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1
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♪ Boy, the way
Glenn Miller played ♪
2
00:00:05,671 --> 00:00:09,140
♪ songs that made
the hit parade ♪
3
00:00:09,208 --> 00:00:12,744
♪ guys like us
we had it made ♪
4
00:00:12,812 --> 00:00:16,081
[ together ]
♪ those were the days ♪
5
00:00:16,148 --> 00:00:19,350
♪ and you knew where you were then ♪
6
00:00:19,418 --> 00:00:23,387
[ Archie ]
♪ girls were girls and men were men ♪
7
00:00:23,455 --> 00:00:25,757
[ Archie, Edith ]
♪ mister, we could use a man ♪
8
00:00:25,825 --> 00:00:29,661
♪ like Herbert hoover again ♪
9
00:00:29,729 --> 00:00:33,031
[ Archie ]
♪ didn't need no welfare state ♪
10
00:00:33,099 --> 00:00:36,334
[ Edith ]
♪ everybody pulled his weight ♪
11
00:00:36,401 --> 00:00:40,538
[ Archie, Edith ]
♪ gee, our old lasalle ran great ♪
12
00:00:40,606 --> 00:00:45,677
♪ those were the days ♪
13
00:00:58,590 --> 00:01:00,625
hey, did anybody see
the sports section?
14
00:01:00,693 --> 00:01:02,894
Oh, daddy probably took it
with him this morning.
15
00:01:02,962 --> 00:01:06,131
Took it where?
In the cab. He's moonlighting again.
16
00:01:06,198 --> 00:01:08,299
"Moonlighting."
Tsk.
17
00:01:08,367 --> 00:01:11,870
That sounds so much more
romantic than saying,
18
00:01:11,937 --> 00:01:14,105
"he's driving
Mr. munson's cab...
19
00:01:14,173 --> 00:01:17,175
To pick up a few
extra bucks."
20
00:01:22,014 --> 00:01:25,516
Gee, thanks for
the big hello. Hi, daddy.
21
00:01:25,584 --> 00:01:28,419
[ Edith ] Hello, Archie.
Hey, arch, where's the sports section?
22
00:01:28,487 --> 00:01:31,455
Oh, beautiful, beautiful.
Listen to that, huh?
23
00:01:31,523 --> 00:01:34,893
I'm out hacking around
this town, doing two jobs,
24
00:01:34,960 --> 00:01:37,495
the meathead sits here
on his butt,
25
00:01:37,563 --> 00:01:40,298
says to me, "where's
the sports section?"
26
00:01:40,365 --> 00:01:42,633
Get out of the chair!
27
00:01:44,904 --> 00:01:46,838
And, Edith,
28
00:01:46,906 --> 00:01:50,274
suppose there's any chance
of having a cup of coffee over here, huh?
29
00:01:50,342 --> 00:01:53,578
Oh, sure, Archie.
How was your day?
30
00:01:53,645 --> 00:01:55,947
Oh, like lots
of days, Edith:
31
00:01:56,015 --> 00:01:57,949
Lousy.
32
00:01:58,017 --> 00:02:00,151
Except for one little
bright spot that made the day...
33
00:02:00,219 --> 00:02:02,220
What you might call
fascinating.
34
00:02:02,287 --> 00:02:06,257
- "Fascinating"?
- What's the matter? Don't you like that word?
35
00:02:07,526 --> 00:02:10,294
Guess what famous
and important personality...
36
00:02:10,362 --> 00:02:12,663
I carried as a passenger
in my cab today?
37
00:02:12,732 --> 00:02:16,467
- Oh, tell us!
- Oh, no, no. You ain't gonna get it out of me that easy.
38
00:02:16,535 --> 00:02:18,603
Come on. You gotta
guess for this one.
39
00:02:18,670 --> 00:02:21,740
All right. Let's try.
I'll go first.
40
00:02:21,807 --> 00:02:23,808
Living or dead?
41
00:02:32,684 --> 00:02:36,287
I was driving a cab, Edith,
not a hearse.
42
00:02:36,355 --> 00:02:38,790
Go back to
your solitaire, huh?
43
00:02:38,858 --> 00:02:41,126
Give us a hint, daddy.
Is he in show business?
44
00:02:41,193 --> 00:02:43,361
Bingo.
Give you another hint.
45
00:02:43,428 --> 00:02:45,496
"Bongo, bongo, bongo."
46
00:02:45,564 --> 00:02:48,399
Well, he's either desi arnaz
or, knowing you,
47
00:02:48,467 --> 00:02:50,468
he's probably black.
48
00:02:51,536 --> 00:02:53,638
Right.
49
00:02:53,705 --> 00:02:56,707
Black as the ace of spades.
50
00:02:56,776 --> 00:03:01,312
In fact, as far as I'm
concerned, this guy isthe ace of spades.
51
00:03:02,648 --> 00:03:05,349
For goodness sakes.
Archie!
52
00:03:05,417 --> 00:03:10,588
You just said "ace of spades"
and I turned up the ace of spades.
53
00:03:10,656 --> 00:03:13,124
You see that in the movies,
and you say,
54
00:03:13,192 --> 00:03:15,894
"that wouldn't happen
in real life."
55
00:03:15,961 --> 00:03:20,064
But here we are
in real life, and it happened.
