
477
00:18:59,497 --> 00:19:01,742
Hey. You all set?
478
00:19:02,205 --> 00:19:03,370
Oh.
479
00:19:03,372 --> 00:19:06,412
[upbeat music]
480
00:19:06,414 --> 00:19:08,203
♪♪♪
481
00:19:08,205 --> 00:19:09,537
♪ Whoo ♪
482
00:19:09,539 --> 00:19:11,973
♪ I died when I was born ♪
483
00:19:11,975 --> 00:19:14,703
♪ I'm living through this nuclear age ♪
484
00:19:14,705 --> 00:19:16,287
♪ This money's running dry... ♪
485
00:19:16,289 --> 00:19:17,329
Hey.
486
00:19:17,331 --> 00:19:18,579
Hey. What's up, man?
487
00:19:18,581 --> 00:19:19,875
What are you doing?
488
00:19:19,877 --> 00:19:21,703
Giving Santiago more of an American look
489
00:19:21,705 --> 00:19:23,276
before we go to The Alibi.
490
00:19:23,317 --> 00:19:24,863
_
491
00:19:24,905 --> 00:19:26,204
_
492
00:19:26,206 --> 00:19:28,786
♪ Let's get that paper ♪
493
00:19:28,788 --> 00:19:30,703
♪ You're losing and I'm winning ♪
494
00:19:30,705 --> 00:19:32,312
♪ But who's keeping score... ♪
495
00:19:32,314 --> 00:19:34,157
_
496
00:19:34,243 --> 00:19:35,497
_
497
00:19:35,621 --> 00:19:37,037
_
498
00:19:37,135 --> 00:19:39,059
_
499
00:19:39,170 --> 00:19:40,287
_
500
00:19:40,289 --> 00:19:42,203
♪ Let's get that paper ♪
501
00:19:42,205 --> 00:19:43,870
[Liam] You're getting his sister too?
502
00:19:43,872 --> 00:19:45,579
Yeah. Foster people are gonna be
503
00:19:45,581 --> 00:19:47,495
dropping her off a little bit later.
504
00:19:47,497 --> 00:19:49,454
There you go.
505
00:19:49,456 --> 00:19:51,658
♪♪♪
506
00:19:51,660 --> 00:19:53,053
And the final touch.
507
00:19:53,055 --> 00:19:54,078
♪♪♪
508
00:19:54,080 --> 00:19:55,828
Huh?
509
00:19:55,830 --> 00:19:58,370
Oh. Okay.
510
00:19:58,372 --> 00:20:00,203
How's he look?
511
00:20:00,205 --> 00:20:01,767
Like a cheesy American.
512
00:20:01,769 --> 00:20:03,245
Nice.
513
00:20:03,247 --> 00:20:05,186
♪♪♪
514
00:20:05,188 --> 00:20:08,122
[strumming softly]
515
00:20:08,997 --> 00:20:11,078
So you got a lady friend back home?
516
00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:12,911
Mm, sure do.
517
00:20:12,913 --> 00:20:14,953
Jasmine Dawn.
518
00:20:14,955 --> 00:20:17,247
Except she kicked me
out three years ago.
519
00:20:19,056 --> 00:20:21,055
Strapping young man like you?
520
00:20:21,057 --> 00:20:22,495
Yeah, well, I had too many blackouts
521
00:20:22,497 --> 00:20:24,703
for her to deal with.
522
00:20:24,705 --> 00:20:26,870
But I become the Hobo Loco Man, though,
523
00:20:26,872 --> 00:20:28,995
she gotta take me back, right?
524
00:20:28,997 --> 00:20:31,287
As long as she'll settle for runner-up.
525
00:20:31,289 --> 00:20:32,706
Won't have to.
526
00:20:32,708 --> 00:20:34,607
You got loser written all over you.
527
00:20:35,281 --> 00:20:37,662
[Ryan] All right, good afternoon!
528
00:20:37,664 --> 00:20:39,662
- [crowd cheering]
- [Ryan] Yes, welcome.
529
00:20:39,664 --> 00:20:42,078
Thank you for entering our
Hobo Loco Man search...
530
00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:44,703
Or Hobo Loco Woman,
531
00:20:44,705 --> 00:20:47,203
of course. Yes, ladies.
532
00:20:47,205 --> 00:20:49,037
All right, we have reviewed
your applications,
533
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:50,652
and we're ready to announce
the 20 contestants.
534
00:20:50,654 --> 00:20:52,703
If your name is called,
please come on up
535
00:20:52,705 --> 00:20:54,537
to the Hobo Loco porch.
536
00:20:54,539 --> 00:20:56,786
Bethany Houseman!
537
00:20:56,788 --> 00:20:58,953
- There's Bethany!
- Hey, all right.
538
00:20:58,955 --> 00:21:00,350
Next up, Victor...
539
00:21:00,352 --> 00:21:02,825
"Nag-high."
540
00:21:02,827 --> 00:21:04,412
- Victor! My man.
- Yay!
541
00:21:04,414 --> 00:21:05,745
- All right.
- Next up:
542
00:21:05,747 --> 00:21:07,412
Frank Gallagher!
543
00:21:07,414 --> 00:21:09,245
[Ryan] Whoo! Yes! Where is he?
544
00:21:09,247 --> 00:21:10,287
- [Dax] Hey, there he is.
- [Ryan] That's Frank.
545
00:21:10,289 --> 00:21:11,828
[Dax] There he is!
546
00:21:11,830 --> 00:21:15,329
All right. Gloria Sweetland.
547
00:21:15,331 --> 00:21:16,277
[crowd cheering]
548
00:21:16,279 --> 00:21:18,017
Oh, she's got fans.
549
00:21:18,019 --> 00:21:19,703
[Ryan] Uh-oh.
550
00:21:19,705 --> 00:21:22,957
[Dax] Mikey O'Shea!
551
00:21:22,959 --> 00:21:24,245
- Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.
- Yeah.
552
00:21:24,247 --> 00:21:26,662
Yay!
553
00:21:26,664 --> 00:21:28,245
We got a competition now.
554
00:21:28,247 --> 00:21:29,911
- Yeah.
- Hola.
555
00:21:29,913 --> 00:21:32,579
[Dax] Next up, Mrs. O'Coin.
556
00:21:32,581 --> 00:21:34,537
[Ryan] Right. There she is.
557
00:21:34,539 --> 00:21:37,133
[crowd cheering]
558
00:21:37,135 --> 00:21:39,745
[music playing softly over speakers]
559
00:21:39,747 --> 00:21:41,870
Oh, hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
560
00:21:41,872 --> 00:21:44,454
No means no, Audrey, all right?
561
00:21:44,456 --> 00:21:45,952
There you go.
562
00:21:45,954 --> 00:21:47,495
♪♪♪
563
00:21:47,497 --> 00:21:48,786
So what boring stuff are you
564
00:21:48,788 --> 00:21:50,704
gonna have me do with you today?
565
00:21:51,811 --> 00:21:53,843
Uh, gotta buy a new phone charger,
566
00:21:53,845 --> 00:21:55,287
some socks,
567
00:21:55,289 --> 00:21:57,203
then go grocery shopping.
568
00:21:57,205 --> 00:21:58,831
Debs has us on rotation.
569
00:21:58,833 --> 00:22:00,120
It's my turn.
570
00:22:00,122 --> 00:22:02,463
I can help you get some healthy stuff.
571
00:22:02,465 --> 00:22:04,703
Do you know they actually
have produce aisles
572
00:22:04,705 --> 00:22:06,291
at the grocery store?
573
00:22:06,293 --> 00:22:08,203
Hmm, you don't say.
574
00:22:08,205 --> 00:22:10,142
♪♪♪
575
00:22:10,144 --> 00:22:12,995
[Audrey] This feels so good.
576
00:22:12,997 --> 00:22:14,537
It's been a long time since a boy's
577
00:22:14,539 --> 00:22:16,925
run his fingers through my hair.
578
00:22:16,927 --> 00:22:18,995
[Audrey moans]
579
00:22:18,997 --> 00:22:20,995
Hey, uh, how long you
been volunteering here?
580
00:22:20,997 --> 00:22:22,745
[Tami] Uh, since beauty school.
581
00:22:22,747 --> 00:22:24,786
My Grandma Peggy used to live here.
582
00:22:24,788 --> 00:22:26,620
Hmm? What'd you say?
583
00:22:26,622 --> 00:22:28,805
I wasn't talking to you, Broom Hilda.
584
00:22:29,581 --> 00:22:31,495
I was telling Lip about
my Grandma Peggy.
585
00:22:31,497 --> 00:22:33,059
The whore?
586
00:22:33,788 --> 00:22:36,735
She fucked your boyfriend
one time. Get over it.
587
00:22:36,737 --> 00:22:38,722
You know, that shit shouldn't
matter once you're past 75.
588
00:22:38,724 --> 00:22:39,953
I will never forget.
589
00:22:39,955 --> 00:22:41,866
Okay, well, that's good.
You hold on to that.
590
00:22:41,868 --> 00:22:43,359
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
591
00:22:43,361 --> 00:22:47,120
♪♪♪
592
00:22:47,122 --> 00:22:49,457
You're smiling at me in that way.
593
00:22:49,459 --> 00:22:50,495
♪♪♪
594
00:22:50,497 --> 00:22:52,049
What way?
595
00:22:52,051 --> 00:22:53,869
That you like me.
596
00:22:53,871 --> 00:22:55,703
Well, it's kind of hard
not to when you're
597
00:22:55,705 --> 00:22:57,329
putting rollers in some lady's hair
598
00:22:57,331 --> 00:22:58,914
on your day off.
599
00:22:59,891 --> 00:23:01,329
- Oh, whoa.
- Audrey, stop.
600
00:23:01,331 --> 00:23:03,703
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Leave him alone.
601
00:23:03,705 --> 00:23:05,331
That's my dick.
602
00:23:18,288 --> 00:23:20,995
[upbeat music playing over speakers]
603
00:23:20,997 --> 00:23:22,376
'Sup, small fry?
