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1
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Boy, the way Glenn Miller played
2
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Songs that made the hit parade
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Guys like us, we had it made
4
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Those were the days
5
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And you knew where you were then
6
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Girls were girls, and men were men
7
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Mister, we could use a man
like Herbert Hoover again
8
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Didn't need no welfare state
9
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Everybody pulled his weight
10
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Gee, our old LaSalle ran great
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Those were the days
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[HUMMING]
13
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Oh! Ew!
14
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Glow little glowworm
15
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Glimmer, glimmer
16
00:01:03,334 --> 00:01:05,567
Edith!
17
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I'm home.
18
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EDITH: In the kitchen!
19
00:01:08,601 --> 00:01:10,067
Let's eat fast, will you?
20
00:01:10,067 --> 00:01:11,267
I wanna pick up the start
21
00:01:11,267 --> 00:01:14,868
of the Rangers-Blackhawks game on TV, see--
22
00:01:14,868 --> 00:01:17,300
Oh, geez. What is this?
23
00:01:17,300 --> 00:01:19,367
One, two, three.
24
00:01:19,367 --> 00:01:21,934
What do we got, a deadbeat for dinner?
25
00:01:21,934 --> 00:01:24,567
That ain't nice.
26
00:01:24,567 --> 00:01:27,434
You're telling me. I hate it.
27
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Company from Jersey.
28
00:01:30,734 --> 00:01:32,634
From Jersey?
29
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I'd rather see somebody from Red China.
30
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Do you remember my Aunt Tessie,
31
00:01:40,467 --> 00:01:42,968
on my father's side?
32
00:01:42,968 --> 00:01:47,934
Oh, gee. Who is that
? Tessie with the moustache?
33
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Not anymore!
34
00:01:50,234 --> 00:01:54,167
Elizabeth Arden took care of that.
35
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Anyway, it ain't her that's comin'.
36
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It ain't Elizabeth Arden that's comin'?
37
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No. It ain't Aunt Tessie that ain't comin'.
38
00:02:03,567 --> 00:02:05,968
It's Floyd. Oh.
39
00:02:05,968 --> 00:02:07,133
Floyd ain't comin'.
40
00:02:07,133 --> 00:02:09,868
No, Floyd is comin'.
41
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Jeez. I'm punchy, Edith.
42
00:02:17,968 --> 00:02:20,033
That makes him a once-removed
43
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nephew-in-law to my father
44
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:27,767
and a twice-removed step
cousin-in-law to me.
45
00:02:30,367 --> 00:02:35,534
Well, apart from being such
a close relative, Edith...
46
00:02:35,534 --> 00:02:38,501
what the hell does Floyd
want with us? Money?
47
00:02:38,501 --> 00:02:42,567
Oh, no! He's just passin' through.
48
00:02:42,567 --> 00:02:45,033
Yeah, that's what Jesse
James was always doin',
49
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just passing through.
50
00:02:48,467 --> 00:02:52,067
Oh, my. He's had such a sad life.
51
00:02:52,067 --> 00:02:53,901
- Let me tell you what happened.
- No, no, Edith.
52
00:02:53,901 --> 00:02:56,934
Please, don't tell me-- don't
tell me, Edith, please.
53
00:02:56,934 --> 00:02:58,968
I don't wanna know nothin' about this guy!
54
00:02:58,968 --> 00:03:00,300
[DOORBELL RINGS]
55
00:03:00,300 --> 00:03:01,701
- Oh, there he is! - Already?
56
00:03:01,701 --> 00:03:04,200
- Archie, be nice! - Oh!
57
00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:08,133
Coming!
58
00:03:11,434 --> 00:03:13,100
- Floyd! - [laughs]
59
00:03:13,100 --> 00:03:15,667
Oh, it's so nice to see you!
60
00:03:15,667 --> 00:03:18,033
Edith, you're a sight for sore eyes.
61
00:03:18,033 --> 00:03:20,701
Come on in. Put your bags down.
62
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- Yeah, yeah. - Archie!
63
00:03:22,501 --> 00:03:24,467
Look who's here!
64
00:03:24,467 --> 00:03:26,834
I'm lookin'. I'm lookin'.
65
00:03:26,834 --> 00:03:28,067
Oh!
66
00:03:28,067 --> 00:03:31,767
This here is my Stephanie.
67
00:03:31,767 --> 00:03:34,234
Stephanie! Oh--
68
00:03:34,234 --> 00:03:37,567
You didn't tell me you
was bringin' Stephanie.
69
00:03:37,567 --> 00:03:40,100
Well, I wanted it to be a surprise.
70
00:03:40,100 --> 00:03:43,334
I knew there'd be some surprise.
