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1
00:00:05,606 --> 00:00:10,678
* FROZEN IN A TIME
AND SPACE DIVIDE *
2
00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:20,088
* BUT HOW WOULD
THE UNIVERSE SURVIVE? *
3
00:00:21,655 --> 00:00:27,495
* DUCK DODGERS OF THE 24th
AND ONE-HALF CENTURY *
4
00:00:31,399 --> 00:00:36,104
* PROTECTING THE POWERLESS
AND THE WEAK *
5
00:00:38,206 --> 00:00:44,044
* DUCK DODGERS,
HE'S FIGHTING TYRANNY *
6
00:00:47,215 --> 00:00:53,087
* IN THE 24th
AND ONE-HALF CENTURY *
7
00:01:13,607 --> 00:01:15,776
Man: TONIGHT,
PREPARE YOURSELF
8
00:01:15,843 --> 00:01:19,413
FOR ALL-OUT EXTREME
NITRO EXCITEMENT.
9
00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:21,182
WATCH...
10
00:01:21,249 --> 00:01:23,016
THINGS...
11
00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:24,752
EXPLODE!
12
00:01:26,154 --> 00:01:29,223
I WEEP FOR THE BRAIN
THIS APPEALS TO.
13
00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:32,126
MAYBE SOMETHING'S
ON THE CLASSIC NETWORK.
14
00:01:32,193 --> 00:01:34,262
[AS JOHN WAYNE]
DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, STUMPY.
15
00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:38,166
NOTHING BUT PRUNES AND DANISHES
FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK.
16
00:01:38,232 --> 00:01:39,667
HA HA HA HA.
17
00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:41,669
THIS IS A CLASSIC?
18
00:01:41,735 --> 00:01:43,737
Announcer: HA HA HA!
19
00:01:43,804 --> 00:01:47,275
HAPPY-CAT SAY GET
READY FOR BIG-TIME FUN.
20
00:01:47,341 --> 00:01:51,078
FUN BUYING HAPPY-CAT
PRODUCTS, THAT IS.
21
00:01:51,145 --> 00:01:53,414
HAPPY CAT FLOOR WAX...
22
00:01:53,481 --> 00:01:56,016
HAPPY CAT POWER MITER SAW...
23
00:01:56,083 --> 00:02:01,255
AND THE OLD-NEW
HAPPY CAT TURKEY FRYER.
24
00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:08,562
MARKET-DRIVEN CRUD
CAN THE PUBLIC STAND?
25
00:02:08,629 --> 00:02:10,864
WHAT THE PEOPLE
NEED IS SOMETHING
26
00:02:10,931 --> 00:02:13,066
WITH A LITTLE ARTISTIC VISION,
27
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,068
SOMETHING WITH A HEART.
28
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:17,104
SOMETHING LIKE MY
AUTOBIOGRAPHICAL SCRIPT
29
00:02:17,171 --> 00:02:19,473
RECENTLY SUBMITTED
TO VERMIN PICTURES.
30
00:02:19,540 --> 00:02:20,941
AND WITH A NAME LIKE VERMIN,
31
00:02:21,008 --> 00:02:24,378
YOU KNOW THEY HAVE THE PUBLIC'S
BEST INTERESTS IN MIND.
32
00:02:24,445 --> 00:02:26,480
C-CAPTAIN DODGERS!
C-CAPTAIN DODGERS!
33
00:02:26,547 --> 00:02:29,250
THERE'S A CALL FOR YOU
ON THE VIEW SCREEN.
34
00:02:29,317 --> 00:02:30,784
IT'S FROM HOLLYWOOD PLANET.
35
00:02:30,851 --> 00:02:32,052
PUT THEM THROUGH.
36
00:02:32,119 --> 00:02:34,388
DODGER, BABY,
YOU LOOK GREAT.
37
00:02:34,455 --> 00:02:35,723
DID YOU LOSE WEIGHT?
38
00:02:35,789 --> 00:02:36,924
WHO ARE YOU?
39
00:02:36,990 --> 00:02:38,492
THIS IS EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
40
00:02:38,559 --> 00:02:41,395
AND DIRECTOR-TO-BEAT-ALL
HARRY VERMIN.
41
00:02:41,462 --> 00:02:45,433
I WANT TO TURN YOUR SCRIPT
INTO A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE.
42
00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:46,800
MEET ME AT 10 QUADRISECS
43
00:02:46,867 --> 00:02:48,569
AT THE COMMISSARY
OF VERMIN STUDIOS.
44
00:02:48,636 --> 00:02:52,240
I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU
A STAR, BABY, A STAR.
45
00:02:52,306 --> 00:02:54,041
DID YOU HEAR THAT,
CADET?
46
00:02:54,107 --> 00:02:58,279
ME, A STAR!
47
00:02:58,346 --> 00:03:00,814
I WAS BORN ACCUSTOMED TO.
48
00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:02,049
SO PACK MY BAGS.
49
00:03:02,115 --> 00:03:04,318
I'M GOING TO
NEED A FLUNKY.
50
00:03:29,943 --> 00:03:31,011
HEH HEH HEH HEH.
51
00:03:31,078 --> 00:03:32,546
WELCOME TO
THE BIG TIME, BOYS.
52
00:03:32,613 --> 00:03:34,181
HEY, WHAT'S WITH
GLOOMY GUS HERE?
53
00:03:34,248 --> 00:03:35,816
HE LOOKS LIKE
SOMEONE FLUSHED
HIS HAMSTER.
54
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:38,719
CAPTAIN DODGERS IS
QUIET AND INTROSPECTIVE
55
00:03:38,786 --> 00:03:40,888
B-BECAUSE HE'S TRYING
TO FIND HIS CHARACTER.