604
00:23:22,378 --> 00:23:23,822
Saw the sign in the window.
605
00:23:23,824 --> 00:23:25,537
"Help Wanted." I need a job.
606
00:23:25,539 --> 00:23:27,003
How old are you?
607
00:23:27,005 --> 00:23:28,010
Twenty-five.
608
00:23:28,012 --> 00:23:29,245
♪♪♪
609
00:23:29,247 --> 00:23:31,145
Yeah, come back when you're 31.
610
00:23:31,147 --> 00:23:32,703
Okay.
611
00:23:32,705 --> 00:23:35,896
♪♪♪
612
00:23:35,898 --> 00:23:38,485
What do you do with those
squeezed-out lemons?
613
00:23:38,487 --> 00:23:39,533
[Dax] Whoo!
614
00:23:39,535 --> 00:23:42,201
[all cheering]
615
00:23:46,289 --> 00:23:49,037
Okay, congratulations, hobos.
616
00:23:49,039 --> 00:23:50,203
For the next week, you'll be sleeping
617
00:23:50,205 --> 00:23:52,412
in this backyard and
be required to drink
618
00:23:52,414 --> 00:23:55,287
16 ounces of Hobo Loco daily.
619
00:23:55,289 --> 00:23:57,454
Each day, you'll be
given timed challenges.
620
00:23:57,456 --> 00:23:59,287
Those of you who fail
to complete the tasks
621
00:23:59,289 --> 00:24:01,162
will be eliminated.
622
00:24:01,164 --> 00:24:03,503
You'll also need to
create brand awareness.
623
00:24:03,505 --> 00:24:07,078
You each get a phone and
two quarts of Hobo Loco.
624
00:24:07,080 --> 00:24:08,995
Take lots of photos and videos
625
00:24:08,997 --> 00:24:11,330
of folks sampling your Hobo Loco.
626
00:24:11,332 --> 00:24:13,316
All right, who's ready
for the first challenge?
627
00:24:13,318 --> 00:24:15,410
- [all] Yeah!
- [Ryan] Yay.
628
00:24:15,412 --> 00:24:17,995
In the spirit of a true hobo,
each contestant will forage
629
00:24:17,997 --> 00:24:20,620
for their own bedding
to sleep on tonight.
630
00:24:20,622 --> 00:24:22,155
You will be judged
631
00:24:22,157 --> 00:24:25,294
on creativity and resourcefulness.
632
00:24:25,296 --> 00:24:28,162
- You have one hour.
- [button beeps]
633
00:24:28,164 --> 00:24:30,411
All right, let's go out
there, start hobo-ing!
634
00:24:30,413 --> 00:24:31,703
- [crowd yelling]
- [Ryan] Okay!
635
00:24:31,705 --> 00:24:33,329
- Frank!
- What are you doing?
636
00:24:33,331 --> 00:24:34,412
- Come on, Frank!
- Get off of me. No!
637
00:24:34,414 --> 00:24:36,316
Wait for me!
638
00:24:36,318 --> 00:24:37,911
[flatly] Argh, matey.
639
00:24:37,913 --> 00:24:40,315
Popcorn shrimp is back.
640
00:24:40,317 --> 00:24:41,329
[rock music]
641
00:24:41,331 --> 00:24:43,039
Fucking sh...
642
00:24:44,414 --> 00:24:46,745
Aye, aye, matey. Popcorn shrimp is back.
643
00:24:46,747 --> 00:24:49,703
[man] Hey, butt pirate, need
a soda with your shrimp?
644
00:24:49,705 --> 00:24:51,133
Fuck you, douchebag!
645
00:24:51,135 --> 00:24:52,537
[man laughs]
646
00:24:52,539 --> 00:24:54,278
Fuck.
647
00:24:55,039 --> 00:24:57,037
Aye, aye, matey.
648
00:24:57,039 --> 00:24:59,971
Popcorn shrimp. Fuck.
649
00:25:01,164 --> 00:25:03,203
When did we plant grass in here?
650
00:25:03,205 --> 00:25:05,662
- [Veronica] That's mold.
- [Kev] Ah, fuck.
651
00:25:05,664 --> 00:25:07,745
[Tommy] When'd you guys
suddenly get into cleaning?
652
00:25:07,747 --> 00:25:09,454
[Veronica] Makes Santiago happy.
653
00:25:09,456 --> 00:25:11,462
Yeah, we're doing stuff he likes.
654
00:25:12,955 --> 00:25:14,703
Hey, uh, Santiago said
655
00:25:14,705 --> 00:25:16,919
your girls are trying to murder him.
656
00:25:16,921 --> 00:25:18,245
What?
657
00:25:18,247 --> 00:25:19,627
Is that what they were
doing this morning?
658
00:25:19,629 --> 00:25:21,348
Wait, that's what they
were doing this morning?
659
00:25:21,350 --> 00:25:22,786
He called them las diablas...
660
00:25:22,788 --> 00:25:24,635
The devils.
661
00:25:24,637 --> 00:25:25,828
But he's okay with it,
because he doesn't want you
662
00:25:25,830 --> 00:25:27,162
to send him back.
663
00:25:27,164 --> 00:25:28,953
We're not gonna send him back.
664
00:25:28,955 --> 00:25:30,245
Why would the girls want to murder him?
665
00:25:30,247 --> 00:25:31,911
They're not trying to murder anyone.
666
00:25:31,913 --> 00:25:33,745
- They're just playing.
- Maybe they're jealous...
667
00:25:33,747 --> 00:25:35,412
Sibling rivalry.
668
00:25:35,414 --> 00:25:36,774
[Tommy] Maybe they're
just not into having
669
00:25:36,776 --> 00:25:38,287
some random brown dude who
doesn't speak English
670
00:25:38,289 --> 00:25:39,461
living in their house.
671
00:25:39,463 --> 00:25:41,703
- They're brown too.
- Different shade of brown.
672
00:25:41,705 --> 00:25:43,620
Oh, that's crazy.
673
00:25:43,622 --> 00:25:45,495
Just as crazy as white people,
who are actually pink,
674
00:25:45,497 --> 00:25:47,245
thinking all black people
are the same color.
675
00:25:47,247 --> 00:25:50,703
Well, what about brownish white
people, like some Italians
676
00:25:50,705 --> 00:25:52,745
or Portuguese or Spanish?
677
00:25:52,747 --> 00:25:54,665
They can be as brown as Santiago.
678
00:25:54,667 --> 00:25:56,144
They're European brown.
679
00:25:56,146 --> 00:25:57,786
All right, I'm lost. What
are you talking about?
680
00:25:57,788 --> 00:25:59,287
Okay, it's real simple. Your girls
681
00:25:59,289 --> 00:26:01,120
are a different brown than Santiago,
682
00:26:01,122 --> 00:26:02,412
so they want his different brown
683
00:26:02,414 --> 00:26:03,786
to go home where he belongs
684
00:26:03,788 --> 00:26:05,245
and leave their brown to get
685
00:26:05,247 --> 00:26:06,995
all the good stuff from America.
686
00:26:06,997 --> 00:26:08,245
Are you saying our girls are racist?
687
00:26:08,247 --> 00:26:09,745
He's saying Amy and Gemma
688
00:26:09,747 --> 00:26:11,828
don't understand what's going on.
689
00:26:11,830 --> 00:26:14,537
What if they want to murder
Martina when she shows up?
690
00:26:14,539 --> 00:26:16,120
No one's murdering anyone.
691
00:26:16,122 --> 00:26:18,434
- [Kermit] Who's Martina?
- Santiago's sister.
692
00:26:18,436 --> 00:26:19,786
If she's the same color brown as him,
693
00:26:19,788 --> 00:26:21,182
they're gonna want to murder her.
694
00:26:21,184 --> 00:26:22,995
Oh, shut up, Tommy.
It'd like Kermit said.
695
00:26:22,997 --> 00:26:24,287
They're just jealous.
696
00:26:24,289 --> 00:26:25,786
We're gonna talk to them after school
697
00:26:25,788 --> 00:26:26,995
and tell them there's plenty
of good stuff in America
698
00:26:26,997 --> 00:26:28,287
for all the brown people
699
00:26:28,289 --> 00:26:29,412
so they don't have to end up in jail
700
00:26:29,414 --> 00:26:31,162
for murdering the different brown people
701
00:26:31,164 --> 00:26:32,531
or something like that, right?
702
00:26:37,414 --> 00:26:39,450
Hey, I recognize you.
703
00:26:39,452 --> 00:26:40,995
You're that crazy lady's ex-husband.
704
00:26:40,997 --> 00:26:43,620
- Yeah. Is she here?
- Gallaghers don't snitch.
705
00:26:43,622 --> 00:26:45,786
I got a phone app that
says she's in there.
706
00:26:45,788 --> 00:26:47,828
Oh, okay.
707
00:26:47,830 --> 00:26:49,786
Make yourself useful and get the door.
708
00:26:49,788 --> 00:26:52,370
All right.
709
00:26:52,372 --> 00:26:54,454
There you go.
710
00:26:54,456 --> 00:26:56,620
[vacuum whirring]
711
00:26:56,622 --> 00:26:58,162
Cool if I look around?
712
00:26:58,164 --> 00:26:59,495
[Liam] Knock yourself out.
713
00:26:59,497 --> 00:27:00,830
Might be upstairs.
714
00:27:02,957 --> 00:27:04,287
- [Randy] Ingrid?
- You fall?
715
00:27:04,289 --> 00:27:05,786
- [Ingrid] No.
- [Randy] Ingrid!
716
00:27:05,788 --> 00:27:07,662
Just making sure my embryos stay in.
717
00:27:07,664 --> 00:27:08,911
[Randy] Where are you?
718
00:27:08,913 --> 00:27:10,245
I'm selling lemonade to make money
719
00:27:10,247 --> 00:27:11,927
so I can sleep indoors again.
720
00:27:11,929 --> 00:27:14,275
- [Randy] Ingrid?
- [Liam] What the hell are you doing?
721
00:27:14,277 --> 00:27:15,330
[Debbie] Vacuuming the lint
722
00:27:15,332 --> 00:27:17,245
out of the dryer vents
before they catch on fire.