71
00:03:43,334 --> 00:03:47,200
Oh, Stephanie, I used to know you
72
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:49,267
when you was a little baby.
73
00:03:49,267 --> 00:03:51,234
But you grew!
74
00:03:51,234 --> 00:03:54,701
Oh, my, she really grew!
75
00:03:54,701 --> 00:03:58,534
That's the main thing kids do, Edith.
76
00:03:58,534 --> 00:04:00,200
Oh, excuse me.
77
00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:02,267
Floyd, this is Archie.
78
00:04:02,267 --> 00:04:03,334
Hi, Arch.
79
00:04:03,334 --> 00:04:05,634
Yeah, hi there, Floyd.
80
00:04:05,634 --> 00:04:08,467
I'm your Aunt Edith.
81
00:04:08,467 --> 00:04:10,000
It's nice to see you.
82
00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:11,901
I heard a lot about you.
83
00:04:11,901 --> 00:04:13,801
[giggling] Oh!
84
00:04:13,801 --> 00:04:16,701
Oh, this is your Uncle Archie.
85
00:04:16,701 --> 00:04:18,634
Hiya there, kiddo.
86
00:04:18,634 --> 00:04:22,534
I heard a lot about you, too.
87
00:04:24,534 --> 00:04:27,000
Stephanie, go give your Uncle Archie
88
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a great big hug and a kiss, huh?
89
00:04:28,701 --> 00:04:30,868
Oh--Uh, no, no, she don't have to do that.
90
00:04:30,868 --> 00:04:32,000
You don't have to do that, kid.
91
00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,968
Not unless you really want to.
92
00:04:33,968 --> 00:04:35,567
Thank you.
93
00:04:39,133 --> 00:04:43,100
Well, come on. Let's everybody sit down.
94
00:04:44,601 --> 00:04:47,300
Well, you got bags. You're
takin' a trip, huh?
95
00:04:47,300 --> 00:04:49,501
Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm on my
way to Fort Lauderdale.
96
00:04:49,501 --> 00:04:51,767
Oh, that's a nice, long way. Yeah.
97
00:04:51,767 --> 00:04:55,267
Would you like some milk and cookies?
98
00:04:55,267 --> 00:04:56,767
No, thanks.
99
00:04:56,767 --> 00:04:58,934
Would you like an apple?
100
00:04:58,934 --> 00:05:00,367
No, thanks,
101
00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:05,033
Would you like to wash
your hands or anything?
102
00:05:05,033 --> 00:05:08,534
No, thanks, but I'd like to go to the john.
103
00:05:08,534 --> 00:05:10,701
[giggling] Oh!
104
00:05:10,701 --> 00:05:11,934
Well, come on!
105
00:05:11,934 --> 00:05:15,334
I'll show you where it is.
106
00:05:15,334 --> 00:05:18,801
- We're goin' to the john. - I heard.
107
00:05:21,434 --> 00:05:24,100
Goin' to the john.
108
00:05:24,100 --> 00:05:25,567
You'd think you coulda taught her
109
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to say "terlit," like educated people.
110
00:05:28,300 --> 00:05:30,968
Well, I do the best I can.
111
00:05:30,968 --> 00:05:34,200
Well, you missed.
112
00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:37,767
Well, you might as well
sit down, if you want to.
113
00:05:37,767 --> 00:05:39,634
Gee, thanks.
114
00:05:39,634 --> 00:05:41,968
Hold it. Not in that chair.
115
00:05:43,567 --> 00:05:45,000
Gee, I hope you don't mind, Arch,
116
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but I think I could use a drink.
117
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No, I don't mind.
118
00:05:48,868 --> 00:05:52,067
I think I got a bottle of--
119
00:05:53,767 --> 00:05:57,834
Oh, geez. The drunk's demitasse.
120
00:05:57,834 --> 00:05:59,767
[HUMMING]
121
00:06:17,767 --> 00:06:19,300
Do you like kids?
122
00:06:19,300 --> 00:06:22,601
Oh, I love kids!
123
00:06:22,601 --> 00:06:24,734
Does Uncle Archie like 'em?
124
00:06:24,734 --> 00:06:26,133
Oh, sure, he does.
125
00:06:26,133 --> 00:06:29,234
We got a kid of our own--Gloria.
126
00:06:29,234 --> 00:06:31,767
I'll show you a picture of her.
127
00:06:31,767 --> 00:06:35,601
You met her at Aunt Shirley's apartment
128
00:06:35,601 --> 00:06:37,067
in Brooklyn once.
129
00:06:37,067 --> 00:06:40,767
She's all grown up now.
130
00:06:40,767 --> 00:06:42,200
There she is.
131
00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:44,534
And that's her little boy Joey.
132
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He's nearly three.