56
00:03:21,700 --> 00:03:25,804
We're in real life
over here, Edith. Would you care to join us?
57
00:03:27,706 --> 00:03:30,775
Was it flip Wilson?
No, no, no.
58
00:03:30,843 --> 00:03:32,443
Belafonte?
59
00:03:32,511 --> 00:03:36,347
No, I said black, meathead.
Harvey Belafonte ain't black.
60
00:03:39,885 --> 00:03:42,720
He's just a good-looking
white guy dipped in caramel.
61
00:03:51,630 --> 00:03:53,698
I'll give youse
one more hint, and that's all.
62
00:03:53,765 --> 00:03:55,666
You ready?
63
00:03:55,734 --> 00:03:57,668
♪ Hey, there ♪
64
00:03:57,736 --> 00:04:01,239
♪ you with the star
in your eyes ♪
65
00:04:02,241 --> 00:04:05,109
Rosemary clooney is black?
66
00:04:07,847 --> 00:04:11,115
Daddy, you had
Sammy Davis Jr. in your cab?
67
00:04:11,183 --> 00:04:13,251
As sure as you're
sitting there.
68
00:04:13,319 --> 00:04:16,754
Could you give us
just one more hint?
69
00:04:17,957 --> 00:04:20,959
Could you just play cards
with yourself?
70
00:04:21,026 --> 00:04:23,194
Arch, are you sure
it was Sammy Davis Jr.?
71
00:04:23,262 --> 00:04:26,030
No, meathead.
It was some zulu jockey.
72
00:04:27,266 --> 00:04:29,700
I know the man.
Besides, who would give me...
73
00:04:29,768 --> 00:04:33,137
A five-buck tip
for a buck-and-a-quarter haul, anyway?
74
00:04:33,205 --> 00:04:35,639
And as fine a gentleman
as ever you'd want to meet.
75
00:04:35,707 --> 00:04:39,010
Sat in the back of the cab,
talked to be about the weather, all kinds of things,
76
00:04:39,078 --> 00:04:41,312
just like a regular person.
77
00:04:44,149 --> 00:04:47,651
Fact, if it weren't for
the rearview mirror there, I'd have thought he was a white guy.
78
00:04:47,719 --> 00:04:50,454
Arch! Why do you got to say
things like that for?
79
00:04:50,522 --> 00:04:54,092
What do you mean, "why do I got
to say things like that for"? What did I say, anyhow?
80
00:04:54,159 --> 00:04:56,895
Would you listen to these two?
You can't say nothin' around here.
81
00:04:56,962 --> 00:04:59,264
They twist around
everything you say.
82
00:04:59,331 --> 00:05:02,967
Oh, Edith. You know what?
I gave him our names and address...
83
00:05:03,035 --> 00:05:05,503
So he can send us
an autographed picture of himself.
84
00:05:05,570 --> 00:05:07,705
Sammy Davis Jr.?
Yeah.
85
00:05:07,773 --> 00:05:09,941
Oh, that's wonderful!
86
00:05:10,009 --> 00:05:12,476
Did you tell him
how much I like him?
87
00:05:12,544 --> 00:05:16,247
Oh, sure, Edith.
That was the first thing I said to him.
88
00:05:16,315 --> 00:05:19,384
Oh, I said, "Sam,
you don't have to worry none about your career...
89
00:05:19,451 --> 00:05:23,288
'Cause Edith bunker
is right behind you."
90
00:05:23,355 --> 00:05:25,890
I bet he was glad
to hear that.
91
00:05:25,958 --> 00:05:28,759
[ Phone ringing ]
92
00:05:28,827 --> 00:05:30,761
Hello.
93
00:05:32,798 --> 00:05:34,966
Who is this?
94
00:05:35,034 --> 00:05:36,968
Huh?
95
00:05:37,036 --> 00:05:40,238
Uh, hold the phone, will you?
Hold the phone just a minute.
96
00:05:40,306 --> 00:05:42,540
You know who I was just
talking about right here?
97
00:05:42,607 --> 00:05:45,843
I was just talking about
Sammy Davis Jr., right? He's on the telephone right now!
98
00:05:45,911 --> 00:05:48,179
Daddy!
He's on the telephone?
99
00:05:48,247 --> 00:05:51,916
He is! Shh!
Tell him I'm still behind him.
100
00:05:54,353 --> 00:05:57,055
Will you leave me alone?
101
00:05:57,122 --> 00:05:59,623
Uh, hello, Mr. Davis.
I'm sorry there,
102
00:05:59,691 --> 00:06:02,660
but I was just a little startled
about being called out of the ordinary that way.
103
00:06:02,727 --> 00:06:05,129
Yeah.
What can I do for you?
104
00:06:06,398 --> 00:06:09,567
Oh, that fancy briefcase
was yours, huh?
105
00:06:09,634 --> 00:06:13,804
Well, listen, I turned it in
at the cab office there.
106
00:06:13,872 --> 00:06:17,675
Oh, geez, had all your important
contracts and everything in there, huh?
107
00:06:17,742 --> 00:06:21,145
Well, how could I help you
get it back?
108
00:06:21,213 --> 00:06:24,382
Well, no, no, wait a minute.
You say you're going out to the airport.
109
00:06:24,450 --> 00:06:28,186
That's good, because I can
have the briefcase delivered here from the cab office,
110
00:06:28,253 --> 00:06:30,989
and my house is
kind of on the way, off northern boulevard there.