723
00:27:17,247 --> 00:27:19,034
[Randy] Ingrid, where...
724
00:27:19,036 --> 00:27:20,454
Ingrid.
725
00:27:20,456 --> 00:27:22,537
Ingy.
726
00:27:22,539 --> 00:27:24,786
- What are you doing here?
- Dr. Kwan called me.
727
00:27:24,788 --> 00:27:26,037
She told me you were pregnant.
728
00:27:26,039 --> 00:27:27,454
That's wonderful.
729
00:27:27,456 --> 00:27:29,412
Wonderful?
730
00:27:29,414 --> 00:27:31,283
You never wanted me to have children
731
00:27:31,285 --> 00:27:32,828
because of my condition.
732
00:27:32,830 --> 00:27:34,586
[Randy] Well, now that you are pregnant,
733
00:27:34,588 --> 00:27:35,995
it's a beautiful miracle.
734
00:27:35,997 --> 00:27:38,703
- Let's do this together.
- What?
735
00:27:38,705 --> 00:27:40,577
They're not even yours.
736
00:27:40,579 --> 00:27:41,662
They're Frank's.
737
00:27:42,331 --> 00:27:44,495
Yes, but you just met him.
738
00:27:44,497 --> 00:27:46,604
You think he's really committed
to having more kids?
739
00:27:46,606 --> 00:27:48,620
[Ingrid] Yes. Yes.
740
00:27:48,622 --> 00:27:50,454
But I'm the one who's
always been there for you,
741
00:27:50,456 --> 00:27:51,953
and I always will,
742
00:27:51,955 --> 00:27:54,078
so let's get you back on your meds
743
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:56,480
and then we'll go for a
checkup with Dr. Kwan.
744
00:27:56,482 --> 00:27:58,745
You're trying to trick me.
745
00:27:58,747 --> 00:28:01,286
You're gonna get me on that exam table
746
00:28:01,288 --> 00:28:04,245
and then have Kwan just
suck the embryos out of me!
747
00:28:04,247 --> 00:28:06,454
No, I won't. I won't, I promise.
748
00:28:06,456 --> 00:28:09,703
We'll keep two. We'll have twins.
Wouldn't that be great? Twins?
749
00:28:09,705 --> 00:28:11,953
Bullshit.
750
00:28:11,955 --> 00:28:13,745
You don't want my babies.
751
00:28:13,747 --> 00:28:16,393
Frank does. Frank loves me.
752
00:28:16,395 --> 00:28:19,109
He loves all six of my embryos.
753
00:28:20,186 --> 00:28:22,454
I have a phone patient now,
754
00:28:22,456 --> 00:28:24,280
so please go.
755
00:28:26,081 --> 00:28:28,495
Okay, okay.
756
00:28:28,497 --> 00:28:29,581
[sighs]
757
00:28:30,645 --> 00:28:32,258
I'll check back in later.
758
00:28:39,337 --> 00:28:40,462
Hey, Debbie.
759
00:28:43,039 --> 00:28:44,537
Randy's wrong.
760
00:28:44,539 --> 00:28:47,402
Frank'll be committed to
my six babies, right?
761
00:28:47,404 --> 00:28:49,203
[scoffs] Not a chance.
762
00:28:49,205 --> 00:28:52,398
[rock music]
763
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:57,046
♪♪♪
764
00:28:58,955 --> 00:29:01,472
What are you on my ass for?
765
00:29:01,474 --> 00:29:03,710
Find your own bedding. This is my spot.
766
00:29:03,712 --> 00:29:05,620
I thought we could make a pact.
767
00:29:05,622 --> 00:29:07,329
Either one of us wins,
768
00:29:07,331 --> 00:29:09,953
we split the spokesman money, 50/50.
769
00:29:09,955 --> 00:29:12,417
You trying to hone in on my dough?
770
00:29:13,164 --> 00:29:15,961
Or am I trying to give
you half of mine, hmm?
771
00:29:15,963 --> 00:29:17,454
[scoffs]
772
00:29:17,456 --> 00:29:20,289
You're a crafty dude, Mikey O.
773
00:29:21,993 --> 00:29:24,243
I'm a lone wolf. Go.
774
00:29:25,872 --> 00:29:27,511
Suit yourself.
775
00:29:27,513 --> 00:29:29,078
- Suit yourself.
- Go!
776
00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:30,563
♪ Hey, man, don't you ♪
777
00:29:30,565 --> 00:29:32,863
♪ Don't you know ♪
778
00:29:32,865 --> 00:29:34,162
♪ Your mom don't care ♪
779
00:29:34,164 --> 00:29:35,620
♪ Hey, man... ♪
780
00:29:35,622 --> 00:29:36,995
Jackpot.
781
00:29:36,997 --> 00:29:38,162
♪♪♪
782
00:29:38,164 --> 00:29:40,579
♪ Forget what I said ♪
783
00:29:40,581 --> 00:29:43,620
[horn honking]
784
00:29:43,622 --> 00:29:45,579
[man] Hey, yo! What are
you doing in that truck?
785
00:29:45,581 --> 00:29:48,162
Get out of there!
786
00:29:48,164 --> 00:29:49,412
♪♪♪
787
00:29:49,414 --> 00:29:50,953
- [man] Hey!
- I-I'm, uh...
788
00:29:50,955 --> 00:29:52,662
[man] Get back here!
789
00:29:52,664 --> 00:29:54,786
Where the fuck do you
think you're going?
790
00:29:54,788 --> 00:29:57,495
♪♪♪
791
00:29:57,497 --> 00:29:58,903
[man] That's what you get!
792
00:29:58,905 --> 00:30:00,859
Serves you right, asshole!
793
00:30:01,920 --> 00:30:03,953
Yeah, you better keep running!
794
00:30:03,955 --> 00:30:05,206
[Frank groans]
795
00:30:09,454 --> 00:30:11,537
So was it weird buying
actual green things
796
00:30:11,539 --> 00:30:12,848
at the grocery store?
797
00:30:12,850 --> 00:30:14,414
Hey, I've bought green things before.
798
00:30:14,416 --> 00:30:16,870
Guacamole, Mountain Dew,
799
00:30:16,872 --> 00:30:18,818
Jell-O,
800
00:30:18,820 --> 00:30:20,537
mint chocolate chip ice cream.
801
00:30:20,539 --> 00:30:22,287
You gonna list every crappy green thing?
802
00:30:22,289 --> 00:30:23,995
Yeah, I can go on. Shamrock shakes.
803
00:30:23,997 --> 00:30:25,456
Green eggs and ham.
804
00:30:29,555 --> 00:30:31,133
Xan?
805
00:30:32,164 --> 00:30:34,122
I didn't know where else to go.
806
00:30:37,705 --> 00:30:39,285
Aye, matey!
807
00:30:39,287 --> 00:30:40,412
[engine rumbling]
808
00:30:40,414 --> 00:30:42,579
Popcorn shrimp is back.
809
00:30:42,581 --> 00:30:44,599
[music blaring over car stereo]
810
00:30:44,601 --> 00:30:47,703
Oh, my God. Check this out.
811
00:30:47,705 --> 00:30:49,055
Gallagher?
812
00:30:49,057 --> 00:30:51,414
Shit. What's up, Little Shins?
813
00:30:52,331 --> 00:30:54,246
What, you out here selling?
814
00:30:54,248 --> 00:30:55,373
Just popcorn shrimp.
815
00:30:55,375 --> 00:30:58,870
♪♪♪
816
00:30:58,872 --> 00:31:00,329
'Cause we took over this corner.
817
00:31:00,331 --> 00:31:02,153
I don't like no competition.
818
00:31:02,155 --> 00:31:04,412
Hey, you won't have any from me.
819
00:31:04,414 --> 00:31:05,911
So how do I know this whole
820
00:31:05,913 --> 00:31:07,509
gay pirate shit ain't some front?
821
00:31:07,511 --> 00:31:09,162
I've been out of the business for years.
822
00:31:09,164 --> 00:31:10,831
I'm just working at Captain Bob's now.
823
00:31:10,833 --> 00:31:12,995
♪♪♪
824
00:31:12,997 --> 00:31:16,454
I got trust issues, man. What can I say?
825
00:31:16,456 --> 00:31:19,291
I'm gonna have to shake your
Johnny Depp-looking ass down,
826
00:31:19,293 --> 00:31:22,870
- make sure you ain't got no stash.
- Yo, I swear to you, I don't.
827
00:31:22,872 --> 00:31:24,146
Shake him.
828
00:31:24,148 --> 00:31:26,703
Fuck. They're just shrimp!
829
00:31:26,705 --> 00:31:29,870
♪ Put 'em on the battlefields
where they're dead... ♪
830
00:31:29,872 --> 00:31:31,495
[Carl] Come on, put me
down, motherfucker!
831
00:31:31,497 --> 00:31:33,456
Watch the hat!
832
00:31:43,196 --> 00:31:44,236
So what happened?
833
00:31:44,238 --> 00:31:45,572
Xan, where's your mom?
834
00:31:46,383 --> 00:31:47,508
Don't know.
835
00:31:48,611 --> 00:31:50,077
Here.
836
00:31:50,079 --> 00:31:51,454
I'll make you something to eat.
837
00:31:51,456 --> 00:31:53,278
W-when's the last time you saw her?
838
00:31:54,039 --> 00:31:55,662
[Xan] She went to get pizza.
839
00:31:55,664 --> 00:31:57,707
I waited in the motel.
840
00:31:57,709 --> 00:31:59,810
Watched TV and stuff.
841
00:31:59,812 --> 00:32:01,032
What, and she never came back?
842
00:32:03,695 --> 00:32:06,495
[somber music]
843
00:32:06,497 --> 00:32:07,745
♪♪♪
844
00:32:07,747 --> 00:32:09,037
Here you go.
845
00:32:09,039 --> 00:32:12,203
♪♪♪
846
00:32:12,205 --> 00:32:13,879
Motel guy kicked me out.