56
00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:42,423
BUT HE'S PLAYING HIMSELF.
57
00:03:42,490 --> 00:03:45,359
CAPTAIN DODGERS ALSO REQUESTS
THAT THE FOLLOWING ITEMS
58
00:03:45,426 --> 00:03:46,927
BE AVAILABLE IN HIS TRAILER.
59
00:03:46,994 --> 00:03:50,498
S-SALTINES, POTATO CHIPS,
13 POUNDS OF DRIED KIELBASA,
60
00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:52,966
A POMEGRANATE-SCENTED
AROMATHERAPY CANDLE,
61
00:03:53,033 --> 00:03:54,602
A RING-TAILED LEMUR--
62
00:03:54,668 --> 00:03:58,171
LOOK, DODGERS BABY,
WHATEVER YOU WANT, YOU GOT IT,
63
00:03:58,238 --> 00:03:59,907
THIS IS YOUR PICTURE.
64
00:03:59,973 --> 00:04:01,942
THAT'S RIGHT, IT IS.
65
00:04:02,009 --> 00:04:03,777
I'M SERIOUS ABOUT THE LEMUR.
66
00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:06,179
LOOK, WE'RE ON
A TIGHT SCHEDULE HERE.
67
00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,148
IN FACT, WE'RE
ALREADY 6 WEEKS LATE.
68
00:04:08,215 --> 00:04:10,183
BUT WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED.
69
00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:11,985
THAT DOESN'T STOP
MY FINANCIAL BACKER
70
00:04:12,052 --> 00:04:13,387
FROM BREATHING
DOWN MY NECK.
71
00:04:13,454 --> 00:04:14,722
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
72
00:04:14,788 --> 00:04:16,424
WELL, THIS IS
MR. MONEYBAGS NOW.
73
00:04:16,490 --> 00:04:18,025
WHY DON'T YOU
TWO SUPERSTARS
74
00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,259
GET MEASURED
FOR YOUR COSTUMES
75
00:04:19,327 --> 00:04:21,194
AND LET DADDY
TAKE THIS CALL.
76
00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,396
WHATEVER.
77
00:04:22,463 --> 00:04:24,365
THERE YOU GO.
GOOD KIDS.
78
00:04:24,432 --> 00:04:26,534
BEAT IT.
VERMIN HERE.
79
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:29,637
IS OUR PLAN
PROGRESSING SMOOTHLY?
80
00:04:29,703 --> 00:04:31,972
SMOOTH AS
A SOW'S EAR, BABY.
81
00:04:32,039 --> 00:04:34,542
SO YOU'VE HIRED
THE ASSASSIN?
82
00:04:34,608 --> 00:04:38,211
ONLY THE MOST
DANGEROUS PROFESSIONAL
MONEY COULD BUY.
83
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:39,947
DON'T WORRY,
THIS THING'S COVERED.
84
00:04:40,013 --> 00:04:43,817
REMEMBER, VERMIN, I'LL FINANCE
YOUR NEXT 10 PICTURES
85
00:04:43,884 --> 00:04:47,421
IF YOU GET RID OF
DODGERS ONCE AND FOR ALL.
86
00:04:47,488 --> 00:04:49,623
HEY, STAY BEAUTIFUL,
KIDDO. PEACE OUT.
87
00:04:49,690 --> 00:04:52,360
I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M GOING
TO DESTROY A BELOVED HERO
88
00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:55,463
JUST TO FURTHER
MY OWN SELFISH AIMS.
89
00:04:55,529 --> 00:04:58,499
I LOVE THIS TOWN!
90
00:05:03,404 --> 00:05:04,905
ALL RIGHT,
DODGERS BABY.
91
00:05:04,972 --> 00:05:07,708
IN THIS SCENE,
WE INTRODUCE
YOUR LOVE INTEREST,
92
00:05:07,775 --> 00:05:11,745
THE EAGER, YOUNG,
AND MAY I ADD,
BEAUTIFUL SPACE CADET.
93
00:05:11,812 --> 00:05:16,216
C-CAPTAIN DODGERS DOES
NOT HAVE A B-BEAUTIFUL,
YOUNG SPACE CADET.
94
00:05:16,283 --> 00:05:18,719
CAN'T ARGUE WITH HIM THERE.
95
00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:20,588
YEAH, WE ADDED HER
IN THE REWRITE.
96
00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:24,057
BUT I THOUGHT THIS WAS
THE T-TRUE STORY
OF DUCK DODGERS.
97
00:05:24,124 --> 00:05:27,060
WELL, IT IS,
BUT IN ORDER TO MAKE
THESE TRUE STORIES
98
00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:30,297
MORE ACCURATE, WE ADD
FICTITIOUS CHARACTERS
AND EVENTS.
99
00:05:30,364 --> 00:05:32,966
THIS ALLOWS THE WRITERS
MORE LEEWAY TO
FABRICATE A STORY
100
00:05:33,033 --> 00:05:36,003
THAT'S ACTUALLY MORE
TRUE THAN THE REAL
EVENTS. HEH HEH HEH.
101
00:05:36,069 --> 00:05:37,270
SOUNDS GOOD TO ME.
102
00:05:37,337 --> 00:05:39,507
THAT DOESN'T MAKE
A LICK OF SENSE.
103
00:05:39,573 --> 00:05:42,676
NOW, LOOK, BOYS, WE CAN QUIBBLE
ABOUT THIS ALL DAY.
104
00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:44,712
WHY DON'T YOU MEET
THE ACTRESS FIRST.
105
00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:46,013
OH, NINA.