111
00:06:31,056 --> 00:06:33,958
You can stop by here
and pick it up.
112
00:06:34,026 --> 00:06:37,996
You want to do that?
Huh? Hey!
113
00:06:38,063 --> 00:06:40,531
No, it'll be an honor,
Mr. Davis. Certainly.
114
00:06:40,599 --> 00:06:42,533
704 hauser street.
115
00:06:42,601 --> 00:06:45,536
Yeah. Yes, sir, Mr. Davis.
Yes, sir, Mr. Davis.
116
00:06:45,604 --> 00:06:47,938
Yeah. Good-bye.
He's coming over here.
117
00:06:48,007 --> 00:06:50,741
[ All shouting ]
118
00:06:50,809 --> 00:06:53,244
He's coming over here.
Put a lid on it!
119
00:06:55,147 --> 00:06:58,049
He traced me from the address
I give him to send us the picture.
120
00:06:58,117 --> 00:07:00,284
You know where
he was calling us from? No. Where?
121
00:07:00,352 --> 00:07:04,288
A car. That's right.
He's in a limousine right now with a phone in it.
122
00:07:04,356 --> 00:07:07,958
Oh, I want to tell you,
some of these coloreds are real classy.
123
00:07:08,027 --> 00:07:10,495
When they've got it,
they spend it.
124
00:07:10,562 --> 00:07:13,097
I've got to call
munson right now. I got to go fix my face!
125
00:07:13,165 --> 00:07:16,100
Arch, what do you mean,
"some of these coloreds are classy"?
126
00:07:16,168 --> 00:07:18,669
Why do you always have
to label black people this or that?
127
00:07:18,737 --> 00:07:23,508
Because when they deserve
a compliment once in a while, I don't hold it back.
128
00:07:25,411 --> 00:07:28,479
Now will you get
away from me? [ Gibberish ]
129
00:07:28,547 --> 00:07:31,149
This and that.
Dummy up.
130
00:07:31,216 --> 00:07:34,385
Uh, munson,
Archie bunker here.
131
00:07:34,453 --> 00:07:38,622
Hey, that fancy leather
suitcase I turned in--
132
00:07:38,690 --> 00:07:41,859
yeah, well, I'm just
on the phone with the owner now,
133
00:07:41,927 --> 00:07:44,195
and I've arranged that
he's gonna pick it up here at the house,
134
00:07:44,263 --> 00:07:46,431
so could you
bring it over?
135
00:07:46,498 --> 00:07:50,234
No, no. We don't want to
do that, munson, because this is a very, very important guy.
136
00:07:50,302 --> 00:07:52,870
I mean, a biggie.
Yeah.
137
00:07:52,938 --> 00:07:55,273
Oh, you'll find out
when you get here.
138
00:07:55,340 --> 00:07:58,676
Bring it over, though, huh?
Good. Good. Great. Bye.
139
00:07:58,743 --> 00:08:01,446
Okay, it's all set,
it's all set. Now, Edith, please.
140
00:08:01,513 --> 00:08:04,748
Don't go blabbing all over
the neighborhood that Sammy Davis Jr.'s coming here.
141
00:08:04,816 --> 00:08:06,917
The house is gonna be
a mob scene. All right, Archie.
142
00:08:06,985 --> 00:08:08,919
And don't say nothing
to Lionel about this.
143
00:08:08,987 --> 00:08:11,021
If he finds out,
he'll jump on his tom-tom.
144
00:08:11,090 --> 00:08:14,192
Before you know it,
we'll be up to our armpits in jungle bunnies.
145
00:08:16,861 --> 00:08:19,730
Arch, when Sammy Davis
gets here, you gonna call him a jungle bunny?
146
00:08:19,798 --> 00:08:24,569
Of course not, you dumbbell.
I'm gonna call him Mr. Davis.
147
00:08:24,636 --> 00:08:27,205
Just a minute ago he was
the ace of spades. Now he's Mr. Davis?
148
00:08:27,272 --> 00:08:31,175
Because he worked himself up
to being called Mr. Davis, and he deserves that,
149
00:08:31,243 --> 00:08:34,945
because in this great country,
a man can overcome the unequalness of his color...
150
00:08:35,013 --> 00:08:37,181
And rise to become
a great star.
151
00:08:38,550 --> 00:08:40,485
Arch, what do you mean,
"unequalness"?
152
00:08:40,552 --> 00:08:44,188
What's the difference between
our neighbor Lionel Jefferson and Sammy Davis Jr.?
153
00:08:44,256 --> 00:08:46,957
Ten million dollars
and five purple Cadillacs.
154
00:08:49,194 --> 00:08:51,362
Yeah. Bye-bye.
155
00:08:51,430 --> 00:08:53,831
Wait a minute.
Who were you just calling here?
156
00:08:53,898 --> 00:08:58,068
Mabel Hefner.
She ain't never seen a star up close.
157
00:08:58,137 --> 00:09:00,671
Well, she ain't
gonna see one. Not in this house.
158
00:09:00,739 --> 00:09:03,307
You get on the blower
and tell her, "April fool."
159
00:09:03,375 --> 00:09:05,443
I can't.
She ain't home.
160
00:09:05,511 --> 00:09:07,745
Well, who was you
just talking to here?