133
00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:50,467
I used to sing him a lullaby every night,
134
00:06:50,467 --> 00:06:52,834
and as soon as I stopped singin',
135
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he went right off to sleep.
136
00:06:56,934 --> 00:06:59,567
So, you see, we love kids.
137
00:06:59,567 --> 00:07:01,400
Some people don't.
138
00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:05,801
Oh, I don't know anybody
that don't like kids.
139
00:07:05,801 --> 00:07:08,234
You know Aunt Shirley from Brooklyn?
140
00:07:08,234 --> 00:07:10,601
Oh, yeah. That's true.
141
00:07:10,601 --> 00:07:12,234
And Aunt Vera from Hollis?
142
00:07:12,234 --> 00:07:14,267
Oh, yeah. Her, too.
143
00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:15,601
They don't like kids.
144
00:07:15,601 --> 00:07:17,634
They even said so to me.
145
00:07:17,634 --> 00:07:20,767
I don't think my mother
liked kids much either.
146
00:07:20,767 --> 00:07:22,901
You musn't say that.
147
00:07:22,901 --> 00:07:25,100
When she went away,
148
00:07:25,100 --> 00:07:26,634
she didn't take me with her.
149
00:07:26,634 --> 00:07:31,200
Well, maybe she wanted to but she couldn't.
150
00:07:31,200 --> 00:07:33,501
She said the man she went
with wouldn't let her.
151
00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,567
Can I see Gloria's room?
152
00:07:38,567 --> 00:07:41,133
Oh, this isGloria's room.
153
00:07:41,133 --> 00:07:45,934
You can take a nap in here
before dinner if you want to.
154
00:07:50,501 --> 00:07:52,267
Are we gonna have dinner?
155
00:07:52,267 --> 00:07:54,667
Oh, sure!
156
00:07:54,667 --> 00:07:57,133
We're gonna have a real nice dinner,
157
00:07:57,133 --> 00:08:00,167
'cause you're a real nice little girl.
158
00:08:12,067 --> 00:08:16,033
So, anyway...
159
00:08:16,033 --> 00:08:17,834
Gee, I hate to ask for help.
160
00:08:17,834 --> 00:08:21,067
Well, that's good 'cause I hate to give it.
161
00:08:23,100 --> 00:08:25,100
Especially if it's money.
162
00:08:25,100 --> 00:08:27,601
Oh, no, no, it's not money.
163
00:08:27,601 --> 00:08:30,601
Well, then you got a chance. What is it?
164
00:08:30,601 --> 00:08:32,133
Well...
165
00:08:32,133 --> 00:08:34,567
See, I was sort of hopin'
that maybe you could
166
00:08:34,567 --> 00:08:37,634
look after Stephanie for
me for a couple of weeks.
167
00:08:37,634 --> 00:08:39,501
You had a better chance for money.
168
00:08:40,734 --> 00:08:42,067
Wait--
169
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it's just till I get set.
170
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I mean, she won't be no trouble at all.
171
00:08:45,300 --> 00:08:47,300
Oh, quit your kiddin', will you, Floyd?
172
00:08:47,300 --> 00:08:50,100
Listen, Edith don't need no helpless child
173
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hangin' around demandin' all her attention.
174
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She's got me.
175
00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:57,667
What are you two talkin' about?
176
00:08:57,667 --> 00:08:59,234
Oh, this guy here.
177
00:08:59,234 --> 00:09:00,934
He wants to beat it to Florida
178
00:09:00,934 --> 00:09:02,634
and dump his kid on us.
179
00:09:02,634 --> 00:09:04,734
It's just for two weeks, maybe three.
180
00:09:04,734 --> 00:09:06,033
No, no, no. Edith--
181
00:09:06,033 --> 00:09:09,367
Edith, tell Floyd he's
barkin' up the wrong tree.
182
00:09:09,367 --> 00:09:12,267
You're barkin' up the wrong tree.
183
00:09:12,267 --> 00:09:14,434
You heard the boss.
184
00:09:14,434 --> 00:09:17,701
And we'd love to keep Stephanie for you!
185
00:09:17,701 --> 00:09:19,334
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
186
00:09:19,334 --> 00:09:20,434
Oh, Edith, you're a saint!
187
00:09:20,434 --> 00:09:22,567
Hey! Hey, Floyd!
188
00:09:22,567 --> 00:09:25,601
Hey, the Pope give us enough saints.
189
00:09:25,601 --> 00:09:27,033
Are you nuts?
190
00:09:27,033 --> 00:09:28,734
- Yeah! - You are?
191
00:09:28,734 --> 00:09:30,968
Oh, no!
192
00:09:30,968 --> 00:09:33,234
Then don't be actin' like a nut, will ya?
