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1
00:00:12,077 --> 00:00:13,911
(Arthur)
I'm in here.
2
00:00:13,979 --> 00:00:15,980
Dad, it's the middle
of the night.
3
00:00:16,048 --> 00:00:17,548
What are you doin' up?
4
00:00:17,616 --> 00:00:19,950
I didn't realize
I had a curfew.
5
00:00:20,019 --> 00:00:21,585
I-I'm sorry.
I just, uh,
6
00:00:21,653 --> 00:00:22,953
I need to get something.
7
00:00:23,022 --> 00:00:24,222
Tell me
what it is,
8
00:00:24,289 --> 00:00:26,657
and I'll slide it
under the door.
9
00:00:26,725 --> 00:00:28,459
Yeah. Won't work.
10
00:00:28,527 --> 00:00:30,928
Um, are you gonna be long?
11
00:00:30,996 --> 00:00:33,131
♪[New age music playing]
12
00:00:33,198 --> 00:00:35,033
Could be a few minutes!
13
00:00:40,205 --> 00:00:42,940
♪ My eyesare gettin' weary ♪
14
00:00:43,008 --> 00:00:45,576
♪ my back is gettin' tight
15
00:00:45,644 --> 00:00:47,745
♪ I'm sittin' herein traffic ♪
16
00:00:47,812 --> 00:00:50,748
♪ on the queensboro bridgetonight ♪
17
00:00:50,815 --> 00:00:54,352
♪ but I don't care,'cause all I want to do ♪
18
00:00:56,255 --> 00:00:59,790
♪ is cash my checkand drive right home to you ♪
19
00:01:01,660 --> 00:01:03,494
♪ 'cause, baby, all my life
20
00:01:03,562 --> 00:01:06,931
♪ I will be drivin'home to you ♪
21
00:01:17,007 --> 00:01:18,440
Gimme somethin' to punch.
22
00:01:18,508 --> 00:01:22,044
What? What's wrong?
Gimme somethin' to punch now!
23
00:01:22,112 --> 00:01:23,980
Not a friend.
24
00:01:24,047 --> 00:01:26,148
All right,
don't beat up our groceries.
25
00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:27,583
Just tell me what's wrong.
26
00:01:27,650 --> 00:01:29,986
Your father's what's wrong.
I'm tryin' to
get ready for work,
27
00:01:30,053 --> 00:01:31,420
I can't even get
in the bathroom.
28
00:01:31,488 --> 00:01:32,922
He spends
the whole day in there,
29
00:01:32,990 --> 00:01:34,957
like he's at six flags.
30
00:01:35,025 --> 00:01:36,425
Doug, he's old.
31
00:01:36,493 --> 00:01:37,894
His machinery just takes
32
00:01:37,961 --> 00:01:39,561
a little longer to rev up,
that's all.
33
00:01:39,629 --> 00:01:41,530
That's not all.
He's in there messin' around
34
00:01:41,598 --> 00:01:43,532
with a stupid foot massager
for half an hour.
35
00:01:43,600 --> 00:01:45,368
For your information,
it was a waterpik.
36
00:01:45,435 --> 00:01:48,604
Forgive me for not being
a bigger fan of gum disease.
37
00:01:48,671 --> 00:01:50,339
Fine, it was a waterpik.
My mistake.
38
00:01:50,407 --> 00:01:53,075
Oh, and by the way,
one time, try not aiming it
at the mirror.
39
00:01:53,143 --> 00:01:54,977
It might work out for you.
Give her a shot.
40
00:01:55,045 --> 00:01:56,212
Well, I'd probably do better
41
00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:57,914
if someone wasn't
banging on the door,
42
00:01:57,981 --> 00:02:00,082
spewing hateful invectives
at me.
43
00:02:00,150 --> 00:02:01,250
(Carrie)
All right, dad.
44
00:02:01,318 --> 00:02:03,585
Stop taunting Doug
with words he doesn't know.
45
00:02:03,653 --> 00:02:05,754
Now, both of you count to 10,
let me get out the door,
46
00:02:05,822 --> 00:02:07,256
and you can
start your slap fight.
47
00:02:07,324 --> 00:02:08,524
Sure, you can
run out the door,
48
00:02:08,591 --> 00:02:09,658
but you can't run away
49
00:02:09,726 --> 00:02:11,460
from your responsibility
in this matter.
50
00:02:11,528 --> 00:02:12,661
Me? What did I do?
51
00:02:12,729 --> 00:02:14,830
When you insisted
I come live here with you,
52
00:02:14,898 --> 00:02:16,432
you specifically promised me
53
00:02:16,499 --> 00:02:18,935
a furnished room
with private bath.
54
00:02:19,002 --> 00:02:20,669
I never said that.
55
00:02:20,737 --> 00:02:22,771
You said it with your eyes.
56
00:02:24,474 --> 00:02:27,776
Doug, can we just build
a bathroom downstairs for him?
57
00:02:27,844 --> 00:02:29,011
What? No!
58
00:02:29,079 --> 00:02:30,947
Why not? It's not like
he doesn't need it.
59
00:02:31,014 --> 00:02:33,149
He doesn't need it.
One bathroom is fine
for this house
60
00:02:33,216 --> 00:02:34,483
if he didn't nap in there.
61
00:02:34,551 --> 00:02:36,118
I don't plan them.
62
00:02:38,221 --> 00:02:39,855
So who's gonna
pay for this, Carrie?
63
00:02:39,923 --> 00:02:41,357
Well, we can dip
into our savings.
64
00:02:41,425 --> 00:02:43,859
I betcha we do the whole thing
for less than $1,000.
65
00:02:43,927 --> 00:02:45,127
Oh, just a thou?