161
00:09:07,812 --> 00:09:09,747
Her husband, Barney Hefner.
162
00:09:09,814 --> 00:09:13,551
Oh, Barney the bonehead.
Oh, he won't tell nobody.
163
00:09:13,619 --> 00:09:16,120
All right, Edith.
All right. What's done is done.
164
00:09:16,188 --> 00:09:18,689
But just do this
for me, huh? A favor.
165
00:09:18,757 --> 00:09:21,959
When Sammy Davis Jr.
gets here, whatever else you blab about,
166
00:09:22,027 --> 00:09:25,163
don't say nothing
about his eye, huh? What eye?
167
00:09:25,230 --> 00:09:28,766
Edith, let me tell you.
See, one of them is glass.
168
00:09:28,833 --> 00:09:31,769
You'll find out
when he gets here which of them, see?
169
00:09:31,836 --> 00:09:35,105
But don't talk about it,
all right? Huh? Will you remember that?
170
00:09:35,174 --> 00:09:37,741
Yeah.
All right. Now, you got any fried chicken in the kitchen?
171
00:09:37,809 --> 00:09:40,611
'Cause they like to
snack on that.
172
00:09:40,679 --> 00:09:43,548
- [ Doorbell rings ]- I'll get it. I'll get the door.
173
00:09:43,615 --> 00:09:48,118
He's here !
Get away from the door, will ya? Get back there!
174
00:09:48,187 --> 00:09:51,689
What's the matter with youse?
I'll answer it.
175
00:09:51,756 --> 00:09:54,258
Hi, Mr. bunker.
Oh, hi, Lionel. Look.
176
00:09:54,326 --> 00:09:56,860
We got a private
matter going on. Could you come back later?
177
00:09:56,928 --> 00:09:59,863
Yeah, Sammy Davis Jr.
is coming over.
178
00:10:00,932 --> 00:10:03,834
The dingbat strikes again.
179
00:10:03,902 --> 00:10:07,572
What's going on?
Lionel, Sammy Davis Jr. left his briefcase in daddy's cab,
180
00:10:07,639 --> 00:10:10,541
and he's coming by here
to pick it up! He's coming here?
181
00:10:10,609 --> 00:10:12,876
[ Doorbell rings ][ All talking at once ]
182
00:10:12,944 --> 00:10:16,581
Get back, all of youse!
Get way back over there!
183
00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:21,819
'Cause I'm the guy
that found him.
184
00:10:24,556 --> 00:10:27,592
What's the matter with youse?
You'd think it was the second coming. I'll open it up!
185
00:10:27,659 --> 00:10:31,629
Just calm yourselves down.
He's an ordinary human being like the rest of us, huh?
186
00:10:31,697 --> 00:10:33,931
Shh!
187
00:10:33,998 --> 00:10:35,933
Mr. bunker?
188
00:10:37,669 --> 00:10:40,371
Sammy Davis!
Sammy Davis! There he is!
189
00:10:40,439 --> 00:10:43,874
I told you he was coming!
There he is, right out there on the stoop!
190
00:10:43,942 --> 00:10:47,077
Come on in, Mr. Davis.
Oh, Mr. Davis, it's an honor.
191
00:10:47,145 --> 00:10:49,179
Oh! Oh!
192
00:10:50,415 --> 00:10:52,916
Welcome to our house!
Thank you.
193
00:10:52,984 --> 00:10:55,453
I'm so excited!
But then, you can't imagine,
194
00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:58,623
'cause you never had
to meet yourself.
195
00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:04,428
Mr. Davis, uh,
this is my wife, Edith, laughing over there.
196
00:11:04,496 --> 00:11:06,764
Ha-ha.
Shut up.
197
00:11:08,634 --> 00:11:11,736
Mr. Davis, my daughter,
Gloria, standing over there.
198
00:11:11,803 --> 00:11:13,738
Hello, Gloria.
How do you do?
199
00:11:13,805 --> 00:11:15,740
And her husband,Mike.Hello, Mike.
200
00:11:15,807 --> 00:11:18,142
No! No!
201
00:11:28,186 --> 00:11:30,120
This here is, uh--
202
00:11:30,188 --> 00:11:33,223
this is only Lionel.
He lives next door.
203
00:11:33,292 --> 00:11:36,394
My daughter's married to
the white guy over here.
204
00:11:36,461 --> 00:11:39,163
How are you?
205
00:11:39,230 --> 00:11:41,499
It certainly is nice
to meet all of you nice people,
206
00:11:41,566 --> 00:11:43,934
but I think I'd better take
the old briefcase and run.
207
00:11:44,002 --> 00:11:45,936
And incidentally,
Mr. bunker,
208
00:11:46,004 --> 00:11:48,339
here's a little something
for your-- for your trouble.
209
00:11:48,407 --> 00:11:52,610
Oh, geez.
Twenty dollars. Oh, no, Mr. Davis.
210
00:11:52,678 --> 00:11:54,912
Archie don't need
no reward...
211
00:11:54,979 --> 00:11:57,247
For doing something
for you.
212
00:11:57,316 --> 00:12:00,685
Edith, don't insult
the guest in your own home, huh?
213
00:12:00,752 --> 00:12:03,220
She don't know what
she's saying there, Mr. Davis.
214
00:12:06,391 --> 00:12:08,592
And, uh, listen.
I just put in a call.
