Original subtitles

♪♪

Crime in San Fransokyo, at an all-time low,

according to a new study released today

by the Department of New Studies.

Thank you, Big Hero 6.

Since there's nothing else going on, today we begin a 12-part series

on "Foods I Don't Care For."

Part one: Yams.

The yam has a high amount of vitamin B5,

C, and nutritional fiber.

Hiro?

Hiro?

Hiro?

-(louder) Hiro! -Aah!

Has your hearing become impaired?

Can you hear me now?

Uh, sorry, Baymax. I was just distracted.

I know this is all connected.

Like this painting. I bet Globby stole it for Obake. But why?

Obake's planning something big. I've gotta figure this out.

-Nothing's more important. -(beeping)

Hiro, there's nothing more important

than what I'm about to tell you

Wait. Is that a conspiracy wall

Nice.

Fred, what is it?

Oh. Wasabi's birthday's in three days,

as you can see on my birthday wall.

Hello. I am Baymax.

(theme music playing)

♪ Whoa-oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oh, whoa-oh ♪

♪ Whoa-oh, whoa-oh ♪

So, what should we get Wasabi for his birthday?

I say we get him a custom-made Dandy Boy costume!

-Dandy Boy? -Duh. Captain Fancy's number two?

He's, like, my second favorite sidekick.

Don't worry, Mini-Max. You'll always be my first favorite.

I was not worried.

-Sure, you weren't. -It is true.

The defense of the principles of goodness

consumes my thoughts at all times!

Mm-hm, yeah. Again, sure you weren't.

Ooh, I got it! What if we got Wasabi a puppy?

Wasabi is allergic to all species of canine.

Aw. Well, I guess Pablo the puppy could live with me and Go Go.

-Right, Go Go? -Oh, boy. You named it.

-Pablo! -We should just give Wasabi cash in a paper bag.

He can do what he wants with it, no questions asked.

-Hmm. -Why aren't you writing that down?

Guys, you know how Wasabi's car is still stuck in the Bay?

What if we got it out and fixed it up for him?

-That's also a great idea. -I'm in.

Someone should distract Wasabi while you guys fix the car.

Good call, Fred.

We interrupt "Foods I Don't Care For" for some actual news.

Boss Awesome, beloved San Fransokyo superhero, is now larger than life,

thanks to this beautiful, brand-new mega-monument in the Bay.

The super statue was a gift from...

(whispers) Who was it a gift from?

That's my dad, Boss Awesome.

They're always makin' statues of him.

Usually not this big, though.

According to the Hero-pedia,

Boss Awesome is considered the greatest superhero of all-time!

Yeah. He's made the cover

of Super People magazine, like, 10 times.

It would be extremely difficult for his offspring to measure up

to such a remarkable legacy!

Yeah. It would.

Well, find out! I look like a super idiot out here with half a story!

Wait! I'm his offspring!

Oh, boy. Never thought about that.

So, back to "Foods I Don't Care For, Part Two...

Black Jelly Beans."

If we're gonna fish Wasabi's car out of the Bay,

we're gonna need some new underwater gear.

Baymax: Oh.

Suit warmer, on.

Let's dive.

Baymax: I cannot dive.

Aah!

Hello.

I think I got it.

(grunts)

-(growling) -Aah!

(growling)

Aah!

Baymax, sonic blaster!

This will not hurt.

(roaring)

-Thanks, Baymax. -You are welcome.

You're clear, Baymax.

(Fred humming)

Okay, birthday boy. Where do you feel like going on your special day?

The arcade? The zoo? The arcade?

Actually, I was thinking of going buck wild.

Let's hit my favorite store, the Organized Gentleman!

Oh. That sounds...

fun.

I can't wait to see Wasabi's face.

Here it is. You are welcome.

I-- I mean... when he sees his car.

Good to go.

What are you doing?

Is that a picture of your conspiracy wall?

Obake's playing us, I just know it.

Don't worry, Hiro. We'll be ready.

When it really matters.

Yeah, I'm not really a shoulder patter.

All: ♪ Happy Birthday, dear Wasabi ♪

♪ Happy Birthday to you! ♪

Ha-ha, right!

It's my sock drawer!

And it's a cake!

Oh, and don't worry, none of the frostings are touching.

It's perfect.

Except, you got the plaid and the argyle mixed up, but still...

Wasabi, just blow out your candles.

Birthday cakes have a significant increase in bacteria on the surface

after candles are extinguished.

See? This guy gets me.

Follow us!

We have a surprise for you!

All: Surprise!

Baymax: Surprise.

Hey, that looks like my car.

That's because it is your car!

But now, dry!

We upgraded a couple of things.