66
00:02:45,195 --> 00:02:47,263
Oh, well, in that case--
no.
67
00:02:48,031 --> 00:02:49,265
Oh, I'm sorry, Douglas.
68
00:02:49,333 --> 00:02:50,466
Were you saving that money
69
00:02:50,533 --> 00:02:52,835
for yet another
50-foot television set?
70
00:02:52,902 --> 00:02:56,272
What I save my money for,
is none of your business.
71
00:02:56,340 --> 00:02:57,573
Fine, but bear in mind,
72
00:02:57,640 --> 00:02:59,741
my bladder has me up
7 or 8 times a night,
73
00:02:59,809 --> 00:03:01,510
and that laundry sink
down there
74
00:03:01,578 --> 00:03:04,146
is starting to look
awfully good to me.
75
00:03:05,182 --> 00:03:07,183
And checkmate! Dad wins!
76
00:03:07,250 --> 00:03:08,985
Goodbye and goodbye.
77
00:03:20,030 --> 00:03:21,030
[Knocking on door]
78
00:03:21,098 --> 00:03:22,465
(Deacon)
Yeah, come on in.
79
00:03:22,532 --> 00:03:24,566
Hey, come on, man.
Let's get goin', huh?
80
00:03:24,634 --> 00:03:25,801
What's up with you?
81
00:03:25,869 --> 00:03:27,669
I had a crappy morning.
82
00:03:27,737 --> 00:03:29,271
I gotta shell out
$1,000
83
00:03:29,339 --> 00:03:31,407
to build a bathroom
for Arthur. You believe that?
84
00:03:31,475 --> 00:03:32,774
You never built him
a bathroom?
85
00:03:32,842 --> 00:03:34,576
That's cold.
86
00:03:34,644 --> 00:03:37,813
Anyway, it kills me
the way he manipulates Carrie.
87
00:03:37,881 --> 00:03:39,215
He knows what he's doin'.
88
00:03:39,282 --> 00:03:41,083
"Oh, I'm old.
89
00:03:42,119 --> 00:03:44,253
I have different smells."
90
00:03:47,491 --> 00:03:49,691
Well, he is pretty old.
91
00:03:49,759 --> 00:03:51,593
I'm so not into you today.
92
00:03:51,661 --> 00:03:53,362
Listen, don't take it
out on me, man.
93
00:03:53,430 --> 00:03:55,231
I'm not havin'
such a great day myself.
94
00:03:55,298 --> 00:03:56,765
Yeah? What's up?
95
00:03:56,833 --> 00:03:59,135
I went out to
marriage counseling
with Kelly last night,
96
00:03:59,202 --> 00:04:00,536
and--and it went
pretty well.
97
00:04:00,603 --> 00:04:02,271
So we decided to
go out to dinner after,
98
00:04:02,339 --> 00:04:03,672
you know,
to keep talking, right?
99
00:04:03,740 --> 00:04:04,806
So?
100
00:04:04,874 --> 00:04:06,075
So,
101
00:04:06,143 --> 00:04:08,344
so he gets all bent
out of shape just because--
102
00:04:08,412 --> 00:04:10,579
he has a name,
thank you.
103
00:04:10,647 --> 00:04:12,181
And perhaps
Doug would like
104
00:04:12,249 --> 00:04:14,116
to hear both sides
of the story, hmm?
105
00:04:14,184 --> 00:04:16,085
Not that much, no.
106
00:04:16,153 --> 00:04:17,520
Just let it go,
all right?
107
00:04:17,587 --> 00:04:19,422
Oh, me?
I should let it go?
108
00:04:19,489 --> 00:04:21,023
Um, was I the one that said,
109
00:04:21,091 --> 00:04:23,559
"I'll be home at 8:00.
Order a pizza." Was that me?
110
00:04:23,626 --> 00:04:26,362
I'm tryin' to reconcile
with my wife, man.
111
00:04:26,430 --> 00:04:29,765
Fine. This is a telephone,
112
00:04:29,832 --> 00:04:32,868
and it was invented
so that people
could call other people,
113
00:04:32,936 --> 00:04:34,370
and tell them
not to order a pizza
114
00:04:34,438 --> 00:04:35,904
they have no intention
of eating.
115
00:04:35,972 --> 00:04:37,406
It's a pizza.
116
00:04:37,474 --> 00:04:39,141
Just get my half
out of the fridge,
I'll pay you for it.
117
00:04:39,209 --> 00:04:40,209
Forget it.
118
00:04:40,277 --> 00:04:41,777
No, come on, here.
I wanna end this.
119
00:04:41,844 --> 00:04:43,979
Take this, and give me
the rest of the pizza.
Come on.
120
00:04:44,047 --> 00:04:45,448
Come on. Come on. Come on.
121
00:04:45,515 --> 00:04:47,749
I ate it, all right?
122
00:04:47,817 --> 00:04:49,585
In a fit of self-loathing,
123
00:04:49,652 --> 00:04:53,255
I wolfed down an entire large
pizza by myself,
124
00:04:53,323 --> 00:04:55,757
and you just made me admit it
in front of Doug!
125
00:04:55,825 --> 00:04:57,093
Thank you!
126
00:04:59,196 --> 00:05:00,229
[Door slamming]
127
00:05:00,297 --> 00:05:01,863
You all set?
Yeah.
128
00:05:05,802 --> 00:05:07,803
And after I finish
with the framing,
129
00:05:07,870 --> 00:05:10,038
I put up half-inch greenboard.
That's very good.
130
00:05:10,107 --> 00:05:12,741
Half-inch greenboard, huh?
Is that the cheapest you have?
131
00:05:12,809 --> 00:05:15,177
Well, no. There is
quarter-inch. You want that?