215
00:12:08,660 --> 00:12:11,662
The briefcase is coming
over. Be here any minute. All right.
216
00:12:11,730 --> 00:12:13,864
Well, in the meantime,
will you make yourself at home, huh?
217
00:12:13,932 --> 00:12:15,933
We get you some coffee?
Well, that's awfully nice of you.
218
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,168
Sit right down here,
Mr. Davis. Right in my chair.
219
00:12:18,236 --> 00:12:20,338
Make yourself comfortable.
It's the best in the house.
220
00:12:20,405 --> 00:12:23,140
Listen, Mr. Davis, I got to
tell my mother you're here. She's crazy about you.
221
00:12:23,208 --> 00:12:25,409
Lionel, don't go, huh?
Lionel!
222
00:12:26,878 --> 00:12:29,547
Come on, youse two.
Get over here.
223
00:12:29,614 --> 00:12:31,615
Edith, make
the coffee, huh?
224
00:12:31,683 --> 00:12:35,052
And Edith--
excuse me, Mr. Davis. Edith, Edith, Edith.
225
00:12:35,119 --> 00:12:37,221
Remember, huh?
Nothing about mm-mmm!
226
00:12:37,288 --> 00:12:40,391
Well, Mr. Davis,
I want to tell you,
227
00:12:40,459 --> 00:12:42,660
it's a real honor
to have you in our home,
228
00:12:42,728 --> 00:12:44,895
thank you.
Breaking bread with us this way.
229
00:12:44,963 --> 00:12:47,097
I was just saying
to my family before you came in,
230
00:12:47,165 --> 00:12:51,168
I said, "Sammy Davis Jr.
is maybe the greatest credit to his race."
231
00:12:51,236 --> 00:12:55,339
Well, thank you very much.
I'm sure you've done good for yours too.
232
00:12:58,877 --> 00:13:01,111
I try.
233
00:13:01,179 --> 00:13:04,782
Here we are!
Ah, thank you, Mrs. bunker.
234
00:13:04,850 --> 00:13:07,918
Thanks, Edith.
That's all right. I can serve Mr. Davis.
235
00:13:07,986 --> 00:13:10,220
Edith, get out of here.
236
00:13:11,656 --> 00:13:15,426
Now, Mr. Davis,
do you take cream and sugar in your eye?
237
00:13:26,838 --> 00:13:29,507
Mr. Davis,
it's really my fault.
238
00:13:29,574 --> 00:13:33,210
You see, Archie thought
I was gonna say something about your eye.
239
00:13:33,278 --> 00:13:35,813
Edith, please.
240
00:13:35,881 --> 00:13:38,516
Mr. Davis, could we maybe
offer you something maybe a little stronger?
241
00:13:38,583 --> 00:13:40,785
A little fleischmann's
and ginger, very smooth?
242
00:13:40,852 --> 00:13:43,921
Oh, no, Mr. bunker. This is
fine. As a matter of fact, I'm off the sauce.
243
00:13:43,988 --> 00:13:45,956
Booze is a definite
no-no for me.
244
00:13:46,024 --> 00:13:48,893
[ Giggling ]
I just love the way you talk.
245
00:13:48,960 --> 00:13:52,095
I mean, this must seem
so dull after Hollywood and all.
246
00:13:52,163 --> 00:13:54,097
Oh, I don't know
about that, Gloria.
247
00:13:54,165 --> 00:13:56,700
There may be Wilder things
going on in new Rochelle than in Hollywood.
248
00:13:56,768 --> 00:13:59,336
What part of new Rochelle?
249
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:02,339
Edith!
250
00:14:02,407 --> 00:14:04,542
We got cousins there.
251
00:14:04,609 --> 00:14:06,544
They burn incense.
252
00:14:06,611 --> 00:14:09,513
Who cares?
I hate them anyway!
253
00:14:10,816 --> 00:14:12,750
Get me a beer, huh?
254
00:14:12,818 --> 00:14:15,285
And Edith, a glass
this time, huh?
255
00:14:15,353 --> 00:14:18,021
And open up a fresh box
of twinkies for Mr. Davis.
256
00:14:22,727 --> 00:14:24,795
Twinkies?
257
00:14:24,863 --> 00:14:27,431
Yeah, that's kind of
a wasp soul food.
258
00:14:29,100 --> 00:14:31,669
Uh, don't, uh, listen to him.
259
00:14:31,736 --> 00:14:34,104
He's kind of a meathead,
Mr. Davis.
260
00:14:34,172 --> 00:14:36,574
Look, why don't you stop
calling me Mr. Davis and just call me Sam?
261
00:14:36,641 --> 00:14:38,742
Oh, hey, I'd like
to do that. Okay.
262
00:14:38,810 --> 00:14:40,744
"Sam."
Yeah, that's nice.
263
00:14:40,812 --> 00:14:43,413
And you can call me Archie.
I mean, what the hell?
264
00:14:46,217 --> 00:14:51,489
Sam, where you flying
out to tonight? Las Vegas, maybe?
265
00:14:51,556 --> 00:14:53,757
No, I have a tv special
to do in Hollywood.
266
00:14:53,825 --> 00:14:56,293
Ohh. Gee,
that's beautiful. Yeah.
267
00:14:56,361 --> 00:14:58,762
Yeah. Well, while
you're hanging around,
268
00:14:58,830 --> 00:15:02,432
will you give us
a little preview, one of the songs you're gonna do?