847
00:32:13,881 --> 00:32:15,245
When did this happen?
848
00:32:15,247 --> 00:32:16,687
Couple days ago.
849
00:32:17,567 --> 00:32:19,498
Where have you been since then, Xan?
850
00:32:20,789 --> 00:32:22,868
Sometimes my mom works
at this truck stop.
851
00:32:22,870 --> 00:32:24,412
I just hung out there.
852
00:32:24,414 --> 00:32:26,162
A truck stop?
853
00:32:26,164 --> 00:32:27,985
There's a bunch of guys there, but...
854
00:32:29,039 --> 00:32:30,670
my mom never showed up.
855
00:32:30,672 --> 00:32:32,329
Wait, wait, wait, a bunch of guys?
856
00:32:32,331 --> 00:32:33,852
W-what does that mean?
They fucking touch you?
857
00:32:33,854 --> 00:32:35,244
- [Tami] Chill out.
- No, I'm not gonna chill
858
00:32:35,246 --> 00:32:36,831
the fuck out. Her mother
ditched her again!
859
00:32:36,833 --> 00:32:38,861
Okay, well, you are scaring her.
860
00:32:39,913 --> 00:32:41,740
I'll give her a bath. I'll talk to her.
861
00:32:41,742 --> 00:32:43,370
I'll find out if anything happened.
862
00:32:43,372 --> 00:32:44,530
Okay?
863
00:32:45,414 --> 00:32:46,657
Okay.
864
00:32:47,927 --> 00:32:52,162
♪♪♪
865
00:32:52,164 --> 00:32:53,323
It's okay.
866
00:32:54,250 --> 00:32:55,474
I'm sorry, Xan.
867
00:32:55,476 --> 00:33:00,919
♪♪♪
868
00:33:00,921 --> 00:33:02,370
[Todd] Lemonade!
869
00:33:02,372 --> 00:33:04,370
Lemonade! Get your fresh lemonade!
870
00:33:04,372 --> 00:33:06,872
[Liam] Come get your lemonade.
871
00:33:10,872 --> 00:33:13,675
Let me have one for each one of my guys.
872
00:33:13,677 --> 00:33:15,705
That'll be five bucks.
873
00:33:17,247 --> 00:33:18,579
Keep the change.
874
00:33:18,581 --> 00:33:20,287
- [horn honks]
- Thanks.
875
00:33:20,289 --> 00:33:22,789
[truck doors close, engine turns over]
876
00:33:24,664 --> 00:33:27,870
[music playing over car stereo]
877
00:33:27,872 --> 00:33:29,828
How long are you guys gonna be out here?
878
00:33:29,830 --> 00:33:31,370
I don't know. A while.
879
00:33:31,372 --> 00:33:33,203
♪ I love who you are ♪
880
00:33:33,205 --> 00:33:35,579
♪♪♪
881
00:33:35,581 --> 00:33:38,579
♪ I love who you are ♪
882
00:33:38,581 --> 00:33:41,412
♪♪♪
883
00:33:41,414 --> 00:33:42,995
You're blocking my driveway.
884
00:33:42,997 --> 00:33:46,247
♪ Who you are ♪
885
00:33:47,373 --> 00:33:50,081
Lemonade! Get your fresh lemonade!
886
00:33:54,331 --> 00:33:55,498
[car beeps]
887
00:33:58,081 --> 00:33:59,786
Jesus.
888
00:33:59,788 --> 00:34:00,747
Want some lemonade?
889
00:34:05,835 --> 00:34:08,662
[country music playing over speakers]
890
00:34:08,664 --> 00:34:10,287
♪♪♪
891
00:34:10,289 --> 00:34:11,703
Just a Sprite.
892
00:34:11,705 --> 00:34:13,537
Last night fucked with me.
893
00:34:13,539 --> 00:34:15,037
Got a whole new attitude.
894
00:34:15,039 --> 00:34:16,911
- Great.
- Ah, perfect.
895
00:34:16,913 --> 00:34:19,412
Uh, Tina, I got table 41's food for you.
896
00:34:19,414 --> 00:34:20,703
Yeah, okay.
897
00:34:20,705 --> 00:34:23,662
Grilled ham and cheese... for you,
898
00:34:23,664 --> 00:34:25,620
and the tacos must be for you.
899
00:34:25,622 --> 00:34:28,537
- Enjoy.
- Yes. Thank you.
900
00:34:28,539 --> 00:34:29,828
- Margo.
- Good afternoon.
901
00:34:29,830 --> 00:34:31,287
What brings you here?
902
00:34:31,289 --> 00:34:33,746
Police got a 911 call last night
903
00:34:33,748 --> 00:34:35,789
about a possible robbery.
904
00:34:37,705 --> 00:34:39,495
A frantic woman called,
saying that three men
905
00:34:39,497 --> 00:34:41,178
were threatening her,
906
00:34:41,180 --> 00:34:43,329
and she said they left
but she was afraid
907
00:34:43,331 --> 00:34:44,874
they were gonna come back.
908
00:34:45,705 --> 00:34:48,487
And when the police arrived,
the restaurant was closed,
909
00:34:48,489 --> 00:34:52,665
which is interesting, since
we're open 24 hours.
910
00:34:52,667 --> 00:34:54,277
Maybe they had the wrong address.
911
00:34:54,279 --> 00:34:55,432
Stop.
912
00:34:57,414 --> 00:34:58,745
I don't want your lies,
913
00:34:58,747 --> 00:35:00,509
and you smell like booze.
914
00:35:00,511 --> 00:35:02,828
I don't know if you're drunk now
915
00:35:02,830 --> 00:35:04,412
or if you just drank so much last night
916
00:35:04,414 --> 00:35:05,911
that it's just coming out of your pores.
917
00:35:05,913 --> 00:35:07,501
No, I'm sober.
918
00:35:07,503 --> 00:35:08,895
You're fired.
919
00:35:08,897 --> 00:35:10,453
What?
920
00:35:11,289 --> 00:35:13,162
Well, why?
921
00:35:13,164 --> 00:35:15,370
I-I haven't had a drink today, I swear.
922
00:35:15,372 --> 00:35:16,786
I've been getting calls
for the past month,
923
00:35:16,788 --> 00:35:19,911
from customers and
vendors and employees,
924
00:35:19,913 --> 00:35:22,979
saying that you had
been drunk on the job
925
00:35:22,981 --> 00:35:25,662
or asleep on the job
or angry on the job.
926
00:35:25,664 --> 00:35:27,703
Please don't fire me. Please.
927
00:35:27,705 --> 00:35:29,662
I-I've had a rough couple months,
928
00:35:29,664 --> 00:35:31,995
but-but I've turned a corner.
929
00:35:31,997 --> 00:35:33,828
People who say they've
"turned a corner"...
930
00:35:33,830 --> 00:35:35,537
They haven't turned a corner.
931
00:35:35,539 --> 00:35:37,826
They're just trying to
convince everyone they have.
932
00:35:38,872 --> 00:35:40,537
Please give me another chance.
933
00:35:40,539 --> 00:35:42,499
I promise I'll straighten out.
934
00:35:42,955 --> 00:35:44,162
Good.
935
00:35:44,164 --> 00:35:45,370
- You should.
- Yes.
936
00:35:45,372 --> 00:35:46,811
But not on my watch.
937
00:35:47,997 --> 00:35:49,690
You're acting manager now,
938
00:35:49,692 --> 00:35:52,632
so you make sure she cleans
her things up and leaves.
939
00:35:52,634 --> 00:35:56,004
♪♪♪
940
00:35:56,991 --> 00:35:59,287
[scoffs]
941
00:35:59,289 --> 00:36:01,194
Fuck all of you.
942
00:36:01,894 --> 00:36:03,911
Ratting me out.
943
00:36:03,913 --> 00:36:05,786
[laughs]
944
00:36:05,788 --> 00:36:08,703
If it weren't for me, none
of you NA motherfuckers
945
00:36:08,705 --> 00:36:11,161
would even have a job. Mm-hmm.
946
00:36:11,163 --> 00:36:13,620
I wanted to fire you because you suck,
947
00:36:13,622 --> 00:36:14,995
but you called me, crying
948
00:36:14,997 --> 00:36:16,786
about your mother and her medical bills,
949
00:36:16,788 --> 00:36:18,755
and I let you keep your fucking job.
950
00:36:18,757 --> 00:36:19,828
[Eliza] Fiona, I think we should just...
951
00:36:19,830 --> 00:36:21,832
Shut the fuck up, Eliza.
952
00:36:21,834 --> 00:36:23,914
[laughs] I'm leaving.
953
00:36:25,122 --> 00:36:27,114
Oh, and guess what.
954
00:36:27,116 --> 00:36:30,120
The cook rubbed his dick
on all of your meals.
955
00:36:30,122 --> 00:36:31,914
Yeah, enjoy.
956
00:36:33,247 --> 00:36:34,786
[silverware clattering]
957
00:36:34,788 --> 00:36:36,412
[man] Can I get the check, please?
958
00:36:36,414 --> 00:36:38,537
Fuck this, matey.
959
00:36:38,539 --> 00:36:42,745
[upbeat music playing over speakers]
960
00:36:42,747 --> 00:36:44,412
[Lori] What happened to you?
961
00:36:44,414 --> 00:36:46,287
I got beat up, shoes thrown at me,
962
00:36:46,289 --> 00:36:48,454
I don't even know how many
milk shakes and beers.
963
00:36:48,456 --> 00:36:50,786
[sighs] You poor baby.
964
00:36:50,788 --> 00:36:53,247
Come here. Come here.
965
00:36:55,539 --> 00:36:57,870
Um, yeah, I don't think
it's the best idea
966
00:36:57,872 --> 00:36:59,786
to be spinning signs out there.
967
00:36:59,788 --> 00:37:01,276
Got any other jobs in here?
968
00:37:01,705 --> 00:37:03,370
Are you kidding me?
969
00:37:03,372 --> 00:37:05,786
I got a folder full of
applicants wanting jobs:
970
00:37:05,788 --> 00:37:07,514
people with master's degrees,
971
00:37:07,516 --> 00:37:09,287
anthropologists and English majors
972
00:37:09,289 --> 00:37:11,245
and useless things like that.