132
00:05:15,245 --> 00:05:16,579
You know what?
That'll be fine.
133
00:05:16,646 --> 00:05:18,380
Quarter-inch?
That's not very thick.
134
00:05:18,448 --> 00:05:19,381
So?
135
00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:20,983
What if you
get mad at me,
136
00:05:21,050 --> 00:05:23,652
and try to punch your way in?
I wanna feel secure in there.
137
00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:24,786
Quarter-inch.
138
00:05:24,854 --> 00:05:25,887
I want half-inch.
139
00:05:25,955 --> 00:05:27,022
You don't need
half-inch.
140
00:05:27,090 --> 00:05:28,524
I do need half-inch.
141
00:05:28,592 --> 00:05:30,926
H-h-how about three-eights?
142
00:05:30,994 --> 00:05:32,628
Can I have four-eights?
143
00:05:33,963 --> 00:05:35,297
Three-eights will be fine.
144
00:05:35,365 --> 00:05:37,766
If you're looking to
save some money elsewhere,
145
00:05:37,834 --> 00:05:39,468
I can get for you a deal
on the toilet.
146
00:05:39,536 --> 00:05:41,737
Whoa! Whoa, there, trotsky.
I already picked out
147
00:05:41,804 --> 00:05:43,972
what I want
in that department.
148
00:05:45,242 --> 00:05:46,575
King of prussia
149
00:05:46,643 --> 00:05:49,311
in pacific blue
or sandstone.
150
00:05:49,379 --> 00:05:51,747
Arthur, this toilet
is $600!
151
00:05:51,814 --> 00:05:53,849
It's ergonomically correct.
152
00:05:56,052 --> 00:05:58,654
I'm not paying $600
for a toilet!
153
00:05:58,721 --> 00:05:59,855
Fine!
154
00:05:59,922 --> 00:06:01,624
Why don't we just
dig a hole in the ground,
155
00:06:01,691 --> 00:06:03,992
line it with newspapers?
156
00:06:04,060 --> 00:06:06,262
Or is a nickel
still too much?
157
00:06:07,264 --> 00:06:08,531
Carrie!
158
00:06:11,201 --> 00:06:13,435
You got to go down and talk
to your father right now.
159
00:06:13,503 --> 00:06:14,736
I'll talk to him later.
160
00:06:14,804 --> 00:06:16,338
No, later's too late.
I gotta get to work,
161
00:06:16,406 --> 00:06:18,407
and he's outta control
on this bathroom thing.
162
00:06:18,475 --> 00:06:22,378
It took me 20 minutes
to explain to him
why he can't have a view.
163
00:06:24,047 --> 00:06:27,550
I'll deal with it later.
I don't feel well.
164
00:06:27,617 --> 00:06:28,884
What's the matter?
165
00:06:28,951 --> 00:06:31,220
I don't know.
My--my stomach's weird.
166
00:06:31,288 --> 00:06:34,890
You think it's that crab taco
you had at the drive-thru?
167
00:06:34,957 --> 00:06:36,358
You had that.
168
00:06:37,827 --> 00:06:39,094
You had a bite.
169
00:06:39,162 --> 00:06:41,297
No. You wouldn't
give me one.
170
00:06:43,233 --> 00:06:44,633
They're not that big.
171
00:06:44,701 --> 00:06:46,835
Whatever!
It's not from that!
172
00:06:46,903 --> 00:06:48,270
I gotta go.
I am so late.
173
00:06:48,338 --> 00:06:50,038
Just talk to your dad
when you can, ok?
174
00:06:50,106 --> 00:06:51,139
And take
some pepto-bismol.
175
00:06:51,208 --> 00:06:52,341
It's not
that kind of thing.
176
00:06:52,409 --> 00:06:53,442
Then what is it?
177
00:06:53,510 --> 00:06:54,510
I don't know!
178
00:06:54,578 --> 00:06:56,011
Ok! Goodbye!
179
00:06:59,583 --> 00:07:00,749
[Sighing]
180
00:07:00,817 --> 00:07:02,518
What the hell is it?
181
00:07:07,023 --> 00:07:08,957
Oh, wait a minute.
Wait, wait, wait.
182
00:07:09,025 --> 00:07:12,027
I forgot to put my thingy in.
I'll be right back, ok?
183
00:07:12,095 --> 00:07:13,429
All right.
I'll get started.
184
00:07:13,496 --> 00:07:16,131
You work your way in,
like double-Dutch.
185
00:07:23,273 --> 00:07:24,873
(Arthur)
I'm in here!
186
00:07:34,317 --> 00:07:35,417
[Knocking on door]
187
00:07:35,485 --> 00:07:36,552
(Arthur)
Carrie!
188
00:07:36,620 --> 00:07:37,819
Uh, yeah, dad?
189
00:07:37,887 --> 00:07:39,421
If you've got a moment,
190
00:07:39,489 --> 00:07:42,691
I'd like your thoughts
on some wallpaper samples.
191
00:07:42,759 --> 00:07:44,460
Uh, I'll be out
in a minute.
192
00:07:44,527 --> 00:07:46,262
The contractor likes
the striped pattern,
193
00:07:46,329 --> 00:07:48,664
but I'm leaning toward
the seagulls.
194
00:07:48,732 --> 00:07:50,866
They're a marvelous bird,
don't you think?
195
00:07:50,933 --> 00:07:52,934
Uh, dad, I just--
I just need a minute.
196
00:07:53,002 --> 00:07:54,336
Righto.
197
00:07:54,404 --> 00:07:56,272
I'll wait downstairs
with the contractor.
198
00:08:09,653 --> 00:08:10,819
Oh, boy.