269
00:15:02,501 --> 00:15:04,434
Daddy-y!
270
00:15:04,503 --> 00:15:07,771
Mr. Davis makes his living
entertaining. You're asking him to go to work.
271
00:15:07,839 --> 00:15:10,073
Yeah, arch. How would you
like to be a guest in somebody's house,
272
00:15:10,141 --> 00:15:13,644
and they said, "come on, arch.
Do some packing and lifting for us."
273
00:15:23,421 --> 00:15:25,455
Here's your beer, Archie.
274
00:15:25,524 --> 00:15:28,993
And here's your twinkie,
Mr. Davis.
275
00:15:31,596 --> 00:15:33,430
[ Mouths words ]
[ Doorbell rings ]
276
00:15:33,498 --> 00:15:36,099
Oh, that's some pest
at the front door. I'll get it.
277
00:15:36,167 --> 00:15:38,468
[ Doorbell buzzing ]
There goes the back door. Get that, Edith.
278
00:15:38,537 --> 00:15:41,338
You see? They're crawling
out of the woodwork now!
279
00:15:42,841 --> 00:15:45,776
Oh, look! Barney Hefner
with a camera! Where is he?
280
00:15:45,844 --> 00:15:49,179
Ha-ha! There he is!
Sammy Davis Jr.
281
00:15:49,247 --> 00:15:51,982
Can I have an autograph,
Mr. Davis? Aw, come on, Barney!
282
00:15:52,050 --> 00:15:53,984
Hey, just one
quick picture, huh?
283
00:15:54,052 --> 00:15:56,520
Now, Barney,
no pictures, huh? No, no, it's all right.
284
00:15:56,588 --> 00:15:59,089
Oh, yeah?
All right. Hold it.
285
00:16:03,261 --> 00:16:06,797
Hello, Mr. Davis,
this is Mrs. haskell and her daughter.
286
00:16:06,865 --> 00:16:09,166
I'll take it from here.
287
00:16:11,903 --> 00:16:15,539
Go, Clarissa.
Salute!
288
00:16:15,607 --> 00:16:18,275
She's only been studying
for six months.
289
00:16:18,342 --> 00:16:21,612
We don't want no
Fred mack amateurhour around here!
290
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,147
If you give her a chance,
you'll love her! I just know it!
291
00:16:24,215 --> 00:16:26,183
Get out of here!
Mom!
292
00:16:27,652 --> 00:16:29,753
[ Yells, indistinct ]
293
00:16:29,821 --> 00:16:33,891
Wait! Mrs. haskell!
You forgot your floor!
294
00:16:37,261 --> 00:16:40,397
Yeah. Hey, and now
I'd like to propose a toast.
295
00:16:40,465 --> 00:16:44,101
Uh-huh. To the greatest
entertainer in the world.
296
00:16:44,168 --> 00:16:47,471
And to the man who gave me
the opportunity of meeting him face to face,
297
00:16:47,538 --> 00:16:50,373
my good friend and neighbor,
Archie bunker.
298
00:16:50,441 --> 00:16:53,543
Hey, that ain't a bad toast,
Barney. I can drink to that one myself.
299
00:16:53,612 --> 00:16:57,047
I'm Barney Hefner.
I live across the street-- the house with the new porch.
300
00:16:57,115 --> 00:16:59,449
Oh, yeah.
301
00:16:59,517 --> 00:17:02,052
And not only the greatest
entertainer in the world,
302
00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:05,956
but a man who proved
there is good and bad in all races.
303
00:17:06,024 --> 00:17:08,458
[ Barney ]
Right. I'll drink to that.
304
00:17:10,595 --> 00:17:13,296
And to friendship.
[ Archie ] You hear that, huh?
305
00:17:13,364 --> 00:17:15,666
Isn't that nice?
"Friendship." I'll drink to that myself.
306
00:17:25,844 --> 00:17:28,012
What are you looking at,
Barney?
307
00:17:28,079 --> 00:17:31,815
You're done now.
Get the hell out of here! You're cranky today, Archie.
308
00:17:31,883 --> 00:17:35,819
There he is!
It's really him!
309
00:17:35,887 --> 00:17:40,090
Oh, and you're just
as cute as you look on television.
310
00:17:43,061 --> 00:17:45,195
God bless you.
Thank you.
311
00:17:45,263 --> 00:17:48,431
I don't want to take up
any more of your time. I just came to look at you.
312
00:17:48,499 --> 00:17:50,701
Thank you.
And I'm looking at you.
313
00:17:50,769 --> 00:17:52,770
Look at you!
314
00:17:52,837 --> 00:17:54,872
Now, I want to say this
right, Mr. Davis.
315
00:17:54,939 --> 00:17:57,141
Shalom l'Chaim.
316
00:18:01,079 --> 00:18:03,847
And l'Chaim shalom.
317
00:18:03,915 --> 00:18:06,516
Oh, Mr. Davis!
My goodness!
318
00:18:06,584 --> 00:18:09,319
Oh, Sammy Davis Jr.!
319
00:18:16,695 --> 00:18:19,529
You know, Sammy,
them words I just heard you saying here,
320
00:18:19,597 --> 00:18:22,099
they reminded me of something
that I always wanted to ask you.
321
00:18:22,167 --> 00:18:24,101
Yes, arch?