By "a couple," we mean everything.

You guys!

Ooh, you're givin' me all the feels.

Now, who wants to go for a test drive?

♪ ♪

(beeping)

Obake: The boy likes to keep busy.

-So do I. -(rumbling)

(beeping)

Baron von Steamer?

Stupid name.

(horns honking)

Hiro: Your dad's statue looks cool.

Wasabi: Huh, it's a lot bigger in person.

Okay, fine, I get it. I'll never measure up to my dad,

who is so awesome, it's actually in his name.

Whatever. You don't have to be him.

You be you, Freddie.

-(phone rings) -Ooh.

Heathcliff, my man. What do you want?

Master Frederick, an urgent message from Baron von Steamer.

-On the phone? -No.

Baron's message, sir.

Oh. Hit the lights, Mini-Max.

I thrive on being useful!

Greetings, Boss Awesome.

It is I, Baron von Steamer, your archnemesis.

Really could've just phoned.

Meet me in Night Market Square by tomorrow at noon

for an epic showdown!

Otherwise, I'll... dramatic pause... destroy the city!

(cackles)

Hey, uh, I didn't mean to read "dramatic pause,"

but in fact, pause dramatically Well, you get the gist!

(laughs evilly)

Gee, mister, that old-timey guy

sure is gonna mess with your plans.

Obake: Big Hero 6 lives for this sort of thing.

Not worried.

(crickets chirping)

I wish I could help, son. But--

I know, I know. You're halfway across the world,

at the family rain forest preserve, saving the sloths.

-She thinks I'm her mommy. -(purring)

He'd never make it in time, anyway.

Steamer has pulled this same stunt a dozen times.

Threatened to destroy the entire city

unless you show up to a showdown?

-Bingo. -How did you beat him?

Yes. I am confused.

According to Hero-pedia,

you were repeatedly captured.

While he gloated about his plans,

I'd bust out and save the day.

Wait, so every time you pretended to get captured,

Steamer would just explain his plan?

Like clockwork.

What are you thinking, Hiro?

What if we dress Fred up as Boss Awesome?

And wait for Steamer to reveal his plan,

so we can be ready to stop it!

What happened to me be me?

New plan. You be him.

What do you say, son?

Classic!

-(grunts) -Classic!

Mini-Max: It is an honor to work with the world-renowned

champion of justice!

Stop man-crushing on my dad, Mini-Max.

You're makin' it Mini-Maximum awkward for everyone.

Okay, son. The key to being Boss Awesome is--

Say classic a lot?

Absolutely! Hey, but, also, I've got signature moves!

(mutters excitedly)

The Coffee Table!

The Dentist!

The Twister!

Okay, okay, my turn!

The Inverted Hammer!

Ouch!

No, that wasn't right.

The Summer Wind!

(grunting)

Ha-ha! The Blender!

(grunts)

(moans)

Ninety percent there, though.

(clears throat) It is I, Baron von Steamer.

Okay, son, give the Five-Point Poke a try.

Is that the one where you do a double backflip, land on their shoulders,

poke them in five pressure points,

causing temporary paralysis?

That's the one!

(breathes deeply)

Here goes nothing.

(grunts)

(giggling) I'm sorry, sir.

But I'm extremely ticklish.

I see no paralysis, only delight.

(beeping)

Whatcha doing, mister?

Converting H2O into D2O.

Whatcha doin' that for?

Isolating the deuterium turns water into fuel.

What's deuterium, mister?

Nifty remote, mister.

What does that do?

Now, where was I?

♪ ♪

Classic!

Oh, boy, Dad. I don't know if I can fill your shoes.

Seriously, what size are these?

It's not how big your feet are,

it's how big your heart is.

And you are gonna be awesome.

Thanks, Dad.

(grunts, purrs)

Private moment, sloth!

Don't worry. We got you.

Mm! Be careful, Freddie.

Good luck. The mustache is working.

Thanks, guys.

(whispers) Check, check. One, two.

Loud and clear.

Classic. Classic.

-Class-- Oh, whoa, whoa! -(rumbling)

(whirring)

Well, well, well!

if it isn't my mortal enemy, Boss Awesome.

Yep, that's me. Boss Awesome.

Classic!

Nailed it.

Ow! (grunts)

(flatly) Oh, no! You've captured me, you fiend.

Hmm, you look... different.

I-- I do? Is it my loose boots?

Because I have an explanation for that.

No, no, I... I like the boots.

The boots work. Some-- Something else.

Hmm.

You've been working out!

(others sighing)

(laughs) Oh, you-- you got me!

I just joined a new gym, yep.

Gettin'... Gettin' my swole on!

Get in!