973
00:37:11,247 --> 00:37:12,786
Wow. Oh, okay.
974
00:37:12,788 --> 00:37:15,194
Besides, you did a great
job out there today.
975
00:37:15,196 --> 00:37:17,370
Sales are up 20%.
976
00:37:17,372 --> 00:37:20,166
I'm ordering more popcorn
shrimp as we speak.
977
00:37:20,913 --> 00:37:23,405
So you'll be back tomorrow, right?
978
00:37:23,407 --> 00:37:26,031
Uh, yeah. Sure.
979
00:37:26,033 --> 00:37:27,412
Yeah.
980
00:37:27,414 --> 00:37:28,453
Yeah.
981
00:37:31,158 --> 00:37:33,844
Sweetie pies, why were you
hitting Santiago this morning?
982
00:37:33,846 --> 00:37:35,551
'Cause we don't like him.
983
00:37:35,553 --> 00:37:37,790
Why? Santiago's a good guy.
984
00:37:37,792 --> 00:37:38,874
He leaves now?
985
00:37:38,876 --> 00:37:40,891
No, baby, he doesn't leave now.
986
00:37:40,893 --> 00:37:42,100
He's staying here with us.
987
00:37:42,102 --> 00:37:43,797
He's our family.
988
00:37:47,289 --> 00:37:48,825
Oh, fuck.
989
00:37:48,827 --> 00:37:51,051
Girls, is this because Santiago's
990
00:37:51,053 --> 00:37:52,645
a different shade of brown than you?
991
00:37:53,456 --> 00:37:56,745
Or, girls, is this because
you're jealous of Santiago?
992
00:37:56,747 --> 00:37:58,412
[Veronica] We need to treat people
993
00:37:58,414 --> 00:37:59,828
how we want to be treated.
994
00:37:59,830 --> 00:38:01,329
There are people in this world
995
00:38:01,331 --> 00:38:04,153
who want to send brown people
like us back to Africa,
996
00:38:04,155 --> 00:38:05,835
but we won't stand for it, will we?
997
00:38:05,837 --> 00:38:08,380
No. So we also won't stand
998
00:38:08,382 --> 00:38:10,412
for them wanting to send
other kinds of brown people
999
00:38:10,414 --> 00:38:12,412
back to Central America.
1000
00:38:12,414 --> 00:38:13,575
Get it?
1001
00:38:14,955 --> 00:38:17,824
Let me try. Uh, snookums,
1002
00:38:17,826 --> 00:38:19,703
I used to have sibling rivalry
1003
00:38:19,705 --> 00:38:22,272
with the kids in my foster homes, okay?
1004
00:38:22,274 --> 00:38:24,370
Especially this one boy, Joey Caccitore.
1005
00:38:24,372 --> 00:38:26,287
He used to kiss up to my foster parents
1006
00:38:26,289 --> 00:38:28,078
all the time, and they would give him
1007
00:38:28,080 --> 00:38:29,807
extra butterscotch pudding,
1008
00:38:29,809 --> 00:38:32,100
and I thought that they loved him more,
1009
00:38:32,102 --> 00:38:33,703
but in reality,
1010
00:38:33,705 --> 00:38:35,995
they just hated all of us.
1011
00:38:35,997 --> 00:38:38,105
- Kev, how is that helping?
- I don't know.
1012
00:38:38,107 --> 00:38:39,953
I forget that's how the story ended.
1013
00:38:39,955 --> 00:38:41,745
- [knock at door]
- I'll get it.
1014
00:38:41,747 --> 00:38:43,044
Talk about the brown people more.
1015
00:38:43,046 --> 00:38:44,247
I think that was helping.
1016
00:38:44,872 --> 00:38:47,329
Just because Santiago's here
doesn't mean we love you less,
1017
00:38:47,331 --> 00:38:49,162
and just because he's different
1018
00:38:49,164 --> 00:38:50,620
doesn't mean that we're
gonna get rid of him.
1019
00:38:50,622 --> 00:38:51,995
- [Kev] V.
- Yeah?
1020
00:38:51,997 --> 00:38:54,078
- [Kev] Look who it is.
- Hi.
1021
00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:55,328
[Santiago] Martina!
1022
00:38:55,330 --> 00:38:56,391
[Martina] Santiago!
1023
00:38:57,206 --> 00:38:59,329
[rock music]
1024
00:38:59,331 --> 00:39:00,662
[laughs]
1025
00:39:00,664 --> 00:39:05,872
♪♪♪
1026
00:39:10,289 --> 00:39:12,027
[Dax] Only 30 seconds left.
1027
00:39:12,029 --> 00:39:13,607
What the hell was that?
1028
00:39:13,609 --> 00:39:15,828
Smacking me with a two
by four out there?
1029
00:39:15,830 --> 00:39:17,620
That's the way we're
gonna play this thing?
1030
00:39:17,622 --> 00:39:20,821
All's fair in love and hobo wars, Frank.
1031
00:39:20,823 --> 00:39:21,953
♪♪♪
1032
00:39:21,955 --> 00:39:24,203
Gauntlet thrown, my friend.
1033
00:39:24,205 --> 00:39:28,245
♪♪♪
1034
00:39:28,247 --> 00:39:30,162
[Ryan] Just got off the
phone with the client.
1035
00:39:30,164 --> 00:39:32,037
Four Greek councils have signed deals
1036
00:39:32,039 --> 00:39:33,870
to make Hobo Loco their
featured alcoholic beverage
1037
00:39:33,872 --> 00:39:35,537
at all their fraternity parties.
1038
00:39:35,539 --> 00:39:36,884
- We're blowing up.
- Mm-hmm.
1039
00:39:36,886 --> 00:39:38,911
The Insta' Story I just
posted less than an hour ago
1040
00:39:38,913 --> 00:39:40,479
already has 100,000 viewers.
1041
00:39:40,481 --> 00:39:43,537
- [Ryan laughs]
- [buzzer blares]
1042
00:39:43,539 --> 00:39:45,263
Oh, sorry, Victor.
1043
00:39:45,265 --> 00:39:47,043
You've been eliminated.
1044
00:39:47,045 --> 00:39:48,454
And then there were 19.
1045
00:39:48,456 --> 00:39:50,071
Cardboard amateur.
1046
00:39:50,073 --> 00:39:51,620
Bubble wrap.
1047
00:39:51,622 --> 00:39:52,992
Nice touch, Frank.
1048
00:39:52,994 --> 00:39:55,120
♪♪♪
1049
00:39:55,122 --> 00:39:58,245
Ooh, but not as clever
as insulation and tarp!
1050
00:39:58,247 --> 00:39:59,995
- [Ryan] Ha!
- [Dax] You are the winner
1051
00:39:59,997 --> 00:40:01,870
- of this challenge, Mikey O.
- [Ryan] Yeah!
1052
00:40:01,872 --> 00:40:04,203
[Ryan and Dax cheering]
1053
00:40:04,205 --> 00:40:05,287
[Ryan] All right, let's get out there
1054
00:40:05,289 --> 00:40:07,370
for our next challenge:
1055
00:40:07,372 --> 00:40:09,995
dumpster diving for your dinner.
1056
00:40:09,997 --> 00:40:12,370
Who thinks they can bring
back the best meal?
1057
00:40:12,372 --> 00:40:14,037
- I can!
- Well, let's see!
1058
00:40:14,039 --> 00:40:15,703
- [button beeps]
- Whoo! Go! Go! Go!
1059
00:40:15,705 --> 00:40:17,412
- Whoo!
- [Dax] One hour! Let's go!
1060
00:40:17,414 --> 00:40:19,537
Don't forget to share your Hobo Loco
1061
00:40:19,539 --> 00:40:21,495
on social media!
1062
00:40:21,497 --> 00:40:23,786
♪♪♪
1063
00:40:23,788 --> 00:40:25,392
We're gonna make the American hobo
1064
00:40:25,394 --> 00:40:27,314
as famous as Joe Camel.
1065
00:40:48,768 --> 00:40:50,351
You did good, coming here.
1066
00:40:51,189 --> 00:40:52,957
You know, Lip's a smart guy.
1067
00:40:53,531 --> 00:40:54,702
I like him.
1068
00:40:55,424 --> 00:40:56,938
He'll figure this out.
1069
00:40:58,405 --> 00:40:59,745
Yeah.
1070
00:40:59,747 --> 00:41:02,155
But you can't be hanging
out at truck stops, right?
1071
00:41:02,157 --> 00:41:04,002
It's a lot of creepy people out there.
1072
00:41:05,976 --> 00:41:07,302
Look, if I saw...
1073
00:41:08,269 --> 00:41:10,454
If I saw a little girl
on the street alone,
1074
00:41:10,456 --> 00:41:12,136
I would want to protect her,
1075
00:41:12,787 --> 00:41:14,289
make sure she was safe,
1076
00:41:15,164 --> 00:41:16,703
but there are some bad people out there
1077
00:41:16,705 --> 00:41:18,101
who'd want to hurt her,
1078
00:41:18,668 --> 00:41:20,086
maybe say stuff
1079
00:41:20,587 --> 00:41:22,005
or do stuff to her.
1080
00:41:23,234 --> 00:41:24,996
If that ever happened,
1081
00:41:24,998 --> 00:41:26,607
you can tell me about it.
1082
00:41:28,322 --> 00:41:31,312
Hey, I'd listen to
anything you have to say,
1083
00:41:31,314 --> 00:41:32,995
try and make you feel better,
1084
00:41:32,997 --> 00:41:35,431
or maybe even beat the
shit out of that person.
1085
00:41:35,433 --> 00:41:36,539
I don't know.
1086
00:41:39,705 --> 00:41:40,995
Come on.
1087
00:41:40,997 --> 00:41:42,078
Let's go raid Lip's closet
1088
00:41:42,080 --> 00:41:43,329
and find you something clean to wear.