199
00:08:12,789 --> 00:08:14,089
[Whistling]
200
00:08:19,195 --> 00:08:21,363
So, where are you from
exactly?
201
00:08:21,431 --> 00:08:22,864
I was born in Kiev.
202
00:08:22,932 --> 00:08:26,335
Ah, yes! Kiev.
Jewel of the Ukraine.
203
00:08:26,403 --> 00:08:27,869
You have been there?
204
00:08:27,937 --> 00:08:30,071
No. But I hear good things.
205
00:08:34,411 --> 00:08:36,812
Oh, darling, good.
Here's a 3rd
wallpaper choice
206
00:08:36,879 --> 00:08:38,714
I'm also considering.
207
00:08:38,782 --> 00:08:41,650
Lively cartoons
of various people
in the John.
208
00:08:43,386 --> 00:08:44,753
What do you think?
209
00:08:44,821 --> 00:08:47,055
Uh, it's--it's fine.
210
00:08:47,123 --> 00:08:49,257
I'm sensing
some hesitation.
211
00:08:49,326 --> 00:08:51,092
Too Randy?
212
00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:52,928
Think it might
cause a stir?
213
00:08:53,896 --> 00:08:55,263
I-I'm sorry, dad,
214
00:08:55,332 --> 00:08:57,333
I really can't focus
on that right now.
215
00:08:57,400 --> 00:09:00,536
Alex, I think we might have
to put a pin in this
till next time.
216
00:09:00,603 --> 00:09:02,270
Ok. I'll see you tomorrow.
217
00:09:03,707 --> 00:09:04,940
Hmm!
218
00:09:05,007 --> 00:09:06,642
Look at this drunken fella.
219
00:09:06,710 --> 00:09:07,843
[Door closing]
220
00:09:07,910 --> 00:09:10,679
Doesn't even realize
the lid's down.
221
00:09:10,747 --> 00:09:11,980
Marvelous!
222
00:09:13,750 --> 00:09:15,684
I'm--I'm pregnant.
223
00:09:15,752 --> 00:09:16,952
Hmm?
224
00:09:17,019 --> 00:09:18,420
I'm sorry, dear.
What?
225
00:09:18,488 --> 00:09:19,588
I'm...
226
00:09:20,256 --> 00:09:21,423
I'm,
227
00:09:21,491 --> 00:09:22,991
I'm pregnant, dad.
228
00:09:23,059 --> 00:09:24,259
Well, that's terrific!
229
00:09:24,327 --> 00:09:26,895
No. No, it's not terrific.
230
00:09:26,963 --> 00:09:29,331
We weren't-- we weren't
trying for this now, dad.
231
00:09:29,399 --> 00:09:32,000
We just--
we just got careless.
232
00:09:32,068 --> 00:09:33,369
So what, darling?
233
00:09:33,436 --> 00:09:35,771
Nature works
in its own wonderful way.
234
00:09:35,839 --> 00:09:37,740
This has nothing to do
with nature.
235
00:09:37,807 --> 00:09:40,208
I couldn't get in the bathroom
and get what I needed,
236
00:09:40,276 --> 00:09:43,412
because you were locked in
there listening to enya!
237
00:09:46,249 --> 00:09:51,219
Well, I offered to
slip your doohickey
under the door.
238
00:09:51,287 --> 00:09:53,889
Yeah, well,
I didn't want you to
touch my doohickey.
239
00:09:53,956 --> 00:09:55,424
Ok?
240
00:09:55,492 --> 00:09:57,058
But that's not the point.
241
00:09:57,126 --> 00:09:59,194
The point is we're not
prepared for this, dad.
242
00:09:59,262 --> 00:10:00,929
We barely have
enough money in the bank
243
00:10:00,997 --> 00:10:03,231
to--to build you
your bathroom.
244
00:10:03,299 --> 00:10:05,066
A kid is like 10 bathrooms!
245
00:10:05,134 --> 00:10:07,302
And that's if we don't
let it go to college!
246
00:10:07,370 --> 00:10:08,504
[Exclaims]
247
00:10:08,571 --> 00:10:10,105
Darling, many years ago,
248
00:10:10,172 --> 00:10:12,107
I anticipated
that this day would come,
249
00:10:12,174 --> 00:10:15,644
so I put together a plan
that would help you kids out
250
00:10:15,712 --> 00:10:17,713
with your financial needs.
251
00:10:17,781 --> 00:10:18,980
You did?
Yes.
252
00:10:19,048 --> 00:10:20,181
Looking back,
253
00:10:20,249 --> 00:10:22,984
I wish I had followed through
on that plan.
254
00:10:25,955 --> 00:10:28,390
But in my defense,
255
00:10:29,526 --> 00:10:31,860
the dog races
are terribly fixed.
256
00:10:34,163 --> 00:10:35,397
Dad, you know what?
257
00:10:35,465 --> 00:10:37,132
It's not your responsibility.
258
00:10:37,199 --> 00:10:39,902
Doug and I
made a dumb mistake,
and now...
259
00:10:39,969 --> 00:10:41,603
Well, I don't even know
what now.
260
00:10:41,671 --> 00:10:42,771
I'll tell you one thing.
261
00:10:42,839 --> 00:10:44,473
You got to talk to Douglas
right away.
262
00:10:44,541 --> 00:10:45,774
I can't. I have to go to work.
263
00:10:45,842 --> 00:10:48,109
Work, schmerk!
This is your life!
264
00:10:48,177 --> 00:10:49,845
You need to
hold each other.
265
00:10:49,913 --> 00:10:52,881
Dad, my boss has
a huge deposition today
which starts in
266
00:10:52,949 --> 00:10:54,616
less than an hour.