193
00:09:33,234 --> 00:09:35,601
We finally got a nice,
peaceful life goin' here.
194
00:09:35,601 --> 00:09:37,334
You wanna louse it up with another kid?
195
00:09:37,334 --> 00:09:39,434
But it's only for two weeks!
196
00:09:39,434 --> 00:09:40,801
- Three at the most. - Oh, geez, Edith!
197
00:09:40,801 --> 00:09:44,234
Shh! Edith.
198
00:09:44,234 --> 00:09:47,634
Have pity on yourself, will you?
199
00:09:47,634 --> 00:09:52,000
You're an older woman. Can't you face that?
200
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:55,200
And I'm getting there pretty fast myself.
201
00:09:55,200 --> 00:09:58,701
Kids louse up your life there,
202
00:09:58,701 --> 00:10:00,801
and we ain't got that much left!
203
00:10:02,434 --> 00:10:04,467
Are we getting thrown out again?
204
00:10:06,033 --> 00:10:07,300
Yeah.
205
00:10:07,300 --> 00:10:09,701
That is exactly what we're gettin'.
206
00:10:09,701 --> 00:10:11,000
Come on. Get your stuff.
207
00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:14,033
Wait a minute! Ain't you
gonna stay for dinner?
208
00:10:14,033 --> 00:10:15,701
No, people don't wanna eat
209
00:10:15,701 --> 00:10:17,968
when their feelings are hurt.
210
00:10:17,968 --> 00:10:20,267
Never mind, Edith.
211
00:10:20,267 --> 00:10:21,734
We got a bus to catch.
212
00:10:21,734 --> 00:10:24,534
I hope you can manage, Floyd.
213
00:10:24,534 --> 00:10:26,534
Oh, don't worry, Edith. I'll manage.
214
00:10:26,534 --> 00:10:28,901
I got it all worked out.
215
00:10:28,901 --> 00:10:30,634
This is it, kid. Let's go.
216
00:10:30,634 --> 00:10:32,801
Oh, well, Stephanie...
217
00:10:32,801 --> 00:10:35,200
I'm sorry.
218
00:10:37,934 --> 00:10:42,901
I hope we see each other again real soon.
219
00:10:42,901 --> 00:10:45,968
We will, Aunt Edith.
220
00:11:02,667 --> 00:11:05,701
Now don't be giving me that look.
221
00:11:09,167 --> 00:11:12,868
I'm sorry I made you feel bad, but
I ain't sorry for what I done!
222
00:11:18,033 --> 00:11:20,100
[SIGHS]
223
00:11:23,133 --> 00:11:28,334
Oh, listen, don't start
this stuff, will you?
224
00:11:28,334 --> 00:11:29,801
Edith.
225
00:11:29,801 --> 00:11:31,901
When people bring kids into this world,
226
00:11:31,901 --> 00:11:34,067
they gotta raise 'em themselves there.
227
00:11:34,067 --> 00:11:35,400
But they ain't gonna do that
228
00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:37,834
if they can find kind and dopey relatives
229
00:11:37,834 --> 00:11:39,467
who're gonna do it for them!
230
00:11:39,467 --> 00:11:40,968
[DOORBELL RINGS]
231
00:11:40,968 --> 00:11:43,200
I'll get that.
232
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:44,267
Your cousin Floyd,
233
00:11:44,267 --> 00:11:47,033
he learned a good lesson here today.
234
00:11:47,033 --> 00:11:49,767
He learned that he can't
dump his responsibilities
235
00:11:49,767 --> 00:11:51,601
in our living room.
236
00:12:01,100 --> 00:12:03,968
Oh, holy cow.
237
00:12:16,701 --> 00:12:18,567
Floyd learned fast, Edith.
238
00:12:18,567 --> 00:12:22,267
He dumped his responsibilities
on our porch!
239
00:12:24,934 --> 00:12:25,968
Oh!
240
00:12:35,701 --> 00:12:37,133
Wait a minute, Waldo.
241
00:12:37,133 --> 00:12:39,167
Listen, all I'm askin' to do
242
00:12:39,167 --> 00:12:41,100
is take care of this little kid
243
00:12:41,100 --> 00:12:43,834
just for two weeks till
her daddy comes back--
244
00:12:43,834 --> 00:12:46,734
Hello?
245
00:12:46,734 --> 00:12:49,400
You lousy bum.
246
00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:52,200
Won't do nothin' for a
helpless little child.
247
00:12:52,200 --> 00:12:53,234
EDITH: Shh!
248
00:12:53,234 --> 00:12:54,334
Oh, don't shush me.
249
00:12:54,334 --> 00:12:57,300
Jeez, your relatives are selfish.