1089
00:41:43,331 --> 00:41:44,765
[rock music]
1090
00:41:44,767 --> 00:41:46,370
[Ingrid] No, Sally, I didn't say
1091
00:41:46,372 --> 00:41:48,995
that you were responsible
for Lou not remembering
1092
00:41:48,997 --> 00:41:50,416
your birthday.
1093
00:41:50,418 --> 00:41:52,995
I said you were responsible
1094
00:41:52,997 --> 00:41:54,287
for the way you reacted
1095
00:41:54,289 --> 00:41:56,195
to Lou not remembering your birthday.
1096
00:41:56,197 --> 00:41:58,745
Guess who just got fucking fired!
1097
00:41:58,747 --> 00:42:00,353
[shushing]
1098
00:42:00,355 --> 00:42:02,313
Are you shushing me in my own house?
1099
00:42:02,315 --> 00:42:03,620
She's doing a phone therapy session
1100
00:42:03,622 --> 00:42:05,120
with her client Sally.
1101
00:42:05,122 --> 00:42:07,220
[Fiona] Oh. Hey, Sally.
1102
00:42:07,222 --> 00:42:10,412
Sally, I got all the therapy you
could ever need right here!
1103
00:42:10,414 --> 00:42:11,911
- [Ingrid] Sorry, Sally...
- What happened?
1104
00:42:11,913 --> 00:42:13,499
Why'd you get fired?
1105
00:42:13,501 --> 00:42:15,537
Bullshit this, bullshit that,
1106
00:42:15,539 --> 00:42:17,331
blah, blah, blah.
1107
00:42:18,206 --> 00:42:19,662
So what's your plan now?
1108
00:42:19,664 --> 00:42:21,517
Gonna hang around here,
drinking all day?
1109
00:42:22,747 --> 00:42:24,987
Oh, no, I-I might eat something too.
1110
00:42:25,712 --> 00:42:26,805
What about money?
1111
00:42:27,581 --> 00:42:30,120
Could you stop whining about
money for two seconds, maybe?
1112
00:42:30,122 --> 00:42:33,953
♪♪♪
1113
00:42:33,955 --> 00:42:37,162
Brought some popcorn shrimp
back from my shitty-ass job.
1114
00:42:37,164 --> 00:42:39,370
- [Fiona] Yum.
- I'm turning the furnace on.
1115
00:42:39,372 --> 00:42:41,347
Gotta check for carbon monoxide leaks.
1116
00:42:41,349 --> 00:42:43,786
[sighs]
1117
00:42:43,788 --> 00:42:45,943
You need a job, Fiona.
1118
00:42:45,945 --> 00:42:47,620
Mm-hmm.
1119
00:42:47,622 --> 00:42:52,539
♪♪♪
1120
00:42:56,914 --> 00:42:58,373
[detector beeps]
1121
00:42:59,039 --> 00:43:00,995
What the hell?
1122
00:43:00,997 --> 00:43:06,037
♪♪♪
1123
00:43:06,039 --> 00:43:07,456
[detector beeps]
1124
00:43:08,581 --> 00:43:09,955
[detector beeps]
1125
00:43:10,997 --> 00:43:12,373
[detector beeps]
1126
00:43:13,664 --> 00:43:14,914
[detector beeps]
1127
00:43:15,872 --> 00:43:18,995
[detector beeping]
1128
00:43:18,997 --> 00:43:22,995
♪♪♪
1129
00:43:22,997 --> 00:43:26,245
[detector beeping]
1130
00:43:26,247 --> 00:43:28,162
- [gas hissing]
- No! Shit!
1131
00:43:28,164 --> 00:43:29,953
[detector beeping rapidly]
1132
00:43:29,955 --> 00:43:31,620
Come on.
1133
00:43:31,622 --> 00:43:33,329
[beeping continues]
1134
00:43:33,331 --> 00:43:36,078
- [beeping stops]
- [gas hissing]
1135
00:43:36,080 --> 00:43:37,662
[fabric rips]
1136
00:43:37,664 --> 00:43:38,620
Fuck.
1137
00:43:38,622 --> 00:43:39,995
Help!
1138
00:43:39,997 --> 00:43:41,573
I'm stuck down here!
1139
00:43:41,575 --> 00:43:43,995
[Fiona] I'm coming. I'm coming.
1140
00:43:43,997 --> 00:43:45,412
[knocking]
1141
00:43:45,414 --> 00:43:47,380
I said I'm coming!
1142
00:43:47,382 --> 00:43:48,870
So, uh, what I'm hearing you say, Sally,
1143
00:43:48,872 --> 00:43:51,272
is that even though
you're still mad at Lou,
1144
00:43:51,274 --> 00:43:53,786
you are willing to focus on
the good things he does.
1145
00:43:53,788 --> 00:43:56,493
Sally, your therapist
is having a tea party
1146
00:43:56,495 --> 00:43:57,828
- with stuffed animals.
- [knocking]
1147
00:43:57,830 --> 00:43:59,662
Door's open.
1148
00:43:59,664 --> 00:44:00,995
Yeah?
1149
00:44:00,997 --> 00:44:02,454
We're looking for Ingrid.
1150
00:44:02,456 --> 00:44:04,412
I'm her ex-husband. This is Dr. Kwan...
1151
00:44:04,414 --> 00:44:06,571
Oh, I don't give a fuck who
you are. She's right here.
1152
00:44:09,373 --> 00:44:10,537
[Ingrid] Yeah, you know, Sally,
1153
00:44:10,539 --> 00:44:12,037
we will have to continue this later
1154
00:44:12,039 --> 00:44:13,830
same time next week.
1155
00:44:17,498 --> 00:44:20,203
I cannot believe that you betrayed me
1156
00:44:20,205 --> 00:44:21,828
and brought her here.
1157
00:44:21,830 --> 00:44:23,784
[Randy] Ingrid, Dr. Kwan explained to me
1158
00:44:23,786 --> 00:44:25,662
that you will bleed out and die
1159
00:44:25,664 --> 00:44:27,657
if you carry six babies to term.
1160
00:44:27,659 --> 00:44:30,370
Then why did you implant
all those embryos in me?
1161
00:44:30,372 --> 00:44:31,911
Because there was only
a five percent chance
1162
00:44:31,913 --> 00:44:33,870
of any of them surviving implantation
1163
00:44:33,872 --> 00:44:35,645
in your shriveled-up uterus.
1164
00:44:35,647 --> 00:44:38,007
So what you're saying is,
I'm a medical miracle?
1165
00:44:38,009 --> 00:44:39,537
You'll be a medical tragedy
1166
00:44:39,539 --> 00:44:41,612
if you carry all six of
those fetuses to term.
1167
00:44:41,614 --> 00:44:43,703
I am willing to take my chances.
1168
00:44:43,705 --> 00:44:45,162
Ingrid, we are gonna go
to Dr. Kwan's office.
1169
00:44:45,164 --> 00:44:46,469
- No.
- She is gonna do
1170
00:44:46,471 --> 00:44:47,828
- the procedure, and then...
- No, no, no, no.
1171
00:44:47,830 --> 00:44:49,078
...I will take you home.
1172
00:44:49,080 --> 00:44:50,505
No! Get out of my house!
1173
00:44:50,507 --> 00:44:52,953
Bitch, if you don't come
to my office right now,
1174
00:44:52,955 --> 00:44:55,440
I will go North Korean on you
and reach into your vagina
1175
00:44:55,442 --> 00:44:57,911
and rip those embryos out
of you with my bare hands!
1176
00:44:57,913 --> 00:44:59,953
- [both shouting]
- Doctor, please!
1177
00:44:59,955 --> 00:45:01,995
She is trying to kill my babies!
1178
00:45:01,997 --> 00:45:03,911
[grunts exasperatedly]
1179
00:45:03,913 --> 00:45:05,911
[Randy] Ingrid?
1180
00:45:05,913 --> 00:45:07,078
[rock music]
1181
00:45:07,080 --> 00:45:08,870
Ingrid? Oh, crap.
1182
00:45:08,872 --> 00:45:10,434
- Ingy.
- [laughing]
1183
00:45:12,164 --> 00:45:14,745
[Randy] Ingrid? Open this door!
1184
00:45:14,747 --> 00:45:16,220
- Please.
- [Debbie] Hello?
1185
00:45:16,222 --> 00:45:17,565
- Is somebody down here?
- [Randy] Please!
1186
00:45:17,567 --> 00:45:19,454
- [Debbie] I'm trapped!
- [Randy] Ingrid.
1187
00:45:19,456 --> 00:45:22,106
Well, we all feel trapped at some point.
1188
00:45:22,108 --> 00:45:23,786
Uh, do you want to talk about it?
1189
00:45:23,788 --> 00:45:26,620
No, you crazy bitch! It's Debbie!
1190
00:45:26,622 --> 00:45:29,162
I need to get out of here
and turn off the gas
1191
00:45:29,164 --> 00:45:30,579
before the house blows up!
1192
00:45:30,581 --> 00:45:31,878
Debbie?
1193
00:45:32,760 --> 00:45:33,896
Debbie?
1194
00:45:33,898 --> 00:45:34,911
Help!
1195
00:45:34,913 --> 00:45:36,473
Help!
1196
00:45:37,039 --> 00:45:38,703
Somebody help!
1197
00:45:38,705 --> 00:45:39,953
Debbie?
1198
00:45:39,955 --> 00:45:40,911
Kelly?
1199
00:45:40,913 --> 00:45:44,786
♪♪♪
1200
00:45:44,788 --> 00:45:46,364
My pants are stuck.
1201
00:45:46,366 --> 00:45:47,620
[Kelly] Can you take them off?
1202
00:45:47,622 --> 00:45:48,890
What?
1203
00:45:48,892 --> 00:45:51,120
Just take off your pants!
1204
00:45:51,122 --> 00:45:53,162
Oh.
1205
00:45:53,164 --> 00:45:55,953
[gas hissing]
1206
00:45:55,955 --> 00:45:57,539
Uh...
1207
00:45:59,139 --> 00:46:02,096
[grunting]
1208
00:46:02,098 --> 00:46:04,181
[grunts, pants]
1209
00:46:08,664 --> 00:46:09,953
- Oh, my God.