I got to go.
267
00:10:54,684 --> 00:10:56,985
I will tell him
when I get home
from work tonight,
268
00:10:57,053 --> 00:10:59,988
and don't you tell him
if he gets home first, ok?
269
00:11:00,056 --> 00:11:01,256
Fine, whatever.
270
00:11:01,324 --> 00:11:03,692
Dad, this is
a personal matter, ok?
271
00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:05,126
I need you to
look me in the eye
272
00:11:05,194 --> 00:11:07,596
and swear on mom's grave,
that you won't tell him.
273
00:11:07,664 --> 00:11:10,632
Pick a different grave.
How about aunt lottie?
274
00:11:10,700 --> 00:11:12,100
Dad!
275
00:11:12,168 --> 00:11:13,702
Fine. I won't tell him.
276
00:11:13,770 --> 00:11:15,971
Thank you.
I love you.
277
00:11:16,038 --> 00:11:18,006
Love you, too, sweetheart.
278
00:11:27,047 --> 00:11:28,782
Ok, kids,
last time I checked,
279
00:11:28,849 --> 00:11:30,584
packages don't
deliver themselves.
280
00:11:30,652 --> 00:11:31,851
Chop, chop.
281
00:11:31,919 --> 00:11:33,019
All right,
I'm outta here.
282
00:11:33,087 --> 00:11:34,554
Where do you want
to meet for lunch?
283
00:11:34,622 --> 00:11:37,357
Anywhere as long as
it's a castle
and it's white.
284
00:11:37,425 --> 00:11:38,525
1:00?
285
00:11:38,593 --> 00:11:39,993
See you then.
286
00:11:40,961 --> 00:11:41,995
[Door closes]
287
00:11:42,062 --> 00:11:43,430
Hello, Douglas!
288
00:11:43,498 --> 00:11:44,864
Arthur,
what are you doing here?
289
00:11:44,932 --> 00:11:46,132
Ah, nothing special.
290
00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:47,768
I may be sending
a package soon,
291
00:11:47,835 --> 00:11:50,404
and I wanted your outfit
to get first crack
at the business.
292
00:11:50,471 --> 00:11:53,540
So far, I like what I see.
293
00:11:53,608 --> 00:11:55,842
Ok, once again,
what are you doin' here?
294
00:11:55,910 --> 00:11:57,411
Is this about
your stupid bathroom?
295
00:11:57,478 --> 00:11:58,612
Not at all.
296
00:11:58,680 --> 00:12:00,414
But, hey, since fate
has thrown us together,
297
00:12:00,481 --> 00:12:02,549
what say we pop into the city
and see Carrie?
298
00:12:02,617 --> 00:12:03,717
Come on. Road trip!
299
00:12:03,785 --> 00:12:05,919
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Is Carrie ok?
300
00:12:05,986 --> 00:12:07,487
She's fine, she's fine.
301
00:12:07,555 --> 00:12:10,824
But I do think you should
speak to her immediately.
302
00:12:10,891 --> 00:12:12,959
There's a bit of
a situation.
303
00:12:14,028 --> 00:12:15,161
Well, what is it?
304
00:12:15,229 --> 00:12:16,430
I am forbidden to tell.
305
00:12:16,497 --> 00:12:17,764
Would you
just tell me?
306
00:12:17,832 --> 00:12:19,299
I'm forbidden!
307
00:12:19,367 --> 00:12:20,467
Heffernan.
308
00:12:20,535 --> 00:12:21,702
That thing I said before,
309
00:12:21,769 --> 00:12:23,670
that was just
chummy boss talk,
310
00:12:23,738 --> 00:12:26,239
but the fact is
packages really don't
deliver themselves.
311
00:12:26,307 --> 00:12:29,209
I'm sorry, Mr. O'Boyle.
It's just that I have
a little family crisis.
312
00:12:29,276 --> 00:12:30,510
More of a situation
actually.
313
00:12:30,578 --> 00:12:32,312
A situation, right.
What is it?
314
00:12:32,380 --> 00:12:33,647
I don't know.
He won't tell me.
315
00:12:33,715 --> 00:12:35,482
I've been forbidden.
316
00:12:35,550 --> 00:12:36,516
Who are you?
317
00:12:36,584 --> 00:12:37,851
A concerned citizen.
318
00:12:37,918 --> 00:12:39,886
He's my father-in-law.
Is it ok if I go into the city
319
00:12:39,954 --> 00:12:40,987
and talk to my wife?
320
00:12:41,055 --> 00:12:43,423
What? Oh, come on, heffernan.
321
00:12:43,491 --> 00:12:45,359
I mean, I got wife problems
as well.
322
00:12:45,426 --> 00:12:47,193
You don't see me
runnin' outta here
323
00:12:47,261 --> 00:12:50,797
just 'cause she took the kids
back to India.
324
00:12:50,865 --> 00:12:53,867
Sir, the man has
a legitimate situation
to deal with at once.
325
00:12:53,934 --> 00:12:55,902
Well, what the hell is it?
326
00:12:57,672 --> 00:12:58,938
Come here.
327
00:13:02,677 --> 00:13:03,744
[Whispering]
328
00:13:03,811 --> 00:13:05,612
Really?
Well, that's terrific.
329
00:13:05,680 --> 00:13:07,714
(Arthur)
Wait. There's more.
330
00:13:08,983 --> 00:13:10,350
Ohh!
331
00:13:12,152 --> 00:13:13,387
That's a shame.
332
00:13:14,689 --> 00:13:16,122
All right, heffernan,
you can go.
333
00:13:16,190 --> 00:13:17,323
Come on!
334
00:13:18,993 --> 00:13:19,993
What is it?