250
00:12:57,300 --> 00:13:00,067
Stephie's takin' a nap.
251
00:13:00,067 --> 00:13:02,901
Edith, we're runnin' out of
relatives here, that's all.
252
00:13:02,901 --> 00:13:05,133
Then we just have to face it.
253
00:13:05,133 --> 00:13:10,200
We got a nice little girl
on our hands for two weeks,
254
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:12,000
maybe three.
255
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,634
Oh, geez. Well, I don't--
256
00:13:14,634 --> 00:13:16,734
Hold it, hold it. Here's one I missed.
257
00:13:16,734 --> 00:13:18,934
Who is this? Lawson, L.
258
00:13:18,934 --> 00:13:22,434
Louella Lawson!
259
00:13:22,434 --> 00:13:27,267
Oh, I ain't thought about her for years!
260
00:13:27,267 --> 00:13:31,234
Well, geez, Edith! Think
about her now, will ya, huh?
261
00:13:31,234 --> 00:13:32,567
Her address is right here.
262
00:13:32,567 --> 00:13:35,934
Sunnyfield Farm. Utica, New York, there.
263
00:13:35,934 --> 00:13:37,167
Sunnyfield Farm.
264
00:13:37,167 --> 00:13:39,334
That sounds like a swell place for kids.
265
00:13:39,334 --> 00:13:43,300
Oh, no! That's for older people,
266
00:13:43,300 --> 00:13:45,901
and they're all... you know,
267
00:13:45,901 --> 00:13:48,467
kinda happy.
268
00:13:52,734 --> 00:13:54,567
Well, Edith, that's it.
269
00:13:54,567 --> 00:13:56,334
We're down to the bottom of the barrel,
270
00:13:56,334 --> 00:13:59,267
which means, the cops. I gotta call 'em.
271
00:13:59,267 --> 00:14:00,834
Oh, no! Please don't do that, Archie.
272
00:14:00,834 --> 00:14:02,133
What are you gonna do?
273
00:14:02,133 --> 00:14:04,300
The cops'll know exactly
who I should call--
274
00:14:04,300 --> 00:14:05,968
- EDITH: No! No!
- ARCHIE: Edith! Edith! Edith!
275
00:14:05,968 --> 00:14:09,701
ARCHIE: I cannot have
this kid in this house!
276
00:14:09,701 --> 00:14:12,934
[ARCHIE AND EDITH ARGUE]
277
00:14:12,934 --> 00:14:14,234
Edith, Edith, give me the phone.
278
00:14:14,234 --> 00:14:16,367
- Come on now. - No, you ain't gonna do it.
279
00:14:16,367 --> 00:14:18,634
- No! No! - Edith, Edith, come on.
280
00:14:18,634 --> 00:14:20,567
[BOTH SHOUTING]
281
00:14:21,667 --> 00:14:22,934
Edith, give me the--
282
00:14:25,968 --> 00:14:30,300
Edith, do you realize how this would look
283
00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:33,834
if the neighbors strolled in?
284
00:14:33,834 --> 00:14:36,934
I ain't ashamed of what I'm doin'.
285
00:14:36,934 --> 00:14:41,133
Oh, gee! The back of my knee, Edith!
286
00:14:41,133 --> 00:14:42,501
All right, all right, all right.
287
00:14:42,501 --> 00:14:43,734
- I give up! - All right.
288
00:14:43,734 --> 00:14:45,601
Come on, get me out of this thing!
289
00:14:45,601 --> 00:14:47,167
All right. I'll unravel us right now--
290
00:14:47,167 --> 00:14:48,267
Oh!
291
00:14:50,634 --> 00:14:51,734
Archie...
292
00:14:51,734 --> 00:14:53,567
give me the phone.
293
00:14:53,567 --> 00:14:55,734
Edith, this is ridiculous.
294
00:14:55,734 --> 00:14:58,467
You know that I'm gonna be
able to make phone calls
295
00:14:58,467 --> 00:15:01,834
someplace else, Edith, even if
I have to go down to the bar.
296
00:15:01,834 --> 00:15:04,334
- No, Archie. You ain't--
- I'll run down to the gas station.
297
00:15:04,334 --> 00:15:06,100
- Come on in the kitchen.
- This is so stupid.
298
00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:08,200
I'll get you a nice beer,
299
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,667
- and you'll feel much better. Sit down now.
- I'm gonna do it, Edith.
300
00:15:10,667 --> 00:15:12,767
I don't know why you fight
me on this thing, Edith.
301
00:15:12,767 --> 00:15:14,133
[WEARILY] Archie!
302
00:15:14,133 --> 00:15:15,868
- Listen, listen, listen. - [SIGHS]
303
00:15:15,868 --> 00:15:17,734
Edith, Edith.