Yeah, now,
322
00:18:24,169 --> 00:18:27,037
you're being colored,
well, I know you had no choice in that.
323
00:18:30,909 --> 00:18:32,910
But whatever made you
turn Jew?
324
00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:38,415
Smile, everybody.
325
00:18:38,482 --> 00:18:41,318
Ah, come on, Barney?
What are you doing? I thought you went home.
326
00:18:41,385 --> 00:18:43,386
You're turning my house
into a peep show.
327
00:18:43,454 --> 00:18:48,158
I'm sorry, Mr. Davis.
Sometimes my father says the wrong things.
328
00:18:48,226 --> 00:18:50,260
Yeah, I've noticed that.
329
00:18:50,328 --> 00:18:52,996
But he's not a bad guy,
Mr. Davis. I mean, like,
330
00:18:53,064 --> 00:18:55,065
he'd never burn a cross
on your lawn.
331
00:18:55,133 --> 00:19:00,370
No, but if he saw one burning,
he's liable to toast a marshmallow on it.
332
00:19:02,107 --> 00:19:04,775
Ha-ha-ha-ha--
right on!
333
00:19:06,344 --> 00:19:08,678
This is your fault,
Edith.
334
00:19:08,747 --> 00:19:11,915
I had to throw
Barney Hefner out of here. Oh, Sammy,
335
00:19:11,983 --> 00:19:14,918
yes?
I was just remembering the last time I seen you on tv.
336
00:19:14,986 --> 00:19:17,087
It was on
the Johnny Carson show. Oh, yeah.
337
00:19:17,155 --> 00:19:19,356
You was on with that there,
uh, Raquel Walsh.
338
00:19:19,423 --> 00:19:22,292
- Yeah. Remember, Edith?
- Oh, yeah. I remember.
339
00:19:22,360 --> 00:19:25,963
Oh, you were so sweet
to her, Mr. Davis. Oh, thank you.
340
00:19:26,030 --> 00:19:28,866
Archie said he never thought
he'd see the day...
341
00:19:28,933 --> 00:19:32,970
When coloreds and whites
would be hugging and kissing coast to coast.
342
00:19:40,779 --> 00:19:45,048
When I ask you a question,
why can't you just say "yeah" and stop?
343
00:19:45,116 --> 00:19:47,918
Now, will you sit
over there, huh?
344
00:19:47,986 --> 00:19:50,287
And don't say nothin'
till you're asked.
345
00:19:50,354 --> 00:19:54,357
Sammy, she takes everything
I say out of context, see, 'cause what I really meant was--
346
00:19:54,425 --> 00:19:57,761
I know what you mean,
Archie, but you see, it's not me.
347
00:19:57,829 --> 00:20:01,298
See, they put
a kissing clause in my contract.
348
00:20:01,365 --> 00:20:04,902
Huh?
Well, you see, it's those white celebrities.
349
00:20:04,969 --> 00:20:07,404
Well, this year
we're in,
350
00:20:07,471 --> 00:20:09,840
so they all want to
jump on the bandwagon.
351
00:20:16,380 --> 00:20:18,916
You mean to tell me
the networks force you...
352
00:20:18,983 --> 00:20:21,084
To kiss against your will?
353
00:20:21,152 --> 00:20:24,521
Well, what are
you gonna do?
354
00:20:24,588 --> 00:20:27,991
Well, that ain't right, Sam.
I mean, you know--
355
00:20:28,059 --> 00:20:32,863
I mean, gee,
to force the races to intersex that way on the air?
356
00:20:36,134 --> 00:20:40,437
No prejudice intended,
but I always check with the Bible on these here things.
357
00:20:40,504 --> 00:20:43,340
Oh.Yeah. I think that if Godhad meant us...
358
00:20:43,407 --> 00:20:45,508
To be together,
he'd have put us together.
359
00:20:45,576 --> 00:20:48,145
But look what he done.
He put you over in Africa,
360
00:20:48,213 --> 00:20:51,181
he put the rest of us
in all the white countries.
361
00:20:57,055 --> 00:20:59,056
Well, you must have told him
where we were,
362
00:20:59,123 --> 00:21:01,691
'cause somebody
came and got us.
363
00:21:08,666 --> 00:21:11,869
I mean, uh,
there was work for us.
364
00:21:13,137 --> 00:21:15,239
I mean, and, uh,
how could you resist?
365
00:21:15,306 --> 00:21:19,009
Free transportation,
room, board, chains.
366
00:21:21,346 --> 00:21:24,248
I think you're talking
about slavery there, Sammy.
367
00:21:24,315 --> 00:21:28,785
I want to tell you that
I was always dead set against slavery.
368
00:21:28,853 --> 00:21:34,391
♪ Glory, glory, hallelujah ♪
369
00:21:34,458 --> 00:21:36,659
♪ glory, glory hallelujah ♪what are you doing?
370
00:21:36,727 --> 00:21:41,064
We're having a conversation
over-- pull the plug on that!
371
00:21:41,132 --> 00:21:43,200
You see what goes on
around here, Sammy?
372
00:21:43,268 --> 00:21:48,005
Every time I start to have
a serious conversation, these kids go crazy.
373
00:21:48,072 --> 00:21:51,608
Another thing they're always
doing to me, they're always telling me I'm prejudiced.