335
00:13:20,060 --> 00:13:21,261
I'm forbidden!
336
00:13:23,964 --> 00:13:25,866
(Berenson)
Now, Mr. mazzeo,
in your testimony
337
00:13:25,933 --> 00:13:27,934
before the securities
and exchange commission,
338
00:13:28,002 --> 00:13:30,303
you specifically mentioned
that you had no knowledge
339
00:13:30,371 --> 00:13:31,772
of the pending merger.
340
00:13:31,839 --> 00:13:34,340
And you signed an affidavit
to that effect as well.
341
00:13:34,409 --> 00:13:36,676
Could I see that, please,
Carrie?
342
00:13:37,945 --> 00:13:39,012
Carrie?
343
00:13:39,079 --> 00:13:40,447
Hmm? I'm sorry.
What?
344
00:13:40,515 --> 00:13:42,348
Could I please see
Mr. mazzeo's affidavit,
please?
345
00:13:42,417 --> 00:13:44,618
Oh. Sure, you can. Ok.
346
00:13:44,685 --> 00:13:46,420
[Muttering]
347
00:13:48,088 --> 00:13:49,122
There you go.
348
00:13:49,189 --> 00:13:50,490
Thank you.
You're welcome.
349
00:13:50,558 --> 00:13:54,428
Now, Mr. mazzeo,
if I can refer you
to page 51,
350
00:13:54,495 --> 00:13:56,329
specifically paragraph 5...
351
00:13:56,397 --> 00:13:58,164
Oh, God, would you look
at this gas bill?
352
00:13:58,232 --> 00:13:59,733
Can we put this
on a credit card?
353
00:13:59,801 --> 00:14:03,937
We could if it hadn't
been scissored in half
at McDonalds.
354
00:14:04,004 --> 00:14:05,839
What about all these
frequent flyer Miles?
355
00:14:05,907 --> 00:14:08,141
Can we use them
for anything?
356
00:14:08,208 --> 00:14:09,910
Yeah, that's
a minus sign.
357
00:14:09,977 --> 00:14:11,545
We owe them Miles.
358
00:14:11,612 --> 00:14:12,779
[Crashing]
359
00:14:12,847 --> 00:14:14,481
Could you deal with that,
please?
360
00:14:14,549 --> 00:14:15,816
Your turn!
361
00:14:20,588 --> 00:14:21,721
[Wailing]
362
00:14:21,789 --> 00:14:22,889
(Carrie)
Doug junior...
363
00:14:22,957 --> 00:14:23,924
Oh!
364
00:14:24,926 --> 00:14:26,059
Oh, ok...
365
00:14:26,126 --> 00:14:27,627
Oh, that's not good.
366
00:14:27,695 --> 00:14:29,395
Sweetie, no, no--
367
00:14:29,464 --> 00:14:31,030
[screaming]
368
00:14:31,098 --> 00:14:33,333
There we go.
There we go.
There we go.
369
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:35,301
Ooh! No, no,
that's mama's. Mama's.
370
00:14:35,369 --> 00:14:37,504
No, mama's sad,
mama's sad.
371
00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:40,006
[Babbling]
372
00:14:40,074 --> 00:14:41,608
No, no, no.
No, no, no.
373
00:14:41,676 --> 00:14:44,711
Dougie, sweetie,
sweetie, be careful--
you gotta be careful--
374
00:14:44,779 --> 00:14:46,012
play nice. No, no, no.
375
00:14:46,080 --> 00:14:49,282
Wait. No, no. I need that.
Neat, please.
Mama.
376
00:14:49,350 --> 00:14:51,250
Yeah, ok, baby.
377
00:14:51,318 --> 00:14:53,520
[Groaning]
Oh, ok. All right.
378
00:14:55,122 --> 00:14:56,723
It's ok, it's ok.
379
00:14:58,626 --> 00:14:59,993
[Continues groaning]
380
00:15:09,069 --> 00:15:11,905
Doug junior,
it's time to go home.
381
00:15:16,744 --> 00:15:19,913
Come on, sweetie.
We have to leave now.
382
00:15:19,981 --> 00:15:22,749
Hey, Dougie,
you want some ice cream?
383
00:15:22,817 --> 00:15:26,520
Yeah! Yes, come on.
Come on, baby.
384
00:15:26,587 --> 00:15:30,023
Come on.
Yes, yes, come on.
385
00:15:30,090 --> 00:15:32,458
Come on, baby. Yeah!
386
00:15:32,527 --> 00:15:34,561
(Carrie)
Yes-- oops!
387
00:15:34,629 --> 00:15:35,929
Honey, it's ok.
388
00:15:35,997 --> 00:15:38,865
Honey, it's ok.
Ice cream. Ice cream!
389
00:15:38,933 --> 00:15:40,166
Yeah! Yeah!
390
00:15:40,234 --> 00:15:42,702
Come get it, baby.
391
00:15:42,770 --> 00:15:45,038
Honey, slow--
you gotta slow down, baby.
392
00:15:45,105 --> 00:15:46,472
Baby, you gotta slow down.
Yeah.
393
00:15:46,541 --> 00:15:47,974
Slow, slow, slow.
394
00:15:48,609 --> 00:15:49,609
Ooh!
395
00:15:58,586 --> 00:16:00,219
(Berenson)
Carrie!
Hmm? Oh!
396
00:16:00,287 --> 00:16:02,088
Can I see the transcript,
please?
Oh, sure.
397
00:16:02,156 --> 00:16:03,356
I'm sorry.
398
00:16:04,559 --> 00:16:07,627
Yeah. Now, Mr. mazzeo,
399
00:16:07,695 --> 00:16:09,863
on the 14th of August, you...