106
00:05:52,820 --> 00:05:53,854
[CRASH]
107
00:05:53,921 --> 00:05:56,890
WHICH ONE DO YOU
WANT ME TO ICE, HARRY,
108
00:05:56,957 --> 00:05:58,459
THE PIG OR THE DUCK?
109
00:05:58,526 --> 00:06:00,193
HA HA HA.
THE DUCK.
110
00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:02,796
THIS IS GOING
TO BE TOO EASY.
111
00:06:02,863 --> 00:06:05,733
JUST DO ME A FAVOR AND MAKE
IT QUICK ON THE POOR JERK.
112
00:06:05,799 --> 00:06:07,100
I'M PAYING YOU BY THE HOUR.
113
00:06:07,167 --> 00:06:09,437
OK, DODGERS,
HERE'S THE DEAL.
114
00:06:09,503 --> 00:06:11,338
YOU TWO KIDS ARE
VERY MUCH IN LOVE,
115
00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:13,373
BUT IT'S JUST
NOT MEANT TO BE.
116
00:06:13,441 --> 00:06:15,242
SO YOU JUST TRY
AND LET HER DOWN EASY.
117
00:06:15,308 --> 00:06:19,447
ROLL CAMERA AND...ACTION!
118
00:06:19,513 --> 00:06:21,482
Man: DUCK DODGERS.
THE MOVIE.
119
00:06:21,549 --> 00:06:23,884
LOVE SCENE.
TAKE 1.
120
00:06:25,786 --> 00:06:28,522
IT'S OVER!
HIT THE BRICKS, SISTER!
121
00:06:28,589 --> 00:06:29,857
IF THERE'S ONE THING I HATE,
122
00:06:29,923 --> 00:06:32,125
IT'S A GIRLFRIEND
WHO CAN'T TAKE A HINT.
123
00:06:32,192 --> 00:06:33,661
WE ARE THROUGH!
124
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:36,797
HASTA LA VISTA, BABY.
125
00:06:36,864 --> 00:06:39,933
AND...SCENE.
126
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:43,571
T-TALK ABOUT A RERUN
OF LAST VALENTINE'S DAY.
127
00:06:43,637 --> 00:06:45,639
UH, YOUR LEVEL OF
INTENSITY IS GOOD,
128
00:06:45,706 --> 00:06:48,609
BUT ON THIS NEXT TAKE, LET'S
GO FOR SUBTLE AND TENDER,
129
00:06:48,676 --> 00:06:51,311
LOVEY-DOVEY,
KISSY-WISSY.
130
00:06:51,378 --> 00:06:53,614
AND...ACTION!
131
00:06:53,681 --> 00:06:55,583
Man: DUCK DODGERS,
THE MOVIE.
132
00:06:55,649 --> 00:06:57,818
LOVE SCENE.
TAKE 2.
133
00:07:00,120 --> 00:07:04,257
OH, CADET, MY LOVEY-DOVEY,
POOKIE-WOOKUMS.
134
00:07:04,324 --> 00:07:08,629
OUR LOVE...
IS NOT MEANT TO BE.
135
00:07:08,696 --> 00:07:10,631
OH, MY CAPTAIN...
136
00:07:10,698 --> 00:07:12,633
UH-OH IN MY STOMACH.
137
00:07:12,700 --> 00:07:16,303
ONE LAST KISS
BEFORE WE PART.
138
00:07:16,369 --> 00:07:19,172
[SLURP SLURP]
139
00:07:20,841 --> 00:07:23,243
HEY, HEY, ENOUGH WITH
THE KISSING ALREADY.
140
00:07:23,310 --> 00:07:24,912
I HAD CLAMS FOR LUNCH.
141
00:07:30,117 --> 00:07:33,521
REMEMBER, KIDS, NEVER
GET A CUT-RATE FACE LIFT.
142
00:07:33,587 --> 00:07:37,090
I SHOULD BE PAYING
YOU FOR THIS ONE, HARRY.
143
00:07:37,157 --> 00:07:38,258
KNOCK 'EM DEAD, NINA.
144
00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:40,327
WITH PLEASURE.
145
00:07:40,393 --> 00:07:41,795
Vermin: AND...ACTION!
146
00:07:41,862 --> 00:07:44,632
OH, MY DARLING.
OH, MY DARLING.
147
00:07:44,698 --> 00:07:47,234
OH, MY DARLING CLEMENTINE.
148
00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:49,402
* I WAS LOST
AND GONE FOREVER *
149
00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,404
* SIMPLE PARTING,
CLEMENTINE *
150
00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:53,073
NOW, HARRY?
151
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:56,343
YEAH, YEAH, HURRY
BEFORE HE STARTS
THE CHORUS AGAIN.
152
00:07:56,409 --> 00:07:58,612
DODGERS, YOUR TIME IS UP.
153
00:07:58,679 --> 00:08:00,413
HANG ON, SWEETIE,
I'M ALMOST FINISHED.
154
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:02,816
YOU'RE ALREADY FINISHED.
155
00:08:04,618 --> 00:08:07,220
H.V., I THINK
WE'RE OUT OF SCRIPT.
156
00:08:07,287 --> 00:08:09,557
GO WITH IT.
IT'S REAL, BABY.
157
00:08:09,623 --> 00:08:11,992
NOW FOR MY REVENGE.
158
00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:14,461
LOOK, I TOLD YOU WHEN
WE FIRST STARTED DATING
159
00:08:14,528 --> 00:08:16,263
THAT I PLAYED THE BANJO.
160
00:08:25,005 --> 00:08:27,240
YOU REALIZE
THAT'S ONLY A BANJO.