304
00:15:17,734 --> 00:15:19,968
Let's don't fight about this thing, huh?
305
00:15:19,968 --> 00:15:23,133
I mean, why can't we do what they do
306
00:15:23,133 --> 00:15:24,968
when the U.S. government
has a disagreement?
307
00:15:24,968 --> 00:15:26,367
You know, they vote on it.
308
00:15:26,367 --> 00:15:28,200
- Oh, yeah! All right! - Yeah, all right.
309
00:15:28,200 --> 00:15:30,000
- So we take a vote, all right? - Yeah.
310
00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:31,868
All right, I vote the kid goes.
311
00:15:31,868 --> 00:15:34,834
And I vote that she stays.
312
00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:36,167
Which is a tie.
313
00:15:36,167 --> 00:15:37,868
And in the case of a tie,
314
00:15:37,868 --> 00:15:41,868
the president always
casts the deciding vote.
315
00:15:41,868 --> 00:15:44,567
I vote she goes.
316
00:15:46,334 --> 00:15:48,901
Are you the president?
317
00:15:48,901 --> 00:15:52,100
Edith, I thought you knew that.
318
00:15:54,901 --> 00:15:57,467
Well, I didn't vote for you.
319
00:15:59,267 --> 00:16:00,234
Archie...
320
00:16:02,334 --> 00:16:05,601
EDITH: She's just staying for two weeks!
321
00:16:05,601 --> 00:16:07,033
ARCHIE: Two weeks?
322
00:16:07,033 --> 00:16:10,334
EDITH: Oh, I gotta remember to
leave a note for the milkman.
323
00:16:10,334 --> 00:16:14,934
Two extra quarts of
homogenizedmilk and some yogurt.
324
00:16:14,934 --> 00:16:16,968
ARCHIE: I hate yogurt.
325
00:16:22,334 --> 00:16:24,000
SPORTS COMMENTATOR:
...score the winning goal.
326
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,701
ARCHIE: Go!
327
00:16:25,701 --> 00:16:28,501
Now, Gunderson forthe home team...
328
00:16:28,501 --> 00:16:30,467
[LAUGHS]
329
00:16:30,467 --> 00:16:32,667
- He splits-- - [LAUGHS]
330
00:16:32,667 --> 00:16:33,934
...from the business endof the stick.
331
00:16:33,934 --> 00:16:35,200
Give it to him, Gunderson.
332
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:38,701
Hey, pay him back for
that earlobe he bit off.
333
00:16:38,701 --> 00:16:40,400
Hey, this guy Leveque just got married.
334
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,667
I hope there's enough of
him left to take home!
335
00:16:42,667 --> 00:16:43,667
[LAUGHS]
336
00:16:43,667 --> 00:16:46,067
[TELEPHONE RINGS]
337
00:16:46,067 --> 00:16:47,067
Archie's Place.
338
00:16:47,067 --> 00:16:50,100
Archie, Stephanie is gone!
339
00:16:50,100 --> 00:16:52,033
What, did her old man come and get her?
340
00:16:52,033 --> 00:16:54,133
No! She run away!
341
00:16:54,133 --> 00:16:56,801
She's out there all alone!
342
00:16:56,801 --> 00:16:59,434
Oh, my God! All alone?
343
00:16:59,434 --> 00:17:02,334
She took her suitcase and run away!
344
00:17:02,334 --> 00:17:05,167
She took her suitcase and run away?
345
00:17:05,167 --> 00:17:06,767
Who took her suitcase and run away?
346
00:17:06,767 --> 00:17:09,267
The kid took her suitcase and run away.
347
00:17:09,267 --> 00:17:10,300
Call the police!
348
00:17:10,300 --> 00:17:12,334
Don't tell me what to do, Harry, huh?
349
00:17:12,334 --> 00:17:14,667
Edith, call the police.
350
00:17:14,667 --> 00:17:17,667
Archie, I think she's on her way
351
00:17:17,667 --> 00:17:19,167
to Fort Lauderdale.
352
00:17:19,167 --> 00:17:21,868
Would you go down to the bus station?
353
00:17:21,868 --> 00:17:25,167
I'll stay here in caseshe
decides to come back.
354
00:17:25,167 --> 00:17:27,534
And call me, Archie,if you find her.
355
00:17:27,534 --> 00:17:29,234
I'll call you. I'll call you.
356
00:17:29,234 --> 00:17:32,100
- And call me if you don't find her!
- I'll call.
357
00:17:32,100 --> 00:17:33,834
The number is Ravenswood...
358
00:17:35,434 --> 00:17:39,033
Edith, I know our phone number.
359
00:17:39,033 --> 00:17:40,634
I'll call you.