-He's in. -Now we wait.

You can do this, Freddie!

Huh?

I'm going to make you watch the destruction

of your beloved San Fransokyo

before I destroy you! (cackling)

-And...? -And what?

Aren't you gonna tell me in great detail

how you're gonna destroy the city?

No. I'm just gonna destroy it.

What?

You see, I realized you always beat me

because I explain my plan right before I go through with it.

But not this time!

(cackling)

But wouldn't it be fun to tell me?

(sighs)

It would be delicious.

But must resist oversharing.

Come on, Steamer, huh?

No villain can resist the urge to revel in their own brilliance.

You're right. I can't resist a good revel!

But that is why I'm taking precautions.

No!

(muffled cackling)

-(cackling continues) -Now what?

We have to figure out where the attack is going to come from.

Steamer could show up anywhere,

and he has a drill car.

-(feedback whines) -Obake: You know, for a child prodigy,

-you disappoint me. -Obake.

Isn't it obvious, Hiro? Steamer's end game?

Think bigger.

-(feedback whines) -Well, that was creepy.

Think bigger.

Guys, that Boss Awesome statue, it's a weapon!

(steam hissing)

(mumbling)

Okay, I think you're being evil, but I can't really tell.

Aah!

Sorry. Completely forgot I gagged myself.

What I said was...

Say goodbye to San Fransokyo!

The statue! Of course!

(cackling) Yes!

The Boss Awesome statue was a secret weapon the whole time!

Ooh, oh, it feels good to let it out!

(screaming)

It's sucking up the water in the Bay, so it can--

Blast the city with it!

-I have an idea. -(beeps)

I hope you brought your wrinkly laundry,

because things are about to get steamy!

Uh, why would I bring my laundry?

That's a ridiculous thing to say right now.

Boss Awesome never questions my banter.

He just goes with it.

Um, I mean, I did bring my clothesline

to hang you out to dry!

Ha-ha! That's the Boss Awesome I know!

Baymax, overdrive mode.

But overdrive mode will drain Baymax's battery, Hiro.

Baymax: My systems cannot fully function on a low battery.

I know, Baymax, but we need as much speed as we can get.

-Wasabi: For what? -No time to explain.

Baymax: Entering overdrive mode.

Baymax: Oh, no.

(cackling)

Baymax, sonic blaster, now!

(Hiro screams)

(grunting)

-(Hiro screams) -Baymax: I did the thing!

Big Hero 6 for the win!

Say what?

I mean-- I mean-- I mean... classic!

I wouldn't drop that annoying catchphrase so fast if I were you.

You see, it also occurred to me that you win every time

because I never have a Plan B!

Behold!

I don't even know who you are anymore.

Baymax: Hello... I'm Bah-la-la-la-la.

-(slurring) I swim in the water... -Baymax!

Huh?

-Guys? -Don't worry, Hiro. We're on it.

-We are? -You still haven't tested

the coolest new feature we added.

Just press that button.

How's a self-car wash button gonna help us, Go Go?

That's not a self-car wash button.

What is it? A button that transforms my car into an underwater car?

It's a button that transforms my car into an underwater car!

(tires screech)

(Wasabi laughs)

Best birthday ever!

(beeps)

Sayonara, San Fransokyo!

Honey Lemon: Heat-seeking missiles!

We have to divert them!

-Fast! -Button for that.

Freddie, time to get out of there.

(beeping)

-No! That's the wrong target! -(chains shatter)

And I'm guessin' you don't have a Plan C?

♪ ♪

(gasps)

(grunts)

Out of my way, millennial!

You won this time, Big Hero 6.

But mark my words, I will have my reveng--

(grunts)

-Goochie-goochie-goochie... -(giggling) Stop it! No, please.

I despise getting... tickled!

(giggling) I'll do anything!

Will you surrender and turn yourself in to the police?

(giggling) Yes! Yes! Yes!

I-- I'll surrender and turn myself in to the police!

(giggling) No! Please!

(grunts)

Wait! You're not Boss Awesome!

You're his baby child!

Mark my words! I will have my re--

I just can't with the revenge-vowing anymore.

Nice, Fred. Was that one of your dad's moves?

Yeah. But I put my own twist on it.

-What do you call it? -I was thinkin' the "Goochie Goochie Gotcha."

As Mr. Frederickson would say...

Hiro/Wasabi/Fred: Classic!

Classic.

I don't know about you guys,

but I'm still creeped out that Obake was able to hack us.

And how weird was it that he helped us?

Yeah. Why would he help us save the city?

Maybe it wasn't about the city.

Maybe it was about the water.

(beeping)

Thank you, Big Hero 6.

(theme music playing)

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