161
00:08:27,307 --> 00:08:31,344
ONLY A BANJO, HA!
AND YOU THOUGHT YOU KNEW ME.
162
00:08:31,411 --> 00:08:32,546
AAH!
163
00:08:32,613 --> 00:08:34,715
WHY, THIS BANJO
IS AS DEAR TO ME
164
00:08:34,782 --> 00:08:36,784
AS A MEMBER OF MY OWN FAMILY.
165
00:08:40,453 --> 00:08:42,522
CHEAP STUPID BANJO.
166
00:08:46,493 --> 00:08:50,497
HA! DID YOU THINK YOU COULD
DISARM ME WITH A BROKEN BANJO?
167
00:08:50,564 --> 00:08:54,234
THAT WASN'T JUST ANY BROKEN
BANJO, IT WAS A KOOKABURRA
168
00:08:54,301 --> 00:08:57,037
SPECIAL LIMITED
RESONANCE FROM AUSTRALIA.
169
00:08:57,104 --> 00:09:01,308
OH, NO, THE KLIBURN EFFECT
OF RETURN RESONANT VIBRATION.
170
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:03,777
YOU KNOW YOUR MUSIC THEORY.
171
00:09:05,713 --> 00:09:07,648
COME TO PAPA.
172
00:09:09,016 --> 00:09:12,853
WOW! THAT ACTUALLY WORKED.
173
00:09:12,920 --> 00:09:17,524
YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE, CADET,
BUT NOW THE NUNCHUCKS
ARE ON THE OTHER FOOT.
174
00:09:17,591 --> 00:09:20,460
YOU SHALL RECEIVE NO MERCY.
175
00:09:20,527 --> 00:09:21,729
[CRASHING SOUND]
176
00:09:21,795 --> 00:09:26,033
WHOOPS! WELL,
MAYBE A LITTLE MERCY.
177
00:09:26,099 --> 00:09:29,569
IF MERCY'S NOT GOOD FOR YOU,
HOW ABOUT A WHOLE
LOT OF LOVING?
178
00:09:29,637 --> 00:09:31,104
I'LL PASS.
179
00:09:32,606 --> 00:09:35,809
CADET, REMEMBER ALL
WE'VE MEANT TO EACH OTHER.
180
00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:40,180
I NEVER LOVED YOU.
IT WAS ONLY A JOB TO ME.
181
00:09:41,982 --> 00:09:44,551
I ONCE HAD A CADET
WHO KNEW THAT BEING A CADET
182
00:09:44,618 --> 00:09:46,353
WAS MORE THAN JUST A JOB.
183
00:09:46,419 --> 00:09:50,357
I COUNT MYSELF AS PRIVILEGED
TO HAVE SERVED BESIDE HIM.
184
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:52,860
SO, WHERE IS HE NOW?
185
00:09:53,661 --> 00:09:56,529
HERE I AM.
186
00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:58,531
[GASPS]
187
00:09:58,598 --> 00:10:01,601
C-CHEW THAT SCENERY, TOOTS.
188
00:10:01,669 --> 00:10:03,203
CUT, CUT,
CUT, CUT, CUT.
189
00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:07,207
THANKS TO YOU, WE HAVE TO
DO THIS WHOLE SCENE AGAIN.
190
00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:09,176
LUCKY ME.
191
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:15,649
ALL RIGHT, DODGERS.
OUR NEXT SCENE TAKES PLACE
192
00:10:15,716 --> 00:10:18,318
IN THIS RE-CREATION
OF THE MARTIAN DESERT.
193
00:10:22,055 --> 00:10:25,392
BUT WE ARE ON LOCATION.
THIS IS THE MARTIAN DESERT.
194
00:10:25,458 --> 00:10:27,627
OH, SILLY ME,
I GUESS IT IS.
195
00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:29,096
THOSE BOYS IN
THE SET DEPARTMENT
196
00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:30,931
DO SUCH GOOD WORK
THESE DAYS.
197
00:10:30,998 --> 00:10:33,233
WELL, MAYBE THEY SHOULD
START WRITING SCRIPTS,
198
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:36,069
BECAUSE I CAN'T MAKE HEADS
OR TAILS OUT OF THIS JUNK.
199
00:10:36,136 --> 00:10:39,406
LOOK, IN THIS SCENE,
THE MARTIAN QUEEN HAS DECLARED
200
00:10:39,472 --> 00:10:43,610
HER UNDYING LOVE AND PROMISED
TO MAKE YOU THE KING OF MARS.
201
00:10:43,677 --> 00:10:47,514
KING OF MARS!
WHO WOULD BELIEVE SUCH NONSENSE?
202
00:10:47,580 --> 00:10:49,349
THIS STORY STINKS.
203
00:10:49,416 --> 00:10:50,918
LET'S BE HONEST, KIDDO.
204
00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:54,121
THIS IS AN ACTION COMEDY
STARRING A CARTOON DUCK.
205
00:10:54,187 --> 00:10:57,858
NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE STORY,
SO YOU JUST LISTEN CAREFULLY,
206
00:10:57,925 --> 00:11:02,029
AND FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS
'CAUSE I AM THE DIRECTOR HERE!
207
00:11:03,596 --> 00:11:06,834
I CAN'T WAIT TO LOSE
THIS DOOFUS IN POST.
208
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:08,736
Man: DUCK DODGERS,
THE MOVIE.
209
00:11:08,802 --> 00:11:11,038
DESERT SCENE.
TAKE 1.
210
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:13,707
AND...ACTION!
211
00:11:13,774 --> 00:11:16,209
Vermin: YOU'RE LOST
IN THE MARTIAN DESERT.