374
00:21:51,675 --> 00:21:54,477
Now, listen.
You're a guy that's been around a lot.
375
00:21:54,545 --> 00:21:56,846
You've seen a lot of people
and you know a lot, see? Yeah?
376
00:21:56,915 --> 00:21:59,216
Now, you look at me.
You figure me for a prejudiced guy?
377
00:21:59,284 --> 00:22:01,251
Oh, Archie,
you don't tell me...
378
00:22:01,319 --> 00:22:03,486
You're really paying
attention to those young kids.
379
00:22:03,554 --> 00:22:07,157
What do they know.
I mean, you, prejudiced?
380
00:22:07,225 --> 00:22:10,327
Look, if you
were prejudiced, Archie, when I came into your house,
381
00:22:10,395 --> 00:22:12,896
you would have called me
a coon or a nigger.
382
00:22:12,964 --> 00:22:15,698
But you didn't say that.
I heard you clear as a bell.
383
00:22:15,766 --> 00:22:18,168
Right straight out,
you said, "colored."
384
00:22:21,339 --> 00:22:23,907
Yeah, that's what
I done, all right.
385
00:22:23,975 --> 00:22:26,977
And if you were prejudiced,
you would, like some people, close their eyes...
386
00:22:27,045 --> 00:22:29,712
To what's going on
in this great country that we live in.
387
00:22:29,780 --> 00:22:32,115
But not you, Archie.
Your eyes are wide open.
388
00:22:32,183 --> 00:22:35,685
You can tell the difference
between black and white.
389
00:22:35,753 --> 00:22:38,989
And I have
a deep-rooted feeling that you'll always be able...
390
00:22:39,057 --> 00:22:41,724
To tell the difference
between black and white.
391
00:22:43,261 --> 00:22:45,295
And if you were prejudiced,
you'd walk around thinking...
392
00:22:45,363 --> 00:22:47,797
That you're better than
anybody else in the world.
393
00:22:47,865 --> 00:22:51,368
But I can honestly say,
having spent these marvelous moments with you,
394
00:22:51,436 --> 00:22:53,736
you ain't better
than anybody.
395
00:23:01,879 --> 00:23:05,882
Can I have your hand
on that, Sam? Yes, sir.
396
00:23:05,950 --> 00:23:08,452
And I hope youse all
heard that over there.
397
00:23:08,519 --> 00:23:12,322
That comes straight
from Sammy Davis Jr., "Mr. wonderful" himself.
398
00:23:12,390 --> 00:23:15,658
And that should prove
to you once and for all that I ain't prejudiced.
399
00:23:15,726 --> 00:23:20,630
♪ His truth goes marching on ♪
400
00:23:20,698 --> 00:23:23,900
you see that?
You can't learn 'em nothing. [ Doorbell rings ]
401
00:23:23,968 --> 00:23:26,069
There's munson
with the briefcase now, there, Sammy.
402
00:23:26,137 --> 00:23:28,438
I'll let him right in.
403
00:23:28,506 --> 00:23:30,874
Hi, arch.
Munson, we were waiting for you. Where were you?
404
00:23:30,941 --> 00:23:33,543
I'm sorry I took so long,
arch, but I bumped into Barney Hefner with his camera,
405
00:23:33,611 --> 00:23:36,046
so naturally, I had to
go back and get mine. Oh, geez.
406
00:23:36,114 --> 00:23:38,248
Mr. Davis, this is
an unexpected pleasure.
407
00:23:38,316 --> 00:23:40,717
My pleasure.
Thank you very much. Can I get a picture?
408
00:23:40,784 --> 00:23:43,353
Come on, munson.
No pictures. Oh, no.
409
00:23:43,421 --> 00:23:45,688
Mr. munson,
would you stand over there? I want one picture taken....
410
00:23:45,756 --> 00:23:47,891
With Archie bunker,
my friend, and me. You and me?
411
00:23:47,958 --> 00:23:51,495
Yes.
Now, on three, okay? One, two, three.
412
00:23:58,302 --> 00:24:00,904
Good-bye, Mrs. bunker.
Peace and love. Bye, now.
413
00:24:17,755 --> 00:24:19,689
Well--
414
00:24:19,757 --> 00:24:22,559
what the hell.
He said it was in his contract.
415
00:24:30,068 --> 00:24:32,835
Archie, here's
an envelope for you...
416
00:24:32,903 --> 00:24:35,505
From Hollywood
from Sammy Davis Jr.
417
00:24:35,573 --> 00:24:38,641
Oh, hey, great!
Come on, arch! Open it up!
418
00:24:38,709 --> 00:24:41,378
All right. All right.
I'm opening it.
419
00:24:41,446 --> 00:24:44,481
Can't youse curdle down
your excitement a little bit here?
420
00:24:44,549 --> 00:24:47,617
Let's see what
we got here. Oh! Oh!
421
00:24:47,685 --> 00:24:51,621
Hey. That's the picture
of Sammy Davis you're looking at.
422
00:24:51,689 --> 00:24:56,359
And look what he writes here.
No, meathead, you read it!
423
00:24:56,427 --> 00:25:00,029
"To Archie bunker,
the whitest guy I know."
424
00:25:19,683 --> 00:25:23,786
[ Announcer ] All in the family
was recorded on tape before a live audience.
425
00:25:23,836 --> 00:25:28,386
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