360
00:17:40,634 --> 00:17:41,701
Good-bye.
361
00:17:42,801 --> 00:17:45,200
Okay, Harry. Take over.
362
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:47,033
I gotta get down to the bus station.
363
00:17:47,033 --> 00:17:48,934
Why don't you leave it to the cops?
364
00:17:48,934 --> 00:17:50,267
The cops?
365
00:17:50,267 --> 00:17:53,033
The cops can't find a big
guy like Jimmy Hoffa.
366
00:17:53,033 --> 00:17:54,801
How they gonna find a little girl?
367
00:18:07,234 --> 00:18:09,300
[SIGHS]
368
00:18:27,167 --> 00:18:28,534
Hey there, chief.
369
00:18:29,934 --> 00:18:32,133
Want some fun?
370
00:18:32,133 --> 00:18:35,100
I don't like fun. I'm a maniac.
371
00:18:36,767 --> 00:18:39,267
MAN OVER P.A.: 8:30, Somerset line.
372
00:18:39,267 --> 00:18:41,400
Westfield route.Stopping at Elizabeth,
373
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,801
Hillside, Linden,Russell Park,
374
00:18:43,801 --> 00:18:47,033
Cranford, Westfield,now
boarding on ramp 12.
375
00:18:48,534 --> 00:18:50,934
Uh, hey, you gonna keep sittin' there?
376
00:18:56,934 --> 00:18:58,567
Excuse me.
377
00:18:58,567 --> 00:19:02,133
Hey, kiddo, you never should've
escaped from that hospital
378
00:19:02,133 --> 00:19:04,100
with that raging scarlet fever.
379
00:19:11,801 --> 00:19:14,133
Is that you behind that magazine?
380
00:19:14,133 --> 00:19:16,501
Nope.
381
00:19:16,501 --> 00:19:19,701
What do you mean no? That's you!
382
00:19:19,701 --> 00:19:21,267
Come on, now.
383
00:19:21,267 --> 00:19:23,501
Hey, you hadn't oughta run away from home
384
00:19:23,501 --> 00:19:24,868
that way tonight.
385
00:19:24,868 --> 00:19:26,767
See, 'cause that puts me in the wrong.
386
00:19:26,767 --> 00:19:29,601
That's my house you run away from there.
387
00:19:29,601 --> 00:19:33,467
Means that I'm contributin'
to the, uh, what do you call,
388
00:19:33,467 --> 00:19:35,467
the "loosensy" of a child.
389
00:19:38,334 --> 00:19:40,300
I mean, I could get in big trouble.
390
00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:42,767
I wouldn't tell on you.
391
00:19:42,767 --> 00:19:44,934
Oh! Hey, listen, kiddo.
392
00:19:44,934 --> 00:19:47,300
The cops got ways of making you talk.
393
00:19:47,300 --> 00:19:48,634
How?
394
00:19:48,634 --> 00:19:50,801
Oh, I don't know.
395
00:19:50,801 --> 00:19:53,033
Maybe--maybe they'd shine a light
396
00:19:53,033 --> 00:19:55,534
in your face all night, ya know?
397
00:19:55,534 --> 00:19:57,667
Or maybe one of them hold your dolly
398
00:19:57,667 --> 00:20:00,834
while two more would knock
you around a while.
399
00:20:00,834 --> 00:20:03,300
What would they do to you?
400
00:20:03,300 --> 00:20:06,934
Oh! I could get time, you know?
401
00:20:06,934 --> 00:20:09,834
Maybe five to ten years up in Dannemora,
402
00:20:09,834 --> 00:20:13,734
where I'd probably lead
a bunch of tough guys
403
00:20:13,734 --> 00:20:16,067
trying to bust out, you know?
404
00:20:16,067 --> 00:20:18,701
I'd get mowed down by the screws.
405
00:20:21,000 --> 00:20:25,067
And then, what would your Aunt
Edith do with no husband?
406
00:20:25,067 --> 00:20:27,601
Get another one.
407
00:20:28,767 --> 00:20:30,234
Oh, oh, oh.
408
00:20:30,234 --> 00:20:31,334
What do you think?
409
00:20:31,334 --> 00:20:34,133
A woman can get another man like that?
410
00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:36,434
My mother did.
411
00:20:39,000 --> 00:20:40,701
Hey, listen.
412
00:20:40,701 --> 00:20:45,200
Why did your mother run
away from your father?
413
00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:50,167
She told me she got tired of hearing
his voice and looking at his face.
414
00:20:50,167 --> 00:20:52,868
Oh, geez.
415
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:56,400
Well, your mother had no right
416
00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:58,067
to tell you a thing like that.
417
00:20:58,067 --> 00:21:00,400
Why not?