400
00:16:12,667 --> 00:16:14,901
Uh, excuse me one moment,
please.
401
00:16:15,736 --> 00:16:16,803
What's going on?
402
00:16:16,871 --> 00:16:18,137
Hi, I'm, uh,
Carrie's husband.
403
00:16:18,205 --> 00:16:20,173
Any chance I could
speak to her for a moment?
404
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:22,408
We're in the middle
of a deposition.
Can it wait?
405
00:16:22,476 --> 00:16:24,210
I'm pretty sure
it can't,
406
00:16:24,278 --> 00:16:26,112
but I'm not positive.
407
00:16:26,180 --> 00:16:27,513
I don't understand.
408
00:16:27,582 --> 00:16:29,348
It's a very sensitive matter
409
00:16:29,416 --> 00:16:31,918
he's not privy to
at the moment.
410
00:16:31,986 --> 00:16:34,253
You see...
411
00:16:34,321 --> 00:16:37,256
Come here.
Will you stop
telling people!
412
00:16:37,324 --> 00:16:38,491
Look, tell me!
413
00:16:38,559 --> 00:16:39,993
I'm forbidden.
414
00:16:40,628 --> 00:16:42,261
Doug? Dad?
415
00:16:42,329 --> 00:16:44,397
Here's your husband.
Now talk to him.
416
00:16:44,465 --> 00:16:46,499
I'll be waiting in there.
417
00:16:46,567 --> 00:16:48,868
What the hell is going on?
He won't tell me anything.
418
00:16:48,936 --> 00:16:50,837
Dad, why did you bring him
down here?
419
00:16:50,905 --> 00:16:52,138
I am working.
420
00:16:52,206 --> 00:16:55,575
This is more important.
Now tell him!
421
00:16:55,643 --> 00:16:57,777
Doug, I--I--I really can't
talk right now.
422
00:16:57,845 --> 00:16:59,946
The thing is, um,
I'm pregnant.
423
00:17:00,014 --> 00:17:01,815
And I'm terrified
we're gonna be broke,
424
00:17:01,882 --> 00:17:03,783
and I love you,
and we'll talk at home.
425
00:17:07,555 --> 00:17:10,190
So, in the mood
for a knish?
426
00:17:15,697 --> 00:17:16,863
They asleep?
427
00:17:16,931 --> 00:17:19,533
Finally. Kirby put up
a helluva fight, though.
428
00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:22,336
Had to read him
everyone poops 4 times.
429
00:17:22,403 --> 00:17:23,870
God, he's obsessed
with that book.
430
00:17:23,938 --> 00:17:25,271
I think I know it
by heart now.
431
00:17:25,340 --> 00:17:26,540
It's a good book, though.
432
00:17:26,607 --> 00:17:30,043
I actually never realized
that everyone poops.
433
00:17:30,110 --> 00:17:32,746
Yeah, well, the title
does give it away.
434
00:17:35,383 --> 00:17:39,319
Uh, anyway, I guess
I should, uh, head on
back to Spence's.
435
00:17:39,387 --> 00:17:40,787
Sure. Ok.
436
00:17:40,855 --> 00:17:42,856
So, I'll, uh, I'll, uh,
437
00:17:42,923 --> 00:17:44,758
see you at counseling
on Thursday, right?
438
00:17:44,826 --> 00:17:45,792
Right.
439
00:17:45,860 --> 00:17:46,926
Right.
440
00:17:46,994 --> 00:17:48,261
All right.
441
00:17:50,164 --> 00:17:51,598
Deacon...
442
00:17:51,666 --> 00:17:52,932
Yeah?
443
00:17:53,000 --> 00:17:54,835
Look, I have half a lasagna
from yesterday.
444
00:17:54,902 --> 00:17:58,372
I could heat it up
if you haven't already eaten.
445
00:17:58,439 --> 00:17:59,539
[Ringing]
446
00:18:00,808 --> 00:18:01,742
Hello?
447
00:18:01,809 --> 00:18:02,843
Hey, man, it's me.
448
00:18:02,910 --> 00:18:04,310
Oh, hey. Where are you?
449
00:18:04,379 --> 00:18:07,247
I'm at home and I'm just gonna
hang out here for dinner, ok?
450
00:18:07,314 --> 00:18:08,382
No problemo.
451
00:18:08,449 --> 00:18:10,149
Probably be home about 10:00.
452
00:18:10,217 --> 00:18:11,551
I'll see you then.
453
00:18:11,619 --> 00:18:14,488
And, hey,
thanks for the phone call.
454
00:18:14,555 --> 00:18:15,922
Not so hard, was it?
455
00:18:15,990 --> 00:18:17,991
You're right, you're right.
My bad.
456
00:18:18,058 --> 00:18:19,659
Listen, have a good dinner.
457
00:18:19,727 --> 00:18:21,261
I'll catch you later,
buddy boy.
458
00:18:33,408 --> 00:18:34,741
I'm not ready.
I'm not ready.
459
00:18:34,809 --> 00:18:36,242
I am so not ready.
460
00:18:36,310 --> 00:18:38,244
All right, come on,
will you just calm down.
461
00:18:38,312 --> 00:18:40,881
Doug, this is not a situation
that calls for calming down,
ok?
462
00:18:40,948 --> 00:18:43,650
As a matter of fact,
why don't you calm up?
463
00:18:43,718 --> 00:18:44,851
Ok, there's no such thing.
464
00:18:44,919 --> 00:18:46,420
You can only calm
in one direction.
465
00:18:46,487 --> 00:18:48,655
Well, then maybe
they should change that.
466
00:18:48,723 --> 00:18:50,089
Why are you so upset?