- [laughs]
1210
00:46:09,955 --> 00:46:11,579
[sighs]
1211
00:46:11,581 --> 00:46:14,329
[laughs, sighs]
1212
00:46:14,331 --> 00:46:16,472
- [energetic rock music]
- Nice ass.
1213
00:46:16,474 --> 00:46:18,579
[laughs]
1214
00:46:18,581 --> 00:46:19,953
Let's get that gas turned off.
1215
00:46:19,955 --> 00:46:22,037
♪ And I got what you need ♪
1216
00:46:22,039 --> 00:46:25,717
♪ Sing hallelujah, I'll
make you believe ♪
1217
00:46:25,719 --> 00:46:29,329
♪ 'Cause you do what I
do and I do me... ♪
1218
00:46:29,331 --> 00:46:32,259
Thank you for dinner,
fancy French restaurant.
1219
00:46:32,261 --> 00:46:33,786
Oh, yeah!
1220
00:46:33,788 --> 00:46:36,081
Any escargots in here?
1221
00:46:37,095 --> 00:46:38,995
♪ Here we go, here we go... ♪
1222
00:46:38,997 --> 00:46:40,162
[Mikey] Whoa! Hey!
1223
00:46:40,164 --> 00:46:42,370
Come on! Hey!
1224
00:46:42,372 --> 00:46:45,620
All's fair, Mikey O. All's fair.
1225
00:46:45,622 --> 00:46:47,162
[Mikey] Come on, now!
1226
00:46:47,164 --> 00:46:49,662
Come on! Aww!
1227
00:46:49,664 --> 00:46:51,917
[smooth music playing over speakers]
1228
00:46:51,919 --> 00:46:55,271
♪♪♪
1229
00:46:55,273 --> 00:46:56,662
♪ Boredom, boredom, boredom, boredom ♪
1230
00:46:56,664 --> 00:46:58,620
♪ Boredom, boredom, boredom ♪
1231
00:46:58,622 --> 00:47:00,786
♪ Boy my bedroom floor
is a cereal burial... ♪
1232
00:47:00,788 --> 00:47:02,620
What's going on, fellas?
1233
00:47:02,622 --> 00:47:04,454
Nothing. Just selling lemonade.
1234
00:47:04,456 --> 00:47:06,373
Neighbor said there was a disturbance.
1235
00:47:06,375 --> 00:47:07,812
Yeah, Officer, I called. That was me.
1236
00:47:07,814 --> 00:47:09,120
Seems to be the problem?
1237
00:47:09,122 --> 00:47:10,553
[Clancy] These kids are up to no good.
1238
00:47:10,555 --> 00:47:12,495
They are making way
too much noise, okay?
1239
00:47:12,497 --> 00:47:14,329
They are getting water on my car.
1240
00:47:14,331 --> 00:47:16,037
[Todd] Noise? That's Tyler the Creator.
1241
00:47:16,039 --> 00:47:17,440
They don't belong here, sir.
1242
00:47:17,442 --> 00:47:18,986
We live two streets over.
1243
00:47:18,988 --> 00:47:20,199
Well, I mean, do you have a-a permit
1244
00:47:20,201 --> 00:47:21,686
to operate a food stand
in front of my house?
1245
00:47:21,688 --> 00:47:23,037
Ask them, sir. Do they?
1246
00:47:23,039 --> 00:47:24,831
You need a permit to sell lemonade?
1247
00:47:24,833 --> 00:47:28,207
[indistinct police radio chatter]
1248
00:47:28,209 --> 00:47:30,647
Eighty-three-ten will respond.
1249
00:47:30,649 --> 00:47:32,745
Move the lemonade stand down the street
1250
00:47:32,747 --> 00:47:34,078
and turn down the music.
1251
00:47:34,080 --> 00:47:35,355
Wait, sir, that's it?
1252
00:47:35,357 --> 00:47:37,201
What do you want me to do, lady?
1253
00:47:37,203 --> 00:47:38,620
Shut them down.
1254
00:47:38,622 --> 00:47:40,424
I just got my car washed.
1255
00:47:40,426 --> 00:47:41,768
[sighs]
1256
00:47:42,373 --> 00:47:44,329
You know what?
1257
00:47:44,331 --> 00:47:45,703
Looks like y'all made enough money.
1258
00:47:45,705 --> 00:47:47,192
Why don't you close up shop for the day?
1259
00:47:47,194 --> 00:47:48,526
What? Why?
1260
00:47:49,826 --> 00:47:51,287
Just do it. [sighs]
1261
00:47:51,289 --> 00:47:53,454
It's not worth the aggravation.
1262
00:47:53,456 --> 00:47:54,763
Here's 20 bucks.
1263
00:47:56,164 --> 00:47:58,078
Get yourself a permit.
1264
00:47:58,080 --> 00:48:02,008
♪♪♪
1265
00:48:02,010 --> 00:48:04,055
♪ Got some cars I can handle ♪
1266
00:48:04,057 --> 00:48:05,037
♪ But nowhere for performance... ♪
1267
00:48:05,039 --> 00:48:07,329
Well, you heard the man.
Shut the shit down.
1268
00:48:07,331 --> 00:48:09,579
♪ But I hate eating solo ♪
1269
00:48:09,581 --> 00:48:11,495
♪ Need someone we can
loiter in parking lots ♪
1270
00:48:11,497 --> 00:48:14,037
♪ And sunsets at the border, yeah ♪
1271
00:48:14,039 --> 00:48:16,537
♪ Ringy-dingy-dong, I can't be alone ♪
1272
00:48:16,539 --> 00:48:17,870
♪ I been starting to feel... ♪
1273
00:48:17,872 --> 00:48:19,456
[music stops]
1274
00:48:34,966 --> 00:48:36,288
This is great.
1275
00:48:36,997 --> 00:48:39,775
Big family dinner. This
is exactly what I wanted.
1276
00:48:40,735 --> 00:48:42,765
Are you enjoying the food, Martina?
1277
00:48:42,767 --> 00:48:45,334
Better than what they had
in the holding cell.
1278
00:48:45,336 --> 00:48:46,620
Oh.
1279
00:48:46,622 --> 00:48:48,287
I am so sorry they put you there.
1280
00:48:48,289 --> 00:48:50,378
This is not what
America's normally like.
1281
00:48:51,443 --> 00:48:52,579
I thought you were supposed to be
1282
00:48:52,581 --> 00:48:54,081
the greatest country in the world.
1283
00:48:55,132 --> 00:48:57,007
You caught us at a bad time.
1284
00:48:59,206 --> 00:49:00,425
_
1285
00:49:00,559 --> 00:49:01,659
_
1286
00:49:01,765 --> 00:49:02,646
_
1287
00:49:02,733 --> 00:49:04,439
_
1288
00:49:06,414 --> 00:49:09,078
Hey, what do you say we,
um, finish up dinner
1289
00:49:09,080 --> 00:49:10,786
and watch some TV? Hmm?
1290
00:49:10,788 --> 00:49:13,558
You guys have Pawn Stars in Guatemala?
1291
00:49:16,660 --> 00:49:19,236
Uh, we cannot stay after dinner.
1292
00:49:19,238 --> 00:49:20,377
We have to go back.
1293
00:49:21,539 --> 00:49:23,911
Back? To the detention center?
1294
00:49:23,913 --> 00:49:25,662
To Guatemala.
1295
00:49:25,664 --> 00:49:27,644
We go tonight with our uncle.
1296
00:49:27,646 --> 00:49:30,081
Your uncle? Jose Gomez?
1297
00:49:31,664 --> 00:49:33,786
Our father was deported,
so we have to go back
1298
00:49:33,788 --> 00:49:35,006
to be with him.
1299
00:49:35,008 --> 00:49:37,821
Deported? I'm so sorry.
1300
00:49:37,823 --> 00:49:40,585
[Martina] Sí. Thank you for
1301
00:49:40,587 --> 00:49:42,370
offering to foster us,
1302
00:49:42,372 --> 00:49:44,828
but your country no longer wants
1303
00:49:44,830 --> 00:49:47,828
the tired and poor, yearning to be free,
1304
00:49:47,830 --> 00:49:51,409
like the big green lady in
the New York Harbor says.
1305
00:49:51,411 --> 00:49:52,649
Big green lady?
1306
00:49:52,651 --> 00:49:54,070
Statue of Liberty.
1307
00:50:02,547 --> 00:50:04,140
She's been napping a long time.
1308
00:50:04,702 --> 00:50:06,535
Probably hasn't slept in days.
1309
00:50:07,390 --> 00:50:09,181
Yeah, you know, you can go if you want.
1310
00:50:10,081 --> 00:50:11,569
Are you giving me permission?
1311
00:50:11,571 --> 00:50:12,482
No.
1312
00:50:12,484 --> 00:50:14,662
No, I just mean
1313
00:50:14,664 --> 00:50:16,828
if this is too much to deal with,
1314
00:50:16,830 --> 00:50:18,072
you know, I understand.
1315
00:50:18,074 --> 00:50:20,414
You really think I do
anything I don't want to do?
1316
00:50:24,918 --> 00:50:27,850
No, probably not.
1317
00:50:27,852 --> 00:50:29,081
Damn right.
1318
00:50:36,780 --> 00:50:38,620
[visceral squelching,
bludgeoning sounds on TV]
1319
00:50:38,622 --> 00:50:39,827
Got you. Yes.
1320
00:50:42,413 --> 00:50:43,995
Hi.
1321
00:50:43,997 --> 00:50:45,662
Hey, buddy. What's up?
1322
00:50:45,664 --> 00:50:47,120
Some lady called the cops on me.
1323
00:50:47,122 --> 00:50:48,799
What'd you do?
1324
00:50:48,801 --> 00:50:50,973
Nothing, just selling lemonade
in front of her house.
1325
00:50:50,975 --> 00:50:54,012
Said we got water on her fancy car.
1326
00:51:00,003 --> 00:51:01,329
What lady?