418
00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:05,334
Because a child should
never be told the truth.
419
00:21:05,334 --> 00:21:07,300
Especially about parents.
420
00:21:07,300 --> 00:21:10,200
She could've told you something nice.
421
00:21:10,200 --> 00:21:11,467
Like, she could've said
422
00:21:11,467 --> 00:21:15,200
that, uh, she went away
for a while on a trip
423
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,033
for her health, you know?
424
00:21:18,033 --> 00:21:20,467
And then, later on, when she come back,
425
00:21:20,467 --> 00:21:22,767
she could tell you that she got better.
426
00:21:22,767 --> 00:21:24,868
She couldn't come back.
427
00:21:24,868 --> 00:21:26,400
Why not?
428
00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:29,501
She was killed in a car accident.
429
00:21:45,367 --> 00:21:46,434
Well...
430
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:49,000
Uh...
431
00:21:49,000 --> 00:21:52,167
Listen, Rose Marie...
432
00:21:52,167 --> 00:21:53,734
Stephanie.
433
00:21:53,734 --> 00:21:56,100
Whatever.
434
00:21:56,100 --> 00:21:58,567
You can't take no bus tonight.
435
00:21:58,567 --> 00:22:02,434
I know. I only got $1.85.
436
00:22:02,434 --> 00:22:04,501
Then why did you come to the bus station?
437
00:22:04,501 --> 00:22:07,133
After a while, somebody notices me,
438
00:22:07,133 --> 00:22:09,667
and they take me to the children's shelter.
439
00:22:09,667 --> 00:22:11,067
And then in a few months,
440
00:22:11,067 --> 00:22:13,133
my father comes and gets me again.
441
00:22:14,868 --> 00:22:17,801
But why don't he leave you in
the shelter in the first place?
442
00:22:17,801 --> 00:22:19,701
He's not allowed to.
443
00:22:19,701 --> 00:22:21,601
MAN OVER P.A.: 9:00, Short Line bus.
444
00:22:21,601 --> 00:22:24,133
Poughkeepsie route,stopping at Paramus,
445
00:22:24,133 --> 00:22:26,100
Newburgh, Fishkill,Poughkeepsie,
446
00:22:26,100 --> 00:22:27,667
now boarding on ramp two.
447
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:36,834
Uh... tell you what we do, kiddo.
448
00:22:36,834 --> 00:22:39,434
You and me, we go find a telephone
449
00:22:39,434 --> 00:22:40,634
and call up your Aunt Edith.
450
00:22:40,634 --> 00:22:42,567
And then the two of us we go on home, huh?
451
00:22:42,567 --> 00:22:44,467
Aren't you still mad at me?
452
00:22:44,467 --> 00:22:47,834
When was I ever mad at you?
453
00:22:47,834 --> 00:22:49,767
I was just saying to
your Aunt Edith tonight,
454
00:22:49,767 --> 00:22:51,734
wouldn't it be nice to have
a little girl like you
455
00:22:51,734 --> 00:22:53,234
around the house for a couple of weeks?
456
00:22:53,234 --> 00:22:55,234
That isn't what I heard you say.
457
00:22:58,567 --> 00:23:00,701
Hey. Listen.
458
00:23:03,467 --> 00:23:06,834
If you was eavesdrippin'...
459
00:23:06,834 --> 00:23:11,534
that there is a very defensive thing to do.
460
00:23:14,067 --> 00:23:18,467
But this time, I forgive you.
461
00:23:20,634 --> 00:23:24,133
Now, what do you say you and me,
we go and have a soda, huh?
462
00:23:26,300 --> 00:23:28,400
And some chewing gum, too?
463
00:23:29,868 --> 00:23:31,501
Yeah, sure.
464
00:23:31,501 --> 00:23:33,100
Okay.
465
00:23:33,100 --> 00:23:36,167
Okay. Come on, huh?
466
00:23:36,167 --> 00:23:38,767
Can I have a new comic book, too?
467
00:23:40,334 --> 00:23:42,300
Oh, geez.
468
00:23:42,300 --> 00:23:45,033
You made them all the same, Lord.
469
00:23:45,033 --> 00:23:48,734
Give 'em an inch...
470
00:23:48,734 --> 00:23:50,701
Yeah. Come on.
471
00:23:51,968 --> 00:23:54,167
Don't look at nobody goin' out, hear me?
472
00:23:54,167 --> 00:23:55,968
You might catch somethin'.
473
00:24:21,300 --> 00:24:23,167
[
]
474
00:24:35,467 --> 00:24:38,167
All in the Family was
playedto a studio audience
475
00:24:38,167 --> 00:24:40,501
for live responses.
476
00:24:40,551 --> 00:24:45,101
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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