212
00:11:16,276 --> 00:11:21,048
THE BLAZING SUN IS MERCILESS.
YOU'RE DYING OF THIRST!
213
00:11:21,114 --> 00:11:22,615
[COUGHS]
214
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:26,019
SAY, VERMIN, WHO'LL
BE PLAYING THE PART OF
THE MARTIAN QUEEN?
215
00:11:26,086 --> 00:11:29,656
I MUST ADMIT, I'M PARTIAL
TO MS. MARILU HENNER.
216
00:11:29,723 --> 00:11:32,893
[GROWLING]
217
00:11:32,960 --> 00:11:36,229
YOU TRUDGE ON
BUT SUDDENLY STOP
218
00:11:36,296 --> 00:11:39,166
AND DISCOVER YOU'RE TRAPPED
IN DEADLY QUICKSAND!
219
00:11:39,232 --> 00:11:41,301
BUT I'M NOT
TRAPPED IN QUICKSAND.
220
00:11:41,368 --> 00:11:43,703
YES, YES, YOU ARE.
YOU'RE STUCK,
221
00:11:43,771 --> 00:11:48,041
LIKE A HELPLESS
LITTLE FLY TRAPPED BY
A VILLAINOUS SPIDER.
222
00:11:48,108 --> 00:11:49,276
NO, I'M NOT.
223
00:11:49,342 --> 00:11:51,478
IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE
I'M TRAPPED AT ALL.
224
00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:53,646
ARE YOU SURE
THIS IS QUICKSAND?
225
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,917
DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH
THAT DEATHTRAP COST?
226
00:11:56,984 --> 00:11:58,718
WELL, I'M NOT SINKING.
227
00:11:58,786 --> 00:12:01,889
WELL, YOU'VE GOT TO GIVE
IT A CHANCE TO KICK IN.
228
00:12:04,424 --> 00:12:08,628
NOTHING.
229
00:12:08,695 --> 00:12:13,000
UH-UH.
230
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:17,037
HELP! HELP! SOMEBODY HELP!
231
00:12:17,104 --> 00:12:19,572
OH, GOOD.
GOOD, BABY.
WORK IT.
232
00:12:19,639 --> 00:12:22,275
GOT TO BREAK FREE.
233
00:12:22,342 --> 00:12:25,879
TOO MUCH TO RESIST!
234
00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,583
GEEZ, DODGERS, CAN'T
YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT?
235
00:12:30,650 --> 00:12:32,519
HA, LIKE YOU COULD DO
ANY BETTER.
236
00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,789
I COULD DO BETTER.
WHY, ANYBODY
COULD DO BETTER.
237
00:12:35,856 --> 00:12:37,791
YOU SEE, IT'S ACTUALLY
QUITE SIMPLE.
238
00:12:37,858 --> 00:12:39,993
IN FACT, I FEEL
IT WORKING ALREADY.
239
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:43,330
HEY! YOU'RE SINKING.
YOU'RE ACTUALLY SINKING.
240
00:12:43,396 --> 00:12:44,764
OF COURSE I AM.
241
00:12:44,832 --> 00:12:46,666
ALL YOU HAVE TO DO
IS PUT YOUR MIND TO IT.
242
00:12:46,733 --> 00:12:51,304
IT'S REALLY BEAUTIFUL.
ALMOST AN ART FORM
THE WAY YOU DO IT.
243
00:12:51,371 --> 00:12:53,974
WHY, THANK...YOU.
244
00:12:54,041 --> 00:12:57,277
I WONDER IF MARILU
HAS PLANS FOR LUNCH.
245
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:03,016
[MUFFLED]
I HATE YOU, DODGERS.
HATE YOU.
246
00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:17,330
YO, YO, SUGAR DADDY.
247
00:13:17,397 --> 00:13:20,467
ARE YOU CERTAIN
THIS WILL WORK, VERMIN?
248
00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:25,472
HEY, WOULD I KID
A PSYCHOTIC MARTIAN NUT JOB?
249
00:13:25,538 --> 00:13:28,441
YEESH.
250
00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:30,610
B-BUT HOW ARE THEY GOING
TO EXPLAIN THE CHANGE
IN THE MOVIE?
251
00:13:30,677 --> 00:13:33,280
WELL, THE WRITERS HAVE
GOT THAT ALL FIGURED OUT.
252
00:13:33,346 --> 00:13:35,648
YOU SEE, SHE'S BEING
EVAPORATED UP TO THE SHIP
253
00:13:35,715 --> 00:13:39,086
AND THERE'S INTERFERENCE FROM
A FIERCE ELECTRICAL STORM.
254
00:13:39,152 --> 00:13:42,489
AND TRAGEDY STRIKES WHEN
THE EVAPORATOR MALFUNCTIONS.
255
00:13:42,555 --> 00:13:46,726
WE FINALLY MANAGE
TO STABILIZE THE SITUATION,
BUT IT'S TOO LATE.
256
00:13:46,793 --> 00:13:51,899
SHE'S BEEN TRANSFORMED...
INTO A HIDEOUS CREATURE.
257
00:13:51,965 --> 00:13:56,536
THAT'S WHERE YOU COME IN, BABE.
258
00:13:56,603 --> 00:14:00,407
ALL RIGHT, DODGERS BABY.
THIS IS THE BIG KILLER SCENE
259
00:14:00,473 --> 00:14:03,276
WHERE YOU SAVE THE CADET, WHO'S
BEEN CHAINED TO A GIANT BLOCK,
260
00:14:03,343 --> 00:14:05,612
FROM A GIANT RAGING
ASTRO DRAGON.
261
00:14:05,678 --> 00:14:09,016
B-BUT CAPTAIN DODGERS
NEVER RESCUED ME FROM
AN ASTRO DRAGON.