1327
00:51:01,331 --> 00:51:02,703
Over on Bundy.
1328
00:51:02,705 --> 00:51:05,078
The one who bought Mr. Reeback's
house and redid it?
1329
00:51:05,080 --> 00:51:07,287
Uh-huh.
1330
00:51:07,289 --> 00:51:08,537
Who were you with?
1331
00:51:08,539 --> 00:51:09,821
Some friends from school,
1332
00:51:09,823 --> 00:51:11,120
Todd and De-shawn.
1333
00:51:11,122 --> 00:51:12,495
Black kids?
1334
00:51:12,497 --> 00:51:13,635
Yeah.
1335
00:51:14,562 --> 00:51:16,206
Motherfucker.
1336
00:51:18,498 --> 00:51:19,936
Yo!
1337
00:51:19,938 --> 00:51:24,216
[indistinct chatter]
1338
00:51:25,914 --> 00:51:28,287
We're not gonna eat this stuff, right?
1339
00:51:28,289 --> 00:51:29,662
Oh, no, hell no.
1340
00:51:29,664 --> 00:51:31,203
We're gonna Fear Factor this shit.
1341
00:51:31,205 --> 00:51:32,329
[Mikey] I made it!
1342
00:51:32,331 --> 00:51:33,690
- I made it.
- [buzzer blares]
1343
00:51:33,692 --> 00:51:35,789
Shit. Damn it.
1344
00:51:37,997 --> 00:51:40,329
Can't keep this player
from the game, Frank.
1345
00:51:40,331 --> 00:51:41,412
How did you get out?
1346
00:51:41,414 --> 00:51:43,245
Garbage truck came by.
1347
00:51:43,247 --> 00:51:45,370
Dumped me in the back. It was rough,
1348
00:51:45,372 --> 00:51:47,370
but a pile of old Big
Macs broke my fall.
1349
00:51:47,372 --> 00:51:49,079
[Ryan] All right, welcome back.
1350
00:51:49,081 --> 00:51:50,495
We'll now go around and take our pick
1351
00:51:50,497 --> 00:51:53,830
for the dumpster dive competition.
1352
00:51:55,164 --> 00:51:56,397
Sushi, huh?
1353
00:51:56,399 --> 00:51:57,607
Brave choice.
1354
00:51:59,164 --> 00:52:02,098
[rock music]
1355
00:52:02,100 --> 00:52:05,921
♪♪♪
1356
00:52:22,872 --> 00:52:24,370
Hey!
1357
00:52:24,372 --> 00:52:26,790
You know that new bitch over on Bundy?
1358
00:52:26,792 --> 00:52:29,870
Yeah, she pulled some racist
shit on my brother Liam,
1359
00:52:29,872 --> 00:52:31,579
so block party. Come on.
1360
00:52:31,581 --> 00:52:35,203
♪ Hit 'em where it hurts ♪
1361
00:52:35,205 --> 00:52:37,828
♪ Get out now and leave
me in the dirt... ♪
1362
00:52:37,830 --> 00:52:39,870
Hey, Mr. Jackson. We're throwing
1363
00:52:39,872 --> 00:52:41,995
a new racist neighbor a welcome party.
1364
00:52:41,997 --> 00:52:43,454
Bring your pit bull.
1365
00:52:43,456 --> 00:52:45,203
[Mr. Jackson] Come on, boy. Let's go.
1366
00:52:45,205 --> 00:52:46,953
♪ I'm making a comeback ♪
1367
00:52:46,955 --> 00:52:49,412
[crowd cheering]
1368
00:52:49,414 --> 00:52:50,911
♪ You gotta believe that ♪
1369
00:52:50,913 --> 00:52:54,245
♪ I'm making a comeback ♪
1370
00:52:54,247 --> 00:52:57,495
♪♪♪
1371
00:52:57,497 --> 00:52:59,641
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
1372
00:52:59,643 --> 00:53:01,329
Welcome to the South Side, bitch!
1373
00:53:01,331 --> 00:53:03,454
[crowd cheering]
1374
00:53:03,456 --> 00:53:05,742
♪ I'm making a comeback ♪
1375
00:53:08,289 --> 00:53:09,893
You sure you want to do this?
1376
00:53:10,664 --> 00:53:12,747
[Martina] Sí.
1377
00:53:17,292 --> 00:53:18,559
_
1378
00:53:27,193 --> 00:53:28,292
[speaking Spanish] Hello.
1379
00:53:28,294 --> 00:53:30,708
[speaking Spanish] Uncle Jose,
thank you so much for coming.
1380
00:53:31,460 --> 00:53:32,833
- [speaking Spanish] How are you?
- [speaking Spanish] Good.
1381
00:53:34,680 --> 00:53:37,040
_
1382
00:53:50,327 --> 00:53:52,662
I have no idea what he said.
1383
00:53:52,664 --> 00:53:54,955
It was good. He smiled.
1384
00:53:58,289 --> 00:53:59,952
There goes my son.
1385
00:54:03,122 --> 00:54:06,078
[hip-hop music playing over speakers]
1386
00:54:06,080 --> 00:54:07,703
♪♪♪
1387
00:54:07,705 --> 00:54:09,953
I have called the police.
1388
00:54:09,955 --> 00:54:11,495
♪♪♪
1389
00:54:11,497 --> 00:54:14,454
They are on their way.
1390
00:54:14,456 --> 00:54:16,953
You are disturbing the peace.
1391
00:54:16,955 --> 00:54:19,078
Hey, lady.
1392
00:54:19,080 --> 00:54:21,662
That was my brother with
the lemonade stand.
1393
00:54:21,664 --> 00:54:23,412
- What?
- That's right.
1394
00:54:23,414 --> 00:54:24,931
I got a black brother.
1395
00:54:24,933 --> 00:54:27,287
♪♪♪
1396
00:54:27,289 --> 00:54:29,078
What? That's why you didn't want him
1397
00:54:29,080 --> 00:54:30,828
near your house, right?
1398
00:54:30,830 --> 00:54:32,365
'Cause he's black?
1399
00:54:33,164 --> 00:54:35,870
Okay, you need to go home.
1400
00:54:35,872 --> 00:54:37,911
Some of us have jobs.
1401
00:54:37,913 --> 00:54:40,360
You know, I lived in this
neighborhood my whole life.
1402
00:54:41,830 --> 00:54:44,927
Kids have always sold
lemonade right here.
1403
00:54:45,705 --> 00:54:48,662
Black kids, white kids,
1404
00:54:48,664 --> 00:54:51,120
Russian kids, Mexican kids.
1405
00:54:51,122 --> 00:54:53,828
Would you get away from my fence?
1406
00:54:53,830 --> 00:54:58,537
Nobody ever had a problem
with lemonade stands
1407
00:54:58,539 --> 00:55:01,995
until all of you bougie,
1408
00:55:01,997 --> 00:55:03,995
yoga-loving,
1409
00:55:03,997 --> 00:55:06,162
latte-sipping,
1410
00:55:06,164 --> 00:55:11,037
ankle tattoo-wearing, racist assholes
1411
00:55:11,039 --> 00:55:13,373
moved into our neighborhood,
so your fence?
1412
00:55:14,581 --> 00:55:16,495
Fuck your fence.
1413
00:55:16,497 --> 00:55:18,329
♪♪♪
1414
00:55:18,331 --> 00:55:20,579
- [blow lands]
- [crowd gasps]
1415
00:55:20,581 --> 00:55:22,495
- [siren blips]
- [growls]
1416
00:55:22,497 --> 00:55:26,495
♪♪♪
1417
00:55:26,497 --> 00:55:28,745
Ah, shit!
1418
00:55:28,747 --> 00:55:29,811
[police officer] Hey!
1419
00:55:29,813 --> 00:55:32,703
[rock music]
1420
00:55:32,705 --> 00:55:37,463
♪♪♪
1421
00:55:38,417 --> 00:55:44,417
Sync and corrections by btsix
www.addic7ed.com
1422
00:55:45,164 --> 00:55:48,162
[crowd booing]
1423
00:55:48,164 --> 00:55:50,745
♪ Well, I'm about to explode ♪
1424
00:55:50,747 --> 00:55:52,953
♪ Let it out, let it go ♪
1425
00:55:52,955 --> 00:55:55,162
♪ And if you're down for the show ♪
1426
00:55:55,164 --> 00:55:57,695
♪ I got something I've
been keeping secret ♪
1427
00:55:57,697 --> 00:56:00,162
♪ Shown never before ♪
1428
00:56:00,164 --> 00:56:02,495
♪ 'Bout to kick in the door ♪
1429
00:56:02,497 --> 00:56:04,579
♪ I know you want it some more ♪
1430
00:56:04,581 --> 00:56:07,516
♪ But I've got no time left
for tongue in cheek and ♪
1431
00:56:07,518 --> 00:56:09,909
♪ I've got, got, got to let it out ♪
1432
00:56:09,911 --> 00:56:11,953
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1433
00:56:11,955 --> 00:56:14,019
♪ I've got, got, got to ♪
1434
00:56:14,021 --> 00:56:16,412
Video of the food challenge went viral.
1435
00:56:16,414 --> 00:56:18,412
Over 400,000 views.
1436
00:56:18,414 --> 00:56:21,003
People are doing something
called the "Hobo Dragon."
1437
00:56:24,289 --> 00:56:26,442
[Ryan laughs]
1438
00:56:26,444 --> 00:56:29,059
We are totally getting
promoted after this.
1439
00:56:30,039 --> 00:56:32,037
[paramedic 1] Another
alcohol poisoning inside?
1440
00:56:32,039 --> 00:56:33,828
[paramedic 2] Yeah, fourth one today.
1441
00:56:33,830 --> 00:56:39,120
♪♪♪
1442
00:56:39,122 --> 00:56:41,287
♪ I've got, got, got to let it out ♪
1443
00:56:41,289 --> 00:56:43,703
♪ Let it out, let it out, let it out ♪
1444
00:56:43,705 --> 00:56:46,120
- ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
1445
00:56:46,122 --> 00:56:48,789
- ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪
- ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪
98024
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