467
00:18:50,157 --> 00:18:51,658
We wanted to have a baby
eventually, right?
468
00:18:51,726 --> 00:18:53,794
Yes, eventually, Doug.
Not today.
469
00:18:53,861 --> 00:18:55,595
It's like being offered
a job on Monday,
470
00:18:55,663 --> 00:18:57,564
but you have to start it
on Tuesday.
471
00:18:57,632 --> 00:19:00,033
"Congratulations,
you're our new
pregnant person!
472
00:19:00,100 --> 00:19:01,635
See you at 9 a.m.!"
473
00:19:01,702 --> 00:19:03,236
And I can't even tell them
that I don't want the job
474
00:19:03,304 --> 00:19:05,305
because I've already
been fired from my old job
475
00:19:05,372 --> 00:19:06,606
as a not-pregnant person.
476
00:19:06,674 --> 00:19:08,374
I'm not even allowed
near the building!
477
00:19:08,443 --> 00:19:10,444
Ok, will you stop
straightening up for a second?
478
00:19:10,511 --> 00:19:12,312
I can't!
We're having a baby!
479
00:19:12,379 --> 00:19:14,548
Yeah, well,
he's not dropping by tonight.
480
00:19:19,153 --> 00:19:21,287
[Sighing]
Now, listen to me.
481
00:19:21,355 --> 00:19:22,355
What?
482
00:19:22,423 --> 00:19:24,958
Everything is gonna be fine.
483
00:19:25,025 --> 00:19:27,494
But you have to stop worrying.
484
00:19:27,562 --> 00:19:29,863
How can I
stop worrying, Doug?
485
00:19:29,931 --> 00:19:31,665
We're--we're broke,
we're unprepared,
486
00:19:31,732 --> 00:19:33,733
and I drop things.
487
00:19:33,801 --> 00:19:36,202
You know your--
you know your jets mug?
488
00:19:36,270 --> 00:19:38,472
That wasn't my dad.
That was me.
489
00:19:38,539 --> 00:19:40,574
Will you just listen to me?
490
00:19:41,642 --> 00:19:43,276
From this moment
491
00:19:43,344 --> 00:19:45,144
until the moment
Bruce is born--
492
00:19:45,212 --> 00:19:46,346
Bruce?
493
00:19:50,685 --> 00:19:52,018
For Springsteen, you know?
494
00:19:52,086 --> 00:19:54,020
No. But go on.
495
00:19:54,088 --> 00:19:56,623
Until the moment he is born,
496
00:19:56,691 --> 00:19:59,659
all the burden is on me.
497
00:19:59,727 --> 00:20:02,529
Ok, I'm gonna work overtime,
I'll get a job at night,
498
00:20:02,597 --> 00:20:04,397
we'll sock away
a lot of money.
499
00:20:04,465 --> 00:20:06,600
And if anything comes up,
I'll take care of it.
500
00:20:06,667 --> 00:20:07,868
Anything.
501
00:20:09,169 --> 00:20:10,303
Well, what do I do?
502
00:20:10,371 --> 00:20:11,972
You just think happy thoughts
503
00:20:12,039 --> 00:20:14,841
and--and grow a baby.
That's your only job.
504
00:20:16,343 --> 00:20:19,112
Not counting your regular job.
We need that.
505
00:20:21,315 --> 00:20:22,916
I'll try.
506
00:20:22,984 --> 00:20:24,818
But I'm gonna freak out,
Doug, sometimes.
507
00:20:24,886 --> 00:20:26,085
I can't help that.
508
00:20:26,153 --> 00:20:28,354
So then you freak out.
But then you call me, ok?
509
00:20:28,422 --> 00:20:30,991
'Cause I'm always
wearing my phone, huh?
510
00:20:31,058 --> 00:20:32,893
Oh.
511
00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:34,427
Other side.
It's on the other side.
512
00:20:34,495 --> 00:20:35,595
[Sighing]
513
00:20:35,663 --> 00:20:38,765
Look, it'll ring.
I'll find it. Trust me.
514
00:20:38,833 --> 00:20:41,267
[Sighing]
Are we on the same page?
515
00:20:41,335 --> 00:20:43,537
I just feel bad
giving you the whole burden.
516
00:20:43,604 --> 00:20:45,939
Don't feel bad.
Burden me up!
517
00:20:46,007 --> 00:20:47,273
[Growling]
518
00:20:50,711 --> 00:20:52,012
All right?
519
00:20:52,079 --> 00:20:53,112
Fine.
520
00:20:54,649 --> 00:20:57,784
Well? Give it to me.
521
00:20:57,852 --> 00:21:02,155
What? You want me to,
like, mime giving it to you?
522
00:21:02,222 --> 00:21:05,324
I think it would be
a nice symbolic gesture, yes.
523
00:21:06,594 --> 00:21:07,861
All right.
524
00:21:17,638 --> 00:21:18,905
That's it?
525
00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:20,907
Yes.
526
00:21:20,975 --> 00:21:22,609
You're lying.
I know there's more!
Stop!
527
00:21:22,677 --> 00:21:24,644
I know there's more.
Come on, you're holding!
528
00:21:24,712 --> 00:21:25,779
Aha!
529
00:21:27,915 --> 00:21:28,982
Ohh!
530
00:21:30,150 --> 00:21:32,052
Oh, that is pure burden.
531
00:21:34,956 --> 00:21:36,489
You're an idiot.
532
00:21:37,357 --> 00:21:38,658
I love you.
533
00:21:44,699 --> 00:21:47,934
So, should I conclude
that the storm has passed?
534
00:21:49,637 --> 00:21:50,837
Yes, dad.
535
00:22:01,816 --> 00:22:03,083
And break.
37368
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