262
00:14:09,082 --> 00:14:12,752
WELL, IT MUST HAVE BEEN
SOMETHING LIKE THAT, EH?
263
00:14:12,819 --> 00:14:14,888
WELL, THERE WAS THIS
TIME WHEN A BEE FLEW
264
00:14:14,955 --> 00:14:16,723
DANGEROUSLY
NEAR THE CADET
265
00:14:16,789 --> 00:14:18,558
AND I SWATTED IT
WITH A NEWSPAPER.
266
00:14:18,625 --> 00:14:20,627
THE BEE STUNG ME.
267
00:14:20,693 --> 00:14:23,263
PERFECT.
INSPIRED BY TRUE EVENTS.
268
00:14:23,330 --> 00:14:25,032
Man: DUCK DODGERS,
THE MOVIE.
269
00:14:25,098 --> 00:14:29,636
ARENA SCENE.
TAKE 1.
270
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:32,405
Vermin: CADET, YOU'RE SCARED.
YOU'VE BEEN CHAINED TO A BLOCK.
271
00:14:32,472 --> 00:14:35,008
YOU TURN AND LOOK
AT THE JEERING CROWD...
272
00:14:35,075 --> 00:14:36,809
THAT WILL BE ADDED
LATER IN C.G.
273
00:14:36,876 --> 00:14:39,012
YOU HEAR SOMETHING.
274
00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:41,148
YOU FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE
TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.
275
00:14:41,214 --> 00:14:43,183
THAT WILL BE ADDED
LATER IN C.G., TOO.
276
00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:44,684
BUT THERE'S NO PLACE TO GO!
277
00:14:44,751 --> 00:14:47,020
YOU LOOK AROUND, BUT
THERE'S NO HELP IN SIGHT.
278
00:14:47,087 --> 00:14:49,990
THEN YOU SEE A GLIMPSE
OF THE MONSTER!
279
00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:55,528
IS THIS WHERE I RUN IN
AND SAVE THE DAY?
280
00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:57,497
LOOK, I'M TRYING TO
CREATE DRAMATIC TENSION.
281
00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:59,299
I'LL LET YOU KNOW
WHEN TO GO IN.
282
00:14:59,366 --> 00:15:01,601
THE MONSTER ENTERS THE ARENA.
283
00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:04,904
NOW JUST GO WITH IT!
284
00:15:04,972 --> 00:15:07,374
[SNORTING]
285
00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:08,408
[ROARING]
286
00:15:08,475 --> 00:15:10,043
AAH!
287
00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:11,311
GRRR.
AAH!
288
00:15:11,378 --> 00:15:13,680
Vermin: ENTER DUCK DODGERS!
289
00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:15,215
I THINK IF IT'S OK WITH YOU,
290
00:15:15,282 --> 00:15:17,350
I'LL LET THAT THING
SETTLE DOWN A BIT.
291
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,819
I SAID, "ENTER
DUCK DODGERS!"
292
00:15:19,886 --> 00:15:23,190
OK. SOMEBODY'S ON A POWER TRIP.
293
00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:24,524
AAH!
294
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:28,195
HEY, HAM BONE, KNOCK
OFF THE CORNY SCREAMING.
295
00:15:28,261 --> 00:15:31,398
I-I'M NOT ACTING.
I THINK HE MEANS
BUSINESS.
296
00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:33,466
[ROARING]
297
00:15:33,533 --> 00:15:35,902
HEY, VERMIN, THIS IS ONE
298
00:15:35,969 --> 00:15:38,338
OF THOSE TRAINED
ASTRO DRAGONS, RIGHT?
299
00:15:38,405 --> 00:15:42,009
HEH HEH. YOU KNOW, THE TRAINED
ONES ARE A LOT MORE EXPENSIVE.
300
00:15:42,075 --> 00:15:43,543
STUPID BUDGET CUTS.
301
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:46,279
HEY, WE'RE STILL ROLLING.
MAKE WITH THE ACTION!
302
00:15:46,346 --> 00:15:50,683
I'M NOT AFRAID OF YOU.
I'VE GOT SUPER TECHNOLOGY.
303
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:51,718
[SNORTING]
304
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:54,988
WHAT'S THE MATTER?
305
00:15:55,055 --> 00:15:57,090
I--I LOVE "THE WIZARD OF OZ."
306
00:15:57,157 --> 00:15:59,659
ALL RIGHT, I'VE
GOT YOU CORNERED.
307
00:15:59,726 --> 00:16:01,694
YOU BIG STUPID MONSTER.
308
00:16:01,761 --> 00:16:03,563
BACK INTO YOUR PEN,
MORON.
309
00:16:07,367 --> 00:16:16,209
[ROARING]
310
00:16:16,276 --> 00:16:17,944
POOR BRAVE
CAPTAIN DODGERS.
311
00:16:18,011 --> 00:16:20,847
HE'S SACRIFICING HIS
LIFE THAT I MAY LIVE.
312
00:16:20,913 --> 00:16:23,316
AAH!
313
00:16:23,383 --> 00:16:25,385
HE'LL BE OK.
HE'LL BE OK.
HE'LL BE OK.
314
00:16:29,856 --> 00:16:30,823
AAH!
315
00:16:30,890 --> 00:16:32,425
AH, THIS IS PRICELESS.
316
00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:34,694
YOU DROP THAT
PIG RIGHT NOW.
317
00:16:34,761 --> 00:16:36,629
PUT HIM DOWN!
318
00:16:36,696 --> 00:16:39,699
YOU HEARD ME,
BIG FELLA.
PUT HIM DOWN.
319
00:16:39,766 --> 00:16:41,034
[SIGHING]
320
00:16:41,101 --> 00:16:45,138
THAT'S IT.
NICE AND EASY LIKE--
321
00:16:45,205 --> 00:16:46,706
A LITTLE TO THE LEFT.
322
00:16:46,773 --> 00:16:48,808
[SPITTING SOUND]
323
00:16:48,875 --> 00:16:51,411
OH, NO! THIS ISN'T HAPPENING.
324
00:16:55,715 --> 00:16:58,385
SIT, BIG RED.
GOOD PUPPY.
325
00:16:58,451 --> 00:17:01,454
A LITTLE LOVE AND DISCIPLINE
WAS ALL HE NEEDED.
326
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:03,923
DODGERS! WHAT DO YOU
THINK YOU'RE DOING?
327
00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:05,592
YOU'RE RUINING
EVERYTHING.
328
00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:08,495
IF I WERE YOU, I WOULDN'T
BE YELLING AT ME RIGHT NOW.
329
00:17:08,561 --> 00:17:12,165
I AM THE DIRECTOR.
YELLING AT YOU IS MY JOB!
330
00:17:12,232 --> 00:17:14,934
[ROARING]
331
00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:17,537
AAH! LET ME OUT!
LET ME OUT!
332
00:17:17,604 --> 00:17:19,439
YOU'LL NEVER EAT LUNCH
IN THIS TOWN AGAIN.
333
00:17:19,506 --> 00:17:22,409
I ESTIMATE HE'LL
TAKE 12 TO 14 HOURS
334
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:25,145
TO WORK HIS WAY THROUGH
THE DIGESTIVE TRACT.
335
00:17:25,212 --> 00:17:28,748
I THOUGHT THE INSIDE
OF HIS M-MOUTH
WAS GROSS.
336
00:17:28,815 --> 00:17:30,983
THAT MEANS WE HAVE TIME
FOR A ROUND OF GOLF.
337
00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,086
Vermin: HEY,
WE'RE LOSING LIGHT, PEOPLE!
338
00:17:35,255 --> 00:17:38,458
EVERYTHING'S GOING
COMPLETELY ACCORDING TO PLAN.
339
00:17:38,525 --> 00:17:39,326
HEH HEH HEH.
340
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:41,128
THEN DUCK DODGERS IS FINISHED?
341
00:17:41,194 --> 00:17:45,265
HUZZA!
342
00:17:45,332 --> 00:17:48,201
DODGERS IS STILL ALIVE,
ISN'T HE?
343
00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:50,303
BUT NOT FOR LONG, BABY.
344
00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:55,508
I THINK THIS PICTURE IS ABOUT
TO REACH ITS EXPLOSIVE CLIMAX.
345
00:17:55,575 --> 00:17:57,210
ALL RIGHT, KID,
THIS IS IT,
346
00:17:57,277 --> 00:17:58,978
THE MOST IMPORTANT
SCENE OF ALL.
347
00:17:59,045 --> 00:18:01,414
IS THIS WHERE I PUT MY
SPACE CAPTAIN CAREER ASIDE
348
00:18:01,481 --> 00:18:03,916
TO PURSUE MY DREAMS IN
THE FOOD SERVICE INDUSTRY?
349
00:18:03,983 --> 00:18:09,356
EVEN BETTER. IN THIS SCENE,
YOU GET TO DEFUSE
A BIG GIANT BOMB.
350
00:18:12,392 --> 00:18:15,862
WOW! THAT'S
A PLUTO NASH-SIZED BOMB.
351
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:19,098
THAT'S RIGHT,JUNIOR,
AND IF YOU DON'T
DEFUSE THIS BABY,
352
00:18:19,166 --> 00:18:21,334
IT'S GOING TO DESTROY
THE RAINFOREST.
353
00:18:21,401 --> 00:18:23,503
NOT THE RAINFOREST!
354
00:18:23,570 --> 00:18:26,038
HERE'S THE INSTRUCTION BOOK.
YOU GOT 60 SECONDS,
355
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:28,074
OR YOU CAN FORGET
THE RING-TAILED LEMUR.
356
00:18:28,141 --> 00:18:29,142
GOOD LUCK...
357
00:18:29,209 --> 00:18:31,211
AND ACTION!
358
00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:34,947
HEH HEH HEH.
HELLO, MARTIAN MOOLA.
359
00:18:35,014 --> 00:18:36,816
Man: DUCK DODGERS,
THE MOVIE.
360
00:18:36,883 --> 00:18:40,720
BIG KABLOOEY SCENE.
TAKE 1.
361
00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:43,690
LESS THAN A MINUTE, HUH?
SHOULD BE PLENTY OF TIME.
362
00:18:43,756 --> 00:18:45,225
HA HA HA HA.
363
00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:48,228
I DON'T KNOW WHY VERMIN GAVE
ME THIS INSTRUCTION BOOK.
364
00:18:48,295 --> 00:18:50,597
I'M PRETTY SURE
IT'S WRITTEN IN CHINESE.
365
00:18:50,663 --> 00:18:54,100
I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING WITH ALL
THESE SPARE PARTS IN THE WAY.
366
00:18:54,167 --> 00:18:55,702
HEE HEE HEE!
367
00:18:55,768 --> 00:18:58,838
HMM. THIS MIGHT BE USEFUL.
368
00:19:00,072 --> 00:19:01,774
NOPE, JUST MADE A MESS.
369
00:19:01,841 --> 00:19:05,845
I WONDER WHAT WOULD HAPPEN
IF I FILLED IT WITH FERAL CATS.
370
00:19:09,115 --> 00:19:13,052
HA! THESE BABY HUEY COMICS
GET FUNNIER EVERY YEAR.
371
00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:16,956
C-CAPTAIN DODGERS,
SHOULDN'T YOU BE
DEFUSING THE BOMB?
372
00:19:17,023 --> 00:19:19,859
DEFUSING...THE BOMB!
373
00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:22,395
ANY SECOND NOW AND KABLOOEY!
374
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:24,664
Dodgers: MORE UNNECESSARY JUNK.
375
00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:29,869
3...2...1.
376
00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:33,673
WHAT, NO KABLOOEY?
377
00:19:33,740 --> 00:19:35,908
BUT THERE'S GOT
TO BE A KABLOOEY.
378
00:19:35,975 --> 00:19:37,877
WHAT DID YOU DO
TO MY BOMB?
379
00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:39,346
I DEFUSED IT.
380
00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:40,980
HA HA. YOU WHAT?
381
00:19:41,047 --> 00:19:42,915
JUST A SIMPLE MATTER
OF DISCONNECTING
382
00:19:42,982 --> 00:19:44,284
THAT BLUE WIRE THINGY.
383
00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:46,052
OH, WELL, I'LL
BE IN MY TRAILER.
384
00:19:46,118 --> 00:19:47,787
WHAT BLUE WIRE THINGY?
385
00:19:47,854 --> 00:19:51,458
DON'T YOU EVER WATCH THE MOVIES?
IT'S NEVER THE BLUE WIRE THINGY.
386
00:19:51,524 --> 00:19:54,026
YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO DISCONNECT
THE RED WIRE THINGY.
387
00:19:54,093 --> 00:19:55,628
LIKE SO...
388
00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:05,505
DID YOU HEAR SOMETHING?
389
00:20:05,572 --> 00:20:07,106
HEY, I SURRENDER, DODGERS.
390
00:20:07,173 --> 00:20:09,709
HARRY VERMIN KNOWS
WHEN HE'S BEATEN.
391
00:20:09,776 --> 00:20:13,780
ME AND THE MARTIAN
HAD THIS WHOLE SCAM
WORKED UP TO DO YOU IN.
392
00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:15,248
WHAT MARTIAN?
393
00:20:15,315 --> 00:20:17,617
YOU KNOW, LITTLE GUY.
HEAD LIKE A BOWLING BALL.
394
00:20:17,684 --> 00:20:19,018
THAT JERK.
395
00:20:19,085 --> 00:20:22,955
NOW LOOK AT MY STUDIO!
I'LL NEVER FINISH THIS PICTURE.
396
00:20:23,022 --> 00:20:27,794
GEE, I HATE TO SEE
A HOMICIDAL MEGALOMANIAC
SO DEPRESSED.
397
00:20:27,860 --> 00:20:29,128
UH, MR. VERMIN...
398
00:20:29,195 --> 00:20:30,597
WHAT IS IT, KID?
399
00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:33,666
I ONCE TOOK A FILM CLASS
AT A C-COMMUNITY COLLEGE
400
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:36,969
AND M-MAYBE I CAN DO
SOMETHING WITH THE
FOOTAGE YOU SHOT.
401
00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:38,905
DO YOU THINK SO?
402
00:20:42,509 --> 00:20:45,678
[CHEERING AND APPLAUSE]
403
00:20:45,745 --> 00:20:50,283
AH, THERE HE IS!
DUCK DODGERS.
404
00:20:50,350 --> 00:20:53,453
All: OH, DODGERS! WHAT A MAN.
405
00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:54,954
YOU HEAR THAT, CADET?
406
00:20:55,021 --> 00:20:56,456
I'M A STAR.
407
00:20:56,523 --> 00:20:58,458
UH, T-THOSE GIRLS
WORK FOR THE STUDIO.
408
00:20:58,525 --> 00:21:01,894
OH, MR. VERMIN, YOUR
MOVIE LOOKS FANTASTIC.
409
00:21:01,961 --> 00:21:03,496
IT SURE IS.
410
00:21:03,563 --> 00:21:06,032
PAY ATTENTION TO THE BIT AT
THE END WITH THE FLASHBACKS.
411
00:21:06,098 --> 00:21:07,834
THAT WAS ALL ME.
412
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:10,269
HEY HEY,
THE SUPERSTARS
ARE HERE.
413
00:21:10,337 --> 00:21:13,005
CADET, I LOVE THAT
BIT YOU DID AT THE END
WITH THE FLASHBACKS.
414
00:21:13,072 --> 00:21:16,242
HA HA HA. I STOLE IT FROM
A PEANUT BUTTER COMMERCIAL.
415
00:21:16,309 --> 00:21:17,877
AND YOU CATCH ON QUICK.
416
00:21:17,944 --> 00:21:20,947
WE BETTER GET IN.
THE SHOW'S ABOUT TO START.
417
00:21:26,619 --> 00:21:30,423
HERE IT COMES.
MY NAME IN LIGHTS.
418
00:21:31,891 --> 00:21:33,225
[APPLAUSE]
419
00:21:33,292 --> 00:21:37,029
WHAT! HOW COULD
YOU DO THIS TO ME?
420
00:21:37,096 --> 00:21:39,832
HE'S THE B-BANKABLE
STAR TALENT.
421
00:21:39,899 --> 00:21:42,802
SHH. I'M TRYING
TO WATCH THE PICTURE.
422
00:21:42,869 --> 00:21:45,905
DODGERS MAY LIVE, BUT DUE
TO MY INITIAL INVESTMENT,
423
00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:49,542
I, AT LEAST, STAND
TO MAKE A FINANCIAL KILLING.
31068
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